FULL SHOW: Learn Your Lines

8:12Keyzie:Well, I didn't say that the wahs were going to be – I didn't know that.

8:16Mike Minogue:Yeah, okay, well, look.

8:18Keyzie:It's a very fun, really enjoyable direction it's going. Yeah, all I can all say is good luck, Jase, all right?

8:26Mike Minogue:Good luck. Thanks, fellas.

8:27Keyzie:You're listening to The Goat, the greatest of all-time countdown on Radio Horaki. 215. The killers smile like you mean it.

8:39Mike Minogue:The Hauraki Beat Show with Jase, Mike and Keezy. Tune in weekdays at four on Radio Hauraki.

8:45Keyzie:Yes, indeed, a bit of Jimi Hendrix there on the goat countdown coming out at number 214, fellas. I would have thought he was a little higher than that. Oh, Jimmy.

8:53Mike Minogue:Yeah, 100%, but he's got plenty of songs in the goat countdown there, Hoody J. Yeah, thank God for that. A couple more yet to play.

8:59Keyzie:Yeah, now listen, we've had a bit of a controversy with Come Dine with the Fellas. Yes. The Warriors are playing at 4 o 'clock. The dinner starts, well, the lunch starts at 2 o 'clock, and the fellas were very disgruntled about the fact that we couldn't watch the Warriors.

9:13Mike Minogue:Well, no, it's going to be great because we can watch the Warriors together or it's bad because you won't let us watch the Warriors. Yeah, that's what I mean. Exactly right. Exactly right. And, you know, Jase, you're sort of saying, oh, it's not my fault, I didn't realise, et cetera, et cetera. Part of planning a Come Dine with the Fellas event is you've got to check the calendar, brother. You've got to check the calendar. The other thing that's also going on that day is, obviously, the All Blacks will be playing. It's the second Test match. That's very early in the morning. Then at 10.30 in the morning, I've got to take my daughter to go and see the latest Paw Patrol movie.

9:44You've taken none of these things into consideration. And now you want me to also miss the Warriors as well. And I tell you, you've got a snowball's chance in hell, mate. I am watching that game. And if that means that I have to walk through your door and bring my own remote, because we've got the same TV, I'll bring my own remote from Hull home that TV is gone on at 4 o 'clock for the Waz.

10:04Keyzie:Well look, I want to tell you, I will be up at 4am prepping food in my apron there. But apparently Pugs, and this is the other consideration, it's all very well you guys banging on about it, but you've got your partners coming as well. I can imagine that they're not huge enthusiasts.

10:25Mike Minogue:Lucy is, my wife is, yeah. She doesn't want to miss the game. 100%. 100%. My wife is a New Zealander, and as a New Zealander, she is a massive Waz fan. Yeah, and actually my wife finds them all quite hot. Yeah, yeah, yeah. But the issue is we've got Pugs here who's coming along as well. G'day, Pugs. Hey, fellas, how are you?

10:44Keyzie:It's Pugs.

10:47Mike Minogue:Good to see that sting back in there. Good stuff. Pugs, how do you feel about the Waz coming on halfway through Hoity J's Come Dine With Me, which is themed Late Winter Christmas? Yeah, look, I am only one member of the judging here, so I think it's important to keep that in mind. And obviously my partner comes into consideration there as well because we are a team in this scenario. Jase, I have no issue if you want to put the Warriors on. It's your house, it's your decision, and it's your come dine with me. But if that is your entertainment, you will get a fat zero from me. Boom. Whereas you might get a 10 from me and Mogey if the wires get up.

11:24Mike Minogue:Yeah, you guys might even be out there.

11:26Keyzie:If you fellas give me a coupley tens Then that'll negate

11:31Mike Minogue:My fat zero

11:33Keyzie:Okay well this is very complicated now

11:35Mike Minogue:It is, what are you going to do man

11:37Keyzie:I'll probably watch the WARS Have you got some other entertainment Plan J's? Have I

11:45Mike Minogue:Oh boy, have I Remember Mogi took us on a tour We got to see the sinkhole at the end of his street

11:51Keyzie:Yeah that was very good, enjoyed that How are you going to beat that? Wow. This is the question, Keezy.

11:56Mike Minogue:How are you going to beat Mogi's stink hole?

12:00Keyzie:I haven't quite figured that out yet, but I'm sure it's going to be great. If I have my own entertainment and the Wiles.

12:07Mike Minogue:Not at the same time.

12:08Keyzie:I'll get a big round 10 from old Pugsun. It depends on what you do for the entertainment, man. But I'm looking forward to it.

12:16Mike Minogue:Yeah.

12:16Keyzie:Yeah, good stuff.

12:17Mike Minogue:It's not the same time as the Wiles because that would be very annoying and that would be a big fat zero for me if it was distracting.

12:22Keyzie:Planning on doing it at about four as well. I'll have to cancel on then the clown. Good luck, Hoity J. Oh, my God. Because it's a late winter Christmas day. But if you have Santa there so I can sit on his knee, that's a big fat ten, brother. Yeah, that is funny, actually. Oh, good to know.

12:43Mike Minogue:Bloody good stuff. The Hauraki Big Show. Weekdays from four on Radio Hauraki. The Radio Hauraki. Go to the countdown. Music snobbery with financial benefits.

12:58Keyzie:Yes,$100 to be exact. That's the other thing about it going so fast, fellas, is we're going to run out of money. You know, we're not going to be giving up money anymore.

13:07Mike Minogue:Well, the thing is, Jase, man, money doesn't grow on trees.

13:10Keyzie:Yeah, I guess so. You know what I mean? But just think of all the lives that we've changed during this countdown. People that have been stuck in jobs they don't like. people that have been stuck in places they don't like. They've been able to buy new properties. They've moved overseas. They've quit their jobs. They've bought islands. Generational wealth. Exactly. They can pass it on to their whānau. All of that stuff.

13:35Mike Minogue:One of the winners from last week bought some art and then gave it down to his kids. And that art is now worth$10 million. Not bad, is it? It's pretty damn pretty good. Although, you know, look, the goat's going to be over soon. End of Thursday there. But I've been talking to Bogsy, and we're going to have another huge competition coming in, fellas. Wow. You went straight to the CEO for that.

13:55Keyzie:Yeah, straight to the CEO. That's the best way to do it, Mogi, straight to the top. Thank you. Hey, let's go to the phone lines. G'day, Alan, you mad bastard. How's life? Hey, how you going, fellas? Yeah, good, thanks, mate. Good, good. How's your day in Christchurch going there, Alan? Oh, it's beautiful, mate. Yeah, nice. A bit windy.

14:12Mike Minogue:Oh, yeah. A bit windy. In Christchurch, she's always blooming windy.

14:14Keyzie:Yeah, she is pretty dry and windy down there. Yeah, but tell me, Alan, what do you do for a crust?

14:19Mike Minogue:I'm an engineer. Oh, yeah. Backbone. Backbone. What are you engineering, Alan? Oh, rocks. Oh, how good is it engineering rocks? What do you mean engineering a rock? How do you mean? What does that mean? Oh, you know, you break them up, you put them down, you build something on top of them.

14:37Keyzie:Come on, man.

14:38Mike Minogue:Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.

14:38Keyzie:It's funny you should say that because my wife and I, when we went up north the other day for a little break, We're marvelling how they basically carve massive holes into mountainsides It's quite a feat Yeah, that was Alan Or was that you, Alan, that did that?

14:53Mike Minogue:Yeah, a bit on the side Yeah, good on you, Alan

14:56Keyzie:Yeah, you're a back man Well, I tell you what, mate You're$100 richer How does that sound?

15:01Mike Minogue:Oh, how good Thanks very much No worries, Alan You hold the line there And old Pugs will give you a good seeing too, alright? Yeah, yeah

15:07Keyzie:Good on you, mate

15:08Mike Minogue:Bloody hell, lucky you fell$100 just like that

15:12Keyzie:hundy bones. I mean, he could have been having a really sucky day and now he's just like, it's just all turned around. You could put that away and just think of the interest. You could live off the interest. Yes. How much interest would you get in that? People don't think about that. Like a dollar a year? Well, you're sort of looking at your three, four and a half percent, so it could be anywhere up to three bucks, four bucks. But you could live on two. But then there'll be, obviously, you'd have to deal with your... Your tax. Your bank charges, et cetera, et cetera.

15:41Mike Minogue:You could end up with about eight bucks left over. That's not bad. Far out, man. That's good stuff, isn't it?

15:46Keyzie:That's good eating. The Goat, it's music's ultimate scoreboard on Radio Hauraki. 212, Tame Impala, the less I know the better.

15:58Mike Minogue:The Hauraki Big Show, weekdays from four on Radio Hauraki.

16:02Keyzie:Nirvana there, heart-shaped box coming in at number 211, fellas.

16:07Mike Minogue:Do you know what that song's about?

16:10Keyzie:Love?

16:10Mike Minogue:Yeah, yeah, that's it.

16:11Keyzie:This guy gets it. Yeah, thanks, man. Shall we talk TV? What's on the telly with Mike Minogue?

16:22Woo! Yes! Yeah! I watched a miniseries called, it's on Netflix, Keezy. Oh, yeah. It's called Who Killed Jill Dando? Do you remember her, Jase? Yes. She is a British television presenter. Oh, yeah. And she went home one day and she was murdered on her doorstep. And they never found the killer. It was a huge mystery. She was the most popular television presenter in the United Kingdom at the time. Huge mystery around it. I sort of got about three quarters of the way through the first episode. Interesting stuff, but it was three episodes. And I knew for a fact that they didn't know who the killer was.

17:05So really, what are they going to tell me? What am I going to learn that I didn't already know? So I turned it off and watched a bit more Alone on TVNZ+. Oh, yeah. How's Shay doing? Shay's living on a diet of worms at the moment.

17:21Mike Minogue:And this is the reality show where they dropped in the middle of Tasmania with nothing. In winter, it's two degrees. Yeah, and there's a New Zealand possum trapper on there called Shay, whom I really like. But he's literally surviving on plates of worms. Ew. Yes. That's so gross.

17:39Keyzie:Yeah, man. You've got to do what you've got to do in that situation, Keezy. And he's very, I've got to say, he's very funny. Yes. Very deadpan. I mean, he's by himself just taping and recording himself as he goes along. He's very, I really like him. Yeah, he's a very likeable character. My wife and I watched a documentary last night called Betrayal. Betrayal. And it's based, it's a program that's also a podcast. And the story last night was about a woman whose husband... Straight away you're annoyed.

18:11Mike Minogue:He hates it.

18:13Keyzie:Whose husband was a cop. Right. And just a great all-round guy. He was a backbone.

18:19Mike Minogue:And did she betray him?

18:21Keyzie:Or was he? Hang on a minute.

18:26Keyzie:It went on and on and on and on. I know the feeling. And he had a bit of shagging outside of the marital sort of set up. Is that still frowned upon? That. In some countries. Nah. That was the story.

18:45Mike Minogue:About who's shagging.

18:46Keyzie:Yeah. Well, I won't get into specifics of what was happening because it gets a bit sexy. Right. The shagging.

18:56Mike Minogue:But just stupid. How many buzzies?

18:58Keyzie:I was just like, why are we watching this, darling? And she was like, I don't even know. This is just dumb. Meh. One buzzy. One buzzy out of five. Yes. That's your last in a while. Reluctantly one buzzy.

19:11Mike Minogue:Wow, betrayal. Last night, fellas, I was watching season one of Outrageous Fortune. First time I've ever seen it. My wife and I are both loving it. Last night's episode, what's the name of the elder daughter who wants to be a model? Oh, yeah. The one that Siobhan plays her. Pascal Pascal yes She starts seeing This TV personality Who looks Because this show Was made in the early 2000s Very early 2000s Style TV personality Right Honestly if I had to say Who it kind of looked like Simon Barnett Oh wow That style Aviator glasses Popped Ralph Lauren polo shirt With the popped collar And like bleach blonde Spiky hair Yeah good And he was like The hottest guy out And I was just like Classic Very funny episode yet again Honestly every episode they keep weaving new characters In and out and it just keeps getting better and better Absolutely love it Who cares just watch it TVNZ Plus Every episode's there

20:08Keyzie:Beautiful let's go back to the countdown number 210 The Goat

20:14Mike Minogue:You know we've got the goat here Everybody piss off

20:16Keyzie:The countdown for real music connoisseurs On Radio Hauraki 210 David Bowie Fame

20:27Mike Minogue:The Hauraki Big Show with Jace, Mike and Keezy. Tune in weekdays at 4 on Radio Hauraki.

20:33Keyzie:Welcome back, Immersive Backbones. Hope you're getting through your Tuesday afternoon. You are listening to The Big Show, brought to you by ReBurger.

20:40Mike Minogue:Handcrafted burgers, loaded fries and gourmet eats that will change the game. Yum, yum, yum, yum, yum, yum, yum, yum, yum. And a quick reminder, fellas, to head into your local ReBurger and try the brand new Chop House Burger. That's the one with smoky Louisiana-rubbed pure New Zealand beef, cheese, streaky bacon, lettuce, tomato, onion, resource, and from today and for the rest of the week, free fries if you order that burger. Do you like it when people are rubbing spices on your meat, Jase?

21:04Keyzie:Yeah, I like a bit of a spice on my meat for sure.

21:07Mike Minogue:Yeah. When you cook a steak. Who? When you guys cook a steak, do you put the oil on the steak or the oil on the pan? Well, the first thing you've got to do, Keese, and you'll know this, Jase, is you get a little bit of your oil there and you put it across the steak on both sides. A little bit of salt, a little bit of pepper on both sides. You've got to give it a good 20 minutes plus for that to settle in there. Because I was told not to put pepper on it because it burns. That's absolute rubbish. Who told you that? I think it was Al Brown.

21:40Keyzie:I don't eat steak.

21:42Mike Minogue:Oh.

21:44Keyzie:Do you cook it? I cook it beautifully. Yeah, yeah. I don't eat it.

21:47Mike Minogue:So you'll cook steak and then what do you do with it?

21:49Keyzie:My wife eats it. Yeah, right. I go out of my way because just because I don't eat something doesn't mean that my and she likes a good steak. But all she gets is yours. So I'll put a bit of a rub on it. The only thing burnt more than your steak is your milk when you're making her a coffee.

22:10Mike Minogue:And it's always just beautiful. The greyest, thinnest bit of schnitzel almost. It's been cooked for like 20 minutes. It's a porterhouse cheddar. Anyway, sounds good. Yeah, thanks, fellas. Yeah, yeah. Hey, should we get back to the countdown?

22:26Keyzie:The Goat. This is one of the greatest. It's like the Michelin guide for music. On Radio Hauraki. 209. Oasis. Don't look back in anger.

22:37Mike Minogue:The Hauraki Big Show. Weekdays from four on Radio Hauraki.

22:41Keyzie:Incubus there on the Hauraki countdown, the Goat countdown this Tuesday afternoon. Great tune.

22:49Mike Minogue:Great tune coming in at 208. But fellas, tomorrow I've got an audition for an ad, a commercial. A TVC. A TVC it's called in the bizzo, Jase. Yeah, man. That's what you call it. And I'm, to be honest, I'm kind of regretting saying yes to the audition. Right. Because it's one of those things that hangs over me. Yes, that's right. I don't mind MCing a big event in front of people. I don't mind that sort of stuff. I don't mind live radio, live TV. For some reason, an audition with a random person I've never met in a small room and they've got a camcorder and I have to remember lines and do acting.

23:20Mike Minogue:I hate it. It's when you go in there, isn't it, Jase? You sort of go into the waiting room. You have to go in there and you have to fill out a piece of paper, you know, with your name and who your agent is and your measurements and all these sorts of things. And you're just hoping that, you know, a plane's going to crash into the building. There's some reason why you can't go in there. There's a horrible feeling in your guts. Yeah. There might be somebody else in the waiting room. You think, oh, that person will be really good at this. I'm going to be really bad. And then you get in there and then you just absolutely humiliate yourself.

23:50Yeah, totally.

23:50Mike Minogue:That's certainly been my experience in the past. In fact, I've auditioned for certain ads and then seen the ads come out and then gone, wow, I am glad I didn't get that. Yeah, well, what's interesting is the first couple you did, Keezy, you got callbacks, didn't you? Yeah, I got a callback. So I don't know what's happening. Your callback is when you go in there, there's hundreds of people that go for it and then they're like, oh, we like this short list of people. Let's get them back. And then you make your final decision from there. And your very first two auditions, Keezy, I remember, but you got shortlisted and we thought, jeez, this guy's on a skyrocket to success.

24:24Of course, you represented him at that stage as his agent, Jason. God, he's just been an absolute, you know, not to talk in front of you, behind your back here, Keith, but just the wheels have come off. Yeah, thanks, mate.

24:34Keyzie:I mean, have you thought about not doing it?

24:38Mike Minogue:Yes, a lot. Yeah. Like a lot. Yeah, yeah.

24:41Keyzie:Perfectly normal. What I found really useful in that particular situation, because there are a lot of nerves and anxiety, I just say no

24:51Mike Minogue:Yes See that I wanted to say no But I'm scared of my agent Yeah And I worry That my agent's Going to get grumpy at me So I say yes And it's like a short term relief Long term fuming Yeah So tomorrow I've got this thing And it's an ad where I'm like this guy And I'm meant to be cool In a bar

25:09Keyzie:Well that's never going to work You know Sort of miscast Yeah yeah What were they thinking Got that wrong

25:16Mike Minogue:Well it's a guy in a suit and I'm in a bar and I'm just delivering lines down the camera in a kind of cool way. Okay. And it's for a health insurance company called Be Sure Insure. Well, it feels like we should be doing this as an actual audition. Do you know what I mean? We should actually – you should come into the room and we'll welcome you in because you normally have somebody that reads the lines, somebody who's operating the camera, and then you can sort of go through and we give you notes. It feels like the only way to do it. Fine. Okay, we can do this. Okay, we'll do that next.

25:46Keyzie:That's going to be good. Yeah, good stuff. I'm looking forward to it. In the meantime.

25:49Mike Minogue:Honestly, I'm dreading tomorrow.

25:51Keyzie:Here's number 207 in the go. As voted by the Hauraki Faithful. Your greatest of all time countdown. 207. Queen, we will rock you.

26:06Mike Minogue:The Hauraki Big Show with Jace, Mike and Keezy. Tune in weekdays at four on Radio Hauraki.

26:13Keyzie:Guns. Roses there on the Hodaki countdown Coming in at number 206

26:19Mike Minogue:That's right, the goat Fellas, I've got an audition for an ad tomorrow I'm freaking out because The last audition I did really scarred me I haven't done another one Like a year since I was supposed to dance and sing And play silly buggers And I left there being like This is the worst thing I've ever done in my life But I've been asked to do another audition It's happening tomorrow And you guys have offered to Basically run me through an audition improv styles so that I will be less worried tomorrow.

26:47Keyzie:Quiet on set. Sound speed. Lights. Camera.

26:52Mike Minogue:Action. Now it's time for the Big Show Improv. So the scene is, fellas, I'm like a cool guy in a bar wearing a suit, supposed to be anyway, and I'm just delivering lines down the barrel, down the camera, about this health insurance company called Be Sure Insure.

27:12Keyzie:Well, the first thing I would suggest, Keezy, and my first advice to you, have a couple of beersies. Really? It's at 11am. Just to chill out, you know, Uber in. Yeah. Uber into the audition. Two or three beersies. Three now. Because I reckon that's your sort of sweet spot. The Goldilocks zone, three beers. Yeah, so there's the nerves gone. Does that mean if I book the job,

27:34Mike Minogue:I'd have to be on the beers that day as well? Well, you'll deal with that after. Yeah, it doesn't. If you get the job. People expect that. Okay. So let's make it that you're coming into the room there, Keezy. Jason and I are running the audition. You'll just knock on the door. Yep. And we'll take it from there. All right. Ready? Yep.

27:55Knock this again.

27:58Mike Minogue:Hello? Chris Key here for my audition. Oh, g'day, Chris. Sorry, we're in this other room over here. You got the wrong room, mate. Oh, sorry.

28:08Keyzie:Well, you don't need to knock again. We've already seen you. Come on in. Come on in. Good to see you. Hi, hi. Sorry about that. Okay, great. Sorry we're running a little bit, mate. Look, I'm all a fluster here. A little bit late, mate. I too. Don't worry. This is my off-sider, Jase. He'll be running the camera for you. Hey, mate. G'day, mate. We just need to get a few details from you up front. So just write on the board there, just write your name and who your agent is, and then we'll just get some profiles and everything. If you just scan down there, and we'll just get some shots of you there.

28:39Keyzie:Okay, how's this? Yeah, that's good. I'm just going to headshot there. Actually, I might just back that off a bit.

28:46Mike Minogue:Yeah, cool. That's good. And then profiles. Okay, what's that? Just to the left. Okay, how's this? Cool. Oh, really. It's really standing out. And then to the right, all the way. Profile to the right. Right, okay. Whoa. I don't know what we can do. Anyway, that's okay. Okay, great. Well, if you just want to give the board back to Jason. Sorry, I think.

29:06Keyzie:Here you go. Just hold on a sec there. Is it Chris? I think my camera must be a bit wonky. There we go. Sorry about that. Okay, so obviously you know your script. Jase will do any offlines that might be required. It's pretty much just you doing a monologue. There's a bit of action in the script, but we're just going to get rid of that. Really all you need to do is just deliver it pretty much down the barrel. Okay, cool.

29:31Mike Minogue:You say when and I'll kick into it. We won't say when. Generally we'll say action. You'll find that's universal. And if you do get the part, they won't say when on set either. They'll say action. Okay, good to know. I suppose they'll say cut afterwards. I'd concentrate if I was here. Oh, yeah. Sorry, just nervous. All right. Action. Ha. I don't need help. I was going to stop you there, actually. I've literally just started.

29:59Keyzie:Down the barrel, if you don't mind, mate.

30:01Mike Minogue:Oh, the camera? Yeah, yeah. Sorry, I was confused. You sit down the barrel and there's a barrel in the corner and I was actually just looking at the barrel. No, no. But you mean the camera? Yeah, the camera. Thank you. Oh, okay, yeah, okay. Here we go. You ready? Say when. Take two, is it? Mm, right. Yep, all right. Take two. Action. Ha, I don't need health insurance. That's what they all say. Until they do. Next thing you know, boom, something unexpected happens in your strap. What? I mean - Look, I don't really want to give you a direction because this should be your performance, but boom, you can see on the script there, it's in capital letters, so it's got to be, you know, boom.

30:36Boom.

30:37Mike Minogue:Okay. Here we go. Ha. I don't need health insurance. That's what they all say. Until they do. Next thing you know. Boom! What?

30:48Keyzie:Sorry, I stopped you there. Sorry, I had a bit of a pop with the boom. What do you mean?

30:52Mike Minogue:I'll split the diff. Okay, right. Ha. I don't need health insurance. That's what they all say. I'll just stop you there. Okay. Why? I just want to see it a bit better. Okay, that's just really shit. No, no, you're doing a great job. I'll just stop you there. Okay. You're doing a great job, man. Thank you. Really good. Okay. It's good for the client to be able to see people of all abilities. Yeah, totally. The Hauraki Big Show with Jace, Mike and Keezy. Tune in weekdays at four on Radio Hauraki. The Radio Hauraki Goat Countdown. When being a music connoisseur pays off.

31:37Keyzie:Yeah, sure does. To the tune of$100, fellas. That's the best tune at the end of the day.

31:42Mike Minogue:Yes. You know what I mean? Yeah. Doesn't matter how many great songs there are, $100 cash, boom, number one. Yeah.

31:48Keyzie:It's a tune that sings to me, Keezy. Well said, Jase. Thank you.

31:53Mike Minogue:Thanks, man. Do you like the tune, Mogi? I've got no sort of play on words around this, unfortunately, but I like the idea of you sort of dancing around to a fortune. Jase, that's good stuff. Yeah, nice. The idea of Jay sort of dancing around while I'm sort of waving$100 notes at him. Oh. And he's sort of in his neck. Yeah, yeah, that's good, actually. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Dance, dance. Dance, dance. If you want those$100, you better dance for it. That's right. Sunday Arvo, Keezy.

32:19Keyzie:Is that what we're doing? Sunday Arvo, mate. Can't wait. Should we go to the lines, mate? Yeah, let's do it. G'day, William Adbasset. How's life? Yeah, good, mate. Good. Good on you, mate. How's Dunedin today? Yeah, perfect, mate. Perfect weather. It's beautiful. It's a stunner. Yeah, a stunner. Tell me, what do you do for a crust, Will? I'm a community sport advisor. Oh, yeah. Backbone. Backbone. What does that mean? Does that mean you just go down and see random people playing sports? Like, let's say the kids game of rugby on and you shout at them to go faster, tackle harder.

32:56Mike Minogue:Yeah, a little bit like that, but mainly working with organizations around the community, really, in different regions. Oh, it's backbone shit, Will. Would you like$100 cash, man? Yes, please. Yeah, well, it's all yours, man, because you said please. Congrats. Yeah, boy. Good on you, mate. How good. Hey, Will, you hold the line, and Pugs will give you a damn good scene too, all right? All right. Bless you, brother. Good on you, mate. You enjoy the$100, Will. So good, man. Bloody good. Of course, another chance to win$100 tomorrow, all day on Hodaki, and the day after that as well. Man, I think we've given away now.

33:33I was just working it out over the course of the goat. I think it's been gone for just a couple of few weeks there, whatever you're doing. $8 million. Yeah. Isn't that unreal? Well, it's not quite at 8 mil yet, but I think by the end of Thursday, which is when the goat wraps up.

33:48Mike Minogue:We would have given away$8 million. Yeah, yeah. It's life-changing, man.

33:52Keyzie:It really is. It's extraordinary.

33:55Mike Minogue:I can't believe it, fellas.

33:56Keyzie:You better believe it. Hey. What? Speaking of the goat, should we get back into it?

34:01Mike Minogue:Yeah, man.

34:03Keyzie:Gentlemen, this is The Ghost.

34:09Mike Minogue:The Hauraki Big Show with Jase, Mike and Keezy. Tune in weekdays at four on Radio Hauraki.

34:15Keyzie:Welcome back, you massive backbones. I hope your Tuesday is absolutely going off. You're listening to The Big Show, by the way, brought to you by Reburger.

34:24Mike Minogue:Serving good times and good food. Dine-in or takeaway Reburger today.

34:29Keyzie:Scrum-diddly-umptious. Now, I understand, Moggy, you have a bit of an event tonight. I do. Will they have snacks? I understand that they're going to have knapes. Oh, nice. I love a knap. And possibly even a meal of a more significant serving size. I mean. So I'm looking forward to that as well. I don't know. Not sure if it's a seated event. But regardless, I'll be there. I'll be stuffing my face there. Yeah, you're good. Get a few drinks in before I have to get up on stage there. Yeah, good. Give a few people a bit of a dressing down, tell them what for, et cetera, et cetera. And yeah, as well as.

35:06You've got to get up there and give them a spray. Yeah, that's right. Spraying them. Backbone, backbone, hashtag backbone.

35:13Keyzie:Yeah, nice. Sounds good, man. I'll be stoked. You said you had an atrocity for dinner last night, a pork salad.

35:20Mike Minogue:I had a pork salad. It was very nice. It was a good meal to have after a bougie weekend of eating cheese and red wine. Nice food, yeah. You said it brought you right back down to earth. Did I say that? Yeah, you did. I felt great afterwards. But tonight, even better, guess what we're having tonight? Stuffed capsicums. So you get a capsicum and you just stuff it full of mints. Yeah. Did you have some leftover mints from your pork salad? No, no, that was like a pork steak. This is just pork mints. Right, okay. Because, you know, we like to eat the pork in different ways. Yeah. Pork three ways? Have you ever had that?

35:56Mike Minogue:No, sounds great. A pork three way. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

35:59Keyzie:Sunday Arvo, Mogey. Sunday Arvo, mate. Ten from me.

36:04Mike Minogue:That's ten from me. Jase, what are you having tonight, man?

36:06Keyzie:I don't know. I don't know. I don't know that my wife's been to the super today. We don't really have much in stock. Oh. So I'm baffled by what we're going to eat tonight. No, no, certainly not. No, I had that on Saturday.

36:25Mike Minogue:You'll dine out though, won't you?

36:26Keyzie:No, probably Uber.

36:28Mike Minogue:Uber eat something? Yeah, right, okay. Good stuff. Hey, well, exciting news for people out there. The last song of the goat countdown for them right now, fellas. 201. Should we rip in? Let's go. The Hauraki Big Show with Jace, Mike and Keezy. Tune in weekdays at four on Radio Hauraki.

36:46Keyzie:Yes, indeed. 201, a bit of Pearl Jam for you, fellas. And that brings us to the end of the countdown just for today. Now, if you were sort of busy throughout the day, maybe you didn't have the radio on. I always come in a little bit earlier when the goat's on, put together a little bit of a montage of, I guess you could say the sort of highlights of what we've played across the day.

37:08Mike Minogue:Oh, is that the one that I've got here to play?

37:10Keyzie:Yeah, that's the one, Kesey. Number 300, Pearl Jam, elderly woman behind the counter. All these changes take place. Number 290, Talking Heads, Psycho Killer.

37:32Keyzie:280, Exponents, Victoria

37:39Keyzie:Number 270, Metallica, The Unforgiven

37:48Keyzie:Number 260, She Hard, Run

37:58Keyzie:250 temper trap sweet disposition

38:09Mike Minogue:number 240 living color cult and personality

38:17Keyzie:230 stone temple pilots sex type thing

38:25I know you like what's on my mind.

38:29Keyzie:220. Weezer, say it ain't so. Say it ain't so. Your job is a heartbreaker. 210. David Bowie, fame. Fame, make a command. Take things over. 201. Pearl Jam, given to fly. A human being, I must give up You

39:01Keyzie:Yes indeed, great stuff fellas We're really counting down quick as

39:07Mike Minogue:200 songs left to go fellas It gets underway 8am tomorrow morning On the Hodoki Breakfast Show More cash to be won as well I'm going to be sad when the countdown's done and dusted Yeah so am I You've been loving it haven't you Yeah I've been really loving it Mogi I don't know if you've noticed that I have been just, oh. You would have noticed this, Jase. He's been thrown up his goat horns. Yes. He comes and he goes, yeah. Goat's up, baby. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Pretty cool. Yeah, it's pretty cool. Actually, Pugs told me to do that. Apparently, it's a cool thing people are doing now. Right, is it? Because of the goat countdown, yeah, yeah.

39:42Keyzie:Yeah, yeah. No, it has been fantastic. It's just going to intensify over the next couple of days. Yeah, yeah, man. So don't be turning those bloody radios off. And don't throw away your chance to win$100.

39:55Mike Minogue:Yeah. The Hauraki Big Show with Jase, Mike and Keezy. Tune in weekdays at 4 on Radio Hauraki.

40:02Keyzie:Yes, indeed. The Red Heart. Chilli peppers there on the Hauraki Big Show this Tuesday evening. Now, fellas, I think it's pretty fair to say I'm known for my fashion.

40:14Mike Minogue:Yeah. That's what it is. I knew there was something different about you. you're not wearing your two-tone jersey today. Yes. You've been wearing that every day for a fortnight.

40:23Keyzie:I'm wearing what I call my buzzy hugger. Yeah, yeah. My black top, which really, you know, I've got to be honest with you. Hugs the buzies. It hugs the buzies. It cups the buzies. Yes. And hugs the gut. And it seems to drag the buzies sort of down and out to the sides. Yeah, it sort of spreads them out. But I was having a, you know, because I like to sort of change it, you know, my wacky shirts and stuff. I can't wait for summer because I've got some real do's. You know, I have my lemon shirt. I've got my bird shirt. The other bird shirt. My Chinese shirt. Oh, that's a shocker, that one.

40:57Mike Minogue:Don't wear that one, please.

40:58Keyzie:And I was thinking a look that I've always wanted to sort of run with and experiment with is the old braces. Not on your teeth, the braces over your shoulder holding up your tweed pants. Nice. Because I reckon. We could change your pants. I reckon I could pull it off. No, I'd run with my tight denims as per.

41:16Mike Minogue:Do they stay up, though?

41:17Keyzie:I know, but it's more of a lock easy rather than, you know, a practical holding them up. You know, I could bring my cheese cutter back. I agree. Have braces. Yeah. I reckon it would rock. Can I add something to your look? Yeah, sure. I'd have the braces over the top of a white T-shirt. There you go. I'd have a packet of darts rolled up in the sleeve of the T-shirt. Thank you, mate. You've got the vision I've got. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And then I'd also have, you know, you're probably going to have to get some sleeve tattoos to really set the look off. Yes. You know, something like backbone, backbone, hashtag backbone.

41:53Actually, I've been thinking of getting a sleeve as well. Yeah, that's right. I'm getting it up. We were talking about this as well, Kesey. Jase is considering, this is very smart, of getting a sleeve that looks like a sleeve on a shirt. So it's got the cuff, it's got the hem along the inside, it's got a button at the end. How good's that? But it's a tattoo. But it's a tattoo. So it's a sleeve of a sleeve. It's ink kesey.

42:15Mike Minogue:Right, and would that be on your arm? Yes, obviously. Yeah, yeah, yeah, great.

42:20Keyzie:So I could have that tattoo sleeve, my braces, a white T-shirt, Siggy's rolled up in my T-shirt there. Cheese cutter. It's kind of sexy, you know. Cheese cutter. My wife could walk, I might start smoking a pipe as well. Yeah. You know what I mean? I thought you'd been smoking pipe for years. a pipe. Oh, yeah.

42:46Mike Minogue:Pearl jam.

42:47Keyzie:But what do you think, though? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Smoke whatever you want. Smoke whatever you want, man.

42:53Mike Minogue:The Hauraki Big Show with Jace, Mike and Keezy. Tune in weekdays at four on Radio Hauraki.

42:59Keyzie:In excess there on the Hauraki Big Show this Tuesday evening, but we have breaking news.

43:09This is breaking news. That's right, fellas. This came to my attention about eight days ago. That's not breaking, is it? Well, nobody's said anything about it, though. So I am breaking the news to you. Right? You guys don't know about it.

43:23Mike Minogue:It's just when I do this, you guys are like, oh, this is old, Keezy. It's just how you frame it, Keezy. It's all in how you frame it. And the other thing I'd like to do is I'd like to do a little bit of a role play. Keezy, take your pants off. Just kidding, man. This one, I'd like you to pretend that you're the board of a school. and there's been an incident in the school and I want you to decide what you're going to do about this incident. A board member, head of the board. What am I? You're also on the board. It's a big board. Most of the money from the school that should be going towards the children mostly goes towards the board.

43:54Board members. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Sweet, I like that. A long-serving school IT manager, yes, made a joke to a student involved in a car crash with a cyclist And that comment, he said, you should have backed up and finished him off. Okay? Okay? So this fella worked at the school for 23 years. This incident happens where a kid accidentally collides with another student who is riding a bicycle. The kid who was driving the car was quite emotional about it. And to make this kid feel better, this particular IT manager takes the kid into a room where he can see a replay of the footage of what he did. Security footage.

44:37Security footage. It wasn't that bad, mate. Sure, he's been chucked in an ambulance and he's been taken away to hospital. But it's not that bad. Yeah, right. So he shows him this. You see the footage of the car rounding the corner before colliding with the student on the bicycle. The kid suffers minor injuries, taken to hospital. Then when he plays this back for him to try and cheer the kid up there, he says, yes, you should have backed up and finished him off. Now, it was accepted by this particular IT manager that it was an attempt at black humor to lighten the mood and the joke did not land at all.

45:16Yeah. It absolutely killed any kind of mood in the room. And the IT manager accepted that neither student laughed or engaged with the remark at all. And indeed, one of the students complained to the principal about the comment. Sounds like my stand-up career. Yeah, that's right. Just sort of a dead room. Yeah. So there was a complaint. It went to the board. A car crash. You're on the board. What do you do, Keezy, in an instant? How do you... And so what happened to him? He was... Well, we don't know. Oh, okay. I'm asking you what you would do, and then I'll tell you what actually happened to him.

45:49Mike Minogue:The first thing I'd say is, why are you showing the kid footage of him in a car crash? He doesn't want to relive that. Yeah. Well, no, he specifically wanted to. Oh, he would she ask. To make him feel better. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Well, I'd say, look, mate, bad taste. Maybe don't do it again. and maybe I'd say, hey, suspended without pay, wink, wink, two weeks. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Two weeks, thank you. Did not catch you going overseas to Fiji or something? Thank you. Wink, wink. Yep. That's pretty severe. That's good. I mean, yeah. 23 years. I would say backbone.

46:17Keyzie:Right, you like that? That was actually a really funny joke and what a hard audience. Tough crowd, tough crowd. But good on you, mate. You know, you tried to lighten the load. You tried to make a difficult situation humorous. Good on you. Backbone.

46:31Mike Minogue:But he made a joke about running over a student.

46:32Keyzie:Well, yeah, but I mean, come on. Students love that sort of chat. It's a little bit of a joke. You're not saying to somebody, are you? I mean, I don't think. Actually, you should have backed. I mean, if he actually meant it, that would be an issue. Exactly. So what happened to him? He got fired. Oh. He got put on leave, as you said, Kesey, suspended on pay, following further meetings, was dismissed for serious misconduct, and the Employment Relations Authority has found the dismissal was justified. Wow. Thank God you've weeded out that absolute bastard from the teaching ranks, eh?

47:06Mike Minogue:The Hauraki Beat Show with Jase, Mike and Keezy. Tune in weekdays at four on Radio Hauraki.

47:25Keyzie:Well, there you go, you mad bastards. That's my, I do that, Keezy. Don't ever do that again. It's just a joke. Hey, Indy. There you go, you mad bastards, Indy. Oh, that sounds good, baby.

47:38Mike Minogue:Oh, does it? Hey, in the podcast outro today, we talked about how scared someone was.

47:43Keyzie:No, it's not the podcast outro.

47:45Mike Minogue:Oh, that's right. It's called the disclaimer. Yes. Come on, man. Comes out at 7.30 tonight. Here's a clip.

47:51Keyzie:I'm terrified of my wife. It doesn't feel much better to have said that out loud. Can I ask a question? Maybe this is best reserved for the show proper. Sure, but we can bring it back up on the show proper. We can, we can, we can. What's your plan this weekend? You're doing all the cooking yourself? Mate, I am deep in it. That's not a answer.

48:16Yeah, man. Yeah. Yum, yum. What? I can't believe you're just going to grab a couple of bachelor's handbags from the local Coles. Yeah, but. Bit of slaw. Fresh buns.

48:30Mike Minogue:Yum. Mum, I actually love that shit. Yeah, I know you do, Keezy. You could get one split chicken for me.

48:36Keyzie:Yes, and maybe a bowl of pork mince.

48:39Mike Minogue:Yeah, true. I had pork salad last night. Oh, yeah.

48:42Keyzie:Well, we'll get to that. What are you doing tonight, Moggy? Just coughing. Jesus, you all G, man? I've actually got to go to an event. Oh, right, yes. I've got to get up on stage and talk off the cuff for about five minutes, which I've got to be honest, I'm not particularly looking forward to. Off the cuff?

48:58Mike Minogue:You struggle with that because all this show is scripted. I know, exactly. That's what I'm saying. So, yeah, I don't know. We'll see how that goes. But no matter what happens, if it goes well, it goes well. The business is in a better state. If it goes badly, it's content for tomorrow's show. Yeah, exactly, mate. Hopefully it's the second one.

49:14Keyzie:How was your pork salad last night, Keezy?

49:17Mike Minogue:Thanks for asking. It was actually yummer than I anticipated, and I told my wife that you guys were like, pork salad. Yeah. And then the good news is tonight's dinner is going to be just as good. It was yum. Yeah, yeah. How was your re-burger, Jase?

49:29Keyzie:It was really young. Thank you. Do you even need to ask that question?

49:33Mike Minogue:Yes, because you don't ever get it. You say you're going to get it, then you don't.

49:36Keyzie:It was very nice. Thank you. And that new burger that they brought out is an absolute winner. Chop House. Chop House, yeah. Get stuck into it. And the fries. Wow, what do I say? Now listen, check out the Instagram. Yeah, what else? Hodaki Big Show.

49:55Mike Minogue:And the podcasts.

49:56Keyzie:and we'll be back same time same place tomorrow till then goodbye yeah