FULL SHOW: The Recital

9:49Keyzie:Yeah. Hey, let's go to the phone lines. G'day, Lemon, you mad bastard. How's life?

9:55Mike Minogue:Oh, hey, fellas.

9:56Keyzie:How we going? Yeah, good, thanks, Lemon. Why Lemon? Where did you get Lemon from?

10:01Mike Minogue:Oh, it's a big story. I don't have enough time to tell you, fellas. Oh, that's okay, mate. That's okay. You know, it just happens. Yeah.

10:08Keyzie:Hey, tell me, Lemon, what do you do for a crust? Oh, mate, so I go around from bar to bar and just sort out the tap.

10:16Mike Minogue:Oh, tap clean.

10:18Keyzie:Yeah, nice. Back bite.

10:21Mike Minogue:How often, Lemon, how often do you have to clear out the old lines there? Oh, I'll give it a monthly clean, maybe a fortnightly clean. Yeah, geez, okay. So either a month or half as long as that.

10:34Keyzie:Yeah, you know it, you know it. Just depends.

10:37Mike Minogue:Yeah, yeah, yeah, good on you, Lemon.

10:38Keyzie:Hey, Lemon, who would you take with you if you won?

10:42Mike Minogue:Oh, I'm sure I'd probably get a couple of the homies to wrestle it out and see if we could come out victorious.

10:48Keyzie:Yeah, okay, good on you, mate. Will you stay on the line? Stay on the line, man. And Pugs, I'm going to look after you in Studio B now. Ethan. Ethan on line six. G'day, Ethan. How are you going? Good, fellas. How are you? Yeah, good, thanks, mate. Good. Looking forward to Christmas, Ethan?

11:03Mike Minogue:Oh, absolutely, mate. Absolutely. Can't wait for a bit of a breakout. Oh, you're very good, man. What do you do for a cross, by the way? I'm a sparky, mate. Yeah, you're just a backbone, that's all. Yeah, just a massive backbone. Just plain and simple, man. Backbone. You've got it written on your van there, don't you? Backbone electrical. Backbone written all over it. See, that would be a great name for a Sparky business.

11:22Keyzie:Absolutely, mate. It would. Let's go.

11:24Mike Minogue:Good, Ethan.

11:26Keyzie:Yeah, that's not bad either, actually. Thanks, man. I saw it. Throw that out there. You can use that, Ethan. Ethan, who would you take with you?

11:33Mike Minogue:Oh, I'd probably take one of the boys, mate. Oh, yeah. That's a one, man. Yeah, OK. One of the fellas. Which one are you thinking, man? I don't know. Name's Matt. He's probably listening. Yeah, man, Matt. Oh, God. He's a shocking bastard. Yeah, he's terrible, man. Honestly, don't do it, Ethan. Seriously, he's a shocker. A weird-looking bastard as well.

11:52Keyzie:He is quite odd, isn't he? Yeah, man. I mean, I didn't want to say that. Yeah. You should have seen what he looked like as a baby. Oh, I saw it, man. Oh, did you see the... I read the article. Don't worry about that. Oh, wow. Hey, well, Ethan, good luck with that, mate. Stay on the line and old Pugsam will sort you out, all right? Cheers, pal. Good on you, mate. Get on your knees. Tell you what, man, and I've went over there before as well. They're in New Zealand. They're working with United Airlines now. And the connections over there, so you fly into America, the connections that you can get around the country with United Airlines are absolutely seamless.

12:25I'll put it to you this way, Keezy. You can experience it all. That's the only way I can put it to you. Yeah, right. When you fly with Air New Zealand and you've got those United Airlines connections, man, you can experience it at all.

12:35Mike Minogue:Did you say it was seamless? Seamless. God. That's not something I would say. The Hauraki Big Show with Jace, Mike and Keezy. Tune in weekdays at 4 on Radio Hauraki.

12:46Keyzie:Super Groove there on the radio. Hauraki Big Show this Thursday afternoon. The time is 4.36. New Zealand currently 2.28 for 6, leading by 23. Effectively 2.28 for 7, of course, because Tickner's massively injured.

13:00Mike Minogue:Yeah. Hey, fellas, just a bit of a PSA, a public service announcement I thought we could do today. I filmed my first ever commercial A couple of days ago And I was in my undies for a lot of it And it was a really hot day I sunblocked up Did you slip, slop, slurp and slash? I slip, slop Squirt And wrap So I did all the above

13:24Keyzie:Except the wrap because you were just in your undies

13:26Mike Minogue:I also didn't have a hat on or a sunnies or whatever But I did do all of that And I was feeling very safe out there And I was like sweet, I'm doing a good job here I reapplied after a couple of hours there, a couple of times. However, later at night, I realised my feet were burnt. Right. The tops of my feet. And I realised I did my arms, my legs, everything, and I neglected my feet. Why did you do that? You don't think about sunblocking the tops of your feet, you know? Well, I don't anyway. And I got burnt. And I just want to say, hey, remember to sunblock your feet. Just on that, on a serious note here.

14:03Keyzie:It is. Picture, if you will, fellas, one of you chaps there having a Barbie on the deck in your shorts. They're sort of billowing in the wind.

14:14Mike Minogue:Quite baggy shorts?

14:16Keyzie:Yeah, they'll be baggy shorts or just quite short shorts in Mogi's case.

14:19Mike Minogue:Right. A bit of testicular overhang or a gaping, if you will, of the short.

14:25Keyzie:Sorry, this is on a serious note here? This is on a serious note. Okay. Apparently, sunburnt scrotums are actually, and because the skin's so sensitive there, because it doesn't often see the sun, can lead to really serious consequences. So if you're going to be wearing shorts out in summertime, slip, slop, squirt the balls.

14:46Mike Minogue:Yeah, right, okay. I'll make sure you're good in that regard. Because you're smooth? No, because my, what do you call it, ball bag, tough as old boots. Oh, yeah, yeah. So it's seen a lot of sun. It's seen a lot of sun. I was very early getting my rucksack out. Yeah, yeah, yeah, same here. In fact, I've never even heard of people with that even happening. Yeah.

15:09Keyzie:I would have thought in your case actually, Moggy, because you've got the most beautifully smooth marbled testicles. I do. That you're really prone to. So I was actually thinking of you when I was thinking about that. No, no, no, no, not at all, because they've been out in the sun from a very young age. Oh, okay. Yeah, yeah, yeah. They're tough and they get it. That's the thing about my balls, they get it. Yeah, yeah, totally. They look forward to the sun. Okay, well, that's fine. They say to the sun, they look up at the sun and they go, bring it. Bring it on. Can I just say then? That's what my balls say.

15:36Keyzie:Yeah, yeah. Can I just say then from this perspective, if you've been a young fellow and you've had your balls out all the time, then you'll be fine. Yeah, thanks. But if you're like me and you haven't had your balls out all the time.

15:46Mike Minogue:I'd say most people will be in that camp.

15:47Keyzie:Yeah, most. It's a big camp. Just be weary of that, particularly if you're getting older and they're sagging.

15:54Mike Minogue:Well, thanks for that, J. See, on a serious note, thank you very much for that. because feet, tops of feet, obviously for some people, as you mentioned, various parts of your genitalia there. The other thing is your ears. Yes. Do you sunblock your ears behind there on the tops as well and even inside your ears? Yes. Because I've had burnt inner ear before. Shaft.

16:14Keyzie:I'm not squirting anything in my ear, Keezy. All right, let's just be clear now.

16:19Mike Minogue:Sorry, that's not how you apply sunscreen. You don't squirt it directly into your ear. You put some on your hand, put your finger in, and just sort of rub it around the rim.

16:26Keyzie:Right. Oh, the way you just did that made me feel slightly nauseous.

16:29Mike Minogue:Right, because I just sat here for two minutes while you chatted about Mogi's balls.

16:34Keyzie:Okay.

16:35Mike Minogue:But, yeah, just...

16:36Keyzie:Any other tips from the listeners out there, by the way, 3483? Things that we've forgotten, perhaps.

16:43Mike Minogue:Yeah, where should you sunblock every text in the drawer for a$50 Reburger voucher, so that's good. The Hauraki Big Show, weekdays from four on Radio Hauraki.

16:52Keyzie:David Bowie there on the Radio Hauraki Big Show this Thursday. afternoon. The time is 4.49. New Zealand currently 2.31 for six, leading by 26. Let's talk TV. What's on the telly with Mike Minogue?

17:12Keyzie:Yeah. Yes. Yes. Oh, yeah. Yeah, guys, come on, man. Yes. Fellas, last night I went and saw it, Dynamotion A Christmas Crisis It's a play, it's on at Q Theatre here in Auckland It says, you'll laugh, you'll cry Like you'll, haha. You'll dance So it's, Dynamotion are effectively a dance troupe and they do this every year I believe Tom Sainsbury Lara Fishel Chisholm, Chris Parker Lieutenant, four of the probably might be close to 15 people in it and it started out and there was a couple of dance routines and I went oh shit yeah tell me it's not going to be this I haven't seen it before, I haven't seen them before so I was like oh no but it turns out that it's got a whole story behind it Mr and Mrs Claus are headed for Splitsville Ashley's Christmas cupcake shop is teetering on the edge and the elves are cracking under the pressure of soulless consumerism so that's sort of the set up for it, the three separate storylines that are going on, tied together by a narrator who last night was our very own Matt Heath.

18:30Oh, really? Or formerly our own Matt Heath. Yes. No longer our own.

18:33Mike Minogue:Matt Heath narrated it. He narrated it, that's right. He sat in a chair and he narrated it. That's cool. Yeah, it was. It was really good. And can I say, absolutely hilarious, brilliant. I know your missus is keen to go and see it. Keezy, you've got to go, man. You simply must. Wow. A lot of fun. Very, very clever writing. Very, very funny. The dance seems really good. Some of the dancing better than others. But at least they're getting out there and giving it a go, Kesey. What are you doing? Well, yeah, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to offend. Four and a half buzzies out of five. Wow. A fun experience.

19:05I reckon if you got a few wines into your first, you'd really be loving it. So I reckon if your missus there got a few girlfriends along, Kesey, I don't know if you'd go, man. Would you go? You'd like to go? Yeah, I'd like to go. Yeah, you'd like it too, I think. So I wholly recommend it. Get along. Tickets are on sale now. Obviously only for people in Auckland. and everybody else would just have to suffer. What's it called again? It's called A Christmas Crisis, as presented by Dynamotion. It's at the Q Theatre, and I think it goes for another possible week, maybe. Cool.

19:33Keyzie:I've got nothing much to add, fellas. I flitted and chatted with my wife and discussed various things without really paying any attention to the television.

19:45Mike Minogue:How many buzzies out of five? The chat? Just last night, yeah. Three and a half pussies Wow So she's got some work to do Oh I mean

19:54Keyzie:We've all got work to do Keezy Right okay

19:58Mike Minogue:I watched the show last night Wasn't it Look Full disclosure It was a house renovation show Okay It was a house renovation show Right It was in New Zealand However the difference with this one It was one I enjoyed more Than any of the other ones I've watched Was it was a couple With like an old brick townhouse A young couple An old brick townhouse In Tauranga The value of the house Was maybe 700 ,000 just or so. Like it was just a very small two bedroom. Their budget wasn't massive. They looked around at other places they could afford. They were kind of small and very like realistic as opposed to like an older couple with millions of dollars doing a massive reno.

20:33Mike Minogue:And it was actually the most enjoyable one I've seen because it was actually relatable.

20:36Keyzie:Right.

20:37Mike Minogue:You know? Yeah. Just a young couple there.

20:39Keyzie:I mean, is renovation a young person's game in general? I think it kind of is, isn't it? When you're getting older, I mean, I don't do any renos, but when you're getting older, it's like, oh, I can't be arsed. Depends if you're doing it or paying for it. Yeah, that's what I mean.

20:52Mike Minogue:Yeah, when you're like, if you can afford, if you, in my mind, it's like I may as well go and do radio and get paid to do that rather than having to crack it, you know, taking a wall out or something. Yes. Because there's someone better qualified to do it, you know.

21:03Keyzie:Yes, yeah.

21:04Mike Minogue:But I give that episode, it was Love It All List It, New Zealand. I give that episode 3.9 busies out of five. Wow.

21:10Keyzie:Okay, very nice. Just on that, by the way, New Zealand losing another wicket. That Phillips is out. 2.33 for seven. Here's Weezer. It's not enough, Jase. It's not enough, no.

21:20Mike Minogue:The Hauraki Big Show. Weekdays from four on Radio Hauraki.

21:24Keyzie:Weezer there on the Radio Hauraki Big Show. This Thursday afternoon, the time, three minutes to five o 'clock. Plenty coming up after five, by the way.

21:32Mike Minogue:That's right, Jase. I've organised an interview with an old friend of yours.

21:35Keyzie:Oh, okay. Someone from the past.

21:37Mike Minogue:I think you'll be very pleased to see that they'll be in just after five o 'clock.

21:40Keyzie:Is this like a sort of this is your life kind of scenario? Kind of.

21:44Mike Minogue:It's certainly reflective.

21:46Keyzie:Right, so it'll be heaps of people. I don't know if I'm in the mood to be devastatingly sad.

21:52Mike Minogue:Oh, no, it won't be his actual life because we don't want to bring the mood down. Also, earlier in the show, I was going on about how I burnt the tops of my feet by accident by forgetting to put sunblock on there. Yeah. We were discussing places you need to remember to put sunblock that you often don't think of. That's true. Topsy of feet, you know, the tops of your ears. Jase, you were saying your scrotum. Yes. Lots of texts coming through on 3483. I'm going to say 90 % of them are backdoor related.

22:19Keyzie:Right. Well, I mean, I don't know about you guys. I don't sunblock my backdoor. No, neither do I. I don't see the point of it. No, neither do I. Well, a lot of people do that brown eye to the sky sort of thing.

22:32Mike Minogue:Oh, sunning your perineum. Thank you. Yeah, yeah, yeah. So if you're doing that, I guess. You've never heard of it. No, you haven't lived. But feel free, by the way, on 3483 to stop texting through, put sunblock on your back door because we've got that enough now.

22:43Keyzie:Yeah, thanks, team.

22:46Mike Minogue:The Hauraki Big Show with Jase, Mike and Keezy. Tune in weekdays at 4 on Radio Hauraki.

22:52Keyzie:You're welcome back, you massive backbones. Hope you're enjoying your Thursday afternoon. You're listening to The Big Show brought to you by Rebergear.

23:00Mike Minogue:Craveworthy street food freshly made with old Rebergear.

23:08Mike Minogue:You already played that one, man.

23:10Keyzie:Yeah, man. Come on, man. Yeah. It's really annoying. I know it's my...

23:20Keyzie:Slash down to the boundary there by folks, by the way, for another boundary. We lead by 44 fans.

23:26Mike Minogue:Are you doing the commentary or are we doing the big show?

23:28Keyzie:No, I'm just letting people know what's happening there. A nice little slash down to third man for four. Beautiful stuff. Have you ever thought about doing cricket commentary? Well, people have spoken to me about it. I'd give it a nudge if I was asked, for sure.

23:42Mike Minogue:Yeah, right.

23:42Keyzie:I'd love to do a bit of commentary. Travel around the world, fellas. How good would that be? Oh, you'd love it. Just talk cricket day after day after day.

23:52Mike Minogue:Hey, pretty exciting, guys. Interview coming up shortly. Someone from Jace's past. I'll reveal who that is exactly. No, Mogi, soon. I'll tell you, man. How about this? I'll tell you secretly. Okay. And you don't say anything to Jase. Okay, good. Okay, we'll do that next.

24:08Keyzie:In the meantime, here's the Arctic Monkeys. In your face, Jase. Yeah, man.

24:13Mike Minogue:The Hodaki Big Show. Weekdays from four on Radio Hodaki.

24:17Keyzie:To all there on the Radio Hodaki Big Show this glorious Thursday afternoon.

24:23Mike Minogue:Jase, we've got a bone to pick with you, man, if that's all good. I've got a bone to pick. Beginning of the year, you came on air. You said you've got a New Year's resolution. It was to learn 12 songs on piano, 12 songs of an album by a man called Paul Buchanan, who I've never heard of. And then you started learning one of his songs called Mid-Ear. Yeah. That was in like February. Did you do 12? Was it meant to be 12 or 10? He's only got 10 songs on that album. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Okay, so it was 10 songs. Sorry. What I've noticed is that your keyboard that we organised and you got for free, this is a very expensive keyboard, has been on a desk in our office since we did the Night of Culture.

25:03Mike Minogue:Yeah. For the comedy festival, which was in May. Mm-hmm. Yeah. So how have you been tracking?

25:10Keyzie:Pretty good, actually, Keezy.

25:12Mike Minogue:Right, without the keyboard, you've been tracking good.

25:13Keyzie:Well, because I've also got another one at home. Oh, really? That I've been tinkering with. Not as good as the one out here.

25:19Mike Minogue:Right.

25:20Keyzie:But often I'll get in here early as well before you fellas turn up for the show and have a bit of a blast. Right. Yeah, so.

25:27Mike Minogue:Right, okay. because I was... Look, you remember how Nick and Elliot from the music school got in touch and actually asked if you wanted a free keyboard? Yes. Yeah, they're coming in today to see how your progress is going.

25:42Keyzie:Oh, you're joking.

25:43Mike Minogue:And I also told them they can probably take the keyboard away because you're not using it.

25:48Keyzie:I mean, I'll have to take the stickers off it that tell me what all the chord things are.

25:53Mike Minogue:So they're going to be coming in next, and I have told them that... You're joking, Keezy. No, that you will be able to sort of update them on how your progress has been going and maybe play something for them. That sounds good, man. Do you reckon you could do that? Especially if you've been practising at home, which I'm assuming you... You definitely have been practising at home, right? Oh, yeah, definitely, man, definitely. Like you didn't just make up that you have a second... Because you don't seem to be that bothered that they're going to take away this really expensive keyboard from you.

26:15Keyzie:Well, as I say, I've got one at home. It's not as good. I'll be disappointed because, you know, as I say, I like to get in here early and have a bit of a tutu before you guys turn up. Look, can I just like to say, and just open the door for you, just leave it ajar here a little bit. If you don't know how to play, it's perfectly fine. Just say you don't know how to play. Oh, yeah, for sure, for sure. I wouldn't try and, you know, bollocks my way through it, fellas.

26:38Mike Minogue:Well, because everyone's New Year's resolutions, they always fail at some point. So you're allowed to just admit right now, hey, I haven't followed it. Just say I said I was going to do it and I was lying and I never followed through. And despite the fact I had hours and days and months of free time on my hands, I just couldn't be arsed. And I let everyone down. I wasted everyone's time. You can just say that. Yeah, absolutely. Before you waste any more time of these people that believed in you, as Keezy often believes in you for no reason, whereas I never believe in you. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Because these people, they're from a music school.

27:13Mike Minogue:Yeah, totes, totes. They're paying off the rental of that keyboard. It's been sitting there. Yeah, yeah. So if you say now, or when they come in next, you can just say, hey, guys, I haven't done it. Thanks for the keyboard. Sorry for wasting your time. Here's 150 or 200, you know, 10 months rental.

27:26Keyzie:They don't need to come in. Well, they're already coming in.

27:29Mike Minogue:They're coming in after this next song.

27:31Keyzie:Yeah. Right.

27:32Mike Minogue:So you can just say to them.

27:33Keyzie:Yeah, I mean, I would if that were the situation, of course. Okay. So you're happy to play a song? I'll look if I have to.

27:39Mike Minogue:Right, okay. Well, they're coming in next then, Elliot and Nick. In the meantime, The Clash. Do you like Clamp Down? This is a tune, man.

27:47Keyzie:Yeah, I don't mind it.

27:48Mike Minogue:The Hauraki Big Show. Weekdays from four on Radio Hauraki.

27:52Keyzie:Yes, indeed. The Clash there on the Radio Hodaki Big Show this glorious Thursday afternoon.

27:59Mike Minogue:Yeah, joining us in studio right now, Jase, Nick and Elliot from Elliot's Music Academy. Welcome to the studio, guys. Good afternoon. Thank you. Thank you for having us.

28:07Keyzie:Oh, look, it's always a pleasure, team. I know you love it, Jase. Absolute pleasure.

28:11Mike Minogue:I can see it on your face when we walk in every time. Yeah, yeah, absolutely. The excitement's real.

28:15Keyzie:How's the Academy going?

28:16Mike Minogue:It's good. It's going great. Yeah, is it? It's a great year. We opened a new Academy in Botany. Oh, okay. And in Takapuna. Wow. We have four locations. Four academies. How good. But for you, Jase, we come to you. Yeah. Oh, right. How many students do you have across those four academies? 1 ,000. Is that right? Yeah. That's amazing. 1 ,003, to be precise. And generally, I'd imagine at the end of the year, you start doing a bunch of recitals. You're forcing parents to come in and listen, not only to their own child and see their progress, but also, even worse than that, every other kid that they've got no investment in whatsoever.

28:53Mike Minogue:The two hours following. That's right. Is that how long yours are? Because I've just been through it with my daughter for a dance recital. She's six. It was two and a half hours long. It was bullshit. Yeah. Two and a half's pretty long. I like the 90-minute mark. Feels long. That feels long. A bit of this, a bit of that. But sometimes they go for a couple hours. Yeah. Now, quick question. Nick and Elliot from Elliot's Music Academy. Out of those 1 ,000-plus students per year, how many students sort of meet expectations or exceed and how many students do not? Well, I mean, we have a variety of expectations.

29:29Mike Minogue:Yeah, good answer, man, good answer. So, you know, sometimes people might want to work towards an exam. Their biggest thing might be doing a performance. Yes. Some might just be that they turn up each week and jam some ACDC.

29:43Keyzie:Yeah, totally, man, totally. But it's quite good in this case, isn't it, because you must often, and I'm assuming you teach kids that are really young, you must find that the dream, more often than not, is coming from the parents and it's been put on the kid and it's not necessarily something that the kid wants to do. Whereas with Jase, his thing was, I'm going to do this album, I'm going to do these 10 songs, it's something I can work towards over the course of the year. So it must be easier to teach people where they are the ones that want to do the thing. They're self-motivated. Yeah, for sure.

30:11Mike Minogue:Now, if people just joining, Jase had a New Year's resolution, he wanted to learn 10 songs by Paul Buchanan on the keyboard and Nick and Elliot actually organised for this amazing – what's the value of that keyboard? I'm going to put it at 1 ,003. So the same as our students actually. Right, 1 ,000 bucks.

30:29Keyzie:And let me tell you, worth every cent. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Big Christmas plans, Dave? Got some big Christmas plans?

30:35Mike Minogue:Just seeing you play, Dave. All right, so James – That's my Christmas present. It was Elliot's birthday on Tuesday and this is her gift.

30:45Keyzie:Oh, wow. Oh, wow.

30:46Mike Minogue:Have you learned Happy Birthday yet or is that?

30:48Keyzie:It's not in my repertoire, they're teasing.

30:51Mike Minogue:Okay, so first question, Jase. Have you learned the 10 songs by Paul Buchanan?

30:56Keyzie:Should I just? Do you just want to play something? Just play.

31:00Mike Minogue:All right, well, don't play for too long. Can you play for like 20 seconds? I can play for 20 seconds or so? 30 seconds. Yeah, yeah, man. Ready?

31:07Keyzie:It's just a little piece that I've.

31:09Mike Minogue:You actually wrote? Yeah. Okay, yeah, righto. Yeah, yeah, cool. All right, when you're ready, mate, volume up and go for it. Wait. Okay.

31:27Keyzie:Wow.

31:43Mike Minogue:He's got the eyes closed and everything, guys.

31:45Keyzie:He does that all the time.

31:47Mike Minogue:Wow.

31:48Keyzie:God, the pianos are beautiful. Wow.

31:50Mike Minogue:Holy cow. That was really good. What do you call it, Jason?

31:54Keyzie:What do I call it? I call it receding tide. Beautiful. Yeah, thank you, man. That was fantastic. I loved it. I was thinking of you guys when I wrote it, actually.

32:04Mike Minogue:Do you have any feedback, Elliot?

32:07Keyzie:The fingering was interesting.

32:09Mike Minogue:Yeah. You know, many a note's being played just then, and I could only hear a handful.

32:15Keyzie:Yeah, yeah. Well, I was chatting to a mate who's a muso the other day and he said, I tell you what, Hoity J, you're bloody unorthodox.

32:23Mike Minogue:What was his name? Pardon?

32:28Mike Minogue:Well, look, guys, we have to wrap things up, Nick and Elliot, but any comments for Hoity J's progress so far? Anything you'd like to say? The passion is out of this world. Thank you. I love everything you put into it.

32:40Keyzie:Can I just say a massive thank you, guys, for lending me this beautiful instrument. I've got another one at home, and so I'm thinking, you know, as a goodwill gesture on my behalf, that I donate it back to the Academy, and hopefully some young whippersnapper out there will be inspired by what I've done today and use it for their musical dreams. That's a really kind of you, actually. That's fantastic. Thank you. I'll take the stickers off the keys as well if you want. As played by Jason Hoyt. As played by Jason Hoyt, yeah.

33:11Mike Minogue:I'll just play some applause for you, Jase. Yeah, thanks, mate. Oh, shit. Hang on. Here it is.

33:18Keyzie:Thank you.

33:20Mike Minogue:The Hauraki Big Show. Weekdays from four on Radio Hauraki.

33:24Keyzie:T-Rex here on the Radio Hauraki Big Show this Thursday evening. Now, fellas, after 6 o 'clock, we're going to be talking about our plan of attack for the golf tomorrow.

33:34Mike Minogue:That's right. We're at Chasing the Fox. We are playing the Chasing the Fox course itself, the same six holes as the ones that are televised. But we're playing it earlier in the day. And we're playing three ball Ambrose. We are a team, the big show team. We are. And we've never played a team sport. And that's never going to change. Can I say that? Oh, totally. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Totally. I get what you're saying, Mike. But tomorrow we're actually playing an Ambrose as a team. Oh, I see. Yeah, yes, yes. And we've never played as a team together in a sport before. So it's going to be quite interesting.

34:03Mike Minogue:Is that true?

34:05Keyzie:That's probably true. Yeah, I don't think we've ever played as a team. Oh, well, we did that running, right? The race was a team. Oh, that's right. Whatever. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I can't remember. James went pretty good. No.

34:15Mike Minogue:He went pretty good. Yeah. Well, look, so we're going to get into our strategies and things like that after 6 o 'clock. Also, don't forget, we are giving away a boat thanks to the legends at Fin Chaser Boats. It is a Fin Chaser 535 center console. It's got a Mercury 60 horse four stroke. It's got a Voyager trailer with it as well. A whole lot of other goodies. The whole thing is worth$75 ,000. If you're keen to win it, text BOAT to 3483 and come up with a name for the damn thing. Yeah, good stuff.

34:40Keyzie:Also after six o 'clock, fellas, Hooray Jay gets to finally realise a dream.

34:48Mike Minogue:The Hauraki Big Show with Jace, Mike and Keezy. Tune in weekdays at four on Radio Hauraki.

34:54Keyzie:Welcome back, you massive backbones. Hope your Thursday's going along nicely. You're listening to The Big Show, brought to you by Reburgear.

35:01Mike Minogue:Beef, chicken, vegan and vegetarian options too. Reburgear are redefining the norm. And if I could just direct your attention to this next slide, you'll see that Reburger is serving both good times and good food. And that's whether or not you dine in or take away Reburger today. And if you just look at this next slide, you'll see that it's... I want to work in that office, man. That sounds fun. That does sound a lot of fun, actually, eh? Discussing Reburger.

35:35Keyzie:Yes. Yes. I'm actually just discussing takeaways with my wife as we speak, fellas.

35:42Mike Minogue:What are you thinking, man?

35:42Keyzie:Well, I said Reburger, and she said, no, we've had too much lately. You've had so much Reburger, your hat's turned into a Reburger hat. Well, exactly, Mogi. I'm looking at your head, and you've got the Reburger logo on your head. I know. Right behind you is the Reburger logo.

35:58Mike Minogue:On a TV, yes. Out of it. It's crazy stuff. Can I guess what you are going to have? Yes. you're either going to have noodles or you're going to pick up Thai from a restaurant on the way home or maybe pizza from the pizzeria near you. I was just thinking pizza actually, but I don't think so. I think it's summary. I think you're going to be, because there's a little Vietnamese joint around the way there. I think you're going to go there. Mogi's right.

36:22Keyzie:Really? Yeah, yeah. Mogi's right, man.

36:26Mike Minogue:Which Vietnamese joint?

36:27Keyzie:Do you not know about a Vietnamese joint? Which one?

36:29Mike Minogue:One near your house?

36:31Keyzie:I'll show it to you one day, Keezy. when you're ready. It's a very sophisticated place.

36:35Mike Minogue:Right, okay, sounds it. The Hauraki Big Show, weekdays from four on Radio Hauraki.

36:41Keyzie:Ron DMC and Aerosmith there on the Radio Hauraki Big Show this Thursday evening. A very exciting day for us tomorrow out with Chasing the Fox. That's right. And the fellas are getting to play together as a team and I'm very excited about that. The good news is, Mogi, I played with old Keezy today. Genuinely, genuinely, he's shown some very good form.

37:06Mike Minogue:Great. I'm improving.

37:07Keyzie:Yeah, he played great today. The trouble is when the pressure goes on, Keezer, you're a self-confessed flake, self-confessed folder under pressure. I mean, I'm sure there's a term for it.

37:20Mike Minogue:I'd say, so traditionally with golf, I would say yes, and I have proven that. Right. The issue, and this is something I only have figured out the last couple of weeks, is I now know what I'm supposed to do with my clubs. So when I step up there with my driver, I used to just swing and hope it would go straight. Now I have five things I tick off as I do it and I know what to do. Same with my irons now. And so I'm not just hitting and hoping. And then when I was under pressure, I was hitting and hoping the pressure would. So I think I've got more of a chance to perform now because I know how to do the thing.

37:51So you just started doing that today?

37:53Mike Minogue:No, not today. Recently, like the last week or so. Right. Because I know how to chip. I know how to part. Chipping very well, Maggie. That's because I know how to do those things. And only recently I have clicked into place with driving and my irons.

38:06Keyzie:Just on that, though, still don't say anything to him on the course tomorrow, all right? Oh, no, yeah, don't put pressure on him. Don't praise or don't criticize, just shut it. Because it becomes our fault. Yes, yes, very much so.

38:19Mike Minogue:What we need to do, though, is discuss strategy. So, Jase, your job tomorrow when we're playing Ambrose, because we're all playing together, and the way it works is we all hit a ball. whichever ball is the best, we then go to that ball and hit three more. So, Jase, your job tomorrow is hit it dead straight every time.

38:35Keyzie:Yeah, look, this is what I'll do. I'll try and hit it straight and be the safe option. Sure.

38:41Mike Minogue:It'll be shorter, but it'll be dead straight, and we can always use that as a fullback. Great idea. What do you want me to do? Well, you've got to try and go long, don't you? Yes. Go the power game, and if it comes off, we're good. If not, we've got Jase who's gone straight. Okay, cool. I'll lock it in. I'll go big or go home. Yes.

38:56Keyzie:In theory. I also feel like you should go big too, Mogey. I'm just going to get on the piss. Yeah, well, that's good. That's good. That's my option. But roll the eyes back and give it a tonk because you've got a bit of power there, I reckon.

39:11Mike Minogue:If Mogey rolls those bulges back, he'll fall backwards, man. Yeah, no, fair point. Yeah, I'm just going to have a – look, I'm just going to have some fun, fellas. If I manage to contribute even a single shot over the course of the day that helps us out, then I'll be happy. Yeah.

39:25Keyzie:Do you know what I mean? It's going to be great either way. I'm looking forward to it. I just love playing on a beautiful course. I think I might also spend some time intimidating our competition. Yeah. Now, who are we playing against? Is it one other team of three?

39:37Mike Minogue:No, no, no. So the way it's working is we all are hitting off. I think we're just on our own maybe, going group after group after group. Really? Yes. They put all our scores up, and we're up against the NZ Herald, for example, has their own group of three, and then we're up against a whole lot of corporate teams and stuff. So they are trusting us to keep our own score. I don't know about the scorekeeping. That doesn't seem like a good idea, considering the last time that we lost by one stroke, our takeaway from that is moving forward, we should cheat. We should cheat, yeah. Well, let's just keep that on the down low for now.

40:08Keyzie:Yeah, right. But I'm prepared to cheat to win. Yeah, so am I. Because I don't think we've got a chance without it. But Kesey's this weird sort of moral character that says, you know, oh, no, come on, hoity J, let's do the problem. But he's also never tasted victory. So if we get you to cheat, Kesey, and you taste victory, you might see the value in the cheating. Cheating is our secret weapon. Yes.

40:28Mike Minogue:Okay. And, Jase, you're so comfortable with cheating, you were saying, having done it your whole life. Off air, yeah. Off air in various areas of your life. I mean, I should try it, right? Yeah, absolutely. Of course, we are talking about Chasing the Fox, which is on tomorrow evening. Thanks to Manuka Fuel. We will be there. So if you're listening to the show, we'll be doing it live from the Heineken Silver Tent, the clubhouse right by the final hole, having a great time having just won an Ambrose tournament. The Hauraki Big Show with Jace, Mike and Kesey. Tune in weekdays at four on Radio Hauraki.

41:00Keyzie:Foo Fighters there on the Radio Hauraki Big Show this Thursday evening. Now, fellas, I need to ask a question. This lazy boy, I was lying on it just before. She's bloody comfortable. What are we actually doing with that? Because if no one's going to take it, I'd be pretty keen to get it home.

41:16Mike Minogue:Are you referring to the Lazy Boy Neo X Power Recliner? I assume so. Yeah, yeah. So that's in the corner of the studio. What we're doing with it is basically using it, abusing it, doing whatever we want to it, and then giving it to a listener. Yes. That exact one.

41:31Keyzie:Okay, so we are giving it to a listener. I'll tell you what, Mogi's made it his. It's like his little studio nest. You know what I'm saying? I absolutely love it. Yes. The thing about Liz, and let's be honest, this is if you can get this as a bachelor, if you can get this as some kind of a flat, If you're in a flat with a bunch of mates and this is your chair, this is living like a king. Yes. You have got a remote control. It's got presets for different things. You can charge your phone on it. It's got a holder for your iPad. I think that's too much.

42:06Mike Minogue:The iPad? Yeah, I agree. Now, this thing is magnificent. Some people will value that. I would kick that off. Now, you can just take it out. It just slots out. You don't have to have it in there at all. Yes. I'd kick it off. It's got a slot here, a compartment on the side, where I think that's for magazines, but you can put a few beers in there. Yeah, totally. You know what I'm saying? Yes, absolutely. This is a magnificent prize. I've thoroughly enjoyed it because I sit in this in between songs, or while we're listening to songs, sorry, and I've been watching the cricket. I know, it's magnificent.

42:39It's stuffing your face with chips. It's full of chips. You might find my wallet in there or my sunglasses.

42:44Keyzie:Or maybe your car keys, maybe. And Mogi's been ripping ass in there as well. Yeah, yeah.

42:50Mike Minogue:If you are keen to win that, once again, it is a brand new Lazy Boy Neo X power recliner. It is only just launched in New Zealand. Text the word lazy to 3483. Get yourself in the drawer. It's got cutting edge comfort technology. Wireless remote so that you can literally pull a remote out and adjust various parts of the seat, which is magnificent. Wireless charging for your phone. iPad holder, as you said, cup holders and everything you could possibly imagine in a seat. Plus, Mogi has been ripping ass in it. So that is the ultimate price.

43:21Keyzie:It'll have a stench on it. Yeah, yeah.

43:23Mike Minogue:Lazy, 3483. Give it a text. The Hauraki Big Show. Weekdays from four on Radio Hauraki.

43:31Keyzie:ACDC there on the Radio Hauraki Big Show this Thursday evening. Now, fellas, as I mentioned in the TV chat, I didn't actually watch much TV last night because I was talking to my wife. And you know, fellas, you know when you sometimes get down to the nitty-gritty with your partner? Oh. I don't mean filth-wise. I mean, you can. It's weird that your mind jumped to that.

44:00Mike Minogue:And why would getting filthy with your partner be nitty and gritty? Well, I just. Like nits and then sand.

44:07Keyzie:It was just the look in Mogi's eyes that I just went, oh, he's gone there, and I'm going to have to put a disclaimer on this. and we were talking about our hopes and dreams. At your age? Well, exactly, Mogi. Exactly. And my wife was saying, if you can have anything you want, and be honest with me, it can be anything you want. Did she say this? Yes. That's great. What would it be? Forget what everyone else wants. Forget what everyone else wants to do. What do you want? Ree burger hat. Well, I've already got one of those, So, you know, I'm sort of sorted there. What do you mean to get rid of your cataracts?

44:45And I was like, are you serious?

44:49Keyzie:And she was like, yeah, I'd really like to know because you spend so much time thinking about what other people want. Do you? I didn't know that about you. You know, I want to know what my husband really wants. And it was like, okay, if I'm being honest, I want a motorbike.

45:11Mike Minogue:Oh, yeah. You want a motorbike? Yeah.

45:14Keyzie:Now, I know that probably comes as a surprise to you guys. I've got my stock cars. Don't you mean a motorhome? No, a motorbike, Moggy.

45:26Mike Minogue:So have you ever ridden a motorbike?

45:28Keyzie:Oh, yeah, I used to all the time. This was the thing. And then, you know, I had kids. When was that? When I was in my 20s. Yeah, we were in the dirty scrotes. The dirty scrotes and stuff.

45:37Mike Minogue:Oh, that was your bike gang.

45:38Keyzie:Yeah, and then I had kids. and then my wife was like, all right, enough with the motorbike. Right. Okay, this is crazy talk. Get rid of it. What was it?

45:48Mike Minogue:Yeah.

45:49Keyzie:A motorbike. No, I know, but what kind of bike was it?

45:52Mike Minogue:Are you listening, Keezy? 100%, but was it a Harley? Yeah, it was a Harley because it was part of the gang, remember?

45:57Keyzie:Yeah, yeah, yeah. We all rode Harleys, Keezy. Right, okay. And ever since then, you know, that's just been simmering away in the back of my mind. You know, God. Is it a longing? A longing, thank you. For the wide open road? Yes, with the wind in my hair. Oh. Well, you'd have a helmet on, wouldn't you? To feel the throb, not the way I ride, Keezy. You ride a league, okay. To feel the throb in my testicles again. Yes. The thrum, Keezy. The vibration. You wouldn't get that on your little tinker toy one, but, you know, a proper, powerful bastard. Yeah, right. And just hitting the open roads again.

46:34Keyzie:Yeah, right. What did she say? She was into it, man. She was like, that's hot. Yeah. Right, okay. So what are you going to get? Have you been doing any research? Because I can help you. I mean, what are you thinking? I'm thinking a Ducati Multistrad 1200. Oh. How do you pronounce that again? Multistrad. No, the first bit. Ducati. Yeah, yeah. Or Ducati, some people say.

46:57Mike Minogue:Right, so you're going to pivot from riding Harleys in a gang to an Italian sports bike.

47:03Keyzie:Totally, man. Well, I'm older, I'm wiser, I'm more sophisticated. It's all very well having a Harley back in the day and being rough and a bad boy, but this is stylish, elegant, and reflects my age, Keezy. You get to the point where you've just got a need for speed. That's right. And you can't get that, you know, it's that acceleration Keezy. That's what you're thirst for. It's the Italian design, and it's always been my fantasy, you know what I mean? Yes. Right. So, yeah.

47:32Mike Minogue:Far out.

47:32Keyzie:Okay, so when are you going to get one of them? Well, we're thinking, she said, well why don't we just make it your Christmas present?

47:38Mike Minogue:That's a good idea. So you're getting a Ducati for Christmas?

47:41Keyzie:Yes, a Maldi Strad 1200. Wow. And I was thinking, Keezy, you and I could hit the open road. It's just that you'll be bloody miles behind me, putting away. I'll be eating dust, yeah. You'll be eating my... How good is that? Yeah, man. So get yourself a Ducati for Christmas and a wheelchair for Boxing Day.

47:57Mike Minogue:The Hauraki Big Show with Jase, Mike and Keezy. Tune in weekdays at 4 on Radio Hauraki.

48:11Keyzie:Well, there you go, you mad bastards. That's the big show done and dusted this Thursday night. In the podcast outro today, we kept it relatively clean again, fellas. Yes.

48:21Mike Minogue:At the very start, we almost immediately had to do a disclaimer. Yes. But then we didn't. You guys freak out too much, man.

48:27Keyzie:I'm going to chill out, man. It's just that we know that look in your eyes, and we were like, oh, here we go. Mogi's going full filth. I'm just firing myself up, man.

48:38Mike Minogue:Yeah. Here's a clip of today's podcast. What is it? It's us discussing living large. I don't want your money. No.

48:46Keyzie:You just spend it, man. Go and spend it. Go around the world. Go do whatever.

48:50Mike Minogue:Yeah.

48:51Keyzie:But yeah.

48:52Mike Minogue:So this is what it is. Jase, go spend your money, man, because you've got so much. Like, you've got so much money. you could be renting the penthouse of the tallest tower in Auckland. F***ing hell, man. I mean, I know you get a bit weird when the truth sort of comes out about your immense wealth, James. Oh, money bags. But at the end of the day, you've worked relatively hard for that immense amount of money. You've had a hell of a lot of luck in your life. A huge amount of luck. Yeah, yeah. You're right, Phil. So just go spend it, man.

49:22Keyzie:Yeah, yeah.

49:22Mike Minogue:What's the point of sitting on millions of dollars?

49:24Keyzie:Yeah, that's true. I mean, you can't spend it when you're in the grave, can you? That's true, man. You know what I mean?

49:29Mike Minogue:And luckily you're only 39, so you've got plenty of time.

49:31Keyzie:Yeah, that's true. It's not too late for you, man. It's not too late. It's not too late. What are you doing tonight, Mogi? Ooh, good question. I don't know. I'm going to go and sit on the back deck with my missus, I think. Yeah, nice. I haven't had a beer this week, and I'm going to do that for another night, another no night of beers for old Mogi. Hey, Mogi, tomorrow should we have some beers, man? Absolutely.

49:54Mike Minogue:At Chasing the Fox, man. I am slightly concerned about ruining my weekend. and my career. But we'll give it a go. Nah, who cares, man? Yeah, that's a spirit, man. That's future mogies, probably. Hey, how bad could it go? Wow, probably pretty bad. No, it's all good, though. But we'll be responsible. That'll be sweet. We'll be responsible with our beers, though.

50:12Keyzie:Okay. Hey, Keezy. Hello. Is your wife home tonight?

50:16Mike Minogue:She just messaged saying she's having a few drinks in Ponsonby with the marketing girls. Oh, my God. But she'll be home soon. Would you like to go for a picnic? That's so weird, because there's no marketing girls where she works.

50:27Keyzie:No. You see what I'm saying? Yeah, I know, man, I know. No, sorry. She's lying through her teeth, man. I'm perfectly well aware of what's right in front of my eyes. The whole thing's a sham. I don't even know if she even exists anymore.

50:40Mike Minogue:We're all aware of what's in front of your eyes, Jase. Honk her. Am I right, fellas? What are you doing tonight, Jase?

50:48Keyzie:Well, actually, hang on, I haven't finished yet. What are you having for tea?

50:52Mike Minogue:Picnic.

50:53Keyzie:Oh, that's right.

50:53Mike Minogue:So we'll probably go get something in the area where we live, then go sit by the beach and eat it. Maybe some sort of kebab. I wouldn't mind a kebab. Kebab? Like a falafel, a kebab. You know, a Turkish number. Oh, yeah, nice.

51:06Keyzie:Yeah, sure, sure, sure, sure, sure.

51:07Mike Minogue:Jase? Yes? What are you doing, man?

51:09Keyzie:Well, I'm going to get the process started for buying my Ducati. Tonight. It's just the way it sounds like it starts with a J there. Ducati? Yeah.

51:22Mike Minogue:Also, and the way you're saying it too, it makes me think, and I know this isn't true, that you actually don't know anything about Ducatis.

51:28Keyzie:Oh, Ducati, yeah.

51:29Mike Minogue:Because all the people in New Zealand, it's probably Ducati in Italy.

51:31Keyzie:It is in Italy. That's why, because I've been watching docos on it. Right. Ducati docos. Yeah, yeah. So I'll be doing that amongst other things, eating some delicious food. Can't wait to hear about it tomorrow. Until tomorrow, we'll be broadcasting live from the Gulf. Take care out there, and we'll see you later.