FULL SHOW: Wild Wildlife

7:38The Hauraki Big Show with Jase, Mike and Keezy. Tune in weekdays at four on Radio Hauraki.

7:44Keyzie:Queen there on the Radio Hauraki Big Show this Wednesday afternoon. A few people asking for a score update in the cricket. England currently 161 for seven. What over is that, Maggie? The 30th? 31st. 31st. 31st. So New Zealand on top at the moment.

7:59Mogey:Bloody good stuff, Jase. Also an update on the monkey, still at large. So if you do see it, 3483, give us a text. Fellas, over the weekend on the Saturday night, had the wedding on Friday down in Christchurch. That was a reasonable one, but things wrapped up at about 1am. And then on the following day, the day after, was an all-day affair at the pub, followed by going back to someone's house, the fellas from the wedding. Groove of about 15 of us, same fellas that were on the staggy. Yeah. And then having quite a large one. And at 1.30 a.m., I opened my phone and checked to see whether my wife was online in the old Messenger app.

8:35Mogey:Oh, yeah. It said she was active. So I just sent a thumbs-up emoji. And then she said, what are you doing? And then I said, was just thinking of leaving. Why, what are you doing? And she's like, oh, I'm in bed. I was like, oh, you don't want to come. Oh, yeah. and I was like, well, you don't want to come pick me up, do you? And now she was, they live way out in the WAP, so it was a half an hour drive at around 2 a.m. to come and pick me up. Unbelievably, she said yes. And when I, she's like, I'm outside. When I came out, I had two wasted dudes with me, and I was like, do you remember driving these fellas off on the way back?

9:14Mogey:So it was a shambles, right? I was taking the piss, and she was, to her credit, not super pissed off. She was just a bit like, man, you're annoying. I was just like, that's not normal, is it? Nah, there's something wrong with her. Yeah, there is. Cool. Here's the chillies. Nah, what? Like, you wouldn't do that for your partner, Jase?

9:31Keyzie:Oh, I would. Oh, would you? But in terms of her doing it for me, I wouldn't even bother asking.

9:37Jase:Yeah. It's not that I wouldn't bother asking, because I bet if I did, then she probably would, but I would never even consider dragging my wife out of bed for such a, you know, You've got to look at it. A man should stand on his own two feet. That's what you always told me, Jase. Yes. And, you know, I just think that's shocking.

9:58Mogey:Why don't you think it's that bad?

9:59Keyzie:And, I mean, to be fair, full kudos to your wife. And my wife actually would do the same. She'd pick me up? No, she certainly wouldn't pick you up.

10:09Mogey:Right, okay.

10:10Keyzie:She knows all about the midnight steamers. She'd be worried about an accident in the car. Yeah, right, okay. But anyway, that's why I say I wouldn't dare even ask. No. Right. Why are you scared of your wife? Can you imagine being fast asleep in your cocoon of the bed there and your painful husband going, Hey, darling, it's been a busy day.

10:34Mogey:That's not how I did it. I messaged her and she, to her credit, said yes. I guess I'm not scared of my wife. I'll float it with her.

10:40Jase:For me, it's not a matter of being scared of the response. My thing is I'm out here drinking booze, you know, acting like an absolute animal. My wife shouldn't be punished for my bad behaviour. She can just sleep. I'll go home.

10:56Mogey:Yeah.

10:56Jase:Sweet runner.

10:57Mogey:Yeah, cool, cool, cool. Well, I'm interested to know what the listeners, how they feel about it. If your partner texts you at 2am, would you drive half an hour to pick them up? Good question. And they're steamed. Give us a text, 3483. You can get yourself a$50 re-burger voucher. You can also call us on 800-HODAR. Yeah, great stuff, Keezy,

11:12Keyzie:because I'm thinking too that you would have had a snore on too when you got home. So she probably would have got up at 2 in the morning, picked you up, spent an hour getting you back home again, and the old Keezy chainsaw would have kicked into place as soon as you hit the sack.

11:27Mogey:100%. That's exactly what happened. Pretty sure I was ripping ass quite a bit as well. It was great. The Hauraki Big Show with Jace, Mike and Keezy. Tune in weekdays at 4 on Radio Hauraki.

11:38Keyzie:Oasis there on the Radio Hauraki Big Show this Wednesday. afternoon. The score is 165 for 9. So the Blackcaps dominating at the moment. And the English looking like they're on the verge of total collapse.

11:54Mogey:So good.

11:55Keyzie:After winning the first match. So that's good stuff, fellas.

11:57Jase:Hey, fellas, obviously we went to Fiji. We are going to stop banging on about it. I want to promise you that. But one of the things that I've been absolutely inundated with on the Instagram is people asking me, did Hoidi DJ, get on the darts. Now, you've been battling the cigarettes, Jase, for nigh on, you know, 39 years completely. On and off, on and off. You've been on the vape for about the last six months, I'd say, round about?

12:23Mogey:Yeah. Hanging off the back of it too. Yeah, hanging out of it. The douche flute.

12:27Jase:And what you were concerned about is going away on a boys' trip and me being over there smoking darts and that therefore being a, you risking going back onto the cigarettes. Now, to paint a little bit of a picture, I got into duty-free there, and I quickly found out that you can take a carton in. You can take a carton into Fiji. Unlike New Zealand, it's one packet of ciggies. That's your lot.

12:47Keyzie:Yeah.

12:48Jase:Now, I was over there for 10 days, I think, 9 or 10 days. I went a bit overboard. I ended up buying six packs, which is 120 darts. It seems like I started walking out of there. That's too many. But then I thought, oh, it's all good. Jase will get through half of these. He'll get through most of these, yeah. He'll get half of these. No doubt. And I guess, yeah, let's hear it from the man himself. How'd you go, mate? How's the willpower on old hoity jizzbok?

13:15Keyzie:Well, you know, fellas, first and foremost, I didn't even look at duty-free. Because there was a temptation there, you know, to get the cheap durries. Because I don't know if you guys know this, but I went to Vietnam this year, and I tell you, speaking of durries, they are cheap as chaps over there. Yeah. It's like two bucks a pack. Yeah. And I certainly take your point, Mogi, that, you know, when they're really cheap, it's very easy to get through them. Yeah. You know, and I noticed, too, that old Pugson there, he was hammering the bastards, wasn't he? He was. He was shocking. He did six in a row, I think.

13:55Keyzie:And old Keezy, even. Old Keezy was there, and he was hammering the way. Oh, yeah. He was a shocking bastard. You know what I mean? And I was thinking, boy, look, let's put it this way. fellas. I may as well have smoked the amount you fellas were smoking and all the smoky air around you.

14:12Mogey:Can I just say too, because there was one night in particular where Mogi started doing the Kramer, trying to drink a cocktail whilst having a dart out your mouth. And then I wanted to have a go at that. And then Pugs wanted to have a go at it as well. And that sort of started. And it was all happening all around you, wasn't it? Yes. And to be honest, Jase, when I came and visited you the next morning, I thought I smelt cigarette on you. Yeah, did you? No, I'm not even lying. I thought I smelt cigarette on you.

14:41Keyzie:Well, that actually doesn't surprise me, the amount that you fellas were punching back. Right, okay. I mean, the thing about cigarette smoke is it really permeates the clothes. Does it? You know what I mean? So you could be hanging out with a group of smokers, as I was, and it just soaks into those linens and pants and things like that. So, yeah, I'm not surprised you felt that way, Keezy.

15:07Jase:So let's just ask the question then. Did you smoke cigarettes while you were in Fiji? Or even one cigarette?

15:13Keyzie:Well, let's... Look, fellas. Fellas, look. Oh, my God, Jase. Let's be very clear here. I may as well have. But did you? I may as well have. You did.

15:28Jase:You're a shocking bastard. When was it? In the morning? In the morning, though. You stole one off old mogi there and you had one with a coffee, didn't you? Yes. You're a shocking bastard. The Hauraki Big Show. Weekdays from four on Radio Hauraki.

15:47Keyzie:Guns. Rose is there on the Radio Hauraki Big Show this Wednesday afternoon. England all out for 175, fellas. So pretty straightforward chase, I would think. Yeah. Was that on the TV? It was on the TV, yeah, yeah. What's on the telly? Mike Minogue.

16:12Yep.

16:13Keyzie:Yes. Yes. Yes. Yeah.

16:18Jase:I watched this show, a movie on Netflix called House of Dynamite. House of Dynamite. Directed by Catherine Bigelow, who won the Academy Award for Hurt Locker. Oh, European Gigolo. Eh? Nothing. and it's about a warhead, a nuclear warhead is launched from the Pacific, and the US government has to go into action to try and take this missile down. It's aimed at Chicago. Oh, wow. Can they take it down or can't they? Is it Chicago because it's got the biggest airport in America? I'll be honest, it never came up. Okay. Not specified. Yeah, okay. And it's referred to as a pressure cooker. It's got a good cast in it, none of whom I can remember at present.

17:11Jase:And obviously a very, very good director. I'll be honest with you, I went to sleep maybe an hour and a half or so into it. It's one of those ones where it tells the story from one person's point of view for about 20 minutes or 25 minutes, and then it switches to somebody else's point of view of the same event, something I hate.

17:30Mogey:Really?

17:31Jase:And, you know, it was mildly interesting. but my understanding is when the next day I asked my wife what happened at the end and she said nothing nothing so it's one of those things where you're excited like as a pressure cooker you need some kind of a resolution and the internet is alive with a conversation about what the F was that

17:54Mogey:so you open the pressure cooker and there's no food in there

17:59Jase:so on that note watch it, well made etc etc But if somebody gets disappointed by endings that suck, then probably not the film for you. How many buzzies out of five?

18:09Mogey:What I saw of it, I'd give it three. Three buzzies out of five, and that's on Netflix.

18:12Keyzie:Watched that two nights ago. Stopped halfway through. Good on you, mate. I just went, I'm not doing this. Yeah. And like you, I was like, okay, another perspective. Yes. Another perspective. Yes. Okay, can I have something? Give me something. Give me something here. And my wife and I were unanimous in saying, no, I'm done with it. Thank you. Two buzzies. But I watched...

18:35Mogey:Sorry, Jase was just on the TV behind you there, Mike.

18:37Keyzie:Oh, yes. On the old dick. Yeah, right. I thought it was funny in that. I watched The Salt Path with Gillian Anderson. Oh, Gillian. God, she's a good actor. And some other guy, I'll get his name in a sec. A couple lose their home, and it's based on a true story. A couple lose their home and later discover that the husband has been diagnosed with a terminal illness. as they embark on a year-long coastal track. Who's the husband? I'll tell you right now, Moggy. Jason Isaacs. Thank you. He's pretty good. Now, if you like those kind of movies where adversity, they've lost everything, it's based on a true story, and they go, I'll tell you what we'll do.

19:26Keyzie:Let's just walk. Let's just walk the coastal route there in England. and they do that and they have all sorts of dramas they have no money yeah

19:34Jase:he's got cancer

19:35Keyzie:but at the end of it at the end of it um some things are resolved I was gonna say are we just spoiling endings of everything we watch now um and I think and I was watching this thinking Kesey's wife would love this movie yeah is it a heart warmer yeah it is a heart warmer yeah she probably would

19:52Mogey:she loves that stuff um how many buzzies out of five

19:55Keyzie:look I'll give I'll be honest maybe 2.9 just fringing on three Buzzy. So not quite a recommendation. Not quite. And that was on Netflix. Prime, I think. Prime, and it was called The Salt Path. Yeah, that's right.

20:07Jase:Jason Isaacs, of course, he's the father in the latest season of White Lotus. Oh, yes.

20:13Keyzie:Yes. I actually thought he was Timothy Dalton initially. Yeah. They look quite similar, but carry on, Keezy.

20:19Mogey:Not really. We've kind of run out of time. Damn it. It's alright. I had some good stuff to say, though. Oh, damn it. You'll have to wait till tomorrow, man. It's like a pressure cooker in here. Here's the clash. The Hauraki Big Show with Jase, Mike and Keezy. Tune in weekdays at four on Radio Hauraki.

20:39Keyzie:Welcome back, you massive backbones. Hope you're getting through your Wednesday tickety-boo. You're listening to The Big Show, brought to you by Reburger.

20:47Mogey:Crave with your street food, freshly made with Reburger. Reburger. Hardly know her.

21:00You know, they hardly know that.

21:06Mogey:Great stuff, fellas. I feel like whenever there's just sort of nothing to say, you always say great stuff, fellas.

21:13Keyzie:Yeah, pretty much. Well, I mean, there is nothing to say. Those advertisements, I guess, would you call that an advertisement for eBurger? They speak for themselves. Totally. And they're actual vox pops of actual people. They are. whose voices have been disguised because they were taken without their knowledge.

21:34Mogey:That's right. Pugsman recorded someone at a stand-up gig bombing. But it was a joke about Rebugs. He was like, oh, yo, here's this for the show.

21:44Keyzie:Yeah, great stuff. Hey, now, coming up, fellas, I've got a question that I need. Something that happened to me today, and I need to figure out the protocol for it behind it. You know what I'm saying? I want your advice, what your thoughts are. In the meantime, let's get a bit of rage in us. The Hauraki Big Show, weekdays from four on Radio Hauraki. The Rolling Stones there on the Radio Hauraki Big Show this Wednesday afternoon. The time is 16 minutes past five o 'clock. The team's coming back out onto the field for the second innings of the second one day. If you haven't heard, England all out for 175.

22:19Jase:fellas this morning I was listening to Horeki Breakfast with Jerry Wells and Manaya Stewart shit it's good those guys get it however they did a segment about this talking well it's this tui that can speak English like a bird it can speak English it hangs out at Pukaha National Wildlife Centre and its name is Prince Tui Teka.

22:50Keyzie:I can see why they got into that.

22:51Jase:That's pretty good, isn't it? Yeah, that's funny. And there's this video on TikTok that is absolutely going off, apparently, and it's this mad bastard there, this Tui, Prince Tui Teka. He's up there and he can speak English. Right. So I was like, jeez, I'm going to stick around because I was teasing it, and I was quite busy at home. I had to get some things done, but I was like, jeez, I don't want to miss it, so I've got to stick around and listen. That's great radio right there. I know, they hooked me the bass. Put you in there, mate. Anyway, I stuck around. They finally played the audio of this thing, and you can't understand a goddamn thing that Tui was saying.

23:25Jase:Oh, really? So what are we doing? What a letdown. It's a bird that you can hear it chirping away there. I understand that bit. That's chirping. And then there's a bit where it sort of gargles. But it says you can't discern a single syllable of what's going on. Right. So I don't know why Jerry brought this piece of content to the table. I don't know why he bothered. Terrible radio. Shocking buzz. So you hung around. You got hooked. Got hooked.

23:53Keyzie:And then was massively disappointed.

23:55Jase:Exactly. And I guess my concern is that I'm going mad because I already know I'm going blind. Maybe I'm going deaf. So I wanted to play the audio for you guys. You tell me if you can hear anything in it. Okay.

24:04Mogey:All right. Here we go.

24:10Yeah, thanks. Easy.

24:32I see what you mean.

24:36Mogey:Totally. I couldn't make head or tail of that. It's like a bird and then just weird little grunts. It's not speaking English. No.

24:42Keyzie:Well, it was like it was taking a crap. Yes. You know what I mean?

24:46Mogey:Yeah.

24:46Keyzie:There was a... God... Just way to get deep inside my goat, that, because that's just a bird tweeting and grunting. That's right.

24:57Mogey:Yeah, exactly.

24:58Jase:They're making a mountain out of a molehill. Now, apparently what it's saying is, who said that? Who said that? It's saying, who said that?

25:07Mogey:I couldn't hear that at all. No, I didn't hear that. Can you play that again, man?

25:10Jase:Let's see, because listen out for it. Who said that?

25:13Mogey:Who said that? Okay, I'm listening. That's right. Easy.

25:24Big fish.

25:28Buggy.

25:34We better.

25:40Mogey:I didn't hear it say that once.

25:43Jase:No, back it if I heard that at all.

25:45Mogey:That is terrible content.

25:46Jase:Well, that's good. I'm not going mad then. That's important to me.

25:48Keyzie:No, you're certainly not going mad, and I'm disgusted at the breakfast show for just jumping on such a cheap load of crap. Yeah, that's garbage. You know what I'm saying? Chocking bastard. Well, maybe the listeners could hear something. Let us know on 3483. In the meantime, here's good shit. The Hauraki Big Show with Jase, Mike and Keezy. Tune in weekdays at 4 on Radio Hauraki. Yes, indeed. Kings of Leon there on the Radio Hauraki Big Show. this Wednesday afternoon. The time is 5.27. New Zealand won down with nothing on the ball at the moment in the second over. Now, fellas, I wanted to get your view on something that happened to me today.

26:27Keyzie:Just your thoughts, really. My daughter's boyfriend came over last night, stayed the night. Are you kidding me? No. Righto. You've got to get with the programme here, Mogies.

26:39Jase:Sounds like you're getting dominated, but all good. This isn't the thing we're discussing, right? No. Oh, OK. Okay.

26:45Keyzie:And then anyway, so we woke up this morning and my wife made me a coffee, even though it wasn't her turn. Right. And so then I had to go and do a read-through. My wife had to go to work. And then my daughter also was working this morning. And so off we all trotted. And then I got home at about midday, sort of one o 'clock, and I heard some noise in my daughter's room. and I thought, oh, my daughter's home from work because she works at a dog rescue place. So I knocked on her door and walked in. Lo and behold, the boyfriend was there but no one else. Right. And I went, how do I feel about that?

27:27Keyzie:Hang about. What's the protocol like? We've all gone. Yeah. But the boyfriend has stayed behind.

27:36Jase:Yeah, so you feel like he should have got up, you know, and it was leisure. Yes. You've got up, there's nobody home, take yourself back to your own house. Basically get out.

27:47Keyzie:How long have they been together for? Quite a long time.

27:50Jase:Right. Yeah, quite a long time. So he's part of the family, but you don't like him.

27:55Keyzie:Well, you know. Yeah, that's what I'm hearing. Hang on. He's an okay kid. Oh. You know what I mean? In terms of that age group, he's not a chatter. I mean, he is a chatter, but just not with us.

28:07Jase:Because you're saying off air. Oh, here we go. He's a shocking bastard.

28:11Keyzie:Yeah. But then I was thinking to myself, you know, what is the kind of protocol there? My instinct is, this is my instinct. This is what I would do in that situation is I'd go, I've got to get my ass out of here. Why? Yes. Well, just because, you know, everyone's gone. It's not my house. You know, I wasn't offended by it or upset by it, but I went, oh, it's just really interesting that you chose to stay. Oh, it sounds like it.

28:41Mogey:it's rubbed you up the wrong way. Yeah, because you say you're not offended by it, but you just go on the radio and call him a shocking bastard.

28:47Keyzie:Well, I mean, yeah, I did, but I was a little taken aback. Well, I mean, what would you do in that situation, Casey?

28:52Mogey:Well, the thing is, Jase, for example, my in-laws, I've been with my wife a long, long, long time. Yeah, and they still don't like him. They love me. And so, for example, I would have no problem at all just being at their house because I know that they don't mind me being there. Yeah. Whereas you personally obviously don't trust him, don't like him, don't want anything to do with him. Fellas, hang on here. Which is fine. No, hang on.

29:16Keyzie:Which is totally fine, Jase. I was just saying, look, he's a nice kid.

29:22Jase:See, that sounds like he's a shocking bastard.

29:27Keyzie:And I do trust him. I just went, is that all G? Yeah. Is that all G?

29:33Jase:Well, that's the thing. If he was a lovely kid and all that, you wouldn't even think about it. would you? You'd be like, hey, it's me old mate. You'd be in there high-fiving him. You know?

29:41Keyzie:I don't think we've ever high-fived, to be honest. See what I'm saying?

29:43Jase:And that's the thing. I don't like the vibe. I don't like the vibe this relationship's given off, to be honest. I'll put it to you this way, Jase. I wouldn't use my toothbrush tonight. All right? He's been in that house all day long. God knows what he's been up to. Because if you're right, and he is a shocking bastard, he's going to have some problems, man.

30:06Mogey:Yeah.

30:07Jase:Did we help, Jase? Yeah, thanks, Jase. The Hauraki Big Show with Jase, Mike and Kesey. Tune in weekdays at 4 on Radio Hauraki.

30:17Keyzie:Pearl Jam there on the Radio Hauraki Big Show this Wednesday afternoon. The time is 5.39. New Zealand 7 for 1. She looks tough going out there, fellas.

30:27Mogey:Certainly. They're playing at Hamilton, right?

30:29Keyzie:Yeah, at the Tron.

30:30Mogey:Yeah, yeah.

30:30Keyzie:Looks a dicey wicket.

30:32Mogey:Fellas, the Big Show have decided to, well, to be honest, following in Matt and Jerry's footsteps, which was, I believe they were the first show ever last year or the year before to record a podcast and put a podcast on vinyl. Yeah, it was a good few years ago, yeah. It was a few years ago.

30:47Keyzie:Yeah, it was quite a while ago.

30:48Mogey:And obviously a podcast is designed to be available whenever you want it. A vinyl, very old media. Putting the two together. Oh, it's madness. It's madness. Moggy, it is madness. However, we've done it. We've teamed up with our mates at Holiday Records and they've pressed a limited run of the Big Show's origin story available on a podcast. So it is the story, a deep dive into the history of Hoity J and Mogey, how they met, how old Keezy came into the frame, and then old Pug Sun came along as well, and how the Big Show came to be. Now, if you're a fan of the show or you know someone that is, these vinyls will be available to purchase this Friday.

31:28Mogey:You just have to text the word V-I-N-Y-L. That's vinyl. Oh, is that how you spell it? It's one of those words that people spell wrong all the time. Yes. V-I-N-Y-L to 3483, and we'll hit you with a link if you're interested. It's a limited run. Yep. So, you know, collector's edition or whatever. Yeah, get it in, yeah.

31:43Keyzie:I reckon in, like, five years' time, it'll sell for ten times what you bought it for. At least.

31:51Mogey:At least. Yeah, yeah, yeah, because people will still be like, wow, the big show.

31:54Keyzie:So even if you're not into the big show, it's a massive investment opportunity. It is.

31:59Mogey:I'm fighting the urge at the moment to get into the whole vinyl scene. Are you fighting the urge? Well, because it's just exactly something that I would be interested in. Is it? Because I've got my old trucks and I've got my old motorbike and stuff. I love old technology. Old clothes. Old clothes and old yarns.

32:17Keyzie:There is, you know, because I've just recently become a convert purely because my daughter's gone overseas and left her record player behind. There was a bit of a palaver setting her up, I've got to be honest, getting a new needle and all that sort of carry-on. Sorry, sorry. Okay, so you did have to get speakers? Yeah. And, you know, hooking it all up. I'm not – it'll amaze you guys to know I'm not great with technology. Yeah.

32:40Jase:Even technology from the 50s.

32:42Keyzie:Even technology from the 50s. But she is a rich sound. And I quite enjoy tapping away on my typewriter, put a little record on there in the sunroom, and good times had by all.

32:54Jase:Far out your – What you type on that typewriter? Red rum. Red rum.

32:59Mogey:Red rum. Because you had a record player though, right? Wasn't it one of those ones that had the big bronze horn on top of it? Yes, I did, Keith. And you used to crank the handle? He was always cranking it. You had to crank away.

33:11Keyzie:How did you call it the hog? And I actually really missed that bastard. Used to have it there in my flat. You missed cranking the hog in the flat, did you? Yeah, I did.

33:23Mogey:But yeah, text VITAL to 3483 to get the link. Soundgarden.

33:32The Hauraki Big Show with Jace, Mike and Keezy. Tune in weekdays at four on Radio Hauraki.

33:39Keyzie:You're welcome back, you massive backbones. You're listening to The Big Show brought to you by Reburger.

33:43Mogey:Crave-worthy street food freshly made with Reburger. Oh, yum. Yum. Oh, this is so good because it's Reburger. Yum. How's that? Nice and short to the point, fellas. Yeah, yeah. Do you like that?

33:56Keyzie:I bet you won't get any of that tofu crap in there.

33:58Mogey:They don't do tofu burgers, no, at Reburger. Because they're backbones. But there are vegetarian options.

34:04Keyzie:Yeah, there are, of course.

34:05Mogey:Yeah, yeah, of course. Tasty ones. So it's just tofu that you hate?

34:09Keyzie:Well, just, I don't hate tofu. It's just cooked in certain ways. Yeah, right, okay. You know what I'm saying? So like tofu on the barbecue? If it's marinated in something nice, maybe? A toasted sandwich with tofu in it? Oh, yum. Tofu soup? Oh, look, I don't mind a bit of floaty tofu in a soup. Or broth? Particularly if it's a spicy soup.

34:31Jase:You just gotta let it sit overnight to get the juice out.

34:33Mogey:Because you could boil a tofu carcass overnight and make a tofu broth. Yes. And then make a ramen, you know? That sounds yum.

34:44Keyzie:Incidentally, by the way, Kesey, what are you having for dinner tonight after your disgraceful curry last night. Oh, yeah.

34:49Mogey:That was two nights ago. Oh. Was it? Oh, no, that's what I was at. Yeah. Did you eat the leftovers? I did not. It's still in my fridge, and I have texted the wife and said, if you want, I will eat the boring, horrific leftover curry tonight. Put a little extra curry paste in it and make it yum. Sure. And she did that the other day. Apparently it helped fix it. And you can have the leftover noodles, which I made last night, which were delicious. Right, okay. So, yeah, it sounds like I'm having curry. Yeah, what about you?

35:18Jase:There's no tomorrow, man. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Mike, what are you having?

35:20Mogey:Please do. What are you having?

35:21Keyzie:I'm not sure. Because you've had about four meals since you've been here. Yeah, he's already had four meals, so he's well taken care of. Can I just say about 50 chocolates?

35:29Jase:Not chocolates, but certainly 50 lollies. I'm a shocker, man. Jase has eaten seven fruit bursts. I know. He's been piling them down his gut. It's been an absolute disgrace from you today, Hoyt.

35:41Keyzie:Well, just on that front, actually, I've been concerned about your kidney stones. We'll be getting into that next. Oh, we will. And I don't think eating lollies is going to help the situation, all right, just quietly. Tofu certainly bloody won't.

35:52Mogey:Yeah, Mogey, you're in trouble. The Hauraki Big Show with Jace, Mike and Kesey. Tune in weekdays at four on Radio Hauraki.

36:00Keyzie:Smashing pumpkins here on the Radio Hauraki Big Show this Wednesday evening. Now, before we left for Fiji, there was a bit of a medical situation, a medical drama with old Mogey, and that was that he'd been suffering from a bit of kidney pain for quite some time, So he decided to go and get it checked out, and they said, you've got kidney stones, you fool. That's right.

36:20Jase:That is right, Jason. All of this happened, and I've had kidney stones before, on one occasion about six years ago. Painful bastard it was. Yes, shocking. And I wasn't enjoying the prospect of being over in Fiji and suffering from such a medical episode again, if I could avoid it. The problem that I had was, by the time I had a suspicion of what it was, it was the Thursday afternoon before we flew on the Friday over to Fiji. Debacle.

36:51Mogey:Over to Fiji there. Jase, I swear to God, man, I've just unplugged the racism alarm.

36:55Jase:So I went in to the doctor there and they said, oh, we'll get you in for a scan. We'll see if we can see it in there, et cetera, all these things. Anyway, the long and the short of it was I couldn't get in. It was too late a notice. And he said the only thing he could do for me really was wish me all the best first and foremost. Oh, that's nice. And secondly, give me some suppository painkillers. And now suppository, of course, is a pill that you need to poke up the rectum there. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. Big pills. Big pills. Big bastards. And so I was a little bit... Anxious? Anxious is certainly one of the things I was feeling there, Jase.

37:39Jase:Thank you. And so on the plane we got and head over there and we sort of had a few beers pretty quick, responsibly of course. Yes. And then it wasn't until a day or so later I thought to myself, bloody hell, I'm feeling great guns here. And I think what had happened was I weeded out. So that's what happens is the pain that you feel when you've got kidney stones is it's when they're transiting between the kidney and the bladder. Yes, down the tubes. Through what's known as the ureta. Now, then there's a tube that takes the urine from the bladder out of the penile there. Right. And that's the urethra.

38:20Jase:So they're related but not the same.

38:22Mogey:Right, so it's the pain of the ureter. Yes. Not the urethra. Because I thought it was the opposite.

38:27Jase:No, that's right. So more often than not, once it makes its way into the bladder, it'll flow directly out of whatever you've got operating there. Yeah, whatever you're running. but very occasionally you'll have a massive stone that gets caught in your urethra and then you're in all sorts of trouble there. Now, of course, I managed to make my way all the way through the suppositories there. We had a few drinks on the Saturday night and the boys were absolutely hammering, Mogi, get out of the suppository. So everybody got a couple in them.

38:56Mogey:Yeah.

38:56Jase:And feeling pretty good. Yeah, man.

38:59Mogey:Yeah, it was great, yeah.

39:00Keyzie:I remember when I had a kidney stone back in the day and, you know, it went from the kidney to the, what was it, ureta? Down the ureta, yeah. And then it went out the urethra. Yeah. And that took like a week. Yeah. Such a long way to travel.

39:18Mogey:Jase, come on, man. We're having a serious medical chat about mogies downstairs here and you've made it about you not having a big penis.

39:25Keyzie:I'm just telling you what happened, feels.

39:28Mogey:So long story short, you don't have kidney stones anymore, mogie? Is that what you say? They're past. Yeah, that's right. Yeah, good, good. The Hauraki Big Show, weekdays from four on Radio Hauraki.

39:40Keyzie:Stereophonics there on the Radio Hauraki Big Show this Wednesday evening. Now, our good mates at Diamonds on Richmond have given us an$8 ,000 diamond engagement ring, which we want to give to some lucky bastard out there to propose to that special person in their life, fellas.

39:57Mogey:That's right. A lot of the entries coming through are both from the person that wants to propose and the person who wants to be proposed to. So it's an interesting competition.

40:07Jase:It is. And look, it's a special occasion. You only get to propose or be proposed to a couple of times in your life.

40:15Mogey:Yeah, well, some people I've heard even just once. Or five or six. Yeah, yeah, yeah. In your case, Jase, totally. And we've had a lot of entries in at hodaki.co.nz, 100 % anonymous, of course. We've got Anonymous on the line with us right now. Anonymous, how are you going this afternoon? Yeah, good day, fellas. Doing good, thanks.

40:34Keyzie:What a backbone. I can tell that already. Tell me, Anonymous, your situation and what you want to do about it. Well, me poor partner there, she's been hanging on for about seven years now and still no ring. So I thought, you know, now's the time.

40:50Jase:Jeez, you're a romantic bastard.

40:52Mogey:He is a romantic bastard. I do what I can. Yeah, right. So tell us about your lovely partner, man. She's grouse, eh? I love it. Which, hence the engagement. But we're actually off to *** for Christmas, New Year's, and I thought that'd be perfect. Oh, that is good. Very nice. Very nice. Just on that anonymous, if this was my partner, she would probably be thinking, oh, I wonder if he's going to propose to me in ***. Do you think your partner will be thinking that same thing? Oh, yeah. Yeah, I don't know. She might be dropping off by now.

41:30Jase:Yeah, that's the thing, man. They get to a certain point, and you'll know this, Jase, where they don't expect to be proposed to because they've brought her up so much and you've ignored her so much that they just sort of lose all hope. You can tell. There's that look in their eye. Yeah. I mean, yeah, nah, she's still good, but I just saw her doing it in front of a few million random people and s***.

41:50Mogey:Yeah, that'll be great. That'll be great, Anonymous. Well, I tell you what, mate, good luck. you are of course in the draw for this thing man we've got our fingers crossed for you alright thank you very much

41:58Jase:I've also got another idea man I mean Times Square in New York is bloody beautiful but what say man you're on your Jetstar flight heading over there and they bring down the little tray of lollies and in the tray of lollies you've got an$8 ,000 engagement ring yeah or maybe a little glass of wine or something oh there you go

42:17Mogey:or the tea or the coffee even

42:20Keyzie:have you guys ever heard such a romantic bastard Nah, man. You know what I'm saying? This guy gets it. He gets it big time.

42:27Mogey:She's a lucky, lucky lady. She certainly is. All right, good luck, Anonymous, mate. We'll chuck you over to Pugs. You're still in the draw. And for anyone else listening that wants to get themselves in the draw, hodaki.co.nz. Tell us about your relationship, and you can win that$8 ,000 diamond engagement ring, courtesy of Diamonds on Richmond, who make buying an engagement ring really easy. The Hodaki Big Show with Jace, Mike, and Keezy. Tune in weekdays at 4 on Radio Hodaki.

42:52Keyzie:Talking heads there on the radio. Hodaki, big show this Wednesday evening. Fellas, I suspect I'm losing my mind. Right. Now, I mentioned this a little while back because I saw it and it sort of took me aback a little. And I was like, what the hell's going on there? And what I'm referring to is I was going for a walk and I saw someone taking their cat for a walk. No.

43:13Mogey:Oh, hang on. So, and did that bug you? Yes. Sorry to hear that, man.

43:21Keyzie:Okay. Now, today, my wife and I were going for a walk our Wednesday morning. It's been bugging me. Sorry, just realised. That's fine, man. Actually, that bugged me. Did it? Yes. Oh, God, I'm going to play it again.

43:37Mogey:It's been bugging me.

43:42Keyzie:Doing our regular Wednesday morning walk. And I kid you not, three separate people with three separate cats on leads going for a walk. Now, listen, listen. Is this a new rage that I've missed out on? A new trend? A new trend that's going on? Because the other point that I will make, without a word of a lie, every one of those cats look completely terrified. One of them was like lying on the ground, just not moving, and they were trying to tug it along. What the hell is going on? Who walks a cat?

44:17Jase:Yeah, it happens. I used to see a little bit of it in Wellington when I was living down there on Oriental Parade. There's a fair few apartments around.

44:25Keyzie:Okay.

44:25Jase:And there was an old lady there who lived in one of the apartments and she had a big, white, fluffy cat and she would take it out on the lead. And the cat loved it because it was housebound all day except for this walk that it would get, probably about 15 minutes was its lot. Right. So it'd be rolling around in the grass like a dog. Idiot, you know. Yeah. So I think that's what it is. But that surprises me because out your way, it's not so much apartment buildings as slums.

44:50Keyzie:Yeah, slums and sort of overgrown lots and stuff. There's plenty of places for a cat to go. And, you know, my cat Jizz, she loves it. She goes out, catches 50 skinks a day. You know what I mean? And so I just can't get my head around it because, you know, cats are flighty, nasty little bastards. and the idea of putting them on a lead and taking them for a walk is just wrong to me. Can I ask you about the owners?

45:18Jase:Yes. What sort of age bracket are we looking at here for the owners? Older. Yes. Older? That would have been my guess.

45:24Keyzie:Predominantly. Because this is my philosophy on cats. You feed them, then they're on their own. You know what I'm saying? I'll feed them.

45:32Mogey:And that's their philosophy too.

45:33Keyzie:And you can go and do whatever the hell you want, just don't bother me. And they don't want anything to do with you. Well, generally cats don't. So this is why it's doing my head in. Yeah. And I just genuinely wondered, is there a thing going around now that cats walking is a thing?

45:47Jase:There are also people out there that keep their cats inside. My cousin, for example, she's on Waiheke. Yes. She keeps her cat indoors at all times because they don't want the cats to catch the native birds. But that's what they're there for. They love a native bird. Mate. Is there anything more beautiful than seeing a pukeko, you know, a keriru up in a tree. Tui. You know, with that native call, that distinctive native call, and then all of a sudden a cat comes flying out of nowhere and bang, you know. Yeah, claws right into the throat. Exactly, mate.

46:18Keyzie:And the great thing about cats is they bring them back. I've got a whole tarpa cloth of native bird feathers, and it's just all from the carcasses that jizz is called. The Hauraki Big Show with Jace, Mike and Keezy. Tune in weekdays at 4 on Radio Hauraki.

46:41Keyzie:Well, there you go, you mad bastards. That's the big show done and dusted for your Wednesday night. In the podcast outro today, what's the clip there, Keezy? The Day Ahead is the name of the clip.

46:53Mogey:Obviously, I was chatting about the day ahead.

46:55Jase:That's when Hoody J wakes up in the morning.

46:57Mogey:Oh, yeah. Here's a clip that comes out at 7.30 tonight.

47:01Keyzie:I don't know if you guys do this, but usually when I wake up in the morning, the first thing I need to do is process my day ahead.

47:07Mogey:Oh, do you? I thought you were going to say process your food from the day before.

47:10Keyzie:And I go, what's coming up today? Nothing. I...

47:18Keyzie:Very good. Very quick process, isn't it, Jase? It's a very quick process. Go and check out that podcast. We're very funny today. Yeah. Got to put your hat on. Some funny stuff going on there. Mogi, what's the plan tonight? Maybe go home, watch a bit of cricket? Go home, do a bit of work.

47:32Jase:Oh, yeah, I might watch some cricket, actually. That's a lovely idea. Yes. Of course, the ACC will be commentating this, so I'll have to hang out the back of that. I understand this evening it's Mike Lane, or Grot Lane as they call him because he's a filthy animal, Beck Sandys and Mash. I saw Minaya was in there. Oh, Minaya's in there as well, but he's just watching. Is he? Yes, he's Mash's apprentice. Oh, wow.

47:57Mogey:He could learn a lot.

47:58Jase:Learn a couple of tricks.

47:59Mogey:Yeah, it's good stuff. Yeah, what are you doing tonight, Keezy? I'm just trying to figure out with my wife what we do for dinner. So she's definitely going to have the leftover noodles. It's pretty late. I know. And I'm either going to have leftover curry from two nights ago, which was bad. No. Or make an omelette. And as you know, I'm my wife's little omelette king, so maybe I do that.

48:20Jase:Yeah.

48:20Mogey:There's lots of mushrooms at home and I want to use them up.

48:22Jase:I feel weird having eggs for dinner.

48:25Mogey:Do you? I do.

48:26Jase:Okay. I do.

48:27Keyzie:But it's fine for you. Occasionally I'll have a couple of poachies for dinner. What's a poachie? A poached egg.

48:33Mogey:Oh. Oh, sometimes I'll have scrambies.

48:37Keyzie:Sometimes I'll have boilies. Oh, yeah, nice. Sometimes I'll have fries. Yeah. Yeah, good stuff. Hey, now listen, make sure you check out the Instagram. Make sure you check out the podcast all tomorrow. See you later. Bye. Bye.

49:03you