FULL SHOW: That Bloody Beret

9:51Mike Minogue:corporate look. The audience summed up exactly what the look was in the comments section and we're going to read some of those for you now, Pugs, alright? Can I just say this? And I said this to you, Jase. When I had, as you said in the last break, I didn't have the hat on during the day when we all were here. And as soon as I went to the bathroom and I put it on, I thought, I'm going to get effing mowed for this. And you did it anyway. Can I just say that times have changed? Yeah, totally. Yeah, okay. Totally, sure. Let's start going through some of the comments there, man. This is a comment from Tony Lyle.

10:25Mike Minogue:Is Pugs about to protect the British Channel in a biplane in World War One? That's sort of a Biggles reference there, isn't it really? This one from Simon. I will pay anything for the painting Pugs is about to paint.

10:38Keyzie:There was that element of it, wasn't there? I could have seen you with your little paint board there and doing a French landscape.

10:48Mike Minogue:Yeah, thanks, Jase. Andrew says, I love what Call Me Pugs is wearing. Very powerful statement. I don't know what the statement that he thought I was making was. Doesn't matter. It's a compliment. You take it. Sure. Because I tell you, there's not a lot. Ollie says, wishing Pugs all the best for his new job with the French resistance during World War II. Kia kaha, brother. So some support there. That made sense to me. That's really nice. Yes. This comment here, which I don't get, but you guys do, I think Pugs looks like Schultz of Hogan's Heroes. Sergeant Schultz of Hogan's Heroes. there is a striking resemblance this is his catchphrase

11:28Keyzie:oh I see nothing I was not here I did not even get up this morning so that's

11:36Mike Minogue:and if anybody needs a visual reference he's just a fat guy in a military uniform with a mistake

11:43Keyzie:oh my god you're right but hang on his catchphrase which I don't think it actually played there was I know nothing That's right That was exactly right

11:57Mike Minogue:You commented a gif of that didn't you People could know what the reference was Someone commented Paint me like one of your French girls Pugsan That's two for the painter I'll take that Is Pugs off to the navy or something Ahoy Pugsan Says Marco How about this one from Lachlan Okay but Pugsan has that shit on Yes Now you're talking and now you're talking. It feels good. What about this one here from Scott? Check out the angle on Keezy's pissed ears. Which was an interesting point because I think somebody else says, Keezy, you can't lean your head to the side when your ears are on the piss like that.

12:36It makes it worse. And I was like, oh my God, it does.

12:38Mike Minogue:Jeez, old Keezy's wonky ear is really making his head tilt. And then Mike said, can't miss those steamed ears anymore, Keezy. So it turned from Pugs into me for a bit there. The red snapper says, Kim Jong Pug Un. Kim Jong knows how to put that shit on, to be fair. Pugs looks like he is a World War II codebreaker. Codebreaker? That's also a very good call, too. It's complimentary. Yes. Yes. This one here is good, too, from Andy. I love how Pug San looks like some war veteran, but he obviously has a huge dog roll in them pants. Which, of course, if people forget, Pugs is packing heat down low. Hang on, what was that, two years ago?

13:23Mike Minogue:That's what I... When I first started?

13:25Keyzie:I mean, that's what I thought when I saw the pants. I said, well, given how you're built, you kind of have to. You have to have the baggy pants. White leg. And that's why you wear the beret, because you can back it up.

13:35Mike Minogue:Just to take away the attention. Do you think you'll wear it again, man? What, the beret? Yeah. Chucked it in the bin. The Hauraki Big Show with Jace, Mike and Kesey. Tune in weekdays at four on Radio Hauraki.

13:48Keyzie:Yes, indeed. Soundgarden there on the radio. Hodaki Big Show this Monday afternoon. The time is 20 minutes to 5 o 'clock. Let's have some sport chat.

14:09Keyzie:Well, fellas, I guess we start off with the cricket. At Lord's, I was fizzing about this. I was very, very excited. What a great way to sort of spend your weekend too. You know, it's doing other things, but get up in the morning after, you know, they've played the night before, put the replay on. Just have it playing in the background. Love it. Unfortunately, the pitch at Lord's was an absolute shitter. Nonetheless, it was the same for both sides. We were the architects of our own demise. Too many drop catchers, crucial drop catchers, in a low-scoring match that cost us quite a number of runs.

14:51Keyzie:Disappointing, fair to say. Disappointing. A bit of weather interruption, a bit of bad luck with umpires' calls, etc., etc. But we lost by 115 runs at the end of the day, and I think the team themselves will go, fellas, that was our bad. Yeah, that was one of those ones that we generally have a habit of winning, actually, those low-scoring shooters. That was how we won the World Test Championship. Yes. In exactly the same manner, but yeah, I mean, yeah, you're right. In terms of the drop catches and all that sort of stuff, absolutely. But I mean, that's not up to international standard, that pitch.

15:26It was an absolute disgrace.

15:27Keyzie:It was. It was a shocker. Absolute shocker. And I've got to say, I really felt for Ratchin Ravindra. He was having an appalling match. He dropped one in the first innings, got out first ball dark, then dropped an absolute sitter in the second innings. and you could just see on his face, he was like, I don't want to play this game anymore, I'm done. Got a scratchy eight in the second innings. Onwards and upwards, though, hopefully they take the lessons. Also, it didn't help us that Matt Henry wasn't at fault. He had an injury, so he was kind of... Yeah, he was our strike bowler for that. Perfect conditions for him.

15:59That's right, and Duffy's out as well, who was our player of the year last year. So, yeah, hopefully plenty of improving to be done. I'm not sure when the next year starts. It might be maybe Friday, but we'll keep you updated on that because we've got no idea at all.

16:09Keyzie:A bit of rugby action, of course, over the weekend too. Finals time. How about this, fellas? You were talking about this last week, how the final system in rugby, in super rugby, is just stupid. Can I give you a stat? Auckland of the Blues have lost their last four matches and are still in contention. Isn't that crazy? That's just, I mean, what's going on there? But they were, who played who? Let me think now.

16:36Mike Minogue:So the Hurricanes, huge scores, huge scores. 66-12 over the Brumbies so the Hurricanes still the team to beat Crusaders 52-31 over the Blues hiding and then the Chiefs beat the Reds 46-24 and as a result we've got New Zealand derbies both Friday and Saturday this coming weekend, Chiefs Crusaders and Hurricanes Blues. So it's exciting because this weekend's going to be great but you're right, when you lose that many games in a row at the business end of the season They're just trying to drag it out and you feel like you're involved in a competition where TV rights are the only thing that they care about Yes, I agree.

17:09Mike Minogue:Some other big stuff happened over the weekend. Alexander Zverev finally won an Open, the French Open. Right. Which is exciting. Oh, great. Good on him. And Liam Lawson today had his best ever finish in the Monaco Grand Prix. He finished fifth. Fifth is his best ever equal. He's finished fifth before. Just on the test matches, the second test, England versus the Black Cavs will be at the next one. I'll be at the Oval. Not until June 17th. So nine days away. Yeah, good stuff.

17:37Keyzie:Also, the All-Whites played England, which I had no idea about in the soccer. Lost 1-0, which seemed to me... Lost 1-0. Harry Kane scored going into the halftime break, and then England put out an entirely different team for the second half, and it remained at 1-0. Better than losing 4-0 a couple of days before to Haiti, I think it was. Yeah, that was a shocker. It was a shitter.

18:01Mike Minogue:Hey, fellas, good sports chat. Hey, this is how we do it, man. Here's the White Strikes. The Hauraki Big Show. Weekdays from four on Radio Hauraki.

18:11Keyzie:Pixies there on the Radio Hauraki Big Show this Monday afternoon. The time is 11 minutes to five o 'clock. Let's talk TV. What's on the telly with Mike Minogue.

18:27Yeah. Hi, guys. Guys. Hi, Mike. Hello. Hello. I finished off the second season of The Chestnut Man. Oh, yes. The Chestnut Man, they call him Keezy. He's a mad bastard. I don't like that name. The Chestnut Man hyphen, oh no, it would be colon hide and seek. So The Chestnut Man is the name of, I'm going to say Danish, I don't know, there's somewhere over there. And it's the name of a nursery rhyme that they've got. And so this chestnut man would sing this song or do this rhyme and then.

19:02Mike Minogue:They've got some pretty grim nursery rhymes over there. They do, yeah. Those ones are particularly grim. And so the first season was really good. This one is same, different storyline, different kind of psycho. Six episodes. I really enjoyed it. I think it's great. 3.75 buzzies out of a possible five. The storyline is that somebody is going around killing people. I love that. And there's police officers who love each other. Have to find out who's doing it. I love the sound of that.

19:35Keyzie:Do they love each other or are they sexually attracted to each other? Well, look, in the first season they got together, but when we picked things up in this season, at the end of the first season they were together, when we pick it up, they've broken up. He just walked out for no reason. She didn't know what the issue was. But he's back in her life and you can't deny the electricity. And her daughter had a real affection for him, so it really hurt her. And she's glad to have him back. But there's some demons there, Jason. We don't quite know what they are. and he's a complicated man, I'll say that for him.

20:03He's not an alcoholic, but he does have some issues. 3.75 buzzies out of a possible five. That's available there on your Netflix. Definitely worth a watch.

20:11Keyzie:The chestnut man. In terms of viewing, fellas, I've just got a very quick question because I've watched bits and pieces throughout the weekend. But on the old Instagram there, you know, on the reels and so forth, are you guys now getting a message saying, time to stop scrolling? Give yourself a break. No. No. I've never had those before and I'm like, Is it just everyone that you follow messaging you're going? Why am I suddenly getting this message? Because I don't actually scroll that much. I don't know, man. You're welded to it. I cannot wait to find out what this actually is. It feels like an ad for a brick or something like that.

20:45There's one of these ads for something or other. That'll be...

20:48Mike Minogue:I reckon he's accidentally paid for a weird version of Instagram that you pay as you scroll or something.

20:53Keyzie:But it says that, right? But then it won't let me scroll anymore. That's good. I can't scroll anymore.

20:58Mike Minogue:It must be like a thing on your phone that limits screen activity.

21:02Keyzie:Okay, good stuff.

21:04Mike Minogue:Over the weekend, my wife and I sat down and watched the 1995 Blockbuster. Did you sit down and watch it? Apollo 13. Apollo? Apollo 13. Tom Hanks, Ron Howard. We watched it because, obviously, A Beautiful Mind was so good. Yeah. Then we were like, let's watch another Ron Howard based on a true story situation. The issue with Apollo 13 is it's a lot of guys in a confined space and then guys in a control. Slightly less confined. Yeah, yeah. And people talking about stuff. Yeah. Like, yeah, it's hard to explain, but a lot of the movie is people dropping facts and explaining science-y rocket stuff because it's about a space flight that goes wrong.

21:43Mike Minogue:Whereas, yeah, good film, good film. However, someone just texted her here, it lacks atmosphere on 3483. It's good stuff. there was a massive spoiler at the start because I am not aware of how Apollo 13 finishes. I'm not sure if that's the one where the people perished or whether they're saved, et cetera. At the very start, there was a spoiler and it says, based on the novel written by Jim Lovell, who was the main character, who was Tom Hanks. I was like, oh, okay, so he lives then. Oh, it was okay. It was pretty good. I found it boring. It is a bit boring, to be honest. We had to pause it about three or four times to go and make a cup of tea.

22:19Mike Minogue:and make love in that. Oh, there you go. I'll give it like 3.3 buzzies out of 5. It's good acting and all that sort of stuff, but it's just a bit boring. It's no beautiful mind. It's no Chestnut Man. Yeah. It's no Instagram. Yeah. It's no pugs in a beret.

22:38Keyzie:It's Queens of the Stone Age.

22:43Mike Minogue:The Hauraki Big Show with Jace, Mike and Keezy. Tune in weekdays at 4 on Radio Hauraki.

22:49Keyzie:Welcome back, you massive backbones. I hope you survived your Monday okay. You're listening to The Big Show brought to you by ReBurger.

22:57Mike Minogue:And a reminder, ReBurger provides handcrafted burgers, loaded fries and gourmet eats that will change the game. And the winner of the most prey-worthy and freshly made as well street food goes to ReBurger.

23:24They certainly deserve it, fellas. Well earned. The only ones in the category as far as I'm concerned. Yeah, totally.

23:29Mike Minogue:You don't mention that, though.

23:30Keyzie:Totally. In all honesty, and I'll talk about it a little bit later on the show, I wish I had Reeberger this last weekend, but I didn't. And I'm kicking myself. Kicking myself for it. You had another mozza, didn't you? I had an absolute mozza on Friday night, which we'll talk about later.

23:49Mike Minogue:Another reminder, I said this last week, but Reburger at 2.30am while still steamed is amazing. It's because usually all you can get at that time, I didn't realise Reburger was still open in Auckland anyway, you could Uber Eats it. Yes. Usually all you can get is all the junk food. Whereas Reburger when you're steamed is like the best thing you've ever eaten.

24:10Keyzie:It's the best thing even when you're not steamed.

24:13Mike Minogue:Even when you're sober, it's even better, Jase.

24:15Keyzie:Hey, now listen, very exciting news from Mogey. he's going to tell us all about it next but in the meantime, here's the killers.

24:23Mike Minogue:The Hauraki Big Show with Jace, Mike and Keezy. Tune in weekdays at 4 on Radio Hauraki.

24:29Keyzie:Yes indeed, Radiohead there on the Radio Hauraki Big Show this Monday afternoon. The time is 13 minutes past 5 o 'clock. Play the sting, Keezy. I don't have it, man. Oh, for God. I'm sorry, everyone. We talked about this for hours. Oh, here it is. Fellas, I've got a bit of a conundrum and I just want to run it past you and also the listeners out there. Let us know what you think on 3483. That's a text number there, Keezy.

24:52Mike Minogue:Actually, it's a text number, and every text at the end of the show, put them all together. Million dollars. Wow, I was going to say a Reburg voucher. Oh, yeah, even better than a million dollars. Even better than a million dollars? Yeah, man. So, fellas, we've been running this competition with Street Dog. We gave away a couple of these electric bikes, motorbikes, one to the South Island chapter, one to the North Island chapter, and when I was looking at these things, I was thinking, jeez, I wouldn't mind one of these, man. Yeah, they're pretty cool. I wouldn't mind one of these, man. So I went and had a geez over the weekend, took one out for a test ride with my six-year-old daughter on the back there.

25:26And it was good fun, man. I'm keen. I'm keen. Real keen. The trouble is what sort of happened is that at sort of the same time, my mother. Oh, Marge. Is moving into a rest home. So essentially what that means is, well, a retirement village. I better be careful. Yes. retirement village. And so that means downsizing. So she's gifting me a whole lot of stuff that would otherwise have gone into the dump, one of which is an electrical bicycle.

25:57Mike Minogue:Well, wouldn't it be massive because your mum's really tall? It's really tall, yeah. It's like a penny father. But it can be resized for me. It turned up literally today with all of this other stuff. Oh, so she just sent it all to you? Yes. Wow. Yep, sent it all through. And this push bike, it's a step through. You know what I'm saying? You know what that is, Jase? No. That's where they don't have the bar at the top. Now, it used to be called a man's bike. You know, if they had a bar at the top. I got you. Yeah, yeah, yeah. So it's called a step through now. And is that for women who wear long dresses sort of thing, so they can just step through it?

26:30Well, a side saddle, yeah. I don't know. I don't know why that is. I'll look it up. I don't know why they have that. But yeah, it's a step through. But it certainly works for Marge, who's getting on in life, so she wouldn't be able to swing a leg like she used to in the old days. Yeah. Jeez, boy, did she swing a leg. Or your mum. Anyway, where we're sort of at now is I really want this really fancy, cool-looking thing, and my wife is going to say to me, well, you've already got this one, and it's free. Why would we even consider buying something that's expensive like this other thing? That's a good point.

27:00Well, it's not free. And I guess what I would quite like as a man that's, you know, fast approaching his 50th birthday is to not have to commute on something that's an absolute humiliator. So what I've sort of been dealing with is I've been walking to work, which is fine, but I've also been using the lime or the flamingo. I prefer the flamingo because it's New Zealand owned and operated. But a 50-year-old man on a flamingo. Scooter. Going at, yeah, not an actual flamingo. Yeah, you're right, a flamingo scooter. If I was on an actual flamingo, that'd be sick. That'd be way cool.

27:36Mike Minogue:Oh, mate, you're riding a flamingo into work. But they go at about six k's an hour. And when you're doing that in rush hour track, everybody's around. And it's just embarrassing. Yeah. Whereas you're used to looking cool as arriving in the teeter. Oh, that's right. See, that's another thing. You know, people think that that's punishing. So here I am my whole life. And finally, what about something for me? My wife's fine. She's got this really cool electric car. Yes. But what about me? So are you telling me that you're approaching 50 and you're getting a motorbike? Yeah. Yeah. But it's either that But I mean really What's the difference Between that And this electric push bike You know I'm just as close to death One or the other By the way The reason that they have Step through bikes And this is maybe Why your mother had it Effortless mounting Oh effortless mounting Yeah yeah She loves that

28:25Keyzie:I couldn't help but feel When you were describing it That it sort of sounds perfect for me What the step through Yeah the step through I agree You know what I mean

28:33Mike Minogue:I agree It has a basket on the front It does So you can go put your dumplings in there Yeah

28:37Keyzie:Can you imagine me? In the basket with a towel over his head.

28:42Mike Minogue:Cruising around the CBD in your little step through. And Mogi's riding and trying to get away from the police. That's great. Yeah. So anyway, there's going to be an ongoing argument, but it sort of feels like I might risk standing my ground on this one. Yeah, okay. Tell me what my chances. Electric motorbike or electric bicycle? Which one should Mogi get? 3483.

29:07Keyzie:In the meantime, here's System of a Down.

29:10Mike Minogue:The Hauraki Big Show. Weekdays from 4 on Radio Hauraki.

29:14Keyzie:Yes, indeed, Sublime. They're on the Radio Hauraki Big Show this Monday afternoon. The time, 5.23.

29:21Mike Minogue:Fellas, I had a strange encounter of the hoity jay-vra. Bless you, Jase. You're good, man? Yeah. Chicken on a chip. No, it's got a bit of a burn going on. You've also got chips on your hoodie. But anyway, fellas, I had a strange encounter of the hoity jay-kind today. Strange encounters of the hoity car. Now, for those of you that don't know, Jase lives in the city, and you spend a lot of time walking around the city, Jase, and interesting characters seem to gravitate towards you. Yes, very often. But can I say that it's not because he lives in the CBD. This has been happening since time began.

30:01Mike Minogue:Yes. Yeah. A lot, yeah. And the case in point was, a few years ago, we were in Wellington, And an interesting character was walking past all four of us from the big show, including Pugs, looked at Pugs, looked at Mogi, looked at me, and then zeroed in on Jase, walked over to Jase. He had a little trolley with him. And he said to Jase, and the world keeps turning, eh, mate? And then you said, yeah, mate. Yeah, mate. And then we were like, why did he choose you? Anyway, this is what happened to me today. It was a very hoity J moment. Driving from out west in Auckland, you come off the motorway to a set of traffic lights that go down into town, down towards the Hauraki office.

30:38Mike Minogue:And there's always someone there washing windows or asking for money and stuff. Yes. And in fact, I keep a little thing full of$2 coins in my car. And gravel, you see. And gravel. And I use the$2 coins at the vending machine and I use the gravel to give to them. You're right, Mogi. Today, I was in my truckie and the window was down and it was an older woman holding a sign. It said, any spare change. I didn't have it because I wasn't in my car that usually has the gravel in it. So she came around to the window that I was driving at because it's on the other side, and she just goes, what does this say?

31:12Mike Minogue:And she turned her sign around, and on the back it had the word time written there. And I was like, time, do you want to know the time? And then she just said, no, your time has come. She said, I know what you did the other day down by the trees over there. Yeah. And just so you know, everyone knows about it. Yeah. And you're going to get an absolute hiding zone. Yeah. So just letting you know, man. And I was like, oh. Yeah, it's good to know, though. Yeah. And then I said, oh, you sure haven't got me confused with Hoity J? And then she said, oh. Yeah. Yeah.

31:45Keyzie:Because that's a classic Hoity J. Very much so. And you get to understand these things when you're on the street all the time, Keezy. You're right. In the sort of upper and lower sides. Yeah. It's a term of affection. when they come up to you and they say, you know, blah, blah, blah, we're going to smack you in the head. Yeah, because it seemed quite. You go high five, man. Funnily enough, going home on Friday night, a dude walked past me, and I think he was a homeless guy, and he said something to me, and I didn't quite catch it.

32:26Mike Minogue:And this is the mistake he always makes. What was that story, man? Instead of walking on.

32:30Keyzie:I carried on walking about another metre or two. So about 20 paces. And he turned around and he was effing and jeffing at me. And I was like, oh, sorry, man. What did you say? And he said, bro, I went to fist pump. I see you every day. I went to fist pump. You fist pump me. And I went, sorry, brother. And I gave him a bit of a fist pump. And then he smacked me in the head. Fist pump? Yeah, you know. He pumped you with his fist. Yeah, yeah. Oh, a fist bump. No, a fist pump. Yeah, no, that's, Jase, that's a fist bump. Oh, a fist bump. Do you know why that? Because you bump your fist. Yes, because did he pump you with his fist?

33:14Because that's not good.

33:17Mike Minogue:The Hauraki Beat Show with Jase, Mike and Keezy. Tune in weekdays at four on Radio Hauraki. Let's see who's joining Jerry and Manaya on the Export Ultra Grand Final Beer Garden Tour. Oh, yeah, they're doing that, aren't they? Yeah, yeah, they're going to the Grand Final in Sydney, fellas. It's another Export Ultra Beer Garden Tour. Didn't speak to me about it. Are they supposed to? Yes. Jerry, Mania, and ACC head G Lane. They've done a few beer garden tours so far. Paris, Munich, Texas, and now Sydney. Going pretty good. Yeah, man. Whereas if you look at us, it sort of goes magic round, magic round, magic round.

34:02Hokitika, Hokitika. Wellington. Bevana, Bevana, Bevana, Bevana. Oh, we went to Fiji.

34:06Mike Minogue:That was cool. Fiji. That was excellent. That is true.

34:09Keyzie:Yeah, no, we can't complain, but it feels like they've got a better deal going on there. But anyway, an opportunity for you to go in the draw for that.

34:17Mike Minogue:That's right. People might be wondering, oh, what do we get? I tell you what, you get three nights in Sydney, five-star hotel, return flights, races the day before, a harbour cruise, and the grand final experience. Of course, these guys know the rules, know the routine, know how to go deep. Big days, bigger nights, legendary stories. That's what's written there. Really? That sounds awesome, man. Who's keen? Should we go to the lines?

34:38Keyzie:Yeah, let's do it, man. G'day, Luke, you mad bastard. How's life? Oh, g'day, fellas. What's going on? Oh, you know, mate. Chilling, man. Just cruising with the fellas. How was your weekend, Luke? Oh, yeah, pretty dusty today, mate. It's a bit rough, isn't it, when you roll into Monday and you're not really feeling it. To be honest with you, man, what we're looking for are the kind of people that can ruin the holiday for the ACC and the Breakfast Boys. Is that something you think you can do, man? Get absolutely steamed and then just punish them for hours with tales of your conquests over the years?

35:13Mike Minogue:Oh, that sounds right up my alley, mate.

35:16Keyzie:Yeah, that sounds perfect for it, actually.

35:19Mike Minogue:Yeah, we're not looking for them to have a good time. We're looking for you to have a good time and them to have a bad time, all right? so just keep that in mind, all right? You're in the draw.

35:26Keyzie:All right, cheers, fellas. Good on you, mate. G'day, Patrick, you mad bastard. How's life? Yeah, good. Yourself? Yeah, good, thanks, mate. Tell me, Patrick, just like Luke, could you turn this into a nightmare for the ACC head, G-Lane, and Gerry and Manoa? Oh, yeah, could definitely give it a good nudge. Okay, cool.

35:46Mike Minogue:We're going to need you to... Are you okay to responsibly just get steamed way too early and just sort of punish them the whole time?

35:52Keyzie:Yeah, definitely. Not in grand final day, though, but you can do it for the rest of us. Yeah, yeah, okay, okay.

35:58Mike Minogue:Can you be, like, ultra serious on grand final day and just sit next to them? Yeah. If you could do that, Patrick, actually, that would be good, too. Even starting fights with people. Yeah. Yeah, could definitely give it a go.

36:08Keyzie:Actually, could you, for the grand final day, Patrick, could you, while they're watching the game, just go back and forth constantly buying beers so that the guys don't actually get to see the game? Yeah, it depends if the wilds are there, though. Oh, yeah, good point, good point. A guy that commentates the game the whole time, which is also equally as annoying.

36:27Mike Minogue:Yeah, yeah, yeah, that'll be perfect, actually, Patrick. All right, I like the sound of you, mate. You're in the draw, all right? You hold the line. Sweet, cheers. Good on you, mate. We don't want a couple of great winners. We want a couple of people to get in there and just make it as miserable as possible.

36:40Keyzie:We won after, like, the first day, the fellas going, what have we done? That's right, that's right. They think they're going away for a huge, fantastic time and event, but it gets ruined. if the Warriors make the grand final Kesey will you be there?

36:56Mike Minogue:I don't know it's it's one of those things where I don't even want to I don't even want to think about if they're going to be there or not you know what I mean? Yeah but I guess they won't be don't worry about it Mogey you'll be there I'll be there you'll be there with the Albon 100 % I will yep absolutely potentially I probably will be there yeah yeah yeah same same you're right same listen out for your cue to call once again if you hear it again 0800 Hauraki get yourself in the draw In the meantime, here's a bit of rage against the machine.

37:27Mike Minogue:The Hauraki Big Show with Jace, Mike and Keezy. Tune in weekdays at four on Radio Hauraki.

37:33Keyzie:Welcome back, your massive backbones. Hope you are surviving your Monday evening. You're listening to The Big Show, brought to you by Reburg Gear.

37:41Mike Minogue:Craveworthy street food, freshly made with Reburg Gear. Reburg a b****.

37:47Keyzie:I mean, Tony Brown. Brownie. Brownie. On the rugby side of things, bloody great coach. But it's 2028 they're talking about. I don't care. What's the point of bloody... Don't even worry about it, man. It's 2026. Two years away. It's too late there.

38:05Mike Minogue:We've already lost the World Cup. Are you still in a whore of a mood about your Uber Eats on Friday night? A little bit. What's for tea tonight, fellas? Great question. I don't know, but it better be good. You know, what I need in my life is someone like, say, Hoity J to come round and say, look, I'll take care of it, babe. Leave it with me. And then I can have nothing turn up for two hours and then go and get something that really lets me down. Yeah. Yeah. Good times. But no, I don't know what it is, but I hope it's good, man. I do need a good feed tonight. Yeah.

38:37Keyzie:I'm having burgers. Yum, homemade? Yes. You're going to love this, actually.

38:44Mike Minogue:Smash burgers. Are you going to smash them? Yes. From the supermarket? Yes. Yeah, okay. They're pretty good. Yeah. A proper smash burger.

38:52Keyzie:I was actually disgusted when I saw the packet. I mean, you bought smash burgers? Yeah. What have you become, man? I mean, it's all falling apart. Can I just say, on the other side of my debacle on Friday night, found some amazing food joints over the weekend in the town. Were they called Reburger? No, they were not. What are you having, Keezy?

39:13Mike Minogue:What are you having? Butterfly chicken. Again. The third butterfly chicken. I worry for the butterfly chickens that live around your joint. They're getting smashed. Getting slaughtered. Is that a breed of chicken? It's a breed of chicken, a butterfly chicken, yeah. Oh, wow, I didn't know that. I thought it was because they sort of butterflied when they're prepared. They sort of slipped from a elder to mouth or whatever. But, yeah, I love a butterfly chicken. You're having another butterfly chicken, which, to be honest, it's the same as any other kind of chicken. Yeah. Yeah, why are you so obsessed with the butterfly chicken?

39:51Mike Minogue:I don't know. My wife's just really into them at the moment, so I might. Right.

39:54Keyzie:Is it marinated?

39:56Mike Minogue:Garlic and something. Garlic and thyme. It's great because the next day you can make chicken sammies. Oh, of course you can. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

40:04Keyzie:I usually make a chicken soup out of it, but I hear what you're saying. What do you have with the butterfly chicken? You're not just having that on its own.

40:11Mike Minogue:My wife will make a delicious salad. I think she's making like a pumpkin. No. No. Like rockets. No. And a bit of yogurty stuff. No.

40:24Mike Minogue:There's some other stuff in there. There's cranberries and stuff in there. It's delicious.

40:28Keyzie:Actually, just on that, on cranberries, my wife made a delicious chocolate slice the other day, but she ruined it by putting cranberries in it. Ruined it. So you stopped talking to her for three days. Yeah. I packed another sandwich of beer. Yeah, nice. I'd had enough. Here's Arctic monkeys.

40:49Mike Minogue:You guys got such a healthy relationship. The Hauraki Big Show, weekdays from four on Radio Hauraki.

40:57Keyzie:Pool jam there on the Radio Hauraki Big Show this Monday evening. The time is 13 minutes past six o 'clock.

41:04Mike Minogue:Fellas, I've got a bone to pick, man. Have you got a bone to pick? Yeah. I've got a bone to pick. So cool, Jase. Is it food related? Nah. Are you saying you've got a bone to pick or you've got a boner pick? Because I would love it to be the latter. It is. It's the latter. I've got a boner pick and it's in my albums and I don't know whether I should delete it or archive it. Well, send it to me.

41:28Keyzie:And we'll make a decision about it.

41:30Mike Minogue:And we'll make a call on it. Okay, cool. Actually, now that we've dealt with that boner pick, I've got a bone to pick. I got a boner pick. It does sound like that though, doesn't it? It does. So we're in the process of buying a new house, right? And that involves us going to approximately 1 billion open homes every single weekend, which begins as like, it's exciting to begin with and then quickly becomes punishing. Yeah. One thing I've noticed is the difference in real estate agents, right? Now, there are quite a few real estate agents out West where we are who are really lovely, really bubbly, really chatty, really nice, really positive experiences.

42:09Mike Minogue:Whenever we see them, we go, oh, it's blah, blahs listing. that's great, go see them, they're always really good. I've noticed whenever you come into the city and the sort of, you know, the fanciest suburbs where we're going to get way less for our money, the register agents are massively blinged out. They have like Gucci this and you know what I mean? They've got all the huge like designer brands on. Accoutrement. Accoutrement. That's the word I was looking for. Definitely that word. but they have everything from head to foot. It looks like their outfit cost them$10 ,000. Their car parked out front is worth$200 ,000.

42:49Mike Minogue:And then you go into the open home and they literally are the most cold people I've ever met in my life. Well, they can smell poor people, Kesey. Is that what it is? Yeah. They know a poor person when they see one. They're dressed for success, man. They exude success. Yes. And they ain't got time for you to come in you know wearing your hoodie that you bought over at Magic Round I was wearing that hoodie yeah straight away they're just like well this guy goes straight to the bottom of the list if it ends up being you know everyone chucking in a bid because the neighbourhood will be fuming at them yeah why at me coming in yes absolutely dragging down the prices of the houses because what are you coming in with you coming in with your truckie your old truck pretty loud yeah that's right your shitbox motorbike that starts 1 in 10 times You see what I'm saying, though?

43:40You're like the guys out of the castle there. Yes. You're lovely people. You're backbones, but you're better off living out by the airport.

43:52Keyzie:Yeah, right. Is that what it is? You've got Tire Kicker written all over you. And there's the waft of poverty in West Auckland. Do you find that they follow you around? Because if I was a real estate agent and you guys turned up, I'd be terrified that you would be thieving things, you know, the silverware, et cetera, et cetera.

44:14Mike Minogue:Going through drawers. Yeah, the silverware is what I'd go for. Yeah. Oh, okay, maybe that, because I was just like, oh, you know, all these really, like, because my thing was I'd prefer a real estate agent who didn't have a$250 ,000 car pulling up. Because to me, that's just like arrogance. That's right, but I think they're not aiming to have you as a client. They're aiming to have people that are super, super rich who also drive the same sort of car. So what you're attracted to is people that are like you. The ones that you like out west are like you. They're bubbly, they're friendly, they're nice.

44:46They're nice, yeah. The ones that are in the city are trying to attract people that are like them. Right. And so you want people that are cold, a bit snobby, but clearly successful. Yeah, okay. They've got the$300 ,000 car and all the labels and all that sort of stuff so that you think, oh, this person's like me. I'll listen to what they've got to say. Yeah, okay. Is that what it is? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Absolutely. But you're right. Yeah.

45:08Keyzie:A-holes. I mean, when I used to do that too, because I came from out west, I know what you're going through, Keezy. And now I, you know. Now you're in the city. Now I'm in the city. They just flock. They're all over me. Yeah. They call me CBD Jace. They're like, anything you want to know, CBD Jace.

45:27Mike Minogue:So if Big City Jace walked in, who, by the way, wears the same hoodie every day and a boys' trip hat, they would give him the time of day.

45:34Keyzie:Yeah, because I reek of success. Correct, you do.

45:37Mike Minogue:Oh, of success. The Hauraki Big Show with Jase, Mike and Keezy. Tune in weekdays at four on Radio Hauraki.

45:45Keyzie:Weezer there on the Radio Hauraki Big Show this Monday evening. The time is 6.26, and you were just talking about real estate agents, Keezy, that sort of you don't like.

45:57Mike Minogue:Yeah, some of them are great. Some of them I deeply dislike.

46:00Keyzie:Yeah, because they're a little bit cold. and flaunt their wealth. I had a kind of opposite kind of situation occur in the business front myself today. I had to ring the bank, fellas. I haven't rung a bank for a long, long time. And the reason that I had to ring the bank was because I had an old account. And what I needed was to get the statements from that account, which no longer exists online. It's gone because I closed it. but I needed the statements. I'm with you. So I called the bank and this woman answered and I was like, hello.

46:38Mike Minogue:Is that how you started? Yeah.

46:39Keyzie:Hello. And she said, hello. And, you know, how can I help you? So we got talking and I don't know if you guys know this but a lot of people find my voice pretty sexy.

46:57Keyzie:And it was just a vibe I got. that she kind of liked me. Oh, wow. I was sort of cracking a few jokes and stuff. What were you saying? Cracking one, were you? A few jokes and that. What jokes did you say?

47:12Mike Minogue:Like banking jokes?

47:13Keyzie:Yeah, they were financially orientated, Keezy. Now you've got my interest. Yeah.

47:20Mike Minogue:I'd like to make a deposit. Oh, and then withdrawal.

47:24Keyzie:Yeah, I've got your point. Decimal point, that is. Oh, no, that's not good.

47:36Mike Minogue:That's shocked. Anyway. You want to see my what? Oh, my pin. Then things got really inappropriate.

47:47Keyzie:Oh, wow. And I was like, whoa, whoa. Forward much? HR much? She said to me Can I have your phone number? And I was like Wow She asked me your number She asked me my phone number And I was like Excuse me? Can I ask you a question Jase? Sure Did you give it to her? Oh yeah You gave her your number Oh

48:20Mike Minogue:Did you give her your number?

48:22Keyzie:Then Even more

48:24Mike Minogue:I was like, do I just move on?

48:26Keyzie:Even more forward than that. And I was sort of, you know, I was like flustered. I was like, oh, um. Did you at any point say you were married? Well, I didn't feel like I had to at this point, but I was going to get to that.

48:38Mike Minogue:Yeah, right.

48:38Keyzie:She said, can I just have your address? And I was like, oh, okay. Like she wants to come around. Wow. Yeah, and I said, look, I guess so, but I should let you know I'm married. and she was like, oh, it's your wife, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. And I was like, that's right. And she was like, okay. And then she was like, can I get you your email? I'm going to send you something. Did you say it like that? Yeah, she said, can I get your email? I want to send you something. A little something? It was quite a big something. And I was like, oh, I don't know if I can sort of download photos or anything like that on my email.

49:22Mike Minogue:I hope you didn't say that because that's the most boomer statement I've ever heard. You can. It's the best place to do it. Don't download photos on my email? What?

49:39Keyzie:Anyway, the good news was, fellas, I got all the stuff I needed and I'm meeting her at Redragon next Thursday.

49:51Mike Minogue:Oh, good stuff, Hody J. Here's Tom Petty. The Hauraki Big Show. Weekdays from four on Radio Hauraki.

50:01Keyzie:Lincoln Park there on the Radio Hauraki Big Show this Monday evening. The time is 6.38.

50:09Mike Minogue:Hey, fellas, just a quick reminder. Thursday, June 25th from 6 a.m. until 6 p.m. We will be live from the Sky Tower for a day in Lou, raising funds and awareness for bowel cancer in New Zealand. To donate, text Lou to 3483. We'll send you a link and you can donate there, all right?

50:26Keyzie:Hey, fellas, do you feel like giving out some advice? Yeah.

50:30Mike Minogue:Be pretty nips 69 at gmail.com. Get in touch with the fellas. Please do get in touch. With the fellas. Real email address if you need advice on anything and it features on the show, boom, it's 100 % anonymous and you get a prize. This one comes from anonymous, fellas. Yeah. G'day there. Excuse me. G'day there. I need some advice. My partner and I are staying with her parents after a stint abroad whilst we get sorted. They've been great, no rent, no bills, and they've got a real flash pad. They've been extra helpful since I've started my own business and they think I'm broke. Little do they know I've been raking it in these first few months.

51:19Mike Minogue:The question is, do I keep bludging off them until we move out or do I reveal my hand? Cheers, Anonymous.

51:35What have you got there, Jase, man? Any thoughts?

51:39Keyzie:Because I've got thoughts. It's an interesting one, isn't it? do you bleed them dry for as much as you can? Or do you want some respect in your life? Yeah. You know what I mean? Or do you want them to continuously look at you like you're a massive loser? Which is like my wife's parents did with me for nigh on 20 years. It was longer than that. Nigh on 25 years, a quarter of a century. You only started paying for dinners when we were on this show. That's true, man. That's true.

52:11Mike Minogue:Did you ever bludge off them? Yes. Yes. Yeah, right. For 25 years. So you're saying it's a good idea? To bludge off them? Yeah. Yes. Okay.

52:27It's not so much about them looking at you. It's you looking at yourself in the mirror. Tempting, I know, to get free rent. But if you're killing it and you can contribute, you should be contributing. I know people that have done this. This is quite close to my heart, this thing here. Yeah, right. And, yeah, I think it's the lowest of the low, to be completely honest. Not you, Jase. You're different. Yeah, you're sweet. You're a struggling artist. With you, you didn't contribute because you couldn't contribute. Thank you. You had four daughters and no real prospects. No real work. No real work.

53:05No talent. Lots of busy days, et cetera, et cetera. A lot of busy days. That's completely different to, as this guy is, having heaps of money and choosing to keep it quiet.

53:16Mike Minogue:And just coming back from a big stint overseas, so he had money to go overseas. So he's got money, yeah. He's loaded. I mean, look, yeah. I mean, if I was the parents, they obviously don't know, but I'd be trying to break this up. This is that. Yeah, you don't need this as a son-in-law. No, no. He's a son-in-law, isn't it? I assume so, yeah. It's tricky. I mean, look, it's... I think what you're saying is he should not only show his hand, he should also, out of respect, leave the daughter. Leave the daughter. And do that family a favour. Do that family a favour. Just walk into the ocean. I mean, it's one of those things where it's one thing that they're showing you.

53:54What they're doing is they're showing you the – they don't want you there. Let's be clear. They don't want you there, but they're showing you a kindness because you're with their daughter. So they've been so generous to give you their space to take up time after the daughter's already left their house that they could be spending together and join each other's company. So the least you can do is contribute as much money as possible to ensure that they think you're a stand-up person.

54:21Mike Minogue:Yeah, but I think it's past that now, and now the only option is to leave the daughter. Leave the daughter. Do that family a favour. I think so. And just never speak to them again. Maybe some kind of a retreat. You need to go on some kind of a retreat and find yourself. Yeah, probably overseas somewhere with all that money. Oh, Bali? Yeah.

54:37Keyzie:Yeah, Bali would be nice. Listen, the backbone's over there. Thailand?

54:42Mike Minogue:Yeah, Thailand, sure.

54:44Keyzie:Vietnam? Vietnam. You could live for ages over there with very little.

54:48Mike Minogue:Hey, if you need advice slash to be ripped out on the radio, meet pattynips69 at gmail.com, and you'll get a prize just like Anonymous. It's worth it. The Hauraki Big Show. weekdays from four on Radio Hauraki.

55:08Keyzie:Well, there you go, you mad bastards. That's a big show done and dusted for your Monday evening. Hey, Keezy. Hello. What's the podcast outro clip?

55:16Mike Minogue:Good question, Jase. Today's podcast outro, which comes out at 7.30, is entitled Crying Over Burnt Milk. No, she doesn't like it too hot.

55:26Keyzie:No, no. My wife. So she's not like my wife.

55:29Mike Minogue:But you were obviously burning it, though. You were going too hot. You were going too far.

55:32Keyzie:Again, I will clarify, I never burnt milk. But there's a certain temp my coffee has to be. I heard she started calling you Bernie. Oh, Bernie.

55:45Mike Minogue:Weekend at Bernie's. Yes. Far out. Weekend at Bernie's where he doesn't say anything. Bernie Sanders. That's a politician. You were fuming, weren't you, Jase? What are you, Jase? Oh, Bernie. fuming about the burnt milk situation. So you burnt some milk. Who cares? Who cares, man? Let bygones be bygones. There's no use crying. All I would do is just stop talking and wrap the show up. Yeah, silent treatment. If you could. Mogi, what are your plans tonight? I'll go home. I've got a new couch in the house. Nice. New couch. What is it nice? Owl couch? It is a nice couch. Now, it's not an owl. It's come from Marge, my mum.

56:29So we had two matching couches But they're very narrow They're very narrow And I don't like them They face each other It's one of those things Where it's good for people Who come over But nobody ever comes over So what are we doing? Yes So I've got a new Much wider couch Which is good for two people To be able to lie on Three if you need New kid But now it means There's different couches in there So I set it all up at home And when I go home I'm going to find out What my wife thinks about it Yes Whether she approves or not That's right And that's going to have A major effect on how the rest of my evening goes.

57:00Keyzie:Yeah, okay, I'm hearing you.

57:01Mike Minogue:Keezy, butterfly chicken. Butterfly chicken. I'll probably watch some sort of TV show with my wife. Actually, I'm hosting, I take over as the host of Game of Two Harbs from tomorrow onwards. Yeah. Get an early night, man. Yeah, I've got to go over the scripts and stuff. Can I just say no beers for you, man? Because I'm worried about, you know, a bit nasally.

57:23Keyzie:You're sounding a bit nasally. He had four beers last night, Jase. Did he? Five.

57:26Mike Minogue:Five beers last night. And now look what's happening. The next day, I always get a runny nose. It's just what happens. It's really annoying. I don't know what causes it. Maybe I should have an antihistamine the next day. I don't know. Yeah. Maybe that'll fix it. It's annoying. Jase. For you, I mean. It is annoying. Jase. Yes, Geezy. What are you up to tonight?

57:43Keyzie:I'm going to go home, make my wife a burnt coffee. Stop around the house. Have a few cupboards. Have a smash burger.

57:51Mike Minogue:Order some Uber Eats. It won't show up. F and Jeff.

57:54Keyzie:Yeah. And flirt with a bank teller. Yeah, boy.

57:58Mike Minogue:Hey, we'll see you tomorrow at four.

57:59Keyzie:Yeah, okay. Bye.