OUTRO: Doing A Birthday Right

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0:16Keyzie:Yeah, man. What a way to start. A massive yawn. Hey, happy birthday, Keyzie. Thanks, man. Thank you. Way to be born, brother. How old are you? 34.

0:29Mike Minogue:You're just a baby. Jeez, man. No, I don't know, because... Yeah, a baby, man. I remember that. I love my 33rd birthday, but, jeez, things went pear-shaped at 34. 34, really?

0:37Keyzie:Yeah, that's when things started going downhill for me as well, actually. I think that's well known fact.

0:42Mike Minogue:When did you manage to stop it from going downhill?

0:43Keyzie:I haven't. Oh, right. Yeah, yeah. Yes, in free fall. It's just been a careening sort of downhill slide from there. From 34? From 34, yeah. So how long has that been? Pardon?

0:53Mike Minogue:How long has that been? Nine years, ten years, about. Oh, wow. Good day, man? Yeah. I don't really care about my birthday anymore. I think it's a 30-year-old. I like birthdays the older I get. Really? Yeah. See, I used to love my birthdays, but now I don't care. I never used to care, and then I started liking them. Wow.

1:11Keyzie:I've never really cared. But I've got the situation where my wife's big on birthdays.

1:16Mike Minogue:Right.

1:17Keyzie:You know, she's like plans presents and shit for bloody months in advance.

1:22Mike Minogue:That's nice.

1:23Keyzie:Has it all marked off on the calendar. Not for you, though. knows everyone's birthday apart from mine, it would seem. And then she's just like, it's probably because I'm like, oh, yeah, whatever, it doesn't really matter.

1:32Mike Minogue:Yeah, yeah, yeah. Well, it's quite funny because my wife got me a whole lot of gifts, which is really nice, and we were opening them today. And then there was one gift that I was expecting that she didn't get me. And I was like, and we were walking to this cafe. Oh, God, don't. You brought it up, did you? Yeah, 100%. Oh, no. No, no, we were walking to this cafe around the corner from our house, which is like our, for some reason, on your birthday, we go there for lunch. And it's just a regular shitty cafe. but it's a bit of a tradition anyway. We're walking there and I was just like, oh, she's like, oh, did you try and guess what presents I'd got you?

2:00Mike Minogue:I was like, yeah, although to be honest, there's one I think you were missing. And she's like, oh really, what? And then I said what it was. And she was just like, oh my God, I did order that. I don't know where it is. And she had ordered me this thing and she checked it and it was stuck in transit somewhere. She's like, I completely forgot I ordered that. Wow. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It was a lid for my Warriors drink bottle because she broke it. So like a$5 gift or something, right? But my limited edition WARS drink bottle, when we were in Europe. She dropped it and broke the lid and I was so gutted.

2:27Mike Minogue:And then, yeah. So I was like, I swear, I thought you were going to give me a new lid. She's like, oh my God, I did order you a new lid. I don't know where it is. Isn't it funny? The lamest of all the gifts. But it meant something to you the most, Gizzy. Well, that's why I brought it up because it was like a$5 gift, man. And she did not stick the landing. Pugsana has just delivered

2:43Keyzie:some of your birthday cake. I'm just going to sample it just to see if it's any good, man. I'm not too sure about it. Thanks, Pugs. It's cheesecake, which I think is a nice taste. It looked great.

2:51Mike Minogue:Really? I think it looks amazing. I'm only joking, man. What did you do today, Jase? You have a good one today, man? Lots of stuff today. Busy day. It was busy.

3:01Keyzie:Oh, it's good. Yeah, but no presents, though. I didn't get any presents.

3:05Mike Minogue:I don't expect presents from you guys. I don't expect presents from my parents anymore. My mum literally had the weekend.

3:09Keyzie:No, I mean presents from me. I didn't get any presents. Why would you get presents? I mean, and I didn't get you one either. I mean, I thought about it, but I think it's stuck in transit. Who does it? Yeah. That's what's going on there. Bloody transit. Bloody, especially when you're ordering, because it was from the Mediterranean. Oh, was it? Because you know how you guys were in Europe? Yeah. So I ordered something specifically from Europe for you, Keezy. And I ordered it when you went on your holiday. Oh. What was it? I'm not going to tell you. That would ruin the surprise. Like a truffle. So I was fuming yesterday.

3:47Keyzie:Yeah. You know, because you can track them, of course. I think it's in Luxembourg at the moment. Really? That's a weird way. Yeah, I know. From the Mediterranean. Why is it going to Luxembourg? That is so odd.

3:58Mike Minogue:Unbelievable. Yeah. The Hauraki Big Show, weekdays from four on Radio Hauraki. The Hauraki Big Show podcast. Yeah, but my mum was like, what do you want for your birthday? And I was like, I literally don't. You don't need anything. I don't want anything. I think that's the beauty of it. Just ends up clogging up your house. Well, when you turn, like, going to your 30s, a lot of people, if you've stuck on one career path, like I kind of have, when you get to your 30s, I've got a partner, I don't really want anything. No. When you're in your 20s, there's all the stuff you wanted. I'd take tickets for a gig or something like that, but I don't need anything.

4:34Mike Minogue:No. And so my mum was like, what restaurant are you going to for dinner tonight? Told her the one, so she's just, like, put money on the table or something.

4:39Keyzie:The only thing that I like to do on my birthday is maybe go out for dinner.

4:43Mike Minogue:100%, which is what we do. And that's all I... I make love.

4:46Keyzie:Oh, you know, if that's an option, Mogi. But I'm in that position now where I know what I'm getting for my birthday and Christmas from here till my death. Nothing. It'll be golf shit. Golf shit.

5:00Mike Minogue:You do? My wife watched the video of us playing golf and said, Jase needs golf pants.

5:04Keyzie:No, they're my waterproof pants. Oh, are they?

5:07Mike Minogue:Yes. Because she was like, yeah, Jase's pants are weird.

5:10Keyzie:They're just tracksuit pants, man.

5:12Mike Minogue:Yeah, 100%. She's talking shit about you, man. You hearing this? I know. Did you guys hear the show after five yesterday? What the hell?

5:19Keyzie:I'm going to have a word with you tonight.

5:21Mike Minogue:Yeah.

5:22Keyzie:Really lay it on the line.

5:24Mike Minogue:I was thinking we should do a bit on the radio where, Mo, you talk about your wife. Yes. And then we come in and talk about how weird and off-putting she is. Yeah, okay. And then we'll do the same for you, Jase. We'll just see how that... Jase is just busy eating. You can't eat on the podcast, Jase, man.

5:38Keyzie:My wife would be into that. She wouldn't mind. She'd be into it. She'd love it. Like in a weird way. Yeah, totally. She'd be into it in a really weird way.

5:46Mike Minogue:She's such a weird fish, eh?

5:49Keyzie:A funny fish. You see, the thing is with her, Kesey, she's been with me for so long now that nothing sort of gets through. What do you mean? Well, can you imagine living with me for 28 years? She's reached a point where it's just like nothing kind of bugs her anymore because, you know, she's had to live with me for 28 years. So, I mean, compared to that, what could really get on her nerves?

6:11Mike Minogue:Yeah, true, actually.

6:12Keyzie:That's true. I hadn't thought about it that way. Is this cheesecake or ice cream? It's very not cheesecake-y. Unless it's a frozen cheesecake? Yeah, it's a frozen Sarali cheesecake. Is that from the Mediterranean?