FULL SHOW: We're getting old

15:01Keyzie:For a Kruskit I'm a museum curator Oh, man That is a massive backbone Yeah, you don't get many of them around, man Which museum, Willie? One of the ones in Dunedin Haven't seen you there lately Oh, you talk about the Is it the Settlers Museum? Yeah, that's right, yep Yeah, I love the Settlers Museum, man I've been in there a couple of times Bloody good

15:22Jase:Oh, every time we talk about it, you're always bagging. Bagging, yeah, you're always. You're saying could do with some decent curation around here, man. Oh, yeah, fellas, that was off air chat, man. That was off air chat. Willie, if you win, man, who will you bring with you? Well, I should really say my wife, but I'm going to have a bit of a predicament because my mate Rowan got on the draw the other day and he said he'd take me, so I better take my mate Rowan. Well, you can say, yeah, the trick is you can say you're going to take him, man, and then hopefully he wins and you don't have to worry about it.

15:46Jase:Yeah, yeah, yeah. Actually, let's.

15:48Keyzie:His back, you'll scratch mine. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Well, you sat on the line, Willie. Big Dilly will look after you. It's a good way of doing it, isn't it? Just get a whole bunch of mates. Yeah. You know, mind you, you've still got the same problem. Who do I take? You can only do pairs, man. You can only do pairs. Yeah. It's the only way it works. It's the only way it works, James, because it's two people. And those two people will be joining us at the Intercontinental Fiji Golf Resort and Spa, where white sand beaches meet world-class hospitality, playing a championship golf course, flying Fiji airways.

16:17That's in Fiji, by the way, where happiness comes naturally. Good stuff.

16:21Keyzie:Hey, fellas, do you think we need to get a bit of fake tan action happening before we go? I think so, man, honestly. I don't need it. I was in Europe and I've got a natural tan. That's where I'm going, brother. Why do you want to look fake tan?

16:33Jase:I just want to look really cool, man. I'll do it with you, man. Will you? I'll show you how it's done because I did it before Europe. Okay, sounds good. This is a tune, fellas. Rage.

16:45Keyzie:It is a tune. Turn it up. Turn it up. Turn it up. Take the power back, New Zealand. The Hauraki Big Show. Weekdays from four on Radio Hauraki. The police there on the Radio Hauraki Big Show this Thursday afternoon. The time is 4.51. Let's talk some TV. What's on the telly with Mike Minogue?

17:11Jase:Yeah. Yeah. Fellas, I haven't been watching TV because I'm sitting at home with my wife having a conversation while listening to tunes on my new stereo. I know. That's so good. Hey, guys, don't worry, it won't last. I know. The marriage. Yeah. That's good. What did you watch, Jase? Oh, how many buzzies out of five do you give that? Five buzies. Five out of five buzies so far. Good stuff. And what channel's that on? You can look through our windows. All our windows, you know, the blinds are up. Everybody's welcome to come round, man. So good. I recommend round. A bit boring. Probably seven until nine, maybe, having a glass of wine.

17:56Jase:Things really kick off after that.

17:58Keyzie:Yeah, sounds good, man. Sounds real good. I've got an apology to make. We've got the apology music there, Keezy. See, I mean, I know I probably... And I'm disgusted with myself. Oh, God. I'm ashamed. I was talking about a show on TVNZ Plus yesterday called Suspicious. Oh, yeah. That's not what it was called. Didn't feel right at the time, and I just went with it anyway. It's called Protection.

18:32Jase:Protection. Close enough, yeah. You always forget protection, eh?

18:41Jase:But you still just go with it anyway.

18:43Keyzie:Yeah, you just bust the four pins.

18:50Jase:So what is it called? Protection. Protection, yeah. And actually... And you don't rate it, eh? Nah. Protection. I don't. I don't rate it at all. You were saying never again. Never again, man. Well done on another apology without saying sorry, by the way. That's like the 10th one. It's unbelievable. Yeah. Do you want me to talk about the TV show I watched? Yeah, let's move on.

19:17Keyzie:Is it going to be some sort of real estate palaver? No, it's not. Last night I got home and I apologised to everyone. I used to say I was very tired. I had a terrible sleep and I felt quite low energy. Last night I got home, my wife was out until about 9.30. Wow. And I was like, boom, bachelor night. Monkey porn. Don't start the monkey porn yarn. Oh, Tony's on the filth. Yeah. Cool, cool, cool.

19:42Yeah, we'll get to it, will you? I'm just losing steam over here, man. No, I got home and I couldn't be bothered playing PlayStation or doing anything. I literally just binge watched a comedy, which I haven't done in ages, just lay on the couch, watched five straight episodes of a comedy. Highly recommend now. I love it. Tires. Tires on Netflix. Right. Okay, great. It's just, it's stupid. Like, it's just dumb. Yeah. But it's super entertaining. I was invested in the characters, watched the whole first season, and I'm excited to rip into the second season. Sweet. That's good enough for me. Thanks, Keezy.

20:13I give it, it's like a good three and a half buzzies out of five for just a first season, just mindless silly. Yeah. I could see myself watching it again at some stage.

20:23Keyzie:Beautiful. Yeah, it's great. I prefer something a bit more intellectual. I don't like sort of mindless. Faff. Yeah. Faff. Right. But anyway, that's great, Keezy. Three and a half pussies. Good stuff. Here's home! The Hauraki Big Show with Jase, Mike and Keezy. Tune in weekdays at four on Radio Hauraki. Yeah, welcome back, you massive backbones. Hope your Thursday's going along very nicely indeed. You're listening to The Big Show, brought to you by Reburger. Handcrafted burgers, loaded fries and gourmet eats. That'll change the game. Yum. Yum. Oh, that's so good. Thank you. Well, I shouldn't say thank you.

21:04Keyzie:Pugs. I mean, Pugs said all the work for it. Yeah, yeah, yeah. We should incidentally say that old Pugs is away at the moment. Yeah, he's away today, tomorrow, and Monday as well. He's moving house. He's moving in with his partner. It's a huge call.

21:19Jase:Especially, you know. What? Given how rocky it is. Yeah. I mean, moving in together is not going to solve a relationship any more than having a kid is going to solve the problems there, Keezy. So just take notes. Yeah, yeah. I mean... I was about to help you team up on Pugs there. And then it came back to me there. So, yeah, no, that's a good point, Moggy.

21:42Keyzie:Well, no, but Moggy's right. I mean, I don't want to use the word... This has nothing to do with you, Keezy. No. This has to do with Pugs. I don't want to use the phrase last ditch. Yes. But I'm going to. Last chance saloon. Yeah, yeah, sure. You can use that if you want. And often people in those situations will do drastic things like move in together in an attempt to sort of shore up the leaky boat. A band-aid? Putting a band-aid over it? Yeah. You know, oh, let's move in together. Maybe that'll stop us fighting. You know what I mean? That's what you were saying, eh, Jase? You guys did. Yeah, I...

22:19Keyzie:That's when my wife and I were really struggling. I said, hey, let's move in together and have four kids. That should take the pressure off. It was just constant Band-Aid after Band-Aid after Band-Aid with old hoity J there. So you don't mind Band-Aids, but just not protection? Well, as I say, I mean, I'm not really into protection.

22:41Jase:Projection? What the hell is projection? Oh, that's good stuff, fellas.

22:45Keyzie:No, I think, listen, let's be serious here for a second, fellas. Can you do some safe sex chat, man? Yes. Be safe, use protection, take responsibility. All right? Oh, sorry. You're being serious.

22:59Jase:I was being totally serious, Keezy. I agree. Do as I say, not as I do. Wise words from Hoody J. Hoody Jizbot. The Hauraki Big Show. Weekdays from four on Radio Hauraki.

23:14Keyzie:Yes, indeed. Green Day there on the Radio Hauraki Big Show this Thursday afternoon. The time is 5.15. Fellas, we've got some breaking news.

23:26This is breaking news. This is huge news out of the Paraparaumu area, Kapiti Coast. Yes. Kaitawa Reserve, there's a flying fox there. It's been there for 30 years. They're shutting it down because it's a health and safety risk now. They're saying flying foxes is too dangerous. It's huge news.

23:47Jase:Based on what? Well, it's based on a slew of injuries. A slew. It's someone getting quite seriously injured. But what they don't measure there So as soon as somebody gets hurt What happens Jase? Every bastard knows about it They don't measure how many people Had the time of their lives That's true Do they? There's no counter there going 8 ,000 kids loved it One kid couldn't hack it Shut it down I don't know if he couldn't hack it I think it actually No it sounds like he couldn't hack it But I think it actually snapped

24:18Keyzie:I remember at our school We had a flying fox It was awesome Yeah Because you'd stop at the end with the crisscross there. That's right. And it was like a flying fox slash catapult. Yes. So you'd go hooning down there on the flying fox. You'd stop at the end and it would fling you off. That's right. Into the ether about another, oh, I'd say a good 30, 40 metres.

24:42Jase:Yeah, absolutely. We had the same thing at the one that we used and it had an old tyre at the end of it. And that was it. There was no sort of slowing process. In the later ones, they had brakes on them so you could come to a gradual stop. Well, that removes all the fun. Yeah. Because the thing about a flying fox is you don't know where you're going to end up. Because when I used to go on a flying fox, I thought the fun part was like going down the hill. Is the fun part hitting the end at full speed? Well, it's trying to see how fast you can get and then seeing how far you can go. So it's like the triple jump or a long jump.

25:19Jase:It's like, man, this is just the sprint. and then the action really starts when I stop. Yeah, suddenly and abruptly. Right, I mean, it does sound very dangerous. I mean, I can see why they're shutting this one down. Well, no, it's not just that, but it teaches kids a whole bunch of different things, right? Grip strength. Yes. You need to learn to have bloody steel grip strength on those things. You don't want to let go. Yeah.

25:45Keyzie:We used to get catapulted. We had this thing at our school where we'd get catapulted And then we started putting twists and turns in there. Yes. You know, to see. And I think I did a quadruple twist, sort of six semi-half rolls,

26:02Jase:and then the de-douge landed on my feet. That was the best I ever got. Jase ended up doing a three-year run in Cirque du Soleil after that. I did, man. Really? Yeah. What were you landing on? Was there like a rubber area or something, like a soft landing area that they set up for it?

26:16Keyzie:No, it was the asphalt. Yeah, it was the asphalt. Right, wouldn't that really hurt? Well, I tell you what, it makes you get it right. And that's the thing, Keezy.

26:27Jase:Right. These kids aren't learning anything anymore. They never have a chance to get anything wrong. I get what you're saying. It's just that this particular one actually snapped. Yeah. It wasn't that the kid did anything wrong. It was just that it broke. Well, I complained about it. Just fix it. Get on with it. So you want the kid to fix it?

26:47Keyzie:It was actually funny because on one occasion on our Flying Fox at our school, it snapped. Yes. And the kid that was riding it just grabbed onto it like Tarzan and just hooped through the air and just... Did he make the noise? No, he didn't actually. He just instinctively knew what to do in that situation. I'm amazed you, as a kid, Kesey, you're allowed on a Flying Fox, given your fragility. Ah, well, I wouldn't have been allowed on those ones at your school, no. No. No, actually, the Flying Fox at my school was one where it was above you and you held on above you. Well, okay.

27:22Jase:Isn't that what a flying fox is? That's what a flying fox is, yeah, that's it. You're holding on to it like that.

27:26Keyzie:There is the ones where you can sit on them. Sit on it. No. You sit on the tire. Yeah, that's not legit. Oh, wow, okay. You've got to be hanging on for dear life. Yeah, for dear life, yeah. Right, okay, so what are you saying about this thing getting shut down and you're against it?

27:38Jase:Well, it's just more of this PC rubbish gone, you know. It's gone mad. It's gone mad, hasn't it? And I've had enough. I mean, some of my favourite broken limbs were as a result of being on a flying fox. Yeah. Well, I mean, I think that's what they're trying to stop.

27:52Keyzie:You don't get a face like this, Keezy, not doing a flying fox. I mean, they should shut all of them down then.

28:01Jase:You don't get a leaky bladder by playing it safe, Keezy. I don't want a leaky bladder, Mogi. Grow up. The Hauraki Beat Show with Jace, Mike and Keezy. Tune in weekdays at four on Radio Hauraki. The Big Show Swingers Club is back. And this time, it's going global. Bulla!

28:25Keyzie:Racism alert. Racism alert. You've got to stop setting that off, Jase. I'm just saying bulla, man. Racism alert. Racism alert. Can you say it please, Mogi? Bulla. No, it's fine It's literally like I'm not It's calibrated to just go off If someone says something That's really borderline racist And not okay Do it again, Jase Bulla Racism alert Racism alert Yeah, nah We've got to stop We've got to stop doing it Hey fellas Are you excited to go to Fiji, man? Stay at the Intercontinental Fiji Golf Resort and Spa?

29:02Jase:I am Totally, man I'm fizzing Are you going to wear shorts, Keezy? Me? Yeah I might wear Speedos, man Oh, man Yeah, because I wore Speedos in Europe, Jase. My Speedos is too small. I'm not going to wear Speedos.

29:15Keyzie:I'll wear shorts. Yeah? Yeah. You'll wear like boardies. My legs are getting building up a little bit because I'm doing so much walking and hills stuff. Don't worry about it, man. Who cares, man? Who cares? You guys will just mock me with a little bit of this. No, we've never mocked you about your legs, man.

29:27Jase:You're the best. You'll love you. You're J.R. number one best in the world, brother, with freaky bird legs.

29:35No, Jase, we love you, man. Yeah, yeah, sure. Yeah, man. Sure. Don't listen to Mogey. You know what he's like. Yeah.

29:41Keyzie:Should we go to the phone lines, fellas? Oh, that's right. G'day, Chris, you mad bastard. How's life? Buller, mate. Yeah, Buller, mate. What are your legs like, Chris? Jase. Jase. Racism alert. What are your legs like, Chris? Oh, mate, they can carry the keg around all day. I think they're all right. Yeah. Are you running the old keg on toothpick set up? Yeah, similar to that horse. Yeah, that's good, man. What do you do for a crust? Chris?

30:11Jase:Working warehousing. Oh, yeah. You're a backbone. You're a backbone.

30:15Keyzie:And you like a bit of a whack on the golf course, do you?

30:18Jase:Oh, I love slapping dimply balls. Yeah. I hear you, man. I hear you.

30:23Keyzie:And who would you take with you if you won? Probably one of the cellars. Yeah. Good on you, man. We're already going, man. Hopefully. Got him. Got him. Yeah. That's good stuff. Bit of chat there. All good, Chris. We'll chuck you in the drawer, mate. All right? Good luck. Cheers, Tony. Thanks. Okay, he's out. No, it's funny. G'day, Tom, you man bastard. How's life? G'day, followers. How you doing? Yeah, good, thanks, mate. Good day at work, was it, Tom?

30:49Jase:Yeah, it's been a good day at work.

30:51Keyzie:Yeah, good stuff, mate. Good to hear. What do you do for a crust?

30:54Jase:I don't know if I'm going to backbone our list, but marketing. Backbone! Yeah, mate, you're a backbone, mate. Don't worry about it.

31:02Keyzie:Yeah, not from me, it's not.

31:04Jase:What's wrong with marketing? My wife's feeling it. Well, the problem is Jase doesn't know what it means. Oh. I know exactly what it means. My wife does marketing. Do you, Jase? Do you, Jase? Yeah, do you, Jase? Yeah, I do. Explain marketing to us right now, Jase.

31:16Keyzie:What if my daughter is a very successful marketing person? Sure. All right? But what does she do? She does marketing.

31:26Keyzie:Hey, Tom, do you like a bit of golf, do you, mate?

31:30Jase:I do love a bit of golf. I'd love to play a lot more golf, but that's not happening at the moment with two young fellas. Yeah, I get you, I get you. I had a 20-year break because of kids.

31:39Keyzie:Do you have a handicap or anything like that?

31:41Jase:I'd like to say 36, so that's probably a bit outrageous.

31:44Keyzie:Okay, yeah, good. Good stuff, Tom. Will you stay on the line and old Big Dilly will take care of you as well, all right? Cheers, fellas. Good on you, mate. Good on you, mate. A couple of backbones there, fellas. They both sounded great. We are, of course, staying at the Intercontinental Fiji Golf Resort and Spa. It's all thanks to Tourism Fiji and also Fiji Airways. Yeah. As they said, going over there in the shoulder season, which is the less touristy time to go. But the weather's still amazing. 28 degrees. Are you kidding me? Can't bloody wait. I don't want anyone else cluttering up the golf course.

32:15Keyzie:You know what I mean?

32:16Jase:I want a free ride. Well, you don't want anyone getting hit in the head with your stray balls. To be fair, I think you're probably going to be the one hitting stray balls there, Moggy. Yeah, but not in the air. Oh, yeah, true. Getting hit in the ankle. The Hauraki Big Show with Jase, Mike and Keezy. Tune in weekdays at 4 on Radio Hodaki.

32:36Keyzie:Marcy Playground there on the Radio Hodaki Big Show this Thursday evening. The time, exactly 20 minutes to 6 o 'clock. Hey, guys, just quickly a bit of a reminder that if you'd like to win tickets, flights and accommodation down to the Dunedin Beer Fest, all you have to do is head to hodaki.co.nz, name our new beer that we've teamed up with Emerson Brewery. It's going to be called the Big Show Something. So name it, chuck your details in there. You and a mate could be coming down with us because we'll be doing a show from the Dunedin Beer Fest as well. That is on the 7th and 8th of November at Forsyth Bar Stadium.

33:08Tickets are available, dunedinbeerfest.co.nz. Yeah. All right, it's just a reminder on that. Fellas, I've got a bit of a business idea. We need like a business idea sting.

33:19Keyzie:We do because I have so many. Hang on, I'll try this one. Can you just say like big show business ideas, Jase? Big show business ideas.

33:32That's good, man.

33:33Jase:Yeah, it's like you on the first day of the job. Yeah. Why did I think this was a good idea? Okay. Try this on for size. Feel free to be open and honest with me, all right? Because I want criticism. Came to the right place. Preferably just about the product itself and nothing personal. The product is... The product is bibs. The idea is great, but what's up with that, Jack? Mogey. The idea is bibs for adults, right? Man bibs. Man bibs. Well, I don't want to be sexist about it, Jase. People of any gender can wear them. But yeah, man bibs. And what it is, it's a bib that you wear to a restaurant and you put it over your nice clothes and you eat your meal with it because I love noodles, for example.

34:27I love noodles. I'm slurping spicy saucy noodles, and I have ruined 10 shirts with the oil splatter stains on them. You love noodles? I love noodles.

34:37Keyzie:And they don't have in these particular restaurants like serviettes or things like that? Well, they do, but I don't want to be that guy that tucks in a serviette. You just look like you're about to really chow down on... So you'd rather chuck on a man bib? Well, the product will be cool. It'll be like, wow, stylish. So I don't know what the product's going to look like, but it'll be cool. What about if you go out, this is just a different idea on the same thing.

35:01Jase:Right. And you've got, you're wearing t-shirts, but they're like handy towels, right? Right. Not exactly the same fabric, slightly more t-shirty, something in between. And then when you spill stuff all over it, you just pull that layer off. You rip it off. And you've got a new, same, identical t-shirt underneath. That would be amazing. And then you get to the last one, and it's just cardboard, like inside the handy towel.

35:23Keyzie:Look, I think there's got some merit there, Keezy. Right. I don't know about you, but I'm shocking. And I'll eat my meal and then I'll look down and there's shit all over me. You're eating shit? There's food all over me. And your crumbs. And, you know, particularly chippy crumbs and stuff like that.

35:44Jase:I'm absolutely appalling.

35:46Keyzie:We're all appalling. And I am not opposed at all to like a backbone man bib.

35:51Jase:I'm always shoveling things in my gob. Backbone bib. You're always shoving things in your gob. I am. You're fisting them into your gob. I am, and my wife is just disgusted. Rightly so. I don't know what it is. But imagine. How come I can't eat? You're shoving stuff in your gob, right? Your wife's watching you, but you've got a man bib on.

36:13Keyzie:I've got a backbone bib on. A backbone bib on. How sexy is that? And the reason I want it to be a man bid, because I feel that women...

36:23Jase:Don't deserve... This will be insightful. Generally, are much more elegant eaters than men.

36:32Keyzie:They don't fist food into their faces like us men do. I've seen you eat a pizza, Keezy, and I was disgusted, and I'm a dude.

36:44Jase:Yeah, right. Tell you what, this idea for a business has given me another idea for a business, Kesey, that idea there, see? Yeah, right. Picture this. Right. Tony's noodles.

36:58Yeah, it's cool, man. It's a good business. It's just what? Me selling noodles. Oh, I wasn't thinking you. They're just in the name of the business. I thought I'd work there.

37:06Keyzie:I can see you behind the counter. They're stretching out noodles, Tony. I'll stretch your noodle, Jase. The Hauraki Big Show with Jace, Mike and Kesey. Tune in weekdays at four on Radio Hauraki. Pearl Jam there on the Radio Hauraki Big Show this Thursday evening. The time, 5.52. Hey, fellas, this time next week, actually, we're going to be down in beautiful Tauranga. Heard of it? Yes. I wouldn't say it was beautiful. What is beautiful? Mount Maunganui specifically. I'd say the mount was beautiful. Yeah, it's all part of the same area, though, isn't it? Well, it's not Tauranga. Tauranga. Mount Maunganui, we're going to be down there on the beach in a hot spring spa outside the Mount Maunganui Surf Club that is right in the main area of Mount Beach there.

37:54They've set up a hot spring spa for us. We're going to be broadcasting the show live from a spa pool.

37:59Jase:It's pretty good, isn't it? We get to experience all sorts of different things that so many people on this great green earth, Kese, don't get to experience. So having a spa specifically set up for us to be able to go and sit down and broadcast a radio show and talk to a whole string of backbones who have achieved greatness in their chosen professions, it's an absolute honour and there's no downside whatsoever. 100%, Mogi. Couldn't have said it better. It is, of course, to celebrate the fact that the Hot Spring Spa's T20 Black Clash in association with Wolfbrook is coming back and tickets are officially going to be on sale Wednesday next week from blackclash.co.nz.

38:40So if you hear us broadcasting, it is officially time to get over to blackclash.co.nz, get your tickets. It sells out every year. It's a freaking epic event. Even if you're only mildly into sport, not even cricket, you will have a bloody good time.

38:53Jase:Yeah, it's a great day out for the whole family or if you wanted to just take your mates and get a few beers in you. She gets pretty bloody rowdy. Yeah, she does. Put it this way, there's nothing else like it in New Zealand. sporting event. It used to be the Sevens, that's gone, this is a replacement.

39:08Keyzie:Your meat patty nips last year, or this year actually, wasn't it? Kesey sent the crowd into a frenzy. Oh, they were loving it, mate. You know, and fair enough. I might get them out again this year. It's confusing, isn't it? Because it's January next year, January 17th at Bay Oval under lights. Jeez, that seems like a long way away next year.

39:28Jase:There's a lot up in the air, man, but I'm bloody thrilled that that's one thing that is set and stuff. Yes, it's locked in. And we'll be in a hot tub again, I'd say, and I'd say you will have a chance to win, a chance to sit in that hot tub with us. But when we are broadcasting Wednesday next week, celebrating the tickets going on sale, we'll be joined in our hot tub. We'll have our Speedos on, Mike. Oh, yes. And then a couple of legends with Speedos on too will be joining us. Black Clash legends Neil Wagner, all right, and Kieran Reid. Oh, yes. They're going to be jumping in with us. Yes. And I've heard a rumour that the mayor of Tauranga, Mahi Drysdale's going to come down as well.

40:04Right, good stuff.

40:05Keyzie:Have you ever considered, like, nipple reduction, Keezy? Can we just focus on the Black Clash, Jase? Oh, sorry, no, I was just wondering. I could have really easily just asked a similar question about you and reduction, but I'm not going to. Good on you, man. We're also going to have Black Clash tickets up for grabs down on the main beach there, too. Oh, joking. The game is called Six on the Beach.

40:24Jase:Oh, yeah. If you come down and hit a six, you win the tickets. Do you get it, Jase?

40:30Keyzie:Yes. Six on the beach. But yes, Wednesday next week, the 17th of September, tickets officially go on sale, blackclash.co.nz, and you will hear us broadcasting from the Mount in a hot spring spa. Good stuff. Are you laughing because I stumbled over hot spring?

40:51Jase:Is that funny, is it? It doesn't take much, does it?

40:54Keyzie:Hey. What? Yeah. Plenty coming up after six. The Hauraki Big Show with Jace, Mike and Keezy. Tune in weekdays at four on Radio Hauraki. Yes, indeed. Welcome back, you massive backbones. You're listening to The Big Show brought to you by Reburger. Serving good times and good food. Dine in or take it away home. Yes, take it away home. With Reburger today. Yummy. Yum. Yum.

41:23Jase:Yum, yum, yum, yum, yum, yum, yum, yum.

41:28People like it. Sure do. That was just some of the reviews sent through by people.

41:35Keyzie:Actually, just thinking about Reeburger, I'm starving. What are you having for tea, Keezy? This is good chat. That's a good question. I always like to know whether I need to be jealous or not.

41:47Jase:I don't know what I'm having for dinner. Neither do I. Well, I think I'm having steak. Are you? Yeah, I've been asked to pick some up on the way home, but also she might do prawns instead. I'd go prawns, definitely. Yeah, I think I'm going to go the prawns. Yes, do. What about do it to get a little surf and turf? Surf and turf. Yeah, not bad, not bad. I hate that. I feel like you wouldn't like the idea of the seafood and the steak together. You're so right, Kees. We've never talked about it before. I'm surprised that you picked up on that. It's just based on you don't like fruit and stuff together.

42:16Yeah, that's right.

42:17Keyzie:I don't. Yeah. I don't. I might text my wife. I always get a bit nervous about that. Oh, yeah. Texting your wife? No, just about, you know, what's... Firstly, it seems presumptuous of me to assume she's going to cook dinner. Right. But you said that's... Don't. And secondly, you know, sometimes I invest a lot in what I'm going to be eating. And if it's not what I want...

42:45Jase:Yeah. It's bloody hell to pay down around your joint, eh? It bums me out on the way home. And it affects the show. Bones of cashews hitting the wall. I just messaged my wife saying, what's on the dinner? Yes. So I'll let you guys know what she says, right?

43:00Keyzie:Yeah, cool, man, cool. What tune are we going into here? Sounds like it might be a little bit of GNR. Do you know what that stands for? Guns.

43:11You can be mine.

43:15The Hauraki Big Show with Jase, Mike and Keezy. Tune in weekdays at 4 on Radio Hauraki.

43:21Keyzie:Ozzy Osbourne there on the Radio Hauraki big show this Thursday evening. Hey, fellas, do you want to get a bit of big deck energy going?

43:32Jase:Maybe not for myself but for others. Yeah. You know, I want to help other people get big D energy. I feel like you could use it though, man. Big D energy? I don't know, man. Big deck energy. Oh. Yeah, deck. Oh. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Because you don't have that huge of a deck, do you? Well, no, I don't, but it's also a little bit odd for me because it's a rental. Although I suppose it depends on what kind of things I could do to give myself big deck energy, Keezy. Well, for example, Moggy and Jase, you could go to tradetester.co.nz, man. That's what I was thinking, yeah. They'll make your deck great.

44:07I'm going to go there right now. Yeah, you go there right now, have a look at what you can get and make a little shopping cart up to the value of$2 ,500 and then head to hodakidi.co.nz, get in the draw with Big Deck Energy and we could be calling you tomorrow and saying, hey man, we're going to buy you all that stuff in that cart.

44:24Keyzie:Every Friday this month, in actual fact, that's going on thanks to the good bastards at Trade Tested. And how good, fellas, I do like a bit of deck action, you know, sitting out in a nice chair there, maybe the barbie sizzling away, having a few coldies, chatting with your chums or whatever. How good. At$2 ,500, you can get a fair amount of stuff for that. Do you like doing that? No, not really. But I mean, other people would. Yeah, people do. You've never, ever invited us round. Having said that, you know. Just a few chums over. It's interesting you say that, Kesey, because you've never invited me to your house.

44:58I don't have a deck.

44:59Keyzie:Yeah, well, neither do I. Yes, you've got three. Is there a reason why you get people over?

45:04Jase:Because you've got a deck? Yeah, come on, man. No, 100%. Like we go to yours, Mogey. Yeah, man. And we're outside. There was a pool party. Remember that amazing pool? And we're outside in the sun and it's great. You know, good summer vibes.

45:15Keyzie:I've got a small front deck. I mean, we could all just hang out there. What happened to your back deck? It's falling apart. Right. It's not safe to go on my back deck. Which one's north-facing? My front deck. Okay, so we could do a thing on your front deck. That's all good, man. Yeah, it's a little bit smaller than this. All right, I'll see you Sunday. Yeah, okay. Sunday, yeah. Yeah, you bring the meat, Keezy. Why don't we all just bring some stuff? Why do I just have to bring the meat? Well, I was going to say, Mogi, bring the beersies.

45:39Jase:No, I'll bring myself. You just bring yourself.

45:42Keyzie:Yeah, that's fine. Actually, could you bring some beersies too, Keezy? And meat. And some salads, maybe. What are you bringing? Do you have deck chairs and stuff? I'll provide the bread and butter and the sauce. Yeah, man, that sounds sick. Tradetester.co.nz, fill your card up, then go to hodaki.co.nz and enter the drawer, all right, and you can kit out your deck. Do you guys like Supergroove? Oh, yeah, kind of. The Hodaki Big Show with Jace, Mike, and Keezy. Tune in weekdays at 4. on Radio Hodaki. ACDC there on the Radio Hodaki. Big show this Thursday evening. And now, fellas, I'm still, you know, harbouring resentments about the accusations that were thrown my way specifically with regards to Zoe, who works as the producer on The Breakfast Show on this very station.

46:31Keyzie:Yeah, yeah. She had a new packet, apparently, because I don't know, of cruskits on her desk that was stolen. She was furious. and allegations actually weren't thrown specifically at me. They were thrown at the big show, who then my own mates, the fellas, turned on me and accused me of stealing them. Well, Jay, so that's right. So Zoe, for those listening that aren't aware, she was an intern like a month ago. So she's on not a heap of money, and she eats Cruskits just to get by. She asked everyone in the office, have you seen my Cruskits? No, no, no. Where did you leave them? They were on my desk.

47:07Overnight, they went missing. instantly put two and two together. The Big Show stole them, a.k.a. Jace stole them. Well, that's the thing.

47:14Jase:They put two and two together that the Big Show stole them, then we put two and two together that Jace stole them. Because Jace steals chips every day. Yes. Every day. Without fail. And seems to get off on it. Apparently, Brecky heard us discussing it, and there's been a new development in what they're calling Crusket Gate. There used to be some snack-a-ching-y chips out in the office in a special room. and he ate an entire box. I think that's what these crumbs are. I think there were 40 packets in a box and I think he ate an entire box himself. It got to the point where they were hidden. Then he found where they were hidden.

47:49Then there was a note put on, please don't eat these chips for a prime. Then they had to be moved again. He's since found them yet again.

47:57Jase:I've witnessed him commit a number of crimes over the years when it comes to this sort of stuff. That man is like a truffle dog for free food. He also thinks that if it's in the office, It's sent to him. Yeah. Anytime anything of mine has gone missing, might have even been my fault in misplacing it,

48:11Keyzie:everyone always goes, have you checked with Jay? Okay.

48:15Jase:So, Jay stole it.

48:17Keyzie:I am disgusted.

48:19Jase:Yeah.

48:20Keyzie:Because you thought you were being secretive about it. The fact that Zoe chipped in at the end there and, you know, put her two cents in about me as well. I thought Zoe and I were mates.

48:31Jase:Yeah, I know how you feel about when women give their opinion. You guys are mates, eh? What's her last name? Well, I don't know, man.

48:42Keyzie:But listen. Dude, how do you, so can you respond to? Look. Can you respond? I can respond to it very comfortably because I'm totally innocent of the charge. I had no idea of any Cruskits. I don't go rooting around on people's desks looking for food. I may occasionally, and let me make the point, steal a packet of chips. that my colleagues then two-fist into their own gobs. I don't either. Well, partaking in the crime.

49:13Jase:It's completely not true because Jase comes in and hummus them now. He won't even share them because we knock them out. But the reason why I believe that it wasn't you, Jase, is because why would you steal something so bland as a Crusket? Exactly. When there are, you know, an absolutely utopia of free chips that you could easily, just as easily steal. Access. Yeah, that's right. Exactly.

49:36Keyzie:And I've never been around that side of the office, by the way, to Zoe's desk. Can I say, I do want to support you, and I do agree with you, Moggy. However, I think at this point, Jase, it's the thrill of stealing stuff now.

49:49Jase:That's right. There is that. So you're saying I'm a klepto. You're a klepto. Right. But that's just, no, no, no, that's just the thought that's in my mind. I'm not saying you did do it. And from now on, I will back you up and say I don't think you did do it, but that's just something I'm worried about. It's something to be considered. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Is the most prolific thief, is it possible that he had something to do with the theft of food?

50:10Keyzie:Look, I can see people, you know, putting it all together and coming to me. I get it.

50:15Jase:Yeah.

50:16Keyzie:But I will say 100%, Zoe, I am innocent of the charge. The Hauraki Big Show. Weekdays from four on Radio Hauraki.

50:40Keyzie:Well, there you go, you mad bastards. That's a big show done and dusted for your Thursday night. Friday tomorrow, fellas. Who would have thought? Well, after Thursday. Yeah, exactly. This is crazy stuff. It is, man. Throbber. Throbber. Throbber. I haven't been here for a throbber in a while.

50:55Jase:No. Is that a staggy? Well, we had one last week, and Jase got yet another asterisk. We'll talk about that tomorrow. Yeah, I want to hear about this. Yeah, yeah. I heard it was terrible. That was a shocker. but we do need to come up with a theme, and I guess it's going to be something around finals, that footy feeling that we've got with the Warriors coming up over the weekend, something around champions, winners, losers, et cetera. Maybe it's just finals or just a song that represents your feelings towards the Waz. That's a bit esoteric, a bit vague. Yeah, that's a bit vague. It feels like a Kesey cop-out to me.

51:29Jase:Winners and losers sort of styles. Yes, I agree. Yeah, victory. A bit more specific.

51:33Keyzie:Otherwise you'd get real loose on it, Keezy. Oh, totally. What do you call another Keezy what? Special. No, that's, no. Anyway, we do a podcast outro. It's bonus content. You can find it every day, 7.30pm. It comes out by searching Hauraki Big Show. What's the clip today, man? Good question, Moggy. This one just says, phew. What's my wife saying to me now? Phew, she said. Phew. Phew. Who? P-H-E-W? W-H-E-W. That's like the Māori version. What? That's wrong. Yeah, it is wrong. I'm going to have her up about it. You should have her up about it. I'm on really sensitive ground with her at the moment, given the release of that video yesterday.

52:14Keyzie:Jase, was it the video? You always got a good sense of humour, mate. She does, but then she saw it again and went, actually.

52:19Jase:Yeah, too late. But it was too late by then.

52:22Keyzie:It was out on the ether. Yeah. It had something like 800 shares or something. Yeah. God almighty. Most of those were us. Yeah, most of that was Jase. It's Nadia me sharing my atrocity. Yeah, it's got Nadia Lim vibes all over it, actually, that one. No way, no way. Actually, I need to speak to Nadia because we were talking about an interview she did and she was talking about how traumatised she was by that notorious piece that I did back in the day. Did you think you having a chat to her about it will solve things? Well, I mean, I just wanted to know I've suffered too. Yeah. We've suffered together.

52:56Keyzie:Wow. But, I mean, it was kind of you doing the thing, though, wasn't it? Yeah, yeah, yeah. I mean, if there was a victim. Yeah. But she knew I was doing that thing. Yeah, sure. We should get her on for a chat about it.

53:09Jase:Yeah, why don't we do a one-hour special podcast on it? Good idea, Mokey. Okay. I'd listen to that.

53:14Keyzie:Hey, now, listen, make sure you check out the Instagram account. There's lots going on there. Check out the podcast. We'll be back same time, same place tomorrow, Friday. Till then, see you later. Bye.

53:27Thank you.