THE DISCLAIMER: Dish Duty

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0:15Keyzie:Oh, g'day, fellas.

0:17Mike Minogue:Hello.

0:20Keyzie:Yeah, man.

0:22Mike Minogue:How are you, Jay? Spritely, man?

0:24Keyzie:No, not at all. I was just saying I was not happy waking up this morning. I was effing and jeffing. Just telling the fellas, before you got here, I woke up at 1.45. Oh, good. Because that's my earliest one. Yeah. I did get a couple of snoozes in later, but I was awake until about four. I said, I've got to get to sleep before the birds come. It'd be a good movie. Yeah. You've got to get to sleep before the birds come, or you can never sleep.

0:48Mike Minogue:Or just a comedy of you versus a bird, like that Rowan Atkinson versus a bee one. Oh, yeah. Man versus bird. There's fucking dozens of the bastards out there. I actually burst out laughing yesterday. It was the day before. Some other bird. I don't know what the fuck it is. Just tweeting away. The ambulance version of a bird. Right. The same volume. Yeah. Weird as fucking thing. Unreal.

1:13Keyzie:I woke up, not yesterday morning, the morning before at two. Yes. After a shocking, shocking anxiety dream. Oh, good. Which I'll tell you about off air because it's not appropriate for on air, which I think you guys will probably find very amusing. Great.

1:30Mike Minogue:Wait, so this was after dinner at my place? Yes. Great.

1:33Keyzie:Yeah. So I trigger J somehow with what I do. It was a shocker, man. But I woke up in a cold sweat just going, oh, fuck. And then I went, no, because my normal thing is to get up in that situation. Rip a vape. Yeah, well, no. So I went, no, no, I'm not doing that. So instead I just lay in bed for about two hours wide awake going, oh, good one. Just running it through your head. I was just dreaming about the Warriors. It's tough to take, fellas.

2:03Mike Minogue:We'll have to do a debrief on the show, I think. Yeah, yeah. You don't get much of one, though, do you? Because you're talking to Gubb.

2:08Keyzie:Even my wife was effing and jeffing. I do too, yeah. Was effing and jeffing. Was she? Yeah, a little bit. But how good Eden Park, man. Oh, it looked great. It was amazing. Yeah, it was pretty cool. I drove through Kingsland there during the day. It was getting off, man. It was so cool. I bet. It made me really, really happy. Yes. Just rammed. Such a great place for it. All the bars. It's our own little Caxton Street. Yeah, it is. It should be. It's a good little set up.

2:32Mike Minogue:It should be. But because the kind of All Blacks and stuff, they don't really have raucous party kind of fans. So it's just, the vibe's good during an All Blacks game. But during that Waz game, it would have been fucking awesome. Yeah, it was. It was fizzing. Yeah. It was fizzing. God, I'm gutted I missed it. What, Kingsland?

2:51Keyzie:Yeah.

2:51Mike Minogue:The fizz. Oh, yeah. They would have loved having you. Yeah, they were shouting out at me, where's Ordy Jay? He's coming. He's coming. He's on TV. Don't want to miss it, man. He's steaming it. Don't get me started about Caxton Street. No, bloody hell. I enjoyed the game. It was great. Disappointing result. It's hard. It's hard. It's a long year, isn't it? It's a long year. It's a long year. It's a fucking long year. It's a long year to have it end like that, I've got to say. I was eating leftover lasagna. Yeah. Because my coffee table folds up and you can eat on the couch. So I was sitting on the couch there eating leftover lasagna, drinking leftover red wine, just effing and jeffing a wee bit.

3:29Mike Minogue:Just gutted, actually. I wasn't even swearing. I was just gutted. My daughter ran a tally. I owed her about$27. Yeah. She wasn't allowed to say$1 to me every time I swore. Yes. Instead, she ran a tally and she went, she said, booyah, she said. Right. Yeah.

3:44Keyzie:What? Who? I actually, funnily enough, Mogi, I was thinking of you when I was watching that game going, I wonder if Rangi's, you know, getting the old money into a kitty.

3:53Mike Minogue:Yeah, absolutely she was. Who owes you the most? Who owes who? Who owes you the most? Who caused the most F-bombs? Oh. Because for me, it's Ali Laetawas. Yeah, I didn't notice anything from him. That's funny. It's just, that's, honestly, there was just a few. And he almost scored that try. Yeah. No, it's just defensive plays and just little dumb things. Defensively. Yeah, right.

4:16Keyzie:Who's the halfback? Not Tahiti Martin, the other guy? Tahiti Martin.

4:21Mike Minogue:Shanau Harris-Tavita.

4:21Keyzie:Yeah, he had me effing and jeffing. A couple of crucial missed tackles. A couple of really shit kicks. The kicking was shit. Yeah, the kicks was not good. The kicking was shit. It was like, oh, man. Mind you, they did say, we'll get into this in the show, obviously. They did say before the game it was not good conditions for kicking because it was swirling all over the place. You put it up fucking high then. Yeah, well, that's right. Yeah, exactly. That's right. To make it hard.

4:44Mike Minogue:Put it above Greg Marju, who sucks at taking highballs. Oh, God. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Good stuff. The Hauraki Big Show, weekdays from four on Radio Hauraki. Now that's good listening. And it's live. What are you listening to there? Oh, me? Oh, sorry. I was listening to the Radio Hauraki Big Show. Right. Four to seven weekdays. Yeah, that's quite specific And iHeartRadio Wado, cheers The Hauraki Big Show Podcast Well, we'll talk about the waas there But I need you guys to know that my dishwasher packed up after I thought I fixed it Oh no So I loaded up my kitchen bench This is after come dine with the fellas, Keezy Keezy had a house full of dishes and his dishwasher packed up It was good stuff, we left him to it It broke straight away And like my bench, this is the most dishes I've ever had to do.

5:44Mike Minogue:And I went star and it just shat itself. And I was like, fuck. So I thought I fixed it, started working, fucked out again. I just went to bed. I was like, I can't deal with this. Yeah, good. I was dealing with the idea of hand washing a billion things. Yeah. But the next morning I was sitting apart because I got up, had a coffee, pulled the side off the dishwasher, managed to fix it, and then got through all the dishes and it was fine. Yeah. What was it? It had overflowed due to something went in the filter and made it overflow. And then I pulled out the filter and cleaned it, but there's a bit underneath that catches water, and if it senses there's a lot of water in there, it won't turn on.

6:16Mike Minogue:Right. So I pulled it out, but I mopped up that water, cleaned the filter, and it was fine. Happy day.

6:21Keyzie:We, and I think you were probably similar, Moggy, ours took about two days to clear all the dishes. Yeah, right. But also, like, our dishwasher's got a really small capacity.

6:33Mike Minogue:Is it one of those drool ones?

6:34Keyzie:Yeah, it's fucking annoying, actually, and so you can only load it up so much. Um, but yeah, it was a fucking pain in the ass.

6:42Mike Minogue:Are you like my parents where you don't use a dishwasher because you like hand washing the dishes? No. I've got a mate who's like that. I don't get it. Yeah, neither. Fuck that.

6:50Keyzie:I do like, I don't mind hand washing dishes, but no, I'm not.

6:53Mike Minogue:But mum and dad will be like, oh, it's not enough to turn on the dishwasher because they get a full size dishwasher. Yes. And so I'll go around there and I'll be like, oh, so I'll just put this in the dishwasher and I'll open the dishwasher and like fucking spider webs are in there. Yeah. And I'll put a dish in there. No, don't put that in there. Yeah. Just put it next to the sink. Yeah, just wash it, you lazy bastard. Maybe if it's just two of you. They just love it. Just love mucking in.

7:16Keyzie:Well, yeah, because if there is just two of you, you're only getting a few dishes, and you might as well just bang them out. Could you tell my missus that? Sure.

7:26Mike Minogue:Honestly, in lockdown, I don't think I told you guys, but we had to have a chat about reusing the same mug and cup. Oh, yeah. Because we didn't have a dishwasher, and I was hand washing everything. I was always on dishes. Yeah, that's right. And I was like, holy fuck. Just get a fresh one out every time. Just without thinking. Fresh spoon.

7:39Keyzie:It's out right. Like my daughter is so bad. We will have, I swear to God, in one day, 20 cups. Should we open the show with us? 20 cups. Yeah, no, Lucy's the same. And glasses. Shut up, Pizzie. Can you just fucking use one glass, please?

7:59Mike Minogue:And what else does she do?

8:00Keyzie:Oh, don't get me started.

8:03Mike Minogue:No, Lucy's the same. We already have. But I've just noticed. There's so many times I've been like, geez, how many cups you got? And she'd be like, oh, sorry. She just doesn't notice, you know? Yeah, yeah, yeah. So it's like, oh, wow, this is obviously just what she's like. Just floats around getting mugs out.

8:15Keyzie:Divorce, man.

8:16Mike Minogue:You reckon? Yeah, I think so. Yeah, I'm pretty sure. Maybe I just, like, divorce her and then just go move to Bali for, like, a couple of months. I think so, man. Just say you're doing some groundwork. You're exploring what, maybe moving there. Yeah. Doing a bit of groundwork. I mean, you're just over there, just, you know. You know what you're like. Yeah. just muck it in.

8:38Keyzie:It's funny, eh, because I watch a lot of videos of people that move to Bali, old fellas. Do you? Yeah.

8:43Mike Minogue:Actually, I watched a lady talking about moving over there. He does. The other day on YouTube on Saturday or something, I watched the thing about an older lady who had moved to Bali and was talking about her overheads and how much it costs. Yes. But what I didn't realise is that you build a house there, someone owns the land, and you can only ever lease it. Yeah. And then once the lease is up, they get to keep the house and the land and you can't do anything about it. Yes. Which is great.