OUTRO: Tradie Trouble

0:00Keyzie:For all you mad bastards loving the Big Show podcast, get up even closer on Instagram, YouTube and TikTok or Raw Doggett. 4 to 7 every weekday on Radio Horek here. Oh, g'day, fellas. Hi, Jase. What are you eating there, pugs? What are you eating?

0:21Jason Hoyte:I'm just having a bite of a... Did you? Did you? Did you hear that?

0:27Keyzie:No, I heard it all right. God almighty. Okay, carry on. You had a bite of what? A Snickers bar. Right, okay.

0:35Jason Hoyte:Snickers really satisfy us, eh? A little mini one. A little mini one. You're not you and you're hungry, Mogi, and I'm hungry.

0:41Keyzie:Interestingly, my wife who loves chocolate, the one bar she doesn't like is Snickers, and it's always the one I end up buying her when I'm trying to think of what to buy her for a chocolate treat. Why would you do that? I don't know. No, it's like a mental default that I have. Deficiency. Yeah, or deficiency.

1:02Jason Hoyte:Is it because you've got it, because it's the front of your mind, because it's the one that she doesn't like? It's like don't mention the war, don't mention the war. Exactly.

1:10Keyzie:And then I bring it home and she'll always do the same thing and go, What are you doing, you idiot? I don't like Snickers. And I go, Oh, yeah, I knew that. Snickers doesn't really satisfy. No. Are they the ones with nuts in them? Yeah. Yeah, I don't like them either. I like them.

1:24Jason Hoyte:Me too. I had a few of them yesterday Cheers Pugs Hey help yourself brother I did That was a birthday gift from the office A few Snickers bars Did you get a cake? I did get a cake Yeah nice Very lucky to get a cake I'm sorry you weren't here to enjoy it with me Jase That's okay man Was it a good cake? Was it a bit dry? It was dense Yes It was dense It was actually pretty good Yeah Very thick What kind You can see how people get in behind a cake I really can And that's why I abstain from a cake Right Because once you get into it You just eat Because it's just Fuck it's It's a sugar It's yummy It's a shocking bastard, isn't it?

1:55The amount of sugar in it.

1:56Keyzie:Well, you get a chocolate mud cake or something like that. Once I start, she's all over. I had today, because after what happened today at the office there, talk about on the show, backbone shit. Or do I tell the truth here and lie on the show? Either or will do, Moggy. I went and bought some cupcakes to apologise to everybody in the building that got evacuated out onto the street.

2:23Jason Hoyte:Very nice of you, by the way. Three fire engines, 15 fire people. All were men, but they're fire people.

2:36Yeah, I don't know how much that's going to cost me.

2:38Keyzie:Yeah, I actually wondered about that. Yeah, I reckon about$1 ,500. Maybe, yeah. I would have no idea. Not happy about it, no. The guy, the guy, he won't be coming back. So we got a handyman. I get a handyman in to do odd jobs around the place. And normally it's been pretty good. The one, if I could say that he had a fault, it's that he's one of those guys that complains about the fact that it's his job.

3:10Jason Hoyte:Oh, yeah. Do you know what I mean? So it's like, oh, do you want me to do that? It's like, well, you could not do it, but then you wouldn't be here and then you'd be getting no money. Yes. So I got you here to do this. To do that, yeah. So I could give you some money. And if you don't want to do it, I don't know why you advertise yourself to do this job. Yes. Because every time I bring something up, it's like, I literally said to him today, I said, it's like talking to my six-year-old. It's like, no, but he's constantly trying to find a problem and then there's like a passive-aggressive laugh as well.

3:39He's, oh, okay. Oh, okay. He's not going to be complaining when he does the invoice, is he? Yeah, exactly. And in fact, I had to pull him up on that as well because he was invoicing. I was like, well, you're there for an hour. I'm just trying to work out how it's gotten to this much. Oh, yeah. Oh, no, we'll make it, blah, blah. It's like, yeah, okay. Why don't we make it what it should have been? Yeah, yeah, yeah. And then today it got to the end of the list and there was like three things that he didn't get to because the fire engines came. Yes. And that put us back a bit of time there. And I said, oh, there's still these three things to do.

4:14And he sort of looked at me and I said, but I guess we could do it. He goes, yeah, I think you can. He's got no interest in doing it. It's like I know why this guy works by himself. Yes. Yes. Because he's just fucking, he winds me up so much. Anyway, so I need to find a backbone tradie that just likes to do his job. Dial a backbone. But hit me up. Yeah, dial a backbone. Yeah, hit me up on Instagram or something. I just need something. We have our jobs all the time. I don't have time to do them. I don't have the skill to do them. I just want someone to turn up and do it and not be a fuckwit about it.

4:48Keyzie:Yes. I've been pretty fortunate on the tradie front of late, actually. I've had one shocker where it was, you know, I got some work done around the house and then I got the invoice and it was like, excuse me? Yeah. Did I do anything about it, though? No, I just paid it. Just pay it. But you can also do that and be done with it. But I, yeah. The other thing that happened today, so the other thing was he took, there's a door, right? So there's a door in the bathroom in our office, and it sort of slides. It grinds against the floor. Yes. And so when we first moved in, it was like that. So I got the landlord to sort it out.

5:24Anyway, it's back doing that again. So he's just gone. He'll just fucking take 10 mil off the bottom of the door. So it's all good. He took it out onto the street to do it. The whole door. Which I thought was a fucking. A bit extreme. What's going on? I said, take it around the corner, man. There's a car park there. Oh, yeah. Straight out on the street. I could hear the skill saw going. This is on the main street in Auckland. By the bus stop. He just did it on the street. And then as I left, you know, as you go up the stairs on the left-hand side, there's a concrete wall on the left, a brick wall.

5:57Yeah, yeah. But it's sort of crumbly. And when I left for the day, there's just this concrete from this wall just all over the stairs. So he came out with the door, grounded against the wall, scraped all this concrete off it, which ruins the look of it, and then went, oh, apparently, because someone saw him do it, and then didn't say shit to me and didn't clean it up.

6:18Keyzie:What the hell, man? This is so bizarre. It was unreal. He's never been like this before. I would never have gone back if he was like this before, but he just didn't give a shit.

6:26Jason Hoyte:The Hauraki Big Show, weekdays from four on Radio Hauraki. The Hauraki Big Show podcast.

6:34Keyzie:Do you think that maybe you'd offended him? No. And so he was being petulant? No, because I don't know how you get offended when you're being asked to do the work that you, you know. Yes. And perhaps maybe he was offended by being asked to do the job that he was hired to do. Yes. But just like he was doing, honestly, he was doing shit. He was making mistakes that I would make. Yeah. It was out the gate. It was out the gate. At that point you might as well just do it. It was an absolute all-timer, I've got to say. But yeah, good stuff Anyway, the invoice will turn up Yeah, well, you'll still get an invoice We got a message from our tenants actually Just on doors Saying can we remove the doors And then sort of fit them back on again Because one of them scrapes And it was like Well, yes, the only thing about our doors at our house Is they're really old They're like 20 year old doors And they're like old school doors And really heavy and the reason we didn't do that is because they're an absolute prick to get back on again.

7:40Right, not your problem. And then we said, well, yeah, but this is why we didn't do it

7:45Keyzie:because they're really hard to get back on again and then we didn't hear back from them. So I don't know if they did or didn't. Well, if you said yeah, then they'll probably do it. Yeah, probably. Yeah. I wonder if I'll get an invoice for that. Can I? You know what I mean? It'll be like, oh, shit. That's right. No, but they're going great guns, great tenants in case they're listening. Yeah, and in case this guy's listening, backbone. Yeah, massive backbone.

8:07Jason Hoyte:Awesome, fellas. I doubt he's listening. I doubt he's listening. No tradies in my place, guys. Yeah. I'm all G.

8:13Keyzie:Did you hear about Pugs' shitter? No.

8:15Jason Hoyte:Oh, my God. Oh, your car? Yeah. Yeah. Literally got it out of the mechanics like a couple of weeks ago. What kind of car is it? It's like an old... Tita? No, it's like an old Vitara. Aqua. A Suzuki Vitara. Old Vitara. Your Jeep old Jeep boy. Yeah, it's fucking sick. Yeah. Well, not that sick. I mean it's obviously pretty shit it's terminal it's not just sick I took it into the mechanic a couple of weeks ago and he had it for like four days and I was like fuck it's something really bad I'm going to get a massive bill I'm like shitting myself calling him each day for an update but he just couldn't figure out what the issue was I had given him like a symptom of what chat had told me like just a bit of research very basic I just said oh this says it might be this with these cars I don't know you're the expert anyway he couldn't figure it out gave me back my car after four days after he fixed the symptom I mean the probable cause that I'd found so he sorted that out and it was sweet as and then today it's just shattered I literally pulled into the street here and it just went died and I rolled like a silent Prius down Graham Street and plopped into a park so hopefully it's having a little rest and then I'll be able to get home there's something

9:32Keyzie:heartbreaking about a car breaking down. There's something - I have never in my life had a car break down on me until these two in the last however long. That's been a few months. So good. Never had it. My wife and I bought a Hyundai Pony. Oh, yeah.

9:48Jason Hoyte:What the fuck is that?

9:50Keyzie:A Hyundai Pony for like 800 bucks. Oh, look it up. Kees, you'll be listening to this. It'll be killing them. And it broke down like 500 metres from the guy's house. And it had like a cracked chassis. Is that right? Yes. And we were like, what the fuck, man? And he was like, I don't know, man. It's been going fine for me. And we were like, you fucking. So we took it to the mechanic and it was another like$1 ,200 or something to fix it up. And we bought it for$800. And, you know, this is when we were young. Broke as fuck. Yes, yeah. I was like, fuck.

10:26Jason Hoyte:Well it's really good timing Don't stand for that I'll say that much It's perfect timing

10:30Keyzie:I don't use my car anymore Pugs You could use that

10:33Jason Hoyte:What are you running?

10:35Keyzie:The Axler

10:35Jason Hoyte:I do love an Axler Why don't you get my Aqua

10:39Keyzie:As is wearers I did suggest Pugs just do a Do a Mogey And just leave it on the side of the road But then he pointed out Well that is where mine is Still Yeah Oh well no no I've got it I've got it towed to outside my house Right But then I've got the Aqua because I don't want to pay for parking or anything. So I've got that outside a mate's place in Point Shev. Good. So I need to get rid of that and then fix mine, which apparently will cost two to two and a half, including a new engine. New to me, not new to the world. But that'll do me. And my missus, last night we nearly got into an argument about it.

11:19Yes. Where she goes, oh, you've got to fix the Aqua. I was like, no, I don't like the Aqua. because it's constantly breaking down. And she said, well, but that's only because of the battery. I said, yeah. And in the space of 12 months, we've been through two batteries, so I don't want to get another battery and have that fuck out as well. Yes. So I said, I just want the Tita because we've never had any issues with it and we'll have a new engine. I'm happy with the Tita. I said, you've got your car. You have your car. I'll have my car. She goes, well, I'm going to fix up the Aqua and I'm going to sell it.

11:52And I said, righto. and she goes, and I'm going to keep all the money. Good luck with your car there, pugs. Yeah, that's a shitter, man. Especially arriving. Oh, that's a car. What the fuck? Get out of the system now. It's been like this all week. Has it? It has. Absolute shocking bastard. Are you being serious? Yeah, mate. One thing after the other. A listening of errors. Have a Toledo's, man. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Shout out. Have a shitter. Have a Toledo's. I'll finish my Snickers bar. That could be it.

12:24Jason Hoyte:What? Having a shitter, have a Toledo's. There you go. Five out of ten.

12:32Jason Hoyte:Oh, listen to the big show. 47 weekdays on Hauraki. And if you're in Christchurch, come to the live show tomorrow at Critic Bar. See you there, man. Can't wait. And if you're in and around Greymouth, Hokitika, come see the fellas Friday night and then Saturday. What are we doing on Friday night? We're not doing a live show, but we'll be around. Will we? We're going to a Monteith's bar. Yeah, yeah, yeah. When we get in there, we're going to be hanging out. Where? Monteith's. At a Monteith's brewery down there for a couple of hours. When we get in from the train. I was planning on going to the hotel room and jacking it.