FULL SHOW: Spicing It Up

8:35Mike Minogue:It sucks.

8:35Keyzie:That's true. Just on that front, fellas, I went to an investment sort of broker a little while back.

8:42Mike Minogue:Oh, rich guy. Listen to this guy. Moneybags. All of them. Old curry rolls, Hoyt.

8:46Keyzie:And we were talking about a certain amount of money, right? How much? I'm not going to say. And then he was - For round numbers, should we just say$10 million? Just say$10 million, round numbers.

8:58Mike Minogue:Fuck, rich guy.

9:00Keyzie:But then he sort of was trying to get us to invest like$20 million. And it's like, no, no, no, we've only got this amount to invest. That's right. And so why are you telling me all this stuff that I don't have the money? That's unnecessary. But it's the same with everything. It's the same when you go to buy a car and you say, this is my price range. They're going to show you something that's more expensive. $14 ,000 more or something.

9:23Mike Minogue:Yeah, yeah, yeah. But that's what's annoying. I understand if I had a million dollars and they showed me a$1.2 million house, but it's when you're showing me a$3 million house or even a$1.4 million. It's just so far. It's not even necessarily that they're trying to upsell you. In that case, it's just like, look at what you could be buying, loser. It's showing me what I can't afford and rubbing it in my face. That's right. Anyway, if there is a real estate agent that wants to call up 0800 Hauraki and actually say what is going on there and hopefully change my opinion on them because I hate salesy stuff like that.

9:53Mike Minogue:Tactics. Tactics, man. God. Oh, Lenny. Remember that time his downstairs fell out of his pants, man? Yeah, yeah, yeah.

10:03Keyzie:God. Stud, though. Those are the days.

10:09Mike Minogue:The Hauraki Big Show with Jase, Mike and Keezy. Tune in weekdays at four on Radio Hauraki.

10:15Keyzie:She-hard there on the Radio Hauraki Big Show this Friday afternoon. The time is 4.24. And fellas, I'm going to make it official. I'd like to officially invite all of you backbones and your lovely wives and partners to Hoity J's next Friday for a meal.

10:36Mike Minogue:Is this your new apartment in the city? Yes.

10:42Keyzie:With Hoity J. So it's official. Put it in your diaries. Now, a couple of things. I've got some bad news to start off with. Of course you do. There was some conjecture about, I'll just get some takeaways. We'll just make it very casual. or it'll be tickety-boo. Did your Mrs. kibosh that? Yes. Yep. She did. Yep. And she said, oh, no, no, no, we won't be doing that. Oh, what? Oh, I'm going to cook something. Oh, wow, really?

11:13Mike Minogue:Great.

11:14Keyzie:Yeah. Now, look. Can I just make a request, Jase? Yeah, sure. I had to put it out there to let you know. Yeah, yum. For me, I don't like broccoli salad. Just. Okay, so no broccoli salad. I'll pass that on.

11:32Mike Minogue:I don't mind whatever she's making. Literally just happy to be there.

11:35Keyzie:Okay, but I've guaranteed that it's not going to be a pasta. Good shit. But I don't know what's going to end up on the plate. But what I will do to sort of mitigate that is I'll have a very large platter of cold meats, cheeses, breads and crackers. You all right with that, Pugs?

11:55Mike Minogue:Oh, look, Pugs is here. Ooh, it's Pugs. Yeah, I'm Kane Az, man. Thanks for having me. I'm really excited.

12:03Keyzie:Now, I think I found a good playlist. Because when I'm walking back to the apartment with my skull candies on every day, I'm getting some tunes, man. It's very mild. It's a bit depressing. But I think it'll be perfect for ambiance. Unless, of course, you guys want to sort of agree on something before you arrive. No, it's all on your head, man. It's all on your shoulders. Now there's also been a very interesting point made by our boss, Toddy, and he was very keen, and I don't know how you guys feel about this, live streaming it.

12:40Keyzie:Kind of feels like work at that point. Yeah. Well, maybe just someone in the corner. Filming us. Filming us. Or is that just going to make everyone really uncomfortable and stuff?

12:52Mike Minogue:Well, I mean, we could bring Dilly. Yeah, big Dilly's probably free in the office there. But he's probably going to want to sit at the table. Yeah, that would be just awkward.

12:59Keyzie:I don't want him touching the food and the drinks and stuff.

13:01Mike Minogue:Well, we could bring Dilly and we could say, hey, Dilly, who's our social media online guy, we could just say, hey, man, for this evening, you're pretty much just going to have to be like a tripod. Yeah. Yes, just do your job. He's always been a tripod. Shut up.

13:12Keyzie:I will provide beersies and wines. Really? Yeah, I will. Wow. Well, I noticed a couple of crates.

13:23Mike Minogue:Yeah, you're going to steal them from the ACC. Yeah, yeah. Ultra, you know, export stuff.

13:28Keyzie:So just to let you know, even though you and I, Moggy, we won't be indulging in that, I just want you fellas to know, because you're probably thinking, God, going there's going to be really awkward and I won't even be able to get to suck piss.

13:39Mike Minogue:Well, I'll probably come with a bottle of wine anyway. Yeah, okay. Keep your offers here when you arrive. Yeah, good, good. Yeah, cool.

13:44Keyzie:So lock it in, fellas. It's 7.30 Friday, the whatever it is. Next Friday. Next Friday. It's done and dusted. and what does the audience feel about live streaming it? 3483, let us know.

13:57Mike Minogue:Yeah, okay. Yeah, let us know. Also, Pugs' partner is vegetarian. Will you be catering for that? Yeah, that's true. Honestly, she can just eat piss. As long as there's piss there, she'll be there. She'll just eat piss. Yeah. She's going to eat piss. What a witness. Hey, Jase, Pugs' missus, she's going to eat piss. It's not that kind of party here, pugs Okay, sorry, yeah You can save that till like that And also, just before we sign off on this, just quickly

14:27Keyzie:And no buzies, pugs It's not one of your weird buzzy parties, alright? I'm not going

14:32Mike Minogue:I'm not going either then, I'm out The Hauraki Big Show with Jace, Mike and Keezy Tune in weekdays at 4 on Radio Hauraki

14:43Keyzie:What's this? A Radio Hauraki bar tab? Yes, indeed, let's give away some meat and some cash. But first, we need to get people on the draw, don't we, fellas?

14:56Mike Minogue:Yeah. Certainly do, Jase. Every single day this week, thanks to Beef and Lamb New Zealand, we've been giving away a meat pack and$100 cash. All you have to do is listen out for the queue to call because it's National Lamb Day on Sunday. That's so true, man. Razor-chop, fellas.

15:10Keyzie:Really, really excited about that. It's a hell of a few days, isn't it? Because today's Friday the 13th, then it's Valentine's Day, and then you get to round out a massive weekend with Lamb Day. Yeah, how good, man. How good. Three in a row. Crazy. Doosh, doosh, doosh. G'day, Scott, you mad bastard. How's life? Oh, yeah. It's fucking Scott Gueno. All good, man. Yeah, that's good, man. Hey, tell me, Scott, what do you do for a crust? Ah, swing on a few spinners, eh? Oh, yeah, yeah. Yeah, nice. Mate, you like a bit of meat, do you, Scott? Oh, yeah, no doubt. No doubt. Sweet, mate.

15:47Mike Minogue:All right, well, you're in the draw, Scott. Keep your phone on. We might call you later on with some cash, all right? Yeah, boy. Awesome. Cheers, guys. Good on you, mate.

15:53Keyzie:G'day, Sam, you mad bastard. How's life? Yeah, good, mate. Yourself? Yeah, not bad, Sam. Not bad. What do you do for a crust, you massive backbone? I'm a chippy. No, yeah. Back, mate. Yeah, you're finished for the day, ever, Sam? Going to have a few cold ones now?

16:10Mike Minogue:Yeah, mate. Looking to get home and eat some piss, I think. Yeah. Old Pugs' partner's going to be around Sam's house.

16:16Keyzie:Oh, yeah, how good, man. Good on you, Sam. Well, you sound the line as well, and Pugs will sort you out. And finally, James, how's life? Good, mate. Yourself? Yeah, good, thanks, James. Tell me, James, what do you do for a crust?

16:30Mike Minogue:I swing off the arse end of a hammer all day.

16:33Keyzie:Oh, yeah, another chippy, eh?

16:34Mike Minogue:Another backbone. It could be a blacksmith. Could be just a guy that owns a hammer. Yeah. What is it, James? I've got lots of hammers. I've got lots of hammers in here. All right, all right. Jesus, come out for a fight, James. Oh, man. Jeez. Meat hammer. Meat hammer. The old meat hammer.

16:51Keyzie:Hey, James, what's the plan tonight, mate?

16:56Mike Minogue:Kids are going to be home soon, so just a good family time.

17:00Keyzie:Yeah, good on you, mate. You sound like you resented that a little bit when you said that, family time. Oh, no, man, I'm in.

17:09Mike Minogue:Nice, James. All right, well, you keep your phone on too, brother, and we could be calling you with some meat and some cash, all right? Cheers, Keasy. Good on you, James.

17:16Keyzie:Old Keezy over there. Good stuff, fellas. What are you doing tonight, Keezy? Yeah, Keezy. Why? I'm just curious. What are you up to? What's on the agenda for old Keezy?

17:26Mike Minogue:Do you genuinely want to know?

17:28Keyzie:Yeah, genuinely. Yeah.

17:29Mike Minogue:You're not going to make fun of it? No. Well, it depends.

17:31Keyzie:Well, it depends what it is, yeah, to be fair.

17:32Mike Minogue:So my wife and I are going to go to the supermarket. We're going to pick something to have for dinner tonight. Already, I'm worried. Because we can't decide. Yeah. And then. So you're going to do it together? It's a little outing. Yeah, because she suggested lamb chops, and I said. That's Sunday. It's National Lamb Day on Sunday. Let's save it for them. Yes. You're smart. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And then we're going to eat some ice cream that we've got in a tub in the freezer at home. We're going to make ice cream cones. And then we're going to watch a movie. I want to watch potentially like another Ron Howard movie.

17:59Mike Minogue:Yeah, sure. Like the Apollo 13, is it? Yes. She wants to watch the Pike River movie. So we're going to decide which one of those two we watch, and then we'll eat ice cream. How are you going to decide? We'll probably watch Pike River because it was her one. Yeah That's usually I've heard though That's a good way to decide You sit back and you think Now which one does she want to watch And I just go Oh I'll watch it

18:19Keyzie:Yeah I'll watch it That'll do I've heard it's very good Yeah That movie Very very good Yeah I've heard it's very very good as well I just

18:27Mike Minogue:I know yeah It's just yeah Yeah

18:29Keyzie:It's not going to be too spooky for her or anything

18:32Mike Minogue:Spooky? Yeah

18:34Keyzie:No but She's not going to get a fright or get anxious

18:36Mike Minogue:No no no No she won't because she knows I don't want her calling me again at midnight Keezy and tears She won't, Jase, because she knows that this Sunday is National Lamb Day and we'll be firing up the barbecue and raising a chop with all of our friends and family. Hang on a minute. What?

18:51Keyzie:Here's Cage the Elephant. Here's Cage the Elephant.

18:55Mike Minogue:The Hauraki Big Show. Weekdays from four on Radio Hauraki.

18:59Keyzie:The Black Crows there on the Radio Hauraki Big Show this Friday afternoon. The time is 4.48. Let's talk TV. What's on the telly with Mike Minogue

19:15How good's TV? Doesn't it feel weird to you at that start that we're not doing that anymore?

19:19Mike Minogue:Yes. I would like it if we just went, yeah! Yeah, something. It needs something there. It feels weird because we're deliberately trying not to do it. Well, can we just go? And nobody's talking. We've just got to keep it short and sharp. But there needs to be something there. It's wrong. It's not right. Can you start it again, man? Okay, you want to start from the top? Okay, hang on.

19:38Keyzie:What's on the telly with Mike Minogue?

19:44Keyzie:Yeah! That's better, isn't it? You see, I think initially... I just don't want you taking the piss and taking it on for ages, Jase. What I was going to say, Mogi, is that's how it used to be a while back, and then you started just losing your mind over it. And the fans loved it, man. That was all of our idea, Jase. You've got to take some of the credit too, man. And you, Keezy, you loved it, didn't you?

20:04Mike Minogue:I gave it four buzzies out of five. Fellas, I didn't watch anything last night. I was in bed by about seven minutes past eight because I've had several bad sleeps in a row, and it was a great sleep, and I'm feeling much better. Thanks very much. How many buzzies out of five was the sleep? Four and a half. Wow, that was a good sleep. That's good stuff. That was a good sleep.

20:23Keyzie:Fellas, last night I was stuffing my face with spicy chicken dumplings, and I started watching a series called The Burning Girls. Reverend Jack Brocks and her daughter arrive in Chapel Croft a place for a fresh start that soon reveals its community's dark history and where ancient superstitions and mistrust of outsiders are quite common stars Samantha Morton Samantha Morton she was in the film River Queen famously directed by Vincent Ward she had him stood down from the film as the star Kiefer Sutherland of course also in that film and had somebody else come and direct it Vincent Ward had been working on that film for 20 years trying to get that up and running and she did that to him she is a horrendous human being and I have no time for her very good actor though yeah she is she was also in that film with Tom Cruise where they have those three beings it's a futuristic one the three beings lying in the swimming pools and they can see the future Ah, damn it.

21:31Mission Impossible.

21:32Keyzie:That's it. Yeah, good stuff. Minority Report. As it sounds there in the description I just gave, it's kind of weird stuff, superstitious stuff, sort of suspicious locals, suspicious stuff going on all over the place. It's a step above that a little bit. It's actually a pretty good series. It's quite compelling. It's not amazing, but it's certainly a good enough watch for Hoere Che. It's on TVNZ+. Plus, I'll give it 3.1 buzzies. And it's called The Burning Girls. The Burning Girls.

22:04Mike Minogue:I started last night watching A Night of the Seven Kingdoms. Yeah. On Neon, which I was very, to be honest, I was like, I wasn't even in the mood to watch it. And then I started watching it. And then by the end of the episode, because I think that first episode is 40 minutes long. It is, yeah. They're all about that, I think. Which is great, because Game of Thrones, you really had to commit, and it was excellent. Well, the first seasons were, but it was like an hour of your time. whereas this one because it's just 40 minutes you find it easier to chuck it on and the other thing that this series is doing that game it was House of the Dragon yes the first spin off don't even I know the thing that this series is doing is that the characters are likeable I want the main guy to be successful yeah whereas I hated everyone in House of the Dragons and nothing really happened but also this one is funny it's brought the humour back in whereas House of Dragons was super earnest no humour in it whatsoever ever and it's hard to take something serious when it's dragons and shit and it was boring and don't get me started on the hairstyles but also the other thing with um this a knight of the seven kingdoms is the guy the main character and i won't spoil it but when he says his name and comes up with his name to be a knight because he's basically trying to pretend that he's a knight yeah i've heard that guy's name referenced in game of thrones so i was like oh wow right because i I think Ned Stark or whoever mentioned it, I've heard his name mentioned before.

23:26Mike Minogue:Right. That's cool. Yeah, man. So honestly, I've watched the first two episodes. I was eating a butter chicken when I sat down and watched the first one.

23:33Keyzie:Was there some left after the other night?

23:36Mike Minogue:And at the very start of the episode, it starts with him just like basically backing one out in quite a gratuitous fashion. Yes. As I was eating my butter chicken, and I was like, oh, is this what this show's going to be? Is it? But it was excellent. I give it 4.1 buzzies out of five. I've heard the latest episode, however, is excellent. Yes.

23:53Keyzie:It's like really good. It's a real cliffhanger.

23:56Mike Minogue:So I can't wait. Yes. So I can't wait to get there. I'm really enjoying it, and that's on Neon.

23:59Keyzie:Great stuff. Here's a bit of Franz Ferdinand.

24:02Mike Minogue:The Hauraki Big Show, weekdays from four on Radio Hauraki.

24:06Keyzie:Yes, indeed, Franz Ferdinand there on the Radio Hauraki Big Show this Friday afternoon. The time, 4.57, coming up after five, as always, on a Friday, the Friday throbber. Of course, the theme today, Valentine's Day. Ah. Ah.

24:21Mike Minogue:So what love-themed songs? Yeah, or relationship-themed. I reckon anything to do with, wow, people in relationships. Yeah, nice. Yeah, yeah, that sounds good. Also, after 5-2, I haven't heard the Reburger Sting play yet. Or trying to be in relationships. Yeah, totally. Yeah. I haven't heard the Reburger Sting play yet, so if you hear it, remember to call 0800 Hauraki and you could win a$50 Reburger voucher.

24:43Keyzie:Good stuff, man.

24:47Mike Minogue:The Hauraki Big Show with Jase, Mike and Keezy. Tune in weekdays at 4 on Radio Hauraki.

24:56Mike Minogue:It's the Hauraki Big Show's Friday Throbber. Douche, douche. I look forward to this every week more than the Throbbers. Joe's blowing that. I've got a massive mental block with that one now. I don't know what's happening. Because when I play the Throbber Sting, the opener there, in my head I'm like, please have forgotten. Please have forgotten. I've always forgotten until I hear the music. Then I'm like, oh, yeah. And then the next thing I think is, oh, Joe's won't remember. Yeah. And if people don't know what we're talking about, we always, for some reason, go douche, douche. Yes. But Jase always forgets.

25:28Keyzie:If you're by chance joining us for the very first time and you're going, what the hell's a Friday thrubber? Each of the fellas in the studio here, we pick a tune to sort of kick off your Friday, your weekend kind of vibes. Then you give us a call on 0800 Hauraki. Tell us the tune you want to play and the first of two wins. Absolutely right. Fellas, this week it's a Valentine's theme. I'll go first this week if you don't mind. Sure. This one, I didn't have a lot of time on me, but I do love this song, and it's Grounds for Divorce from Elbow. I cannot humble for you. Yeah.

26:14And that's Grounds for Divorce. If you forget Valentine's Day, fellas, you're in a world of trouble, aren't you? I've never heard that before.

26:21Mike Minogue:That song? But I like it Oh that song rules You know when you hear a song Like quite a few songs It takes you a few listens But straight away I was like I like that song Oh that's a goodie Yeah What did you pick Jase?

26:31Keyzie:Something that I think Is a good Good Friday vibe Can I say Can I say Oh that's got me thinking What's that band You always do the Deftones?

26:39Mike Minogue:Yeah tell me You haven't done I bet it's a Deftones song If this is the Deftones song Sex tape I'm going to be furious What is it?

26:46Keyzie:Well you'll play it And find out

26:49Mike Minogue:Ah I've been really trying Yes.

26:52Keyzie:Baby. Trying to hold back this feeling for so long

26:59Mike Minogue:Oh yeah, baby. And if you... I love Marvin Gaye. Yes, same. He's very cool. Is it a throbber? No. No. Is it a great song? Yes. 100%. Should it be banned because it's not a throbber? Yes. Will it get an asterisk if it wins? Yes. Yeah. I love Marvin Gaye. Absolutely. 100%. Are you kidding me? It's great. I hope that song wins. Now, fellas, for my Valentine's Day-themed throbber, it's hard finding a throbber with romance in the topic. That's an actual throbber. But I managed to find one. Well done. And it just so happens that he's coming to the country later this year.

27:35Keyzie:I can wait a moment more Tell me when, when, when, when Say it's me that you adore

27:49Mike Minogue:Oh, that's a tune, man. And then, darling, tell me when Inglebert Humperdink. Or as someone texted her yesterday, Inglebert Shit Crispadink.

28:01Keyzie:Which he should change his name to. I was saying to Keezy, my wife's very keen on that gig. Oh, yeah, good. So we're all going to go. It's going to be good times, good times. Hey, but you decide, New Zealand. Give us a call right now on 0800 Hauraki. In the meantime, here's the Arctic Monkeys.

28:15Mike Minogue:The Hauraki Big Show with Jace, Mike and Kesey. Tune in weekdays at four on Radio Hauraki.

28:24Keyzie:It's the Hauraki Big Show's Friday throbber. Douche douche. Yes. Doesn't count. Nailed it. Nailed it, fellas. Good for you. The theme today, Valentine's Day.

28:39Mike Minogue:That's right. This is where we each pick a song. You guys help vote by calling 0800 Hauraki, the first to get two votes will be played in full. And don't forget, when we have a winner, to text in on 3483 and let us know what you think of the winning song. For example, a great text has come through here. G'day, guys. Has there ever been a throbber where no one called in because all the songs were shit? Close. We had one a couple of weeks ago. Yeah, we did, actually. It took a long time for the phones to start ringing. We just managed to scrape in. Yeah. Not today, though, because we picked some absolute dudes.

29:12Yeah, some real good songs. What was the name of this one? Albo is the name of the band and Grounds for Divorce is the name of the song.

29:35Tune. It is a tune. The only rockin' tune of the three this week, fellas, but don't want it to sway anyone's vote. Asterisk. Yeah, totally.

29:46Mike Minogue:Jase, what absolute doozy of a song that you choose, man. Let's get it on, Keezy.

29:53Keyzie:I've been really trying, baby Trying to hold back this feeling for so long And if you feel like I feel, baby Oh, come on

30:11Mike Minogue:Oh, come on Let's get it on

30:17Keyzie:Yeah, baby. Doesn't that just make you feel like making love, fellas?

30:23Mike Minogue:Love, fellas? And then a comedy tune from Keezy. Yesterday I sort of got very excited because one of my favourite singers when I'm steamed is coming to New Zealand, Inglebert Humperdinck. He's going to be 90 when I see him perform, but I tell you what. Do you reckon he'll make it? We should put money on it. Yeah, it's actually a good call. I don't know about it, but I'm going to go see him live, and this song's an absolute throbber. I can wait a moment more. That's a dirty verse.

30:53Keyzie:Tell me when, when, when, when. Say it's me that you adore. Doesn't that just make you want to make love, fellas? A little pan flute in the background there.

31:07Mike Minogue:I love songs with flute in it. Yeah, cool. It's great stuff. Not enough flautists getting about.

31:13Keyzie:Let's go to the phone lines. G'day, Lucas, you mad bastard. What are you running with?

31:17Mike Minogue:G'day, Phil. I think I might go with you. What do you do? Oh, okay. Good choice, man.

31:21Keyzie:Yeah, good on you, mate. Good choice, brother. Good stuff. Let's go to Big Red from the Tron. G'day, Big Red. G'day, mate. G'day, mate. What are you running with there?

31:30Mike Minogue:I'm going with the jizzle, mate. No!

31:32Keyzie:Too easy. Bang, bang. Yeah, mate. The jizzle.

31:35Mike Minogue:Good on you, Jase. Big win there. Thanks, Big Red. Well, that was easy. pretty cut and dry there. Yeah, it was.

31:40Keyzie:Get it done. Get it done. Let's play it out. Yeah, let's do it.

31:44Mike Minogue:Marvin Gaye, let's get it on. Text us 3483. How do you feel about Jase's win on today's Friday Throbber? Yes. The Hauraki Big Show. Weekdays from four on Radio Hauraki.

31:56Keyzie:Yeah, baby. Let's get it on. Marvin Gaye, there you're Friday Throbber.

32:01Mike Minogue:Lots of texts coming through on 3483. Sorry, this is the most amount of texts we've had. Yeah, yeah, yeah. G'day there fellas Now this is a proper jizz bot throbber It's from William Good on you William Might unironically be the greatest throbber of all It's from Liam In traffic fighting the urge to not make love to myself Absolute tune Yeah Jase my pants just went tight Robbie says Bloody hell guys there's going to be another baby boom So it really has What about this one here Absolute banger Got my wife frisky on our honeymoon Now, if you need to play Marvin Gaye to get your wife, Risky, on your honeymoon, I hope they're still together.

32:40Keyzie:Yeah, in two years' time.

32:41Mike Minogue:Well, that honeymoon might have been, I don't know, 40 years ago. It could have been. By the sounds of it. All right, let's go to a score update on the Throbber scoreboard. Out in front on two wins, Keezy and Jase. In last place on one win, Old Mogey. Yeah, just heard another text come through on 3483. Effing kill me, how do you guys get away with this shit? That's probably from the manager of our station Yeah, yeah He'll be fuming I loved it, Jase, genuinely Marvin Gaye rules, man

33:12Keyzie:He does He's the man

33:14Mike Minogue:Here's Weezer The Hauraki Big Show With Jase, Mike and Kesey Tune in weekdays at 4 on Radio Hauraki

33:21Keyzie:Bush there on the Radio Hauraki Big Show This Friday afternoon The time, 5.29 Fellas, of course it's Valentine's Day tomorrow the three of us we've been in relationships for a long time with our partners but also really with each other we've now been in a relationship with each other for very nearly five years and the audience has certainly started to notice that the chemistry is waning number one and also that we're running out of ideas so I've gone ahead and I went down to one of the local sex shops and there's dozens of them around here and I've got this You're here to tell me that, Moggy. And I've got this little board game, and in this board game it's got some cards, and on the cards are suggestions.

34:06Now, generally speaking, the suggestions would be for you and your partner, but we're going to make it for us, co-hosts.

34:13Mike Minogue:And this is going to fix our chemistry? Just as an idea, yeah, just to spice things up, sort out our chemistry and give us a few ideas. All right, so should we take turns? I think so. All right.

34:27Yeah. I've got one. This is just an example. Yeah. Okay. Yes.

34:36With your co-host in his undies, slip your fingers under the fabric and sensuously stroke his buttocks.

34:49Mike Minogue:Sweet. So are we going to... What are we doing? Well, these are just suggestions. We can decide on whether we want to do that. But I think we settle on probably a top three. We can do that often. Okay, all right. You got one there? That one's not in it for me. I think you go.

35:04Keyzie:Me go, because I think this is good. With all of the co-hosts fully clothed, simulate vigorous athletic doggy-style sex with your co-host bent over a table. Spice it up by talking dirty and spanking them.

35:27Mike Minogue:That's probably not in my top three either, to be honest. That's got... I'm not ruling it out. No, look. I'm open. All right, I'm just going to pick one. Expose your co-host's bottom and put them over your knee with their buttocks in the air.

35:48Mike Minogue:Caress the cleft of their buttocks and spank them. Test their pain threshold. and stop as soon as the pain becomes too much. Oh, I like that one. That's probably in my top three now. Yeah, definitely. They're all good, aren't they? Wow. Kiss your co-host roughly. Grab his buttocks and pull them towards you. Place a finger in his mouth. Hold his hair tightly, etc. You can do anything you like. I don't know about that one.

36:28Keyzie:Here we go, fellas.

36:32Keyzie:Improvise the following erotic scenario. Oh, yeah. Your co-host is a nymphomaniac. What is this? Who has called the doctor out for a home visit, pretending that they are ill.

36:50Mike Minogue:That's probably the closest we'll get to actually getting you to a doctor, Jack. Oh, this one. It's bathe and massage your co-host's feet, then suck their toes one by one and sensuously lick the arch of their foot. Yeah.

37:11Mike Minogue:The Hauraki Big Show, weekdays from four on Radio Hauraki. Who wants free, Biggie? Dish, dish, dish, dish.

37:21Keyzie:Yum. It's a catchy little tune, isn't it?

37:24Mike Minogue:I like it because it goes from on Hodaki you're listening and you hear like a song playing that was Cake going the distance. Yes. And then all of a sudden, Who wants me here?

37:32Keyzie:Hey, Berger. Let's go to the phone lines.

37:36Mike Minogue:Oh, yes. Just a reminder for those listening, if you hear this, to call straight away on 0800 Hodaki, you can get a voucher. It'll play during a song. Straight away.

37:45Keyzie:Yeah, good stuff. G'day, Craig, you massive backbone. How's life? All right. What is day, you mad bastard? How are you going? Yeah, good, thanks, mate. Good, good. How's the beautiful Tauranga today? It's raining, but it's beautiful as always.

38:00Mike Minogue:Good on you. Hey, Craig, I'm from Tauranga, man. Which part are you in? In the city. Oh, the avenues, man. The avenues, correct it is. Nice, mate. Yeah, good stuff.

38:10Keyzie:And tell me, Craig, what do you do for a crust? I run makatou pies. Now, the makatou pie there, the one that I often go for is the fish number. Yes, indeed. I think it might be a smoked fish number. Would that be right? That'd be right, smoked fish. It's a bloody good eating pie, that bastard. I actually love a smoked fish pie. Do you? Very keen. Yeah, very keen.

38:36Mike Minogue:Are you angling for free pies?

38:37Keyzie:No, I'm actually not on this occasion, but I do like a smoked fish pie.

38:41Mike Minogue:Nice. Angling?

38:43Keyzie:If he was angling for a fish pie, he wouldn't catch one.

38:46Mike Minogue:Yeah, well, exactly.

38:47Keyzie:Because he's never caught one. Exactly. I'm not saying at all, Craig, that you sent us up some pies. God.

38:53Mike Minogue:Jeez. Hey, Craig, hang on. So he's called us for a$50 Reburger voucher and now he's sending us pies. Congratulations, Craig. You're our winner. Yeah, so remember, if you hear the sting, you call up and then you give us stuff. Yeah, that's right. Now, Craig, before I send you a voucher, man, just double-check a few things. Make sure you're not AI, all right? Go for it. What's for dinner? Something with chicken number. Cajun chicken number. Oh, yeah, nice. Nice, yeah. I like Cajun chicken. All right, how often do you floss, Craig? Never. Yeah, okay, good. Truth. Yeah, I've smelled his breath. It's horrific.

39:30Mike Minogue:Hey, Craig, what colour are your undies? Black. Yeah, okay. And Craig, final question, what is your deepest fear? Oh, missing out. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.

39:44Keyzie:Very good.

39:45Mike Minogue:Very good. Well, the good news is, Craig, you're not missing out on a re-burger voucher, right, mate? We'll send one out to you. You're an absolute champion. Thanks, TZ.

39:52Keyzie:No worries, Craig. Thanks, mate. It's not Keezy giving it to you. It's us giving it to you, Craig. Thank him, man.

39:58Mike Minogue:Old Keezy's giving it to you. Thanks, Keezy. Yeah, good on you, mate. Righto. Nice fella. Yeah, reminder, if you hear that sting, call us 0800 at Hodaki. Also, the other day, fellas, Pug spent ages working on a new chicken chat sting. Oh, yeah. And he's worried we're not going to use it. Do you have any chicken chat that we could do just so that I could play the sting?

40:20Keyzie:We'll be able to think of something for sure We're going to play it Chicken chat

40:25Mike Minogue:With me, Keezy Oh, it's with you, Keezy What have you got for us, Keezy? You can't just play that bloody stinger Not doing anything I had dumplings the other day And I usually get pork You got chicken and they were really yum You've already done that on the show Was that on the show? Yeah, yeah, yeah.

40:48Keyzie:Repeating material. What about that one? If you're going to repeat chicken material, it should be the one about you getting up at 12.30 at night, your missus catching you in the light of the fridge, scoffing down, but a chicken. This is such a weird yarn. With a sauce in your penis.

41:04Mike Minogue:It's such a weird yarn. Well, it's a true one, though.

41:07Keyzie:The thing about Liz, can't you just see it in your mind's eye? Well, this is the extraordinary thing, because I want to remind everyone about that day where he had 15 dumplings for lunch. He then ate about eight pieces of pizza. He did. During the show. He did. He texted his wife and said, What's for dinner? What's for dinner?

41:28Mike Minogue:No, I didn't.

41:29Keyzie:He then had portments when he got home and his wife had leftovers from butter chicken from the night before. And when she was fast asleep, totally naked, he went to the fridge. He crept out of bed. He crept out of bed and ate just with his hands butter chicken and got butter chicken sauce in his pews.

41:49Mike Minogue:No, you forgot the part where I had it on the ground and I was eating it like Gollum. That's right. With my hands, yeah. That's right. And that is a 100 % true yarn, and I'm glad that I played the chicken chat sting.

42:01Keyzie:Oh. Oh, yeah, man. Here's a bit of Guns. Roses.

42:06Mike Minogue:The Hauraki Big Show. Weekdays from four on Radio Hauraki. Yes, indeed.

42:11Keyzie:The Killers there on the radio. Hodaki Big Show this rather moist Friday afternoon. The time is 5.56.

42:18Mike Minogue:Hey, fellas, from 7pm tonight, the Super Rugby is officially back. Unbelievable. It is. It is unbelievable. Just in time for Valentine's Day.

42:27Keyzie:Yeah. Good. Still haven't connected up a skybox yet, though, fellas.

42:34Mike Minogue:Highlanders taking on the Crusaders tonight, 7, right? So it's a good Southern Derby to start. Yes, very much so. And the commentary, the ACC commentary, will actually be on Radio Hauraki from 7 o 'clock. Same for tomorrow night's game, which is the Blues taking on the Chiefs, the Battle of the Bombays. Yeah, how good. 7pm once again on Radio Hauraki. So if you're working or you're driving somewhere, you want to listen to the game, leave it on Hauraki.

42:54Keyzie:So is this the competition proper? Yeah. So it's literally starting now. It's not a warm-up pre-match.

43:00Mike Minogue:This guy gets it, man.

43:01Keyzie:Okay. You love rugby, eh? I actually did enjoy my rugby a bit last year. I was just thinking about, That's just reminded me of it right this moment. Last year we did Mike Lane versus a coin. Feels like we should be bringing that back. He won in the end, didn't he? He did in the end, but I thought the difference last year was we took whoever he didn't pick. But what we really should be doing is we flip the coin and whoever it picks, it picks. It doesn't get the leftovers, if you know what I mean. So the coin can pick the same team as Lane. No, we did do that. No. It was the opposite. Oh, no, you're right.

43:38Actually, maybe we did. We flipped the coin. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Oh, there you go. There's no way to improve it. It's a perfect set-up.

43:43Mike Minogue:It's perfection. Coming up after six.

43:46Keyzie:Yes, I was just about to say, Keezy. What is it? We've got to give away some meat and some money for a start.

43:51Mike Minogue:100%. And also, we're going to give out some advice too. Meet pattynips69 at gmail.com. If you need advice on anything, do get in touch. Do. The Hauraki Beat Show with Jase, Mike, and Keezy. Tune in weekdays at four on Radio Hodaki.

44:07Keyzie:Welcome back, you massive backbones. Hope your Friday is just going off. You're listening to The Big Show, brought to you by Reburger.

44:15Mike Minogue:Craveworthy street food freshly made with Reburger. Dish, dish, dish, dish, dish, dish, dish. Oh, okay, mate, how are you? Oh, yeah, pretty good, thanks. What are you playing? What are you playing there? It's a new game where you order Reburger. What? Yeah, you just order Reburger because obviously, you know, it's so good. It's handcrafted and they serve, you know, the good times and you can get the good food if you're really good at it as well. So, sorry, so you're playing a video game. Oh, yeah, here you go. See, what's this bit? See, this is the bit where I get the Reburger. Yum, yum, yum, yum, yum, yum.

45:00Mike Minogue:Good work, Pugs. Another successful re-burger sting there.

45:03Keyzie:Ah, the de-doosh is very cute in there, don't you think? It's great. It's a little de-doosh, de-doosh, de-doosh. A little nod to Woody J there. Yeah, very cute.

45:11Mike Minogue:What are you guys having for dinner tonight? No, actually.

45:14Keyzie:I just texted my wife before. We're just going to go and cruise around and see what we end up with. Pig in the city. You're loving it, aren't you, mate? Love it, mate. Love it. I better just get dumplings. Yeah, exactly. No, no. It's our mission to try. Like, we're also going to try once a week to eat something we would normally never, ever consider eating.

45:32Mike Minogue:Right, I can help with that if you want. Like, one of your shoes or, like, some poos on the ground because you'd never consider eating that. Or, like, a brick. You know, your TV remote. You should eat your phone.

45:53Mike Minogue:Good news is my wife's texted me. She's decided what we're having tonight for dinner What are you going with? Lamb And halloumi pita breads She's got her days all wrong That's no good What do you mean? It's Sunday Today's not lamb day No no but I give up National lamb day's Sunday But I'm just like I give up She's a shocker there Dude she's got no respect for lamb day I thought you were having a hot date in the supermarket And you were going to go together and decide Yeah And then you were going to have ice cream and a cone It's all been worked out That's all going to happen But she's just said Hey what if we just do this And I was like okay let's just do that Little G.

46:26And they'll be watching. What are you going to be watching?

46:28Mike Minogue:Probably the Pike River Mind movie, yeah. Yeah. So that's cool. The Hauraki Big Show. Weekdays from four on Radio Hauraki.

46:38Keyzie:Temper trap there on the Radio Hauraki Big Show this Friday evening. Fellas, I'm a little bit worried. I've got a 50th this weekend. 50th birthday celebration of a mate of mine that I first met in 1999. Wow. When I was backpacking a little bit around Australia there. He's from the UK. Jimbo. Ah, he sounds like a mad bastard. You know what he is, man? What? He's a mad bastard. Ah, no. Anyway, he's having his 50th, and he's having it from midday till 8pm. Wow. Okay. He's got a couple of sons. He's got them out of the house for eight hours. When they get home at 8 o 'clock, everyone has to beat it.

47:20Mike Minogue:Right. Right? So she's going to be all on for young and old. There's a bit of a pool party happening. There's oysters on arrival. It's going to be absolutely – we have done a lot of drinking together, and our relationship entirely revolves around drinking, as most relationships seem to. But this year I'm not drinking, or I'm trying not to, and so far so good. So I'm a little bit worried that I'm going to turn up out there and old habits are going to die hard. Yes. Do you know what I mean? I do. And then I'm sort of going to – before I know it, it's going to be 8 p.m., and I'm going to be slurring and stumbling all over the place responsibly but embarrassing myself in front of his very young sons.

47:58Mike Minogue:Do you have any rules this year? Because last year it was international, the rules don't count. What I now know about myself, Kesey, and what I've always known about myself is that one slip will lead to just a nightmare. So last year I think I got to around about this time, it might have been March even, I think it was March, and I had a mate's 50th. That's right. and I thought look this will just be my one thing little blowout and then for the rest of the year it was a shambles right so you're worried about it so well I feel pretty good but at the same time I'm not there yet you know what I mean is this guy good at peer pressure will he be annoyed he will be laying it on really thick yeah yeah really thick should we practice like you know because I can pretend to be him and lay it on and Hoity J as well you could be another guest trying to get Moogie on the piss yeah yeah sure and then you can sort of practice saying no to it yeah I think A workshop in it, isn't it?

48:49Yeah, yeah, yeah.

48:51Mike Minogue:You said it's a pool party. I haven't got any pool party ambience, but I've got like a cafe vibe that'll sort of do that. Yeah, yeah, yeah. His name's Jimbo, and his other mate, Jase, you can be, is Millsy. Millsy. They're both shocking bastards, pommies. So if you could do the English accent. Are they poms? They're English, yeah. If you could do the English accent. And you're old mogie? I'm old mogie, yeah. Okay. Can you do an English accent?

49:15Keyzie:I'm trying to think what kind of English accent. I can only do one. Well, let's just crack into it and see what it sounds like. Okay. So I'll walk through the door, will I? Yeah, yeah, yeah. G'day, Jimbo. Milsie, happy birthday, Jimbo, man. Good to see you.

49:27Mike Minogue:Oh, Mogie. G'day, mate. So great to see you, Gov. Far out. Now the party's started, you know what I mean, Milsie? Old Mogie's here.

49:38Keyzie:Sorry, Keezy's accent's thrown me there.

49:42Mike Minogue:I said I don't know how to do an English accent.

49:44Keyzie:You're right, Gov. Where's your bloody piss, Mogey?

49:48Mike Minogue:Yeah, Mogey, get on the piss, mate.

49:50Keyzie:Get a bear up here, mate. What are you mucking around for? Well, you said on the chat that you guys were supplying all the booze.

49:56Mike Minogue:Yeah, go to the bloody bar tab, mate. Fill your boots. Of course we're supplying the booze. What do you take us for? No.

50:03Keyzie:You see, I'm not buying this.

50:05Mike Minogue:It's not. You don't have to, Jase. It's for Mogey to buy. You're not. You don't have to worry about it.

50:10Keyzie:Well, I can tell by the look in his eyes that he's not convinced that you're Millsy at all.

50:14Mike Minogue:Okay, but look, we have to power through that. Well, you're Millsy, Jase. Oh, am I? That's where you go. And who am I? You're Jimbo. Jimbo? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Okay, but Jase, just remember, this is to help Moggy stay off the piss, all right? So just fight through it. It's really important, okay? Fine. Come on, Moggy. Aren't you going to have a drink with me and old Millsy? Old Jimbo and Millsy. It's getting worse, but okay. Oh, come on then.

50:38Keyzie:Let's go outside and have a durry. What do you say, Moggy?

50:41Mike Minogue:Yeah, Moggy, what do you say, mate? Go on, let's go and have a toy.

50:44Keyzie:Get some piss on us. I've got to be honest, I'm keen as these shit accents are making me thirsty. Let's go.

50:49Mike Minogue:The Hauraki Beat Show with Jase, Mike and Kesey. Tune in weekdays at four on Radio Hauraki.

50:57Keyzie:What's this? A Radio Hauraki bar tab? Yes, indeed. We've had the names on the list all afternoon. Let's give away some meat and some money, fellas. Let's call our winner.

51:10Mike Minogue:That's right. Celebrating the fact that National Lamb Day is this Sunday, the 15th. Raise a chop with your friends and family. We've been giving away meat packs all week, fellas. Yeah, man, it's been great. It's the final one today, and Pugs has randomly chosen James, so let's give him a call. Good stuff, mate.

51:31Mike Minogue:Come on, James. God damn it, James.

51:34Keyzie:Hello? Yeah, g'day, James. It's the fellas from The Big Show. How you going, you mad bastard? Yeah, good, ODJ. Yourself? Yeah, good, thanks, mate. Good. How's the family time?

51:42Mike Minogue:Yeah, good. I'm just in town holding the young one because he doesn't want to sit in his pram, so I'm having quite a stressful time. Yeah, that's classic, mate. And the phone starts ringing a private number. Harold's the little one there. Arlo's two. He's two. You know what he'd love, man? Sucking on a chopped bone. Oh, he would absolutely love that, Mogi. Can I ask you a question, James? How old are you, your mad dog? 30. Yeah, bad man. Oh, yeah, good stuff, mate.

52:07Keyzie:Well, we've got some great news for you, mate, which will be less stressful. Well, you've won yourself a meat pack and$100. How does that sound?

52:14Mike Minogue:Wow, that's amazing. Good stuff. You like that? That's nothing news. Cheers, fellas. Good stuff, man. No worries, James. You hold the line there, mate. I just want to ask James another question, if that's all good. James, how many kids have you got, man? Two. Oh, Keezy's wondering what it's like having kids at your age, because he's just about to pop a sprog himself. Yeah, oh, Keezy, go for it, man. It's awesome. Thanks, mate. Thank you. You know how you like playing your PlayStation? Yeah. Yeah, that's not happening anymore, mate. Oh, great. That sounds great, yeah. And just confirming I'm not about to pop a Sprog, so that's great.

52:49Mike Minogue:But thanks, James. We'll flick you off some cash and some meat shortly, all right? Have a yarn to Pugs. Awesome. Cheers. Good on you, mate. Nagy, can you stop announcing that I'm about to pop a Sprog? I'm sorry. I'm just so excited about it. About what? There's nothing to be excited about.

53:02Keyzie:Actually, you can't have a kid, Kesey, because that'll affect our golf games.

53:07Mike Minogue:Yeah, because we've played heaps recently, eh? Yeah. Oh, wait, no, Jase has been busy moving house.

53:13Keyzie:Yeah, my bad.

53:15Mike Minogue:Fellas, just quickly, man, don't forget that this Sunday is National Lamb Day and make sure you fire up the barbie and raise a chop with your friends and family, eh? I love it.

53:24Keyzie:Sounds good, man.

53:25Mike Minogue:The Hauraki Big Show, weekdays from four on Radio Hauraki.

53:29Keyzie:Beastie boys there on the Radio Hauraki Big Show this moist Friday evening. Let's give out some advice, fellas.

53:40Mike Minogue:MeetPattyNips69 at gmail.com Get in touch with the fellas Almost did it guys, good work It's a real email address meetPattyNips69 at gmail.com and we are starting to run low now fellas Oh you mentioned that on advice questions, yeah so we might have to knock it on the head Yeah good If you don't want it to be knocked on the head meetPattyNips69 at gmail.com Maybe we could start sending emails to other people for some advice. What do you mean? Well, because people are asking us for advice. You get it? And so we can be sitting here and we go, I've had this happen and I'm going to write a letter to somebody else.

54:16Keyzie:Or an email to someone else. Yeah, that's what I mean. And then we can find out what their response is. So let's say, you know, I've got an issue with something that's happening in my back door. And I think who's had heaps of trouble with their back door? Matt Heath. He's constantly got hemorrhoids. So we could write him an email. I thought you meant an actual backdoor. No, no, no. Yeah, okay. Yeah, and then write him an email and then see if we get a response and we can read that out. Sounds good to me, man. Because we don't want this to end. It's been so good.

54:46Mike Minogue:It has been good, but we will have to nip it in the bud there.

54:50Keyzie:It's funny you say backdoor, actually, because I've been having some issues with my backdoor. You see what I'm saying? I used to, I went through a period where I got a lot of hemorrhoids. Yeah. You know what I mean? Yeah, yeah. Painful bastards, man. Were you pushing too hard, man? Because my doctor said to me, there should never be any strain involved. Never. It should be a very simple process. Yes. And if you're having to strain, just come back later. The body will tell you when it's ready, Keezy. I'll tell you the last time I had issues with my back door is when Keezy bought us that massive bag of Doritos.

55:24Keyzie:Oh, yeah. And I'm convinced that Dorito dust, or Bougia dust. Yeah, dust. Or dust from those wasabi pee pods. Clog up my bowels. Okay. It's quite an easy scientific experiment. It really is.

55:39Mike Minogue:Because I was pissed off about that because I bought you guys chips and Jase found a way to make it a bad thing. That I bought the wrong chips and it affected his digestive system.

55:47Keyzie:I didn't want the Doritos to do that to my bowels. No, no. That's just what happened.

55:52Mike Minogue:You haven't once said, yay, Keezy bought us chips. What a great guy. You've said, my bowels are bad because of Keezy. So why don't we buy another bag of those Doritos? Yes. Eat them. And if it happens again, it's definitely the Dorito dust.

56:07Keyzie:I mean, I know it's not scientific, but I was having some real issues.

56:12Mike Minogue:So what? Do we want to get in touch with Matt Hathaway?

56:14Keyzie:I felt like I was crapping out golf balls.

56:19Mike Minogue:Right. And I bet you, because you love golf balls too. And it took ages.

56:25Keyzie:And normally, I'm a very in there, out there kind of guy. It's a minute, two minutes, two wipes, and I'm gone. Yeah. Are you a big water drinker, Jase? Yes. Yeah, good. I think we could possibly send Matt Heath a voice memo, and then he could send us a voice memo back, which is better than an email. It's a bit more radio friendly. Well, do you want to do that now? We could. All right, you ready? Do you want to do it, Jase? Because it's specifically about the bowel. Sure.

56:51Mike Minogue:All right, here we go.

56:51Keyzie:Three, two, one. Yeah, g'day, Matty. It's Hoorijay here from The Big Show. We were in our advice section of the show, and then we realised that we've got some issues ourselves. Me in particular at the moment, I've got some backdoor issues, and Mogi was saying that if anyone knows about backdoor issues, it's Matt Heath. You've got hemorrhoids coming at your arse. Yeah, totally. Well put. I've been having issues with Dorito dust. I've been eating a lot of Doritos, and I'm convinced that the dust or flavouring on Doritos is clogging me up. Do you have any experience of that? Do you think there's any validity to that assumption of mine?

57:29Keyzie:All your boujard dust, all your wasabi peapod dust, any kind of flavouring of dust seems to clog my bowels.

57:36Mike Minogue:So you're asking, does he have any experience with that, any knowledge of what might be causing it and how to possibly treat it? Yes. If you could send us a voice memo back this way, that would be sick. Sweet. Backbone. All right, well, cool. So the segment's... Yeah, I like it. It's growing. It's mature. It's turning into something else. It's evolving. The other thing, thank you, evolving, yes. Because we don't have to limit it to Matty Heath. Of course, we can do this Matty McLean. We've got so many different people that we can call on here. Well, if Matty Heath is really knowledgeable on backdoors, what would Matty McLean be knowledgeable on?

58:11Mike Minogue:I don't know him as well as you do. Hard to say. He's a big fan of Jace, though. Big fan. Big fan of you. He'd love to hear from you, Jace. The Hauraki Big Show. weekdays from four on Radio Hauraki.

58:29Keyzie:Well, there you go, you mad bastards. That's the big show done and dusted for this Friday afternoon and indeed for the week. In the podcast outro today, what's the clip you've got for us, Keezy?

58:39Mike Minogue:This clip is entitled Rip Ass. You don't used to go outside and rip ass near your tomatoes. What do you do now? No, you've got to go in the elevator.

58:49Keyzie:Well, the good thing about the new place is that there's high ceilings. So what, you climb up under the ceiling.

58:58Mike Minogue:So I bought a ladder.

59:00Keyzie:So I go into the room, into my room.

59:04Mike Minogue:Wait, wait, wait. So you bought a ladder and a floating shelf. No, I didn't buy a ladder. And you guys just stood up there. He's installed a floating shelf with a few tomato plants on it, like four metres a year. Gets up there on all fours. So weird, James. You're a shocking bastard.

59:17Keyzie:Yeah, well, I just, you know, if I do a stinker, I don't want other people to have to endure it.

59:23Mike Minogue:Endure. Endure. It's a mix between endure and enjoy. Because when I hear the word endure, I picture, like, people fighting through a snowstorm.

59:31Keyzie:You know what I realised yesterday, actually, when I was walking home and I had my skull candies on? Is that I... Skull for skull candy? That I was wanting to rip ass, but because I couldn't hear anything, I had to look around and make sure there was no one around me so that I could rip arse.

59:50Mike Minogue:Oh, have you got the arse-cancelling headphones?

59:53Keyzie:Yeah, the arse-cancelling. You know what I mean, though? Actually, I've seen. I actually did a fart the other day with this woman walking beside me with my skull candies on, and I thought it was silent, but she gave me a quick look.

1:00:05Mike Minogue:Nah, you know, I've seen your headphones. They are smell-cancelling. So you can literally rip arse and no one will be able to smell it.

1:00:12Keyzie:Well, it's more the noise that I'm worried about, Keezy. Yeah.

1:00:16Mike Minogue:They're noise-cancelling as well. I wish there was some kind of closed-circuit television where you get captured doing that, just thinking you're alone and ripping arse while wearing white skull candies.

1:00:28Keyzie:Actually, to be honest, my daughter's stolen my skull candies. I've got another pair of... They're not as good as my skull candies. It really annoys me. Mogi, what are you up to? Oh, you've got your 50th. I've got the 50th tomorrow there. What else is on this weekend? The Warriors have got a pre-season match against Manly tomorrow afternoon. A little bit of other stuff on. Man, I'm looking forward to this weekend. It's been a bloody week, fellas. It is, man.

1:00:52Mike Minogue:And if you're into your super rugby, it's up next with the ACC commentary. So stick around.

1:00:57Keyzie:Yeah. Good stuff. You take care out there. Check out the Instagram. Check out the podcast. See you next week.