OUTRO: Ol' Jase No Mates

0:00For all you mad bastards loving the Big Show podcast, get up even closer on Instagram, YouTube and TikTok or Raw Doggett. 4 to 7 every weekday on Radio Horeke. G'day, fellas. Backbone. Hello.

0:19Keyzie:How's everyone going? Everyone have a good day? What a beautiful day again.

0:23Mike Minogue:It rained for a bit. Did it? Bloody beautiful. We didn't have any rain in the city, man. No, not in the CBD.

0:28Keyzie:Maybe out west. Maybe out where you live, man. Yeah, it might be a bit dirty out that way. Is this how quickly you've turned on the West? She's been beautiful all day on the CBD. Couldn't it be nicer, to be honest? I would say maybe top three days of the summer.

0:44Mike Minogue:Sure, man. You can't tell everyone that you're a Westie and then bag the West as soon as it comes up.

0:50Keyzie:I'm not bagging the West. I'm just saying it's really dirty and it rains a lot.

0:55Mike Minogue:What, is the CBD not dirty?

0:57Keyzie:No, man, it's clean airs.

1:00Mike Minogue:I'd say it's dirtier

1:01Keyzie:The streets are paved with gold They are Gold teeth from people whose heads have been kicked in

1:07Mike Minogue:Yeah exactly You've got to be on your toes around here Kesey man I'm actually fuming a bit fellas Yeah I could sense that

1:16Keyzie:There's meant to be This fucking electrician Coming over to my house What is he going to do can you run us through the work Just fix all the lights in my massive ceiling

1:26Mike Minogue:Is it a friend of yours

1:27Keyzie:No Well, fuck him off out of there then. Well, no, I'm not the one in charge of it. It's someone else that's getting this electrician, so I'm just waiting. So I'm waiting for him on Monday, and then about 10 minutes before he was due to be there, he goes, oh, someone goes, sorry, they're running late. Can we change to another day? And they'd said a day, and I said, no, that's no good to me, but I can do Friday. No response. Didn't hear from them. And then yesterday they go, hey, how about 11.30 to 12.30 tomorrow? Does that suit? And I said, yes, that suit's fine. What did they say? They said, great.

2:07Keyzie:Then half an hour after they were due today, I text them and go, is this still happening? And they went, oh, we're so sorry. Our electrician has held up again. Can we make it Monday? And I was just like, fuck you.

2:23Mike Minogue:What you need to do is say, yeah, Monday first thing, because it's the first thing of the week. That way there's no chance of being held up at another job, you know what I mean? I hate to say it, but he's making a good point.

2:32Keyzie:Yeah, actually, that is a good point, Keezy. Maybe I'll get back to the... That's a good point from you, man. But it's one of those things where I'm not in charge of it, so I can't do much about it. Oh, if you're in charge of it, it would have been sorted by now. Well, if it was two strikes and you're out, as far as I'm concerned. Is it two strikes and you're out? It's like, fuck off. Have you? Yeah, what are you going to do about it? Oh, and if it was me, I'd go, no, you're done. Oh, yes. You're done. And you get somebody else. I'll get someone else. Yeah, I mean, if they bugger it up again, Keezy, what my trick would be to say is, look, this needs to get sorted out.

3:00I can't keep on delaying my day. This is three times you've interrupted me now, three times I've had to chase you. You haven't even been good enough to tell me that it's not happening with enough warning. So I am going to get an electrician, and I'll send you on the invoice. Yes.

3:15Mike Minogue:Yeah, do that. Or go get the, because it's a real high ceiling, right? Get a ladder. Go get the real high stick thing and just tighten the bulbs.

3:25Keyzie:I really don't think that that's going to work very well. I also don't think that's not a good idea. Can you see me doing that? Don't give Chase a big stick, man. Yeah, totally.

3:33Mike Minogue:Just for reference for everyone listening, it's just a regular-sized stick.

3:36Keyzie:Actually, I was changing the bulb in my ass house. In your ass house? And it happened on two occasions on two separate lights shattered in my hand. You're so strong, man. Just went. Did you break it with your jerk in that hand? Yes, I did. And you twisted it the wrong way. Well, I always twist with my right hand.

3:54Mike Minogue:Actually, also just for the listeners, Jase's right arm, he's got like pop arms, forearm. Pop arms, yeah. Pop eyes, forearm. Oh, pop arms. And his left arm's really skinny. Is it? Yeah. Is it? Yeah, maybe. Jase is just having a look. But just then when you were twisting the light, it was when you were undoing it. Is that right? Yes. Yeah, well, you were tightening it just then. It's the wrong way, man. So that's why you were turning it the wrong way. That's why it shattered in your hand. Oh, you've had a shocker there, man.

4:18Keyzie:And then you've got, you know, like a broken fucking light bulb, and then you need an electrician because they're a bastard to get out when they're in that state. So I just left it. You just smash it out. I just left it. Turn off the mains and then you get your pliers out, man. Yeah. But it's scary. How was your guys' day? Talk me through it. What did I do today? A bit of work? A lot of work, Keezy. A lot of work, man. But we're getting there. Had a meeting. Had a coffee. Went for a ride on my bike to the meeting. That was pretty cool there. and had a cheese scone. That sounds fucking sick. Had a coffee.

4:55And rode down a couple of steep hills and off to work there.

4:59Mike Minogue:A couple of what? Steep hills. Oh, rode down them. Yeah. Got to go back up them now, eh? Nah. They're behind me now, Keezy, man. What did you get up to, Keezy? I've got a big list of stuff to prep my house before we put it on the market. Did you make the list, did you? Or did you buy the paper and the pen so you could make the list over the weekend? Digital lists. Digital. Nice. This guy gets it. My notes. And I've already ticked off quite a lot of things, but I added a whole heap and ticked off three more. So it's just a busy day of just doing stuff. But I've still got about 15 jobs that I've just looked around.

5:29Mike Minogue:You know, when you look around, you go, oh, one or two things and we'll be good as gold. And then you put them all down on paper and you're like, holy fuck, sorry, digital paper.

5:36Keyzie:When you sell your house, I'm going to put an offer in.

5:40Mike Minogue:Sure. Honestly, absolutely.

5:44Keyzie:Yeah. Is it going to go to auction, do you think? No, you don't auction out west. Everybody knows that, man. Yeah, that's true. It's pretty filthy up that way. No, it's not about how clean that area is. And you'll be sodding wet by the end of it, standing outside on the lawn. Because it's so dirty, it rains a lot. So that's good, man.

6:03Mike Minogue:Okay, both of you renting in the city fucking a-holes. There's nothing wrong. Come and live out west. Jase, you were out there for 20 plus years. Yeah, man. Only because you didn't know any better. He still owns a house out there. Haughty hermit.

6:15Keyzie:But I'm going to come out when you have an open home. Just have a geese. Just have a geese. Just run his finger along the windowsills and that. And just sort of go outside and go, how's the drainage here? Is there good drainage? You might want to check for moisture behind these walls. Yeah. That sort of stuff.

6:35Mike Minogue:And then they'll be like, sorry, sir, who are you? Oh, I do the show with the owner. Just a mate. Just a mate of the owner.

6:41Keyzie:And then I'll fall over off the veranda and sprain my ankle. Yeah, I don't have a veranda for that very reason. And land on all fours. And then look over my shoulder. Looking over my shoulder.

6:51Mike Minogue:And tell my wife to get the car. The Hauraki Big Show. Weekdays from four on Radio Hauraki. The Hauraki Big Show podcast. I need to get up quite high and paint. Stand on Hoody Joe's shoulders. To be honest It'd be easier to sort of Hold Jace up And get him to paint Right Like you know At the start of the Lion King Where Rafiki holds up Baby Simba Yes I could do that And then Jace Simba was holding the paintbrush Yeah exactly But it's probably about Four or five metres in the air That I've got to paint On the front Of the triangle You know the end of my house The front of the triangle Pitch of the roof The front white bits there They just need a bit of paint Right But I have no fucking idea How I'm going to do it Scaffold Ladder I don't want to set up a whole fucking scale.

7:39Mike Minogue:I've got a big ladder, but it's not big enough, and it'll be dicey. Get a bigger ladder. A bigger ladder? Yeah, sounds like you need a bigger ladder. I do need a bigger ladder. Yeah, I thought so. What about if you abseil off the roof? Wow, now you're thinking how I've been thinking. Or if you hang off the roof and Lucy, your missus there, she holds your feet. Because this is what I said to Lucy. I was like, I'll lie on the roof and hang the top half of my torso off and then reach down and paint. Reach around. You're good at that. Underneath. I'll do the old reach around. Yeah. And she's like, you're not fucking doing that.

8:09Mike Minogue:It's stupid. And I was like, this is pretty fine. There's been a few jobs that I've done, and she's been like, don't do it, it's stupid, and then I've done them, and it's been fine. And it's been sweet, yeah. So I'm just going to keep going. Yeah, they're high risk. Yeah, but one day, Keezy, one day she's going to be right. Yeah, that's the trouble, and you'll never hear the end of it. Yes. Or you will. I'll be in hospital with a broken neck, covered in paint. You'll have a sweet new set of wheels, though. Yeah, and the doctor's going to be like, why don't you just do the whole Lion King, Horty J thing you were talking about.

8:36Mike Minogue:Idiot. What's happening this weekend, fellas? Bit buggered, eh? I buggered last night. I had a good sleep, but I buggered. You're joking? Jesus bloody buggered. Yeah.

8:47Keyzie:I was buggered when I went to sleep. Buggered when I woke up. I was really looking forward to my weekend, and now my wife's sprung on me shit that she's rehearsing both days. What does that mean for you? How does it affect you? Well, because we like to hang out together and do shit, you know? I'll hang out with you. No.

9:03Mike Minogue:No, I'm joking. I'm going to open homes with my wife.