FULL SHOW: Old Moodey-J

10:18Keyzie:Yeah Eh? Eh? My wife has plates like that You know what I mean? And she's got friends that buy her plates like that It's not the sort of thing that I don't want to make generalisations here It's more of a thing that you give a mum rather I mean, would you give a dad plates with birds on it or cows? 100 %

10:39Mike Minogue:Yeah, I mean, I don't know why we're being sexist about it. But you like plates.

10:44Keyzie:Oh, no. What do you think it's plates, man? I like plates to eat off, but I just, I'm not a big hang it on the wall kind of. You don't put plates on the wall? I mean, I don't. I mean, I don't want to be. But you're saying women do. Well, just my vibe is with plates is that it's more of a female type activity. What if it had something on it like, I don't know, Repco? Oh, yeah. I'd have that in my man cave next to my calendars.

11:15Mike Minogue:You buzzy calendars. Just by the way, so the text machine, right? You pick out a few texts and you put a little star next to it. And then you can click a button that says, oh, just show me the starred text, the text that you've highlighted. What the hell happened on Friday, fellas? Don't know. Just going through the texts that were favourited on Friday. You've lost the meaning of throbbers. Absolutely shit.

11:36Keyzie:Oh, yeah, we had a show. I mean, I won. Need we say more?

11:40Mike Minogue:Just jumped in the car. What is this shit? Don't tell me Hoody J won. This bee boop stuff sucks. All three sucked, fellas. What the hell is this Hoody J? What? Can we get back to the question at hand here, Keezy? Mother's Day stuff? Yeah. I want to be honest. The Hodaki faithful sound like they barely did anything for their mums. Yes. And, I mean, I haven't called my mum yet, but I will.

12:02Keyzie:I know a lot of the Hodaki faithful, where the young bucks probably took their washing over and stuff, then, you know, their mums probably cleaned it for them and they probably ate her food. Yes. You know, and they drank her beersies, asked for some money, asked for a loan. Mums love that, though. Mums love that. Do they?

12:20Mike Minogue:Don't they? I think so. They're in a vacuum cleaner. The Hauraki Big Show with Jace, Mike and Kesey. Tune in weekdays at four on Radio Hauraki.

12:30Keyzie:Man, I love that song so much, fellas. It's June. Ozzy Osbourne. Mama, I'm coming home.

12:38Mike Minogue:I think it's to celebrate Mother's Day yesterday. Oh, is that what it was? Yeah, yeah, yeah.

12:42Keyzie:Yeah, well, there had to be some kind of reason to play that travesty. Sorry. Just a bit grumpy at the moment, fellas. But I'll get into that after five. Okay. But I had a bit of a weekend of it. And I suspect, before I tell you about this, this is something that Mogi will be able to relate to, probably less so you, Keezy.

13:03Mike Minogue:Right, okay.

13:03Keyzie:Because you tend to be more anal.

13:05Mike Minogue:Right, is it something to do with having a massive honker or something?

13:08Keyzie:No, no, no. It's something to do with being organised. Oh, yeah. Because we went to the old family batch over the weekend, and my wife and I woke up in Saturday morning and said, should we do it? And we went, yeah, man, let's do it. Man, this is a great yarn. Actually, have you got the great yarn music?

13:28Mike Minogue:Yeah, I've got it here, man. Keep going.

13:31Keyzie:And?

13:32Mike Minogue:No, you concentrate on the kids.

13:33Keyzie:So anyway, the great thing about no kids with us is that it's just me and her. It's really easy. It's really simple. Back in the day, we'd have to almost get like four-car convoy going to get all their shit in there. You are grumpy, aren't you? It's just me and her, and off we go into the sunset. We pack the bag. Douche. Just sort of like a deathly silence there. Went to the supermarket and had our normal debacle where we, what am I going to eat? It was like, ah! Just ended up buying a smoked kaha wine, made a smoked fish pie, which was delicious. But that's all we took. We were there a day and a half.

14:12Keyzie:It's smoked fish pie. That was it. Right. Anyway. It's your fault. You know that, eh? So true story, we get to the batch and I go into the bag that we've packed and I go, hang on.

14:24Mike Minogue:So you've packed one bag between you?

14:26Keyzie:Yeah, well, we're only there for a night. We don't need like heaps. Come on, man. Come on, man. That makes total sense.

14:32Mike Minogue:How many bags do you want me to take, Keezy? Oh, I thought maybe more than one bag and one fish pie.

14:38Keyzie:So I'm going through the bag and I pull out my T-shirt and I'm going, where's all my other stuff? What the hell have I? And I realised that the only thing I'd packed was my T-shirt. Was it a backbone T-shirt? It was a backbone T-shirt. That's all you need, man. And that was it. And I was like, what the – how do I – and, you know, we weren't rushed in the morning. There was nothing going on. There was no drama. We were taking it easy and just cruising, having a coffee. Get home the next day, all my stuff that I was going to take just laid out on the bed. They're just sitting there, fellas, where the bag was.

15:15Keyzie:And I'm like, what is going on in my head that that happened? Right. Might be a case of, might be, you know, early onset. It might be. Might be the Bellamy's. But do you guys, I mean, because I know, Keezy, you like to pack, like you probably already pack for Magic Round, I'm imagining. Mogi, I know you're a bit more. Do you want me to respond to that? A bit more haphazard. What do you guys like at packing?

15:39Mike Minogue:I've got to, I'm not going to lie. I have, have you heard of packing cells? Yes. Which are small bags. I use them to go to Europe. Jase, you simply must. Small bags within your bag. And you go, this one is for undies. Boom, boom, boom. Undies. This one's for T-shirts. Boom, boom, boom. And I have about six of those. Boom, into a bag. And I'm good to go. Right, okay. So I'm very onto it, Jay. So I would have taken maybe three pairs of undies, even though I was there for two days. Yeah, I always like an extra pair. Just in case. You never know. You might shit yourself.

16:04Keyzie:You do a midnight steamer and there's just crap everywhere.

16:09Mike Minogue:Splatter. That's not at all what I mean. I mean, like if you go for a swim or something and you've got your undies on and you might need another pair. Oh, yeah. Well, that was the other thing. Or you do poos everywhere.

16:18Keyzie:You know, my wife went for a swim and I was like, oh, did I bring any? And I couldn't wear my undies because they were the only undies I had. You had one pair of undies? Yes. And a fish pie. Well, we made the fish pie. But it was a debacle. I was effing and jeffing like you wouldn't believe. Yeah, I mean, there's something wrong with you. Yeah, there is. A hundred percent. You must be confused. But a similar thing happens to me last year at Magic Round, or was it the year before? My memory's not very good, I can't tell you. But didn't take my laptop, didn't take my wallet, didn't take my sunglasses.

16:49I was, it was an absolute debate. It's the same thing. And you're just left questioning yourself like you had nothing to do with it. Yeah. But it's your fault. Yeah. But you're sitting there going, well, how the hell have you, how do you have no wallet? How do you have no computer? It's like, well, I don't know. You're the idiot, not me.

17:04Mike Minogue:That's right. Because last year you got to Brisbane and all you had was a fish pie and a backbone T-shirt. That's right. The Hauraki Big Show. Weekdays from four on Radio Hauraki.

17:15Keyzie:The exponents there on the Radio Hauraki big show this Monday afternoon. The time is 4.49 Let's Talk TV. What's on the telly with Mike Minogue?

17:33Fellas, on what day was it? It was Saturday night there. I had the opportunity to get along and see Split Ends play at the Vector Arena, also known as Spakarena. Spakarena. I had never really been into Split Ends, to be honest. But yeah, it always feels like I was a little bit too young for them when they came out. And there was a period where people were listening to them all the time when I was a little bit older. But for some reason, I never really got into it. My next door neighbour loved them. But from my point of view, it just wasn't really my cup of tea. Sure. Anyway, went along to it. Absolute all-timer.

18:08And I walked away from there saying that they are by far and away the best band that New Zealand has ever produced. I'd like to hear some ideas around who would be better. Very wacky. They're like New Zealand's talking heads sort of thing. Yes. Set design was incredible. Absolutely packed out. The floor was all seated as well. They knew who the audience was, which was a bunch of grey-haired, silver fox legends like me. Yes. And a little bit older. And a lot older. But every single song is an absolute banger. Absolutely.

18:38Keyzie:Were you a fan of them when you were growing up? I'm like you, actually, Moggy. Not particularly. Yeah. Not particularly. But, you know, I certainly enjoyed some of their tunes. But I've heard actually from a number of people that it was amazing. Absolutely. The concert was amazing. Phenomenal. The costumes, the stage design, the chat between all of them. Just, yeah, unbelievable. One of those bands for me. I cannot believe how great they are.

19:04Mike Minogue:Where you go, oh, Split Ends, oh, yeah. And then they go, oh, you know the song, this. And you go, oh, yeah. And then you go, Icy Red, oh, yeah. Can I have a game of that with you now, Keezy? Okay. Shark Attack, History Never Repeats, Poor Boy, Give It A Whirl, Dirty Creature, One Step Ahead, What's the Matter With You, Message To My Girl, Stuff And Nonsense, My Mistake, Six Months In A Leaky Boat, I Got You, I See Red, I Hope I Never, Straight Old Line, Spellbound. It's just like... I Hope I Never is just a great tune. It was phenomenal. Everybody's seated to begin with, and by the end of it, everybody's standing.

19:40Too late to go and see them now, of course, but five buzzies out of a possible five buzzies. Wow, great stuff. Technically not a TV show, but yeah.

19:48Keyzie:Fellas, if you love your murder mysteries, I have got an absolute doozy for you. Have you heard of a series called Broken Wood? I have, and I watched it last night. Yeah. I've just remembered. If you love your intrigue, if you love a cup of tea on a Sunday night, If you love a whodunit with a very sort of, you know, multi-layered kind of plot going on, Broken Wood is the one for you. Very interesting that you describe it as a whodunit because I saw a review last night that described it as a why watch it. Oh, really? A why watch it. Really? That's clever. Yeah.

20:30Mike Minogue:Because that's the show you're on, eh, Jase? Oh!

20:34Keyzie:I'm not sure. I'd have to have a look at that.

20:35Mike Minogue:You're quite often on it.

20:37Keyzie:I'd have to have a look at that, Keezy. I've done so much stuff, it's hard to... What's your character's name? Isn't it Rainus?

20:43Mike Minogue:Oh, Hoity Rainus, that's right. He runs the pub.

20:47Keyzie:No, it's Riz. Riz, that's right. Riz the Republican. Hoity Riz, yeah. Yeah, Hoity Riz.

20:53Mike Minogue:I watched it last night. It was like an alien mystery, a bit of golf in there. I was on mute. Was he in it? No, he wasn't. I was keeping an eye out. I was like, oh, there he is. Weird looking bastard.

21:02Keyzie:Is that the latest series, is it?

21:04Mike Minogue:Apparently. I think it was on one. Yes. And I watched it. It was on mute because we were catching up with the in-laws and having a bit of a yarn. But I was keeping an eye out for Jason. There was aliens and people doing weird stuff, a guy playing golf.

21:15Keyzie:I will watch it. I've not seen it, so I'm going to watch it. When he says that he had the in-laws and he was just lying on the couch. Sleeping on the couch.

21:24Mike Minogue:I was lying in front of the fire on my back. And they were sort of all talking, and I was just like, yeah. I reckon, eh? Yeah, totally.

21:34Keyzie:Good times. Hey, here's the darkness.

22:06Keyzie:I was thinking actually Toledo's would be really good in sports clubs and stuff like that too. After the fellas and everyone had a bit of a dedouche on the rugby field or the soccer field or the hockey field. Just the fellas? Or the women. All the women, so no children? All of everyone that plays sport, all right? What about if I'm just watching and it's a really hot day? I'll get thirsty too. Yeah, well, that's true, Mogi. anyone that's in the club, be they child, male or female, whoever you are, you can have them. So you're saying that if I don't like sport, Toledo's not for me. No, I'm saying if you're in the sports club, you can fill your boots.

22:53Mike Minogue:But if you leave the club and go outside to watch the sport, leave that Toledo's behind as well. I think that's what he's saying. Am I right in saying that, Jase? That's a weird line to take. Anyway, all good. Especially from its sponsor. They'll be a bit gutted about that. Yeah. Oh, well. Coming up next, though, old hoity Jay's been in a whore of a mood lately because he's given up vaping and everything else that's good, apparently. So should we touch on that, Jase? We'll touch on that. That open wound, that raw nerve.

23:21Keyzie:Whatever, fellas. You don't care anymore, eh? I don't. Here's the strokes.

23:27Mike Minogue:The Hauraki Big Show with Jase, Mike and Keezy. Tune in weekdays at 4 on Radio Hauraki.

23:33Keyzie:The Offspring there on the Radio Hauraki big show this Monday evening. The time, 13 minutes past 5 o 'clock. And fellas, I'm not happy.

23:47Mike Minogue:Has something been bugging you? Yes. Sorry to hear that, man.

23:53Keyzie:Play it! It's been bugging me! No, man, I mean, I'm all G, really. Yeah, yeah. But, you know, I've been told that, well, I've made a deal that I have to give up the vape. You've been told.

24:08Mike Minogue:You've agreed to a bet. You said the vape was making you feel that you had sore lungs, you'd always have a headache and blah, blah, blah. You really want to kick the habit. You're not happy. So we made a bet that you'd kick it for the month of May. Yes.

24:20Keyzie:Subling along those lines.

24:22Mike Minogue:No, it's exactly that. And we either get$100 from Ogie or we have to give him$100.

24:26Keyzie:So no smoking, no drinking, no vape.

24:28Mike Minogue:Yeah. God, what's become of me? You're a shocking bastard, man. I am.

24:33Keyzie:And look, you know, to be honest with you, I've been in situations quite a lot throughout my life where I've given stuff up. I don't ever recall being in such a horror of a mood. Now, I mentioned earlier in the show how we went to the batch for a night and I packed the bag. I packed a T-shirt and left everything sitting on the bed. So not only am I in a whore of a mood, my brain is all over the place.

24:59Mike Minogue:Yeah. Honestly, I'm worried.

25:00Keyzie:It is like I'm scattered.

25:01Mike Minogue:Yeah. So day two of the batch, were you just there just wearing the T-shirt and nothing else Donald Duck style?

25:07Keyzie:Well, no, I was wearing what I was wearing, Keezy. I just had no change of clothing. Yeah, sorry, man. I was just joking around. Well, don't, okay, because it's not funny.

25:19Keyzie:And you know when you're in that sort of mood and you're just, you're on edge and people are like, you all G, man? Like when I say people, like your wife, you all good, darling? Yes, what do you ask? Why, you just seem a bit off. Well, no, I'm perfectly fine. I'm just watching television. and usually I can sort of go through those things but I have persistently over the last three days been in a whore of a mood. Also what's happening to me is I'm being plagued by nightmares, right? Really? Now, you know, I've always been plagued by nightmares but I've always had my durries. Living nightmares though, right?

26:03In your waking hours.

26:04Keyzie:And in my waking hours. But I've always got my ciggy. Like some homeless fella will get up in your face. Yeah, or something like that. Or you have to go to work for four hours a day. Yeah, exactly. And I can just have a ciggy or a vape, you know, or whatever. Just calm me down. I don't have that anymore. Wow. You're choosing not to, Jase. I've got no sympathy for you, man. Easy solved, man. Don't listen to him, man. I went to the batch, and I got anxiety because I didn't have any ciggies, and I didn't have a vape. So I said, what do I do? Or undies. I mean, what do I do? Or undies. Exactly. Exactly.

26:38Keyzie:What do I do with this panic, this anxiety, this rage that I'm feeling?

26:43Mike Minogue:So you're in a beautiful spot, your family back. Yes, it's beautiful. You could go fishing, you could go swimming. What's the point of him going fishing? The point of him going fishing is so he can smoke. It's not to catch fish. When's the last time he caught a fish? Thank you, Mogey. It's never happened. I don't think he's ever caught a fish. He's out there vaping. He doesn't even own a fishing rod. There's no bait on the hook if he does. He's just holding a stick.

27:04Keyzie:I think you're the only one that gets me, Mogey. Yeah, man. You know what I'm saying? No, don't. He's trying to win the bet. Not at all. Not at all. I would love for Jase to give up. And then my wife says things like, but you're doing so well. Oh, talking down to you like you're a goddamn idiot. It's like I'm effing and jeffing. But you're doing so well, darling. You are doing well, Jase. I'm really proud. Don't say that to me. Don't say that. You know what someone suggested to me yesterday? Go on. That I write a gratitude list. Oh, my God. I'm not joking. I nearly punched them. Who was it? I'm not going to tell you who it was.

27:39Keyzie:Right. But it's like, you know what you should do seriously, Jase, is start writing a gratitude journal. Is that one of your homeless mates? Possibly. And I was like, and I go, and then I'm okay for half an hour, and then I'm in a horror of a mood for about two hours. Or four. And I can't shake it. Well, it goes to show you, doesn't it, how bad these vapes are. If this is a reaction that you're having to, You've never had this reaction with cigarettes before. And here we are, Jase. You're halfway through the month almost. I'm looking at my watch like I can see it. Give or take, we're roughly halfway through the month, and you're still feeling like this.

28:18Or if anything, it's getting worse.

28:20Mike Minogue:It's getting worse. It's getting worse. Such a good point. Goes to show how bad the vapes are. By the way, we're a third of the way through the month. And what's the point of trying to give up, really? Thanks, Kiki. No, Moggy. So, you want something else to focus on.

28:32Keyzie:I need another addiction.

28:34Mike Minogue:Alright, well, people text through 3483, what other addictions should Hoity J replace vaping and drinking with?

28:39Keyzie:And it's got to be good. It's got to be, I was going to say dirty, but then that will invite a certain amount of addiction. Have you ever tried a cigar? Ooh, no, that would violate the bed as well. I did think about a pipe. Oh, that's all good. You know, like an old school. Like a glass pipe? No, you know, your pipe pipe with tobacco in it.

29:01Mike Minogue:The Hauraki Big Show. Weekdays from 4 on Radio Hauraki The Sons of Hauraki Gotta live this life Let's see who wants to ride with the street dogs Yeah That's us, hey, Felix Oh, we're the street dogs Yeah, man The street dog Why, you got a wolf? Sorry, do you think a dog and a wolf are the same thing? Come on, man, we've told you about this Come on, Chase, man They're completely different animals Street Dog is the brand of electric motorbike we're giving away. We've got two options there, fellas. If you've got a car license only and not a motorbike license, Street Dog 50 is for you. You're able to ride that just on a car license, which is great.

29:47Mike Minogue:But if you've got a motorbike license, you can get the Street Dog XR, which is a big step up.

29:52Keyzie:I tell you what, old Keezy had a hoon on one of the mogey. Bloody quiet hands. Oh, because it hasn't got a... Yeah, there's no... There's no throb. Like we used to get back in the day with the hairy scrotes. When we were in our former motorcycle club, the hairy scrotes.

30:09Mike Minogue:I'm glad you sort of dropped that little piece of info in there because I reckon that was about four or five years ago. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah. We talked about the hairy scrotes.

30:17Keyzie:But these electric bikes, they're amazing. And they're actually beautiful to look at. As soon as we jumped on this, I got in touch with them and asked if I could get involved with one. Yes. Because they are sick, mate. They are beautiful looking bikes. What did they say? Oh, nothing in the end, man. Because I Googled it and I was just talking to the screen, but the internet doesn't work like that, Keaton. You have to pick up the phone. Oh, right. Not only do you have to pick up the phone, you have to push those buttons there. The buttons or keyboard. But not just any buttons. No, the right ones in the right order.

30:51Mike Minogue:Thank you. Fellas, please. So if you would like to join our gang, the sons of Hauraki, and win a street dog electric motorbike, all you've got to do is listen out for that cue to call, call through and the good news is we've got one to give away for the North Island chapter and one to give away for the South Island chapter as well. How good. So let's go to the Lions, eh, Fearless? Okay.

31:08Keyzie:G'day, Neil, you mad bastard. How's life? Oh, I'm not bad, mate. Pretty good. Yeah, good. What about yourself? Yeah, not too bad, mate. What do you do for a crust, Neil?

31:17Mike Minogue:I'm a panel beater by trade. Oh, good on you. Just bog it all up, Neil? Yeah. Yeah, mate. Yeah, I know. I know how it's done, mate. Yeah.

31:28Keyzie:And tell me, Neil, have you ever owned a bike? Yeah, yeah, yeah, a few bikes. Bloody good. Have you ever prospected for a sick motorcycle gang like ours, man? Nah, mate, nah, but I've been looking for one. Yeah, get on you, mate. There you're talking, Neil, you backbone. Well, good news to you, my friend. You're in the Jaws down the line. Pugs will sort you out, all right? Oh, awesome, mate. Thanks very much. Thanks, Neil. Who's a backbone? Lovely fella. Yeah. G'day, you and your mad bastard. How's life?

31:55Mike Minogue:Yeah, not bad. How you got? Yeah, good, thanks.

31:58Keyzie:Ewan, what do you do for a crust?

32:00Mike Minogue:I'm a Sparky by trade. Ah, backbone. People like saying by trade, I notice. Yeah, yeah. Why don't you just say I'm a Sparky or I'm a panel beater? Yeah, totally. That's such a good point. That's what I'm just wondering. I'm a top radio DJ by trade.

32:13Keyzie:You're an electrician, yeah.

32:14Mike Minogue:Yeah, good on you, Ewan, man. See, that was actually a test. Mogi was sort of testing you there.

32:20Keyzie:Ewan, what about you? Who ever owned a bike in your life?

32:23Mike Minogue:Yeah, a couple of dirt bikes here and there.

32:25Keyzie:Oh, yeah, nice. I've got a ride, though. Yeah, nice. Good on you, mate. Well, these are beautiful machines. So you stay on the line as well, mate. We'll saw you out. And finally, is it Digby. G'day, Digby, you mad bastard. How's life?

32:37Mike Minogue:G'day, fellas. Curious. Oh, Digby there. What do you do for a cross Digby? Oh, I'm a teacher. By trade? Oh, your backbone. You're a teacher by trade, mate? Oh, that was a pretty little backbone. Yeah, so the thing about Keezy is he hates teachers. Oh, yeah.

32:53Keyzie:I expect that from Keezy. Yeah, he's a shocker, mate. Keezy, man. Come on, man. You were a nightmare student. You said back in the day, Keezy. 100 % wagged a lot.

33:02Mike Minogue:Hey, Digby, man, you ever thought about joining a gang? Yeah, I've been thinking about it. I thought it was the Sons of Achy Knees, though. Oh, yeah, Sons of Achy Knees. No, they're actually our mortal enemies, man. So if you see anyone in that gang, you've got to smack them over. Yeah, you've got to smack them over, all right? You're down for that, man. You've got to smack them over. Okay. Yeah, good on you, Digby. You hold the line, mate. You're in the drawer as well. Thank you. Good on you, mate. Okay. No nonsense. It sounded like prebs.

33:27Keyzie:It was almost like you could shut up now. Yeah, that's right. That's right. You know what I mean? Silly buggers. Yeah. This is one of the great prizes, let me say. You get your hands on one of these, you'll be a very, very happy individual. 100%.

33:37Mike Minogue:They are styled after the classic cafe racer style of motorcycle. Oh, yeah. That's what I thought when I saw them. Yeah. Why do they call them cafe racers again? Yeah. Good one, Keezy. They used to put them out of the front of cafes and it would have the signage on them, eh? 100%. Yeah. That's 100 % correct. Street Dog, big shout-out for providing the two bikes. Plenty of chances to get in the draw. Listen out for that cue to call. Call 0800-HORAKI. Yeah, good stuff, man.

34:02Keyzie:Here's Radiohead.

34:03Mike Minogue:Thanks, man. The Horaki Big Show with Jase, Mike, and Keezy. Tune in weekdays at 4 on Radio Horaki.

34:12Keyzie:Yeah, welcome back, you massive backbones. Hope your Monday's going off and you got through your Monday okay. You're listening to The Big Show brought to you by Toledo's.

34:22Mike Minogue:That's right, Toledo's natural electrolyte drinks. You can find them across the country or online at toledos.co.nz.

34:32Mike Minogue:Toledo's. What's for dinner tonight, Jase? Oh, great question. Thank you. Haven't I talked about that? No, you said you were going to have something, but you didn't say what it was. Can we ask a question without you absolutely blowing up?

34:43Keyzie:Oh, you can ask.

34:46Mike Minogue:What are you eating?

34:46Keyzie:I just bought stuffed pasta, which I'm not even really into. Foul. With mushrooms and, you know, mushroom stuffed pasta. I'll make a creamy mushroom sauce with that. Ravioli? Yes, a bit of pesto. Fumin. Some parmesan maybe, and I'll put some fresh chilli in there and garlic, of course. So spicy mushroom pasta. Yeah. Any like chilli or anything? Yeah, that's what I mean. I'll put some... Fumin. Absolutely. Jeez. Boy, oh boy. Jase, is that a new shirt, man? Oh, poor Jase.

35:26Mike Minogue:He's almost two weeks into his kicking the vape in the ciggies, and you're doing well, man. You're doing really well. Yeah, whatever, fellas.

35:33Keyzie:What are you guys having for tea? What are you having, Keezy? You're just downed a massive bag of chips.

35:39Mike Minogue:Yeah, that was delicious. I'm not sure we've got a My Food Box, Hello Box coming. Yeah, hello box, that's what it is. Yeah, it's like, yeah.

35:48Keyzie:My food hello box. That's the one. We had curry last night, and so hopefully there's a little bit of leftovers there, fielas when I get home. It's probably all gone, though, knowing my luck. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, totally. Nah. Yeah. Actually, speaking of that, I had a real clean out of the fridge today. Oh, go on. Bloody leftovers everywhere. Yeah, God. Are you eating this, said I? Are you eating this? No, probably not. Buff it.

36:11Mike Minogue:Yeah, nice. Actually, I had a bad experience with my food Hello Box the other day. Yeah. It was shit. It was a mushroom ravioli with chili in it. It was disgusting. A little bit of extra garlic in there. Yeah, and all sorts of – It was disgusting. It was the worst meal. Who thinks of that?

36:33Keyzie:Well, you know, a bad carpenter blames his tools.

36:39Mike Minogue:What? It doesn't make any sense. Do you like Nirvana, Jase? Not really. The Hauraki Big Show with Jase, Mike and Keezy. Tune in weekdays at four on Radio Hauraki.

36:53Keyzie:She had there on the Radio Hauraki Big Show this Monday evening. The time is 6.12. Now, Keezy's been looking forward to this last weekend for quite a few months. He's been chatting about it to the fellows off here. It was a filthy, dirty boys weekend. And it sounded like it lived up to expectations, Keezy.

37:12Mike Minogue:Well, it was filthy, but not in the way you guys are insinuating. It was a golf tournament trip down south there to the beautiful town of Geraldine. Three-day golf tournament, three games of golf was bloody good, and you're going down there with a group of young fellas, same age as me really, middle-aged fellas, 30, mid-30s, taking on all the older boys, the generation up, and there's a big competition going on. It's bloody great. But the thing I notice is the difference between the way that dudes book, trips like this and the way that, for example, my wife and her friends book a trip. She recently went down to Christchurch and then they booked a house in Hanma Springs which is a lovely little resort town thing.

37:53Mike Minogue:Went up there and took cheese boards and charcuterie and they took all this stuff to have all this fun with and they just had this lovely time and it just sounded very relaxing and very nice. They were at the hot pools and blah blah blah blah. We go down to Geraldine, we leave the booking to the last minute, get a house with three bedrooms with eight beds in them, one of which was a four-bunk room with four dudes in there in their mid-30s, all either steamed or hungover. Yeah. Ripping ass. Ripping ass and snoring. All of them snoring. This young fellow called Reece, who I'd never met before, was like, how's last night?

38:31Mike Minogue:He was like, I don't think I got a single second of sleep because he was in the bunk room with the fellas. I was in a single bed in a very, very old house in Geraldine. I was in a single bed that had just a mattress protector on it, couldn't find sheets anywhere, had just a single duvet without a cover on it, just the inner. I had a flat pillow that was about an inch thick. That was definitely the kind of pillow you put on top of your actual sleeping pillow for decoration. Yes. I had to fold that like three times to make it anywhere near a regular pillow. And I was so cold. I woke up in the middle of the night and I was freezing because all I had was a duvet inner and it was like zero degrees down there.

39:09Mike Minogue:I had to get this feathery decorative throw rug thing, which is probably the size of a towel. I got that off the end of the bed of the dude who was, I didn't know who it was, by the way, because he came in later than I did and he was steamed and he was snoring. Couldn't see who it was. But I stole this throw rug off his bed and put it on me. Next morning, there's one toilet, one shower, eight hungover dudes running through there. It was a disgrace.

39:33Keyzie:Yeah, I can imagine.

39:34Mike Minogue:It was a disgrace. And guess what? No soap, no body wash, no shampoo. The toilet hadn't been cleaned by the previous occupants of the property. Yeah. I went to use some – I was so desperate to, like, wash myself in the shower. I went to use the bath soap there. Sorry, the hand soap by the basin. Pushed the thing. Water came out. I didn't wash my hands probably for, like, three days. You thought it was water. No, it was water. I didn't wash my hands probably for three days because the golf club also didn't have any soap in the dispensers. I seriously didn't wash my hands or wash anything with soap for three days.

40:08Mike Minogue:It was a disgrace. But how good was it? It was great. I loved it. Yeah, yeah. Like I said, it was awesome. But you're just like, why can't we be better? Why do we have to? We're all in our mid-30s. It's interesting what you say there about the wives there, and you're exactly right. It would have been all the food came out, it would have been on chopping boards,

40:29little ramekins of olives, et cetera, et cetera. at your set up with those mongrels. And this is crazy because you're old enough to know better. 100%. It's an absolute disgrace. But somebody would have, if you were lucky, grabbed a bag of chips, ripped them open and dropped them on a table, and that would have been the extent of the catering for the weekend in that house. That literally happened once.

40:49Mike Minogue:I opened the fridge and put a photo on my Instagram story. There was literally one beer that I'd put in there when I was steamed the night before, and the rest of it was empty. Oh, and a meat pack I won. I won some sausages. and then it's just two of the fellas got home very very late wanted to have a nightcap there was nothing in the house they had a cup of tea without any milk and that was their nightcap after being at the pub it was just a disgrace yeah it is a disgrace

41:15Keyzie:what happened because you were saying on the second night you woke up in the bed with that what was his name? oh the dude I banged yeah yeah

41:26Mike Minogue:The Hauraki Big Show with Jase, Mike and Keezy tune in Weekdays at 4 on Radio Hauraki

41:31Keyzie:Phil to there on the Radio Hauraki Big Show this Monday evening The time being 6.25 Fellas I've been Through the ringer a little bit haven't I With my vehicles etc etc I've gone from the absolute highs Of having two of the most popular cars In the country your Nissan Tita And your Toyota Aqua there Number one, number two every single year For most desirable vehicles in the country The most owned Stolen which means the most desirable, most loved, beloved. Most sought after. Thank you. And also I've had my push bike there. Beautiful, beautiful rally. Healing. Healing, thank you. Ten speed. And had a flat tyre now for going on three months.

42:16I don't know what's wrong with it. It's unfixable. Unfixable. I don't know what to do about it. Anyway, it comes a time in a man's life when he's got to sack up, They call it keys. Have you heard about that, man?

42:28Mike Minogue:Nah. Sacking up. Nah. And what you've got to do there is you've got to get yourself a new car. And so I've done it. I'm not used to spending a lot of money on cars, but I thought, hey, why not treat myself? Why not treat myself? Splash out. I've put an order in. It's on back order. And I'm just waiting for it to get into Auckland. And then that'll be me, fellas. Fancy. Wow, that's great. Fancy pants. Very exciting. Very fancy. I'm a little bit worried about getting mocked about it because it is a bit fancy, isn't it? Ordering. Ordering a car. Yeah, yeah.

43:03Keyzie:Well, you've got your Wellington Paranormal money. Oh, don't forget about my talkback money. Oh, and your talkback money. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's coming out my ears.

43:13Mike Minogue:Yeah, because you obviously had the Toyota Aqua, which kind of got stolen. By the Auckland Council, and then they sold it. That's right. And kept all the money. That's right. You got the Tita which blew up and then you went to get the engine replaced in it and then the mechanic burned down.

43:28Keyzie:Which is all true.

43:30Mike Minogue:100 % true. So to go from that to buying a brand new car on back order. Well, I don't know about a brand new car. It's not tech. I mean, brand new to me, sure. Yes. Hang on, you said it's on back order. It is on back order. Yes. The engine is. The engine's on back order. So I've ordered. It's from Dunedin. So that's pretty. Flash, man. How are you talking? Yeah, yeah. So the engine's on back order. Yes. And the engine's in Dunedin? The engine's in Dunedin. That's right. And your car. Yes. So you bought a car without an engine. No, the car is my Tita. So I'm getting a new engine. It's only got 45 ,000 Ks on it.

44:10And I'm putting it into my old Tita, which I love. So I've got the best of both worlds. I've got my old Tita, the body, which I absolutely love. Good body. They're an elegant car. They're a beautiful car, and I've got a brand new engine in it.

44:26Mike Minogue:That's so great. Thanks, man. To be honest, I thought you had bought a new car, and I was like, oh, God, what's Mogi bought? I was freaking out of it there. But a new engine for the Tita, that's great. Two and a half grand. Wow. Two and a half grand. Certainly an amount of money, isn't it? Isn't it an amount of money? Yeah. And it's on back order? Back order, yeah, yeah. So hopefully we have that in about the next six to eight months. Does that include installation? Includes installation, includes all your oils and your lubricants as well. Oh yeah. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, man. So anyway, I just wanted to say that as soon as it's up here and she's all ready and rolling and all that, I want to break it in and I thought we could take it away on a sort of a boys weekend.

45:03Just the four fellas packed into the teeter, what do you say? Your teeter with a second hand engine in it.

45:09Mike Minogue:Yeah, sure. Yeah, sounds good to me. Yeah, great. Oh, congratulations, mate. Thanks, man. Where should we go?

45:15Keyzie:Where was that? Where were you? Geraldine?

45:17Mike Minogue:Yeah, well, that's way down south. Why don't we go to Jase's Batch?

45:20Keyzie:How far is that? I don't know that the teeter's got it in it, to be honest. It's an hour away. Yeah. No, it's about an hour and a half. Hour three quarters.

45:29Mike Minogue:It's an hour three quarters.

45:30Keyzie:Yeah. Not in the teeter, fellas.

45:32Mike Minogue:More like two hours three quarters. The Hauraki Big Show. Weekdays from four on Radio Hauraki.

45:39Keyzie:James Addiction there on the Radio Hauraki Big Show. This Monday evening, the time is 6.37. Let's give out some advice.

45:52Mike Minogue:MeetPettyNip69 at gmail.com. Get in touch with the fellas. With the fellas!

46:03Mike Minogue:MeetPettyNip69 at gmail.com. It is a real email address. And if you ever need advice on anything, you get in touch. And if you read it on the show, you get a prize. And it's anonymous too. What is the prize? Which is lovely. The prize. It changes. Ah. You know, there's backbone teas. There's a million dollars. Million dollars. You're still doing that? Yeah.

46:20Keyzie:Sweet as.

46:21Mike Minogue:One random one. It's just like a lucky dip, really. One random one's a million dollars. There's all sorts of stuff. Pugs was listing it off earlier and I couldn't keep up. Yeah, I know. Yeah, it was crazy. It was like$1 million,$900 ,000,$2 million. Yes. Fellas, this email comes in from Anonymous. Actually, it says here Anonymous Mum of Anonymous. Oh. G'day there, feels. My son's birthday is coming up And we have a tradition of decorating a themed birthday cake Related to what he's currently into And this year I'm thinking of surprising him with a cake themed on the big show Nice He does listen to your show 24-7, even on the toilet Couldn't be prouder He's a full-blown quote-dropping podcast, replaying superfan So I want to nail the vibe If you had to sum up the essence of the show in cake form What needs to be on it?

47:06Mike Minogue:Give me your must-have catchphrases and or images Help me create a cake that people look at and say Yeah, that's a Big Show cake. Cheers. I think just one massive honker. Yes. Oh, but then it would just be like a sort of ogey cake.

47:20Keyzie:So what, they're wanting the essence. Or three honkers bumper to bumper. They want the essence of the Big Show.

47:27Mike Minogue:I don't know the way you keep saying essence, but yes, they want to capture the essence. To put into the cake. What about, I don't know if everyone out there listening has seen the imagery from the Horeki Big Show. What about just Jase wearing a cheese cutter with his hand reaching out? That's good. That's iconic. Yeah, I don't know. I don't love that photo of Jase, to be honest.

47:50Mike Minogue:I think because they just want to capture the essence of the big show as opposed to just put our likenesses on a cake, right? Right. So you need backbone in there. Oh, backbone.

47:58Keyzie:Yeah, bit of backbone. Bit of douche.

48:03Mike Minogue:Douche, douche. Old mogie. Some cigarette. What if he just made a cake and then just got some cigarette? I can't have cigarettes anymore. Jase doesn't smoke. I don't smoke. Yeah, yeah, I don't know why. You're the only smoker left out of all of us. Yeah, totally, totally. I and Pugs are. I don't smoke. Pugs does, but I don't. With his little Vietnamese one. Pugs smokes like a train every day, but I don't. So, okay, so you don't want to sprinkle tobacco on a cake? It seems like it'll be disingenuous, actually, to represent ourselves in that manner. Yes, it will. Okay, well, what about stuff that does represent us?

48:32Mike Minogue:So, Mogi, for you, maybe a little fella there doing a bit of work on a laptop. Yes, there we go. What are we talking about? And a little model teeter, like a little Hot Wheels version of a teeter. They make a lot of those. They go very well. You could be doing a steamer on the park. Oh, there we go. With three seats. Three seats for steamers. No, they're three seats. So you're on a seat. Mogi's on a seat doing a little bit of work. Oh, nice. Yeah, I like it. I'm on a toilet. Doing a steamer. Doing a steamer. Yeah. Yeah. And Jase, you're on like a high chair. He's fallen in. He's fallen. He's trying to get out of the toilet.

49:06Mike Minogue:He's stuck in the toilet. Yeah.

49:08Keyzie:And my legs are just poking up the front. That's right, yeah. Yeah, I like it, I like it. With backbone. Written on the front there. Yeah. Yeah, yeah. Or you could just do right Big Show on it. Yay.

49:18Mike Minogue:Actually, that's a good idea. Yeah, Big Show. The Hauraki Big Show with Jase, Mike and Keezy. Tune in weekdays at four on Radio Hauraki.

49:34Keyzie:Well, there you go, you mad bastards. That's the big show done and dusted for you Monday night. What's the podcast outro clip today, Keezy?

49:43Mike Minogue:Yeah. Yeah, man. Hey, fellas. The podcast clip today is entitled Podcast. So I've got no idea what it's about. Oh, nice. But it comes out at 7.30 tonight.

49:53Keyzie:So this podcast started, my daughter in the back, and this 19-year-old girl started off with, yeah, I think, oh, no, she was about 20 by then, she said. I think I was about 18 or 19 when I first got into a play. And there was a pause and my daughter in the back was like, did she just say a play?

50:17Mike Minogue:Yeah, shocker. That was a shocker. It was a shocker of a choice from my wife there. That was a podcast on a family trip, wasn't it? Yes, it was. It was actually.

50:26Keyzie:Mogi, what are your plans for the night, mate? A little bit of work, man. I might have a bath tonight. Don't know. Yeah, maybe a bath. Maybe watch a bit more telly. I've been watching this show called Widow's Bay on Apple TV, but it's released weekly. Right, yes. And I'm filthy about that. So there's only three episodes out, so I'm just going to leave it until the whole series is out.

50:44Mike Minogue:So it's because you're filthy about that is why you're having a bath. I'm going to get in a bath. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, I'm going to read a book.

50:49Keyzie:You're going to do that, are you?

50:51Mike Minogue:What are you up to, Keezy? I'm going to go home and unpack my bag from Geraldine from the golf tournament I was just at. Yeah, get all the filth out. 100 % get all that filth out of my bag because it's still sitting in my car. It's just golf gear and our knees and socks. It's just disgusting. Yeah, it would be. I'm just going to grab all of it. You were saying that you were just going to take it out and just throw it in your wife's lap. Well, no, to be fair, I do most of the laundry in our house, Moggy. Why is that? Because I'm home. Why are you saying you can't trust a woman to do it? It's too late in the show to be starting this time because I'm home more often than she is because she has a regular job.

51:31Mike Minogue:You're a shocker. But I'm going to go home, unpack my bag, dump a load in the old washing machine there, get it done, and probably go to bed very early, Jase. What are you going to do tonight, man?

51:42Keyzie:Well, I've been, yeah, that. I'm going to be doing that. But I've been shit-stirring my daughter, but she's just not biting. You know when you stir people up and they just won't take the bait? 100%. Is that a new shirt, man? Yeah, it totally is. Thank you for noticing. And just chill out. Cook some dinner. Oh, yes. Mushroom risotto. No, mushroom. Mushroom pasta. Ravioli. Come on, man. Come on, Keezy. Oh, sorry. I said the wrong type of pasta. That's a disgrace. Hey, but do check out the Instagram. Do check out the podcast. And until tomorrow, see you later.