FULL SHOW: The Housewarming

13:02Keyzie:I'm really excited about this. How good. This is so good. Man. The Hauraki Big Show with Jace, Mike and Kesey. Tune in weekdays at four on Radio Hauraki. The Red Heart. Chilli Peppers here on the Radio Hauraki Big Show this glorious Monday afternoon. The time is exactly 4.41. Fellas, it's time for a brand new segment. It's important to stay topical. It's important to keep people up to date. That is what we are here to do on radio. And with that in mind, here is my segment. What's happening in old Italy at the old Winter Olympics there with me, Kesey? Ciao, Bella. Arriva, Dutch. Arriva, arriva, on the day.

13:47Sorry about the stigma. This is a brand new segment, fellas. And as I say, you know, we are on the radio. People can't turn to us for up-to-date information. The Winter Olympics are on right now.

13:59Keyzie:You're joking. And we will be keeping people abreast. Are you serious? Of what's happening over there. What do you mean? Am I serious? Yes. What do you mean? The Winter Olympics are on now. They're on right now. Did you not know that, Jase?

14:13Jase:What did you think was happening when we were doing those voices?

14:16Keyzie:To be honest with you, fellas, I wasn't really paying attention. I was just, you know, moving my mouth. Yeah. And going, I don't even know why I said that, actually.

14:25Jase:And I just want people to know that the reason why I said Riva Riva Andere Andere is because Spain also participate in the Olympics. Okay. Yeah. Why didn't you do any of the other nations? We ran out of time. That's the thing. To be sure, to be sure. So, yeah, this segment's going to keep everyone up to date with what's happening at the Winter Olympics. And, you know, it's been going for a few days now, Jase. Has it? Where is it? I'll be completely honest with you. I was sitting down at home there doing I don't know what, and then I'm looking at my phone properly and then it must have come up in my feed that the Winter Olympics were on.

15:00Jase:I had zero idea that it was happening. None that it was coming or that it was on at all.

15:07Keyzie:I had a faint glimmering in the back of my brain that it might be on, but not really.

15:12Jase:No, no, I think that's a tumour.

15:15Keyzie:Hey, Keezy, where can we watch the Winter Olympics? I don't know, probably Sky.

15:22Jase:Yeah, I think Sky. And, yeah, because we went to put it on because I thought, you know what? This is the sort of thing that inspires the generation. I'm going to put this on for Mogi Minogi. Yes. But, of course, it's behind a paywall, so she doesn't get to watch that shit. Well, surely her dad, who's doing very well, would subscribe. No. I wait for the – there's nothing on it, man. It's just the Winter Olympics. T20 World Cup's on, apparently. I suppose that's on there. Is it? You're joking. I know.

15:48Keyzie:I'm having issues with my sky box at the moment.

15:52Jase:It's not plugged in. Did you plug it into the wall? Yeah, well. You're going to extensionally going back to your house. Yeah, I'm going to have to look into that, actually. Hey, fellas. Yes? So the reason I invented this segment. Did you invent it? What is it again? What do you mean?

16:07Keyzie:Did you invent the Winter Olympics, Keezy? I didn't invent the Winter Olympics. I invented this segment, and I'm playing this thing again. We're going to start from the top, and I'm going to tell you what's happening at the Winter Olympics. Here we go. What's happening in old Italy at the old Winter Olympics there with me, Keezy? Ciao, Bella. Arriba, bitch! Arriba, riba, on the red! So obviously it must be winter over there, obviously. It's weird, eh? Because down here, apparently, summer. It always freaks me out how that works. So do they get snow in Italy? Because I've never been there. I know you fellas have.

16:43Keyzie:I simply must at some point. They get snow in Italy, yes. Oh, they do? Mostly on the mountains. On the mountains, yeah. Oh, okay, on the mountains. For example, the Winter Olympics, mate, are in Milano Cortina. Oh, Cortina. Blue Cortina. Not a Ford Cortina. Blue Cortina. Anyway, the point of this segment is to keep everyone abreast of what's happening for New Zealand. Can you stop saying abreast?

17:06Jase:And I will say that, Kesey, the only thing people care about is how New Zealand is going. They don't care about anything else. So how are we going? Nothing to report. We're not competing. We're not in it at all. Well, no, we are. I mean, you know, we had a few of the blokes in the Big Air final didn't really deliver as much as they'd want to. A few also have been, you know, got through to the finals, so no medals of yet. Oh, I did see one lady fell down the hill. Who was that? Oh, that was the, what was that, the legend of the bloody, what was her name again? I don't know, man. This is your segment.

17:36What's your name again, Jase? Who? The lady that fell down the old thing there that Moggy's asked me on the spot. Jill. Was that Jill? It was all Jill.

17:45Keyzie:Actually, Puck San, can you make us a Winter Olympics medal table sting? No, hang on. This is what this segment is for. Oh, you don't want to sting for that? Separate from the... There's literally what? From the initial sting? Two stings, Jase? Are you serious? Yeah, so anyway, I hope you guys enjoyed my segment. That was really good. Thanks, fellas.

18:05Jase:We're going to get back again tomorrow? Yeah, yeah. Every day while the Winter Olympics are on. Obviously, other than Saturday and Sunday.

18:14Keyzie:Here's LMNOP Don't wrap it up, just like that The Hauraki Big Show Weekdays from 4 on Radio Hauraki Kings of Leon there on the Radio Hauraki Big Show This Monday afternoon The time is 4.52 Let's talk TV What's on the telly With Mike Minogue

18:38Jase:Yes G'day fellas Hey, last night on Netflix I watched The Rip. The Rip. Okay. Starring Matt Damon and Ben Affleck. Ben Affleck. And they're a couple of coppers. Oh, is that the new one where they get a cut of the profits or whatever? Yes, that's right. That's the one that Jase watched last week. How many buzzies out of five did you give it, Jase? Two buzzies, I think. I think two buzzies, yeah. So it's a lot smaller scale than I was anticipating. It's pretty much one location. There's some dirty cops around Keezy. You're joking. And a cartel has hidden some money in a house. They go into the house to recover it more than they were expecting.

19:18Jase:And, you know, are some of the cops, one of the cops, all of the cops trying to steal this money? And is anybody safe? And, Jase, would this be a fair question? Can anybody be trusted? Is anybody who they appear to be?

19:32Keyzie:There were suspicions all over the place. All over the shop.

19:36Jase:It was dense with paranoia, Kesey. It really was. And it's garbage, but it's perfectly, I would give it two and a half, I think, James. Okay, no fear. Except for the fact that what really ruined it for me was towards the end, they went and sat on the beach and looked at a sunset, and that just about knocked all the buzzies off. It was nearly a zero buzzy just for that. But what I did like about it was that they've created a new production company where all of the crew get a cut of the back end. Right. So if it goes well, normally what happens is if you're a crew member, you work on a film, you get paid, that's it.

20:12Jase:But there is a percentage of back end if the film is in profit. Generally, that money goes to the producer, the investors, and certain key cast. But it would never go to the gaffer, the lighting guys, the grips, or any of those sorts of people. They've done it so that when it hits certain targets, money would be paid out to the crew, which is bloody good. And they're going to continue doing that moving forward. first time that Netflix has ever done that. That is great. Just letting you know that when you said gaffer, I pictured a roll of tape. And when you said grips, I pictured some handlebar grips on a bicycle.

20:45Jase:That's good stuff. Yeah, great stuff, easy. So I don't actually know what those things are. A gaffer is the head of the lighting team. Okay. And he works with the director of photography. And the grip is the person in charge of making sure that the camera moves safely. Right, okay. So it might be on tracks or whatever it might be. But yeah, backbones.

21:02Keyzie:Fellas, I've got nothing to offer on the TV front. Once I've moved into an apartment, we couldn't get our TV working. All right, well, I'll go then. It's a smart TV. Yeah, I'll go. It's been a debacle. Smarter than you. It's been an absolute debacle. It's probably been outsmarted by a TV. Yeah, totally. Because you've got a smart TV and a dumb human, and they don't really interface well. They don't. You need a connecting cord for them. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Where do you plug that in, Jase? Well, good point. That's what we've been trying to figure out. It's an upgrade to a human. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You didn't use software update.

21:32So my wife and I are currently watching. It comes out once a week and it's on TVNZ Plus, the Amazing Race Australia Celebrity Edition. We're really enjoying it. It's great. They travel the world, blah, blah, blah. Recommend. They've got a duo of Brendan Favola, former AFL player, and his 18-year-old daughter. Great duo, right? Really good watching. He's super well-known over in Aussie, and he's one of the core casting, I think. He's one of the ones. And my wife and I have this theory, because every now and then you get to the end of the episode and it's like you were the last to arrive, you are eliminated.

22:03And we had this theory like, I don't think, because they were coming last, and we were like, there's no way they're going to eliminate those two. They're way too important. Right. And it was the first non-elimination challenge. Yeah. And we were kind of like, I wonder, having worked in TV for a while, I was like, I reckon they make the call on the fly and go, oh, no, we can't lose old Fev and his daughter.

22:25Jase:Yeah. I don't reckon, make this one a non-elimination. Then Bo, the host, just goes, okay, sweet, and then goes, hey, fortunately for you, this is a non-elimination. Right. Whereas if it was some unknown or lesser talent, people that weren't as good at speaking, I reckon they would have been eliminated. Gone burger. But I have no idea. I would say that's probably true. Yeah. Because it's not like it's ruled by honour, is it? It's ruled by ratings. That's right. And you can't get rid of all the interesting people and be left with the dullards. And that was the thing. I was like, oh, man, I hope they don't get eliminated because I want these people to get eliminated because they aren't contributing much.

22:55Yes. That was my theory. We Googled it. It was like, no, no, trust us. Rest assured, it's legit. Oh, yeah. And I came away from that being like, no, that's not true. Great stuff. But who knows, fellas?

23:05Keyzie:Great stuff. How many buzzies, Keezy? I give Amazing Race Australia for reality TV 3.8 buzzies out of five. Not bad. Not bad. Pretty good. Hey, coming up after five, I need to chat to you fellas about my housewarming. Yeah, absolutely. Just sort it out. Pumped. What you want, what you need, all that sort of stuff. That's after five. The Hauraki Big Show with Jace, Mike and Keezy. Tune in weekdays at four on Radio Hauraki. Welcome back, you massive backbones. Hope you're surviving your Monday afternoon. You are, in fact, listening to The Big Show, brought to you by Ree Burger. And crafted burgers, loaded fries and gourmet eats that will change the game.

23:47Yum.

23:48Keyzie:Just on that front, by the way, fellas, any new stings from Pugsun on the Ree Burger front? Let me just have a look here.

23:58Keyzie:Okay. Disappointing. Nothing as per. I don't think we've had a new one for about three weeks. Yeah, it's been a while, eh? Yeah. Yeah, yeah. Oh, oh, oh. Oh, hang on. Sorry, he's just said here that he's made one. Do you want to hear it? Yes. Oh, yeah. All right, here it is.

24:15Scrum Diddly Uptious.

24:17Jase:What do we think? I don't know. I feel like I've heard that one before. Yeah. I mean, that's a repeat there, Kenzie. Is it? Come on, man. Oh, okay. What about this one?

24:31Jase:That's good.

24:32Keyzie:You asked for it. See how happy it makes us pugs? Yeah, man. It's made my day, pugs. It really has. Thank you for that, man. Literally doing your job probably made Jase's day. Isn't that amazing? Yeah, yeah, exactly. So good. Hey, now listen, fellas. I want to talk to you a little bit later on, maybe up next. About your shirt. About, well, yeah, we've talked about the shirt many times. Which one is this one? It's sort of like a water lily thing. Yes. Yes. There's a bird in there somewhere. I'm sure there is. Anyway. But I want to talk about, because I'm really excited about this, getting you fellas over for dinner.

25:07Oh.

25:07Keyzie:Just what your sort of expectations are, et cetera, et cetera. But in the meantime, here's the Arctic Monkeys. The Hauraki Big Show with Jace, Mike and Kesey. Tune in weekdays at four on Radio Hauraki. Foo Fighters there on the Radio Hauraki Big Show this Monday afternoon. The time is 11 minutes past five o 'clock. And as the people probably know, by now I moved over the last week into an apartment in town. Very exciting it is too. Must have walked over 30K, my wife and I, just cruising around the place. Last night was, in fact, the first night we cooked something in the actual apartment. We've been there for five nights.

25:44Keyzie:Was the stove kind of like the TV? You couldn't work it out? Actually, it's a very fancy stove. And there's been some top celebrity chefs that have lived in this particular apartment. So she's a big gas bastard with all sorts of stuff going on. It took us a while to figure out how to turn it on.

26:01Jase:How many things can there be going on? You've got to turn the dial and push it down? Is it one of those ones?

26:06Keyzie:Yeah, but it didn't do that. It wouldn't work, Mo. It wouldn't ignite. But there's a little switch on the inside cupboard that you have to push down, which we didn't know about. But anyway. Oven chat. Sorry, Jase, before you do get underway here, is this like Life in the Big City chat? I guess so.

26:25Keyzie:with Hoody J. With Hoody J. Yeah. Now, obviously, I feel terrible, fellas. I haven't had you over to my place for dinner yet. So I'm thinking of having a nice...

26:34Jase:You didn't know how to use the oven.

26:35Keyzie:I'm thinking of having a really nice housewarming at my apartment and inviting you fellas over. Jase, I don't want to hear it. You said you were going to do that at your old house. You didn't do it. And then you said before we went away for Christmas that you were going to have... Before we came back on air, that we'd have like a meet-up at your mother-in-law's place or something like that. Yeah, up north there. Up north. Yeah. I put it in my calendar. That day went by, nothing from you. Okay, well, let's just can it then. No. Yeah, I'm keen on that. Canning it. No, hang on. Obviously, I want to come over to your house.

27:05This is the issue, is that we all want to come to your house.

27:07Keyzie:Well, I'm thinking within the next – there's a few things we need to get. We've got about 50 pictures to hang up. It's a bit of a nightmare scenario. Actually, I might get your wife over for that, Moggy. She's very good with the artwork, isn't she? She'll end them up against the wall. That's what they're doing currently.

27:22Jase:Well, no, I mean, what I did was I got a man in. Oh, right. And I just put them up, had them put up by him. Okay. Because I knew otherwise they'd just sit on the floor. Good stuff. No, her fault. Our fault.

27:32Keyzie:Well, I'm thinking of having you over for a nice dinner and your partners, of course. I've already pre-ordered some pork mints. Right, you don't need a perfect, okay, two things. We don't need pork mints. Well, yes, we do. You're coming, Keezy. It's a special occasion, Keezy. I want you to feel special, man. No, hang on, no, but like. So I'm thinking like a big bowl of pork mints for Keezy? Yep. I just need to just quickly, I don't have to eat only pork mitts.

27:55Jase:Can I have some like boujard or peanuts or something?

27:58Keyzie:Well, this is the thing that I was wanting to ask you about actually, Mogi, because I'm not sure anything special, you know, any requirements. I've obviously got a couple of tubs of tofu for pugs. Yeah. I'm not going to cook it, but I've got a couple of tubs. Another thing, just while it's on my mind, you don't have to pre-order pork mitts. Well, this is premium pork mitts, not your cheap supermarket stuff. It's pre-ordered, so the pig currently is alive and has no idea. Correct. it's going to be slaughtered on the day that they mince it and you come over. Oh, yum. Anything else, fellas? Is there any, I mean, drinks, obviously, Mogi, you don't require anything.

28:30Jase:I'm on the wagon, so I'll just have a nice cup of tea. And actually, I'll have one of your famous coffees, if that's all good, man. I might have a nice coffee. An espresso after dinner. Well, I'm running a stovetop at the moment,

28:39Keyzie:if you don't mind. I'll have an espresso, so if you can sort that out. Okay, yes. Keezy, you can bring your own piss. I'm not paying for you. Any sort of, any allergies or anything like that that I need to be aware of? Shit chat. Shit chat. Oh, like at the actual event? Yeah, yeah.

28:55Jase:When you turn up somewhere and it's like shit chat, it's like, oh man, I've got to go to the toilet. I just, I feel, yeah, I just have to get out of there. Well, you might have to take a couple of antihistamines because it is Hoity J's house.

29:05Keyzie:Well, the good news is there's a couple of toilets. What about music? What kind of ambiance do we want to run here, fellas? We want it funky and fun. We want it chill, sort of relaxed. What's the vibe that I'm going for? I reckon we just sort of put on the Hodaaki Nitro. Yeah. Yeah, but I'm wanting it to be a good evening. I'm wanting it to be fun. You say that the Hodaaki Nitro is not fun. Yes. Okay. How about this? How about this, right? How about this? Hear me out. Why don't we set it up as a competition that listeners can come to as well? That's a good idea. I'm not being stupid here, Jay.

29:41I'm not taking the piss here. but just maybe a couple of pairs of friends can have a dinner party at Hoardy J's with the fellas for the big Hoardy J flatwarming. And like you say, you text in on 3483 who you'd like to bring and what you could bring too to add to the party vibe. Yes, okay. And then maybe we could pick like three duos to come along.

30:00Keyzie:Yeah, winners in like July or something like that.

30:02Jase:It's a good idea because, Jase, when is the last time you had a dinner party? A long time ago. That's right. I'm worried that I'm going to turn up, you're completely out of practice and it's going to be terrible. I think you should get some listeners along for a few times and then once you've sort of got the run of how things should go, then I'll be willing to come over. But I don't want you practising on me. 3483, would you like to come? What will you offer? Let us know every text in the drawer for a$50 rebug about you. Okay, so it's a competition now, is it? The Hauraki Big Show. Weekdays from four on Radio Hauraki.

30:36Keyzie:Blind Melon there on the Radio Hauraki Big Show this Monday afternoon. and the time is 23 minutes past 5 o 'clock. We're talking me having a housewarming party for the fellows. That's right, your new apartment in the city, Jay.

30:51Keyzie:With Hoity Jay. We've discussed food. Also, you guys don't want sort of cheeses and crackers and sort of breads and dips before we start the main meal, do you? Yes, please.

31:01Jase:Yeah, 100%. Lots of different cheeses. I mean, I won't eat them, but I just like seeing them.

31:06Keyzie:It's just, yeah, this is the thing. Because you buy a platter of cheeses and cold meats. A pre-prepared platter. Well, no, you don't buy the platter. You buy all the cheeses and the meats and your pickles, et cetera. Then no one eats it and you've got like 10 blocks of cheese and meats in your fridge.

31:21Jase:They're toasting, though.

31:22Keyzie:Yeah, I suppose so. Listen, I know this is, I just want it to be a very special night, so I thought we could maybe make a bit of an effort on the clothing front, maybe make it quite formal. I'm not talking ball gowns, but I'm talking, I want you all to make an effort, maybe some nice casual sort of suits, sort of looks. Well, why don't we say smart casual? Yeah, smart casual. You guys will deal with that. It's sort of the stuff that Mogi's gone out and bought recently. So you've got nice stuff, a nice button-up shirt. You're already there, Mogi. Okay. Some slacks. Just maybe don't wear the sandals.

31:53Yeah, definitely not the sandals. Sandals off. Yeah. I'll write here, smart casual. And don't forget 3483. Text in what you'd potentially bring to the Hoardy J Housewarming. And what did we agree on? Was it five duos can come along for the official Hoardy J Housewarming? Yes. So 3483, get stuck in there. Every text in the drawer for a$50 Reburger voucher and some good stuff coming through. For example, Oren down there in Christchurch. Who? Has already named your house. Have you heard of the word, the Wiz Palace? Need to go to the Wiz Palace. Have you heard of that before?

32:25Keyzie:I think I have actually. Now imagine that fused with this. Jizz. Wiz and Jizz. No, the Jizz Palace. Come on, man. Oh, right. Wiz and Jizz. Come on, man. So the apartment is now known as the Jizz Palace. Is it Wiz Palace or Jizz Palace? Jizz. Jizz. Oh, good. Because that's your nickname. My wife will love that. Someone here has offered to bring their cat to play with Jizz, your cat. Actually, that's a really fair point. She's not having a good time. Is she not? She's lonely. She's lonely. How is she lonely? Well, she doesn't get to go outside and catch skinks and stuff. Oh. She's not an outside cat anymore.

33:05Keyzie:Not lonely, heartbroken. Yeah, heartbroken, yeah. Do you take her for a walk on a leash? Well, my daughter's actually contemplating that, and I said, you are not taking your cat for a walk.

33:13Jase:You've got to do it. We're doing that at the moment for hours because it hasn't had its shots, you see, so you've got to take it out on a lead. They love it, man. It's better than being stuck inside all day.

33:22Keyzie:Okay.

33:22Jase:I know, it's embarrassing, though. Yeah, really embarrassing. People think you're mad. Yes. What about this one from John? G'day, fellas. John from Fielding, keen to come to Jace's big bash with my mate Ben. What we can bring is an effing good attitude.

33:35Keyzie:Yeah, right. Yeah, okay. Well, that might make you feel more relaxed, Mogey. knowing that there's other backbones there and not my painful small talk. He sounds like a liar, though, I'll be honest with you. Yeah, true. Dinner at Hoity J. Dana wants to bring her husband's natural wit and charm. I like the sound of that. Oh, yeah, I like a bit of charm. Yes, okay, yeah, good. Anyone, by the way, just a side note, anyone mentioning Keezy's Meat Patty Nips automatically disqualified? Someone here wants to bring some nose, Kai. What's that? Yeah, right. Oh, okay, I think I've got the gist of that. That sounds good.

34:05Keyzie:Oh, that's a party. You've got to be careful about the timing of that.

34:09Jase:That can ruin a meal.

34:10Keyzie:Yeah, no, true. I still don't even know what it is. I'll tell you off here. Okay. KZ, I was wondering too if perhaps your wife could be in charge of desserts. Yeah, man, what do you want her to make? Like a couple of cakes. Oh, yeah? Maybe, Mogey, you guys could bring a few salads. Oh, no. Robbie says, here, I'd love to come, Jase. I'll bring Brandy Snaps, some rubber bands, and a Celine Dion record. That sounds like a good night. It sounds like... But look, 3483 people are very, very, very, very keen to be a part of this.

34:47Jase:Now, there's a good idea here, Kesey. I don't know if you're saving this one, but somebody here that says they've got absolutely no interest in coming along whatsoever, which I agree with. I'm sort of on their side. But requesting that it be live streamed.

35:01Keyzie:We should, eh? Yeah. We should. Jase, you've only just figured out how to make the TV in the oven work, let alone hooking up a live stream. Well, I'll get Pugs. I wanted Pugs to come over in the weekend, actually, but he turned me down. Yeah, yeah. Well, look, 3483, keep the text coming. Are you interested? What will you bring? And we will be drawing, I guess, those names. In July? What? No, tomorrow for Flatwarming this weekend. Can't wait. The Hauraki Big Show with Jase, Mike and Kesey. Tune in weekdays at four on Radio Hauraki. Smashing pumpkins there on the radio. Hodaki Big Show this Monday afternoon.

35:35Keyzie:The time is 5.36. Now, did I hear the Rebeer gear sting there, Keezy? Who wants Rebeer gear?

35:46Yeah. You certainly did, Jase. If you hear this. Yum. Play at any point during a song here on Hodaki, you give us a call straight away on 0800 Hodaki and you can win yourself a$50 Rebeerger voucher, which is exactly what Chris did.

36:00Keyzie:Yes. G'day, Chris, you mad bastard. How's life? Not too bad. How are you going to make it? Yeah, good, thanks, mate. Good long weekend there, Chris. Beautiful long weekend. Headed up to the Hawke's Bay. What are you going to get? Heading home, got my boy in the back. He's after the three burger.

36:16Jase:What's that little backbone's name?

36:19Keyzie:What's your backbone name? It's Harvey. Harvey.

36:23Jase:What do you do for a crust, Harvey? He goes to school. Oh, yeah.

36:29Keyzie:Hey, tell me, Mogi was talking earlier in the show there, Chris. His daughter's gone back to school today. When did Harvey go back? He went back. He's at private schools. He went back a couple of weeks ago, so we've been kid-free for a wee while. Hey, I was in a bad school. Right, okay. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You were saying off-air, Chris, that Harvey's a bit of a pain in the arse over the holidays. He's a wonderful little man. All right, change the change. Come on, man. Hey, all right, let's get to the questionnaire just to make sure that you're legit there, Chris. Yeah, so just checking your not AI, man.

37:02Question, Chris, what do you do for a crust? I work as an IT architect.

37:08Jase:Oh, here he is. An IT architect. Well, you actually need, Jase needs to talk to someone like you. Do you know how to make a TV work?

37:17Keyzie:We'll see you at the flat warming, Jase. Yeah, yeah, sweet, man, sweet. I want everyone to know I've got it working now. It took me five minutes. Good for you, Jase. Chris, another question here, man. What's for tea? Tonight we're having some barbecue sausages. Just make you a bit of lamb. Oh, yeah, how good. How good. Chris from Wellington, how often do you floss? Yeah. Okay, yeah, good. Yeah, good, good. It's never, but Harvey's listening. He doesn't want to say it. What color are your undies there, Chris? I'll check. Give us a second.

37:55Jase:Don't take your eyes off the road, man. No, they're red. Red. Yeah, nice. Like a fire engine. Yeah, just like a fire engine, Mogi. Good work, man.

38:05Keyzie:Didn't you used to have some fire engine undies, Keezy? Yeah, I had fire engine undies. A little hose on the front there. Yeah, I had a hose on the front. I had a hydrant on the front there. Final question there, Chris from Wellington. What's your deepest fear, mate? Deepest fear is missing my turn off and having to go the long way home. Oh, yeah. Good call, man. Good call. Well, good on you, Chris. You're back, man. You stay on the line and I'll pugs out in Studio B. will sort you out with that voucher, all right? My bad, cheers, guys. Good on you, Harvey. Good on you, Harvey. Good work, mate.

38:37Keyzie:There's nothing worse missing a turn-off, is there, when you're on the motorway? It's like, nah. Yeah. It can be a real nightmare sometimes, having to backtrack around again. I don't think I've ever done it.

38:47Jase:I have. I think I've done it fairly recently as well. I was either listening or running my yap, something like that. Can't remember which one it was.

38:54Keyzie:Tell you the last time I did it, it was when we had our golf day out at... Windross? Windross, yeah. and it happened so quickly and I went, oh, bugger, I wasn't concentrating. Had to take all the way into town and then out west. That's right, I remember that. That was a nightmare. Actually, did you do it recently? Did you miss a turn off recently with your wife? Because I was talking to you the other day, she was saying something about you being a massive turn off or something. Was that what she was talking about? Come on, Casey. What? It's a genuine question. When did she say that to you? Oh, on the phone, she called me in tears.

39:25Oh, did she? Yeah, yeah, yeah.

39:27Keyzie:It was ACDC. The Hauraki Big Show. Weekdays from four on Radio Hauraki. The Black Keys there on the Radio Hauraki Big Show this Monday afternoon. The time is 5.47 and we have old Pugsan in the studio with us. Ooh, it's Pugsan.

39:45Jase:G'day, fellas. How are you? It's quite funny, isn't it? Like making your own sting. It was very self-absorbed. The worst part was no one asked you to do it. No. Oh, no, no. You should have got Jase to do it. No.

39:56Keyzie:Well, the worst part of it is, actually, is that all the other stings have fallen by the wayside because you're spending all your time making Pugsun stings. Ooh, it's Pugsun. June. He likes me to play it more than once, too. Yeah, yeah. I'm signalling to Katie to run it a couple more times. Hey, fellas. Hey, guys, listen. The reason we've got Pugsun is because on Thursday last week, Laneway, which is a giant music festival, was on in Auckland. Now, fully coming clean, it was probably pretty obvious, Pugs and Dilly, our social media chap Dylan and James otherwise known as they were basically they convinced the manager here like hey can we go along to Laneway we'll take sort of media passes or something and we will by going to this festival we will document it we will put lots of social media up and it will justify us not being here for the day and I think it's great you know like sure absolutely you know if you're going to go out there and make it sing on social media they're on Aurohaki you know online then I think it's a good trade off

40:54Jase:Absolutely. Well, I don't. Well, he just needed a bit of a break as well because you guys were starting to get pretty around with each other. I was fuming about it. I'll be bloody straight up about it. I'm sorry, man. Pugs, do you think you and Dilly did a good job and sort of essentially paid your way in terms of the output of what you guys were doing? So if I can just say first, we were offered a review ticket. So Dylan and I were offered a ticket to go to Laneway, get a ticket and review it. And is there a review? There is a review. Oh, is there? It's up now on horeki.co.nz.

41:28Keyzie:We put that on last night. Well, not really. I'm not really that interested in it. Well, no, Jase, it's not for you, man. You know, it's for people. Oh, it is if you want, Jase, but you don't, so that's fine. I'm going to waste my time with that sort of stuff. I've read it, man. It's not for you. Okay, so you wrote a review there, Pugs. Also, part of the deal was probably that you're going to promote Laneway and show off how good it is. No, that wasn't part of the deal. So everything that we did was sort of an addition to that review. Right, okay. Yeah. Okay, so uploading social content and stuff wasn't part of the deal.

41:57Oh, I mean, you know, we said to the boss that we'd make something out of it, but that was sort of off our own back. Right, so we wanted to do that for Horaki. The social media guy going along, he didn't have to deliver any socials. Oh, there wasn't a number discussed, you know. We just thought, we'll just go off the back of it and we'll just make it our own, you know. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And also, rest assured, Pugs, I'm just trying to figure out how it all works.

42:18Keyzie:Absolutely, yeah, totally. So the social media guy, Dilly. Yeah. Yeah, you know Dillier. He did know social media. Well, he did a few things, and Pugs did too. And let's not forget Pugs' job is to chuck social on our page. He put a video up of wet leg playing and said, where's at hoity J? So that's pretty good stuff.

42:37Jase:That was because three years ago, Jase, you did a throbber and it was wet leg. And it won too. Yeah, and we've just run that joke into the ground ever since, so I thought it seemed appropriate. Another photo is of Pugsun and his Winkle Picker shoes, Jase, I think you described them as, and a wallet chain. And it just said, at Call Me Pugs, at Geese Band, New York City. So it's kind of like a plug of his own profile. Yeah. A photo of his shoes and wallet chain. Yeah. Sorry, Chris, what you've taken there is a screenshot of a video. I was in a video. And that was a skit where I did this stupid, it was funny, it was a stupid bit about, you know, there being geese in the lake.

43:15Geese. And me going, where's geese? I can't see the geese. Where is the geese? The band, right? Right. Up on the stage. playing behind me. Just a little fun one for the fellas there. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

43:25Jase:Did you write that on Molly?

43:31That took weeks of planning, Minogue. The next photo is a woman in a leotard, tight-fitting leotard, and then the last one is Pug still at the party at the very end with the question, has anyone seen Big Dilly?

43:45Jase:No, that says, has anyone seen A? Big Dilly. Oh, is that what that says? Yeah, yeah. Sorry, I don't have my glasses on. Couldn't find one at the festival for the lie for me.

43:53Keyzie:Hashtag I'm in the mood. That is what it says. Now, I guess the question is, fellas, are we happy with the output considering the day off? Just on that other one of the women in a leotard, that was the band Wolf Alice. That was my favourite band of the day. Really recommend you guys give them a listen. They were bloody epic. So we were called. Sorry, Will Fellas. Wolf. Wolf. Wooly Fellas. Wolf Fellas. Wolf. Wooly Fellas. That's quite a good. Wolf. Wolf Fellas. That's a good name. Sort of leads into me asking where the dilly was, you know. Right, okay. So, fellas, are we happy with the output for the day off?

44:25And is it something we'd be happy to do in the future?

44:30Jase:Look, I think the more time that Pugs can have, you know, sort of out and about in the wild, I think the better for everyone. So that when he is here, he's feeling, you know, full of beans. Obviously not today. No. Yeah, I mean, he looks terrible. And tomorrow's going to be Tuesday, so that's going to be sharp. Yeah, so he'll be even more depressed.

44:49Keyzie:It was on Thursday. It was on the come down. It was literally last Thursday. As I say, and as you pointed out, Mogi, there's been a lot of tension in the offices when we walk in and bump into our pucks. I think it's probably a good thing that he got out of the studio for a while and just cooled down a little bit. Is this because I didn't offer you one of my bliss balls in the studio? Get out.

45:12The Hauraki Beat Show with Jase, Mike and Keezy. Tune in weekdays at 4 on Radio Hauraki.

45:18Keyzie:Welcome back, you massive backbones. Hope your Monday's going along. Tickety-boo, you're listening to The Big Show, brought to you by Reburg Gear. Serving good times and good food. Dine in or take away Reburg Gear today.

45:33That's so good, Pugs. That's a brand new sting, by the way. Bloody good. Do you want to know what I'm having for dinner tonight, Felix? Yes, I do, actually. Spent all day slow roasting a pork shoulder.

45:43Jase:How do you speak? You just put it on. Surely you're not doing anything after that. No, literally my wife did it, to be fair. She put it in the oven and then walked away? Slow cooking, actually. It's not even slow roasting. It's just slow cooking. Is there liquid in there? Is there an easier meal to make? No, no, it's great. There is a bit of liquid in there. Jace didn't see what she was doing, but I know there was garlic involved. Yes. But we're making pork... Mints. Bowel bun, no. Pork bowel buns. Have you got a mincer at home? You're making your own mincer. Mogi, look The problem is This is the kind of show Where, oh, Keezy makes his own mints Well, there's nothing wrong with that, Keezy It becomes like a yarn You're a mints connoisseur Honestly, I do You're not happy with the mints That they've got at the supermarket So you made your own

46:28Keyzie:I used to live above a butcher shop, fellas I think I've told you this in the past And I was fascinated by the preparation of your meats Your minces, your sausages All that sort of stuff Just a note to all the punters out there, by the way beware marinated meats. That's the old stuff. Yes, basically. That's amazing insight, Jason. Chuck a marinade on it and she'll be sweet as. It's a question. Is there ever lamb mints? Yes, there is. It's a much leaner meat. It is. It is. Yeah. Whereas your pork mints. What? Don't talk shit about pork mints, Jason. You're on thin ice here, mate. It is just very fatty.

47:04Yes. Yeah, you're right. It's delicious too. Anyway, yeah, I'm having bowel buns. That's good shit.

47:11Keyzie:Can you send me some pics of those when you make them? Can you put them on the chat? No. Why? You're not going to pull your pork, hey? I'm going to pull it. My wife will do it. Your wife will pull your pork? Yeah. Okay. And stuff it in a bun. Green day? Okay. The Hauraki Big Show. Weekdays from four on Radio Hauraki. Powderfinger there on the Radio Hauraki Big Show this Monday evening. Now, fellas, I was reclining on my couch yesterday, Sunday afternoon. Is this big city life? I suppose so. With me, Hoity J. With me, Hoity J. What were you saying, man? Something about a couch? I was lying on my couch, just relaxing.

48:00Keyzie:And all of a sudden, completely out of the blue, and at full tit, I heard this. Sorry, that's the Reebergast thing. That's the wrong one. Hang on. It's this one here.

48:28Jase:Was that Yummy Boys DJing outside? Yeah, it sounded a bit yummy.

48:31Keyzie:It did sound a bit like the Yummy Boys. And I kid you not, it was about that loud. Right. And I just leapt up. And it was a dude just with his stereo system there. I don't know what he had. Just pumping out the tunes. And he did that for about an hour and a half. Right. Just sat directly under my window. And it was like that as well. It wasn't just one sort of track or tune. It just jumped from different forms of music to other forms of music. Completely different genres as well. So here we go again.

49:17Now, Pugs has a theory that he was connected via Bluetooth to the speaker and he was actually just scrolling TikTok.

49:22Keyzie:Yeah, well, that would make sense to me. But was there people talking and then music and then people talking? He was just literally sitting there with his stereo or whatever, just sitting under the window just playing tunes. Was he on his phone? Yeah, I think he did have a phone, so he must have been scrolling. And so how much do you regret moving into the city? I love it. Yeah. I genuinely love it. It's fantastic. And the first night we stayed in our place, shocking sleep. Terribly noisy. And there's always every night some sort of hurr of an argument going on. You know, I arrive back from my old place today and, you know, there's two cop vans and about four cop cars just outside the place and stuff.

50:06Jase:Is that when you called 111 because you couldn't work out how to get your TV working?

50:11Keyzie:Yeah, somebody. But seriously, it's great. But on the good side of it, we have walked, you know, 35K, probably nearly 40K over the weekend. The interesting thing is, Jase, like I don't – do you know Moggy, who's on the big show? Yes. So he recently had a small bird keeping him up in the morning. It would go off at about 4am or something. Every day, yeah. You've got fights, cops, people playing music. Are you getting any sleep at all? Sleeping like a baby. Yeah. Absolutely sleeping like a baby, Casey. Totally, man. Okay. It's great. It's good. Thanks, man. How's your bird going?

50:51Jase:Dead as a dodo. Did you kill it? The Horaki Big Show. With Jace, Mike and Kesey. Tune in weekdays at four on Radio Hodaki.

50:59Keyzie:Indeed, it would have told to fire you up, fellas, this Monday evening. What's this? A Radio Hodaki bar tab? That's right, the Hodaki bar tab, where you call up and you can win meat and cash every single day this week. Thanks to Beef and Lamb New Zealand and we're celebrating National Lamb Day which is of course February 15th, fellas. Oh, is it?

51:31Jase:Yeah, because it's always the way that it goes. It's Valentine's Day and then you get into the really good holiday. Then you have like Auckland Anniversary Weekend and then Waitangi and then National Lamb Day. Well, then Valentine's Day and then National Lamb Day.

51:48Keyzie:And then, yeah, 15th of March is Porkman's Day. No, it isn't, Jase. Everyone knows that's in September. Come on, man. Don't try to pull the wool over my eyes. Oh, bad. Bad. So earlier in the show, there was a queue to call. Three people got through to us. Three people went in the draw to win a callback from us with some cash and a meat pack. Pugs has done a lucky dip, and it's time to call the winner now, fellas. Oh, how exciting.

52:16Jase:We're calling Cam, all right? Cam-a-lam-a-ding-dong. How good. That's his name. Jase, you talk. Jase.

52:24Keyzie:Well, they will when he answers, can we? Shh. Here he comes. G'day, Fjellar. Oh, g'day, Cam, you mad bastard. How's life? Yeah, not bad, boys. Good on you, mate. Yeah, very well. What do you do for a crust, man? I'm a chippy, mate. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, bad boy. Good on you. Jase, it feels like we've only just spoken not that long ago, Cam. Yeah, it wasn't too long ago, Hoi J, actually. My mind hasn't wandered from you at all, mate. Oh, good on you, mate. Hey, Cam, man, do you want our meat? Oh, I love your meat, fellas. Beautiful. Good on you, mate. Well, the good news is you've won that$100 cash, and you've also won a beef and lamb New Zealand meat pack.

53:03Woo-hoo. Yeah, boy, boys.

53:05Keyzie:Hey, when you prepare that meat, I want pics sent through to our Instagram, all right? Oh, absolutely, fellas. I'll have you tagged and all of it. Good on you, Cam. So when you take photos of your meat, send it straight to Hoity J, all right? He loves it.

53:19Jase:When your meat's all prepped. Pics of meat to Hoity J. Yeah. And that goes for anyone listening as well. He loves it. All right, Cam, will you hold the line there, brother, and we'll go to Pugs there, and he'll send out that cash and that meat for you, all right? You just might have to wait a bit there, Cam.

53:36Keyzie:Pugs has got balls in his mouth at the moment, so he might be. What are you talking about? What has he got in his mouth? Balls. What kind of balls? You know those lolly. Bliss balls. Bliss balls. Oh, he's eating bliss balls. Yeah, right. Just for context for everyone listening. Hey, fellas, our farmers and food producers keep this country going. So why not raise a chop to them on National Lamb Day? Duh. It's good stuff, Mogi. Don't forget to listen out tomorrow for your chance to win some cash and meat as well.

54:04Jase:Yeah, I'll listen out tomorrow, is it? No, you'll be on the show. Tomorrow. Yeah, but I'll still be listening. No, I know, but... I'll be listening out. Yes. Oh, yeah. The Hauraki Big Show. Weekdays from four on Radio Hauraki.

54:26Keyzie:Well, there you go, you mad bastards. That's a big show done and dusted this Monday evening. Jeez, I hope you enjoyed it. Oh, I reckon.

54:32Jase:I might be able to sleep if you didn't.

54:33Keyzie:Yeah, same. Wow. I'll be fretting about it all the way home. Hey, fellas, have you heard about the podcast outro, man? What's today's clip? Oh, yeah, it's bonus content. Here's today's clip. Pugs is giving me the signal. No, don't play it.

54:47Jase:It's a shocking bastard. He's forgotten it. He's forgotten it. Oh, he's had a mozart.

54:50Keyzie:Oh, my. Oh, Pugs, don't worry about it. Don't worry about it. We're not going to do it. It's fine.

54:54Jase:That's a shame. That's fine, man. That's all G, Pugs. Can you just make a note of that? Yeah, I've made a note of it. Thanks, man. Oh, he's saying he did load it up. Yeah, he's saying he did load it up. He's mentally just nice. He's not here. Here it is. Here's a clip of today's podcast outro. Can I ask you what's happened to the duck?

55:13Keyzie:Walter had to go. Where's he gone? We've got, funnily enough, just on that. Yeah, he's in the apartment. He's got his own little place. We do have a family. He's got a one-bedroom on Queen Street. A mother duck and about six chicks, chicklings. Six chickens.

55:31Jase:Also known as ducklings.

55:32Keyzie:Ducklings.

55:35Jase:Couldn't find the word there for a while, fellas.

55:37Keyzie:Six chicklings. That's what we're here for, man. Totally, totally. So if you want to hear more duck chat, 7.30 tonight, that potty comes out. Give it a search. How good.

55:47Jase:Mogi, your plans for the night, please? I'm riding my push bike home. so just be careful for, look out for me on the roads there. Don't run me down. Okay. And then, I don't know actually, what is good about old Grandma Sue going and there's not very much, I've really enjoyed her company, is now we can start watching some things that I want to watch. Some movies, One Battle After Another if that's something. Yep. And that, A Night of the Seven Kingdoms, the spin-off from Game of Thrones which I'm really looking forward to. A mate of mine touched base with me over the weekend and he said it's brilliant so I'm looking forward to watching that.

56:19Keyzie:It is good. It is getting better too. Kesey, I know that you're having pulled pork buns. Bower buns. Bower buns. What are you doing tonight, Jase? I've got to wander home, then go out and eat something. And wander back.

56:34Jase:So good, man. Look at this. Look at old holly jizz pot.

56:36Keyzie:Yeah, man.

56:37Jase:Getting out and about, man.

56:38Keyzie:It's pretty exciting. Good times. Hey, now listen. Make sure you check out the podcast. Make sure you check out the Instagram account. Until tomorrow, see ya.

56:49Keyzie:you