FULL SHOW: Dinner & A Big Show

9:15Keyzie:I mean, it's all great stuff. I mean, here's a generalisation, fellas. Oh, God. Get the sirens ready there, Keezy. No, they've been disconnected. The alarms.

9:26Mike Minogue:Oh, is it a race-based thing you're about to say?

9:28Keyzie:I would say, generally speaking, Young women are more responsible than young men. Would that be fair? I think so. Yeah, not too many people who disagree with you there. Keezy, what were you like when you first got free reign of the car? What do you think I was like? Do you think I was a good boy? Look, I think you probably, you know, you might have gone 60 in a 50K zone. I think you would have had your hat on sort of crooked, a little bit crooked there. Backwards and crooked. You would have had your boxer shorts shown at the top of your jeans there. You would have pimped out your inhaler with a vivid, you know, drawing like red and black stuff on it.

10:08On my Ventolin. Yeah, maybe a Holden emblem or something like that.

10:11Mike Minogue:It was actually flames on the side of my Ventolin.

10:15Keyzie:Because you had the beads and the hair at that stage too. Yeah, yeah. You had your – Okay, so we're talking about driving though, right?

10:22Mike Minogue:The first thing I did when I got my restricted was pick up my mate, my best mate. Oh, yeah, right. Which obviously is illegal. And I've certainly changed my ways since then.

10:32Keyzie:Did you used to sneak it before you were official?

10:35Mike Minogue:What's that?

10:36Keyzie:The car. Did you ever? No. No, there's no way.

10:38Mike Minogue:I lived out in the country. I had a car with the loser plates on them, I used to call it, with the L plates. Right. Yeah, yeah, yeah. But, yeah, there was no way I could sort of sneak off with it. Yeah. My brother, he took our family car as my mother worked night duty to keep food on the table so she slept during the day. Yes. So he took it for a little burn, crashed it, rode it off. Wow, that's good. That was shocking as well, man. And apparently, Jase, Jase, Jase, apparently it happens all the time.

11:06Keyzie:Yeah, yeah, yeah, good.

11:09Mike Minogue:The Hauraki Big Show with Jase, Mike and Kesey. Tune in weekdays at four on Radio Hauraki.

11:16Keyzie:Live there on the Radio Hauraki Big Show this Tuesday afternoon. The time is 4.41.

11:22Mike Minogue:Fellas. Yes. Do you like going to LA and seeing some of the biggest bands in the world perform? Yes. Do you like doing that? Yeah, that sounds good, man.

11:29Keyzie:When was the last time you guys did that? I might go to Europe first, though, before I do that. Oh, yeah? Because of what you guys have recommended. What about if I said to you you could do it for free? Oh, definitely then. It would be a competition. Yes. And then when you got there, you got to see Green Day. Count me in.

11:46Mike Minogue:We are, of course, talking about the iHeartRadio Alter Ego event, which is happening January 17th at the Kia Forum in Los Angeles. We've teamed up with Air New Zealand, and we've got your first big overseas adventure for next year all sorted. You had to listen out for the cue to call. That has now played. Let's go to the lines, fellas. G'day, Jess.

12:05Keyzie:How's life, you mad bastard? Great, thanks. That's good, Jess. What do you do for a crust? I'm a teacher. Oh! Back by. We were talking about teachers yesterday, actually, Jess. I did. When do you break up for the Christmas holidays? 16th. Okay. And when do you come back? Kids come back on the 4th

12:30Mike Minogue:Of March Nah But we're there for the last two weeks Yeah good on you You're a massive backbone Sorry about these guys Hey Jess if you were to win this trip over to LA To see this amazing gig Who would you take with you mate I'd probably have to take my partner What's his name Or her Sorry Yeah, or her. Yeah, Keezy, or her, man. Every time she says his name, I can't hear what she's saying because you keep saying, or her. Yeah, shush. What is their name? Their name is Duncan. Duncan. Oh, yeah, yeah, cool. She's a backbone. Yeah, she's a shocker bastard.

13:14Keyzie:Good stuff, Jess. Hey, well, you're in the draw, so stay on the line and pugs will look after you. Let's go to Sam from Wellington. G'day, Sam, you mad bastard. How's life? Keezy! Keezy! Keezy! Keezy! Keezy! Keezy! Sam gets it, man. Yeah, I'm good, thanks, mate.

13:32Mike Minogue:How are you, bastard?

13:33Keyzie:Yeah, good, thanks, Sam. What do you do for a crust, you mad bastard?

13:37Mike Minogue:I am a delivery driver in Wellington. Oh, bag bone! Bag bone.

13:43Keyzie:Yeah, hang on.

13:44Mike Minogue:I've watched the money ride! Sorry, mate. Some little whore in a red ac will just cut me off. Good on you, Sam. And if you won this trip, mate, who would you take with you? Oh, bro, I have to take the missus on this one. She loves a bit of Green Day. Oh, okay, yeah.

14:02Keyzie:She's got great taste, mate. Can we just give it to Sam now?

14:05Mike Minogue:No, Jase, that's not how it works. Oh, okay. But Sam, congratulations, mate. You're in the draw. Good luck. Bag pony, you're a bloody bag bone. Yeah, good on you, mate. You're the lion and old pugs. We'll have a yarn to you. Plenty more chances to get yourself in the draw. Maybe one more coming up in the show. I don't know. See how we go, fellas. Really? Maybe. Oh, start me up, Keezy. Once I start, I never stop, man. You heard that about me? I've heard Mick Jagger say that. Is that the same about you as well? Oh, yeah. I'm a shocking bastard.

14:33Keyzie:Here's the Rolling Stones.

14:35Mike Minogue:The Hauraki Big Show with Jase, Mike and Keezy. Tune in weekdays at four on Radio Hauraki.

14:41Keyzie:Soundgarden there on the Radio Hauraki Big Show this Tuesday afternoon. Let's talk some TV. What's on the telly with Mike Minogue?

14:57Yes. Yes. Jase, please say yes. Yes, yes. Before I get started now, I watched the Martin Scorsese film Killers of the Flower Moon, starring DiCaprio and De Niro and a whole bunch of others. Jesse Plemons. A couple of years old now, that bugger it is. It is, yes. And I finally got around to it. A huge fan of all of those guys. Before I crack into it, somebody messaged in yesterday and said, why is it that everything Mogi talks about seen, having watched, he seems to hate all of it? Right. I'll take exception to that because last week I saw Pluribus and I gave it over four stars. Buzzies. Buzzies.

15:37Yes. I gave it more than four buzzies, so I resent that. The Killers of the Flower Moon sucks.

15:43Mike Minogue:I was going to say, I think you're more inclined to slam something they'd say if something's excellent. Well, if it's excellent, I'll say it's excellent, but I'm harder to impress, I think. Scorsese has got into this habit now of, you know, why make a movie that's 90 minutes long when it can be 3 hours 40? Yeah. The weird thing about this film, and it's based essentially on a true story about the Osage Indians over in the US, and maybe it's the 30s or the 20s or something like that, I'm not entirely sure when it is, but they've got a whole bunch of oil, so all the white men come along and they try and marry into these families so that they can steal the oil off them.

16:18It's true. Yes. And a whole bunch of people get murdered so that these guys can try and get the oil. Well, they tell you who the murderers are right at the very start of the film and then they don't tell you anything else for the rest of the film. I got two and a half hours into it. Nothing happened. I turned it off. Yeah. Yeah, I don't know what to tell you, man. I mean, Leonardo DiCaprio is meant to be a 28-year-old. The dude was 48 when he filmed it. The dude was 48 years old, and I'm meant to believe he's 28. Yeah. I, you know... I mean, he's 28 at heart. Scorsese, well, yeah, his partners are 21.

16:53His partners are 21, yeah. Yeah, I just don't know what it is. I just think they let these guys make whatever they want, and the producers come along and they're too weak to say anything. That could have had two hours cut out of it, and it still would have been an hour and a half too long.

17:06Mike Minogue:So you reckon if I had a good producer like Pugs, who produces our show, do you reckon it would have been better? Like Pugs. Well, the trouble is that Martin Scorsese gets final cut, so the film comes out however he decides it should be, regardless of whether it's good for an audience to watch. He also made The Irishman recently, a few years ago. Yes. Jack Nicholson, Joe Pesci was on Netflix, four hours long, an abomination. I'll give it a couple of... It's worth it for some of the performances and all that sort of stuff, but man, can you make a 90-minute film? If you're a master, Scorsese's meant to be a master of the craft.

17:38If he's a master, why has it taken so goddamn long... To tell the story. To tell the story. Yes, fair point.

17:44Mike Minogue:Your favourite movie of all time is one of his films, right? Like, Goodfellas. Pulp Fiction and, yeah, Goodfellas is up there as well. So you love Scorsese. I love Scorsese.

17:52Keyzie:The only issue that I have with what you were saying there, Keezy, about Pugs being the producer is he'd just want more buzzies.

18:00Mike Minogue:Yeah, you're right. Like five buzzies. But it might be shorter.

18:02Keyzie:Yeah, well, it'll be shorter.

18:04Mike Minogue:He might walk in and go, hey, fellas, let's just bring this down to 90 minutes and just ten times the buzzies. Yes.

18:10Keyzie:Have you seen that movie, Jase? Yes, I have. Yes. And I didn't dislike it as much as you, but I absolutely take your point. It's way too long. Did you watch it in one sitting? Yes, I did. It's way too long and easily an hour and a half chopped out of that bastard. It was pretty interesting. They would be introducing characters at the two-hour mark. Yes. I'm not interested, man. Get them out of here. It won lots of awards, eh? Yeah, well, Academy Awards. She was the first Native American, the female lead, was the first Native American nominated for an acting award. DiCaprio was nominated for Scorsese's script, film, all of that sort of stuff.

18:49If anybody else had made it, nobody would have watched it.

18:53Keyzie:I watched Polaroid Rubius.

18:56Mike Minogue:By the way, just quickly, if anyone's got any input and has seen that movie, 3483. We'd love to hear feedback. Yeah, especially if people loved it. I really want to know. That's on Netflix at the moment, I think. Yeah. That's where I saw it. Buzzies of the Flower Moon. Buzzies of the Flower Buzzies. What did you watch, man? Pluribus. Cool. The Hauraki Big Show with Jase, Mike and Keezy. Tune in weekdays at four on Radio Hauraki.

19:20Keyzie:Welcome back, you massive backbones. Hope you're surviving your Tuesday afternoon. You are listening to The Big Show brought to you by Reburg Gear.

19:28Mike Minogue:Craveworthy street food freshly made with Reburg Gear. Jase. Oh, shit. Sorry. Sorry. That was the wrong one. That's shocking from you, man. I meant to hit this one. Can you hit that one again And then the one that you hit before Which order? The second one first So the second one first And the first one second Okay Yum Jizz Yeah there's something about that Something Yeah Sorry Jase I didn't mean to play that one That was a complete

19:59Keyzie:Well you know how I love Pugsans Little steams That he makes for Reburger

20:04Mike Minogue:If you had paused longer I was going to fire Fire that sucker off right in the middle of that sentence. Oh, choked on it. What are you choking on there, Jase?

20:14Keyzie:New Zealand 135 for five, by the way. Yeah, man. And just remember, fellas, there's kids in the car at the moment, all right? Is there? If there's kids in your car at the moment and you're outraged by Mogey and Keezy, text through on 3483 and let me know. Well, actually, there are kids in the car, yours included, Jase. She just got her licence. Restricted. Unrestricted, that is. And so she's out and about. If anybody sees a red aqua out there on the roads, you let us know on 3483. We're a little bit worried. Jase is a little bit worried. We need to keep an eye on her.

20:47Mike Minogue:Does this sound like her? Someone texts through saying, G'day, fellas, just spotted a red aqua outside Ellerslie Driving Range. She hasn't played golf, does she?

20:54Keyzie:Not that I'm aware of. But what I can tell you is she's currently in the process of picking up my wife from her work. Pika, it's bloody busy out there. There's a lot of bloody cars going on.

21:06Mike Minogue:Oh, God, Jase. Oh, God.

21:09Keyzie:Here's Pluto.

21:10Mike Minogue:The Hauraki Big Show with Jase, Mike and Keezy. Tune in weekdays at four on Radio Hauraki.

21:17Keyzie:She-Hart there on the Radio Hauraki Big Show this Tuesday afternoon. The time is 12 minutes past five o 'clock. New Zealand currently 139 for five, fellas.

21:29Mike Minogue:They've stabilised a wee bit, haven't they? Well, barely. Keezy, you're doing bloody well with your trying to learn about cricket, man. I've really been enjoying it off air. Kesey's been asking all sorts of questions of Jase, and Jase's been loving it. It's making you feel smart, isn't it, Jase? Yeah, man. You know you're cricket, man.

21:44Keyzie:Yeah, I do like a bit of cricket. So this is a cricket test, right, this one? Yes, it's a test match, Kesey. Cricket test. Oh, okay.

21:51Mike Minogue:Hey, so, fellas, cricket isn't the only thing I'm sort of trying to, you know, go outside the square with. Oh, no.

21:58Keyzie:This is going to get weird. This is going to be sexual again.

22:00Mike Minogue:Oh, no, no, no, no, no. You know I'm very much meat and two veg when it comes to the sexual side of things. Tonight Meat and two veg Sorry, meat and three veg Yeah, meat and two veg is a horrible image Tonight, after the show, my wife and I are going out for dinner And a show We're going to go see a stage show We're going to go see something that I traditionally do not like Yes Which is people treading the boards and acting

22:32Keyzie:Right, okay

22:32Mike Minogue:So a friend of my wife's is in a stage show we were asked if we wanted to come along and support we were like absolutely initially I was like no go with one of your other mates I hate stuff like that but then I thought Jason Mike you know you guys have done your share of treading the boards and acting on stage I was like I should try and learn more about it just like I'm doing with cricket tests and so I'm going to go along tonight I just want to know what am I looking out for you know what's the key to enjoying one of these shows because traditionally I've hated every single one I've ever done to

23:01Keyzie:Can I just clarify here Keezy It's a play.

23:04Mike Minogue:Yeah, it's like a play, yeah.

23:06Keyzie:But it's not a musical?

23:07Mike Minogue:I'm not sure. Musical's a different thing. Yeah, I intentionally didn't learn too much about it because I just want to go in there and just experience it. Yes, that's nice. If I know it's a musical, I'll probably not want to go even more than I can.

23:21Keyzie:Yeah, if you want to get deep inside my goat, book me for a musical. Right, okay. Yeah, it's tricky. Well, first of all, when you get there, it depends if you've got allocated seating because you want to be as close to the door as possible. The door? The door, the exit.

23:34Mike Minogue:Is that like the best acoustics or something? No, no, it's just so you can leave without a word of life. So if you need to go to the bathroom and you're on the wrong side, and oftentimes when you go to theatres, you have to exit through the stage. Right. You have to exit through the stage, depending on the size of the theatre. So you don't want to be walking through the stage when people are in the middle of the performance. You also don't want to piss yourself. Yeah.

23:57Keyzie:So should I? That is, can I just say, a really good point. You don't want to be sort of four rows back in the middle. Yeah. You know, they're in the middle of a very poignant moment in the thing. You need to do a mimi, some wheeze, and then you sort of – because I'm imagining you'll have a few beers and wines and stuff. And also he's just been out for dinner. He likes his spicy food. So, you know, you're right in the middle of a heartfelt scene and all of a sudden old Keezy's ripping ass up the back row. Yeah, it's not a good look, Keezy. That's shocking from you, man.

24:28Mike Minogue:I haven't done it yet.

24:29Keyzie:I mean, if someone's trying to watch a plane and, you know, someone shits themselves in front of them.

24:34Mike Minogue:Wait, so now I'm doing poos in my pants as well? You shouldn't do that, Keesey.

24:37Keyzie:It depends how spicy you got it, whether it was like Indian hot. Yeah, no, it'll be spicy. It'll be spicy, yeah. So close to the door. All right, okay. But seriously, that is a good thing because I'm – you know what I'm like. I'm angsty. Yes. You mean anxious? I need to be able to get out. Right. And so being right in the middle. No good. No good, man. They're no good. The other thing is, and you were saying that your wife, she's got a friend that's in the play. One of her mates is in it, yeah. You've got to prepare yourself with a whole slew of one-liners because often you would expect that you would wait after the show and you would see the friend and talk about how you felt about the show.

25:14Mike Minogue:Is this what they call giving them their flowers? Giving them their flowers. So you either, if you loved it, then it's not a problem at all. But if you hated it. Which I probably will. You can't say, I hated it. Right, okay. So one of the things you can say to them, for example, You just do sort of non-specific sort of vagaries that sound like compliments and only on further analysis when you've already left will they think to themselves, hang on, I'm not entirely sure that was a compliment at all. Yes. Things like, wow, certainly makes you think. Yeah. That's a good one. That's good.

25:43Keyzie:One of my favourites, the lighting was good. Yes. Right, okay. Who did the costumes? Right, okay. You writing these down, Keezy? I'll remember them. Yeah, okay, good. That was certainly a brave performance. A brave performance. Yeah, nice. That's good.

26:01Mike Minogue:What about saying things like, oh, wow, interesting. Yes, that's it.

26:04Keyzie:That's exactly it. That's in that kind of range for sure. Man, I could not believe what I was seeing. Yeah. Yeah, right, okay. How long have you been practising that?

26:17Mike Minogue:Right, okay. Those are all good. So all of those and just confirming not allowed to do poos. Oh, you know, they sort of set aside certain areas.

26:25Keyzie:Well, I'm thinking if Kesey's had a really spicy meal, like he probably will, he's probably already going to be in the bog and he'll be avoiding that after-show stuff anyway. You know what I mean? People will be going, God, who's this dude? He's just ripping ass in the toilet. I just want to go for a wee.

26:40Mike Minogue:It's funny because I was thinking of playing classy music underneath this chair. I'm glad I didn't.

26:47Keyzie:But, yeah, just be classy, Kesey. Just be classy. No, I'm going to rip ass. Are you going to wear your Tony jacket?

26:54Mike Minogue:Yeah, man. The Hauraki Big Show with Jace, Mike and Keezy. Tune in weekdays at four on Radio Hauraki.

27:01Keyzie:David Bowie there on the Radio Hauraki Big Show this Tuesday afternoon. Now, fellas, do you remember Magic Round this year?

27:08Mike Minogue:Oh, I remember Magic Round this year. Yeah, yeah. It was a huge weekend.

27:12Keyzie:It was a huge weekend.

27:13Mike Minogue:It was a huge weekend. And just around that, we've got some breaking news.

27:20Mike Minogue:This is breaking news. Magic round for the NRL, if you don't know what it is. It is every single NRL team playing one another over one weekend at one stadium in Brisbane, Suncorp Stadium, and for the last couple of years, we've been there. Interestingly enough, it's not everyone. I think one team drops out, and it may well be the minor premiers, Canberra Raiders, are missing out next year, which is an interesting choice. How about that? Yeah, well, it's 17 teams. Someone's got to miss out. Someone's got to miss out, and traditionally as well, they always make it a Warriors home game. They do. Which even though, and this is the stupidest part, we are playing the Broncos.

27:54Mike Minogue:Yes. It is their home stadium, and it counts as us having a home game. Now, I want to be clear about this, because you often hear people complaining about it. This is a choice made by the Warriors, because what it means is the Warriors get the gate. So they get all of the money from the tickets sold for that game. Oh, great idea. And so as far as the Warriors are concerned, it is worth giving away a home game to get all of that money. Moogie. There you go. That is really, really, that is an important piece of information. It's good to know, isn't it? Because what it feels like is we're getting absolutely robbed again by the NRL, but it's not that.

28:27Mike Minogue:That's a really good piece of information. And just quickly, Jase, before you interrupt, the turnout there, I can 100 % see why they make that call. The amount of Warriors fans there, it is out the gate. It's humane. Because what is the capacity? 70 or 80? Jase? What's the capacity of Suncorp? About 82, I think. That's great. It's about 82. So it's a lot of money into the coffers of the Waz there. And let me tell you, we've been the last couple of years, haven't we, Jase? And it is a hell of an experience. It's a party from start to finish, an absolute treat, and we are going back next year. Hauraki are officially going back.

29:03Mike Minogue:We don't know what it's going to look like. We might have to switch some things up to, you know, change it around and just keep it interesting because we've been two years in a row. And, yeah, so...

29:11Keyzie:So do none of the other teams get any cut of the tickets? It's exactly the same thing. So any team that plays in Brisbane that has been given the away term, then they get all the money. But the home teams, I believe, don't get anything. Or it's a much lower cut. Right, okay. Interesting. Interesting.

29:29Mike Minogue:It's exciting, though. So packages are currently on sale. BoysTrip.co.nz.

29:36Keyzie:Packages. Jase. Sorry, man.

29:38Mike Minogue:BoysTrip.co.nz. Get your mates together. Secure a package. and if you do go with Boys Trip, of course, we traditionally travel with them. You will be able to link up with us and our winners and the Hauraki crew as well. So if you want to guarantee it, get your mates together now. Go to boystrip.co.nz. Boys Trip have flights, accommodation transfers, tickets, every single thing sorted, including tickets to all games, 100 % sorted. Beautiful. The Hauraki Big Show with Jace, Mike and Kesey. Tune in weekdays at 4 on Radio Hauraki.

30:10Keyzie:Bush there on the radio. Hauraki, big show this Tuesday afternoon. By the way, a few people have texted in on 3483 asking if we're doing what's on the dinner with me, Keezy, tonight. Of course we are. It's a Tuesday. So let us know what you're having for dinner tonight on 3483 and you go in the draw for a$50 Reburger voucher.

30:33Mike Minogue:Yeah, that's right. People were texting and asking. Yes. People must really love it. They love it, man. They love it. Yeah, yeah, tight. Yeah. Hey, fellas, I've worked out a way to inject a little bit more romance, a little bit more heat back into my marriage. Yeah, a bit of spice. I think you guys might want to take this on board as well. You started wearing the paper bag.

30:56Keezy, come on, man. That's good stuff from you, Keezy.

30:57Mike Minogue:Why are you sticking up for moving? That's shocking, man. That's hurtful. You know, we've had an episode before where you've bullied me and we had to give you an asterisk in the old throbber there, and here you are again having learnt nothing. Sorry, but do you want me to put another one next to the Throbber scoreboard? Now, I was out and about in town yesterday, and I had to make my way home swiftly. But I didn't want to walk. I didn't want to get an Uber because it was pretty heavy traffic. So I got myself one of those Lime scooters. And the only one that was available was one of those ones with the seat on it.

31:30I've always wanted to ride one of those. Same, actually. Oh, let me tell you, it's so much fun. Yeah. But more than that, it's cool as shit. So what you do is you sit on it and it goes about, oh, could be up to 4Ks an hour, 3, 4Ks. Is this downtown Auckland? Downtown Auckland, which is kind of where I live. It's really limited there. Outside of that, it gets up to like 7, 8 max speed. So I arrived home at roughly the same time as my wife got home from being oot-na-boot. And she was absolutely over the moon to see me rocking one of those sit-down lines. Yeah, that is hot, man.

32:06Mike Minogue:Because did she arrive home and you guys, you recently got a nice new car. Yeah. So she's in that. Yeah. And you're on a sit-down lime scooter. Is there anything hotter than a 49-year-old dude riding a lime scooter at 4Ks an hour? With a seat on it? Sitting down. The breeze rustling through your hair. Sitting down on it. Yeah, she was absolutely loving it. So I reckon you guys should think about doing it as well because chicks love old men on sit-down scooters. Yeah, right. Good to know. Do you reckon you'd look into that, Chase? Or will you go straight to the mobility scooter? He's firing shots.

32:47Mike Minogue:He is.

32:48Keyzie:Guys. He is really firing shots, old Keezy. No, I find them a bit spooky. Oh, do you? Yeah, a bit scary. Well, they go pretty quick. Yeah, well, that's what I mean. Do they have helmets or anything like that? Yeah, I was wearing my helmet. I think that's really what put her over the years.

33:04Mike Minogue:The Hauraki Big Show with Jace, Mike and Keezy. Tune in weekdays at four on Radio Hauraki.

33:10Keyzie:Bush there on the Radio Hauraki Big Show this Tuesday afternoon. By the way, a few people have texted in on 3483 asking if we're doing what's on the dinner with me, Keezy, tonight. Of course we are. It's a Tuesday. So let us know what you're having for dinner tonight on 3483 and you go in the draw for a$50 Reburger voucher.

33:33Mike Minogue:Yeah, that's right. People were texting and asking. Yes. People must really love it. They love it, man. They love it. Yeah, yeah, tight. They love it. Yeah. Hey, fellas, I've worked out a way to inject a little bit more romance, a little bit more heat back into my marriage. Yeah, a bit of spice. I think you guys might want to take this on board as well. You started wearing the paper bag.

33:56Keezy, come on, man. That's good stuff from you, Keezy.

33:57Mike Minogue:Why are you sticking up for moving? That's shocking, man. That's hurtful. You know, we've had an episode before where you've bullied me and we had to give you an asterisk in the old Throbber there and here you are again having learnt nothing. Sorry, but do you want me to put another one next to the Throbber scoreboard? Now, I was out and about in town yesterday and I had to make my way home swiftly. But I didn't want to walk. I didn't want to get an Uber because it was pretty heavy traffic. So I got myself one of those Lime scooters and the only one that was available was one of those ones with the seat on it.

34:30I've always wanted to ride one of those. Same, actually. Oh, let me tell you, it's so much fun. Yeah. But more than that, it's cool as shit. So what you do is you sit on it, and it goes about, oh, could be up to 4Ks an hour, 3, 4Ks. Is this downtown Auckland? Downtown Auckland, which is kind of where I live. It's really limited there. Outside of that, it gets up to like 7, 8 max speed. So I arrived home at roughly the same time as my wife got home from being oot in a boot. and she was absolutely over the moon to see me rocking one of those sit-down lines. Yeah, that is hot, man.

35:06Mike Minogue:Because did she arrive home and you guys, you recently got a nice new car. Yeah. So she's in that. Yeah. And you're on a sit-down lime scooter. Is there anything hotter than a 49-year-old dude riding a lime scooter at 4km an hour? With a seat on it? Sitting down. The breeze rustling through your hair. Sitting down on it. Yeah, she was absolutely loving it. So I reckon you guys should think about doing it as well because chicks love old men on sit-down scooters. Yeah, right. Good to know. Do you reckon you'd look into that, James? Or will you go straight to the mobility scooter? He's firing shots.

35:46Mike Minogue:Oh, gosh. He is.

35:48Keyzie:Guys. He is really firing shots, old Keezy. No, I find them a bit spooky. Oh, do you? Yeah, a bit scary. Well, they go pretty quick. Yeah, well, that's what I mean. Do they have helmets or anything like that? Yeah, I was wearing my helmet. I think that's really what put her over the years.

36:04Mike Minogue:The Hauraki Big Show, weekdays from four on Radio Hauraki.

36:08Keyzie:Led Zeppelin there on the Radio Hauraki Big Show this Tuesday evening. Keep those texts coming in, by the way, on 3483. What's on the dinner table for you tonight? And we'll be getting stuck into those after six o 'clock.

36:21Mike Minogue:That's right, every text on 3483 with what you're having for dinner in the draw for a$50 re-burger voucher, which goes a long way. Yes. You can get a lot of food for that.

36:29Keyzie:You can, actually.

36:30Mike Minogue:The other day, I had a leftover cheeseburger. Did I tell you about that? Yeah, you did. I think you had some of it on the night before and then some was left over after the hangover. Yeah. Your wife had ordered it and she couldn't get through it and you sort of got home. In fact, I think you're still pissed up and you thought, oh, you know, oh, Keezy. Yeah, that's right. Yeah, yeah. Well, I'm glad I've already told that story that there's no reason to relitigate it.

36:53Keyzie:Did you put it in the air fryer?

36:55Mike Minogue:I put it in the air fryer. Yeah, yeah. It's good eating, man. What do you think about the air fryer, Keezy?

37:05Mike Minogue:The Hauraki Big Show with Jace, Mike and Keezy. Tune in weekdays at four on Radio Hauraki.

37:11Keyzie:Welcome back, you massive backbones. Hope your Tuesday night's going along very nicely. You're listening to The Big Show brought to you by Reburguria.

37:19Mike Minogue:Handcrafted burgers, loaded fries and gourmet eats. That'll change the game. Ah, tell you what, that is bloody refreshing. It's not super warm yet because it's still obviously, you know, full summertime. But bloody excited for more swims. You going to hop in or? Well, to be honest, I think I'll be diving into some rebug instead. Well, I'm sure you could do both. Oh, that's okay. I'm going to dive in. You know why? Oh, go on. Because it's ya!

37:56He was humouring there, wasn't he?

37:59Keyzie:Yeah. I love him. Fellas, I've been doing radio for a long time. Yeah. Some of it was great. Some of it was terrible. Oh, yeah. Never in my life have I been more impressed with a series of, what would you call them? Advertorials? Stings. Stings. They're not stings so much.

38:22Mike Minogue:I don't know, it's a pre-made radio device. That's good stuff. You're making it sound like a sex toy, Casey. What do you mean? Pug said he's been in discussions with Marvel, and they're looking to turn them into a series of movies, feature films. So it'll be interesting to see how that goes, because the development process can be long, and oftentimes you lose the heart and the soul of something. Yes, you do. So you're going to have to be careful with that, but a lot of big money on offer for old Pugs aren't. It's just absolutely great stuff. Do you reckon, Jase, as my agent, you could get me a role in the upcoming Reburger Universe movies?

39:00Mike Minogue:Oh, they're too good, Keezy. They haven't even had the deal yet. How do you know they're too good?

39:06Keyzie:Well, yeah, I know, but it's just next-level stuff. Right. You know. Okay. Yeah. Good try, though, Keezy. That's the kind of pressure you've got to put on your agent, man. Totally, man. You've got to be badgering them constantly.

39:18Mike Minogue:It's weird because I would have thought the agent would just sort of be doing that on my behalf anyway. Oh, shit. Oh, yeah, for most people. Far out. God, I hate agencies. Do you like the chilies? Oh, God. Yeah. The Hauraki Big Show. Weekdays from four on Radio Hauraki.

39:38Keyzie:Blake Sabbath here on the Radio Hauraki Big Show this Tuesday night. Now, we love this, don't we, fellas? Let's get into it.

39:47Mike Minogue:Oh, yeah, hey, guys. Text here from Steve.

39:51Keyzie:What's on the tea with me dinner?

39:57Mike Minogue:What's on the tea with me dinner? Pugs, are we going to replace that to the old one at any point? That's a good one, man. Really? I just think it makes it even more confusing. What's on the tea with me dinner? Something that happened once. But there's a ring to it. That's magic, man. That's magic. Yeah, I don't mind it.

40:15Keyzie:I mean, I don't want to cut in on your territory here, TZ.

40:18Mike Minogue:That's exactly what you're doing. Shocker. This is my territory. This is my... I thought of it. I was like, hey, what if we did a segment where people text their dinner in? You've got to have it written into your contract, man. You should get it written into your contract. Yeah, okay. I might have to do that for next year. By the way, this is a segment where you text in what you're having for dinner, then we read it out. G'day, fellas. Jase here. Jason Hoyt. Gun. It's Jason Gun. Oh. Living in the Tron now. I thought he was in Christchurch. Dinner tonight is last night's curry. Yeah, that's good.

40:50Mike Minogue:I love a curry the next day. It tastes good. So do I. I always over-order so that I can be sure that I'm going to have some the next day.

40:55Keyzie:Oh, that's good. Yeah. Are we talking specifically takeaway curries here, though? Right? Yeah. Yeah? Yeah. Yeah, yeah. I agree. Either or either, but I never make a curry, so in my case, it's always a takeaway. Yes.

41:07Mike Minogue:Even leftover curry that we've made, because we quite often make red curry, green curry, masaman.

41:11Keyzie:We used to. We don't so much. Well, I used to make them, but I don't think my wife really enjoys making those curries, so. That's so easy. But I, yeah, they are.

41:19Mike Minogue:Curry paste, bit of coconut cream? Bit of this, bit of that.

41:22Keyzie:Bob's your uncle. I do the same as you, Moggy, when I get a curry. I over-order, you know, with the thought that I can have that for lunch tomorrow as well. That's forward thinking there, Keezy. That's planning ahead, brother. Make a note of that.

41:33Mike Minogue:It's Keezy thinking. What do you mean over-order? Well, I just get more than I need for that moment. The amount that you eat, do you order two onion bhajis, have one for dinner and one for lunch the next day?

41:46Keyzie:He's got you there. Well, no, if I get two onion bhajis, that's four days of food. Because I never eat a whole onion bhaji. That's true. They're massive.

41:54Mike Minogue:G'day, guys. Rob here. Rob Roy. Lowe. Rob Lowe. Rob Lowe. Wow, how hot. He is hot. Yeah, man. I know. Don't have to tell me. G'day, guys. Spaghetti and meatballs. In brackets, home rolled. Home rolled spaghetti. That would take ages. I don't think so. Moggy. I would buy it from the shop. Moggy. I think he's talking about the meatballs. Oh, yes.

42:19Keyzie:How do you guys feel about pre-rolled meatballs? Because I'll tell you what happened to me last night. We were having falafels, and normally we just buy, you know, the bowl of falafel mix and scoop it out. Yes. My wife didn't do that. They were pre-rolled falafel balls. Can I tell you what they are, man? They're a dry bastard. They are dry. No good. I've tried them before, but it's a shortcut. It's a lazy move. And it backfires because they're inedible.

42:48Mike Minogue:Are you talking about pre-rolled ones? Fluffle. Yes. When you have to take it out and do it yourself, it's still got the moisture in it. But the pre-rolled ones are shocking bastards. Shocking bastards. Right. G'day, guys. Oscar here. Oscar De La Hoya. Knightley. Oscar Knightley. Who's that? He said Knightley. I've never heard of her. Is that Kitely? Are you thinking of Keira Knightley? No. Yeah, you're thinking of Keira Knightley. I think you're thinking of Keira Knightley. Yeah, no, it was Oscar. Oscar Kightley. Yeah. G'day, guys. Oscar Kightley here, having steak, eggs, and chips. No. Why not?

43:26Mike Minogue:Just no. You don't have eggs on steak or chips with steak. It's just... What? Really bugs me, Keezy. What? That is such a staple. My dad loves that exact meal. I rest my case. No, don't. Don is a national treasure. I think. Is my dad a national treasure? I think he's a household treasure. Yeah. Right at your joint.

43:51Keyzie:Not for much longer if he keeps eating steak, eggs and chips. Don't you make jokes about. Come on, man. Actually, I'll take that back. No, he can't. Oh. Oh, he's in trouble.

44:00Mike Minogue:The Hauraki Big Show. Weekdays from four on Radio Hauraki.

44:04Keyzie:Green day there on the Radio Hauraki Big Show this beautiful Tuesday evening. Now, if you're a basketball fan, you need to listen up, fellas, because we've been running the most amazing competition, haven't we?

44:16Mike Minogue:We certainly have, Jase. The Backbone Bench, it is an opportunity for you and three of your mates to sit courtside at the next up-and-coming Breakers game. How good. Which just so happens to be the Breakers taking on the Sydney Kings, and this is in Hamilton tomorrow night. Mogi, do you like Hamilton? Who doesn't like Hamilton, man? That'll be my question for you, other than everybody. Yeah, yeah. But my family live there. I've got my sisters there. I've got my stepmothers there. They've got pets and stuff. All of them lovely people and animals. I love getting down to Hamilton.

44:45Keyzie:And you're quite fond of your garden tours there, aren't you? They've got some lovely gardens in Hamilton. Look, I don't know if you've ever been to Hamilton, but they've got some beautiful gardens down there. Their botanical gardens is second to none, Keezy. Really? Get along, brother, if you haven't been. And also they've got a river.

45:01Mike Minogue:Oh, yeah, I've heard about the river, the Hamilton River. Yeah, that's it. I'm a big fan of the Christchurch Gardens. Oh, yes. Yeah, yeah. I've never been to that one. Is it worth the trip? Yeah. Like, I'd go down there especially to see the gardens. Hey, fellas. You lost three that what?

45:14Keyzie:Fellas, but anyway. Oh, yeah. I'll tell you what else is happening in Hamilton tomorrow night. The Breakers are playing. Who are they playing, Keezy? Bounce, bounce, bounce, bounce. Poof.

45:24Mike Minogue:I did say it earlier, but they are taking on the Sydney Kings, and that is happening at the old Glowbox Arena in Hamilton. We've got a winner on the line here. Wayne. Wayne, are you there, man? I am. Certainly am. G'day, Wayne. It's old Keezy, Mogey, and Hoody J from The Big Show. How are you? Oh, very good, boys. What's happening?

45:42Keyzie:Oh, you know, just doing our show and stuff. Wayne, tell me, Wayne, what do you do for a crust, mate? I'm a copper. Oh! Backbone! Good on you, man. Backbone! Yeah, nice. Yeah, mate. And you like a bit of basketball action, do you, Wayne?

46:00Mike Minogue:Certainly do, Breakers. Bloody Ripper, mate. And are you free to head along tomorrow night to the Breakers game in Hamilton? Yeah, well, I live in Hamilton, so I'm free.

46:08Keyzie:Oh, how good.

46:08Mike Minogue:It's such a beautiful place, Hamilton, Wayne.

46:11Keyzie:It's such an attractive, lovely city. Do you get down to those gardens every week there, Wayne? No, no, not at all. Do you get a lot of troublemakers down there at the gardens there, man?

46:26Mike Minogue:People stealing bulbs.

46:27Keyzie:Hey, Wayne, who are you going to take with you?

46:32Mike Minogue:Well, I've got a few lads. Yeah, good. We do this men of international cuisine, so we get together every month. I like it. Go out for a feed. Nice. Oh, yeah, good. Who are the sort of fellas you've got going along there? Brother Lomas. Oh, Lomas. He's a shocking bastard when you get him on the terps, eh? Yeah, who else? He's the worst jumper. He's the worst. Who else you got there, Wayne? No, just the four of us. Good on you. Yeah, good stuff, mate.

47:01Keyzie:Well, those tickets are all yours, mate. You've got your own bench right on the sideline there. Oh, sick.

47:07Mike Minogue:I was doing my best. Jack Nicholson sitting there on the courtside. Yeah, that's right. Yeah, good. I think you're thinking of the late. Oh, no, it is the breakers, isn't it, Jack Nicholson? Yeah, you want Jack Nicholson there. Make sure you wear your sunglasses so you can have a perv like old hoody Jay. Good on you, mate. Good on you, Wayne, mate. You are the winner of the backbone bench. You get free tees sitting courtside as well. Enjoy the game, brother.

47:27Keyzie:Lovely. Cheers, boys. Thanks, mate.

47:29Mike Minogue:You just stay on the line. Old Pugsan will sort you out there. Tell me, guys, do you like Metallica? Oh. The Hauraki Big Show with Jace, Mike and Keezy. Tune in weekdays at 4 on Radio Hauraki.

47:40Keyzie:In excess there on the Radio Hauraki Big Show this Tuesday night.

47:44Mike Minogue:Hey everyone listening, text the word LAZY to 3483 to get yourself in the draw to win a brand new Lazy Boy Neo X power recliner. We've got one right here in the studio, it's got like an iPad holder, it's got a wireless charging thing, a remote to move every single aspect of it. Fully electronic, it's the first time having them in New Zealand. lazy to 3483 to get yourself in the draw to win. They're bloody amazing, mate. Remote control so you don't have to reach down the side and push the buttons. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

48:11Keyzie:Lay L-A-Z-Y.

48:15Mike Minogue:Jase, you can't enter the competition. Y-348. Why is it doing that?

48:20Keyzie:Because you're holding it upside down. Fellas, fellas. What? Just following on from food chat, actually. That was ages ago, man.

48:28Mike Minogue:We just gave away a Breakers prize between now and then.

48:30Keyzie:My wife and I were having a little discussion the other day and we've made a decision re-our eating and our food consumption. This will be good. And we've decided that we're going to make lunch the main meal of the day. Oh, yeah, like an old sort of fogey sort of. Well, this is the thing I've been taken aback by. I've said that to a few people and they were like, how old are you, Hoardy J, 80?

48:54Mike Minogue:Yeah. Whereas in actual fact you are 39.

48:58Keyzie:And I don't get it. because it makes perfect sense to me. I load up in midday and then I have my energetic work sort of afternoon. I work it all off in just a light snack for dinner. Maybe a few crackers with a bit of cheese, some chili jam and some tomatoes. You know what? That makes sense to me so I don't go to bed with a bloated, you know, belly. That's right. I mean, you'll also be going to bed much earlier than you're used to when you're a younger man. Absolutely, I am. So as a younger person, you sort of have a dinner because you'll be up sort of 11 midnight or something like that. There's no point for somebody like you.

49:36You can have a light snack at 7.30 once you get home from work and then you're in bed 7.45, 8. Yes, pretty much, yeah.

49:44Mike Minogue:Right, and then what time are you waking up?

49:46Keyzie:I'm usually waking up, you know, sort of three or four in the morning. Funny story that actually, I woke up this morning and went, that was a hell of a sleep. Right. I am absolutely fizzing about it. It was 5.30. It was 5.30 in the morning. And then I got up. And this is incredible, actually. I said to my wife the day before, you know what I'm going to start doing, darling? I'm not going to have a coffee as soon as I get up. I'm just going to just chill out and maybe wait an hour or so, maybe have a few glasses of water before I actually get into the coffee because I'm not convinced. that that's actually a really good idea.

50:30Keyzie:That's so interesting.

50:33Mike Minogue:The Hauraki Big Show. Weekdays from four on Radio Hauraki.

50:44Keyzie:Well, there you go, you mad bastards. That's the Big Show done and dusted this Tuesday evening. Now, the good news is, Ree, the podcast outro, we didn't have to put a disclaimer on this one. That's right, you guys settled right down today, thankfully. I think it's a silly season, isn't it? So you guys get filthy. Yeah, me and Jase get filthy. Yeah, we get so filthy, Keezy and I. Shock and buzz. Just on that front, Keezy, what is the clip today?

51:08Mike Minogue:It was so clean that today's clip is actually about milk. I'd have milk. In your espresso martini? Nah, just if I was at Jase, if he invited me around. Oh, yeah, a glass of milk. Can you invite me around for a glass of milk? We can't do some stuff out the back. You know, you'd get a sweat up and you'd go inside for a glass of milk. Nothing better, man. I'd have a milk moustache. Yes. And you'd go, you've got a little bit, and you'd point to your own lip, your own top lip, and I'd wipe, but I wouldn't get all of it. So you'd use your finger and you'd wipe the milk off. Here we go. And then what?

51:41Mike Minogue:I'll get the disclaimer ready. That was good, actually, because that was a real, you know, that really showed who it is that stares the podcast outro towards Phil. I just told a picture with, sort of spelled something out for people, painted a picture, if I may, with words, Jase, as you like to do. That was a sexy moment in the podcast.

52:01Keyzie:Yeah. What I've noticed with Mogi Kesey and what we've got to do. Where the hell is Mogi Kesey? Is that we can't allow him to get any momentum in the train there. You know what I mean? The filth train. Yeah, we've got to cut him off at the pass.

52:15Mike Minogue:So Mogi's the captain of the filth train.

52:17Keyzie:Yeah, he totally is. How would you cut me off at the pass? Like, I'm at the pass and I'm coming along on my horse there. You're on a train. I'm on a train and you're sort of a stranded damsel there. And cut off denims. Yeah, and you cut off denims. Why are you cut off denims? So I've hit the anchors as well straight away as soon as I've laid eyes on you because I want to help you out, you know. Oh, is he tied to the tracks? Yeah, yeah, that's right. And he's got his daisy dukes on, his little shorts there. And what am I doing? Well, you're sort of that dastardly dick dude, you know. Yeah, yeah.

52:46You're curling your moustache up going,

52:49Mike Minogue:And here comes the filth train and old Mogi's the captain. I just let it hit Jase, to be honest. Then I sort of just go back by and then play the chillies.

52:58Keyzie:Hey, now listen, Mogi, what are you up to tonight? Am I right in remembering you said you might, you know, have a little durry or something? Yeah, I think it's just another beautiful evening, man. So I'm sort of just working my way up. It's a long, silly season we've got, so I've got to start training now. Yes. So I might have a couple of darts there I might have a couple of brewskis We'll see how we go Yeah, yeah, nice That'll be it Kees, I'm not going to bother to ask what you're having for dinner Because you're going to dinner and a show tonight

53:27Mike Minogue:Yeah, I'm going to a show, Jase What are you doing?

53:30Keyzie:Let's have a little think about this

53:32Mike Minogue:Sorry, no time See you tomorrow Bye