OUTRO: Too Old For This

0:00Ugh. For all you mad bastards loving the Big Show podcast, get up even closer on Instagram, YouTube and TikTok or Raw Doggett. 4 to 7 every weekday on Radio Hodeck.

0:15Mike Minogue:Back row.

0:19Mike Minogue:G'day there fellas. Hi. How are you guys feeling? How are you feeling, Moggy? Better than yesterday. You have a good sleep last night? Nah. Nah? Nah. Woke up at 3. Did we not talk about this? No, you weren't there yet. you're dragging your hungover ass out I wake up at about 3, 3.30 and then I was just going to get up because I was so wide awake and then I managed to go back to sleep about 5 for an hour and a half and then I woke up feeling miles worse than when I went you know how that happens fellas and that's my sleep story man you missed out on that one this morning when I was telling it fuck that's a shame you're lucky you retold it man I like hearing it the second time have you heard Pugs's one?

0:54you should hear mine

0:55Jason Hoyte:oh you have heard it actually because he does that twice in the space It's three minutes this morning. Yeah, I did it in the hotel while you were dragging. You were hungover, ass out, and then I did it again in the car.

1:03Mike Minogue:Can I just say I was three minutes late and I apologise. I didn't notice. That's okay. It didn't matter because the plane was 20 minutes late. Yeah. 30 minutes late in the end, am I right? Yeah. Fucking hell. But I, this morning, I woke up at three o 'clock, and I said this earlier, but the worst dry horrors I think I've ever had. Right. Like, it was like. I have to say there's something about that, because they have the old school radiator heaters in there. Yeah. Which was nice and warm It was nice and warm But It cooked Hotels fucking suck shit Can I say that guys? Some of them With the air con and all that I would say most of them It's pretty rare for me to get a good night's sleep Because I'll wake up gasping Yeah One way or the other The air con dries you out And the heat Yeah So it's hard to get the balance right The thing I noticed Is the fridge was really fucking loud It was like someone starting a diesel truck in my room That was good I didn't notice that And I was like What the fuck Because if I hadn't noticed that I often turn those off though The fridge?

2:00Yeah And warming You get it eh? Yeah Yeah Because you're ugly I get it

2:07Mike Minogue:I hear you I hear you So I have to do that But yeah But it wasn't a bad hotel It had a window to the outside Which was better than the last joint we were at Deal breaker Jail break Can I say Break free That Christchurch one we were at Break free Worst hotel we've I reckon that's the worst hotel we've been put in It beats the one where you had to sleep under the stairs or Jase had to sleep under the stairs. Oh, yeah. Was that before my time?

2:30Jason Hoyte:Before your time. Was that Taranaki? That was our first OB.

2:32Mike Minogue:First ever broadcast from a... Yeah, that was like a motor in and we were all sharing rooms. I was sharing a room with a guy that used to work here. Ah, yes. Really? So I don't remember him being there at all. Yeah, no, he was pretty chill. Yeah, no, like nothing stood out, but you're still like, you know... When I have a hotel room... That's so funny. I don't want to share a bog. No. No, no. You know what I mean? No, no, no. I don't remember him being there at all because I remember us walking around the streets recording the sex shops and all that was it? Yes but he I think now this is what three four years ago he was going and setting stuff up with Shucks our old producer they were doing that they were fucking around doing that and we were going walking around like Casey Casey walk out of the sex I remember that video and that was when we kept putting Kenny G's saxophone on Jase going through the bookshop and then it would cut to me coming out of a sex shop yeah I can't remember what I was That was funny times.

3:26I was on the pokies. You're on the pokies. It's good quality, man. It is good quality. That was when the big show was good. Now it's shit. Yeah. You know? You got it, man. All the fans out there listening, they'll be like that.

3:37Mike Minogue:I reckon it's getting better. Yeah. I reckon we're getting better and better. Oh, definitely. Fuck, I sound terrible. Like, I sound so different. I wonder if that's the darts. Yeah. Oh, you're on the darts last night. Oh, big time. You sound how you always sound when you've been on the piss. But lately - It's not good, man. It's not good. What do you mean it's not good? I'm worried about you and your drinking, honestly. Really? You're like Jase with his ciggies and his vapes and that. Fuck off. No, I'm not that bad. You're a fucking absolute piece of shit. Really? Yeah, sure. No, I'm all G, eh?

4:01Pugs back me up, man. Yeah, man. Yeah. No, I'm all G, man. Because how many beers did you get in? You were drinking all through the show. Well, yeah. But, Steady, you never got to the point where it was like, oh, here we go. Fucking Keezy's pissed again. Which usually happens in a big show. Come on, guys. Me and Jase look at each other going, here we go.

4:17Jason Hoyte:Oh, God. I'm like watching all the chords.

4:22Mike Minogue:We joke about some stuff, eh, fellas? No, I reckon I had four beers during the show, but because we were there for the old 5.5 % hazies, that's what I was drinking all night. They smelled good, I have to say. I love a hazy beer, eh? They were hearty.

4:36Jason Hoyte:The Hauraki Big Show, weekdays from four on Radio Hauraki. The Hauraki Big Show podcast.

4:44Mike Minogue:My wife, because I had a hazy like a couple of weeks ago, and I was like to my wife, I was like, have you ever tasted a hazy beer before? And so she had a hoon on it. And she was like, holy fuck, that's like the nicest beer I've ever had Real good, I went through a stint though Because I'm not on it at the moment, but that was smelling good Yeah Probably over a year of just not being able to drink beer Ever? Really? Before I gave up Bad night on the piss with your beer? Nah, just like, fuck, I'm over beers, man Over beers? Over beers Especially in this job It's quite a long time Fuck, I've never got to that point I fucking love beers Yeah, and the missus was too And we love beers Yeah, having a beer, man Yeah, man This morning, when I woke up with the dry horrors.

5:24Mike Minogue:Yeah, and a rager. And a, nah, I couldn't muster a rager. Fuck no. There's not enough water in my body. Not that I rely on water. But I had, using the plastic glass, had it like out of the sink in the bathroom of the shitty hotel. I was drinking. It tastes like shit. But I had a couple of glasses of that. Did you get your cup out of the right toilet, man? I mean, out of the right thing? I don't know, man. Oh, no. It tastes like shit. All I could think was, because the cups are sitting in the bathroom, I was like, how many people actually use these cups? Or has that cup been sitting there for weeks while people have been coming into this room, taking a shit, leaving and just constantly going in and out?

6:01Mike Minogue:Yeah, nice. And then I was drinking out of it. It is nice that they sit right above the shitter. I was thinking about all the people that would be nude and rooting and jerking it in there. That's what I was thinking about. That's what gets me over the edge. But when I hopped back in bed and I was pretty fucking like, oh, my God. I didn't realise I woke up didn't know where I was was like oh fuck I'm in Dunedin that's right I'm hungover and then I was like you know what I might take it easy at Magic Ground this year that was the thought I had that's how hungover you were that was the thought I had yeah that's where it goes I didn't know you were that pissed no no it's just was that hungover it wasn't I wasn't super hungover I wasn't super pissed I was just like you were pretty hungover you were dragging your ass around when it was that thing and I said to you at the airport pugs yeah because you said what have you done with Mogi because I was in such a great mood and I said to you, it's when I'm around people that are hungover, it makes me so happy.

6:51Fuck yeah, you feed off it. Because I'm not drinking at the moment. So it makes me super, super happy. You thrive on the downfall of those. Because I'm like, oh, thank God. No, not at all. But I'm so grateful for the decisions that I'm making at the moment. So naturally - Now come Magic Round, I'm not going to be happy at all.

7:07Mike Minogue:No, you're going to be - None of us. But that's what I like. Literally in that moment, I was just like, maybe I just - The Friday night of Magic Round, in my head I was like, maybe I just don't have any beers. 100%. 100%. And I'm thinking the opposite, where I'm going to start drinking when we get to the airport at seven in the morning. Yeah. And then when we get over there, because we've got nothing on the front, we have to do some shit, don't we? No, we just have to go to.

7:26Jason Hoyte:We're doing like a little meeting group pre the first game. But that's literally just at the pub. Yeah, yeah, yeah. That's fucking all good. Yeah, yeah, yeah. But that's at like four. Yeah. I'm planning on being paralytic by then, because I want to be in bed by six, which is New Zealand eight. And then I'm brand new on Saturday. And you're up at two. Doing a bit of work. Doing a bit of work. But I don't know because I quite like the trip. I quite like the flights. I like the lounge. You like riding in the plane. I like the plane ride. Last time I think I had bourbon and coke. So I was on the bourbon and coke.

7:57Especially because we're in premium. Yeah. So I'm thinking because what you've got is you've actually got an opportunity. If you get there early enough, you get there early, you get pissed up. You know, not shocking bastard. Pissed up. And then you're pissed up on the plane. Yeah. More pissed up. Yeah. Then you get to the hotel, nap, bang, round two.

8:19Jason Hoyte:I didn't like getting pissed on the plane last time, like having beers. You're not doing it right, man. No, maybe I didn't have the right amount responsibly or something. Because were you sitting with Jizz? He was behind me. Right. But there was just something. Like, I don't know, there was something about the feeling of being like a little bit wobbly and then being in the air and the dry air and stuff. I'd rather be outside in the free air. You should just stay home, man. Yeah, I think I'll do that. Fuck that. It's wasted on you, man. To be fair, cocaine doesn't give you that much of a hangover, Keezy.

8:49Jason Hoyte:I wouldn't know. It does, though. I literally wouldn't have any idea. That's what I did, man. So just stay off the beers.

8:53Mike Minogue:Weird thing for you to just put out there. I'm having your nasal cavity, though, Keezy. Really? Yeah. But, like.

8:59Jason Hoyte:He's got room.

9:01Mike Minogue:Okay. Pugs, the rule with nose jokes is you have to have a big nose to joke about other people's big noses, all right? Sorry. It's just a proximity thing. It is. It's my fault. And with the size of my honker, you're always in proximity, right? Yeah. You can't say that shit But pleased to say That when I then woke up again At 8 Or whatever the fucking time was 7 When? Today? This morning I was like Oh no yeah I'll be sweet Oh yeah yeah yeah But like in the middle of the night I was just like planning How I'm going to not drink at Magic Round It's shocking isn't it Every time you do it Your head always does it And then as soon as you have That makes you get an old man Is it?

9:36Well that's you considering Not drinking now Which you never used to have That thought did you?

9:40Mike Minogue:Nah And it creeps in Because you're like Oh I'm sorry This feels like shit, I'm over it. Yeah. So, yeah. That's how it starts.

9:47Jason Hoyte:I called my partner last night before I went to sleep, and I was telling her about the show and stuff. And I said to her, oh, you know, it wasn't that much of a big one. You know, packed it in probably like 9 o 'clock or something after the show. And she's like, oh, yeah, you're getting on, are you? Yeah, that's right. Because I didn't party up. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Usually I'd have a whole bunch of beers.

10:06Mike Minogue:Don't let it shame you like that. The live show. At the end of the day, she is dating an older gentleman. And this is what it's like. She has to get used to nursing you through your hard times, bro. 100%. Good training. Help you out of bed and shit. You have to bullshit it, though. I have to bullshit my way through it. Oh, no, that's probably not true. My wife was 26 when I met her, and I was 37, but I was still going hard. You're out of control. I was going harder than you are now. You're a psycho. Fuck, he was going hard, man. You should have seen it. You should have seen me. I was A number one.

10:35You're the man, Moggy.

10:37Mike Minogue:Holy. Hey, don't worry. I know. Actually, it's funny. With this podcast by now, Jase would have been like, You should have seen me when I was going home. He did it this morning when I was telling him about my sleep. It's unreal. But he does it in such a lovely way. He's just trying to relate. By lying. And one-upping. Anyway, listen to the big show. 4 to 7 weekdays, alright? Radio Hodaki! Bye.