FULL SHOW: Bird Special

11:37Keyzie:We're not barbarians. No. Put a little water fountain in there for them? Wow, a water cooler or something like that. What, like an office one? Yes.

11:46Mike Minogue:Feeding a meat-based diet is required. Whole prey items where possible, including the skin and the bones. But now you're getting into, it's got nothing to do with us. We're building the enclosure. We're not feeding them. I don't work at the zoo. Exactly. Now I'm working at the zoo? I've got no interest. Yeah, okay, fair enough. Actually, someone's got a question here about the lions being afraid of lines. Yeah. Why do they like eating zebra? Well, that's a vertical line. That's a standing up line. Yeah. These lines I'm talking about, they're on the ground. Okay. They're terrified of the horizontal line, the vertical line, drives them insane.

12:21They get murderous.

12:22Mike Minogue:The Hauraki Big Show, weekdays from four on Radio Hauraki. I think I'll have myself a beer. Big Show. The Radio Hodaki Big Show. Name our beer.

12:37Keyzie:Yeah, baby. We need your help, New Zealand. What kind of beer is it, Keezy? I can't remember. Hazy.

12:43Mike Minogue:Hazy. Tropical Hazy Pale Ale. Yes, nice. It's got all the fruits in it, doesn't it, Keezy? Bit of pineapple. Yeah.

12:49Keyzie:Bit of kiwi fruit.

12:50Mike Minogue:Tomato.

12:52Keyzie:Persimmon. Pumpkin. Tamarillo. Fig. Date.

12:57Mike Minogue:Oh, yum. Made by the geniuses at Emerson's. It's to celebrate the Dunedin Bear Festival, which is back once again Friday, November 27th, and Saturday, November 28th down at Forsyth Bar Stadium. We'll be down there if you're keen to head along to dunedinbearfestible.co.nz. But in the meantime, if you are keen for a brand new Emerson's hoodie, they are beautiful, thick, high-quality numbers, all you have to do is text 3483. Let us know what you would name this brand new bear of ours. Text flooding in there. Fellas, people are keen to stay warm, obviously.

13:28Keyzie:Yeah, well, Dunedin is cold. You know, we're going to be down there. Even at summertime, she's a bit nippy.

13:34Mike Minogue:She is a bit nippy. Three Brothers Beak has come in from Hayden. Triple Honk of Beer. We had Three Honkers Hazy the other day. Yeah, quite like that one. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. So a lot of good suggestions. Keep them coming. Three, four, eight, three. Let's go to the lines.

13:47Keyzie:G'day, Geordie, you mad bastard. How's life?

13:50Mike Minogue:Hey, how's it going, mate?

13:51Keyzie:Yeah, good, thanks, mate. You having a good day, Geordie? Yeah, it's been a splendid day, eh? Yeah. Yeah, blended. Good on you, mate. Thanks for asking, man. Pretty good. Have you got a name for us?

14:02Mike Minogue:Oh, yeah. I was going to run this for you.

14:06Keyzie:Keezy Steam running on one leg with me, Keezy.

14:10Mike Minogue:Yeah, right. Okay. Yeah, I like it. I like it. Of course you do. Running on one leg. Is that because I got injured over a year ago there, Jordy? I might have had something to do with that. Yeah, yeah. That's the thing. That's good, man. That's top two for me. Is it? Yeah. I'm real surprised. So far. Good on you, Jordy. You've got yourself in Emerson's hoodie, mate. You hold the line, all right? So easy, champs, Ellen. Brilliant. Good on you, mate. Jeez, people have got a great imagination. What was it again? Keezy pissed up on one leg. Yeah, Keezy pissed up on one leg. Yeah, that's the one.

14:38Keyzie:And they have great memories, too. They do. That was over a year ago now. They don't let you forget, do they? No, they certainly don't. G'day, Adam, you mad bastard. How's life? Yeah, not bad, you tell, boys. Yeah, good thanks, mate. How's a beautiful welly today?

14:54Mike Minogue:Oh, mate, sun's out and you can't beat Wellington on a good day, eh?

14:58Keyzie:Oh, yeah. Bloody Oats, mate. That's so true, man. Bloody Oats. If you go anywhere else on a good day. Oh, yeah, yeah. Yeah, because it's garbage. Pretty much anywhere else. Anywhere. I mean, anywhere. Adam, have you got a name for us, mate?

15:10Mike Minogue:I sure do. I reckon it should be Big Bear for Big Boys.

15:14Keyzie:I like that. Big Bear for Big Boys.

15:16Mike Minogue:Yeah, put it on a big black 440ml can. Yeah. Do like the number four. Do it in your haodaki yellow. Yeah. Get that beer down my gut. Big beer for big boys. I like it. I do like it. That's good shit, mate. You hold the line. You've got yourself an Emerson's hoodie as well, mate. Awesome. Appreciate it, boys. No worries, man. I love you, man. You have a good one. I love you too.

15:36Keyzie:I've got to say, my favourite is still the three honkers hazy. Right. That's pretty good. What about Keezy's one there? Yeah, that was good too. It's up there. No shit.

15:46Mike Minogue:Three men and a little hazy. Honker, stonker. Pigeon. Pigeon Chris Hazy Vision JizzBot's Jungle Juice Bird Shit Hazy Bird Shit Hazy's got a ring to it Yeah it does Come drink with The Philz So lots of great suggestions coming through Keep them coming 3483 We've got more Emerson's hoodies to flick out And don't forget if you want to head along to the Dunedin Beer Festival DunedinBearFestival.co.nz Not only will there be over 75 beer, food and beverage vendors. Shapeshifter will be there. Troy Kingy, Red Fountain Park Road as well. It's going to be great.

16:26Keyzie:It's going to be awesome, man. Hey, here's Nirvana.

16:30Mike Minogue:The Hauraki Big Show. Weekdays from four on Radio Hauraki.

16:35Keyzie:Queens of the Stone Age there on the Hauraki Big Show this Tuesday afternoon. The time is 4.51. Fellas, let's talk TV. What's on the telly with Mike Minogue?

16:51Yeah!

16:52Keyzie:That's right. Whoa. Fellas, last night I watched a final episode in the third season of the show called Alone. Yeah. Alone. Alone is a story about you take ten people and you throw them in the wilderness. In this case, it's Tasmania, which is in Australia. Is it? Yeah. Oh, Tassie. The old Tassie there. And it was bloody good right from the start. But obviously it's cold and you have to build your own shelter. You have to find your own food. You've got very limited resources. You've got about 70 kilos apparently worth of camera gear. You've got to film yourself the whole time, which will get really bloody annoying.

17:31Yeah, be a massive ball, mate.

17:33Keyzie:Can you imagine me? No footage available. Anyway, at the start of it, there was a couple of fellas that I really liked. One was a guy called Muzza, who was an Australian fellow there. He was a bushman. He was described as Keezy. And he used to go around and cull kangaroos was one of the things he'd done in his life. And then he was 63, the oldest contestant I've ever had on a loan. And the other guy I really liked was a guy called Shea, who was a possum trapper from New Zealand. Worked in the Uruweras, apparently. Yes. From the time he was 16, he went up into the bush and just did it for four years, just went and trapped possums by himself.

18:12Excuse me. Anyway, we finally got to the end of it last night And it got down to three people And these guys were two of the final three And I'm bloody thrilled with the result It is a hell of a show It is absolute five buzzies out of a possible five The things that people can do It's a really inspiring thing I watched it with my daughter She loved it I had tears of joy and tears of sadness in that final episode That's how good it was absolutely amazing. Brilliant, brilliant show. You've seen it, Jase.

18:45Keyzie:Yeah, man. Alone, TVNZ+. I give it five buzzies too. It's one of those shows that it becomes addictive very quickly. I loved it. Five buzzies. Yeah, five buzzies. Get into it. This is, as I say, season three. They're in Tasmania. Won't spoil it, but jeez, God. Just brilliant television. Brilliant television. Yes. Brilliant. Shea, I think the Kiwi fella is one of the most likeable men you'll ever see on television. He is one of the greatest New Zealanders and human beings to ever walk this earth of ours. Yes. Unshakeable. Keeps his sense of humour. Low key. Deadpan. Yes. Incredibly highly skilled.

19:28Tenacious. Just a never give up attitude. You're going to have to drag me out of here. Just everything you want to be in a person, this guy is. He's completely understated. No vanity about him. No. If anything, hates the spotlight, very modest. I can't speak highly enough of that bloke or that show.

19:45Keyzie:Just incredible. Fellas, I had a very lazy TV night last night, so we watched one of those sort of murder documentaries where the husband's a piece of shit, basically murders his wife, steals all her money, and then you find out he did that to his previous wife as well. So, you know, just your normal kind of doco viewing. I give it 2.5 buzzies out of 5. What was it called? I don't know.

20:09Mike Minogue:Where did you watch it?

20:10Keyzie:Sounds like Netflix Yeah it was Netflix It was Netflix Yes

20:15Mike Minogue:Watch the season finale Of the first season Of Our Age's Fortune Great finale Great show Yes I won't bang on about Too much though But highly recommend How many buzzies? I've been giving it Like 4.2 buzzies The whole time That finale I was expecting A five buzzie finale It was about A four and a half Buzzie finale That's pretty good Because one of the things I predicted I was like I reckon this This and this Is going to happen I didn't So I was surprised which is always good. Really love the characters. Love Grandad. Because they've got the Grandad living with him and he sort of goes in and out of having dementia and things aren't real, but he's still very onto it in certain spaces.

20:51Mike Minogue:Yes. Like all the characters. And my wife has got an interesting new crush from the show as well. Oh, good. But maybe we can talk about that later.

20:58Keyzie:My wife had a crush on that show as well. Yeah. And then she married him.

21:04Mike Minogue:Oh, because you were in that show, eh?

21:06Keyzie:Hey, coming up after five o 'clock, we have a bit of a pigeon update. Yeah. Also, fellas, I'm a little bit worried about my career and I need your advice on some stuff. You got it, man.

21:18Mike Minogue:The Hauraki Big Show with Jase, Mike and Keezy. Tune in weekdays at four on Radio Hauraki.

21:24Keyzie:Welcome back, you massive backbones. Hope your Tuesday's going along tickety-boo. You are listening to The Big Show, brought to you by ReBurger.

21:32Mike Minogue:Handcrafted burgers, loaded fries and gourmet eats that'll change the game.

21:37Keyzie:We're going to need a bigger burger. Yum, yum, yum, yum, yum.

21:46Keyzie:Too good.

21:47Mike Minogue:Hey, fellas, exciting news. RE, the Warriors. Tickets went on sale today for the home final.

21:52Keyzie:Wow.

21:53Mike Minogue:12 p.m. Bloody hard to get tickets, it was.

21:56Keyzie:Tell me about it. But if you missed out, tomorrow on the show,

21:59Mike Minogue:we're going to have some to give away. What? Okay, so just listen to the old big show there. Get ready to call 0800-HODAKI.

22:06Keyzie:I was on my phone all AVO, just effing and jeffing. Man, just so far down the queue, I couldn't believe it. All AVO? All AVO, man. I still haven't got any tickets. Damn. Wow.

22:18Mike Minogue:Just crap, man. Did you get tickets, Moggy? Yeah, I got heaps. I got heaps of tickets. I put mine in the bin, most of them. So you printed them out and put them in the bin. You still got them, though, on your phone? No, no, no, no. I'm not going to use them. I'm going to go down to a local pub. Yeah, right. And watch it so I can sort of effing jeff a bit. The trouble I find when you're at the stadium is if things aren't going your way, you can't throw the chairs around because they're bolted down to the concrete. So I want to be in a pub where I can pick up a chair and throw it against a wall or smash a TV or whatever.

22:49Yeah, fair enough.

22:50Keyzie:That's why you want to get in the corporate boxes, Moggy. Oh, 100%. You know what I mean? Because they've got undetached chairs. Yes. Detached chairs. Yeah, detached, I mean. Not undetached. Yeah. Unattached.

23:03Mike Minogue:They're just chairs. They've just got cheers. Yes. Yeah, good stuff. Cheers.

23:09Keyzie:Oh.

23:12Mike Minogue:Here's She-Hart. The Hauraki Big Show. Weekdays from four on Radio Hauraki.

23:17Keyzie:Yes, indeed. Head like a hole on the Hauraki Big Show this Tuesday afternoon. The time is 13 minutes past five o 'clock. And, fellas, I've got a few concerns. And I'm hoping that, you know, you guys being my buds, my buddies, you might be able to reassure me because I'm worried that my star is fading. Is it waning? Yeah, waning. It's probably a better word, Moggy.

23:43Mike Minogue:What do you mean by that? Like you're –

23:45Keyzie:Well, you know, there's a lot of people out there obviously that look upon me as a bit of a legend. You know, top radio DJ, massively successful actor. Award winning. Award winning. Oh, really? That's Moggy. No, that's Moggy. That's Moggy, sorry. Yeah, no, that was Moggy. I'm sure I probably have won an award, but I don't pay attention to that sort of stuff. You know what I mean? Top quality voice artist. But something happened just recently that really shook me to my core. Now, you'll be aware of the fact that I've been on a very, very popular television show called Brokenwood.

24:21Mike Minogue:Oh, the Brokenwood Mysteries. Yes.

24:23Keyzie:As a regular sort of ongoing character. Oh, yeah. Ray. Ray. Rayness. Rayness. Is it Rayness or Ray? It's first name Ray, last name Ness. Oh, Rayness. It's just Ray. Well, he's got to have a last name.

24:39Mike Minogue:Surely it's Rayness.

24:40Keyzie:You know, and I've been on every series, and I think it's up to series 14 now, and when they do the series, they release the cast list, right? And by every name, there's a number. So your primary character in any show, the star of the show, if you like, is generally number one or two on the cast list. Yeah, that's right. Right, okay. He or she.

25:02Mike Minogue:Right, okay. So the main fella there, the curly-haired dude. Or woman. I'm talking about Broken Wood Mysteries. Yes. Would be the curly-haired guy. He'd be number one. Yes. And then the woman he solves all the crimes with. Kirsten. She'd be number two. Yeah, number two. And then Hoity J, you should be like top ten at least, I'm thinking.

25:20Keyzie:Well, I used to be. This is where my concern is. And it's not really a ranking. It's just sort of how popular you are and how often you sort of turn up in the series. Yeah, it's just a ranking. Yeah, it's kind of a ranking. Like a talent ranking. It's 100 % a ranking. Ray Nuss. Ray Nuss. So it is Ray Nuss. Was always ranked 10. Oh, number 10. Number 10. Top 10. On the cast list. Now, I'm about to be filming another episode in the new series.

25:51Mike Minogue:Oh, they still make it.

25:52Keyzie:And they've released the cast list. And Ray. What's his last name? Nuss is now, and I kid you not, 54. Years old? No, 54 on the list. I used to be 10.

26:10Mike Minogue:Hang on. So because I watched, well, admittedly, I half watched an episode that was centered around. Have you still not finished that? What did they tell you about it? Keezy didn't even finish that episode. Yeah, come on, man. I can't bring myself to do it. But so I watched an episode that centred around Ray Nuss. Yes. And it was Ray Nuss's sister. What's her name? Tracy Nuss. So it centred around Tracy Nuss being caught up in a murder and it happened on Ray Nuss's premises of his Italian restaurant, right? Yes. In that episode, there would have been maximum 15 characters. Maximum. Yeah. How are you 54th?

26:46Keyzie:Well, that's my question. I mean, you guys can be brutally honest with me. Have I reached that point now where they're sort of shoving me out? Mogi, you'd have a bit of insight into this. Well, I know how you're getting down to number four because, of course, there's six different episodes probably. Is that what they're doing? Yes. Six different episodes. Every single episode has got a different murderer because it's murder of the week. So all of those murderers will be ahead of you because they've got a - I thought it was per episode. No, it's not per episode. And so that's how you will find yourself.

27:17so far down. And the reason for that as well is normally they would want more involvement for you, as you say, a beloved actor. Ray Norris. Ray Norris recognised from shows like...

27:32Mike Minogue:Wellington Per... He was in that, two episodes of that, Seven Periods with Mr. Gormsby, Outrageous Fortune, Young Hercules. Yeah, there's a lot of stuff. The list goes on and on and on. Yeah, it does. It really does. And we've been with you now, Jase, doing this show for five years. Every time you go there, all you do is complain. Yeah. And I've talked to your co-stars and they say, oh, do you work with Hoody J? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Does he only complain when he's at work with you? Because that's all he does when he's on set with us. It's always, this and that. Is that what I do with it? Maybe it's just gotten to the point where they're sort of read between the lines and they're thought, you know what, Jase doesn't want to tell us this.

28:12But maybe Ray Nass isn't a character that he feels a great affinity for anymore. Well, I mean... Maybe Ray Nass needs to be put out in the back paddock.

28:22Mike Minogue:Maybe he's too much of a pain in the actual A-Nass. You know what I mean?

28:26Keyzie:Well, even the woman that plays my mum in the show... What's her name? Deidre Nass.

28:32Mike Minogue:What about her?

28:33Keyzie:She's ranked higher than me now. Oh, my God. She's only appeared once. Yeah, right. Bloody outrageous.

28:39Mike Minogue:I'm sure it's nothing to worry about, Jase.

28:41Keyzie:Yeah, what I mean?

28:44Mike Minogue:Here's some Weezer. The Hodaki Big Show with Jace, Mike and Keezy. Tune in weekdays at four on Radio Hodaki.

28:53Keyzie:Tune. Bang bone. Velvet Revolver there on the Hodaki Big Show this Tuesday afternoon, 25 minutes past five o 'clock.

29:01Mike Minogue:Fellas, still to come on the show, a chance to get yourself in the draw to go to either Bathurst or the Grand Final. Would you rather? Listen out for that cue to call it. We'll be playing soonish. And when you hear it, 0800 Hodaki. But if you want to get a head start on tomorrow and know exactly when those are going to play, your best bet is to join the great New Zealanders club. Head to hodaki.co.nz and sign up there. It has the times, the exact times of those Q2 calls tomorrow and Brekkie and our show as well. How good. So good. Fellas, I'm going to go ahead and say that spring has sprung. Yeah, man.

29:36Okay. It's getting a little bit lighter. I don't know if you've noticed that. A little bit lighter, a little bit warmer. Certainly. I've noticed it, Mogi, for sure. But the big tell for me is the birds have started birding around my house. They wake up at about, or they wake me up, at around about 4 a.m. at the moment. They're going for it at the moment. And they are just chitting and chatting. You know, they are stoked at the change of the weather. They're letting each other know. They're letting other birds know probably 5, 10 k's away that they're awake. Yeah. You know.

30:11Keyzie:What a day. Oh. It's beautiful out. To wit, to woo. Another day, another dollar. Yes. Is that what they're saying? Yes. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Another day, another dollar. And I'm just wondering, what are they jabbering about? Yeah. The birds. The birds. I mean, what's so important that you've got to be up at 4 o 'clock in the morning running your goddamn yap while old Mogey's trying to get some Z's in? Do you think that birds have erotic dreams? Because this is what it's like in my household when I wake up. Yes. I've always had a pretty erotic dream, and the first thing I do is talk to my wife about my amazing erotic dream.

30:54Keyzie:At 4 a.m.? At 4 a.m., sometimes 3. Well, it's interesting you say that because they do. That's what bird behaviourists think. That's what's going on is they're waking up and they're saying, especially the males, this is my territory, just so you know I'm still here. and hey ladies, if you're keen, I've got a pretty sick nest over here if you want to come and have a gaze at it. Is that what they're saying? That's what they're saying. You want to come and hang out on my brunch.

31:19Mike Minogue:Pretty intense. Yeah, right. I'm just wondering though, you know, it's a little bit selfish and maybe, you know, they could just delay that chitter chat. Is there anything that can't wait till about 7, 7.30? What's the rush? Until you've gone to work, man. Until I've gone to work, man. And then go for it. Thank you. Yes. Well, I was staying at an Airbnb a few weeks back on Waiheke Island there, and they had a fake hawk. Oh, yeah. A fake hawk with wings that flapped around. It was like a mechanical hawk thing on a big post. Yeah. That didn't seem to work. Pigeons everywhere, to be honest. But you could look into that.

31:56It just sounds like it's throwing more fuel on the fire, to be honest with you, because I would have thought that if you dressed up some kind of a freak hawk with rotating legs and wings, all the birds are going to say to each other, come and check this bastard. Clown out.

32:13Keyzie:What about a scarecrow? I used to do a bit of scarecrow work back in the day. That's right. You did do a bit of scarecrow work, and that was until they worked out that you could just use a couple of sticks and a jersey, wasn't it? Yeah. Yeah.

32:28Look, maybe that would work, but to me it's a deeper problem that birds have got, and I sort of feel like culling. Well, what about – before we move to culling, it's a territory thing, right?

32:43Mike Minogue:It is. Why don't you get up there? Why don't I get my own nest? Get up there, set up a giant nest. Yes. Just one night is all it takes. Set up a big nest in the tree there and then wake up first thing and just let them know who's boss. Do you know what? Would really get those male birds good, Keezy. What's that, man? So if I went up there, imagine that. I've got a couple of loaves like old Keezy at a sausage fest, if you can picture that, man. Loaves of bread, yeah. And I'm in my big nest up there. I've built it on top of my roof, and I'm just throwing out the bread, throwing out the bread, and all the ladybirds, female birds, are just coming and hanging out with old mogie.

33:18Mike Minogue:Right, okay. Right? Yeah. And then all the male birds are like, oh, this is a waste of time around here. Look at that. Look at that sicko. Look at that good-looking fella. He's got bread to burn. What do you think? He's got a huge, impressive beak as well. We can't compete with that. I like it. The Hauraki Beak Show with Jace, Mike and Keezy. Tune in weekdays at 4 on Radio Hauraki.

33:39Keyzie:Yes, indeed, New Zealand. Waz or cars? You decide. Bathurst or the NRL Grand Final?

33:46Mike Minogue:Two amazing packages as well. It includes flights. It includes hotels. Everything taken care of thanks to boystrip.co.nz. including a couple of shuttles out to Mount Panorama, both Saturday and Sunday if you choose Bathurst. Or if you choose the Grand Final, you get to go to the Renwick races on the Saturday, then on the Sunday, a boat cruise to the Grand Final. How bloody good. Amazing. Get it in you. Absolutely amazing, fellas.

34:10Keyzie:Let's go to the phone lines. G'day, Hayley. How's life? Good, thanks. And you? Yeah, good, thanks. Can't complain. Thanks for asking. Tell me, Hayley, what do you do for a crust? Office manager. Backbone What kind of an office? You seem like you're a little bit coy there Hayley A doctor's surgery Oh yeah You shouldn't have told us that You need to be a bit more discreet when it comes to working on a doctor's surgery Oh wow Shocking

34:42Mike Minogue:Hey Hayley do you like rugby league or do you like supercars? Definitely rugby league Yeah Of course And Hayley if you won this prize who would you take with you? My husband. What's his name? Jeff. Jeff.

34:58Keyzie:Oh, he's a mad bastard.

34:59Mike Minogue:He's a mad bastard.

35:00Keyzie:Especially when he gets on the firewood.

35:02Mike Minogue:Yeah, can he still actually go into Aussie?

35:04Keyzie:I don't know if he can. Yeah, I think so. Hey, Hayley, good news. You're in the draw, all right?

35:09Mike Minogue:Awesome, thank you. Thanks, mate. No worries, mate.

35:12Keyzie:G'day, Logan, you mad bastard. How's life? Yeah, good, thanks. And yourselves? Yeah, can't complain, mate. Can't complain. What do you do for a crust, Logan? I'm a flood restoration technician. Oh. Backbone. It sounds like there's a bit of a more pedestrian name for that. Would I be right? Yeah. What is it, man? Technician. What is it? A carpet technician.

35:36Mike Minogue:A carpet technician. Good stuff, Logan. Are you into the NRL, mate, or are you thinking Bathurst? I'm up. NRL. I'm the wild. Yeah, totally. Good on you, totally. Bloody good stuff.

35:49Keyzie:What would you say the split would be so far, fellas? Are we talking 80-20 for the NRL?

35:54Mike Minogue:70-30. 70-30, I think. 70-30, yeah, yeah. 80-20, where'd you get that from? I don't know, man. That's madness. Just off the top of my head.

36:01Keyzie:Hey, great news, Logan. You're in the draw. Stay on the line and Pugs will sort you out, all right?

36:06Mike Minogue:Awesome. Good on you, mate. A couple of nice fellas there. A couple of backbones there. Well, one of them, of course, was a woman. Not that it matters. Women are fellas as well, though. Yeah, backbones, that's for sure. Everyone's a fella. I feel like... She didn't like being on the phone. No. She really wants to win the competition, but it's a bit nerve-wracking, isn't it, talking to old Rayness. Yeah, it is. Rayness off old Brokenwood there. Yeah, but I mean...

36:31Keyzie:She obviously freaked out because she gave away everyone's medical details and stuff, which is pretty shocking. She was shocking. Yeah, she was freaking out.

36:38Mike Minogue:Did she just randomly start blushing out? Yeah. She was like, www. Oh, my God, that's terrible. Medical records. Is that what she said? Hayley. Actually, if you're going to yell out... www.medicalrecords.syphilis That's good stuff fellas If you're going to read out a website read out boystrip.co.nz fellas and book your own trip NRL Grand Final completely sold out Bathurst though still a few packages available there boys Yeah good stuff mate

37:07Keyzie:In the meantime here's for the Blink 182

37:10Mike Minogue:The Hodaki Big Show with Jase, Mike and Keezy Tune in weekdays at 4 on Radio Hodaki

37:16Keyzie:The exponents there on the Radio Hodaki Karaki, big show this Tuesday evening. The time is 5.47. We were chatting birds before, fellas. On that front, Keezy. How's Keezy on all wings looking over his beak with me? Keezy had a big race over the weekend. How'd he go? Keezy on all wings looking over his beak with me, Keezy.

37:40Mike Minogue:Very confusing question if you've tuned in for the first time just now. Yeah. Welcome to the show. This is my racing. Welcome. It's my racing pigeon. Racing down south there. Born and raised in Oamaru. That's where it was hatched. And every single weekend they take it to a different location and it flies back to the coupe. That's how it works apparently. Yeah, man. So I think we've had one, two, three, four, five, six races so far, fellas. First race not good, finished in the 90s. Second race in the 70s or something. And then it was starting to creep up. Yes. Got into the 30s twice and we figured out it loves the long distances.

38:15Mike Minogue:Yes. The weekend just gone, longest distance so far. It was Blenheim to Oamaru, 470 kilometres. Take a guess as to where Keezy on all wings looking over his beak with me, Keezy, finished. First. No. Second. No. Third. Did you say bird? Third. Oh, no. Fourth. Okay, here's a hint. It was outside the top ten. Eleven. No. Twelve. 18th. Wow. 18th. Doesn't it get paid to 15th? Yeah, it does. It does. So if you finish 15th, you get$100. 15th all the way up to, I think it's about 4th or something, then it starts going up. And then if you finish first, you get$1 ,000. Wow. But the issue is that's the longest race.

39:03Mike Minogue:It's not going to get longer than that. It clearly wants to go for a further race, but it's not going to do any better. You think it wants to, do you? It wants to. It loves it. Right. I didn't mention that after the race. I'd love to go around one more time. Well, I don't know. Oh, Keezy. We had a chat to him on Friday. We did. I haven't chatted to him since, but I'm kind of split because it's like, it's not going to do any better than that. No. However, it did finish in the top 20, so it seems cruel to be like, all right, that's what I'm done with this thing. To eat it. Well, I wasn't going to eat it.

39:33Keyzie:Well, I mean, you don't want to just... You can't waste it. Waste it, Keezy. I mean, you spent 400 bucks on the bloody thing.

39:40Mike Minogue:Well, I was thinking you just sort of let it go. Let it go where? Yeah. You just sort of, you know, get its nest out of the coop, put it on the ground and say, oh, away you go.

39:49Keyzie:What about putting it into stud? Oh. So what does that mean?

39:55Mike Minogue:That's a great idea.

39:56Keyzie:You just farm it out to, you know, for stud.

40:00Mike Minogue:Right, so as in like a breeder. Yes. But how do I get it? Like how am I supposed to get the other pigeon breeders into it? Like, oh, hey, do you want this pigeon who sucks? Yeah, you're going to have to dress it up a bit more than that. Like physically dress the pigeon up? Well, yeah, you could do that. A little waistcoat. Yeah, because those are in at the moment. A little top hat. Yeah, those are in as well. It'd need a bit of rubber band underneath the chin to hold the hat on. Yeah, yeah. Because top hats, they don't really fit. Not on a pigeon, mate. Not on a pigeon. Yeah, go on. A monocle.

40:37Mike Minogue:A monocle. but that's tough for pigeons because they need that to see where they're going.

40:42Keyzie:Well, if you're going to go monocle, I would go bow tie as well with the waistcoat.

40:48Mike Minogue:I mean, I don't know if dressing the pigeon up like the Monopoly guy is the way to, you know, solve this issue.

40:55Keyzie:Probably need a cane as well. Yes, a cane.

40:57Mike Minogue:How's it going to hold a cane, Jase? It's a pigeon for Christ's sake. I think you just strap it to one of its legs. Oh, yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah. Okay. Well, we'll try that. and then... And see if you can put it out to stud. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I mean, imagine if you're a female pigeon. You've got all these pigeons that sort of walk through the door there. Regular-looking pigeons. Standard-looking bastards there. How much would... And who should walk in the door? Keezy. Keezy on all wings. Looking over his beak. With me, Keezy. With me, Keezy, yeah. Looking like a real sharp son of a bee. How much should I be charging?

41:33Yeah, for a seed.

41:36Mike Minogue:Yes. It's bird seed. Like, what,$20? Huh? $20 for a hoon? Fills? Fills? Here's Audio Slip. The Hodaki Big Show with Jase, Mike and Keezy. Tune in weekdays at four on Radio Hodaki.

42:00Keyzie:Welcome back, you massive bank bones. Hope your Tuesday nights are absolutely going off. If you're listening to The Big Show, by the way, brought to you by Reburgier.

42:09Mike Minogue:Craveworthy street food, freshly made with Reburgier.

42:13Keyzie:The name's burger. Dish, dish, dish. Reburgier. Yeah, good stuff. What's on the plate tonight, Mogey? Oh, Mogey over there. I'm not entirely sure, once again. I never know, do I? I never know. The wife has got her mother, brother and sister staying at the moment. Yes. So I'm hoping it's a delicious treat. A feast. Yeah, last night there was a roast chicken. Yeah, don't mind that. With selected roast vegetables, et cetera, et cetera. But I was already full. You remember that I was eating here. Yes, but I bet you had a massive plate of it, though. I didn't touch it. I didn't touch it. I didn't go anywhere near it.

42:51I had a bit of it for lunch today. But yeah, I'm not sure what I'm having. What are you having, Keezy? Chris. Chris. Hello. Christopher.

42:58Mike Minogue:Sorry, Michael. Jase. Sorry about that. From the radio. Well, I was telling you guys before about we've got a third-day ragu situation.

43:06Keyzie:Yeah.

43:06Mike Minogue:So what I've done is we slow-cooked a ragu, then I pulled the pot out of the slow cooker, put it in the fridge, and then yesterday I put it back in the slow cooker on low and heated it up again. And then I put it in the fridge again last night, and I'm like, can we have a three-day ragu that's been hot, cold, hot, cold? I don't think we can.

43:21Keyzie:No, you have to biff it.

43:23Mike Minogue:Do you think two times is the limit? Yeah, I think so. Biff it. There must be some sort of science behind it. Get some re-burgu. I'd love to. Jase, if I could just get re-burger every night for dinner, and to be honest, lunch and breakfast, I would. You know that. Yes, for sure. But at the end of the day, a third-day ragu might be my only option. Three to four days is the word I'm getting, Keezy. Hot, cold, hot, cold. Hot, cold, hot, cold. The in and out part matters. Reheating it doesn't reset the three to four-day clock, and ideally don't repeatedly warm the whole batch and put it back. You're just taking out the parts that you need, I'm assuming.

43:55Ideally. No, I wasn't. You're reheating the whole thing. Yeah, yeah.

43:59Mike Minogue:Because it's in a pot. It's like a slow cooker pot, right? Yes. And it looks like it's less than there is. Gone off? And so you're like, oh, that'll be enough for us tomorrow. And then you eat it, and you're like, oh, my God, we didn't even touch it. Right. So, yeah, it's a bit of a blowout, to be honest. Yeah. That's a shocker, man. I know. Thanks.

44:16Keyzie:Hey, just a reminder on that front. Text us now on 3483. What's for tea in New Zealand? We'll be getting into that next.

44:23Mike Minogue:Yeah, you can win yourself a$50 Reeburger voucher.

44:26Keyzie:It's bloody tricky with that ragu, Kesey.

44:28Mike Minogue:I know, man. I'd biff it, man.

44:29Keyzie:Seriously. Here's music.

44:31Mike Minogue:The Hauraki Big Show with Jase, Mike and Keezy. Tune in weekdays at four on Radio Hauraki.

44:37Keyzie:Yes, indeed. REM there on the radio. Hauraki Big Show this Tuesday evening. The time is 6.13, which means it's time for...

44:46Mike Minogue:Oh, yeah. Hey, guys. Text here from Steve. What's for tea, New Zealand? With me, Keezy. Yeah, that's right. What's for tea? You text in 3483, let us know. Include your name and where you're texting from. That always makes it a bit nicer, eh, fellas? Yeah, man.

45:04Keyzie:Chicken wraps. I had a chicken wrap today. Did you? Yeah, it was a bit of a weird one. I went along to a big meeting, big highfalutin meeting there, and they said, do you want something to eat? And I should have just said either no or a scone. But I had a tandoori chicken wrap. Right, okay. Which had lots of spinach in it all over my teeth. Shock. Oh, good. Didn't go very well at all.

45:26Mike Minogue:Then you blew the meeting. It was his big pitch. I shat the bed, which is a separate issue. G'day, guys. Henry here. Kissinger. Henry Hill from the movie Goodfellas. Matt. It's Henry Matt. Henry Matt. G'day, guys. Henry Matt having bangers and mash. Cheers. Love bangers and mash.

45:47Keyzie:Yeah, I mean. I love a saucy. You've got to have some sort of saucy action to go with the mash. Yeah, is there no gravy there? Does he mention a brown onion gravy or. Deviled sauce, mate?

45:57Mike Minogue:No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. That's like bangers and mash. Is it implied that you'll have a sauce or peas or whatever? Well, we're asking him what he's having for dinner. He's leaving out the key part. Yeah, crucial ingredient, Keezy. It's like it's giving me flashbacks to being at Jace's house to come dine with the Fjellas when he had no gravy for his bloody roast. You remember that? Yeah, I remember that. That was a shocker. G'day, guys. Jason here. Hoyt. Win Stanley What the boss of all of our stations Yeah Yeah that's good stuff Dave Jason Day Jason Nightingale Sorry it's actually Jackson Sorry I misread that

46:38Keyzie:Michael Pollock G'day guys

46:40Mike Minogue:Michael Jackson here from Dirty Old Invercargill Taking the miso out to the beach with some bento bowls Sounds lovely

46:47Keyzie:I don't like bento bowls No neither do I No I'm not a fan I don't like them at all I mean they're good in theory Yeah the idea's good But they're foul. They're shocking. Disgusting.

46:57Mike Minogue:So bento bowls got some nice salad or something in it, like some chicken. What's wrong with that? I don't know. It thinks it's better than it is. It's more of an attitude issue. Yeah, I agree. And I hate. Yeah, it's pretty full of itself. And it's always got the edamame in it on its own, but not inside the little packets.

47:17Keyzie:I don't like how it's compartmentalised. You know, each little pile of stuff, just chuck it in there and mix it up, man.

47:25Mike Minogue:So just Moggy referred to, is it the shell that edamames come in as packets? Yeah, their own little packets. Like a packet of chips. Yeah, you're right. You're right. G'day there, fellas. Who's that? This is from Dino. Oh, Dino Gorman. O 'Cain. Dino O 'Cain. G'day, guys. Dino here. I'm having chicken and leek pie with a bit of cracked pepper. Good eating. Yeah, nice. I love pie

47:49Keyzie:So do I Chicken and leek I'm fond of too I haven't had a chicken and leek pie For ages

47:55Mike Minogue:Get around to old Dino's place man Yeah man He'll sort you Old Dino Kane He'll sort you right out If you know what I mean Yeah I do Yeah yeah Hanging out in the back G'day fellas Sarah here Sarah Jessica Parker From Sex and the City Just so you guys know At any point we can park this whole Sarah Jessica Parker did you say Yeah I said yeah And if you want, I could just read them out. Sarah. It must be more than that in terms of Sarahs. You'd think there'd be dozens of the bastards. Silverman? No. Who was the royal? Oh, yeah. Oh, Princess Sarah. Yeah, what do they call her? Big Red.

48:34Keyzie:Is it Big Red?

48:35Mike Minogue:Yeah, it's Big Red. G'day, guys.

48:38Keyzie:Sarah Ferguson. Ferguson, yeah, that's it. Fergie, they called her. Big Red. Fergie, man bastard. Man bastard.

48:43Mike Minogue:G'day, guys. Fergie here. My wife's having pumpkin and kumara soup And I'm doing chicken burgers in the air fryer Cheers She's fallen a long way She has The Hauraki Big Show With Jase, Mike and Keezy Tune in weekdays at 4 on Radio Hauraki

49:03Keyzie:Chemical Brothers there on the Radio Hauraki Big Show This Tuesday night And Tuesday night's always a big night on the Big Show Because it's Teamless Tuesday Time to chat footy with me

49:15Mike Minogue:crazy. What are the Warriors up to? The Waz. The Waz. The Waz. They're taking on the Dolphins 6pm this very Saturday. If you don't have a ticket yet because it's completely sold out. Listen to the big show tomorrow. Listen out for a cue to call. It sounds like this.

49:39Mike Minogue:Which is kind of like their new team song. If you hear that during our show, call us on 0800 Hauraki and you can win a double pass to the sold-out home final, Mogi. That's absolutely right. We've got the team list here, fellas, and here it is. Your fullback is Tain Toa Piki. Oh, wow, okay. Chance Nicol Klukstart is on the wing. Oh, wow. He's on the wing. Your other winger is AKP. Okay, yeah. C &K is alongside Ali Laatoa. Who is? So Ali Laatoa is on the right centre with Chance Nicol Klukstart outside him. That's correct. Then you've got Lekka with AKP and your halves are CHT and Tamari Martin.

50:16Your forwards are James Fisher-Harris. Wade Egan returns after getting a week off to rest. Mitch Barnett, Kate Wellback from resting, Jacob Laban and Aaron Clarke. Then on the interchange, you've got Sam Healy, Tanner Stowers-Smith, Dimitri Valmonga, Eddie Iremia-Toyava and Adam Pompey. And Jackson Ford. Jackson's back. Makes his return to the bench after 12 weeks off after leading the Daly M's, all the way up to, I think, around 14, it might have been. Yeah. He is back, baby.

50:46Mike Minogue:That's huge, man. That's great because that starting pack makes me very exciting. You've got the solid, your Cape Wells, Wade Egan and James Fisher-Harris. Those guys have been so solid for us. But then you've got that young flair, Jacob Laban. Aaron Clark has been so mean all season. And then Jackson Ford off the bench.

51:04Keyzie:How good. How good. Sounds like a strong side, fellas. I'm stoked. A very, very strong side. And on the other side of the ledger, you've got the Dolphins, who are at full strength. We played twice over the course of the season already. Each side won one, lost one. Yes. And each game was decided by only two points.

51:26Mike Minogue:Yeah, and the Dolphins are a team. Offensively, they can pile on points in a hurry. They're one of the best in the entire competition. If they get their tails up, next thing you know, their fullback, Hamiso Tabuay Fidal, will have a hat trick. Like, you know, they've got really young, skucky, tricky halves as well. So to be honest, Moggy, you talked about this, I believe it was last week or yesterday even, I can't remember because I was hungover. But I have a feeling they're going to throw it wide and try to go around us. Yeah, I think so. And you'd be mad not to have a crack at it. It'll be interesting to see how they go.

51:58There's a lot of repair work to be done to the outside backs. So I think you're just going to find we're going to be doing a lot of rushing defence. Yeah. And if that happens, of course, it opens up for grubbers in behind and all sorts of stuff. I think regardless of the tactics, I think it's going to be an open game. I think it's probably, I think, I think it's the game of the round.

52:17Mike Minogue:It is. It's a huge match-up, and I'm worried about that right side wing of Leia Towa and Chance Niko Klukstar because they're not fast. They've got Selwyn Kobo, I believe it is. He's in supreme form on the left wing. If they score, I can see him getting a double or something. that's yeah yeah but I do like having Chansy I like him on the wing carrying out of the back end a bigger body all that sort of stuff so yeah I'm glad they've managed to get both of them on there and Tao Piki at full back means that we've got a goal kicker hopefully yeah yeah good stuff fellas I'm fizzed up guys let's do it don't forget listen to the show tomorrow listen out for that key to call you can win a double to that sold out home final

52:55Keyzie:beautiful

52:57Mike Minogue:The Hauraki Big Show with Jace, Mike and Keezy tune in weekdays at 4 on Radio Hauraki.

53:10Keyzie:Well, there you go, you mad bastards. That's the big show done and dusted this Tuesday on the Disclaimer podcast. What clip have you got for us today, Keezy?

53:19Mike Minogue:Fellas, today's clip is all about waking up.

53:21Keyzie:Oh, yeah.

53:22Mike Minogue:I think there was a lot of banging on about waking up and that. It comes out at 7.30 tonight. Where do you get your podcast from? Get him, get him, get him, get him. See you later, Mogey. From the footpath. It's f***ing six in the morning. I know. Carpet your houses, man. Carpet them up. Well, I do have carpet in the apartment. Carpet the outside. What, down the hallway? But it turned out. It turned out. Carpet the door. Keyser. That's right, yeah. Things kind of got a wee bit out of hand there, Phil. Bit of fisty cuffs.

53:49Keyzie:Yeah. Family time, by the sounds of it, tonight, Moggy. Well, no, I've got a play to go to. Oh, that's right, yes. Yes, I'm going to go and see the Mangrove Eaters down there at Basement Theatre. How good, how good. I'll let you know how that goes tomorrow. That's on at 8 o 'clock, so I've got time to get home for 5 or 10 minutes, spruce myself up a little bit, put on a suit, do the dishes, mop the floor, clean the bath a little bit. The bath. I've got to watch a movie. Oh, yeah. I've got to watch a movie, yes, I'll watch that. And then, yeah, that'll be me after the play. I'll tell you what, I'll let you know how it goes tomorrow.

54:23What are you up to there, Keezyman?

54:25Mike Minogue:I'm going to go home there. I've got a text from my wife. We're not having leftover three-day ragu. I'm having curry. Yeah, thank God for that. A chicken curry. Yeah, nice. I think it's a green curry. I messaged her before because apparently she's got some tickets for sale. Yeah, she's selling tickets to Chris Parker on Saturday night. She's gutted, the comedian, because she really wants to go, but we're going to the Warriors instead now. Yeah. And then you messaged her on her Instagram, and then she texts me being like, is Moki serious? And then I messaged her saying, no, he's not.

54:54Keyzie:She won't even let me on her Instagram. She's not letting me in. What do you mean? Well, she's, you know, because it's private, her account.

55:01Mike Minogue:Have you tried, so your friend requested her?

55:03Keyzie:Yes, and she said no.

55:04Mike Minogue:Have you tried poking her?

55:13Keyzie:I'll give that a try, Keezy. Is that, you think that'd be good?

55:17Mike Minogue:I think so. I mean, in my experience.

55:22Mike Minogue:What are you up to tonight, Jase? Yeah, that's a good question, because I, the thing is.

55:28Keyzie:Oh, do we have to? No, listen, this is true. It was on the disclaimer. We all had terrible sleeps last night. But the problem is, if you go to bed early, right, I tend to wake up early because I only seem to have a certain amount of time for sleep. And once that's up, then it's up, you know what I mean? So I'll probably try and stay awake as long as possible. See you tomorrow at 4.