OUTRO: Therapy Session

0:00Keyzie:Righto? Yeah, man. For all you mad bastards loving the Big Show podcast, get up even closer on Instagram, YouTube and TikTok or Raw Dog It. 4 to 7 every weekday on Radio Horeke. I've just noticed something and I'm disgusted. Yeah, I know what it is. You're wearing a rope. Save it for the show. You're wearing a fucking rope hat. Well, it's just a hat, but it happens to have a rope on it. It's not defined by the rope. Well, it is defined by the rope. To you. It's a braided rope, and it's just... I can't...

0:36Jason Hoyte:just... no. Listen, man, we can't all rock the Elastafit fit any fat dome Vulcan caps, man, okay?

0:45Keyzie:One of the things I have actually noticed, and we've discussed before, actually, about the big show, is we've all got massive heads. Yeah, even me.

0:53Jason Hoyte:Yeah, I mean, yours is really massive. Well, the thing is, is I didn't fit into the massive honker thing. Because you guys are all running some huge beats, but mine's just quite proportionate to my face.

1:04Keyzie:Didn't they say back in the day, Rhi, your nickname was the Sniper's Dream? You've already used that on Chris, I'm pretty sure. And no, they called me Superdome. Did they really? No. What did they call you? What was your nickname at school, Pugson? Heartbreaker. Nah, it's probably something like Juggs.

1:27Jason Hoyte:Juggs. No, I got called a few different nicknacks, not necessarily in primary school, but definitely in high school I had a couple. One guy called me Piglike instead of Pugsley. Did you smack him? Well, it was just so shit. I was like...

1:41Keyzie:Yeah. Some insults or nicknames are so stupid, you just don't even have the energy to fight back, you know what I mean? No, no, no, not at all. And also I was too much of a wuss anyway. Yeah, because you probably would have been smacked over. Well, I was... Because you were a jolly, roly, polly young fella, weren't you? You're a jolly roly-poly little fella.

2:01Jason Hoyte:Listen, in primary I was jolly roly-poly, in intermediate and high school obnoxious.

2:08Keyzie:Yeah, you were saying that the other day. I just really can't imagine it. I just thought I was awesome and hilarious. Right, okay. You know what I mean? And what, was that just puberty? Because you said you went through puberty sort of 17, 18. Was it just puberty that made you like that? Because you're not like that now is my point So what happened? A woman broke your heart and just snapped the big cock Pugsley? Oh wow That was my high school name I mean big cock in the sense of a strutter Not literally

2:47Jason Hoyte:No, I don't know what it was I think it was literally just I don't know lack of identity, trying to find an identity. And I thought, oh, this will be it, even though I was never the funniest person in the room.

3:00Keyzie:So are you saying that you've got an identity now, thus the braided caps? Is that your identity?

3:05Jason Hoyte:Yeah, that's sort of my identity. Now they call me cap braid pugs. Yeah, if I wear braided caps, people will know who I am. Yeah, that's it, man. Yeah. But you were the same. You talked a lot of shit when you were younger. You've talked about it?

3:20Keyzie:Oh, yeah, I definitely talked a lot of shit.

3:21Jason Hoyte:You were a huge yapper, but also you were a tough little bastard, eh? God, you were small, but you were feisty.

3:27Keyzie:I was feisty. I was brought up on the mean streets of Rotorua, and I was a fighter. On the stinky streets. Yeah, well, it is pretty stinky. But you get used to that very quickly. And it's apparently very good for your lungs, the old sulphur.

3:42Jason Hoyte:Really?

3:42Keyzie:Just keeps them clear.

3:43Jason Hoyte:Yeah, apparently so. Do you think that plays into your ability to project your voice and do a job that requires you to use your voice a lot? No. Oh, cool.

3:53Keyzie:I'll get to fuck myself. To get to your point, no, yes, I was a chatterer and a fool and an idiot, but I was never cocky. Right. I wasn't a cocky teenager. Well, I wasn't necessarily cocky.

4:12Jason Hoyte:I think there's a difference between cocky and obnoxious.

4:15Keyzie:I wasn't cocky or obnoxious. I was predominantly a sweet teenager who was quite funny. True, true story. I was not a difficult teen. Yeah, right. I was pretty easy going.

4:32Jason Hoyte:You miss the fellas, man? Oh, yeah. I've made that video before and it made me miss them. I've made a video of the original Big Show fellas just to keep the people fed. Yeah, sure, sure. It did make me miss them. And I know that people miss them too. Yeah, yeah. Yeah.

4:49Keyzie:But, you know, you just get on with it, don't you? Yeah. You know what I'm saying? You put your rope on your cap and you go about your day. Yeah, you put your shield on. The Hauraki Big Show, weekdays from four on Radio Hauraki. The Hauraki Big Show podcast. I, as I say, I got in trouble at school always for talking at the wrong time. That was my thing that I got came for.

5:15Jason Hoyte:I would argue that that's obnoxious.

5:17Keyzie:No, but it was never, it would be telling the fellow stories after lights out, for example.

5:24Jason Hoyte:Oh, okay.

5:25Keyzie:And stuff like that. Yeah, yeah, yeah, okay. And it was just predominantly, I was talking when we were supposed to be quiet.

5:34Jason Hoyte:Well, I... That's not obnoxious. Well, the teachers would have found it obnoxious because you would have had clear guidelines as to when and when and not open your mouth. Not that I agree with those rules, Jason. I would have loved to have heard your stories.

5:45Keyzie:So you think when a young fellow at the age of 12 says to his mate, true story this, Marty, can I borrow your ruler, that he deserves to get three strokes of the cane for that?

6:02Jason Hoyte:Which part of what I said says that? Which part of anything I just said says that you deserve to get three canes?

6:09Keyzie:You're just canoodling up to the teachers and saying,

6:12Jason Hoyte:I was not a teacher's pet. Betray your mates. No, 100 % no. True story, that fucking shocker.

6:21Keyzie:Worse than that, and I've said it before, but it's worth repeating. We used to have to go to a separate maths class for maths. We had a different teacher. And we were told, no talking boys, just get on with the exercises. I needed a ruler. And I said to my best mate, Marty, can I borrow your ruler? and he went, Hoyt, go to Mr. Finney and go and get the cane. I said no talking. Wow. And I went, but I, and he said, go to Mr. Finney's and get the cane. And I was like, okay, Mr. Finney, who was my regular teacher at that age, he said to me, why are you getting the cane off me? What have you been doing?

7:08Keyzie:and I said, well, sir, we were told we couldn't talk and I was asking Marty if I could borrow his ruler and Mr. Christensen said I had to go and get the cane. Yeah. Mr. Finney caned me for misbehaving in another class. Then I went back to Mr. Christensen. Yeah. Who caned me three times. Well, he did as well. As well as the other guy. As well as the other guy. What the fuck? And wrote in the book as to the reason, four times by two separate teachers, for asking for a fucking ruler. Outrageous! And I am disgusted, Pugsan, that you take the side of the teachers and suggest that I was some hideous, obnoxious teenager.

8:02Keyzie:I'm filthy with you right now, man.

8:06Jason Hoyte:School was so different in the 18th century. Unreal. Did you have the cane at your school? Shit, no. Shit, no. It wouldn't have been. We got told to stand outside and then. I can't imagine. Or they'd go to the hall. There was the hallway, which was where all the head administrative people worked. Yes. They had desks down there.

8:27Keyzie:And they'd go, Puxo, why are you in the hallway? Yeah, yeah. Yeah, and you'd have to explain. I was asking a mate for a ruler and... No, I just would have been just chatting away there. I can't even fathom caning a roly-poly jolly little pug, sir.

8:45Jason Hoyte:Well, I can't fathom caning anybody, man.

8:47Keyzie:It's a weird thing, isn't it? Yeah. It's a weird thing, and fuck it hurt. And I'm very lucky to be part of a generation that didn't have to deal with that. Very lucky. Blood welts. We used to get blood welts on our arse. this has turned into a therapy session for old Hoity J

9:04Jason Hoyte:how do you feel like that's affected you today