OUTRO: Ghosts and Covid.

0:00For all you mad bastards loving the Big Show podcast, get out of the even closer on Instagram, YouTube and TikTok or Raw Doggy. 4 to 7 every weekday on Radio Horeke. Oh g'day fellas. Backbone. Happy Easter. Yay!

0:19Keyzie:Well it's not really Happy Easter, Keyzie, because Easter's over. Easter's finished, man. I mean, you say Happy Easter before you go into Easter, not when it's done and dusted and it's pissing down outside and everyone's back at work feeling like shit.

0:33Mike Minogue:Is that you?

0:34Keyzie:No, I feel good. You love it, eh? I feel great. I'm in great nick.

0:37Mike Minogue:Fuck, I'm in good nick.

0:38Keyzie:Have you got new boots, JizzBot? No, I've had these for a while now. Oh, yeah.

0:42Mike Minogue:Yeah, yeah. One thing I like about Jase today is he's got wet hair. He's got wet hair and he got a new shirt. And he got a new shirt.

0:48Keyzie:Yeah, thank you for noticing, feels.

0:51Mike Minogue:It's still annoying him, though, isn't it? I was forced. That's why I'm going to keep doing it.

0:56Keyzie:I was, because this is kind of, oh, no, we had one really massively rainy day in town, but this is my first kind of rainy day walking to work. Oh, yeah. And I had my jacket on. I'll get a new shirt. I had my jacket on, and I went, this isn't going to cut it, fellas. I was getting very damp. So you got that weird umbrella. I went into Bed Bath & Beyond and bought it. Oh, my God. Of course that's where you bought it. Well, where else am I fucking getting it from? Anyone that sells them. And can I say, Keezy, it's a very solid umbrella, and it was half price. How much? $25. That's not bad. That's good.

1:30Keyzie:That's good. It's not the sort that's going to billow out when it's windy. Well, that happens to the best of you. Yeah. It's got wind. I've been surprised how windy it was up here. I've only used my umbrella once, and it did blow inside out, actually.

1:43Mike Minogue:Especially around this area. I don't know what it is, but when you leave this building, it's fucking a tunnel. Funnels. It's because of the – yeah.

1:48Keyzie:Yeah, it's funneling going on. They have to, when they're architects and city planners, when they're building buildings, they have to take into account the effect that the building will have on the wind and the wind level for pedestrians. I watched a really interesting thing about that same thing,

2:04Mike Minogue:about how Singapore nailed it because it rose up so quickly. They designed it perfectly so that all the buildings that popped up like funneled wind and did all this weird shit to keep the city green. It's amazing, isn't it? Things that you wouldn't even know people are thinking about. Wind ass.

2:18Keyzie:Speaking of cities, I've discovered, my wife and I discovered, we were talking about it the other day, Mogey, you know, the big IMAX, the big by Aotea Square there, which is just deserted now. It is. But you can actually walk through on the lower level through where we sort of walk, and so we did, and the sliding doors open, and it's the most extraordinary thing.

2:41Mike Minogue:Yeah, it's a dystopia.

2:43Keyzie:There's all these restaurants and it's literally like they've been abandoned mid-fucking service. So they're all closed? They've all got cages on them, right? But it's like there was an earthquake and everyone went, get out, get out. And now obviously it closed years ago. And there's all this gear in there. There's plates. There's bloody cups. There's glasses, bowls. Knives and forks and napkins. Yeah, all of that shit. And I'm going, how bizarre is that? Surely. I mean, okay, it's closed up, but you go and get all your shit out. It was out the back of COVID. Yeah, but it just seems weird that it's all been left in there.

3:24Keyzie:I think it's also ghosts. Maybe ghosts. Chase is happy with that. Hang on, what do you mean ghosts? Well, Chase is happy with that as a solution, not just COVID. Because that doesn't explain why the plates are still there.

3:34Mike Minogue:So they up and left, vanished. Yeah, it's X-Files. It's just very airy and odd. They've been tied up out the back in the kitchen. Maybe. That's where they'll be. They're skeletons now. They'll just be skeletons with cobwebs all over them. Because if those were your plates, you would have got your plates.

3:51Keyzie:But not just plates. Knives and forks. Kitchen gear.

3:56Mike Minogue:Expensive commercial kitchen gear.

3:58Keyzie:There was another place next to one of the teppanyaki restaurant that was like a computer place, and there's all these screens in there. Monitors, et cetera.

4:07Mike Minogue:And it's like, what the fuck?

4:10Keyzie:Why hasn't this been cleared out? I don't know. It's weird. And it's been years and years since it's been closed.

4:17Mike Minogue:Yeah. Maybe they don't give a fuck and it's worth about$100. Yeah, maybe. Fuck it.

4:22Keyzie:Yeah, I just can't be fucked.

4:23Mike Minogue:Especially things like monitors. They are out of, what's the word? You've lost your train of thought. What, because that hottie walk past? Absolutely not.

4:33Keyzie:They are out of. You're a shocker, Keezy. What is it? Come on, man. You're a happily married man. Look at you. You're all over the show, man. What the f - You got jizz on the brain. Come on. Come on, man. What are we even talking about? What day of the week is it?

4:46Mike Minogue:The monocers are too old now, basically. Yeah, yeah, yeah. They're out of date. I don't know. What do you call it there? They're - Expired. Have you seen a hottie as well, have you? No. People listening will know. They're - Redundant? Close. I know what you're trying to say We'll come back to that But anyway That's all I'm thinking about now I'm not her At all Oh, you're looking at her Not even at all It's just I was looking at him Fellas What? Just because you've got a new shirt doesn't mean you could yell at us It's just weird And it's eerie Can I just say We've talked about it a lot It's not that weird

5:27Keyzie:I just don't understand I get that you don't understand it I'm with you I've heard you I see an opportunity Fellas For what? For what?

5:35Mike Minogue:To get free dishes.

5:36Keyzie:The Big Show. Obsolete. The Big Show.

5:40Mike Minogue:Famous. It's obsolete. Obsolete is the word. Thank you. The Hauraki Big Show. Weekdays from four on Radio Hauraki. The Hauraki Big Show podcast. The Big Show food hall. Sure. We buy the whole thing. We buy a floor. Do some more work. And just. I think he'll do the sort of behind the scenes stuff. Open the food hall. You guys show up on opening night.

6:05Keyzie:And Keezy, you'd be good with that because you love your food halls, you love your curries, and you love your –

6:10Mike Minogue:What store would I open? Because I think if I had to open, I think I would do some sort of pizzeria. Yes. I love pizza. Because you've got that weird Italian moustache. You go, hey, look at Luigi. Well, that was racist. Sorry to any Italians. No, I don't know if it is racist.

6:28Keyzie:You'd just sell ham and pineapple. It would be me. That's just one pizza.

6:33Mike Minogue:One pizza, frozen McCain's. They have to fit in a microwave. In a microwave oven. And they'd be like, what would you like? Look at the menu, it's like, McCain's ham and pineapple,$6.80. And what's the drink? A giant 2.25 bottle of Fanta. Nice. And I just tip that into small plastic. Do people...

6:51Keyzie:I've never... I don't get the whole 2.25 thing. It's just too much. It's weird, it's really airy. It's too much. Yeah, there's something creepy about it. I reckon it's ghosts. Just don't be animals about it. Just get a small drink. Well, it's for the farmer, isn't it? But it used to be, when we were growing up, it used to be, you used to have your 1.25, Jase. Yes. Didn't you? And you had your two litres.

7:10Mike Minogue:1.5? That's right. They've changed it. They've increased it. They're fattening you up.

7:15Keyzie:And interestingly, you'll often find. Oh, that reminds me. You'll often find, fellas, that the 1.5 litre is more expensive than the 2 litre. Well, that's where you've got to go down to your mills and see how they measure it, don't you, in the supermarket there. Yes. Oh, your cost per mill. It's like your cost per sheet on your shit paper, you know?