THE DISCLAIMER: Rude Awakenings

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0:15Keyzie:Oh, g'day fellas. Backbone.

0:21Yeah, great stuff. How's second day, Keyzie? Second day hangover.

0:27Mike Minogue:Shit, sleep my son. Yeah, man. Yeah, same actually. It's fucked. Terrible. Same here. If I could just talk about mine for just one second. No, no, no. Why didn't you get a load of this? There's probably no point talking about yours, given how bad mine was. Jesus. Mine was probably worse. I'll go second and then we'll just let Jase go last, because without a doubt. This was the worst. Yeah, for sure. So I couldn't go to sleep. Oh, keasy. I was in bed at nine, tossing and turning. You hadn't been tongue in the bag, had you? What does that mean? Tonguing the bag? Yeah. What does that mean? We can't get into it on air, man.

1:00No, it's, come on, man. Like shagging or something? No, not shagging.

1:06Mike Minogue:Something naughty, though? Something naughty. Not sexual, though. No, not last night. Finally got to sleep, started drifting to sleep like maybe 11.15, so two hours a bit in bed. And then I accidentally set an alarm for 11.55 p.m. instead of a.m. today to buy tickets for the Waz. I set it for just before midnight last night. And so that went off just as I fell asleep. I went, fuck, turned it off, and then couldn't go to sleep again for age. Right, okay. And then woke up really early. What are you, like seven? Fucking annoying. No, it was like 6am or some bullshit. On the day I turned my alarm off and said I'm just sleeping in, boom, up early.

1:39Shocking, man. Saw the toxins in your body from the sausage fest. Yeah, I think so.

1:44Keyzie:It takes a while to leach out there, Keezy.

1:46Mike Minogue:How do I leach it quicker?

1:48Keyzie:Wow. It's just a time thing, man. Yeah, just water, lemon juice beating off. Sweet, well. Tick, tick, tick.

1:56Mike Minogue:I've had one of those things quite a lot. Yeah. And I am thirsty now.

2:04How tired are you, man? How tired am I? Okay, then. Well, I went to bed at about nine, so I got six hours sleep. So I was awake at three, probably 2.30, 2.30. Because I was going to the gym this morning. So I set the alarm for quarter to six, ten to six. Because my brother-in-law is going to the gym, you see. Yes. And I'm finding if I don't go in the morning, that I find excuses over the course of the day and I just don't go. Yeah. I'm not back into my I'm loving it stage and can't wait to go stage. Yeah. So then I just sort of was awake for the rest of the night. I probably nodded off once and was dreaming about, I was actually dreaming about coming up with an excuse for not going to the gym.

2:43Mike Minogue:Oh, really? Did you come up with anything good? No, not good enough. Ended up going to the gym. Stink. So that was, and then the birds started, the fucking birds, which I'll get into on the show.

2:52Keyzie:They actually start, I've noticed, at about three in the morning. They're fucking assholes. It's just unbelievable. I was up at three the other day. What are we doing? What are we doing? And it was like birds at 3 a.m. in the morning just tweeting away. A twit to woo. I had a shocker too, fellas. Just drifting off. I went to bed probably caught past ten. Jeez, you're a no-one-el. I know, I know. And was really tired and was just drifting off. Yes. And then my daughter came out of her room, ba-ba-bang, da-doge, bang.

3:35And just walking out. Just walking out. Yeah, not doing anything. To the bathroom or whatever. Not dragging a dead body or anything.

3:41Mike Minogue:Was it actually that loud or was it like, yeah?

3:44Keyzie:It's like she's breaking out of prison, my daughter. Have you told her that? Well, she should be quiet. Yes, all the time. I say to her, can you maybe just try and open your door a little more quietly? Yeah, my brother-in-law's the same. It's ridiculous. Just no sort of awareness. No. If he goes out to the gym, I love him. Great guy. He'll go out the door and he'll just slam the door, which is right beside my bedroom, or make no effort to close it quietly. Yes. And then heel, heel, heel, heel, heel, all the way down the stairs. Heel, heel, heel, all the way past our window on the deck. And then walk out the gate and slam the gate and knock it off its hinges.

4:21Yeah. Do you know what you guys should do? Shout out. See you later, Mogey. From the footpath. It's fucking six in the morning. I know. Carpet your houses, man. Carpet them up. Well, I do have carpet in the apartment. Carpet the outside. What, down the hallway? But it turned out. It turned out. Carpet the door. Casey!

4:39Mike Minogue:The Horaki Big Show. Weekdays from four on Radio Horaki. You know how good the Horaki Big Show podcast is? Yeah, I love those fellas. Backbone. Yeah, backbone. You get it. You've got to get around the live radio show. Oh, you win that. Four to seven weekdays on Radio Hauraki and iHeartRadio. Backbone.

5:03Keyzie:Ho, ho. Nice.

5:04Mike Minogue:The Hauraki Big Show Podcast.

5:07Keyzie:It turned out that my daughter had a shocking sleep and she was up till like three or four in the morning in and out of her room. Doing what? All fucking night. And I remember lying in bed at one stage. I think it was about one or two and just going, oh, for fuck's sake. Yeah. I get like that. You won't be surprised to learn, man. And then she'll hear me and slam her door because she's pissed off with me because I'm pissed off. So what, you said all for fuck's sake out loud? Yes. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And then my wife wakes up and she's like, are you all G? And I'm like, well, no.

5:44Keyzie:Because you're waking her up now. Because she keeps. And now she has to hear your bullshit. Yeah. And now she's fuming. Oh, I'm living your life, man. We're living each other's lives. I've been down this road.

5:53Mike Minogue:You guys should move in together. I tell you what, at least we get a good night's sleep. I think so. We'd be considerate, Kesey. Exactly. A couple of backbones. I don't know. I do. I don't know. Well, I do because we are annoyed by the same things. Yes. We'd be smoking inside. That'll be day one. Do you get pissed off by Jase's daughter? Well, I get pissed off by people I live with. Yeah, yeah.

6:17Keyzie:And her door is right next to our door. They didn't plan it well at all, did they, the layout of that apartment? Bedrooms right next to bedrooms. What's that about? Shocking. This is all in front of Keezy. Keezy can't believe it. Keezy will be you. I think I'll be more chill. I know, that's what you think. She'll sleep till 12 or 1 the next day. I'm up at like 4 to 6 going effing and jeffing. I used to be the chillest guy in the world, Keezy.

6:44Mike Minogue:Really? I don't believe that. 100%. Chillest guy in the world. Well, very, very chill, but it takes the chill out of you, brother. It's all in front of you, man. You think it's easy, man? No, chill, man. You think it's easy? It's fatigue, Keezy. Fatigue?

6:58Keyzie:Yeah. But how are you in terms of, you know, your second day there? You're looking a bit... Yeah, you're looking pretty poked, man. Yeah, you're looking tired. But it's chill because... What about if we just drag you all show, like, just annoying little stuff like yesterday? Not dragging you, but just annoying things.

7:12Mike Minogue:Like pull it together, Keezy. Yeah, you pull yourself together. Never want it to slap you more, Keezy. Well, whatever makes the three hours go faster, to be honest. I'm with you, man. We can do that every break if you want. Yeah, yeah, totally. I've got to get out early tonight. I've got to play at nine o 'clock. Wow. Sweet. Do you actually ever play at nine? No, it's at eight. Okay. Yeah. So we can still do a post-show meeting? Brainstorming for tomorrow's show? Absolutely, brainstorming. Brainstorming for all. Yeah, yeah. Of course. Fuck yeah, baby. Tell you what, I watched the end of a show last night, the Ahoy J.

7:45Yes. How good, eh? Alone. What a great show. Brilliant. One of the greatest. Yes. What a joyous discovery that has been. Five buzzies. Totally, man. Really, that good. Up and down, all day, five buzzies. I was in tears in the final episode. Yeah. Joy or? Both. Yeah, right. Both. Okay. Very happy for someone, very sad for someone else. Yeah. What a couple of absolute backbones. Absolutely. My favourites from the start, the two of them. Yes. I agree. Men's being Keezy. Not like you and me. Not like I'm already J. Kind of like already J. More like Jase. Yeah, like Jase.

8:26Keyzie:But I agree with you. The two, they were both backbones. Absolute backbones. And you sort of felt gutted for one of them. Very, very much so. Yeah, on the verge of dying and still like, I'm not leaving here unless I get medically evacuated. Yes. Both of them.

8:42Mike Minogue:How many episodes is that season? I think it was 13. Yeah. That's not too bad.

8:47Keyzie:You should watch it, Kizem. It's so good. It's bloody great. Yeah, unbelievable. But I am going to spoil it today. I am going to say who won't. Yes. Yeah, right. It's been out for over a year. That long, has it? Yeah. Wow. Yeah. Okay. I'd never heard of it, except for you going on about it.

9:03Mike Minogue:I don't think I've ever heard anyone ever talk about it. And in fact, I'd say people would have just heard of it for the first time from our show. Yeah, well, that's the thing. Like, I ended up researching articles and following everybody on old socials and YouTube and stuff, but there was obviously, there was definitely media coverage of it at the time, but I never saw it. No. No, same. But I'm going to be watching everything. I think they're in the Arctic Circle in this new one, and they've done Fiordland before, so I'm going to do the Fiordland one. It's all good stuff. It's great stuff. I suppose it's like me and my wife with Amazing Race Australia, I was going to say.

9:39Yeah, right.

9:40Mike Minogue:Love that show. Except you could die. Yeah. Yeah, but we don't need that. Yeah, you do, man. Yeah, you do. Yeah, you do. It's pretty awesome. And the woman in it was amazing as well. She was amazing. Everything about it was great. And I felt, well. I was shocked that she left.

9:54Keyzie:Yes, so was I. It was like, what? Because she was having a lovely time. She was. And she was in complete control. And it was like, you know, I don't have any time for the people that go, oh, I miss my family. It's like, fuck that shit, man. Come on. You can go and see your family anytime. You knew what you were there for, man. Yes. There was a guy that jumped out of the Echise after about a week and a half or something. Yeah. He just started fixating on the fact that he didn't have his kids with him or his missus, which seemed to be just covering up the fact that he couldn't catch any fish. Yeah, he couldn't handle it.

10:26Yeah, he couldn't handle the jandle. The jandle. Yeah, right. And yet the possum hunter guy, Shea, who is, I was looking at him up, so he left school when he was 16 and he went and lived in the bush for the next four years. Yes. All four of his next birthdays were in the bush. He would go into the bush and trap possums alone for anywhere between a minimum of two weeks up to two months by himself. Yeah. Unbelievable. Unbelievable.

10:54Keyzie:He's a great character. He is really a great character. He is one of the all-time great New Zealanders. Yes, he is. An absolute legend of a human. And my daughter loves him.

11:03Mike Minogue:When I'm watching Hunt for the Wilder People, I always think, yeah, I'd love to go bush. But then the reality is I'd be fucking hopeless. Yeah, same.

11:09Keyzie:but I actually thought that that woman you were talking about and Shay would have been a pretty good couple. Oh, did you? Yeah, because she was like, her whole thing was, oh, I want to have a baby. Yeah. And I don't know that this is good for my womanly sort of situation. But imagine those two together because she was a backbone as well. She was, but he met his missus in the bush. She was out trapping possums for two weeks by herself. Yeah. So she's a weapon as well. And she is. There you go, eh? It's on TVNZ Plus. I'll be banging on about it in the show as well. One of the greatest shows ever made.