OUTRO: The Review

0:00For all you mad bastards loving the Big Show podcast, get up even closer on Instagram, YouTube and TikTok or Raw Dog It. 4 to 7 every weekday on Radio Horeke. At Bone, yeah! New shirt jizz.

0:19Keyzie:No. Yeah. No, it's not. It's a new one. It's literally brand new. Oh, for fuck's sake. Nothing annoys Jace more than telling him he's wearing a new shirt. It's not a new shirt. I know, but you don't like it when people say that you've got it. Oh, right, okay. Now, I could be lying now, which I am, and you get fucking effing and jeffing over there. I don't really. Oh, actually, here's the weird thing. I've got about four or five. Ball bags. Real new shirts. Yeah. Which I kind of like. They're kind of out there, but they're kind of dress shirts. But I wore one once, and one of my girls went, what the fuck is that?

0:51Keyzie:Oh, that's not nice.

0:52Mike Minogue:Oh, can you wear it to work, please, so we can say that? Say what the fuck is that?

0:56Keyzie:But, you know, I would define them as smart casuals. So say you were going out for dinner, not to a restaurant, say, that Keezy would be going to, but a flasher joint, you know what I mean? Not dumpling, not the food court. Not a food court. Yeah, at your local cinema. Something a bit nicer. That kind of shirt. Or, you know, an evening with friends.

1:21Mike Minogue:That sounds fucking tedious. You've got to start wearing T-shirts, Jase. You're killing me. I know, man. No, it's funny how we split on this one. I think Jase looks neat.

1:30Keyzie:Neat. I'm going to start wearing T-shirts then, Mogey. You're rock and roll, man. You've had your time of wearing those shirts there. How about this? Decent T-shirts, rock and roll. Polo. Takes 10 years off you. What?

1:42Mike Minogue:A polo shirt. I think polo is in the middle.

1:45Keyzie:No, I'm not going polo, Keezy. Actually, funnily enough, there's a great shop on, like an op shop on K-Row that sells pretty cool old T-shirts. Yeah. You know, kind of. Not wacky T-shirts, just with cool kind of old shit. Not like dragons or anything, or dire wolves. Yeah. I'm intrigued by the style that Keezy's running at the moment, the Fonzie style with the sort of short-sleeved shirt and the white singlet. The only thing that's missing for me, Keezy, is number one, you need to wear a gold watch.

2:18Mike Minogue:A gold watch. Gold watch and a gold chain. And a gold chain. You know, I'm not trying to be the Fonz, right? And the Fonz doesn't wear that either. He didn't wear that either. I wouldn't know. And a packet of ciggies rolled up in the sleeve. Yes, I agree. Perfect. Perfect.

2:31Keyzie:Then you could be on the Sopranos. And then you could get your comb out. You have your comb in your back pocket, and then you go to do your hair, and you stop because it's already perfect, and you look at yourself in the mirror, and you go, hey!

2:42Mike Minogue:Oh, that does sound cool, actually. Yeah, yeah. No, this is a look that I bought a whole lot of shirts when I was going to Europe.

2:50Keyzie:Oh, it's your European look, isn't it? It's my Euro look. Is it?

2:53Mike Minogue:I'm going out for dinner tonight. But you've only been wearing the one in here. Is that right? Am I right about that? No, I've had my Steve Irwin one, remember?

2:57Keyzie:I've got to tell you, man. Oh, yes. The black one?

2:59Mike Minogue:Yes. I've got about five or six of them.

3:04Keyzie:When my wife and I were going out, you know, I was trying to find some boots to wear for winter, and we were looking at these shoes, and they were these absolutely hideous, massive sort of bold pink sort of shoes in the shop. And my wife pointed to them and went, oh, look at that. There's some Kesey shockers. Look at that. Did she say that? Yeah. What the fuck? She said, you should just buy those to fuck Keezy off.

3:29Mike Minogue:Well, you're already doing it with your Slazinger's. She did not say that.

3:34Keyzie:Yes, she did. Keezy shockers. There's some Keezy shockers. Why? I don't wear shockers. Because they were the style of your floaters.

3:42Mike Minogue:Oh, new balances.

3:43Keyzie:Yeah, but they were like bright pink.

3:47Mike Minogue:That would be fucking funny if you didn't get those. Me and your wife have got beef now. We've got beef. I don't want to have beef with her. It's all good, man. She's pretty cool. It's all good. It's all good. Are we going to get into it in the show about your wife's play? Or are we going to do it here? Oh, we can do it here. I'd like to hear some honesty, which we probably won't get in the show.

4:09Keyzie:I'm very proud.

4:11Mike Minogue:Right, so it was shit. Is that what you said?

4:13Keyzie:No, no, that's not what I said. No, that's great. Now, we should do this on the show for exactly this reason. Very proud. Why don't we save it? Because you can read that any way you like.

4:24Mike Minogue:Okay. Because I've read it as, why would you not just say it was good? Yeah.

4:27Keyzie:Oh, I enjoyed it. You still haven't said that it was good. It was good.

4:34Mike Minogue:Why did you say it like that? Upwards inflection. I'm not sure about that.

4:36Keyzie:No, I enjoyed it. It was great. Maybe a tad too long for me. Yeah. I'm not a big fan of the intermission. I hate an intermission, but from the house's point of view, they need the intermission. They do, yes. They make money on the intermission. Yes. They need you out there buying those drinks, Kieser. Really?

4:53Mike Minogue:Yeah. I'll buy a drink at half-time, fellas.

4:55Keyzie:No, they did a great job. With the material. I enjoyed it. Yeah, well, if I'm honest, I wasn't a huge fan of the play itself. There you go. Now we're getting to it. But, no, I thought they did a great job.

5:08Mike Minogue:Is that because it's all about, like, women?

5:11Keyzie:Yes. No, it's not because of that. But there's a male. Is it a New Zealand thing? Yeah, it's a New Zealand writer. Elizabeth Esther, I think her name is. Anyway But there's also a male character Who plays lots of different parts Lots of different characters And he's great He was great A guy Leonardo Oh yes Yes yes yes And he did a great job of it But I kind of felt That he was upstaging All the other actors Because all of his roles Were sort of comedic And he'd come on And get all these big laughs And then they'd go back To their sort of monologues And stories And stuff You know what I mean so I found that quite jarring.

5:53Keyzie:That's not his fault, right? No, he was fantastic. He did a great job.

5:57Mike Minogue:That's an issue with the structure of the play itself almost.

6:00Keyzie:Well, the direction it could be. But let me tell you, the audience loved it. Right. Just not you. It was a standing ovation except for Hootie J. No, no, I very rarely give... Hootie J put his hands in his pants.

6:10Mike Minogue:And side.

6:11Keyzie:I tell you what, in the first half, the last 20 minutes of the first half, I desperately needed to do wheeze. Yeah. Like, desperately. and was just hanging on.

6:24Mike Minogue:I hate that feeling, eh?

6:25Keyzie:Just hanging on by the end. It's not good because all of your thoughts. Yeah, you're... You're not concentrating. My bladder was just pulsing.