OUTRO: LINE!

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0:15Keyzie:That's correct. Ha ha! Hi Fielce.

0:22Hi. Here he is. How'd your golf go today Fielce?

0:26Keyzie:I went okay. Poor old Keezy, eh? Keezy. No good, man. It was a shocker. Yeah, was it? And, like, we both have shockers, Mogi. Yeah. We have shockers on and off throughout the round. I've never heard one of you say, yeah, we're good. Not once. That's right. Shocker every time. That's golf. That's golf, baby. But Keezy had a shocker the entire round. and I have a belief that he's now exploded on the course and the next time he plays, he's going to rise like a phoenix from the ashes and play the best he's – it was the end of his golf career today and I think he's going to become back a new man.

1:12Mike Minogue:What do you mean the end of my golf career? Well, I just feel like – It almost was.

1:15Keyzie:It was so shocking that I think the next time you play, you're going to be really good. I'll put 10 bucks on it. I love the way you guys support each other. Okay, can you put$10 on them? I will, I will. Okay, have you got$10? I'm not in cash, but I'll get your account details, Keezy. I'm picking definitely sub-hundy.

1:33Mike Minogue:You reckon? Yes. Like on a regular course. What did you actually hit? Oh, no, I stopped scoring. It was that bad. I lost 11 balls, which is fucked. You like that? Yeah, I love it. And so I got to the point where, because it was a beautiful day, beautiful course and a good walk, and so in order to keep myself going around for the full 18 with Jase, I just had to stop and just started practicing.

2:01Keyzie:That's the one, man. Mogi in the back nine, just to finish this chat off. Oh, please don't finish it. On the back nine, the first six holes of the back nine, I bogeyed. All of them. And then I shat the bed in the last three holes. Yeah, right. Well, the last, yeah. But it was a beautiful day It's good exercise And we're tanned and refreshed from it Aren't we Keezy?

2:25Mike Minogue:It's good for the soul man It doesn't seem like it You seem really like You're fucking fuming there Keezy man No not fuming Just gassed Just tired I realised I think And I've got a quiet weekend this week And I think I do just need to Fucking stop drinking piss and shit Just chill out for a while Just quit drinking man Just for one weekend No I'm not going to do the old mogy I'm off the piss Then I'm on the piss I'm just going to have a weekend off and then back into it. Yeah, right. That's the spirit, man.

2:50Keyzie:And it's actually looking like it's going to be beautiful weather this weekend, so it's a perfect opportunity to – Jeez, it's a good weekend for drinking, Keezy, when the sun's out, brother. Well, there is that. There is that.

3:00Mike Minogue:Nah, made up my mind. My wife was like, so what night? Because I was like, we'll have a nice night in. We'll make some – we've got leftover pasta from Tuscany still, and we do this thing where we go to the fancy supermarket and buy really nice cheese and stuff and then have like a nice little evening and then watch a movie. She's like what night are we going to do that And I was like let's do it Saturday And then she's like yeah but you'll probably get a better offer And like go to the pub or something And I was like fucking what Yeah that sounds like you man I never do that You're my wife I love you You're my best pal What movie are you going to watch 10 minutes of We don't do that we watch the whole thing Yeah I don't know some fucking something that's not Terrible Go and

3:44Keyzie:Do the salt path You know what you should watch man? Tin Cup. Look at this fucking face. What is it?

3:52Mike Minogue:Tin what? Tin Cup. Tin Cup. You don't know Tin Cup. What's Tin Cup? Tin Cup's a golf movie, man. Right, okay. Starring Kevin Costner. Right. Don Johnson. Oh, wow, so like Rene Russo. No, late 90s. Late 90s. Yep. Right. Maybe 97 I'm going to go with. One of the great romantic comedies. Right. One of the great underdog yarns. Right. Magnificent. So Tin Cup, Kevin Costner, he's he's a golf course, what do you call them? He's the course pro. Green keeper. No, he's the course pro. Oh, yeah. And he lives in a trailer on the golf course, and he teaches wives of rich men how to play golf, and he sort of bangs them all.

4:35That's Hoody J's dream job. And his former nemesis is Don Johnson, who is a professional golf player and the PGA comes to town. Oh, right. And he somehow, I think he needs money for whatever, you know how it goes. And old Tin Cup there, Kevin Costner, he manages to get a wild card. Right. While also trying to bang Rene Russo, who's Don Johnson's missus.

5:02Mike Minogue:Nice. Absolutely magnificent. Is it? It is a great film.

5:08Keyzie:I've never heard of it. No, neither, I don't think. It is a great sports movie. Kevin Costner, the king of the sports movies. Absolute king of the sports movies. And it's Cheech Mariners' best friend. It is just funny, brilliantly acted, brilliantly written, just a great yarn. He's quite good, Kevin Costner. Very good. So is Dylan Johnson. I watched that series Yellowstone. Oh, yeah. The first two, and then it got stupid, as they always do when they go on for about eight series. He was bloody great in that. Yeah, he's a very, very good actor, that fella. And my wife even said, God, he's a good-looking fella, isn't he?

5:46Keyzie:Still got it. He's still looking pretty hot.

5:49Mike Minogue:So is he in For the Love of the Game? He is. I've never heard of that. The Legend of Bag of Vance I've heard of. That's Will Smith, right? That's Will Smith, yeah. Is he in that? Nah.

6:00Keyzie:Ten Cup, I might watch that over the weekend, Moogie. Very, very good, mate. I don't think you'll regret it. You get some good laughs out of it. You know, he's crushing beers. He's a down-and-out loser, man. Yes. All he needs is a love of a good woman. Yes. You know, just to amuse, somebody to inspire him to success. Yes.

6:17Mike Minogue:Right, so he's in draft day. Yep. For the love. Ball Durham. For love of the game. Ball Durham. Yeah, I've never heard of any of these games. I've heard of Waterworld. Oh, that's good. That was a shocker, wasn't it? He's also in Field of Dreams. Field of Dreams, I've heard of. One of the great baseball sports movies, Bull Durham, Tin Cup, American Flyers, which is a cycling film. Right. Yeah, man. I've never heard of any, or I've heard of If You Build It, They Will Come. They're a little bit before your time. Yeah. The Hauraki Big Show, weekdays from four on Radio Hauraki.

6:55Keyzie:The Hauraki Big Show podcast.

6:57Mike Minogue:Because for me, it was very much Mighty Ducks and Remember the Titans. Sure. Were the big ones. and odd. What's the one with, is it Al Pacino?

7:08Keyzie:Oh, yeah.

7:09Mike Minogue:Any given Sunday. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

7:12Keyzie:One of the great scenes. I love that scene where he's giving the fellas a pep talk and he's talking about how fucked he is. But you know what I mean? He's like, but come on, fellas. Pick yourselves up off the carpet. One of the great, you know, psych-up speeches you'll ever watch. Fuck yeah. Have you got one for us now, Keezy? A movie? A psych-up.

7:38Mike Minogue:Nah, I ain't got shit today. I could use one, though. Come on, man.

7:42Keyzie:Well, fellas, look. As you say, you've got a really nice weekend to look forward to, Keezy. You've got a nice little weekend plan. The weather's looking beautiful. The weather's looking beautiful. Yeah. I'll be learning lines all weekend. I've just been in denial about it. Right. You know how you go, oh, that's right, because it starts filming on Tuesday. And you're quite a major role, eh? In this particular episode. And it's like, at some stage, I'm going to have to commit to learning the lines. Yeah. How many pages?

8:12Mike Minogue:I don't know. A lot. Right, okay.

8:14Keyzie:Do you ever forget them? And my memory is certainly not what it used to be, that's for sure.

8:20Mike Minogue:Backbone. He is a backbone. Do you ever, because you obviously have learnt a lot of lines, once you've done your scene, do they just fall out of your head? like once you've recorded it and it's done, boom, they're gone, like the next day?

8:30Keyzie:Oh, no, they'll sit around in there. If you ask me them the next day, I'd probably still know them. Right, okay.

8:36Mike Minogue:Yeah, but generally, you know, you let them go. Yeah, right, because I can't even remember the lines I did for an audition and it was two sentences. I can't remember what they were. Yeah, yeah. Well, you kept on buggering up the last one, didn't you? To be fair, I couldn't even remember on the day. Yeah. Let alone like a month later. Fuck, I suck at acting. No, you don't. It's line, remembering lines. Remembering lines.

9:00Keyzie:I used to be good at it. I'm not very good anymore. I have to do it way, way more than I used to. I'm the best in the world. I have to do it just over and over and over again.

9:10Mike Minogue:Do you ever improv on whatever show you've got on next week? No. No? They don't let you improv? No. Okay. Because that would fuck everything up, eh?

9:19Keyzie:You can chuck in the odd words, perhaps, but no improv. Yeah, right. We've got to get it and move on, eh? Well, very much so. It's a two-hour episode, so just get on with it, fellas.

9:32Mike Minogue:I've heard that that's what Shortland Street's like, is you'll like half fuck it up and then go, oh, shit, can we do that? And then they'll be like, okay, cool, we got it, moving on. As long as you can say the words right, that's it. That's it.

9:45Keyzie:It is a great training ground, Shortland Street, for actors because it's like get in there, get it done, fuck off. Maybe I should go on Shortland Street. That's a good idea. But it's also a lot of pressure.

9:57Mike Minogue:Right. Oh, because, yeah, right. They can't be wasting time. Yeah. I don't actually, no, I don't want to go on Shortland Street because I don't want to remember lines. Fuck that.

10:06Keyzie:And all the cameras are synced to your lines. So if the lines go out of whack, there's like four cameras in there. And they're live cutting it to save time. Yes. And so if you fuck it up, then the whole system goes and shits itself. Like that. That is crazy.

10:24Mike Minogue:It is crazy. So they live edit it so that they don't have to have an editor and then they'll just tidy it up later. That is fucked. Jase just shrugged his shoulders. I don't know.