OUTRO: Market Yourself

0:00Keyzie:Keyzie and Mogi Drive. For all you mad bastards loving the Big Show podcast, get up even closer on Instagram, YouTube and TikTok or Raw Dog It. 4 to 7 every weekday on Radio Horete. Oh, g'day fellas.

0:21Mike Minogue:Backbone. Hello. No Mogi today. No. His voice issue has gotten worse and he's now on antibiotics. Yes. Yes.

0:29Keyzie:His nasal passages are deeply inflamed and filling up as we speak with pus. It's disgusting, isn't it? Have you caught it as well? No. What do you mean, man?

0:40Mike Minogue:Oh, I'm just looking at your nasal passages. Pugs, you don't have a big nose. You can't make these jokes. That's the rule of the big show.

0:47Keyzie:Wow, okay. Okay, we're starting off there, are we? What were you guys saying just before we started? Daring me. No, no, no.

0:54Mike Minogue:You're allowed to make nose jokes if you've got a big nose. That's why it's funny. All right. Whereas if we were just picking on people's physical defects whilst we didn't have them, you know what I mean?

1:04Jason Hoyte:I'm pretty sure it's still funny when I say it. And you can tell whenever we go on live shows and people have a go at you about your honkers, it's still funny to them.

1:12Mike Minogue:But the reason why it's got so much life on our show is because all three of us can do it. Sure. And we're all throwing stones inside our own glass houses, which is quite funny. Yeah. Especially Jase has got a massive stone. Glad we got into the semantics of the ethics of honker jokes.

1:27Keyzie:Well, I mean, let's focus on Pugs' nose for a second there with his little nose ring. Yeah. Have you ever noticed, you know, the other day when he had a bit of a cold going on, the bubbles coming out of the ring? The side of the nose ring. Yeah, yeah, yeah. So he talks about noses, Pugs' son. Yeah, bubble ring.

1:47Mike Minogue:Bubble ring. Old bubble ring, Pugs. No, the reason he's got it, though, is because he used to dig around in the garden and make a mess. And so you put a ring on him and then he can't dig anymore because it hurts.

1:58Jason Hoyte:I actually consider getting rid of the nose piercing now that I'm 30 years old.

2:01Keyzie:Yeah, I mean, it's...

2:02Jason Hoyte:I don't think you have to. But my partner said, no, keep it. I think it's cool. And so I'm keeping it.

2:07Keyzie:I mean, it's one of those sort of sad stories, isn't it? I don't know if sad is the word I'd use, but yeah. You know, back in the day, obviously, it was pretty cool, Keezy. He went, oh, Pugs-Han's got to get a nose ring. And it was like, yeah, high five, Pugs-Han. Yeah, yeah. But, you know, 10 years on, it's a bit dated. It's a bit old, you know, it's like...

2:27Mike Minogue:I think it's actually youth. It makes Pugs look youthful. And you see, he was like, I'm 30 now. I should take it out. And his younger partner was like, no, no, leave it in. I don't need any of my friends figuring out that you're 30. She'll tack on to the fact that I'm 30 years old. What you should do is get rid of the nose ring and get a cheese cutter and just lean into old age.

2:48Jason Hoyte:Have I got news for you? You've got one. I've got both.

2:51Mike Minogue:But wear it forwards, not backwards. Yeah, totally, man.

2:54Jason Hoyte:My mate who's 33 runs the cheese cutter Fords, actually. Oh, really? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Oh, what's his name? The barber, Liam. Liam, yeah. Yeah, he looks great.

3:03Keyzie:Well, I think I could credit myself.

3:07Jason Hoyte:Yeah, he puts his hand up to everyone.

3:09Keyzie:I was probably the leader of that because back in the day I used to wear the cheese cutter. And then all the commentators on Sky Cricket started wearing cheese cutters. And that was because I did it.

3:22Mike Minogue:So you influenced Craig Cummings No McMillan Yes And who else was wearing one? Oh, Dooley? Dooley for a little while Can I just say all of them No disrespect They all look like idiots with those cheese cutters on I don't know what it is Yeah, but And yet I made it work Jase, you hate So there's a photo of me, Mogey and Jase Which is like our show artwork The three of us

3:50Jason Hoyte:If you've watched any of our social videos that pops up at the end.

3:52Mike Minogue:At the end, yeah. And Jase has got a cheese cutter on and reaching his hand out. Every day Jase walks past that photo and just goes, I hate that photo. I fucking hate it.

4:00Keyzie:I do hate it. I don't think you've ever worn a cheese cutter on this show. Do you remember actually? I used to. This is like when we first started. Five years. I remember the palaver about that photo because they took all these photos of us and Mogi was like, no, you're not fucking using that one because of his eyes or something like that. His eyes were weird. and I was like, no, you're not using that one because I was doing some fucking ridiculous gesture with my hand trying to be hip and cool. And in the end, it just got so stupid. I just went, oh, whatever, just use that. Is that true? Yeah, yeah.

4:34Keyzie:And then they used the one that I hated the most.

4:37Jason Hoyte:The Hauraki Big Show, weekdays from four on Radio Hauraki. The Hauraki Big Show podcast.

4:45Mike Minogue:You know what? My wife used to work in marketing for a radio station and she is very, very, very aware of how punishing announcers are when it comes to photos of themselves. So she'll be like, we've taken 200 photos and there's three different announcers that say hypothetically have all got issues with approximately 70 of the photos each, which means there is literally not one we can use. Yes. And so my attitude now is, to be fair, I just said straight away, yeah, it's fine. You know what I mean? Because I know they're not going to pick you. I can tell.

5:18Keyzie:You're all coiffed and waxed on that one. What are you?

5:21Mike Minogue:Stop saying wax. That's just my old hairstyle. I mean, it's all boofy. But the thing is, Jase, the reason why I said, yeah, it's all good, is because you'll always find issues with you, but everyone else looks at it and goes, and I do as well. I think it looks great.

5:34Keyzie:You want to know. Well, that's what I mean. I reach a point where, oh, fuck it. I don't care. Just do whatever. And then they chose the worst one.

5:41Mike Minogue:No, no, no. But that looks great. You think it looks bad, but that's how everyone sees you. Oh, no.

5:47Keyzie:No, they do. That's a good photo. That makes me feel worse. What's wrong with it? But listen. Hello. But I've honestly reached that stage in my life where I just don't give a fuck anymore. Yeah, I can tell. You know what I mean? And I mean, I know it looks like when I walk into the studio or into the office, you guys are like, styley dude. But I just chuck shit on.

6:11Jason Hoyte:You're all good, man.

6:12Keyzie:And if it works, it works. If it doesn't, it doesn't. I don't believe you.

6:16Mike Minogue:I also don't believe you. I think you look great quite a lot of the time. Quite a lot of the time. Yeah, thanks, man. Some of the time, for sure. And to be honest, we all do this. You get used to just, oh, fuck it, I'll chuck my sweater on, I'll just head in. Yes. But sometimes you'll see, look, you know, I think you do care about how you look.

6:31Keyzie:But I'm more referring to the fact, you know, like pugs will make a video of us.

6:35Jason Hoyte:I'm finding a photo of you, by the way.

6:37Keyzie:And I'll go, oh, fuck, I look terrible. In the video. In the video. With what you're wearing? No, I just looked like shit. And I used to be like, oh, God. But now I'm like, oh, fuck, who cares? No one cares. Everyone loves it. Yeah, well, that's right. And no one does care apart from me. Yeah. And not even I care anymore. And then there's other times I give myself a rager when I see myself.

7:03Jason Hoyte:I think it's important that we give ourselves ragers. I think it's really good for our sexual health. Like, that gives me a rager. that's a photo of when I was on the Hits My Number Two Day show and I had to do the studio photo shoot