8 Mindset Shifts to Transform Your Relationship with Money

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0:37Welcome back to the Jasmine Starr Show, where we talk about life, business, and everything on the in-between. I don't know what kind of day you've had, or let's be real, what kind of week or even month, but today I am sharing with you some mindset shifts that you could start making immediately in your business that revolve around, wait for it, money, honey. Okay. Did I ever tell you that I ironed my money? Yes. As in iron my dollar bills because I wanted them crisp and new. And then I would neatly fold them and keep them in a tin. It's like a tin can. It was like an old school bandaid container.

1:12And then I would hide that tin can container in my mom's closet under a pile of laundry. And let's just be real, like laundry that just, my mom had best efforts. She never folded enough laundry. And like that laundry would never, ever get folded. Now to say that I was fascinated with money, it would be an understatement of the decade. Money wasn't something that we had in my family. So whenever I got it, I hid it. Like looking back, I realized that hiding money, it made me feel safe. Money gave me options. Money prevented me from feeling like I was stuck. Money was freedom. I once heard a girl tell a story about how her grandparents grew up during the depression and they hid food around their house.

1:49So she once found a box of croutons under her grandparents' bed. And then we laughed and I was like, oh, that's so funny. But like deep down, I knew I was one stale piece of bread away from somebody laughing at my Band-Aid metal tin. Like all these years later, I've learned to talk about money. And that is what we are getting into today on this episode. So come correct y 'all. Crack open them wallets, brush off them like spider webs. I want to encourage you to listen to this episode no matter what stage of business you're in. Because this work that we do around money, it's not just something that we can like, I'm gonna check this off my do-do list.

2:26This is ongoing work that we have to constantly do, especially as we reach new levels in business. Now, there are eight mindset shifts that I've made over the years, and I'm gonna share them with you today. So let's get going. Number one, rewrite your money story. We've heard phrases all about money our entire lives. Like, oh, money is the source of all evil. Money doesn't grow on trees. You have to step on people to make a lot of money. Okay, the thing I heard in my mind was money is a thing to be lost. Now I have to say that my dad is one of the hardest working men I've known. He worked three or sometimes four jobs at one time.

3:03And yet even then, without an education and as an immigrant, he struggled to make ends meet. Now a lot of times whenever we felt like we could take a sigh of relief, oh, then the car would break down or the washer machine needed repairs or we needed to pay like, oh, surprise bill. Like money seemed to drip faster than it would come in. And it was kind of like watching sand seep through your fingers. Like we just couldn't get a grasp on it. And my friend, Mel Abraham, he says to separate the interpretation from facts. This means separating feelings or biased beliefs or societal conditionings from the actual circumstances.

3:39Mel said to think about what the camera lens would see. So as a photographer, I'm just a riff here. We're gonna talk for a second. As a photographer, I was looking through a lens. And this is what we often do as business owners. When you put a lens on a camera, you are seeing the scene through that lens. Now, the different lenses that you put on will add more or less to the scene. But here's one thing. The camera lens would only see the facts. But our minds, well, we mix feelings and facts. And then together, that's where the truth gets blurred. The first mindset shift is bringing awareness around your money story.

4:14So here are four steps to rewriting your money story. Step number one, the first step to rewriting your money story is to become aware of your current money story and then reflect, hey, how did this shape my relationship with money? You could ask yourself questions like, what are my beliefs around money? How did my upbringing influence my views on money? Are there any negative phrases or experiences that's holding me back from getting the money that I want or deserve? Because here's the thing, when we understand our existing money story, we can begin the process of transformation. I used to think that money had to be hidden or else it would be lost.

4:51That was my old money story. Now I have rewritten my story to believe that money is simply a tool that I can use to grow and not decrease over time. Money is a tool that I can use to grow. Now, the second thing that we're gonna focus on is identifying your limiting beliefs. The next step to rewriting your money story is to identify any limiting beliefs that are getting in the way of your business and its growth. Now, these beliefs might include things like money is limited. Money is not for me. I'm not worthy of wealth. I'm bad with money. Hey, write down these beliefs. Now, you might think, no, they're just, I don't believe this.

5:28It's just a thought. Well, write down the thought. Write down the thought and then challenge them by replacing them with empowering beliefs that support your success. Change it to, I am deserving of the wealth I create. I work hard for my money. I am learning how to manage money. I make great investments with my business. Ooh, friends, these words are going to determine your thoughts, your actions, and eventually your habits. Now, once I changed my beliefs around money, I quite literally started making better decisions about money. It all started with changing my beliefs. The third thing we're going to focus on is reframing past experiences.

6:03It is time to reframe past experiences with money. Look back on any negative financial situations or failures and then reframe them as learning opportunities. There was a time in my business where I was overextended. I've spoken about this on the podcast before, but if you're new, let me recap. My husband and I, we moved into a new home. We spent quite a bit of money of our budget refurbishing this home. And then what happened was the expenses continued to increase. And then at that time, I decided to close many arms of my photography business and those revenue streams. And at that same time, I was hosting a live event that I was paying for upfront with cash.

6:43And at the same time, I was trying to build out content to create a future course. It was like this torrential shift of, oh my God, everything happened at the same moment. Did I just make the biggest mistake of my life? I found myself that I couldn't sleep at night. I literally thought to myself, you are a financial failure. When I look back at that experience and I see where I've come today and how much I've grown and the positive decisions that I have made, I wasn't a failure. It was just series of series of epic lessons to learn from that have empowered me to grow my business even beyond that point.

7:18So you wanna shift your perspective from seeing them as failures to seeing them as stepping stones. Ooh, stepping stones on your path to success. Embrace the lessons you've learned and use them to move yourself forward. Now we're gonna talk a little bit more about financial forgiveness? Ooh, yes, we're going there a little bit later in the episode. I just did mention the time that we had over-extended ourselves with creating this course, but now that was a lesson. Number four, creating a new money story. Now that you've gained awareness and you've challenged limiting beliefs and you've reframed your past experiences, it's now a time to create a new money story.

7:55Now, this is people are like, oh, Jasmine, you're so woo-woo. No, I'm not woo-woo. I am a dreamer that other people call visualization. And guess what? It works. I want you to visualize the financial reality that you want out of your life and business. What does financial abundance look like to you? Like write down your new money story in present tense as if it's already happened. What I want you to say is I made this much. I invested this much. I bought this much. It's been done. When you write it as if it has already happened, all of a sudden you start mapping your actions to your aspirations.

8:31I want you to be as specific and vivid in describing these experiences and these achievements with a new mindset that you are going to embody. Okay, now let's move into our next step. I'm going to share a little bit of my future vision. Now, I know it's a little bit personal. I'm going to be real with you. But when I think about my future version of success, I got really, really, really clear. I had to put in my mind when I know that I'm a success. Now, this doesn't have to do with the amount of commas and zeros in my bank account. I have to tell you that when I spent the time to quite honestly visualize myself and my future success, I was in Providence, France, and I was in an old home that had been refurbished on the inside.

9:15There's copper pans in the kitchen. There is somebody cooking in the kitchen. There is an infinity pool, and my daughter is swimming, and we are adjacent to fields of lavender, and I'm not there on vacation. I am working from a different place. In my mind, I know I'm going to go out and I'm going to say this. I'm going to say this. My husband, JD, is sitting next to the infinity pool and he's sipping French wine and their charcuterie and cheese and they're laughing. And I get to sit on the inside watching this beautiful thing happen in the middle of the day, knowing that I have a driver to take me from the house we're staying in into town so I can pick up a few things for dinner that I will then bring home and have somebody cook that meal.

9:56We will be in the pool with our daughter. We will be smelling lavender. We will be hearing bees. We will be eating French food. That, regardless of the money that is in my bank account, is when I know that I get to work, I get to breathe, I get to see what true success is. That's mine. But did you hear how clear it was? Like, y 'all, like I'm smelling this ham. I'm smelling the prosciutto. I am smelling the wine. I'm smelling stinky cheese. I don't eat stinky cheese, but my husband just loves it. One time we were in France and they brought out dessert and dessert was cheese. I was like, oh man, like in America, America, we do it different.

10:33We eat our cheese in the beginning. Well, the French, cause they're so fancy. They eat it after dinner. And here, I kid you not hand to heaven. They brought out this piece of cheese. They sliced it down the middle. And then the thing burped the cheese burped. It's like, and I was like, oh God, like the cheese went bad. And then my husband gets a piece of French bread and he dips it in the stanky burping cheese. And he closes his eyes and he's like, this is the best thing I have ever eaten, to which myself, I'm like simultaneously appalled and enthralled because he must be way fancier than I. But in my future visualization, my homeboy, he's eating that stinky cheese again.

11:11Okay. So that visualization, friends, it's real for me and not if, but when it happens, I will look around and say, you've thought this into life. Oh, okay. The second mindset shift around money is acknowledging when you're ignoring your numbers. Yeah, I've been there way too long. That's what I did. What I want you to do is carve out time to analyze your financial data. If it's weekly, bi-weekly, monthly, I want you to set up a tracking system and notice patterns and unnecessary purchases and subscriptions. I saw a TikTok creator who goes by the name of Tatiana Credit, and she says to use the Marie Kondo method on your monthly statements and to ask yourself with every single purchase.

11:55Did this bring me joy? If the answer is no, in 15 seconds, lesson learned, don't buy that or something similar in the future. I also want to encourage you to go through regular financial audits so that you can make sure like, hey, when are these investments being made? Am I being responsible for them? Is my money being mismanaged? And then you're going to be less stressed as a leader and as a business owner where the dollars are coming from and going. And here's a tip. If this is emotional for you, like it was for me, try seeking accountability with a business partner, a team member, a spouse, or a financial professional.

12:31Knowing your numbers is something that you have to do, but it doesn't mean that you have to do it alone. There is also a lot of software and technology out there that's going to run reports for you, and then you can get into it for yourself. Now, I have to tell you that here's a brief little story about our fractional CFO. Having a CFO, a chief financial officer, it felt like, oh, that's too expensive. Once the business gets to be X amount of millions a year, then we're going to hire a CFO. But then I learned a fractional CFO. This means that this person is a legit certified chief financial officer, but we're only hiring him or her for a certain amount of time.

13:08So for us, we hire them for monthly meetings, projections, our profit and loss statements, balance sheets, and we meet with him every single month so that we know exactly where we are. Because I admit, it was very emotional for me. The months that we made a lot of money, I'm like, I'm a success. And the months that we did not make as much money, I was like, that's it. I'm doomed. I'm a failure. When all actuality, when I sat with somebody who was a professional and forecasted where we would be at the end of the year with accuracy and confidence, it really did change the stories I was telling myself.

13:38Okay, let's move on. The next and third shift is believing that there is enough to go around. I think that sometimes we subconsciously believe that if we have more, that means that someone else is getting less or worse. Let's be real. If someone else has more, we're going to get less. And that's not true. When money gets in the hands of small business owners, society wins and wealth becomes redistributed. So here's a little exercise I would like for you to do. Take a moment and look outside in nature. Now, if you don't have outdoor access right now, just imagine this nature, okay? Write down what you see.

14:13The stars, the clouds, the flowers, the trees, the sand, the waves, everything in nature lives in abundance. And we as humans, we're extensions of nature. And we are meant to go and live in abundance too. But I did not learn this lesson up until a couple of years ago when I met Gary Vaynerchuk. Oh, yeah. Was that like a little bit of a humble brag? It's not intended to be. It's just facts. Now, I can get into at a different time. I'll get into a different time how I met Gary and how we had the chance to meet together. But I will say that in 30 seconds, I got my ego slapped upside the head and set straight.

14:54I had a conversation with Gary about building Social Curator. I talked about what we were doing. And he says, huh, I was thinking about doing the same thing. And my immediate response was, oh, I'm so glad you didn't. Like how could we ever compare to like what Gary's doing with social curator? And he looked at me and he said, there's so much abundance. There's room for us all. Okay. Okay. As if I was like, one, I was so inspired in that moment. I was also totally embarrassed because I was like, yeah, you're right. Care bear. Totally abundance, bro. Yeah, totally. But I walked away from that knowing there is abundance.

15:31As business owners, you can serve people when you make more money. And more money means more resources, investments, opportunities, and more ways for you to hire or outsource the impact of the lives of other people. When you make more money, other people win. And I think you should also be a little bit mindful of the language you use. For example, shifting the phrase from, we can't afford that, to, that's just not my financial priority in business right now. Ooh. Or how about this? We can't afford that. You want to know what I say? We can't afford that yet. You know, this is an intrinsic mindset shift.

16:12The word yet allows for expectations. It's coming. It's just a matter of time. Now, you can also work on an abundance mindset by finding a community of other entrepreneurs who have adapted this mindset. Engage in their conversations and activities that promote growth and possibility and abundance. I have to tell you that mindset and energy, that stuff is contagious and it's gonna support your own mindset shifts. Now I have to tell you, we talk openly about money inside of the social curator community. We have people who ask questions. We have people who admit it's been a hard year, but they're on their way to do something better.

16:46We have conversations to normalize the idea that talking about money is not a bad thing. It's not a good thing. It's just a conversation. Now the emotions that we have attached to that are different. And I am telling you, I am learning. I have not learned. I am learning, or should I say, I have not learned yet. I am in the process of learning, of disassociating my emotions to the money. Because when I look at money as a tool and as a thing, it is not a reflection of me. It is a reflection of my potential on what I'm going to do and how I'm going to use that money. We recently shared our own limiting beliefs and then we dug deep to find the source of where they stemmed from.

17:28One of our community members mentioned that money was taught to them in growing up as like something as a bargain, as mean as a control, and as something that it comes quickly and it goes quickly. Another said that she feels abundant, but then there are times where she tells herself that she will never make money with her wellness business. With an open discussion about money in our community, we're able to create resources, facilitate breakthroughs, and guide them through rewriting their story and creating a profitable business. And finally, to make this big abundance mindset shift, I want you to celebrate the success of others.

18:05Instead of feeling envious or competitive when other people succeed or they hit their desired revenue goal, celebrate them. Recognize that their success does not diminish your own opportunities. I want you to use it as inspiration. It proves that the same is possible for you. Celebrate their abundance like it's your own. I believe it opens energetic pathways for the same to happen to you. Hey, you can even take this further and seek collaboration and learning opportunities from them, right? How do we make their abundance ours? Now let's focus on the fourth shift. The fourth shift is recognizing your value and charging your worth.

18:44Now I want you to start by acknowledging your unique skills, knowledge, and experience. I want you to understand the value you bring to your clients or customers and the impact of your work that it has on their lives and their businesses. Recognizing your worth is a huge step for confidently charging what it is you deserve. Now, when I first started my very first career as a photographer, I was so panicked about raising my rates. I now look back at that and I realize that I was not worried about raising my rates as much as I was worried about associating my worth to my work. My worth as a human.

19:23Like, I didn't think, I had a lot of issues. Y 'all, let me just tell you, lots of good therapy. But at the time when I started my business, my worth wasn't worthy. That's bananas to think of, but it was manifesting in my business in the way that I saw money. You see, I couldn't raise my prices. What I had done, how did I get better? Who was I to do that? Crazy. And so I came to a happy medium that got me off the edge so that I started increasing my prices. So instead of making a big sweeping price change, I simply increased my rates$300 for every three clients. I found a way to push myself on my own terms.

20:00So after you acknowledge your worth, think of ways to effectively communicate your worth by defining your differentiating factor. Now, we know that most industries seem to be oversaturated. And you know what? Oversaturated, It's not a bad thing. Everyone's like, oh, it's so saturated. I can't stand out. Think of how you can stand out by marketing or communicating it differently than others. Okay, so during my career as a photographer, I built out a brand. And a lot of photographers were so interested in how I was able to build my business as quickly and as efficiently as I did. And so I decided to do something that I had it at the time.

20:38It's very prevalent now, But at the time, I had not seen one-day seminar workshops for photographers. I had not seen that. So what I decided to do was say, I want to host a one-day workshop for 20 photographers, and I'm going to charge$2 ,000. That's bananas. In my mind, I was like, I don't even know if anybody's going to pay this. And part of why this was happening, I was telling myself, there's more talented photographers. These other people have more experience. They've been in business longer. They've gone to photography school. We were doing it for 20 people at$2 ,000. So in one day we were making$40 ,000.

21:15Like that was crazy. That was crazy money to me, especially, especially at the time. So there we were thinking, oh, well, I'm not qualified compared to these other people. They could be paying somebody else that money, not me. But I decided to step out in faith. And I'm like, no, I think that they're going to get more than$2 ,000. They're going to build their portfolio. They're going to learn how to build a business. And so the story that I was telling myself was that I wasn't sure because I was not as qualified as other people But when I was able to market the workshop, which is what we called it It was called the workshop.

21:44We marketed the workshop not according to my qualifications I was marketing it according to what they valued Game over We sold out our first workshop in less than an hour We continued to host workshops every other month with a wait list We essentially created a pipeline of multi-six figures in less than a year by marketing and communicating the value differently. You weren't coming to this workshop because I went to a famous photo school. You were coming to this workshop because there was something you valued that you know you were going to exceed the$2 ,000 cost of admission. Okay. So making$40 ,000 in one day, it blew my mind, but it was simply educating and communicating differently than my competition.

22:31So you will also need to get comfortable discussing your pricing with potential customers or clients. I want you to practice pitching or even telling people your prices confidently and then clearly, and you do not need to justify them. You can also prepare responses to your most common objections about your prices or rates so that when somebody asks, you can respond with clarity and confidence on sales calls, in direct messages, or even in person. Look at them, you've practiced, you know. And another tip is I want you to practice your body language and your tonality as well as the words that you use.

23:00So much of communication is nonverbal. Remember, your prices need to pay more than just you. Businesses make a profit by charging enough to cover all of their costs. So let's talk about an example. A margarita in Newport Beach here at a restaurant local in Newport Beach is around $19. I know if you're not from Newport, you're like$19. What's in the margarita? Gold? No friend. Two ounces of tequila, maybe like an ounce of orange juice, two ounces of sweet and sour, maybe perhaps a half an ounce of Grand Marnier. Okay, we all know that costs about$1.39 to make when you purchase it in bulk. That's just facts.

23:37But companies, these restaurants, they need to make a profit in order to keep investing back into the businesses, back into the rent, back into employing employees and contractors. And your business is no different. Remember that. The fifth shift is to embrace growth and have trust in investments. Having good energy with the right expectations while making big investments, man, that could just be such a big difference. In fact, I'll chat here about a little bit of story. At the day of this recording, I was sitting with our video crew and I was talking about energy. And I said, we're all energetic beings.

24:09Where we put energy or who we allow to take energy from us, it takes up space in our lives. Investments are the same thing. Investments are energetic forces. The energy that we apply or the beliefs, the emotions that we apply in them, that's up to us. The investment is what it is. The energy we apply to it is on us. So investments can be filled with doubt and expectation and you're like, oh, it's gonna be a failed investment. Dude, y 'all, that is self-sabotaging. Here are a few ways you can be confident in your decision before making large investments in your business. Number one, ask yourself questions like, how is this specifically gonna help me reach my goals?