FULL SHOW: Option 1A

17:56Yeah! Yes. Woo! Woo! For the brief amount of time that my mother was staying with us in there, She was over from the Hawke's Bay. We watched the rest of the Alan Partridge series, which is on Neon, and it's about him talking about trying to sort out his mental health and what it is that people are going through with their mental health. Alan Partridge, of course, the comedian played by Steve Coogan since the mid-'90s, which has somehow retained its high-level... It's just a great, great character, and it's remained funny all the way throughout from the 90s. They've probably done six or seven series since the 90s.

18:37The character is like a TV host, radio host, sort of a fella there. My mother knew nothing about it. I said nothing to her. I just put it on, and she was dying laughing. Great. She knew nothing about it. I'd never seen it before in her life. Each episode is quite different as he tackles sort of different issues with mental health, some of them funnier than others. One of them wasn't funny at all to me, but I stuck with it, and there's some huge laughs, and I highly recommend it. It's on neon, and it's Alan Partridge, something or other.

19:05Mike Minogue:The good thing about British characters like that, like if that character was in the US, there would have been nine seasons, 24 episodes a season. Yeah. But because you just get little six-episode hits every few years. Which is what this is. Yeah, and Steve Kagan, who's the genius, puts so much effort and more time into these little things. You just get hits of high-quality content, sparingly, and it never gets old. That's right. It's so great. I highly recommend four buzies out of a possible five. Fills. Last night I watched I Survived. Stop watching that show. Oh, it's nearly finished. And it was, oh, no, it's 24-7, man.

19:47Mike Minogue:Ah. It's a non-stop channel, right? It's a non-stop channel, yeah. I thought that one with Old Mate, the Possum Hunter in it. No. That's Alone. Yeah. Another reality show. Naked and Alone. This was a doozy. What was the scenario? A farmer, and he was on his farm, and it was out in the middle of nowhere in America, and he farmed by himself. Farms are normally in the city. True. Combine harvester. Oh, here we go. Yeah, let's just say he fell out. Carnage. Carnage. Did he survive? He wakes, he comes to. Oh, great. And he goes, oh, what the hell happened there? What's going on? What's going on? Tries to get up.

20:34Oh. Tries to get up and he's got no arms. He's got no arms. Not one arm. He's got both of his arms have gone.

20:49Mike Minogue:Because usually he'd have two. He'd usually have two. there might be a scenario where you could lose one and you prop yourself up. But he said, I went to prop myself up on this arm and I realised I didn't have an arm. So I then went to prop myself up on the other arm and realised I didn't have an arm on that side either. And guess what? What? He survived. Must have been bleeding a bit. Yeah, bloody oh. He lost a lot of blood, Nagy. That's amazing. That was in the middle of nowhere. How's he survived that? Well, he eventually gets found by another farmer from Milesway who just happened perchance to go past a field and go, hang on, there's something not right here.

21:30So he could just see a geyser of blood. Yeah, like a pool of blood. So he went and called the emergency services and stuff and he survived. But he had to be like that for quite some time. Armless. Armless, and he still is to this day. but I don't know how he survived because he would have lost a crap load of blood. No, I don't know either. That sort of sounds a little bit fishy to me. He made a conscious effort to slow every single part of... Yeah, he was going to do the hands thing, but he went, oh, hang on, I've got no arms. Did they find his arms? Yes, but they couldn't be reattached. Crows had eaten them, Keezy.

22:09Crows had been at them. He wasn't a piece of Lego, Keezy. Yeah, it doesn't work. You can't just stick him back on like that. You can't just stick him back on like that.

22:17Mike Minogue:I just asked if they found his arms. I'm not saying that he's Lego. Yeah, what did he do with his arms? Amongst the machinery. Yeah, right, his arms were there. How did he fall out of the combine harvester? Oh, there was something, there was... He didn't have any arms, Mogi, were you not listening? Oh, yeah, did he not have them to begin with? He stood up and realised, no, something went wrong with the machine and he was just, he didn't turn it off and got in an awkward position and fell into it sort of thing. Oh, God. Yeah. God. God. It's full on, man. And that was on Samsung TV. Yeah, Samsung TV.

22:48I'll give it five buzzies. Five buzzies out of five. Cool.

22:50Mike Minogue:And the rating system's ruined. Coming up after five, another chance to get yourself in the draw for magic round. Listen out and get ready to call 0800-HAURAKI. Plus, fellas, I have hit the big time and I'm going to need some serious career advice from you guys. Good stuff, mate. The HAURAKI Big Show with Jace, Mike and Keezy. Tune in. Weekdays at 4 on Radio Hauraki. You're welcome back, you massive backbones. Hope you're surviving your Wednesday afternoon. You are listening to The Big Show, brought to you by Toledo's. Rehydrate the right way with Toledo's real ingredients and natural colours.

23:29Mike Minogue:Toledo's. Toledo. Oh, Moggy. God, your rhythm is... But I love it. I just can't wait to say it. Right, so that was you, you just couldn't hold it in. Yeah, I couldn't hold it anymore. But everyone wanted you to go a distance. Well, that's not the only place you're premature. Jase. Where else? That is hilarious, brother. Oh, the bedroom. Just heard a bit of stuff. Really? Yeah, I mean, I won't get into it here, obviously, on public radio, Moogie. I appreciate it. Because that would be really embarrassing for Moogie, you know. If everybody knew that I was a bit of a, what do you call that? a hair trigger.

24:12Yeah.

24:13Mike Minogue:Hey, just on Toledo's fellas, who'll be stoked that we're chatting about this. Can I just say about Toledo's Kesey before you go, it's New Zealand made. Totally, man. Are you going to go with New Zealand made or are you going to go with these American bastards? Yeah. New Zealand made all the way, mate. New Zealand made, brother. All day. Not only is it New Zealand made. Real ingredients, natural colours. Exactly We're talking good salt of the earth New Zealand electrolyte beverages Well that's what Jason and I were just saying What? Toledos.co.nz If you'd like to order yourself a case Otherwise I've rolled them out And all the fresh choices Make it two cases Keezy Sure man I'm not ordering I'm not putting an order in right now Could you put one in for me?

24:56No that's not Just while you're ordering Because as you say You know if you're ordering a case Might as well all get in on it Yeah Actually can I have a pallet Keezy? I'll get you on the next one Yeah yeah I mean, you guys can help yourself to my pallet. Come around to the old apartment there.

25:10Mike Minogue:Right, so I'm ordering a pallet of Toledo's. Yes, please. Okay, I was just, okay. Toledo's.co.nz. Yeah, fresh choices across the entire country. Various new wheels and pack and saves as well. They're getting out there, fellas. Fresh choices? Any there? Yeah, they got them at the fresh choices? Yeah, nationwide. Yeah, good. Yeah, yeah, good stuff, Keezy. Good stuff. Thanks, fellas. Hey, speaking of Keezy, he has a massive announcement next. Yeah, it's huge, fellas. Thank you. So stay tuned for that in the meantime. It's nothing to do with being pregnant or anything like that, Mogi. Thank you, boss.

25:42Mike Minogue:The Hauraki Big Show with Jace, Mike and Kesey. Tune in weekdays at four on Radio Hauraki. Gorillaz there on the Radio Hauraki Big Show this Wednesday evening. The time is 14 minutes past five o 'clock. Fellas, listen, I've got some huge news. Look, it's not breaking news. OK. Don't use a breaking news sting then. No, I'm not going to. That's why I said that. but it is huge news in terms of Keezy, in terms of the show and to be honest my career and where it goes from here. I don't know how to say this but I have been approached by Women's Day. To do what? Deliver them? No, not to deliver them like a paper route.

26:31Mike Minogue:But I've been approached by Women's Day, which is one of New Zealand's premier magazines. They want to do an article on Old Keezy. And I guess it was... Is that one of those weight loss articles? No, although I can recommend when I see them, if I say yes, documenting your weight gain journey because that could be quite interesting. Yeah, yeah, totally. My weight loss journey with Keezy. The weight gain journey with Woody J. But anyway, they've approached me and they've said, hey, we're interested in doing a story on you because... Can I just clarify here, Keezy? No, that is great news, mate. Cheers.

27:10Does it involve your wife and your little-y? Yes, that makes sense.

27:14Mike Minogue:When I don't have a little-y... Well, you know, it's on the way. No, no, no, it's not doing an announcement. Little old Keezy. I don't have a little old Keezy. There's nothing happening. Nothing happening down there. You're dead down there. No, that's not what I'm saying. It's not an article about how there's nothing happening downstairs. That would have been a good article. Yeah, it would. That would be a great article. Yeah, yeah. That's a scoop. Because there's nothing to be ashamed of. No, 100%. It's happened to me. 100%. Yeah, yeah. And that's probably, if there was an article on how there's nothing going on downstairs, I'd probably be like, you know, oh, even old Mogey, you know, he's got nothing.

27:43Mike Minogue:Yeah. And my hair trigger. And his hair trigger as well. And his hair hat. But no, that's not. There's a lot going on for old Mogey. There's a lot going on for old Mogey. But no, I guess the question is, and I was kind of hoping you guys could help with it, is like, what kind of angle, right? Right. Because I guess they want to document. Have you got your missus in there as well? Yeah, they wanted family life. Yeah, yeah, family life. Can I ask, because obviously there's going to be a photo shoot, do you have boat shoes? I don't have boat shoes. Right, okay, because you'll need some boat shoes if you're doing a, was it, Woman's Day?

28:14Where's my floaters? Oh, you've got your floaters, but no, they're a bit filthy at the moment. At home with Kesey and his massive hooves. Yes.

28:22Mike Minogue:Yeah, that's an angle that women would want to read, right, about me at home with big shoes? The headline can be like, oh, big shoes to fill. Oh, nice. Yeah, I like it, Keezy. Keezy's journey. I like it. I like it. Top DJ. I don't know. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Because I was kind of thinking maybe about more interesting stuff, you know, about, I don't know, you know, being involved with an iconic station like Hauraki and, you know. What about Keezy, my nips and me? About your meat patty nips? Because people love those. Yeah, I know they love them, but I was kind of hoping we'd stare away from that sort of thing just to be more about like, oh, here's my journey from being a young fellow.

29:03Well, I think Mania's already done that. And that article sank without a trace. Yeah, yeah, he did.

29:08Mike Minogue:How I Found Love on the Bus. He went... Mania Stewart story. Yeah, straight with it, didn't he? He did. He went very straight with it. Yeah, look, I agree with Mo. You've got three options here. Great. Option 1A. 1A, the baby route. I don't have a baby, though. Excited about, you know, blah, blah, blah. I have option B, meet Paddy Naps, or option 3C, my weight loss journey. But that's going to be further down the track. Yeah, it's going to be down the track because you haven't started it yet, obviously. Yeah, yeah, so I guess one of those three. Is that what you were sort of thinking? Yeah, to be honest, I was thinking something different, but I'll go to them with that.

29:56Yeah, are you the one that has come up with the idea?

29:58Mike Minogue:No, but I just wouldn't mind providing them with a few options. Oh, right, okay. Because I was going to do something along the lines of like, oh, you know, I'm not just a media guy. Like, oh, I've got a cool truck.

30:09That my dad did for me. No, that's, yeah. And I can't fit in.

30:15Mike Minogue:But yeah, I guess I'll go baby announcement. Yeah, yeah, that's good, man. Congratulations, Keezy. That's big news, mate. That is great. Big news. Thanks, man. Thanks. I'm anticipating a big future. Oh, yeah? For me. It worked for him a night, didn't it? He's on breakfast with old... What's his name? I think that's his name. The Hauraki Big Show. Weekdays from four on Radio Hauraki. Yes, indeed. Radiohead there on the Radio Hauraki Big Show this Wednesday afternoon. The time, 5.26. Fellas, Daylight Savings ended on Saturday night. I know, man. It's crazy. We wound back the clock. I can't believe we haven't spoken about it this week because normally that is prime radio chat.

30:56One of the things people complain about, obviously, is that things are getting darker. It's a sign that summer is over, that we're moving into the dark, cold days of winter. But I actually love it because I'm winding back the clock. Every time you wind back the clock and you wake up Sunday and you're like, Jesus, I feel amazing. Yes. And you don't know why, and you're like, that's right, daylight savings, wound back the clock. I feel like I'm looking 10 years younger. I feel like I've got a bit of lead in the old pencil again. My hair triggers back, Keezy. You know what I'm saying? Yeah. Well, not really.

31:27Mike Minogue:I mean, you're only wanting it back one hour. I feel like a whole new man, Moggy. You know what I'm saying? I'm a whole new man, yeah. I feel invigorated. It was quite cute last night, actually, because when we went after the show to walk to the car park, old Keezy was a bit scared. I mean, I have to hold his hand, you know, across the road anyway. But it was dark outside. We were both, weren't we, Keezy? We were both like, whoa, what's going on here? That's right, yeah. Actually, sometimes I'll put Jase on my shoulders and walk him across the road. He likes that. Yeah, but now that he's put on a few pounds, I can't really do it anymore.

32:06But, yeah, no, I mean, it's funny how people's perception of it is all over the place. You know, people get very negative. Oh, it's dark. Oh, you know, we're heading into winter. But I feel younger every year. Every time.

32:18Mike Minogue:But you're only winding the clock back a little bit. Yeah, we wind the clock back. I know. I've wound the clock back. I feel amazing. Right, okay. So the act of winding the clock back a wee bit has made you feel a lot younger and... And invigorated. Yeah, right. I feel like I've got my youth back. I'm not joking when I say I feel like I'm 29 again. Right, so you've gone from 39 to 29. Yeah. Far out. I'd say that's probably accurate. Funnily enough, I went into a 7-Eleven today, and a guy, he asked me my age because I was trying to get some vape. Oh, yeah, you got an ID. You got an ID, and I was like, are you joking, man?

33:02And I think that's purely because I look 10 years younger. Yeah, absolutely it is. Like, you came in on Tuesday, Keesie. I could have sworn you'd lost 20, 30 pounds.

33:14Mike Minogue:The Hauraki Big Show, weekdays from 4 on Radio Hauraki. Soundgarden there on the Radio Hodaki Big Show this moody Wednesday night. The time, 5.38. Oh, we're doing this, are we? What's on the news? With me, Keezy. Fellas, interesting stuff. Ogie's just shown me a drawing of a penis just as I'm about to read the news. That's done nothing but derail the segment. Well, it doesn't take much. Fellas, there is an unstoppable mushroom tearing through. Oh, Casey. But mushrooms unstoppable. This isn't an article about my downstairs. Moggy, this is serious business. There is a real unstoppable mushroom tearing through North American forests.

34:12Mike Minogue:and fungi enthusiasts are going into damage control mode. Oh. Okay. So this fungus, it's called the golden oyster mushroom. Sounds delicious. Yeah, I don't know if it is delicious. Maybe it is. But basically it's rapidly spreading across North America through forests and that, and it kind of pushes out and gets rid of all the other fungi. Yeah, good. And so the scientists are really worried about fungi diversity. Right. Yeah, you know, it's because it's replacing all these different, and it sort of takes over, and it's rapidly spreading across forests. I don't know, Mogi, if you've had an oyster mushroom.

34:49They're very, really nice. They have a really sort of silky kind of texture to them, and they're actually quite meaty to eat. You would not be blamed if you thought you were actually eating meat because it's so meaty. And just on your point there, Keezy, 100%, and also very mushroomy, Jase. Yeah, very mushroomy taste. Good in a stir-fry? Well, a lot of mushrooms, Keezy, not Keezy's mushroom, because we've been down that path, they don't taste very mushroomy at all. No. And over time, they've become less mushroomy. Yes. And that's not good.

35:27Mike Minogue:Well, what else isn't good? Another thing that's not good is the lack of mushroom diversity that we're facing. Fellas, we're facing a mushroom epidemic here. Well, my attitude toward mushrooms has always been the strongest survives, Kesey, and you don't want to get involved with nature. Now, if nature decides that these are the number one mushrooms, then so be it. All the other mushrooms are just going to have to stick up for themselves. I'm not getting involved in mushroom politics. And I'll be honest with you, I'm over the button mushroom. Oh, I hate the button mushroom. Who wants a button mushroom?

35:59I sure as hell don't. I don't think they're that bad.

36:02Mike Minogue:I mean, certain people out there don't mind them, I've found. But yeah, I'm just saying it's not here in New Zealand yet, the golden oyster mushroom, but just keep your wits about you. When did this happen? This was a week ago, the article. But it's a current event that is happening now. It's another pressing matter that we need to have on our minds at this particular moment. Amongst all the other stuff going on, we've just also got to keep an eye out for the golden oyster mushroom because it's coming for us.

36:34Mike Minogue:and that's what's um that's what's on the news with old Keezy this is on the news with Keezy there so uh sort of feels like we should have a big poll what? about mushrooms? good idea we could do that yeah what? instead of about mushroom but I was thinking we should get have a big poll about this segment no not about the segment totally we should I thought you meant like golden oyster mushrooms yes or no sort of thing What's wrong with the segment? Here's Guns N' Roses. The Hauraki Big Show with Jace, Mike and Kesey. Tune in weekdays at four on Radio Hauraki. Welcome back. The Big Show. Magic round three big.

37:17Let's put another mad bastard on the bed. Bloody oats, and I can tell you the phone lines are still going crazy, fellas. People are deadly keen to meet the fellas over in Brisbane. So we'll go with the fellas over to Brisbane, watch a bit of rugby league and hang out with the fellas.

37:33Mike Minogue:100%. Over to Brisbane there, flights and accommodation included. You and a mate. Thanks to our friends at boystrip.co.nz. Eight games of rugby league, hitting up Caxton Street, being worse for wear the next day, but chucking your boots back on and getting back out. Getting stuck into it, being a backbone. Let's go to the phone lines. G'day, Luke, you mad bastard. How's life? Bloody good, mate. Yeah, good on you. You already sound like a backbone. Tell me, Luke, what do you do for a crust? I'm a plumber, gas for the drain layer. Oh, you're a backbone. Triple backbone. What did he say? A plumber and a what?

38:04Trifecta. The trifecta. Gas for the drain layer. Oh, yeah, backbone.

38:07Mike Minogue:Gas for the drain layer, Jase. Clean out your ears, man. Pardon? That's great stuff, Luke. Now tell me, obviously you love your Muck Malik. Who's your favourite warrior?

38:19I'm a pretty big fan of Jackson Ford. Oh, yeah? Yeah, yeah. Yeah, a lot of muck here in the middle. Backbones up the front. Yeah. A few backbones. Now, if you're one man, who would you bring with you? Great question. I'd probably use it as a bit of a currency. I'd probably see whoever buys me the most beers between now and then. Yeah, okay. Nice. Nice.

38:39Mike Minogue:And Luke, who's your favourite Parramatta eel?

38:45Oh, it's a tough one.

38:48Mike Minogue:It's a pretty crucial one, though, man, as far as the competition's concerned. Yeah, we need to know. Okay. I'll have to go with Moses then Mitch Moses yeah yeah I don't mind Mitch he's always a good player what position does he play again Jase? half back yeah well correct 100 % correct you're in the draw Luke mate you hold the line alright? bloody good thanks he's nailed it great stuff Tim you're mad bastard how's life? yeah good thanks fellas yeah good thanks what do you say? have you had a good day Tim? oh mate I've had a chock of one actually for all of those couple of kids. All right, yeah, I got you.

39:26I've got a question for you, man. Do you put your pants on one leg at a time? Yeah, I do. Yeah, I thought you might. It sounds like a backbone. Just on that, actually, fellas. I'm finding I'm really losing my... Because I do one leg at a time. I'm losing my balance. I'm putting one leg in and I'm getting a bit wobbly on it. You couldn't put two legs on it. Are you sitting on the bed, man? That could be a mistake. Well, no, because I like to do it standing up like a backbone. I don't need to sit down to put my pants on. So you want to do two legs at a time? Is that what you're telling us? No, I'm just saying I'm doing one.

39:59Sorry about this, Tim. Sorry, Tim's still on the line.

40:01Mike Minogue:I was wondering when you put your third leg in. Tim, stop it. That's strapped to my first leg, Tim. Jase, put a little tick next to Tim's. Yeah, it was good stuff, Tim. Stay on the line, mate. Big Dilly will take care of you. G'day, Megan. I haven't got her on the line yet. Come on, man. Come on, Keezy. Tim was still on the line, man. There you go. Hi, Megan. How's life? Hey, guys. I'm good. How are you going? Yeah, good. Thank you, Megan. What do you do for a crust? I'm just laughing at your last conversation. All right. Do you put your legs... What's your order of legs going into your pants?

40:39Are you one at a time or two at a time? Look, it's got to depend on how early in the morning it is. The balance is off if you're not awake yet. Yeah.

40:46Mike Minogue:You know. 100 % Megan, 100%. And just quickly, Megan, just while we've got you, what do you do for a crust? I work to bring in business events into Christchurch. Oh, backbone. Backbone. Good on you, mate. You're a weapon. Hey, just be careful, Megan. Old Keezy might hit you with one of his facts. He's prone to give the ladies a fact. This yarn about Keezy's facts to chat up the ladies isn't a real thing. Okay, Moggy? Although, Megan, I did hear the other day that people using please and thank you with ChatGPT is using heaps and heaps of power and water. That is an interesting fact, and I believe that one.

41:23Mike Minogue:Yeah, thanks, mate. What are you up to later, by the way? I'm joking, Megan. You're in the draw, mate. All right, you hold the line. Thank you. Oh, Keezy. You've still got it, man. Thanks, man. You are sharp as a touch, mate. You're a charming bastard. And you put on your green velvet curtain jacket. It's corduroy, Jase. You're on fire, mate. Now, listen, speaking of which, there is a great deal coming up after 6 o 'clock, including a bit of advice with meetpattynips69. That's right. It's a real email address, meetpattynips69 at gmail.com. If you need advice on anything, give us an email and you can win a prize.

42:04Mike Minogue:The Hauraki Big Show with Jace, Mike and Keezy. Tune in weekdays at 4 on Radio Hauraki. Welcome back, you massive backbones. Hope your Wednesday night's absolutely going off. You're listening to The Big Show brought to you by Toledo's. Why pause your thirst? Defeat it with Toledo's natural electrolyte drinks. Toledo's. Mogey. Toledo's. Come on, Mogey, man. We've just finally, you know, settled on something and you're ruining it. Am I ruining it? Sorry, guys. You don't mean to, though. I'll try better. It's just I love it so much. I can't wait to tell people what it's all about. It's all about Toledo's.

42:43Absolutely, man.

42:44Mike Minogue:Toledo's.co.nz, order yourself a crate. Fellas, what are the dinner plans tonight, man? Well, this will be coming up next, actually, because I've got a bit of a big show, big dilemma tonight. Re-dinner. Specifically on that very topic, Keezy. It's almost like you can read my mind, man. It is. Can you read his mind? No, no, I can't. It's just that normally at about this time we ask each other what we're having for dinner. Yeah. I don't know what I'm having. Well, you just had a massive meal just before, But then again, you do tend to have four or five dinners every night. So, yeah. Last night I had delicious fish.

43:22It was a snapper keezy. Oh, nice. With a lentil and beetroot salad. A little bit of shaved. What do you call it there? Parmesan? No, shaved. Shaved ham? No, not shaved ham.

43:37Mike Minogue:Shaved ape? Shaved cucumber. Oh, cucumber. Oh, shaved cucumber. Oh, yeah, nice. Bloody delicious it was. And then I had some of the leftover salad today with chicken, and I don't know what I'm going to have when I get home, but I'll tell you tomorrow. Yeah, I'll tell you what. You can't beat a bit of beautiful snapper. You can't. Out of a golf fair. That's so true. I'm really starting to wean myself onto seafood. Wean yourself on. Onto it. Do you remember? Yeah, yeah, yeah. You don't wean on. You wean off. No, but I'm weaning myself on. You suck along. Oh, is it suck along? Yeah. I'm starting to really suck along the old seafood because I'm going to Japan later in the year, and I have been eating fish, and I'm now at the point where I go, yum.

44:18Mike Minogue:Not like, oh, I won't have a lot of that, but oh, yeah, that's yum. Right. Whereas before I was like, huh. Yeah. Yeah, yeah. Because you like your pork mints and your meat. You're a meat man, aren't you, Keezy? Yeah, well, pork mints. It's not so much about what it is, it's how much of it is. How much of it, yeah. And has it been minced? And does it come from a pig? That's basically, um. Up next, the big show, Big Dinner Dilemma. Big servants. Good stuff. In the meantime, here's Stone Temple Pilots. The Hauraki Big Show with Jace, Mike and Kesey. Tune in weekdays at four on Radio Hauraki. Red hot.

44:53Chilli peppers here on the Radio Hauraki Big Show this Wednesday evening. The time is 6.25 and exciting news, New Zealand. The Big Show is on the road again.

45:06Mike Minogue:Oh, we certainly are, Jace. We're hopping in the old Big Show van, which is kind of like the mystery machine from Scooby-Doo. Oh, it is. The separate's got Big Show written on the side. You're like Wilma. I'm like Wilma. Velma. Velma Louise, yeah. I thought you said Wilma from the Flintstones. Yeah, so I'm like Velma. We're in the van. We're heading down to Dunedin. All right, April the 22nd. Are we catching the ferry as well? Because obviously if we're in a van, it's in Dunedin, which is the South Island. There's not a van. Oh, it's a plane. It's an aeroplane. I'm just joking around. Oh, right, okay, yeah.

45:38Mike Minogue:I was just trying to do a bit of theatre of the mind for the audience, them picturing us in a van driving down, you know. With a dog. With a mystery-solving dog. But in reality, we're hopping on a plane and we're flying down to Dunedin there, to Emerson's Dunedin once again. We've been there before. It was a horror of an event. It was. It was huge. Reached capacity early. Bloody good time it was. And we're going down there to celebrate the fact that Emerson's delicious, hazy IPA, Hazed and Confused, is turning 10. Wow. So it was my favourite brew from old Emerson's there, so to go down and celebrate.

46:12Mike Minogue:Yep, 100%. To go down and celebrate with a true friend like the old Hazed and Confused IPA, you know, that means a lot to me. Nice. You know, and not to sort of make a big deal about it, but I think it's the first time ever in big show history that we've done a live show and we had a queue outside the pub. Well, they weren't allowed in. No, because it was too full. That's what I mean. It was absolutely rammed to the gunnels. And in fact, if you remember, there was an individual there that had a tattoo on the small of the back. Oh, she did too. She did. Just above the belt there that said, good eating.

46:45Good eating. Yeah. And yeah.

46:51Mike Minogue:Hey, first hundred people through the door, free backbone tea, fellas. Oh. That's great stuff. That is good stuff. That's good eating. So you want to get there early. You want to get there early. Emerson's Dunedin Wednesday the 22nd of April 4 till 7 Yes And don't forget No don't say what you're gonna say Keezy Do not What? Say what you're about to say Okay I won't All I'll say is You know What you're not allowed to do Oh yes Yeah That's all I'll say Yeah good stuff Man no but do come down We love seeing the punters down in Dunedin Beautiful city isn't it fellas? Dunedin? Yeah Yeah it's all good And I've just bought my new sweatshirt so I'll be toasty as.

47:30That's not new. That's old as. Someone else used to own that. You've worn that like 10 times.

47:35Mike Minogue:Here's Pearl Jam. The Hauraki Big Show with Jace, Mike and Kesey. Tune in weekdays at four on Radio Hauraki. Yes, indeed, Bush there on the Radio Hauraki Big Show this Wednesday evening. But right now it's time for... Be Pretty Nip 69 at gmail.com. Get in touch. With the fellas. Stop yelling over the top of that. I mean, it sounds great. It does. Yeah, it sounds really good. It proves it. It does. Real email address, get in touch, fellas. And we have had someone get in touch. Now, this was a bit of an older one, but I've just gone back and found it. Oh, yeah. And it is from a bloke named Hamish.

48:20Mike Minogue:Carter. No, that's not how this segment works. Isn't it meant to be anonymous? Yeah, but Hamish, he's put his name in there and he said, you know, it's fine. but basically he commonly has vivid dreams that he can remember the next day. Okay. And so for the first time ever, he had one involving the big show. Oh. This is where he says, I swear this is exactly how the dream happened. So I'm just going to read it out for you guys. All right. We'll just sort of interpret it there. In my dream, I was at a house party. The scene kept shifting. One moment I'd be accompanied with my wife and kids and be awkwardly trying to get them to entertain themselves in the corner out of the way of the other guests.

48:57Mike Minogue:The next moment, I'd be accompanied by my workmates and random people who apparently worked for Radio Hauraki. Looking out a window, I spotted Mogi walking into the neighbouring house. Mogi was sporting a bushy salt and pepper beard and a greying fryer tuck haircut that blended into a shaggy mullet. Wow. Interesting, look. Mogi was weeping profusely. In his arms he carried a sleeping child Who I assumed was his daughter By his side walked a faceless woman Who was also weeping and sobbing I presume this was Moggy's wife Right So interesting A hush went through the crowd of party goers The big show received some really bad news today Someone whispered Everyone was immediately sad The dream shifted And I was in an empty room Grey carpet, no furnishings White frosted glass windows cast everything in a dull muted light.

49:52Mike Minogue:In the corner, Hoity J was sitting in an old corduroy brown beanbag. He had a look of deep contemplation on his face. I found myself approaching Hoity J without meaning to. He had a deeply mournful, melancholic air about him. I knew instinctively that I should not disturb him and that Hoity J detested being accosted by random strangers. I knew I should leave Hoity J alone and yet I suddenly heard myself saying, Hey Jace, I know you probably hear this a lot But I just want to say I really like your show It makes me laugh and is great to listen to after a hard day at work In a way you guys are providing a real public service I braced myself expecting scorn and ridicule But instead Hoity J turned to me and beamed a bright golden smile He said nothing but shook my hand in greeting Immediately the light in the room brightened And the party sprang back to life Wow I could hear Mogi's laughter all around me He was not in the room physically but I could hear Mogi repeatedly saying stuff like, how good, it's all good.

50:52Mike Minogue:So weird. The dream then shifted and I was back in the house party again. Keezy was sprawled on the floor in the middle of the room. I looked down to see if he was awake. Something was off. Keezy's face, hair and body all looked normal, just as I'd seen him in promotional pictures and videos previously, but his eyeballs were grossly out of scale, at least two to three times too small for his eye sockets. What's more, the skin of his eyelids was cracked and leathery. the signs I presumed of a lifetime battling eczema. Are you alright Keezy I asked with concern you've got really hooded eyes. I immediately realised I had caused offence Keezy sat bolt upright and started shouting you can F it right off mate.

51:31Mike Minogue:The airy music sound effect from the Uncle Bully fight scene then suddenly played in the background. I tried to calm Keezy down offered him the same greeting I had made to Hoity J earlier do you know how vapid and meaningless that sounds he said in a snide mocking tone Do you know how many people tell me they like the big show? I don't care. You can F right off Hamish. And then the dream shifted. He was in Paris on the street wanting a chocolate croissant. Oh. What do you think it all means? Well, that happened. Did it? Yeah. Did that happen? I don't remember that. About five months ago, yeah.

52:01Holy shit. You were off your face. Was I? Yeah, totally. You were maggot. Hooded eyes. Yeah, right. Shocking. Moody bastard as well. Yeah, totally. Abused Hamish for no reason.

52:12Mike Minogue:Oh, I'm sorry, Hamish. Yeah, I'm sorry about that. I don't remember that. Yeah. Not surprising. Hey, meet pattynips69gmail.com if you need advice on anything or if you've had a dream. Hell of a memory he's got on in there. Amazing. Incredible detail. Yeah. I wonder what the bad news was. Oh, God. Who knows? The Hauraki Big Show. Weekdays from four on Radio Hauraki.

52:44Well there you go you mad bastards That's the big show done and dusted This Wednesday evening What a pleasure it's been bringing it to you In the meantime what's the podcast outro clip today Keezy?

52:55Mike Minogue:Today's clip is entitled Go Hard And it comes out at 7.30 tonight Just search Haraki Big Show Wherever you get your podcast from Get him, get him, get him And then I was like I need you to be on I need you to be on form Pugs and he was like, I got you, man. Yeah. So he's going hard with me. He said, no, you can't imagine Pug's going hard. Nah, Pug's going hard. He does go hard. I've seen him go hard. Oh, really? He's the hardest out of all of us. Like now, especially trying to keep up with his young missus, he is going hard. Oh, well, that's true. But even still, actually, he probably is, yeah.

53:22He's out till 5 a.m.

53:23Mike Minogue:like most weekends. Yeah, that's true. Keeping up with the young missus. That's right. And I definitely have seen Pug's go hard. Yeah, right. Okay. Well, of course, old Pug's on there. He's away in Vietnam. Yes. Following in the great footsteps of old Horty Jizzbot. And he'll be back on Monday, won't he? I think so. Is that right? Yeah, or something like that. And he'll be sort of full of regrets now because he's wasted. It's all good at the start of the holiday. You're like, great, I've got this holiday in front of me. But then towards the end, you're like, oh, I've wasted all this money. Yeah.

53:54On my silly little jaunt.

53:56Mike Minogue:Really? Is that how you feel after a holiday? No, no, no. But he will. And especially because he gets those wacky little tats as well. You know what I mean? What do you think he's going to have? like a tuk-tuk or something like that. Yeah, probably. A panda and a tuk-tuk. Yes. Mogi, what are your plans tonight? Look, the world's my oyster hoity jizz. I don't know. I don't know. I might go to the gym. Why not? I was contemplating going to the gym. Well, because I can't be bothered. Yeah, true. So I might sit down and flick through sort of six or seven different media platforms and search for something to look, all in vain, of course, before ultimately going off to bed until about 8.20.

54:34Nice.

54:35Mike Minogue:Wow, that sounds great. Keezy, what are you having for dinner? Tonight we are having a red curry for dinner. Nice. Chicken thigh. Pork mince. Oh, yeah. Chicken thigh. I wish. Pork mince. I've got to go pick up a single bed. Oh, yeah, that's one of your little truckie. You've got to go do that now, then go home, have curry, and then watch the second half of Love It All List It UK. Are you getting that single bed? Why is that for your side of the bed? No, Bogie. I'm getting that to put in our third bedroom so it can be styled as a bedroom and we sell it. Yeah. Well, you'll need it beside the bed, though, after your third helping of your red curry.

55:10Mike Minogue:Yeah. No. No, I won't. All right? What are you doing tonight, Hoody J? I am off to meet my wife for a bit of Thai. You are, man. Yeah, man. And by the way, in terms of I've solved the big show, big dilemma, we're going to try the new place. Good on you, mate. Hey, check out the podcast. Check out the Instagram. Till tomorrow. See you later. Bye.