FULL SHOW: Big Show Baddies

11:56Jase:Oh, really? Backbone. That sounds about right. If you're listening and you're in Christchurch driving the Hodaki Ute, you just bloody take it easy, would you? Sort of that. So far, frontrunner, probably Moggy Minogi. I like Moggy. Moggy. I do like Moggy. Same here. Or Spoof. Have your say, New Zealand. 3, 4, 8, 3. Get yourself in the draw for a$50 red burger. Sorry, what was the last one? Sorry? I think it was. The Hodaki Big Show with Jase, Mike and Kesey. Tune in weekdays at 4 on Radio Hodaki.

12:22Keyzie:Yes, indeed. Weezer there on the radio. Hodaki Big Show this Tuesday afternoon. The time is 4.34. Hey, fellas, this Friday at 7.30 p.m. The Breakers are taking on the Adelaide 36ers. It is at home, Spark Arena. If you're listening, we'd love to take three mates along and sit sideline. We're talking right down, right next to the action there on the Backbone Bench. You and three mates, food and beverages included. How good. Text the word BENCH to 3483 and try to get yourself in the draw for that. Beautiful. Bounce, bounce, bounce, bounce, bounce, bounce. It's swish. Poof. Nice. That's right, poof.

12:57Now, fellas, you'll recall, of course,

13:00Keyzie:that we went down for the Black Clash this last weekend. I do recall that, yes. What, do you, Keezy? No, actually, to be honest, not really. And I had a revelation while I was down there. I was hit by a bit of two before, by mother reality while I was down there. And I was in my hotel room fully nude. And I'm not going to talk about, no, no, Muggie, I wasn't doing that. I was in the bathroom and I was fully nude. And can we all agree, can we all agree that bathroom lights in hotels make you look great. Are notoriously unforgiving. They make me look ripped. And I was standing in front of the full-length mirror there, fully nude.

13:46Keyzie:Yeah. And I was absolutely disgusted by what I saw. Yeah, sounds all right. Man buzzies, a little gut, a sunken concave arse, huge testicles, withered sort of white brownie patchy legs.

14:10Jase:Yeah.

14:11Keyzie:That didn't have much hair on them because they were tight sort of stovepipe jeans and it rubs all my hair off. Right. And genuinely, fellas. Did you have E.T.

14:20Jase:in the room with you?

14:21Keyzie:I, in actual fact, if you were choice, that's not a bad comparison. I look like E.T. I look like E.T. with my massive head and my bulbous nose, you know, big sacks under my eyes. Yeah, got that long-ass neck too. Yeah. And this is the truth, and I wonder if it's the truth for a lot of people out there over the holidays, text me 3483 if it's the case. I have fallen into a terrible, terrible diet. And I don't, it hasn't even been a conscious thing. I'm talking, I'm eating a lot of pies. Yeah. I'm eating a lot of chips, your curry rolls, your chocolate milk, your chocolate, your cheese. Cheese balls.

15:04Keyzie:Cheese balls. No, I've gone on to Popper Jack's now. I've got a packet of Popper Jack's in my car. as we speak. And I literally, and, you know, at that point when I was looking at myself in the mirror, I'd just eaten a massive chicken kebab. In bed? In bed. And I was like, this is dire. I need to speak to Mogey. Yeah, right. I need to get some desiccated chicken in my diet or something. You know, and there might have been the odd meal that was like, I'd say to my wife, let's have a salad. Yeah. But I don't know how it happened. Genuinely, I go, how did I get to this place where I'm eating nothing but shite.

15:42Jase:I can tell you, well, not necessarily that you're eating garbage, but I can tell you who's told you that you don't eat enough. Previously, you're in great shape. Yes. You ate nothing, you did nothing. Yes. And you're in great shape. Kesey, over the course of the last four years, has bullied you into eating more and more. You don't eat enough. He mocks you for eating one cracker. What are you talking about? You've eaten nothing all day. So now you've made yourself have an appetite, but you're continuing to do no exercise. Yeah. Barring, you know, your little strolls around the block.

16:13Keyzie:You make it sound so uncool, Mogey.

16:16Jase:Well, it's not that it's your fault, Keezy. It's that it wouldn't have happened without your input.

16:21Keyzie:Well, it's funny you should say that because, you know, whenever I'm about to hoe into a pie, I always go, Keezy will be happy. No, you do not. That is a lie. And also me taking responsibility for Jace's rig. Yeah. That's a pretty big thing to lob my way. Is anyone else in this situation out there, by the way, 3483? Over the holiday break, they've just blown out. Yeah, is anyone else in a similar situation of not liking Jase's rig? 3483. Do you like Incubus? Yeah, you do. The Hauraki Big Show with Jase, Mike and Kesey. Tune in weekdays at 4 on Radio Hauraki. R.E.M. there on the Radio Hauraki Big Show this Tuesday afternoon.

17:02Keyzie:The time is 4.46. Let's talk TV. What's on the telly with Mike Minogue?

17:26Keyzie:Jase. Jase. Joanne, man, come on. Yes.

17:34Jase:I was lying at home, Jase, last night thinking about you. and I watched so I watched put on E.T. But without a word of the lie I watched that over the break my daughter had not seen it before Yes Four and a half stars brilliant Yes it is a great movie It's so bloody good that's a that's a freaky looking little bastard that E.T. I'll tell you what Still holds up though? Still holds up very very good Four and a half buzzies out of five possible buzzies I'll leave it there if you haven't seen it watch it and I think it's on TVNZ Plus Great Yeah, good stuff. I'll tell you what didn't hold up.

18:10Keyzie:I went and re-watched 1984.

18:12Jase:Oh. As I said I was going to do. Yeah.

18:15Keyzie:And look, she's as grim as. It's a very grim, you know, a very relevant movie for our times, but very grim. We got about a third of the way through it, and I said to my wife, you're hating this, aren't you? And she said, yeah, I'm not really into it. And I said, well, let's watch something else then. And she was like, no, no. and you might as well finish it. And I watched it to the end. There's some very good performances. John Hurt is very, very good in this movie, but it is grim as, if you're not going to be cheered up, this is not the movie for you. I'll give it two buzies.

18:52Jase:Right. Okay? That's a shame because in your memory, how many buzies did it have?

18:56Keyzie:In my memory, it was like a three and a half, four buzies. Wow. You know what I mean? That'd be more like in your memory. Because of the...

19:06Fellas, you want to know what I watched last night? Yes, please. So my wife and I, there's a couple of reality shows that we like. One of them, guys, one of them is Celebrity Traders UK. Yes. Can't wait for that to come back again. Oh, I can't wait, man. The other one is The Australian Amazing Race with the Celebs. So there's a woman on The Amazing Race Australia, Celebrity Edition. Her name's Aisha. She's on Below Deck. She's a Kiwi. Oh, yeah. And she grew up in Tauranga like I did, and we worked at the same fruit shop together. Oh, right. She's gone on to be very, very successful and famous through this reality show, and she's on it.

19:40So I wanted to watch it and support her. She's quite funny. And then there's also an AFL legend, Brendan Favona, I think. Yeah, yeah. Fav. Favona. Favona, very well-known Aussie bloke.

19:51Jase:Oh, he's kind of a cropper, isn't he? Good, very funny personality. He's on there with his daughter. There's also, out of the many couples that are involved, two brothers. You're not going to mention the gay guys, are you? Luke and Sassy Scott. Sassy Scott, very funny. And he's very funny on TikTok and Instagram. I'd never heard of him. Very, very funny. Very, very funny. Super over-the-top energetic, and he's just being himself. Also, do you remember Ant Middleton? He was like a UK former SAS guy who used to host reality shows.

20:22Keyzie:No. The name is familiar, yes. So he's on it with his brother. They win the first episode. And then at the start of the second episode, Bo Ryan, who's hosting it, goes, Ant Middleton and his brother have been eliminated for breaching protocols and standards.

20:35Jase:Yeah. We're instantly like, what the heck? Turns out that his brother got steamed one night after the first episode, said heaps of homophobic stuff to Sassy Scott, who's very, very entertaining. And then Brendan Favina basically says - Favola. Favola. Yeah. Pagola? Favola, yeah. He basically said, if you don't axe those two guys and get rid of them, I'm leaving the show with my daughter. Yeah. So I was like, what? Yeah. And it's really, really entertaining. I love the show, but I was like, oh, good on him for sticking up for them.

21:04Keyzie:Bloody good stuff. I don't know what it is about shows where comedians or celebrities are in it. It just doesn't do it for me. Oh, you shouldn't watch Talkback then. No, well, you see, that's a quality drama slash comedy.

21:22Jase:Those two, the brothers there with Sassy Scott, it was very funny. It started out as they were just doing content, and the other brother, Luke, would just wind up his brother. And they're a bit aware of it now, and they're doing very well. So it's all a bit made up. But Early Door is very, very funny. Yeah, and it's highly recommended. If you need a show to watch with your partner, it's just like an hour and a half each week. I think they're like long episodes. We love it. TVNZ+. Because, Jase, you came up with that idea for a spin-off show called The Amazing Racist. The Hauraki Big Show with Jace, Mike and Keezy Tune in weekdays at 4 on Radio Hauraki

21:59Keyzie:Nirvana there on the Radio Hauraki Big Show this Tuesday afternoon Now listen up, plenty coming up after 5 o 'clock Including our new Reeburger competition Oh it's not a competition It is a competition Is it a competition? It's a competition

22:12Jase:Well it's not really a competition It's the fastest finger Fastest finger Which is a competition How it works is if you hear this played in the middle of a song at any time on the big show. You call us straight away 0800-HAURAKE. And if you've got the fastest fingers, Moggy, as you rightly said, you instantly get a$50 reberg about you.

22:32Keyzie:So are you saying then if it's the fastest finger, it's the first caller through? Yeah, something like that. I mean, when we did it for the first time yesterday, we picked randomly. Yeah, well, of course you pick randomly. So it doesn't matter how fast you are. Yum. Let's get boiled down in the details, Jase. That's coming up after five plus heaps of chat. But my wife wants to know whether or not she's – well, we'll get into it after five. Sounds good, man. Yeah, yeah, yeah. The Hauraki Big Show with Jace, Mike and Keezy. Tune in weekdays at four on Radio Hauraki. Welcome back, you massive backbones.

23:06Keyzie:Hope you're having a good day out there. You're listening to The Big Show brought to you by – Handcrafted burgers, loaded fries and gourmet eats that'll change the game. So, you have any New Year's resolutions? Yeah, well, look, my resolutions are, look, I've got to read more books, and I really want to learn a new skill this year. I don't know, maybe an instrument or something like that. What about you?

23:32Jase:Nothing, really. I just want to eat more re-burger. Yeah, you know, a bit more, just as much re-burger as I can. I just don't feel like I ate enough last year. You want to eat more re-burger? is your resolution, like your goals. Yeah, well, you know, they say ambitious but attainable, you know, and in Re-Burger it's crave-worthy, it's street food, and it's gourmet, but it's hand-crafted, you know what I'm saying? So, could you have a bit more of that in your life? Can't hurt, can it? Yum!

24:11Jase:The ending on that is magnificent. That surprised me, folks. That's an absolute cracker.

24:16Keyzie:If you're just joining the show, by the way, Pugs had to make amends because the one earlier on in the day was a shocker. That was shit. That's the worst one he's ever made. But that one, that one was a worthy contender for Sting of the Year.

24:29Jase:Sting of the Year, is that a thing? Can we put a circle around that for Sting of the Year? Actually, why aren't we doing awards at the end of the year? What are we doing? Yeah, exactly. Sting of the Year. Write that down, Casey. Okay, Sting of the Year. Yeah, just read it. Do you reckon I could maybe win it with what's on the dinner? Yes. How do I put forward a submission? All it takes is for one of us to hear it and say That could be a finalist for the Sting of the Year

24:53Keyzie:Can I just say this We've started off in cracking form actually And I'm not trying to poke the bear here genuinely No, I know what you're going to say Yes, you are But Pugson's bird shit Chris thing yesterday

25:08Jase:Was a very, very good sting Can we hear that sting, Kesey? You got that handy?

25:15Keyzie:Bird Shit Chris It's not my name. Well, it is my name. My name's Chris. So we've got two finalists for Sting of the Year.

25:25Jase:Yeah, it's going to be a very competitive little category there. My only problem that I've got with Bird Shit Chris is that Jason and I don't have access to be able to push that button. True. It's the only one that can do it is Bird Shit Chris. And I don't think you're going to do it as often as I was. Yeah, I get that vibe too, Moke. What do you mean I've already played it four times in two days? How much do you want to play the Bird Shit Chris stick?

25:49Keyzie:Just once more? No. Now? No. Come on. Bird Shit Chris. Here's the cranberries. The Hauraki Big Show with Jase, Mike and Keezy. Tune in weekdays at four on Radio Hauraki. She-Hart there on the Radio Hauraki Big Show this wet Tuesday afternoon. The time is 13 minutes past 5 o 'clock. Sopping wet. Hey, fellas. Pug San's in the studio with us. G'day, Pug San. Hello. How are you? Yeah, good, thanks. How are you doing? You all good? Yeah, good, bro. Good stuff. The reason we've got – well, I've asked you to come in, Pugs, is because I've noticed a term popping up a lot online, and I think it's a term that the youths use.

26:37Baddy. Have you heard that term? Baddy. I've heard a lot, Kesey. Can I say that? Because I've seen, oh, he's a baddie or she's a baddie. What does that mean? It's certainly not as complicated as you think. It can have a couple of sort of variations in definition. I mean, the most prominent one being just like attractive. Someone who's hot. Someone who's really hot. So literally just that. Yeah. It's not a type of hot? It can also imply like a really good sense of style or a certain individual. Like a badass. Not really, Jase. No, no. No. It can also sort of mean like a really independent boss sort of attitude.

27:14What about an independent thinker? Is that a baddie? Not to my knowledge. Obviously a baddie could also be a bad person in a movie, a flick. I agree. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Okay, so for example, like, because I was, I sort of knew baddie meant attractive, but I thought like is baddie the same as beautiful? So like your Instagram explore page. Full of baddies. Yeah. For example, my wife, would I say, oh, man, my wife, she's a baddie? Would you say that? Well, I'd say she's beautiful. Right. Can I call her a baddie? Yeah, I mean, like what?

27:51Keyzie:What? Nothing. I was just saying when I think of your wife, I don't think she's a baddie. Thank you, yeah. She's more beautiful, like classically beautiful. I wouldn't say she's a baddie. Oh, yeah, because she gets upset by stuff. No, no, no, no. It's nothing to do with that. For example, Jase, your wife is a baddie She is a baddie You don't need to tell me that, fellas She's a massive baddie Mogi, your wife's a baddie She's a baddie Damn baddie Pugs, your partner? She's a baddie She's 100 % a baddie So it's just your wife No, my wife's beautiful So all of our wives and partners are baddies But Keezy's wife is Can I just say baddie and beautiful?

28:38She's not Jase Jase We say a lot of stuff on this show A lot of stuff And Sometimes we go too far And I think I think we might have just tiptoed Over the old threshold there What do you reckon?

29:08Jase?

29:14Why aren't you looking at me, Jase? What are you?

29:21And the worst part is this is going to be... This is going to be cut into a social clip now and put online and my wife is going to be so offended. Absolutely.

29:31Jase:100%. The only thing that could give it, you need a strong out. Oh, yeah. Can you play that Bird Shit Chris thing? Bird Shit Chris. The Hauraki Big Show with Jase, Mike and Keezy. Tune in weekdays at four on Radio Hauraki.

29:48Keyzie:Yes, indeed, live there on the Radio Hauraki Big Show this Tuesday afternoon. The time is 5.24. Yesterday, fellas, we started a brand new segment giveaway, which is basically whenever you hear this during a song, You call us straight away on 0800 Hodaki and you get yourself a$50 Reburger voucher if you get through. We've been told by Reburger to really up the amount of giveaways. Giveaways. Yeah, good. Yeah, nice. So we've done exactly that. Should we go to the lines, fellas? I think so. Should we go to the fair? We'll go to Andrew. Hi, Andrew. How are you going? Good, man. Yourself? Yeah, not too bad, man.

30:27Keyzie:Hey, Andrew, what do you do for a crust, mate? I am a telecommunications technician. Jeez.

30:33Jase:So you work in, like, you sort of work in a Westfields and you do, you know, fixer phones and stuff in there and put, like, new screens on them and that?

30:42Keyzie:Oh, yeah, something like that. You know, your phone lines, your cameras, your internet boards, that sort of stuff, mate. Oh, yeah. Yeah, that's good stuff. Nice, that's backbone stuff there, Andrew. And what's for tea tonight, man? I have no idea, mate. I'm not even home yet. Oh. Whoa. Excuse me, Andrew. Did you not sort of talk to your partner and say, you know, what are we thinking for dinner throughout the day? I do that constantly. No, something to be on the table when I get home, mate. Oh, okay. That's good, man.

31:11Jase:And in terms of, I'm just going to assume you've got a partner there, mate. How do you rate their cooking skills?

31:19Keyzie:Yes, it's my family that cook. I'm a single, ready to mingle, mate. But they're good cooks. Oh, yeah, nice. Good on you, mate. All right, Andrew. Well, I'll tell you what. you have got yourself$50 worth of Reburger, mate. Sweet as. That's your lunch, eh, boy? Yeah, you go, fella.

31:35Jase:That's good eating. That is really good eating. I really want to get to know these callers better. I feel like we should come up with sort of maybe five questions to get to know them, you know? Okay, well, so the first question is what do you do for a crust? Always what do you do for a crust. Yes. And then we've got four more after that. 3483, feel free to suggest some questions, and we'll do that every time someone calls up going forward. Matt and Jerry used to ask that question, do you trim your downstairs? Remember that one? Oh, yeah. I'm not saying that it's relevant, but that's the kind of areas we need to be getting into because it does define a person, that sort of thing.

32:06Jase:Yeah, well, actually, I need to get back to that.

32:07Keyzie:What, trimming you downstairs? Yeah, I haven't done that since March last year. The Hauraki Big Show with Jace, Mike and Kesey. Tune in weekdays at four on Radio Hauraki. Everclear there on the Radio Hauraki Big Show this Tuesday afternoon. The time is 5.34 for those of you that are interested. He said, hey, fellas, I haven't announced it on the radio yet, but old Hoody J is moving. Oh, wow. Isn't that exciting? That is exciting, man. You'll recall that at the end of last year, my wife and I were looking for a place. Yes. In the CBD. That's right, because you've lived in the same area of West Auckland in a big bungalow house.

32:49Yes. You call it the site, eh? The section. The section, and it's just massively overgrown and old and dilapidated, but huge property. It is. You've decided to move into an apartment in Auckland CBD to get amongst the city life. Yeah, totally, man.

33:04Keyzie:Well, I mean, and I'm very much looking forward to it, and I have full intentions of cleaning this CBD up a little bit, but we'll see how we go on that front. But the reason I'm bringing it up now is because, and we talked about this end of last year, I think, you know, what to chuck and what to keep. We were talking about our kids' stuff and all that sort of stuff. And as you can imagine, living in the same house for 26 years, there's a fair amount of crap. Yeah, right. You know what I mean? And, you know, I'm not having a go at my wife here, but she likes her op shops. She likes her second-hand stores and all that sort of stuff, you know.

33:40Keyzie:So there is a lot of crap to pack up. Don't have a go at your wife. She's pretty solid.

33:47Jase:You're saying that there's that many couriers that come round to your house that your wife actually gets the courier's Christmas presents and stuff. Yes, she does. Yes, she knows them that well. A bottle of whiskey. Does she get those presents delivered? What present? Yes, she does. Jeez, that's confusing, isn't it? Yes. Right.

34:05Keyzie:But here's my dilemma, okay, what to chuck out and what not to chuck out. But also, you know, there's only the two of us there. My daughter's out and about and stuff. And, jeez, packing all that stuff up is a whore of a job. Is it? And I'm thinking, you know, Mogi, you've moved quite a lot in your life. You're an old pro at that. I am. Keesey, you're a very practical man in terms of, you know, space and this will fit in nicely. I'm practical in terms of space and fitting things in nicely. You know what I mean? That is the biggest yarn I've ever heard. I can see you like all this stuff on the ground and you going.

34:36Keyzie:You can pick it up. You put this here and put that in there and that'll work. So I'm wondering if you two and old Pugsang can help me pack my house up and then on the day help me move all the heavy stuff.

34:47Jase:Oh, man.

34:48Keyzie:Your beds, your couches, your refrigerators.

34:53Jase:I would love to, man, but this is a real clash with my New Year's resolution, which is not to help friends at all, ever. Okay, yeah. So I can't. I'd love to, but I can't break my New Year's resolution. I'm just happy to know we're friends. I was going to say, is there anything in there about colleagues? Colleagues? No, well, this is a different sort of, yeah. I mean, I'm very close with Jase's wife. It just feels like I'd be helping her. Yeah, yeah.

35:23Keyzie:Keezy, how are you, place? I'll have to talk to my wife. Yes. And just say, hey, you know the guy who gave you a spray on the radio the other day? I did not give her a spray. And pretty much said you were ugly. I love your wife, Keezy. Okay, now you've gone too far the other way. Yeah, he wants us to help him move. We'll just see what she says. Yeah, I tell you what, you know, it's a barter type arrangement. Who knows what the future holds for Keezy? I might be able to, or my wife might be able to help you out somehow. You know what I mean? In what way? Wow. What are you offering here? Just, you know, a full Keezy.

36:03Keyzie:You know, there's maybe a little Keezy running around one day. Oh. As in babysitting? Yeah. Oh, okay.

36:13Keyzie:But actually, can you put the music back on? Because you're giving me another idea here. I mean, my wife and I were talking last night, actually, about, you know, taking risks. Oh. Getting outside our comfort zones. If you mentioned my wife here and not me, I would be fuming. And, you know, I don't know if you guys have ever had that conversation with your partners, getting outside your comfort zones there. What are you doing? You're chucking the frangers away. Trying different things I know what you should do when it comes to moving With your house Yes skeezy Honestly just turn around And throw the lighter over your shoulder And just burn it Well we can't do that Because we're renting it out But if you guys could help me move I'd appreciate it greatly Keen as The Hauraki Big Show weekdays from four on Radio Hauraki.

37:18Keyzie:It's a big queens of the stone age there on the Radio Hauraki. Big show this Tuesday afternoon. The time, 5.47. That's right. We've got a brand new Backbone T-shirt available. Fearless. We sure do. It was designed by one fantastic listener, and now Mr. Vintage actually has it up at their website, mrvintage.co.nz. We gave a whole heap of them out over the weekend at the Black Clash there and at the live show we did. If you're keen to buy one, as I said, mrvintage.co.nz. However, we've got a fresh shipment to give away. and we'll start giving those away tomorrow on the show. That's exciting. How good.

37:48Keyzie:Actually, someone actually, when I tore it off my body on Friday afternoon, wanted my T-shirt. Oh, that's right. Yeah, which I sort of thought was a bit weird. It is a bit weird. You know what I mean? Did you – you know, the older I get, right, when it comes to fashion, speaking of backbone teas, do you remember last year when I basically said that normalising wearing a bib while eating should be a thing? Yes. because you eat spicy noodles or soup or curry or something and if you drop something back into your plate, it'll splash all over your nice shirt. Wear a bib. I don't want to look like a freak if I take my own bib to a restaurant.

38:24I've come up with another fashion idea. I think, I don't know the name of it, so I'm going to call it what I think it's called, which is a bum gusset. Yes, yes. I think all pants should have a bum gusset. What is a gusset? Isn't a gusset the thing that you open up? Like on the - Trap door. Like a trap door.

38:46Jase:Yeah, I know the ones. You know what I mean? I think pants aren't convenient enough. You generally see them in an old western and there's a fella coming out of an outhouse and he's sort of wearing things, pyjamas that men would wear in winter. What are those called? It's a one suit, but it had the trap door on the back, the button out. Like a onesie or something. Oh, yeah, yeah. I know what you're saying. So you can drop a steamer at the middle of the night. Yeah, just pull it apart. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Like imagine if all our undies and stuff, because your male undies have, Quite a lot of them have a front gusset thing.

39:15Jase:It's more trouble than it's worth, though, that, isn't it? Yeah, it is. But, you know, I think if we came up with a good design for a bum gusset as well. So you could, you know.

39:24Keyzie:Are you thinking, can I just say, incidentally, I was a big fan of the man bib. Yeah, right. I do that all the time. My wife will buy me a nice secondhand shirt and I'll do a bit of cooking and I'll eat like spicy noodles, immediately oil stains all over the shirt. All over the lemon shirt. It's not good. but are we thinking like waist down or like Mogi suggested in the old westerns where it's a full body suit? Well, I just think all pants. All pants, okay. From here on out, all the people that make pants just agree, okay, from now on, all pants have a gusset.

39:56Jase:Is this a similar thing to why you wanted the bib because you're worried about the splash back? What problem are we solving would be my question because I haven't identified a problem here. When I need to go to the toilet, I take my undies down and put them down by my knees there. Yeah. That's not a big effort for me. Reaching around and having to undo buttons or something like that, to me, is more of an effort than pulling down my undies. Do you take your undies off, do you? No, not off, just down. I think the gusset only would work in a one-piece, like a ski suit. Or a leotard. Something like that where you don't have to take the whole thing off.

40:31Jase:But undies are so easy.

40:32Keyzie:Or you've had a massive bowl of really spicy noodles. So you've got your bib on. And you've got your bib on. Yeah. And then suddenly you're like, oh, hello. clear the way I've got to pull the gusset and that could be a new phrase I've got to go pull the gusset the more I talk about these ideas in mine the more it makes me think I want to be like back into wearing clothes that I wore when I was a baby you know easily accessible so you can change the diaper and stuff like that I just think more convenient clothing like that but I think we get used to unzipping the gusset

41:06Jase:yeah I think that's my question there I'm not sure it is I think reaching around and doing something, I think that's a new thing. Do you reach around, do you? I would say if you had a string on it that you just pulled and it went up like a drape. That would be the easy, because I'm just pulling that up. It's on my hip. I grab that handle and I pull it up, and up it goes like a drape. That's easy. Like the curtains on a stage show rising. That's right, yes. And then the show happens. The show's over. And the show's over, it goes down. That's right. Yeah, yeah. See, now we're talking. So if we could normalise that.

41:39Yes. I reckon that'd be great.

41:40Jase:If you could make some of those, man. Me? Actually, Jase, your wife, doesn't she? She's good with a needle, isn't she? A needle and a thread. She is very handy. I've heard she's bloody solid. The Hauraki Big Show with Jase, Mike and Keezy. Tune in weekdays at four on Radio Hauraki.

41:58Keyzie:Green day there on the Radio Hauraki Big Show this Tuesday afternoon. The time, my God, it's five to six, fellas. Fellas. Hey, coming up after six, Mogi's given his kid a new kitten, and we need to find a name for it.

42:13Jase:We really do. Look, it's white. It's a rag doll for what it's worth. It's got ashy extremities, so paws, tail, nose and ears. It's got really, really blue eyes. You could lose yourself in those eyes, Kesey. Wow. The cat's lost itself in those eyes. It's thick as shit. It's massively in breed. Yeah, it's got a lot of character. I'll say that for it. It's going to be a cool cat to have. Very, very cute. But I'm not sure there's a lot going on in the old skull there. So, yeah, I need a name. I need a name. Any help, any help appreciated. This will be a binding referendum. We'll probably get finalists, run the finalists tomorrow.

42:50Jase:And the end of tomorrow's show, we're going to have a new name. And just a reminder, the last time we did this was for Hoorijay. Got a cat last year, and that cat is now named... Jizz. So 3483, send your ideas through. and every text on 3483 in the draw for a$50 Reburger voucher.

43:10The Hauraki Big Show with Jace, Mike and Keezy. Tune in weekdays at 4 on Radio Hauraki.

43:16Keyzie:Welcome back, you massive backbones. Hope your Tuesday's going along nicely. And maybe you're settled at home having a nice cup of tea or a cold beersy. You're listening to The Big Show, by the way, brought to you by Reburg Year. Serving good times and good food. Dine-in or takeaway Reburg Year today. Yum. How good? So good. Pretty good. I actually ate quite a lot of Reeburger over the summer holidays there, fellas. I'm not afraid to admit it. I didn't eat much at all, actually. I had trouble not eating Reeburger over the holidays. Yeah? Yeah. At an actual point, an actual fact, at one point, my wife said to me, maybe just give the old Reeburger a bit of a break there.

44:00Keyzie:You know, hoity-jay? Yeah. What did you say? Not on your nelly, love. Yeah, nice. Good on you, man. Yeah, yeah. Went straight into Reburger. Put my foot down and went, no way, sirree, Bob. That's good stuff, Jase. Hey, maybe you've had Reburger. Text us 3483. We'll definitely read those. We'll definitely read those. Definitely, yeah. 3483, let us know. Coming up next, Moggy's cat needs a name. A lot of great suggestions coming through on 3483. I've kind of circled all the best options. Can you do that on the computer, can you? Yeah, you can circle the best options. Right, okay. On the computer there.

44:36So keep them coming, 3483, and you can win yourself a Reburger voucher, so it's worth doing. How good. Muse?

44:45Keyzie:Yeah, okay. The Hauraki Big Show, weekdays from four on Radio Hauraki. Velvet Revolver there on the Radio Hauraki Big Show this Tuesday evening, and Mogi's little kitten needs a name.

44:59Jase:Really does. We've got a 10-week-old, it's called a rag doll. They're known to be a very placid sort of a cat. Great pets, not big roamers. So that's great. Very, very cute. Very white. My daughter absolutely loves this cat, but we cannot agree on a name. Yes. Cannot. Has she suggested any names yet? Yes, she has. She has. But they're sort of, they're just not quite right, like butterfly. and there's all sorts of stuff that we've sort of had to talk her out of. Naming her after another animal. Yeah. Confusing. There's different sorts of things like that. There's names that appeal to her, and so she'll sort of chuck that in there.

45:39Jase:Ice cream. But even for her, she hasn't been stoked about any of them either. She hasn't been like, no, it's got to be this. Yeah, it's definitely this dad. So I've said tomorrow is the deadline where, you know, you've had long enough now. You've had it since the 2nd of January. Time's up over two weeks. Yes. So I told her the audience for the Horeki Big Show is going to be the ones to decide. That's right. So many great suggestions have come through, whether it's Spoof, Butters, Xbox 360, Cracker.

46:08Keyzie:Yes. Yeah, Cracker's pretty good. Yes. I like it because it can be good. You know, your daughter's outside looking for Cracker and just gelling it out. Cracker. I reckon that's funny. Yeah. Bruce, spunk, nips. Snowy, a bit boring.

46:26Jase:Yeah, Snowys. Snowy's not it. Snowy, I think, was one of the suggestions that my daughter had.

46:32Keyzie:I was going to say it's a sort of suggestion. Snowball. A five - or six-year-old would have. Yeah. Drongo.

46:38Jase:Drongo's not bad. Yeah, I like Drongo. Drongo. Booger sugar? Booger sugar, yeah. The whiteness, yeah, I get that. What is booger sugar? Cocaine. Oh, wow. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yield. Wow. Major Tom. Durry. Durry. Durry. Old Meowgy. Baps. Mike's new kitten should be called Pubes. Pubes. That's not it. That doesn't really. I mean, it's got ashy sort of paws, et cetera, but I don't know about Puse. Puse doesn't roll off the tongue. No, not at all. Not in my experience. Smudge. Smudge. I like Smudge. My childhood cat was called Smudge. Yeah, so it's a bit common. Is it? Smudge. Oh. Birdshit Chris. Yes, that's it.

47:26No, we're not naming it. I'm just going to stop you there, Keezy. No, we're not naming your cat Birdshit Chris.

47:30Jase:Outside of the Chris part. Outside of the Chris part. Just Birdshit. Birdshit is white and it's got the black bits. Now, this cat has got the ashy, the dark extremities, the feet, the nose, the ears, and the tail. So it kind of has that going on. it's got a connection to the show Birdshit Chris Right, but it won't be called Birdshit Chris and it'll have your last name so it'll be Birdshit Minogue I quite like the sound of that Pugs, can you make a Birdshit Minogue sting? Birdshit Chris Minogue I don't know, I think just Birdshit Chris because it's got that familiarity I think that one is a finalist anyway because we're going to have the vote tomorrow so there's Birdshit Chris and haven't we got Moggy Minogue Can I just put it out there

48:13Keyzie:if Birdshed Chris is a finalist let's not bother with anything else and if it's not a finalist if we're putting it to the listeners let's just not even bother it's just like when we had jizz as one of the options I knew it was done and dusted alright The Hauraki Big Show weekdays from 4 on Radio Hauraki Tenacious D there on the Radio Hauraki Big Show this blustery, wet, moist Tuesday evening. Now, to all of you who have hopefully been paying attention, we are giving away the most magnificent boat with$75 ,000. And all you have to do is text 3483 and name our boat. That's right. What do you text to 3483?

49:03Boat. Text the word boat to 3483. Get yourself in the drawer. What is the boat, Keezy? Oh, good question, Moggy.

49:10Jase:Yeah, can you say it with, you know, Look at Woody Jizz in the face there. Look at him in the face. And rattle off what this is because you know this. You know what this is. Jase, it's amazing. I couldn't tell you what this boat is in a million years. I've heard it just as many times as Keezy. Watch this, mate. It's amazing. This guy is a radio pro.

49:29Keyzie:Go, Keezy. Hit me. Jase, it's a Finchaser 535. Can you not blink so much? I have to to sort of give myself like a break from staring at you, even just a tiny break. Okay, start again. Fin Chaser 535 Centre Console with a 60-horse Mercury 4-stroke outboard Voyager trailer.

49:46Jase:Pretty good. What do you mean pretty good? It's not bad. That's effing excellent. Voyager trailer. I couldn't even remember that. I forgot about the trailer. To be fair, I've been at Hodaki for a while and we've given away a few boats. Yeah. They've all been a sort of a variant of the Fin Chaser Centre Console boat. It's a real peek behind the curtain here about how Keezy works.

50:03Keyzie:I mean, I've been here for longer than you and we've given away a lot of boats, but I couldn't do that.

50:08Jase:Nah.

50:09Keyzie:You know what I'm saying? It's not one of your skills.

50:10Jase:It's not. You either know how to do admin or you don't.

50:14Keyzie:I don't get involved in the sort of murky depths of your technicalities. It's not about technicalities. It's about wanting to do a good job.

50:22Jase:Oh, okay. Yeah, you got me there. Hey, so as you mentioned, if you do text BOAT to 3483, you get yourself in the drawer to win this$75 ,000 package. All you have to do is name it. So we'll send you back a form. You fill it out. You put the name you want the boat to be called. and if you win it will be written on the side. What kind of name would you do though? Well, here's a small selection. And by the way, the amount of entries after the Black Clash went through the roof. Wow. So we've got heaps of fresh names coming in. How about this one, fellas? Snapper Lurking. Snapper Lurking. Is that a play on words or does that just mean there's some fish out there?

50:59No, it's just like Snapper Lurking.

51:01Jase:If we're doing it based on the name, that one doesn't win. No, it's just a lucky dip. Oh, yeah, yeah. That's terrible. Oh.

51:08Keyzie:Remember that one we saw on the way back from Tauranga Mogi? Fake news. Oh, that's right. Fake news. I really want to meet that guy. That guy was a weapon. Fin and tonic. That's quite good. I see what he's done there. Yeah, yeah. That's clever. What about this one? Weekend hooker. Weekend hooker. Oh. Because you're hooking fish in the weekend.

51:31Jase:That's sort of a play on words with hooker.

51:32Keyzie:Yeah, well, you couldn't go out during the weekdays then, could you? No. I guess not. What about vitamin C, but C is spelled S-E-A? Vitamin C. Yeah. It's actually quite clever. I like that one. I suppose you prefer getting D.

51:49Are there any other ones here, Casey? Yeah, there's heaps. Any fin is possible. Smoking Real, Ship-Faced, Aqua Therapy, Barry. Barry's good. The Flounder Pounder. All of these are great.

52:04Jase:I like the Flounder Pounder.

52:05Keyzie:Yeah, but the only problem is you don't go on a boat to get flounder.

52:08Jase:No, no, he's had a shocker there. You know what I'm saying?

52:10Keyzie:He wasn't a pound flounder either. Well, you do. I mean, if you're gaffing them.

52:14Jase:If you're another flounder, you're a pounder flounder. Yeah, that's right.

52:17Keyzie:Have you ever seen a flounder pounder flounder? It's good eating. Boat 3483, get to texting. The Hauraki Big Show with Jace, Mike and Kesey. Tune in weekdays at 4 on Radio Hauraki.

52:40Keyzie:Well, there you go, you mad bastards. That's the big show done and dusted for your Tuesday afternoon. We got a nice and early today, specifically so we could do the podcast outro, didn't we, fellas? We love it. Because we know how much you love the podcast outro, so we wanted to really hoe in today. We love it too.

52:58Jase:I love it too. What did we talk about today? Because it's one of those things that I can never remember. We got enmeshed in... I'm trying to remember... Do you want me just to play a clip? Okay, yeah, let's play the clip. Yeah, it's about the gym. You have to give them probably a month in advance, was it?

53:17Keyzie:Well, that's what they said. So I went in there and I said, yeah, g'day. And they recognised me because I'm a bit of a radio star. They know who I am. Oh, of course they do. And they recognised me in the woman behind the counter. What is she? I beg your pardon, Casey.

53:31Jase:Just rewind that 15 seconds and you'll distinctly be able to hear Jase mouthing the words

53:35Keyzie:Oh come on you guys Come on man What were you saying there Jase? That was really kind of weird. No well what actually happened was I'd gone in there to cancel my subscription to the gym Kesey and as I was telling that tale I had a bit of Nicorette in the side of my mouth and a bit of spittle went into my throat and I had to pause. Oh right. And then you fellas tried to throw me under the bus Right well you have to listen to the podcast outro at 7.30 when it comes out I guess Hey, well, the good news is we've done two so far and there's been no disclaimers. That's true. That's good for us. We're flying.

54:09That's really good.

54:10Jase:Hey, Moggy, what are you doing tonight? I'm going to the gym. Okay, good. I'm going straight to the gym. I wasn't sure if I was going to go to the gym, but I still feel good, so I'm going to go to the gym. And then I've got a little bit of work to do, fellas. Yeah, good stuff. Good stuff. Hey, Keezy, what are you having for tea, man? Pasta. Like a basil pasta with bacon and veggies. Oh, basil. is that basil faulty or basil brush basil faulty yeah yeah nice so that's what I'll be doing and then my wife and I are going to watch a new sitcom we've been watching but I'll talk about that tomorrow Jase what are you doing tonight man well look

54:46Keyzie:I think I'll get home and funnily enough you had a fish curry for dinner last night Kesey that's what we're having we're not copying you by the way you know even though actually I still want your butter chicken recipe I'll get in touch with your wife yeah yeah see how that goes see how that goes for you after today's radio show it'll go well we get on really well yeah you did yeah yeah yeah have dinner you know chat probably do some more packing nice man sounds fun yeah thanks sounds like a real fun time hey check out the Instagram check out the podcast till tomorrow see you later bye

55:32World Warfare