Courage, Purpose, and Profitability: Showing Up Now for Your Future Self with Amy Porterfield

0:0010 years ago, I made the decision to build my personal brand that was elevated, yet approachable, and reflected who I was, not just what I did. I created my website with ShowIt because it's true drag-and-drop freedom, so you can easily build and update your site. Plus, their real human support team, game changer. Want to try it for yourself? Head to jasminestar.com forward slash showit for a 14-day free trial and first month free when you subscribe. Welcome to the Jasmine Star Show, where today I am so proud, honored, excited, and over the moon to have my guest co-host, Amy Porterfield. Amy, welcome to the Jasmine Star Show.

0:36Thanks for having me. That was a really quick intro because I could absolutely tout about her amazingness and all the things that she does and how she's impacted my life. And I'm sure that will come up naturally. But I am in Nashville, Tennessee. This is Amy's home state now. And she has carefully curated the most incredible guests. I cannot wait to introduce them to you. But before we do that, Amy is a friend and an endorser and a champion of the Jasmine Star Show. and I am a friend, champion, endorser of online marketing made easy, her mega podcast. And so when I asked my friend to co-host a podcast with me, so I started this series.

1:16Like I'm gonna bring in these people, I'm really excited. And so JD, my husband, his business partner was like, okay, so when are you asking Amy? And I'm like, I'm not asking Amy, I'm not asking her yet. And he's like, why? And I'm like, baby, I gotta warm up to it. Like Amy's my big ask. And he's like, but Amy's your friend. Like she's gonna kill it either way. I was like, I know, but Amy's my big ask. For the record, you never asked me. I asked you. I wasn't ready. I wasn't ready. I wasn't ready. But I didn't know so much went into this. I am getting an education. I just want to say this for those who are listening and don't kind of understand behind the scenes of what it takes to have a co-host and go to another town.

1:52This is a production. It is a girl. And this woman has been working. I give you so much credit for this. I just cannot believe how much you put into this. This is why she is the guest co-host podcast is like, you have a friend who always sees the best in you and will show up. And so we'll start there. Thank you. And Amy's been on my podcast. You're now the most frequent guest on the show. I know. I'm going to get you a sash. I'm going to get you a crowd. And so we have always gone in with like a mission. We're talking about marketing updates. We're talking about your book. We're talking about New York Times bestselling book two weeks in a row.

2:29Now in paperback. Okay. The fact that you knew it was two weeks in a row, that is a good friend. Girl, I was up in your business all the time. I was like, so did we make the list? Are you going to send me a t-shirt that says New York Times? Friend of New York Times bestselling author. I don't know. I didn't get the t-shirt. I'm waiting. But I was totally about it. And we've always been super intentional with the conversations that we have. But what I wanted this podcast to do primarily was I want us to introduce the guests that you carefully curated. Like I want a little bit of a hype, but not too much.

2:58because what I really want us to do is have conversations around where we are as entrepreneurs right now. Like what is driving us? What is our mission? I think that if I was being very fair, it's easy to look at maybe what you've built or maybe what I have built. And then there's that big question mark of what's going on behind the scenes. Like let's spill the tea. Like I want this show to be like the insider look of what Amy, the Amy Porterfield is doing. But first and foremost, let's talk about the guest that you brought. Okay. Let's talk about it. So Ben Hardy. Yes. Dr. Benjamin Hardy. Yes.

3:30Benjamin Hardy. I chose Ben because of the fact that he is talking about something that scares me. This idea of 10X over 2X, these impossible goals. I am a kind of girl that sets big goals, but they still feel safe. And one thing he's going to talk about in the interview that I really want all of you to pay attention to is this idea that it is impossible for a reason. You're not supposed to know how to get there and your future self is going to dictate how you get there. That blew my mind. So this concept is new to me and it's scary to me and I want to embrace it. So selfishly, that's why I'm having a podcast.

4:07Well, let's just be real. The reason why we podcast is because it's selfish. Like I want to meet you. I want to pick your brain. And then we have Fawn Weaver. Fawn Weaver. Okay, this lady, she is going to blow our minds. She is a trailblazer. And you've heard about like going first. This woman has gone first many times. She's a serial entrepreneur. She is the first African-American woman to own a spirits company. Let's go. And the most awarded whiskey company. I mean, come on. And she has it. Okay, this is my favorite part. All female leadership team. come on okay so she's powerful she okay she's going to talk about this in the interview because i'm going to ask about it she believes that she needs to tell you all her secrets of how she's gotten where she is instead of waiting and writing a book in 20 years and telling you about them that's kind of what i want to be around right okay that's good so candace nelson candace is so interesting so we all know her from sprinkles and now the cupcake atm machine but she's going in a new direction.

5:08So not only do I want to talk about how she's built her empire and what that looked like and how she went into this very specific, you called it a category, content category market. Is that what you called it? I think so. That was the first time I had seen that. And she really is in this specific category, but she's branching out and she's pivoting. And I think a lot of our listeners want to make the pivot. And I really want to talk to her about that's looking like a rebrand, a pivot when you've been known for something for so long. Yes, I love that. Will Gazzara, am I saying his last name right?

5:39Will, yes. I love Will. Okay. If you have not read Unreasonable Hospitality, literally run. You told me about this book months ago, like months ago. It is so good. Okay. So the reason why the book is so amazing is because he's a master storyteller. He has been in the hospitality restaurant industry from a very young age. So his stories are incredible. But one thing he said in the book that I want him to talk about in the interview is no No matter what market you're in, no matter what niche you're in, you can always be in the industry of hospitality. Exactly. And that is interesting. When you first, it said, hey, what do you think about Will?

6:15And then I got into like his restaurant work. I'm like, okay, this is great. But Will does not talk about restaurants. He talks about service versus hospitality and how any business owner, you can become differentiated in your entire market by hospitality and hospitality is not reserved for hotels or restaurants. Exactly. I'm so, I actually like, I became very hype. I'm very excited. And then lastly, finally, Gary Vaynerchuk. Gary Vaynerchuk. So are you going to spill the tea? Are you going to spill the tea about me? Well, she, you guys, yes, I am. She calls him Gare Bear. Gare Bear. Gare Bear.

6:45This is her crush. If she got an abortion. No, fully sanctioned professionals, strictly professional crush. Okay. But she's a big fan. And so we got really lucky to be able to get Gary on our podcast. And I, okay, you don't know this, but I actually have been following Gary from the first day I started this business. And I have a picture with him 15 years ago. I have to find it. Why don't you tell me? You have a photo? I do. Amy, why are you just telling me this right now? I don't know what I was thinking. I might have shaped you. I was like, how do you have a photo? I don't trust her. She'll hurt me if she sees it.

7:22So I've been a fan for a long time and you're a super fan, but this man has gone against the grain. Oh, we got to talk about that. We have a theme for all of these people and it's going against the grain and talking about how they've gone against the grain. I think Gary's like the number one guy. That's just how he lives his life. So I'm really excited to dive in and talk about that with him. I'm very excited. Thank you for coming on the show. Yes. So when we look at 2024 and, you know, one of the conversations that we're going to be having with Dr. Benjamin Hardy. Yeah. Why do I, it's like, it's Dr.

7:55Benjamin. It's Benjamin. It's Ben. It's Mr. Hardy to you. When we have a conversation, we're going to be talking about building our present from our future desires and self. So actually, am I going to go there? I'm going to go there. I had said, Amy, let's have this experiment on the show where we write letters to ourselves from our, from our future selves. And we read them on the show and you're like, Jasmine, you're giving me 24 hours notice and like, whoa, this is too big of a thing. If you're at where you are right now in your business and somebody is like, Amy, where is your head? Like, what do you want to build?

8:25What are you doing? What's calling you? What is your big idea? Because people look at your business and they're like, you done made it. You could just rest out on a boat on some lake in Tennessee, sun tanning, but not you. Where are you at? What do you want to do? So here's the truth. When Jasmine asked me to write the letter, I said, I'm in a little bit of a weird place right now. I know that I'm destined for greatness in something bigger. I know that to my core. Hold on. I just want to have appreciation for you saying something that like a lot of people don't say. I know I'm destined for greatness.

8:57I just know it in my core. And that's something that years ago I would never have said on a podcast, nor would I admit even if I believed it. But now I'm owning it because I believe if I own it, other women listening will own it as well. And I believe that I need to be an example of what is possible. So I have stepped into that over the last few years. Jasmine has really seen me make a transformation around that and being more vocal. But here's the truth. There's something out there that it's going to take my current business, and I believe in a few years, is going to look very different. The scary part, and the part I'm a little bit embarrassed to say, is I don't exactly know how that's going to look or what it's going to be, but I know I'm ready to 10x.

9:36So talking to Ben is going to be a big deal because I know I'm ready for that. But here's why I know. In the last probably month, I've had three conversations with men around feminism and women and their place in this world. And they all have been a little bit negative and jarring to me. And here's the great news. All of them, I'm just going to give you the punchline, came out in a beautiful place, but they started very rocky. One gentleman that I talked to believes that men should make the final decision in a marriage. And when I heard that, it rocked me. and I told my mom, I said, mom, there's this guy that I really love online, but he made the statement that at the end of the day, the man in the marriage makes the final decision.

10:18And I did not like that. And so I went to my mom and she said, well, that's how your father feels. And I'm like, what? And she said, yeah, before I married your dad, he told me, I just want you to know, if it comes to a place in our relationship where someone can't make the decision, I am the man in the relationship, I will make it. That is my father who I love very much. So I believe when someone says, Amy, what does feminism mean to you? To me, it means that we are equal, that we all have the same place at the table. And at the end of the day, it's not the man making the final decision or the woman making the final decision.

10:52It is in a couple, it is a compromise and a respect. So I really do stand behind that women need a bigger voice and we need to find ways to help women have that bigger voice and usher that in. I believe that to my core. Ladies and gentlemen, you heard it here first. Okay. There's a future version of you that like, and not everybody agrees. It's like, so I know that, right? Including my father. Yeah. So my dad came over recently and I said, hey, dad, I had this situation and I heard that you believe this thing. And he's like, I do. Let's talk about it. And before we did, I said, are you sure you want to go here?

11:35And he said, I do. So long story short, he made his argument and I made mine. But the important part of this conversation and what's in it for the listener is that I feel very strong about helping women have a bigger voice. And so I stood up to my dad and I talked to him about why I believe that is wrong and why I believe that is so important for women to have a voice. and he has a daughter that I would want him to want me to be strong and stand up for myself and have a marriage where I'm equal in my marriage. And I had this voice and I was terrified to have the voice. I was scared to go against my dad.

12:12I was scared to tell that one gentleman that I talked about earlier that I don't agree with him. I was freaked out to have a bigger voice and to say something that you all might not agree with me about, but it is my truth. And so this is the first time that I feel like I am standing in my truth. I have a bigger message. I don't know what it's going to look like over the next few years, but there is something there. And I will say with the gentleman I talked about, it was a beautiful conversation where we were able to kind of see eye to eye around a few things. My dad and I agreed to disagree, but I think he heard me.

12:45And another conversation I had about feminism and a man felt that he was triggered by that word, wrote me a month later and said, your words change me and I'm looking at things in a different way. So I know there's some power in here. So I don't know what it is, Jasmine, but I am going to step into this in a bigger way. And I guess those listening, if you have something on your heart, something that's nagging you, something that keeps coming up, you know you want to go in a certain direction with your business. We have to listen to that. And I think it's going to take a lot of courage to step into it.

13:15so a couple like you know i'm a storyteller and so i'm picturing you and your dad in your beautiful like dining room table that's i'm picturing it around a meal and you're saying that you and your dad respectfully agree to disagree yeah but you feel heard i'm wondering no i love hobie like hobie hobie for president like we want this man to run this country where do you think he's falling in this conversation oh i know okay so funny enough hobie my husband was in another room but the door was open and he heard everything and I knew he could hear everything. And when we first had the conversation, this type of conversation in another setting, Hobie came to my defense and he said, I am always for the underdog.

13:55And I snapped at him. I didn't mean to, but I said, we are not the underdog. Stop treating me like an underdog. I am equal at the table. And it erupted in me and he's like, babe, I'm on your side. I just was meaning to say that I get this and I want to support you through it. So Hobie and I have had our own conversations, but he will 1 million percent say in our relationship, not one person makes the final decision. We come to a compromise or if someone's more passionate about it, we respect that and let that person lead. And so we are on the same page and he is 100 percent behind me. But it's funny you bring up Hobie because I make the money in our family.

14:31My husband's a retired firefighter. And recently I asked permission in a sense to make sure I didn't disrespect him. But I have this ball cap that says, make your own money and marry someone that makes you laugh. And I said, how do you feel about this hat? And he's like, I love it. But I'm about women making their own money and making their own decisions. And that does not mean we don't need men. You and I have amazing husbands that they should have a voice and they are respected in our marriages. I feel like we're the luckiest girls on the planet. I never want a day in this life without my man.

15:01However, I also believe that I am, I could stand on my own. I don't want a day in my life without a man, but I also want to stand on my own. If that is not a country music song lyric, get out of the car, go stand on the corner, go stand on the corner. Maybe that's the title of this podcast. You know, I think that when you start saying this, it is a departure from what you said in the past. Amy's business. Amy knows you want to launch a course, There's just nobody in the world who you go to. And so when you say these things, what about, so you had mentioned that somebody had said that the man needs to make a final decision, that you had a conversation with your dad and there was a third conversation where you had said something and he said it triggered and then he followed up.

15:47But what did you say? Like, what is the terminology? Like, what is Amy's belief around making money? Now, here's the thing. I want to be very clear. The rest of these podcast hosts have nothing to do with this conversation. The conversation you and I are having right now is I want us to build a time capsule. I want us to look back at this in five years and say, you went out and you did something so uncomfortable. You showed what it looked like speaking up, that you continue talking even when your voice quivered. And you said, I actually don't know what it looks like, but I'm going to say it so that somebody looks at me and speaks up when their voice quivers, that they're going to push through even though there might be a little bit of not a lot of clarity around what it is you're saying.

16:29and you're also going to say, I am okay to be disagreed with. Yes. Okay, so we're here and we're going to look back at this version of you and I am one of, like I always say, like I'm one of your dearest friends. I should say you're one of my dearest friends but I'm going to come and say, I'm one of your dearest friends and I want to be like, we're doing this and we're doing it together and you're okay. Yes, I don't know why I feel freaked out. I feel freaked out a bit. It's just, it's a departure from what I talk about. I'm not making a departure from my business. No. I'm still teaching women and men how to make money building digital courses.

17:03However, when I had that conversation with a man that said the word feminism triggers him, when I had that conversation, what I said was, first of all, why does it trigger you? And he felt, he was so honest. This man I'm talking about is a dear friend. I love him. And he has a daughter as well and a very powerful wife. And so when he said it, I was so surprised. And he said, I have an all-female leadership team. I was the only man. And I felt like I had to defend myself all the time. And I said, imagine if you were a woman because we defend ourselves on the daily. Like you experienced a little bit about what is our truth on a regular basis.

17:42And I said, why is it that you feel like you have to defend yourself versus welcome all these powerful women around you and be so excited that you get to be surrounded by all of this power? And so he was open to it. But also one thing I said to him is that I just believe that equality is so incredibly important and I do not see it on a daily basis. So we're going to need to be louder and that might trigger even more. And so I just asked him to get really clear about why it's triggering you. And so I asked more questions than I said. I don't have all the answers. And I recently I interviewed a woman who is the biggest feminist I've ever met.

18:25and she wrote a book about it and it made me nervous. I don't really have the language like she has, but I do have the passion in me. So that's another thing. Those that are listening, I don't know all the answers. I don't have all the research. I can't spew to you all the statistics about women. I just know I'm supposed to be in this place and have this conversation. And over the next year, it will evolve. I'll sound more intelligent. I'll be more confident about it. But if I do not start talking about it now, Jasmine, I will never. and that's the part I'm scared to, but that's the part that I know is necessary.

18:58And I just want to end with, again, that gentleman. You're not into it. You just got started. That good friend that said he was triggered by feminism, he definitely is such a good man that he said, I'm looking at this differently and I wanted to tell you that. He literally reached out to me. So these are good men. I love all these men I've talked about, but I also think that I have to speak up because they have a very different view of me. That, I think, keeps women down. Okay, so do you consider yourself an alpha female? I've never been asked that. I want to say yes, and I know that's not necessarily always desirable in women, but I do.

19:35Okay, and do you think that your husband is attracted to an alpha woman? He must be, because the whole story is he was married before me, and I was very good friends with his ex-wife, and she introduced us. And I've talked about that a million times. But she also was in a high-powered position when I met her. she's more alpha male so he must love it okay so here's one thing is from the outside I feel really lucky that we're having this conversation because because you have earned the right to give zero considerations to anybody so what happens is when you earn the right to be in a room on your own merit, you have the luxury of just not caring.

20:22That there was a game at some point in your previous life and career that there was the T's you had to cross and the I's you had to dot and you had to play it a certain way to get to a certain point so that you would hopefully be at the table. And then all of a sudden, you created your own game and then you played the game without any support and perhaps with a bit of poo-pooing. I'm not going to share your story because that is yours. And then all of a sudden, against every odd set against you, you don't become a formidable force in the industry. You become the person in the industry. So there is not another company, organization, person who is launching or teaching how to build a course as a career.

21:05Nobody is even close to what it is you're doing. So what happens is you become so much of an outlier that you are afforded the luxury to say, I don't care. I don't care. I'm going to win and I don't care. And so then you're saying, and what I feel from an outside friend, and I haven't said before, is that you get the opportunity to beckon and show other people what it is like to have their voice at tables when they may not be invited and when they haven't earned that right. but to speak up in that capacity. And so I don't want you stopping at all. And I just feel very thankful that that's the thing that we're talking about.

21:41But there are people here that are listening to the show and they're like, okay, I've seen what she's done in her business. And even if she doesn't know what she's talking about, how does it impact? Like, do you take into considerations like, okay, if I want to grow into this next thing, what is the business aspect of this? Or is this just like, it's like a personal thing. Like this is a personal thing. That's the business and that's what it is. Or do you think that there's something business undercurrent? Do you think your future self? Absolutely. There is a business undercurrent. I don't know what it is.

22:08I was like, share it right now. Yeah, there is something there because I believe, and this is something I got to give Donald Miller credit for because he brought this up to me and then made it known in my mind. So now I own it. But that women do things differently, not better or worse, differently than maybe men do in business. We have innate skills and part of our character that lends itself to be badasses in business that is different than men. And I would like to explore that and own it and help other women own it. Because let me give you an example. I'm very sensitive. Being sensitive tends to be more toward women than men.

22:48Not always. I never want to make that generalization. But you tend to see women be more sensitive to men. Is that true? Do you see that? Well, the only caveat I would have would be the outward manifestation of sensitivity. I think that men are very, very sensitive, but it's behind like a wall. And women will wear it on the outside. I think we're equal parts sensitive. But anyway. I love that. I think that we wear it on our sleeves a little bit more. I do at least. And so I had a business coach once tell me, that is your superpower. Because I asked, tell me how to get more mental toughness. I want to be tougher.

23:22And he said, no, no, no, no. We're not going to take away that sensitivity. that makes you who you are in business. So I want to explore that a little bit. So yes, I do believe it will find its way in my business, but in a really respectable way, because I love all men and women. And I want to be clear about that. I love men. Amy loves men. When I was little, my dad was a firefighter. And when I was little, my mom said she'd take me to the fire station. And the only way I'd stop crying is if a man held me. So let me just tell you, it's from a young age. It's like here in the podcast studio, Amy, you just have this.

23:53You were made for the South, girl. You are like the hold my door open and give me a refill. Yeah, thank you. You're asking the crew here and be like, how does my hair look? Is my mic all right? So this is not about that. And I will say that when J.D. and I are with Luna, Luna loves boys. She loves being around men. Like my kind of girl. I know. And so then I tell J.D., I was like, oh, we're raising Amy Porterfield. Hand to heaven. Hand to heaven. That is what I say. I'm like, oh, this is little Amy. Little Amy Sita. So when we talk about this undercurrent, somebody might be saying, okay, my future self, it has a calling to me.