#2061 - Whitney Cummings

24:55And me and the guy were... I was with... He's probably drunk. Like, he's probably realized he fucked up and he's drunk and he's trying to run away from the scene and the crime. And then they tackle some citizens' got him. And so, we hear. They got him. We got him. We got him. I wouldn't want Texas citizens getting me. They're more armed than most police officers here. Well, not only that, it's the lakes. Everybody's running around out there. It's like, it's fit because it's right over by a lady -girl lake. So, this guy apparently was in a high -speed chase from the police and just slammed right into a coming.

25:29Easily could have been us. It was two cars in front of us. That's fucking why. But it was boom! Like, to what... I don't think I've ever seen in person someone hit a guy with a car that hard, like up close. And it went into the passenger side. Oh, just smushed the side of this car. That's car went flying. The one car, it goes flying up in the air and the other car goes flying to the side. And then boom, the car falls down. The moment falls down, the door opens up. He's out. He's out. He's stuck. He's running. And he was dressed like he just got done playing golf. He was so weird to see. He's like wearing like a golf shirt.

26:07I love that his first instinct was, I'm just like, what did he do wrong? He just ran away. He probably had a warrant out for his arrest or something. He's probably something. Because if he's run from the cops, something was going on. When you see such a real up close, it always blows my mind. Like, when I first moved to LA, I lived right above Ari on Miller Drive, above Pink Dot, so that I could be close to the comedy store. And there's that intersection there. It's sunset in Las Deanaga. And there's all these, you know, and both people trying to take lefts are always trying to, you know, cheat the yellow light.

26:39And I'm at the northern part of the intersection. And a motorcycle is coming down sunset, fast as shit. And then someone's trying to take the left. When I tell you, I'm just, I've been in LA five days. Like, I don't make a comedian. I'm in front of Pink Dot. Like, I see this car hit the motorcycle. The guy goes up into the air. I mean, must've been 50 feet in the air. His shoes come off. I guess that's the thing when you get hit by a car. Your shoes come off, which is wild. And then comes down head first. Because your head is the heaviest. And I mean, it was so disturbing. Head broke off his butt.

27:12I mean, just head off body. And then shoes were like 50 feet away from him. Oh, yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Very dead. The deadest. Like, when you see that, you're like, I feel like that's how it would have gone into Michael Bay movie. Or I don't know, that just feels a little wild when you actually see it up close. You know, like the sounds, the crunching, the thuds, you're like, oh, that's just a body. The thing is, it's kind of extraordinary. How little car accidents we have. I mean, you think about how many people are just so distracted. And how crazy the act of getting on to this concrete surface.

27:50With this thing that's rolling around with a combustion engine. And we, and you're just letting normal people drive them around. It's kind of a miracle how cooperative we all are. It is kind of weird. It's kind of weird. But the stakes are so high. I mean, in terms of like the having to pay for it. Like I got enough car accidents in my 20s that I was like, I don't have that kind of money. It's like, it's too much of a hassle. Well, it's just sketchy. You're relying on other people. And every now and then there's one guy that's got to get their own time. Fucking cut in front of everybody. You watch and I'm like, oh, look at this guy in the pickup truck.

28:20Jesus Christ. Yeah, I was thinking because like you can see so much carnage online now. Like in my algorithm, I guess, I don't know enough comedians sent me videos of people getting murdered. You might have a terrible. It's just like butts and like car accidents and how the Disney castles are made of dicks. Like, he said from Tripoli. Did you know that Tripoli has 12 podcasts? Yeah, at least.

28:52I'm going to get burnt, oh no. And so, yes. So Tripoli sends me all this stuff. But yeah, the Disney castles being made of dicks. It is a compelling case. But I think it was probably more that they didn't pay their animators and the animators. Like, fuck you guys. We're just going to make the, you know, I'm not totally aware of that one. I think I don't remember it. Let's pull that one out. Oh, Disney castes made of dicks. Let's go. Well, there's a lot of wild stuff from the old Disney stuff. You go back in the old, old Disney. You guys part of the party. The brutal. I know. You might want to take the obviously Jewish person's nose down a little bit.

29:25Yeah. There was one where there was a, it was like a big bad wolf one and it used to be a Jewish person. And then they switched it to a wolf later. Like, what? And it's like cheap, but like won't pay the price for the baguette for the little red riding hood. You're like, what? Yeah, but like there's, there's the, I think it's the little mermaid, the spears looking like dicks. I think they probably just didn't pay their animators and the animators were like, all right, we're just going to make everything look like a dick. Some people do see dicks and everything though. This episode is brought to you by Buffalo trace distillery.

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31:40The video you posted got taken down. I was just going to play that one. I posted it. It's been removed. Which one was that one about this on this topic? On the dick. She has a video that I was just going to like use that as an example, but it's been taken They take all my stuff down. I hear some interesting stuff. I just found that. Marshmallow cannon. What? What on? I mean it should show. No. Oh, what? Okay. That's 100 % a dick squirting marshmallows. I don't know a little mouse. She's still over this mouse. It's that. Okay. That's a dick. That's 100 % a dick. It's like the balls of the bottom of it.

32:25It doesn't even notice the balls. That is not a coincidence. That's 100 % a dick. Look up the mini and Mickey mouse. That one is the one that really kind of put me over the egg. Yeah. That's someone being sneaky and putting in like a little easter egg. Yeah. They didn't get paid overtime. That's a dick. Yeah. And now the Disney employees are trying, the animators are trying to unionize. I'd be shocked if they succeed. They're probably just going to have AI do it. You could also just go to images. The thing is AI is so good now. These animators are on shaky ground. Yes. Correct. What happened with the actor strike?

32:59Did they settle that? Is that over? Yeah. They settled it. Oh. Do mini and Mickey dicks. Mini and Mickey dicks. Dicks. Oh. It's right there. Go to the one two three four. Like six over on the top. Yeah. One more over. Sorry. That one. Yeah. Oh, Jesus Christ. That's her dress. What the fuck? Okay. It's a little hot. Come on. I mean, that's insane. And he's got his hand on her dick. I know. She's got a giant heart on. That is 100 % a heart on. That doesn't even make sense as a dress. It's so straight into his mouth. I mean, just try to imagine that as a dress. It doesn't even make sense. Yeah. Like, where's her arm?

33:38Oh, it's around his neck. Who cares? Where her arm doesn't make sense. I know. It's a heart. Where's her right arm? It's a hard one to decide. Oh, they're both around there. Yeah. She's hugging him. And that's her shoulders, supposedly. Okay. Kind of. Kind of. It's a tough one. That's a dick. It's way more of a dick than it is her arm around his shoulder. Uh -huh. You know, if it's one of two things that looks so much like it, and his hands on it, like he's stroking it. And also the little lines. I don't know. She wants to have a puffy shoulder shirt on like that. Is that consistent? Not. Like that.

34:14And then it's also like the little ridge on the top. Yeah. That's the feeling that's the six -foot dick. It's definitely a dick. Oh, no. No. That's 100 % a dick. Oh, no. Yeah. I'm going to get a dart in my neck any minute. Disney's going to get us. Yeah, they're already in trouble. They fucked up. They went too far. You were telling us about the South Park thing? Oh, my God, dude. Jamie, have you seen the new South Park? I definitely saw clips of it. It is so funny. I mean, first of all, Cartman has been replaced by a black trans.

34:48And the, like the ulterior universe or whatever. And the whole thing, really in size of commentary, obviously, they always do such a good job with this. It's the pandaverse. The pandaverse. It's such a great name. All the handyman, the handyman or the richest people. Because no men know how to do anything anymore because they went to college. So it's all about how college has made us stupid. And we need handyman to do everything now because we're using Siri and whatever. So there's the handyman bought Instagram and now is like going to space because he's just a billionaire. And then Cartman is a Catherine Kennedy who runs Disney.

35:26But Rand Lucasfilm and whatever. And her whole thing is just make it, make it a girl and make her gay. Make it a girl and make her gay. It's for every movie they're bitching. And she gets like served food at a restaurant. And she's like, I told you to make it a girl and make it gay. It's hilarious. It's so well done. Yeah, how did that, how did they people that are that goofy getting control of media like that? I think that like there's a really, I think we're going to look back at this time and go like, remember when we thought 300 comments on Twitter represented everyone. Right. Remember when we had that confirmation, but we got scared of a bunch of tweets, half of which might just be bots or truly crazy people.

36:11Yeah. You know, I don't know what the statistic is now. Also people crazy enough to be commenting on things all day. Yeah, good or bad. The people that I know that are on Twitter all day commenting on stuff, they're mentally ill. That's right. Like the ones I know are mentally ill. I know they're all fucked up. I know they're medicated to shit. And then they're on there freaking themselves out arguing with people all day. I think not only are they medicated on whatever they're on, but also I think Twitter is the drug. It's drug. I mean, you get that hit of self -righteous indignation. It's like the people who write in to complain about their Mr.

36:42Good Bar being wrapped weird. You know what I mean? And for actors and people in show business is almost like you're testing yourself out, like writing scripts for yourself to be like a hero in the scene. And like I think a lot of people need to be heard. Totally get that. Yeah, that's real too. That's real too. I mean, there's a real application for it in terms of your ability to communicate about things and learn more about other people's perspectives if you can cultivate a good group of humans. But if you're famous, that's not tenable. Like there's no, there's too many people. If you're dealing with a product like a Disney film, there's just too many people.

37:20There's too many people. You're never going to be, and you're just going to encounter what you encounter. It's random. It's not like you're getting the ones from like I went to Stanford and asked the psychologist what their opinion on, no, no, you're just kidding, fucking. You're getting the wildest of wild opinions from who knows how many different groups of people. And you just, whatever you scroll into, that's what you read. Do you think there'll be a day where we look back and we go like, remember when you could just like be on Twitter all day? Like, is it going to be the way we are with cigarettes now?

37:53Remember you used to be able to smoke inside. No, because people are just going to keep doing it. Because it doesn't physically feel bad, even though it is bad. We're really bad at things that don't like get like burn our fingers. Ouch. We're really bad at just continuing to do certain things like like a Twitter type deal or just any kind of online social interaction is so different than regular human interaction. And if you get used to doing it all the time, it kind of like reprograms the way you communicate with people, period. It's just like the new normal. Yeah, you see people like spillover, like Twitter talks spillover in real life with horrible consequences.

38:34It's like my favorite, Mike Tyson quote, is the problem with people today is you can talk shit and I can punch in the face. Yeah. And then you see him talk shit in person and it doesn't go so well. Yeah, that's real. I mean, you're supposed to have consequences for your behavior. Like a bunch of my friends that are parents say that like bullies will come in and they'll say the craziest shit just because they've been on Twitter online or on those video games where you're like to like talk shit. And then you go into the real world and it's a little different. Yeah, there's plenty of those videos on my Instagram too.

39:01People getting fucked up. You know, I was thinking about this because I was like, is it new that we are able to see horrific shit just like constantly? Yeah. But I was thinking of like what are the other like collective visual like traumas we've had that we've seen. And I was I'm a little I kind of miss this a little bit, but I remember hearing about it because I know older brother. Remember the challenger explosion. Oh, yeah. It makes me I've been trying to write a joke about it that they rolled in TVs into classrooms to watch this with the teacher. Remember, there was like a teacher on it and they showed it and everybody just watched this teacher explode in the sky.

39:38I remember not knowing exactly what was going on at first going what's what's happening? Like why is there like so many different like there was like one going this way and one going that way. And then they started talking about oh no, oh no. And then you realize like oh shit, that thing blow up. Because do you remember watching it first like it didn't I didn't know exactly what was happening. I watched it recently and kind of was like I remember watching it look on the news when I was really young and not understanding what was going on. Can you pull up the challenger explosion? By the way, that I could apparently could have been mitigated.

40:12People knew that there was problems with the O rings and really you could think how many fucking people are involved in those things. And how bad the government is at almost everything. Yep. Almost they they looked for the teacher. It was like this whole thing. Look at this. Okay. People gathered in theaters. Yeah.

40:39Oh.

40:47Oh. Oh. Good job, Ethan. Watch that live.

41:04What a weird thing we try to do. Fill giant tubes up with combustible liquid and then light an explosion and shoot them up into the fucking sky. What are the chances of this work? Get out of Earth's gravity. Well, it's definitely he's worked again at times. I know, but it's just like. Look at the amount of power you're dealing with. That's what's so bonkers. The amount of thrust that you need to escape our atmosphere and escape our gravity. It's just so nuts. And then how? How quick was that? Did they feel it? Nah. They might have. That was my obsession. I watched a video on the implosion of the submarine the other day.

41:47Like what? Can't get enough. Can't get enough. I can't get enough of this thing. I love the billionaires now have to do broke shit. It makes me think about as gold diggers because gold diggers now don't even get to do cool stuff anymore. It used to be like you go to Monaco. You go to like, you know, we're going to go to St. Bartz. Now you got to get a submarine. You got to go look at a bunch of trash at the bottom of the ocean. Who was telling us about people that are paying to go over to Russia? They're paying to go over to Ukraine and fight on the frontline to let them shoot guns. Oh, it's telling us all now.

42:23You don't remember someone telling us? Maybe someone told me off air. Maybe it was a different thing. But they were saying that they know someone who literally paid to go and fight for Ukraine against Russia. They went and they allowed them to operate guns and shit. I was like, what is... I said this is why I wanted to bring it up because I'm like, is that a bullshit story? But if you frame this like... I feel like you frame what let you do for free at this whoopsies. But everything is even back then they're so corrupt. That is such a corrupt country. And there's so much shady... My friend, what do you want to do?

42:58You have money we give you, gondos you to them. And then the next thing you know, some fucking frack kid whose dad's got an oil baron. Yes, some rich kid. It's over there, fucking... Okay, get me out of here. And then you get him a chance to take him off. And then you get him a chance to take him off. Trying to get content for his TikTok. That's just what we need. I think people have done something like that. I think RFK's son went over to fight. The kids are. I feel like there had to be like a... He didn't tell anyone. He just went over and did it. And then came back. He didn't even tell his dad.

43:33His dad didn't. RFK Jr. did not know. Can you just show up in your like, hey, I'm down your side? Well, no. I don't know how he applied. But I think he was in some sort of special forces group. There are very rich Ukrainians doing this. I don't know if it's a good American. Okay, maybe that's what it is. Yeah, this article on NPR says is like billionaires that are leading battalions. But they might also have some sort of... Well, they might be training or something like that. Oh, but isn't that just like the guy that they blew up? That's who was throwing the other side. Right, but he was a billionaire that ran his own army.

44:09The Wagner. Yes, I'm a businessman. And now I'm a commander of a military unit in Ukraine. Like, are you having that much trouble getting chicks as a billionaire? Yeah, but that might be a different thing. That might be a thing where he just felt like he has to take up arms because Russia is invading. I get that, by the way. I do feel like, isn't it... I mean, I texted a lot of my friends about this. I'm like, is today the day? Like, is today the day we're all going to war? Like, there is a little bit of... Way more than ever before. Way more than... I mean, I'm looking at bunkers at 2am. I'm kinda...

44:42Yeah. I mean, what if draft happens? Can you imagine our 18 -year -olds going... TikTok kids getting drafted. I can eat and tidepods going over there. Yeah, draft is a real... It would be a real issue with the morale of this country. And the suspicion of like the government doing unethical things and the trust and whether or not these kids can even survive. Yeah. It's just survived boot camp. Yeah. I mean, this is... Survive filling out the form saying they're gender. This is the softest... The softest generation it's ever existed. It's scary. It's wild, how quickly it happened. It really is wild.

45:19I mean, if this was engineered by Russia, good job. They nailed it. You fucking nailed it. They nailed it. Everything that everybody wanted, a complete lack of faith in the government. Whoever put Roundup in the water so that everybody went... Yeah, fluoride. Yeah, the flow between the fluoride and the Roundup and all the endocrine disruptors... They did a great job. They turned us into such buses. There's a few people that are out there fighting the good fight and trying to resist, but, you know, ultimately they're outnumbered. I feel like there's a backlash happening, you know? I feel like it's interesting.

45:55Like being pregnant, you really... I've started getting like obsessed with, you know, everything you put in your body, you know? And just the idea of just drinking water. It's like a full -time job. Like, where am I getting my water? Right. I got it because it's either my choices are fluoride or microplastics. And I'm not... I'm not having a baby with a small tank. I'm telling you that right now. Yeah, do you ever check yourself for Thalates while you were... Shit. Nope. No. Yeah. What do I do then? I did the Thalate age test by a lot of people. Thalates are microplastics. It's like chemicals that leach out of plastics.

46:28I mean, I for sure got them. Well, everybody else. No way, I don't. Yeah. There was a study that they did recently that was like, what is it? Was the number like 90 something percent of people at Thalates in their body? Something nuts. Also, there's this guy I don't want to plagiarize his work. Keshief Khan, he wrote that DNA waybook about how their micro... The forever chemicals in women's yoga pants. Oh, right. In the clutch. It's in astroturf. What about fucking baby powder? Dude. We used to put it in our underwear before basketball games. Yeah. 50...there's been 50 ,000 lawsuits. Yeah. They've paid, I think over eight or nine billion, which is probably nothing to them.

47:07But women getting ovarian cancer from the testus in it. Yeah. And then also the miners of the talc. Yes. Yeah, that's what I was reading that talc and the spestus are often in the same spot. And they don't filter it out well. To what? Like, they don't even test to see if the talc has the spestus in it sometimes. Johnson and Johnson's gotten away with some wild shit. Well, that's a wild one. I just...how did they know? Like, this is what I want to know is did they know? Like, did they know that sometimes their talc has the spestus in it? It was just too problematic to sift it out and figure out what's what?

47:44What is the deal with that? Find out what's the deal with talc and spestus. The miners, I think the miners definitely can play. My guess is that is a similar trajectory to the... Oh, here it is. Because talc and the spestus are minerals found close together when talc is mined and may contain traces of his bestus. Talc and powder are still in the ingredient in the number of cosmetic brands as recently as... November of 2020, a study found that 14 % of the talc containing makeup tested contained spestus. That's wild. Can I tell you, a lot of my girlfriends, when they act insane, I ask a couple questions.

48:17Like, what birth control are you on and what hair products and makeup are you using? Because you're just putting chemicals in... I mean, your skin's your biggest organ, right? Right. You're just the amount of chemicals women just put on their bodies in their bodies. They knew for decades that is bestus lurked in its baby powder. Oh my god. Unreal. That's crazy. This is Reuters. I want to say it was in St. Louis, but it was over 50 ,000 lawsuits. Oh my god, that's so crazy. Johnson Johnson didn't tell the FDA that at least three tests by three different labs. From 72 to 75, it found that bestus in his talc.

48:52In one case, that levels reported as rather high. Who's this rather? This is rather in that context. What kind of numbers we were talking about? They were rather high. Also, and then as soon as the Johnson and Johnson vaccine came out, we just flocked. That's a trusted name. That was the first one they pulled. I did it. Did you do that one? Who knows what's even in my belly? Let's take on the positive side. How come in comic books, whenever someone gets exposure to radiation or some... They get superpowers? That's true. I got pregnant for it. This is a vaccine injury, 100%. Is it supposed to be the opposite though?

49:34It's supposed to stop women from... Yeah, I guess women were having a lot of fertility problems. And pregnant women that took it there, placenta's were hardening. There was a lot of sketchy stuff happening. Yow. Yeah, fertility is going down in a way that's super alarming. Do you think people will be more skeptical of novel medical interventions in the future? If something like this comes up in the future, I don't think people will be as quick to line up. I think fear does wild stuff to people. But you've never had that much of a reason to distrust the medical establishment as we do now. Just like the videos that you could watch of them saying it's 100 % effective, it's 80 % effective.

50:16Effective against preventing severe hospitalization or death. I think that at least the people that I know are very suspicious of stuff like that. But the thing that really freaks me out is even natural remedies are starting to be bought up by these corporations. So, you know, Bragg's apple cider vinegar, Bill Gates bought it. Oh god. Bill Gates now owns one of the few natural healthy tonics we had. And he's putting the apples in it with the... Oh, the appeal? The appeal, the creepiest. Oh, what is that? That's like a coating that they spray on the outside of vegetables. It's like some smegma to keep the apples preserved longer.

50:54Is it just apples? It's just so obsessed that he didn't invent apple computers. It's just poisoning everything apples. He just has to. But yeah, it's like for Costco apples to stay fresh or longer. But what is in it? I would love to know. I would love to know. These motherfuckers, they can... They get stuff out there before anybody's aware that these things are a problem. And then like years later, like, what's in it? Talk asbestos. Yeah. And then you don't find out to later. So it's like talking about this and just being like, a lot of being suspicious about like, should apples last for four weeks?

51:25I feel like Bill needs a hug. Like, why are you working so hard? Did you see the video of him against trees? What? Bill Gates, look at Bill Gates against... Oh, he thinks he should bury all the trees. He's like, I don't plant trees. Like, he doesn't believe in trees. That's someone needs to blow this guy. I volunteer his tribute. I'll jump on this for me. I don't know what... I mean, between... And then I guess he owns half of the McDonald's potatoes for the french fries? Bill Gates gets real about climate change. Planting trees is complete nonsense. But the end of the oil and gas era is finally in sight.

52:03Planting trees is complete nonsense. We don't think planting trees is good. Aren't planting trees? Don't they make oxygen? How would it be nonsense to have something that filters carbon dioxide and makes oxygen? I think he's done too much of that appeal. Planting circling that Microsoft founder Bill Gates supports chopping down 70 million acres of trees. But the truth is more complicated. Oh. Oh, is it? What's complicated? Shock. There's a video of him like being very glib about it. Promoting deforestation, okay? What? Cool cause. Well, I think he kind of wants to regulate the weather, right? The startup company is a unique concept, the removal of trees to protect California forests.

52:45Well, there's something to the removal of dead trees. And that's something that actually Trump talked about when the wildfires were hitting California, he said he was going to cut off their funding if they didn't take care of their forests. But I don't think that's what he's saying. No, I don't think that's what he's saying. I don't think he's saying like... What you're supposed to do is trees die, right? And they die and then they fall and you get dead fall. And that stuff dries out and that stuff becomes highly flammable. So if you got a gang, like there was an issue back a few years ago, there was a thing called the bark beetle.

53:15Do you remember that? It was up in like... What's that leg? Big bear. It's like up in that area. So... So my friends go to relapse. No one goes to Big Bear and comes back so far. Big bear is a crazy place. It is. So this beetle was consuming the bark of these trees and killing these trees so you had like... You know, who knows how many thousands and thousands of dead trees that were essentially kindling. And so when a wildfire happened, it just burned right through everything. Because nobody had ever removed the dead trees. Yeah, you got to do that. And that's the thing about a lot of these forests is that if you got a lot of...

53:55But it's also like the amount of resources involved in removing all those dead trees. Who knows how many acres? I mean, I live in wildfire land, as you know, to Penguins, California. I do like voluntary equine evacuation with L .A .F .D. and they would fight from my house because I'm kind of right at sort of the end of like 170 acres, like in a hollow kind of thing. So they would just come in and fight. So they, you know, come over sometimes and I was talking to them on these firefighters about like, you know, like, oh, the forest fires and he was like, look, that's gonna get me in some trouble.

54:27Maybe that he's like, look, most of the fires in California are homeless people. But we can't tell people that or else people would just start taking baseball bats unless people constantly, you know. So it's like, a lot of it is like fires or smoking or little campfires. Camp fires. Yeah. Camp fires. Yeah. Well, if your life is so fucked up that you're, you know, in a fucking tent on the middle of a grassy hillside and you're doing fentanyl, you're probably not so responsible with fire. The homeless camp wars in Venice where they were just throwing like Molotov cocktails at each other and just set each other on fire.

55:02I mean, it was the Gaza strip there for a minute. It's just so nuts that it happens so quick. So again, Russia, good job. You guys nailed it. Yeah. Like whatever you did to our education system, whatever you did to crush our faith in democracy. What else is it? Amazing work. Yeah. And just a testament to how like one sick bill will put you out. Like what? And people can't afford housing. There's that, but it's mostly mental illness and drug addiction. It's mostly that. There's people that are down there luck, but those people usually find a way back. It's mental illness for the most part and drug addiction.

55:40And, you know, and also the community that comes from a bunch of people that are also just as fucked up as you. People like to be a, if you're a fucking mess, you like to be around other masses. You don't want to be a mess and be around Jocco. You know, we can't know about 4 30 in the morning and working out. And like you want to be a mess around other non -ambitious people that are just laying around. And that's their community. It's pretty well in California. You can be homeless. I mean, the homeless people in California, they're not trying their, they've got ring lights. They've got cell phones.

56:11They're getting their morning sunlight. It's not that cold out. It's not that big a deal. They get a 24 hour gym membership. They're in shape too. I had, I had my, do they look great? That gym membership. They're barefoot. They're grounding in the grass. Probably healthier than most of us. They're probably living the lives that we're all trying to learn to live from these, you know, high performers. But I got my laptop stolen out of my car outside the improv on Melrose. And, and this guy, I wasn't going to fight with him about it, but he was like cut, he was ripped. He looked great. He looked like Goggins.

56:43I mean, he looked great, you know. And it's just kind of a lifestyle at this point. I don't think they're trying to change it. Well, also, if you steal anything that's less than $900, they don't even arrest you. That's right with the stores and stuff. Which is fucking, just dumb as shit ever. And then these mass looting's were these kids organized. Oh, yeah. That's crazy too. Yeah, yeah. It's like, this is a complete collapse of society that's happening while we're here. So it's hard to really understand the scope of it. Unless you could have like a go back in time machine and like see what those same streets looked like 20 years ago.

57:20See what these same stores were like 20 years ago. And then see what's going on now. It's like, whoa. This is like a fucking Robocop movie. This is something's wrong here. Real wrong. Just gangs of people. Yeah. Organizing to steal part. And then what do they do? They put on eBay. They just are. Whatever you got to do, man, I mean, it's like with what's going on in this country. I'm always like, I'm always like good for you guys. Good for you to steal my laptop. I don't know my dad. I didn't want. What are you saying? I'm good for you. One time, uh, Janine Garofalo was on stage and she goes, yeah, I lost my, um, my joke notebook in St.

57:57Louis. Uh, so if you see anyone bombing around town, let me know. There is something when you lose something that has jokes in it. I just want that back because I don't want people to see my jokes in progress. Oh, yeah, that's true too. Or they're just the notes. Yeah. You know, it would be an evidence in a crime. I'm like, I'm definitely going to jail if anybody sees my joke notebook. It would be like one of them physics papers though, like we like, I don't know what they're writing. Exactly. What is this? It's a friend of yours. Arrows pointing to Dix and that's arrow pointing to clouds. I have been kind of writing in a notebook recently, jokes because like, you know, you get on your computer and then you get a pop -up out, you get a, you get a, like, I'll just research this and then you're in like a wormhole of Disney Dix for two hours.

58:41You know, so I've started writing more and I've got this joke notebook and I'm like, oh, God. But I don't have my name on it or anything. You don't want to lose it. Well, yeah, I mean, it's a portrait of insanity. Do you take photos of each page? I should do that. Yeah. That's really smart. Then you could just open a mops, Brad. You can read it. Sometimes I'll do it like in my notes app, like write jokes out and stuff. Yeah. There's some applications that will take written handwriting and convert it into text. That's really smart. I know that remarkable that tablet thing does that. It'll do that for you.

59:15You ever seen that tablet? No. It's pretty cool. It's a tablet that it looks like a Kindle, so it looks like white paper and you write on it. With a pen. With a stylus? Oh, nice. But you have multiple pages. So you write like that and it looks like paper, but then it'll convert it to text for you. It converted to a type font. That's crazy. But the thing is it's like you could have a thousand pages in that easy. And you have a little folder. And you could have folders and all sorts of different things with it. I'm kind of like, I don't know, I'm a little old school with like I like having a piece of paper and tearing it out.

59:56I've got a few stages and put in my pocket and I don't know. There's just still a little attachment. Well, they do say that there's something and I wonder if it would be the same on a tablet. But they do say there's something when you physically write something down, it's better for your memory. Yeah. Part of writing it out is just remembering it. I think for me. And then I'll say it. Like I saw Jay -Z somewhere say if you say something 18 times in a row, you'll remember it. Whether that's true or not. Like that's his process. And then I kind of started doing that. Well, he famously doesn't write his wraps down.

1:00:27That's wild. Yeah, he keeps it all in his head. That's insane. It's pretty wild, pretty genius. But I know a lot of comics you do that. Really? Yeah, there's a lot of comics you don't write at all. That's crazy. They could go on stage doing an hour and a half and it's all in their head. Yeah. I'm trying to get better at that. I'm trying to get better at that. I think there's two, both things are good. I think a lot of those comics probably would benefit from writing too. Yeah. I would get some extra bits. Yeah. Sometimes it drives me nuts when I'll try to come up with stuff on stage or allow myself.

1:00:58But if I don't record it, I'm like, ah shit. I was so in the moment. I was so hard to be president and then I'm like, I don't remember any of it. Did you do bottom of the barrel Tuesday night? I did. I had the best time. It's fine, right? I had never done it before. And it was like, I kind of feel like you'll have a better metaphor for this. But it's almost like doing fat man is like doing your cardio, writing jokes is like, you know, you're, you know, lifting and then bottom of the barrel is like stretching or something. Like it should should be a part of what you do as a comic. It's good to just be on a tightrope.

1:01:32Yeah. And not having any idea where you're going with things. And then totally going the wrong way and trying to bail yourself out. I got like three things out of it. Yeah. You're just like jumping off a cliff and flying and sort of because I think that I get a little bit after I have a special come out, I start going, okay, my next special is going to be about this. And then I kind of like have tunnel vision about what the theme is going to be. Right. And someone just, Hamas Christmas was literally one of them. It was like to just riff on that. I never would have thought to write about that because I'd go too touchy to this.

1:02:02Yeah. It makes you braver and, um, and it was like a muscle I hadn't flexed in a really long time. It's also a unique situation because the audience knows that you're doing it. And you are clearly reaching it. You're not preparing it all. You're reaching into this thing. You're pulling out this piece of paper and there's this moment where you might have something on that. Yeah. You know, like, oh. Yeah. You know. Yeah. Christmas with the relatives or, oh, whatever it is. Yeah, totally. You're like, oh, okay. And then they get to see this process of you fucking around. Yeah. It just was, it also, I think sometimes you get into this, whether it's feedback from the internet or from other people, when people kind of tell you what kind of comic you are, you're kind of like, oh, that's not a topic I would do.

1:02:44That's a topic Tim would, Dilla would do. Right. And then I'm kind of like, no, I could totally weigh in on that. Right. But like, I don't only have to talk about relationships or being a woman like, oh, that worked. And it'll also get you out of whatever might be rigid in, like, this is the worst when you see a comic they have a theme and they're kind of rigid with it. And it looks, and you feel like, oh, man, you should be, you should be a little more loose. Yeah. You're more fun to watch. You know, like, you're a little too buttoned down with this thing. Yeah. And it also was like, you know, the topics were so incendiary and wild, you know, to just the permission from the audience.

1:03:20Like, go there. Yeah. You like, go. Don't, like, don't hold back. Don't censor yourself. Yeah. It was just like, oh, okay, you guys want me to go here, right? Yeah. Like, it's just this, like, really cool, like, jump kind of. What's also, there's 110 people there, you know, it's a small room. That room is my favorite. It's a great little room. The fact that you made, I mean, I was thinking about this last night when I was like, how does a club that's only what two years old? Not even. It's not even a year old. I feel like it has so much history. I know. And like, soul. Well, I think it's because of the building.

1:03:51I think, I think there's a reality about buildings. And that's a 1927 theater. And I think there's something about old buildings. They, I think memories are like legitimately burned into objects. That's fascinating. I think. I'm not 90 % sure. I think this idea that things don't have something that's akin to consciousness. I think it's arrogant. Yeah. That building, I know it's like wishful thinking because it's my place and all that jazz. But when we opened it, I felt like it was happy we were there. I felt like even when I looked at it, even when I looked at it, I felt like it was talking to me.

1:04:28Like when I was going through it and like trying to figure out how I could do this and do that. I'm looking around at it. It was like, come on. Let's do it. What was that documentary ages ago called What the Bleep Do We Know? Yeah. And remember the particles were in the water. And when they were nice to it, the particles changed. And when they were mean to it, I think the particles, you know, there is... Yeah. I don't know if that's real. That guy also ended up in the next game called. Yeah. There was also another person that was talking during that, I think she calls herself ramp -thaw. And she's channeling like a thousand year old alien or something.

1:05:05Sure. So like her real name was different. But when she talks, she talks in this wonderful way. And she's channeling. Yeah, yeah, yeah. So there's a lot of wack shit in that film. Okay, so they were doing the secret, got it. But there's just this feeling and it's either way you've decorated the place, the people you've chosen to be there. It just...it feels like...it feels like... It feels like...sounds corny. It feels like home. Yeah, well that's what we wanted. We tried to...we did everything we could to make it as comfortable for comedians as possible. And it's more fun. And to help promote the art form and help promote up and coming artists.

1:05:42That's the big one. It's like everyone who works there is a door person. They all audition with their acts, the people that are going up on open mic nights. They have two nights of open mic nights to go up. Monday and Tuesday. Dude, was it Miles? Was it Miles? I've seen Miles destroying in the little boy and then the next day I walked in and he was the door guy and I was like, you were the guy who could hardly follow last night? Yeah, it's nice. And I think my biggest concern when you were building and I was like, what if Joe doesn't like running a business? It's just like a hassle. It's just like a hassle.

1:06:17I have employees and they want to do other things. Yeah. But like everyone is like part of this mission there. Everyone feels like a family. No one feels like they're just like there to get some cash. I think everybody realizes it's a very special thing that we've been able to put together. And the fact that the idea to put it together was really just to make, it wasn't like a business idea. Like this would be a great way to make money. It was the opposite. It's like I just don't want to lose any money. But let's put together this business. Let's put together this center, this one hub where the comedians can just be free, have fun, and feed off of each other and bang joke ideas around with each other in the green room.

1:07:01And you know, you just watch each other do sets from the balcony. Watching you and I mean being in the green room and like, because I mean, look sometimes you're kind of in a lot of clubs. You're in a hallway and there's like people coming by and the way that you've like really incubated comedians so that they like feel safe and feel like, you know, they can be themselves, especially before they go on stage. Like, you know, Ron White came off stage and he just done this bit. He was trying to explain why it didn't go how he wanted to go. Watching Ron White have a joke not go well for the first time in 30 years was funny to watch.

1:07:34It was like, I just bought him for the first time. And his fucking is complete accepting of the bombing. Like the way he was saying that that fucking joke didn't get us single laugh. They all agreed. And we were trying to tell him like, I don't understand why you thought that was funny. Well, clearly you were right. Like, he just told the joke and joke us. Yeah, I would have advised you again doing that joke.

1:08:05But then we came up with alternative ways to do that joke where we're ridiculous. And then you like went into this whole other thing and like basically I just watched you put a whole chunk together, you know? And like we were all just there, like just supporting each other and kind of like writing. And everything's like, you know, that's the best feeling in the world when you're sitting around a much people. You know you can't hurt the feelings. You know you're not walking on eggshells. Yes. And you know you're around a place of love. That's it. And just like, just go for it. Everybody's no tension in that room.

1:08:38Everybody's smiling. We're so lucky. The best. I feel so lucky sometimes. Like it's just I look forward to it so much. It's like medicine. When I'm not there for a few weeks and then I come back to town and I hang out in the green room again. Everybody's like, hey! You built this thing though and there's also it made me realize like you have to be around the absence of something to realize there was a presence of something else that became so normal. Is there's an absence of predatory energy? I know that might sound weird, but like the comics, the... For whatever reason. Nobody's trying to get something from you.

1:09:10If you're not trying to get you on their podcast, everyone's kind of just trying to get near you. No one's trying to get a picture with you. There's just a agreement. We're just here to get better. And we're just we're a family in here and we're not like trying to do anything except get better. Right. There's always that weird moment where someone like weasels into your conversation at the store and you don't know who that person is. And they're like, hey, I'd love to talk to you about this project. Or there's just a feeling of like this feels like work. Right. For some reason we're just faking this.

1:09:38It's also the Hollywood environment too because everybody kind of has that attitude all day long. How can you help me? Yeah. That's a transactional existence. And these people are always looking to make these transactions. That's right. And then move up the social ladder. There was also a really cool thing last couple nights I went up in the little boy, both nights. And talk to a couple people in the audience. There were like four people each night that were in from Australia just to come to the mothership. Wow. They came just to come for the week to come to all the shows. There was another guy, one of the guys that came from Australia, he did a road trip in America.

1:10:15And I was like, oh, what's your trip? And he was like, I went to Austin, Ohio, in New York. That's America. That's pretty much America. There was no... I was a little apart of Ohio. There was no... It was like a family, family thing or something like that. But he'd know Disneyland and Florida, no University of New York studios in LA. It was just Austin, Ohio, New York. I thought that was really cool. That it must be wild to go from one country. If you've never been to America and you see that it's basically Europe. There's different countries here. Every state feels like a different country. It's a different country.

1:10:47New York is such a different country than Texas. So, I try. LA, California is so different than Texas. LA is also so different. LA feels like a weird simulation now. Like, when's the last time you were on Sunset Boulevard? It's been a few months, but last time I was there, I was like, Jesus, this is weird. It feels different. How so blues is gone? It feels like it could fall apart at any minute. It feels like something could go sideways at any minute. And no one's going to stop it. And it's just reliant upon the good nature of people. It just doesn't seem like people have as much restraint anymore.

1:11:21People are more desperate. There's more tension and anger. I mean, so many people lost everything during those two years. That's right. So many people. That's right. And then the business that was somewhat functioning, Hollywood didn't work for two. And then, I mean, because people think about Hollywood and they think about the annoying actors and the writers and the producers and the directors. But it's mostly crew guys. It's mostly the electric guys, the camera guys. They're making $100 a day max and they live out in Santa Clarita. Like those are the ones that just truly will never come back.

1:11:54Right. And then this last strike put another fucking nail in that. That's right. Because both strikes. It could not be in production for four years, basically. I mean, the city has been disemboweled. Yeah, they were talking about just how much the strike cost. Los Angeles. Just the strike. Yeah, it's billions. Yeah. And a lot of production actually get ready. You left Hollywood and tried to escape and it's coming to Austin. Is it really? They're doing a lot of like the film tax credit thing. I think that fast strip, which by the way is awesome. Have you been out to fast strip? Yeah, it's beautiful.

1:12:27Ryan Holiday has his podcast out there. He bought like a bookstore. It looks like Mayberry. It's like this strip of like a saloon and a bookstore. And like it's so cute. But fast strip did, I don't remember what the TV show was called. The shot that I had Elizabeth Olson and it's supposed to be really good. But there's a couple other towns that are building studios out here. I know. Sorry. Coming to get you. They'll come. Yeah, they'll ruin it. But I don't think the lever turned into Hollywood. No, no, no, no. What that thing was was a place that was created essentially when they realized that it never rains.

1:13:05They said, oh, we could film here all the time. And so they just started moving everything out there. And Johnny Carson moved out there. And all these different things happen. And they're doing all these movies. And then the people that wanted to be famous moved out there too. And even if they didn't make it in show business, they became dentists. They became doctors. They became those people populated the area. So there's like an ethic, like a way of thinking in that area, which prioritized fame above everything. And everyone that has other jobs there, they're just trying to get a reality show about their job.

1:13:39That's true too. So I had a shoulder injury and I got this massage person, you know, to come help like stretch it out, whatever. And third or fourth session he comes. He's like, hey, I'm shooting a sizzle reel for what it's like to be a celebrity masseuse. Will you be on it? And like, what, can you just, I had a personal trainer who got to show it Netflix about being a trainer. I'm like, can anyone just do what they do without the end goal actually trying to be famous? Well, how about I'm a celebrity masseuse? Can I get a sizzle reel? What the fuck are you talking about? I'm not a break into you.

1:14:10You get famous for giving backrobs like what are you talking about? Truly. A celebrity masseuse. I know. It's just everybody's trying to get famous and whatever vocation they're doing is just to try to get famous at that. I want to be a famous interior designer. I want to be a famous dentist. I want to be a Hollywood designer. But also if you want to be more successful and get more clients, that is the way to do it. I mean, if you're utilizing social media, like if you're a trainer and you look awesome, you're going to get a lot of clients on social media just from that. It's actually a good marketing move, but it also has that gravity of possible YouTube slash TikTok slash whatever fame.

1:14:47And then you say, okay, I can make a living off of this. Yeah, there's just a, you know, I don't know. I think for me, it's like what we do is like, you know, I was talking to one of your guys up front. And you know, being a comedian, it's weird because it's like there's a point where you go like, now that I'm having a kid and I'm kind of like, oh, you can't undo fame. Like you can't undo that. And I remember you can fade away. You can fade away. You can become a relevant for sure. Yeah. But especially this day, and you have to fight so hard to probably stay famous. But it's kind of like, it's one of those things I remember Bill Murray said one time.

1:15:23Someone asked him like, do you hate being famous or something? And he goes, what I would say to people that want to be famous is try getting rich and see if you still need to get famous. Which I kind of liked because sometimes you're like, no, I just want to be able to pay my bills. But as a comic, I remember thinking like, no, you have to get famous for people to buy tickets. There's no way otherwise. I got to get a sitcom so people know me. And then they're going to come see me do stand up. I was just talking to Bert and he was a rannado group of comedians that aren't doing so well. And aren't selling tickets on the road.

1:15:52They were asking to go with him and this and that. And he's like, oh, Jesus. It's not easy for everybody. There's some people that for whatever reason they never marketed themselves very well. They never got the attention they felt like they should have deserved. And now they're in their fifties and they can't sell out a club and they're fucked. And they can't make a living. So they're not paying their rent. It's like, it's not good. Yeah, I mean, it's a tricky one. And like, not to plug the special coming out. I know you and Matt Reif talked about OFTV. It's only fans the TV section. I'm doing their first special.

1:16:29But they're doing, remember like live at Gotham. Remember there was like evening at the improv. There used to be specials for comics that couldn't get the Netflix special. They don't necessarily do the hour. If you were maybe like a quote middle class comedian, you could at least get screen time or get a good tape. You could go on fan or whatever. You could headline at a road club. That like doesn't exist anymore. Right.

1:16:55And it's like, it's like a square space at this point. It's just like a plug -in. I don't even know how to get it. Yeah. Isn't it quickly how that dropped off from relevancy? Wow. It used to be the most important thing to get on. And that was just 10 years ago. 2013. That was 10 years ago. It was very important to get on Comedy Central. Like, oh my god, they had South Park. They had this. They had that. It was a lot of fun.

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1:26:47It was a lot of fun.

1:26:53It was a lot of fun. It was a lot of fun. It was a lot of fun. It was a lot of fun. It was a lot of fun. It was a lot of fun. It was a lot of fun. It was a lot of fun. It was a lot of fun. It was a lot of fun. It was a lot of fun. It was a lot of fun. It was a lot of fun. It was a lot of fun. It was a lot of fun. It was a lot of fun. It was a lot of fun.

1:27:26It was a lot of fun. It was a lot of fun. It was a lot of fun. It was a lot of fun. It was a lot of fun. It was a lot of fun. It was a lot of fun. It was a lot of fun. It was a lot of fun. It was a lot of fun. It was a lot of fun. It was a lot of fun. It was a lot of fun. It was a lot of fun. It was a lot of fun. It was a lot of fun. It was a lot of fun. It was a lot of fun.

1:27:53It was a lot of fun. It was a lot of fun. It was a lot of fun. It was a lot of fun. It was a lot of fun. It was a lot of fun. It was a lot of fun. It was a lot of fun. It was a lot of fun. It was a lot of fun. It was a lot of fun. It was a lot of fun. I don't know if I wouldn't be doing yoga and with wraps. I don't know if I wouldn't be doing yoga and with wraps. The thing is, if you get in that, there's two arguments. If you get in that ecosystem. If you get in that ecosystem. If you get in that ecosystem. If you get in that ecosystem. If you get in that ecosystem. If you get in that ecosystem.

1:28:32If you get in that ecosystem. If you get in that ecosystem. If you get in that ecosystem. If you get in that ecosystem. If you get in that ecosystem. If you get in that ecosystem. If you get in that ecosystem.

1:28:49If you get in that ecosystem. You represent this company. You represent this company. You represent this company. You represent this company. You represent this company. You represent this company. You represent this company. You represent this company. You represent this company. You represent this company. You represent this company. You represent this company. You represent this company. You represent this company. You represent this company. You represent this company. You represent this company. You represent this company. You represent this company. You represent this company. You represent this company.

1:29:17You represent this company.

1:29:24Touch the股. Touch the股. Touch the股 to you, you can. You could just pop up a window and see a thousand squares who can talk to the black oops. It's a place where you have, not many people we've just seen, a place where you have, not many people we've come to. Which still looks like a mark on those woman here are the people just sitting on the window. jokes on there that you'll get canceled for saying on Twitter or do it all. It's kind of like Patreon or whatever. Right. Because there's a lot of people that are like influencers and chefs and stuff like that. On only fans now making money on the way you would on Patreon.

1:30:01But it's interesting because remember like porn you used to develop a relationship with one porn star. Like there's a lot of guys that kind of are monog - want to be monogamous with their person and that's part of the reason these women are making so much money. They get tips. Oh yeah. They have like Angela White. She came on my podcast. Her biggest money maker is DMing with men and sending them customized videos men want to be shrunk and for her to put them in her pocket. And she just sends a video of her putting the man in her pocket. Oh. Remember that lit video with Pam Anderson when we were younger?

1:30:37Is that some weird fantasy back to that? Maybe. Maybe. I think sometimes she eats them. For a little more I think she'll eat them. But it's like a lot of it seems like it's not just because you can find buttholes and crazy sex anywhere on Pornhub. It's just some weird fetish. Like that. It's like that exactly. And she shrinks them down. She goes in a Photoshop. She's very savvy with the Photoshop. Shrinks them and then puts them in her pocket. And that's it. Okay. So it's pretty wild. I don't know. I mean it seems like there's like a I think there's some men on there that kind of don't want to just see some stranger because also you go on Pornhub and all these places.

1:31:15You're like I don't know how old this person is. I don't know. It's a lot of step brother and steps. I don't know what I'm looking at. You know I'd rather kind of see a woman breastfeeding so I know that she's you know. Yeah. Well there's got to be weird kinks outside of just like regular sex stuff. Like how many guys like to get their balls stopped on? What is that? What is that? I don't know. That can't be good. I think some of it is CEOs. I think there's being denigrated being humiliated. I think there's some of these guys out of the head of these giant corporations and they're under so much crazy stress and they take some sort of jolly and getting kicked in the nuts to what to do.

1:31:54Like dominatrixes they'll tell you they deal with these like high stress guys that run businesses. I have a friend that did that for a while. She sold or she would send guys this one guy photos of her feet but she would demand like money from him that's what he was into like send me a hundred dollars right now kind of thing and then she would insult him. She would just go to his house and insult him while he would jerk off. They call them humiliatrixes. Yes. Yeah. They go okay. Cool. I mean I'm encouraged by how popular milk porn is. That's very promising. It's very promising. Well, milk can keep it together these days.

1:32:33They used to be they didn't lift weights. They didn't take care of their nutrition. They didn't lift weights. So they hit a certain point in time and you know. And then there was the milves that were like they had that much sand left in the hour glass and so they were really horny. Like they knew they only had like that much more time where men found them desirable. Interesting. Yeah. I didn't know if it was that because I remember when I made that robot for one of my specials. I went down to the robot making factory and they told me the most popular request for the sex doll nipples were large and brown.

1:33:06Like the nipple being like almost as big as the boob and dark which is what happens when you breastfeed your nipples get dark. So I thought it was some primordial. Oh, could be about like dark nipples or something. Right. It could be. It's like a maternal thing. Or your or people are just guys are watching mil porn to be like is that what my wife supposed to look like. I mean, she's comparing. I don't know. Yeah. But it's always heartening when you go to porn site and milves is number one. I'm like, yeah, what's generally the milk fucks the stepson? That's a lot of it. It's like, what is that?

1:33:39Well, the dad is an asshole. He was a shitty dad. He was never home. He was mean. And then he gets rid of the mom and gets this new hot monster that lives in his house. That's just a cock addict. And then we run out of taboo's guys. Are we running out of to when did sex get so boring guys? Well, that's the most likely one because you couldn't do it the other way. I guess you could, but it'd be way creepier. Yeah, yeah. You know, it was a stepdad and the daughter. Yeah, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, thanks. I'm good on that. But, right? Isn't it funny? I know I do that, but isn't it funny that the stepdad and the daughter creeps me out?

1:34:14But the stepson's like, ha, for some reason, for some reason, what is that? It's like if you were to do like professor student, you'd be like, oh, but if it's like teacher and you're like and guy, you're like, oh, good for him. Yeah. I know. It's a tough one. Yeah, but it's just we don't worry about boys the way we worry about girls. That's what it is. I've been trying to write a bit about this for so long and I think there's a lot of reasons I can't crack it, but it is really like when boys get molested, nobody cares. No, well, they do think it molested by men. Then it's murderous. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

1:34:51And if like an actress in LA gets hugged too long in a Christmas party, like we shut down. Variety rates from page on the floor. Search the highways are shut down like everyone gets fired. It's interesting. And then there's also that some women, particularly in Hollywood, they use seduction to ingratiate them with people. They will flirt with people to get closer to producers. And that's one of the reasons why, you know, who is the famous one that Tarantino told us about that had a bed in his office where he would bed starlets. And this was like, you know, back in the day in the early movie business.

1:35:31It was. It was. It's not like he definitely. But I'm sure it was a common practice. Yeah, I think all those studio heads and all those executives, like Harvey Weinstein was just one of many of that's how they did it. Like you got jobs if you blew guys. And there was a lot of girls that were willing to do that. And the real actresses were frown upon it and they'd be mad. But a lot of times they'd be boxed out. And we heard those stories. Yeah. Um, I told you about that time, Harvey Weinstein came to the comedy store. No, you didn't. He came to the comedy store who came in the main room and I left and the manager at the time called me and he's like, Harvey Weinstein came to see you.

1:36:11You need to come back here right now. And the only reason I didn't go back is because I was like, no, he saw me in like good lighting. Like, I don't want to come back. But that's hilarious. Really good. I missed my window. Yeah, you got lucky. Yeah. You dodged that one. I mean, it is wild though. Like how, I mean, when I first moved to LA, people go, yeah, you got to sleep hard. Like it was just like people just said it. Like it was like, Ellen's mean. Like everyone just said it. It's like, Ellen's mean and Harvey Weinstein, you have to, he has to rape you for your job. And you're like, cool. Let me know.

1:36:44But he made deals with people, right? Like where he really did follow up on his deal. You want an Oscar? Yeah. You know, because Oscars are all bought. You know, it's a lot of money to win an Oscar. Is it really bought? How much of its bought? I mean, Jamie, help. I mean, it's. I haven't bought one myself, but it's pretty expensive from what I understand. I mean, you do also have to campaign. You have to go to these nursing homes because the voters are in nursing homes. I don't know how it works now. I think they've kind of, you know, I mean, George Lopez is on the board now. So I don't know exactly.

1:37:17Is it really? Well, yeah, they really wanted to make a big, you know, diversity push for the board of the Oscars. Like South Park? Making a girl a maker gay. So funny. But it is. It's a big campaign. You have to put to buy all the sads. You have to, you know, yeah. It's funny how that's still a big deal. Awards for art. Mm -hmm. I was thinking about this of the new special I did. I'm probably not getting much trouble. They only fans TV did let me yell about trans people for 30 minutes. But now that Ellen Page is a trans man, can she win an Oscar if she was emotional in a role? Or is that cheating?

1:38:02Huh. Well, she's still a tiny man, you know, so it's going to be difficult for her to. But if she can cry. If she, he, if he can cry again. And Q. Is it cheating? Is it, she is it like. Depends on what hormones. Yeah. Yeah. If he's jacked up on testosterone. Okay. So should we have to do that kind of testing the same way you would test an athlete who is about to compete against biological females? You know, it's also interesting. If you become a trans man, you're allowed to be like as manly as possible and if you become a trans woman, you're allowed to go full -who. You have to look like many months.

1:38:42Yeah, they celebrate these embracing of gender norms, of gender ideals. They celebrate it when you're trans. Yeah, I make fun of all my, like the trans girlfriends I have. I'm like, you know that women wear pants, right? Like, you know, women, we don't have to dress like Betty Booth. Like why are you wearing cat ears? They're trying so hard. But I think it's also, it's like if you're trying to make up for lost time, it's like, okay. Maybe you wanted, maybe you wanted to be a girl when we're like eight, so you're dressing with the way you, you know, like in a princess costume. Right, for 25 years you held it back.

1:39:15Yeah, but I think it's like if you're gonna transition to a woman in 2023, you need to look like one of the boys from stranger things. Like this is how we trust. Right. We just like bull dicks now. But they can't because it's gotta be clear what you're doing. Yeah, yeah. You can't have no makeup on in short hair. Like what? Mm -hmm. Yeah. I have to really like indicate it a little more. The Elliott Page one when he got fake abs, this is the wildest one. Is that like a surgery for fake abs? Yeah, they do for surgery for fake abs now. They give you av implants. I bet you could get neutacles too.

1:39:47You know how like, you know when some people will neuter their dogs. Oh, they give them fake balls. But I give them fake balls, you probably get those too. I guess you could. Have you seen the pictures of the fake abs? You gotta see this. Because it's so crazy. Because it would be like someone who only did sit up with like a weighted vest on and dumbbells and like reverse squats. You would have to do like hardcore ab exercises to develop a core like this. And it also no trans men transition to like a dad bod. I guess. Same. Chasbono. That's a good point. Yeah. That's a good point. But so if you get fake out, is it like calf implants?

1:40:32Yeah. And what happens if you actually start working out? Their heart is a rock. I'm not hard to rock, but it's like there's an implant, like a titty implant. Okay. That's under there that accentuates the area where you would have extraordinary abdominal muscles. Okay. Show the picture. Ellie page. And it's just like a. What 100 % it's not real. Okay. Because here's the thing. When you look at the rest, that one's one, but the one out in the light that you showed the first photo. Uh huh. Like those are giant abs muscles. Wow. Like to have ab muscles like that, you would have shoulder muscles, you'd have arm muscles, but he doesn't have either.

1:41:10He's got armpit hair. Is that a merkin or can you grow those? You can grow those. Oh, wow. Yeah. But like those abs are crazy. That's why you would you would have to be like doing some serious fucking sit -ups to develop abs like that. That's super intense. Because even if you're just flexing, like holding your for the camera with good lighting, like those are extraordinary. Yeah, to have them like cut in like that. Yeah, but the rest of your body doesn't have any muscle development. I think that's a before picture. Yeah. That makes sense. That's skinny. And then on the right one, look at that.

1:41:46Those are giant. How is there already a surgeon that does this? You know, they've been doing it for a while. Have they? Yeah, ab implants. You can see some hard nightmare story ab implants, but they look super fake. Mmm. Oh, look at that. Oh, god. So they slice you open. I've heard these fucking things in there. And then all of a sudden it looks like you got massive abs. I have a friend who used to work with David Copperfield and said after they worked together one night, they were in like some hotel. And he went out on his balcony and saw David Copperfield's full body muscle suit hanging like over the railing to like dry out.

1:42:23Like he wore a full suit underneath. Oh, to make it look like you had a great body. Oh my god, that's insane. Like a superhero costume. Like a wax, like costume basically with like abs and pecs. No way. And they put his shirt on over that. And it was hanging over the railing. It just looked like. Whoa. I know. Wild. That's a two pay times 100. Yeah, that guy's wild. That's crazy. I didn't even know they had those other than like for movies. I'm sure you got like custom made because he's David Copperfield. Just go to the gym. You lazy fuck. Oh, how many days a week you working on magic? Doesn't he have his own island?

1:43:04I think he's got like an island. I'm not sure. How did it into people that have islands right now? Well, he's been headlining in Vegas for so long. Is that real? Yeah, silicone. What? Oh, that's an outfit. So if you look at the sleeves, see how it sits over. Yeah, exactly. Okay. Yeah, he has like one of these. That's so great. I don't know. Those are great tits, by the way. That's so cool. That is nuts. No oil nonstick. No oil and nonstick. Oh, but imagine you're on date with a girl and she sees that. She's like, I got dick. No, no, no. No, no. We're allowed to have push up bras and no boobs underneath.

1:43:39That's my kind of guy. And then he's like, well, you know, I'm like, I really sick and I get up and I get a week ago, you were jacked. What happened? Where the fuck are your muscles? I waxed. What is that? I don't know. So, silicone pants for transgender realistic cross dresser underwear. Oh, it's realistic. Okay. That's realistic. Okay. It's like, realistic is good. Is that like Luigi transition pubes? Like what are those black curly pubes? That's a cheap one made in China. Made in Fichina. Buh. I like your, I like this new bit you're working on. I was thinking about it about, I don't want to tell people what it is, but about China.

1:44:17I mean, they just took the pandas back. Yeah, fuck you and you can't have our pandas. That means they're going to nuke us. If they're like, get out the pandas. Why would they take three pandas back now? Because we're assholes. But what was the motivating, what was the impetus? Oh, I don't know. Under Biden has to live with the fact that under his presidency, we lost three pandas. Yeah. Forget billions of dollars. The whole thing is spooky. Because they look, if I was another country, I'd be looking at America right now and go, if you're going to do something. Now's the time. Now's the time. When that green, John Pierre, whatever her name is, got busted tweeting as Biden.

1:45:00That White House press secretary lady is the worst White House press secretary lady ever. I mean, just, it's just weekend at Bernies at this point. But she got caught tweeting as Biden on her couch. You forgot to switch accounts. No. Oh. Yes. Oh, Jesus. You didn't see that? No. Jamie. Have we solved whose cocaine is in there? Hunter Biden's. It's hunters for sure. Yeah. The dude likes to party. Oh my God. That's the only reason why nobody knows who's fucking cocaine it is. How do you, that place has so many cameras. You're telling me they can't figure out who dropped the baggy. It's so true. And if he was there, he would give some to his dad so his dad can get the baggy.

1:45:43Get the wrist speech. Marked for deleted tweets saying she ran for president. So this is the tweet. So her tweet was, investing in America means investing in all America. When I ran for president, I made a promise that I would leave no part of the country behind. Like, no. So she's treating us as the president. But now we know who writes that stuff. No. Yes. She mistakenly logged into her Twitter account instead of president Biden's supposed to tweet. A layer. All the people that are doing cocaine shouldn't be and all the people that aren't should be. It seems like she could actually use some.

1:46:19Oh, she's probably just, I can't believe the job she signed up for. Like, you think you're going to get the White House press secretary and then every day Biden is saying something dumber. There it is. Oh my God. Every day Biden is saying something dumber and then the press is grilling you on it and you have to explain it away. I just don't understand why they can't put a little bronzer on this guy. I mean. There's nothing you could do. No. He's at the end. I mean, he's basically Joey D .S. at the best. He was already got the formaldehyde in them.

1:46:51I have to be. Can we take a break? Oh please. We'll be right back. A pregnant lady would love to. Biden being old. What? I mean, what does our president look like a condominium in Portland? I just don't, I can't imagine that they think he's going to run in a year for president. It's a year from now and November next year. And then he's going to run for four more years. It's going to be the president for four more years like how? Did you see the clipper? He said, oh God, it was so racist back then. He was like, you know, something about the difference between poor kids and white kids. Yeah, poor kids.

1:47:29And white kids. Just as smart as white kids. Why did we not start the impeachment process right then and there? Did you see where he said recently that he taught at University of Pennsylvania for four years? Oh my God. Never taught a single class. Oh my God. It is just the guy. He looks like the nutcracker. Like the other countries are just like laughing at us, dude. They must be so fun. They must be so fun for them to watch us implode. And if you literally, if you are Russian, I'm sure you've seen that Yuri Besmanoff video where you, okay, you should see this. We shouldn't play it because we played it on this podcast 20 times, but I'll show it to you afterwards.

1:48:06It's a former guy from the KGB who's explaining what they've done to America and how they've infiltrated their education systems and the demoralization of America and that this is a plan and it takes two generations. And he's talking about it's a 20 year plan and he's talking about this in the 1980s. Wow. And that's already been implemented. It is too far gone. You will not stop this process. This process is the moralization of your country. We'll be complete. And it starts with teaching Marxist -Leninist ideas and colleges. Wow. Yeah, it's wild. It's wild because if this guy was just guessing in 1984 and it's not really like a long -term Soviet strategy to destroy America, that has been like super -duper successful.

1:48:57I mean, feels like there's, I don't know, RFK Jr. But I'm not weighing in on the science part of it. I just feel like if we had someone being like, well, I'm coming for you. I mean, his voice alone is like, I think everyone would be like, damn, they're not fucking around in America. Well, I think there are other countries biggest fear would be Trump getting back and power. Yeah. Because he's the one guy that is even though he's a business insider, he's a billionaire and all that good stuff, but he's not a political insider and he does not work well with those people and he wants to do things his way.

1:49:34And I just think he's a much more formidable adversary for these countries. He doesn't, doesn't fuck around with them. But he also will make deals with them too. Like, it's kind of crazy. I was, no one gave him credit for saying the literally the most logical thing when he was talking to CNN's, Caitlin, whatever, and I forget the woman's name, I'm sorry. But he was talking to her and she said, do you want Ukraine to win this war? I want people to stop dying. No one else would say that. Well, that seems like the most logical thing to say. Let's stop, figure out how to get people to stop dying. Of course, it's a horrible war.

1:50:13You got people that were literally a part of the same union and now they're blowing each other up. I think we're getting to a point where people just want to see someone be fearless. It's like the same person who's like Rosie O'Donnell's fat. Yeah, is she not? Is she not? Like, I mean, it's funny, but it's also like it just boils down to, yeah, this guy will say the truth. What happened with Rosie talk shit about him or something like that? Is that what's totally new? I don't really know. Well, I think, look, we forget that he was the biggest TV star before he was the president. I mean, the apprentice was massive.

1:50:41So I think he maybe knew her from that and he called her fat. I mean, remember, but people just and boils down to like, yeah, she is. He's fat too. Exactly. Rosie, are you not? I don't know, tell you. He's just saying the truth. And I think that it's like people are trying so hard just to get reelected instead of just tell the truth and serve their country. And it's so obvious and transparent. And it's like the more, it's like when that woman, Eugene Carroll, came forward against him for like sexual harassment and he was like, look at her. Are you think on her ass or I mean, just like the guy's unstoppable.

1:51:10That lady's a nutty lady. You ever seen that lady get interviewed? Yeah, they keep trying to keep her away from the cameras. Oh boy. She's like an advice columnist or something. I don't even know. She's a journalist, but she's eccentric. We're at the point where like, yeah, we're at war, you guys. We need someone who's just going to like say the truth. Well, also like what are our options? You know, what are the options? Yeah. The whole thing is just so scrambled. It's a scary time. It's weird because it's just, it shows you the thing that you've already known, but you didn't want to admit that this system is not run logically and it's not run by someone who's like some evolved experience person who's, you know, got a real grip on how to run this system.

1:51:54Like there's no one like that. They don't exist. So you just have these special interest groups that are forcing things to get done that shouldn't get done and money to get in jokers. You see that Zelensky the other day just asked for a credit. He's like, if you want to give us any more money, please give us credits. Like credits. Credit so they can buy more weapons and shit. If you aren't going to give us money, give us credit. We'll pay you back. It just seems kind of wild that we're sending all this money all over the world. Not that they don't need help, but it's like, what about people in America?

1:52:23What about Hawaii? What about Hawaii? We just forgot about Hawaii or? Yeah. They accidentally spent an extra $6 billion on Ukraine. They sent an accidental $6 billion, which would be more than enough to replace every single home that burned in Maui. And there was no consideration for doing that at all. And we don't have clean water and Appalachia or Flint. Do we have we've sold that yet? Okay. All right. And then everywhere else it has water as fluoride in it. Explain that. Which that was it wasn't in the surgeon general do that in the 50s. Like wasn't that something that was done by the surgeon general?

1:53:00Oh, check his fucking stock market portfolio. And was the idea of that to help with dental stuff? Gary Brecker was talking about on the podcast. I love that guy. Yeah, he's great. He said there's some evidence that it's a thin layer of protection that it can give you, but also brush your fucking teeth. And also wouldn't Flint water criminal prosecutions end with no charges, frustrated residents. Wow. No charges. This is just updated recently. It's just like this just happened. Well, it could have just been negligence and you know lack of I don't know what I have no knowledge about the Flint thing other than when Obama pretended to drink water from there.

1:53:39Can I get a glass of water? I'm serious. I'm thirsty. Can I get a glass of water? This is not a prank. It just takes like goes like this. You never seen it? Oh my God, it's amazing. It's amazing. It's amazing. He gets a glass of Flint tap water and I swear to God, he drinks it like this like this. Is he trying to act like it's the problem that solved? Bullshitting the world. Like to think that you could bullshit the world over whether or not you drink water. Have a sip of water. Also have that sip just for the. Come on, these people are drinking it. Get a little. Watch this. I need a glass of water.

1:54:19This is not a stunt. Look at this. Stop. Stop. I'm going to talk about this. Everybody settle that. Go out for the beginning. Get it. Get it. Get it. Do it from the beginning. It's two minutes. He's asking for someone to bring him a bottle and I'll sort this out. Yeah, I was. Can I get some water? I'm going to get some water.

1:54:47Just waiting for the water. Trying to say it's time. They're straining the water. But why would they be cheering when they're literally. I want the glass of water. He's literally drinking poison water. Like they're drinking poison water and everyone's cheering that he's asking for poison water. Because they're excited he's about to fall over and die. No, they didn't. You know, he's showing. I don't know how he's going to fix it. I mean. Well, I'm still waiting for my water. Oh, meanwhile, you know that's Fiji. They poured the water. Right now they're like they just ran to the grocery store in this amount of time.

1:55:20Now the reason I know I'm okay is because I already had some liquid water. What? Here we go. Like he's doing a shot of Red Bull. This is spooky. I really didn't need a glass of water. Usually when something isn't a stunt, you have to say that. It's 100 % a stunt. One last time a president stopped a speech to ask, can I get a glass of water? What? They would never do that. They would have water ready for him. If you do stand up. How often have you said, can I get a glass of water? No, you bring a fucking water on stage with you. And then what happened? It still hasn't been handled. This is not drink.

1:55:59Gross. I mean, did it even get in his mouth? I mean, it's Appalachia water. Still from Purdue poisoning the water. Like a lot of people that I went to high school with and stuff. They thyroid cancer 40. Really? Yeah, from the dew point. I mean so many chemicals have been thrown into Appalachia. But West Virginia water, dew pot, put in all that. Remember there is that dark water? There's a movie with Mark Ruffalo. Great. He did it again. There's another one. Watch what he did at this time. Watch what you get to him this month. Generally I have not been doing stunts here, but you know. Oh, really?

1:56:35And this used a filter. You know, the water around this table was plant water that was filtered. But it didn't drink it. He did instantly start stuttering after he had a tiny bit of it. So I start blinking. Instant neurological damage. So what was the Purdue thing? Was it something? I'm sorry, dew pot. It was a teflon. So the movie Dark Water covered it. But it was actually RFK worked on this case back when he was a lawyer. Because you know, RFK spent so much time trying to clean up water, which I really admired. But what teflon was made of. They ended up just pouring into the. Dark waters. I never watched this.

1:57:20It's amazing. Mark Ruffalo. Tim Robbins. Tim Robbins. And it's all about. And it's all about the poisoning of the water in Appalachia. He's a lawyer. And the lawyer who took on the case for free to try to take on dew pot. I mean, it looks like John Reeves. Doesn't he? You got a shorter version of John Reeves? Okay. Disgusting. I mean, it's really good. Well, they've been doing that from the beginning of time. Yep. And then when they're out doing it here, they do it in South America. And what they're doing, I mean, in Appalachia with the coal mines and all the pollution from that is really incorrigible.

1:57:56Yeah, it's all crazy. It's pretty well. Well, we were looking at this video of this one town in Indiana where they have multiple coal mines in the area. And you go outside, these people have like a thin layer of soot that's on their windshield. And you can wipe it off with your finger. And so like you're breathing that. It's going into kids' lungs, yeah. Everybody, host of different sort of cardiovascular diseases. Long diseases these people have. Fuck. I mean, it's so heartbreaking. And I mean, I guess I don't know enough about the topic, but you know, there's this great documentary called Hillbilly about the moment Hillary really put her foot in her mouth, call it for clean energy.

1:58:35And she said it was not the deplorable speech, but it's she said we're going to get rid of coal mining. You guys did the best you could to keep the lights on. What? And by best, they could that they died. Like I've grandfather worked in coal. And what massacled and sinclercled what they did to that region is so despicable because number one, they wouldn't allow for you know unionizing. And it's a great place to union bust because people live so far apart. They would isolate, you know, the Italians from the Irish from the Black so that nobody would collude and unionize. But they would pay the coal miners in vouchers to the sincler oil store so that they could never build any kind of wealth.

1:59:15They built the schools. I mean, they own everything. You know, and and it's a great documentary about about how Trump put on a hard hat. He went to West Virginia and said, I'm never going to get rid of coal because I'm not going to get rid of your jobs. And even though there's only you know 50 ,000 left, it's like, you know, one of the most valuable in terms of like voting areas at the country that people just ignore. People just never go there. It's heartbreaking. But that's also said with opioid crisis. So it's coal. It's teflon. It's poisoning water and then opioid crisis. Yeah, there's spots in this country where you get a bad role to die.

1:59:49It's to be born in the fucking hillbilly commune in West Virginia and like fuck. That's right. That's right. And there's a lot of like, you know, in the fact that it's thought of as this backwards area always breaks my heart because it was the first like woke state. It was the first state that said we're not doing slavery. Said we're not doing slavery. John Brown left and said we're not playing this shit. And so they were they just assumed a victim of the fact that they had coal. Yeah, came in being exploited, which is, you know, I mean, I don't know if this is exactly true or not, but people I know that are in the coal business there is like, you know, they've taken all of our natural resources.

2:00:22If they hadn't mind all of our coal, like by now we would have diamonds, you know, like they've taken all the wealth of the region. And it's just it's totally devastating what it's done to the topography. I mean, the trailers, the the boulders, crush kids all the time because of the way that they've messed with the topography. And completely just depleted the soil. Also, they'll have collapses and shit. Yes. Bloods, horrible floods. Dude, imagine being in one of those things when it collapses. Can't. Can't. Can't. Probably being that little Titanic easy, big oven. There's one place that has coal mines that has a fire that's been burning inside that coal mine for like decades.

2:01:02Wow. That makes sense. I mean, the fact that that this I think about this all the time because I don't know if where you are on like a incestional trauma and epigenetic imprinting and stuff. But I've always had a little bit of a like I don't like small spaces, you know, and my grandfather was in mines and sometimes that imprints on you. Look at this. Original cause and start days still a matter of debate. It is burning a depths up to 300 feet over an eight mile stretch of 3 ,700 acres at its current rate. It could continue to burn for over 250 years. Dude, the fire in the 1980s, Centralia was mostly abandoned.

2:01:38Can you imagine going a mile into the earth? See if you can find a video of that because there's videos of it. It's very strange. So this coal mine fire has been going on forever. Wow. And it burns underneath the ground and it's all coal. So it's never going out and there's oxygen to it. So it's never going out. Since 1971. Wow. Fucking crazy. Dude. I mean, they would burn. It says it's been burning since 62. Oh my god. Oh my god. That's what's not available. It's just coming out of the ground everywhere. Imagine you're driving through and there's no one there. No. That's some walking dead shit.

2:02:20It's not too scary. And also how bad is that air suck? That's the thing about the coal mining thing. It's like what you really need to do is find under other industries. Yeah, without taking coal miners jobs. Because it's like, it's this thing where they have this skill. And then all of a sudden it's like, we're going to get rid of your... Well, remember learn to code. That was the thing. They were telling them learn to code. Oh god. Like what? Learn to code the robots that are going to replace you. You learn to get something that's going to give you a job is what the idea was. But it's like, fuck, what are you saying?

2:02:53It must be wild. Like you're going to send kids to college soon. Like is that a weird... I mean college. You know, I had this conversation with someone the other day where they were like, you know, kids today have it harder. I'm like bro, kids were born before they were floors. No, no, no. You know, there was no then invented floors yet and people were having kids. Yeah. It's complicated for sure. It has always been complicated. Every single time human beings have been alive, it's been complicated. These are different complications that our kids are dealing with and we dealt with. And every generation has probably said that, right?

2:03:28Yes. This is the hardest generation for kids. Or the weirdest. Like the 80s are probably weird compared to the 70s. Some kids used to work in factories. Oh yeah. That's the other part of that dissolving illusions. Some still do. Burning mountain is a rare phenomenon. A coal seam buried 30 meters underground, which has been burning for at least 5 ,500 years. And some say over 15 ,000 years. Where is that? It's in Australia. Fuck. So is that how we found fire? Did we just stumble across it? I think it was lightning. Did we really come up with it? I think it was lightning. I think that's what the current belief is that originally they carried fire from one place to another.

2:04:11You know, they would get the coal and they would figure out how to maintain it because it was so precious when it happened. And they figured out how to keep fires lit. If you have a fire pit somewhere like a water pit, they used to go in and get water from Jesus. So walk and get more fire when you're out of fire. You don't need to worry about making it because they have it. Were there brush fires back then? The way they're out here. Yeah, for sure. I'm thinking of it as a super baseline. Like we don't know what fire is, but it's over there so we can just go get more of it. Well, I think for sure when they first found fire they said, you know what's kind of nice.

2:04:41You get close to this. It's kind of hot over here. And then they probably figured out, well, you just put more wood on it. You can make it more fire. And then you can pick up the parts that's not on fire and take it over here. Throw your enemy on it. Yeah, how do you make one of those things? Yeah. And then someone figured out, you know what friction makes fires. And then the first dude that figured out how to do this. That was Hado CDs. Have you done that? Have you done that? Made a fire like in Girl Scouts or something? Yeah, I did in the Boy Scouts. It takes forever. And I don't think I ever really got a fire.

2:05:14I think I got to where it was blackened, you know, from the friction. There's like got a little bit red, but I never really made a fire. I wonder if they teach now in Girl and Boy Scouts, like just using the mirror and the sun. Doesn't that? I once had a my couch. There was like a CD or remember the old school CDs that like and it made the sun hit it and it burnt my couch. Do you know that that's the way that some people sabotage fields and start wildfires? They set up magnifying glasses at an angle and then they just leave the space. Like their competitors or something? Well, I don't know why and who, but I know that they have found magnifying glasses set up outside where people have like decided that the sun's going to hit here.

2:05:54It's going to burn this and they could just set it there at night and leave. That's pretty crazy. Yeah, and it works. That really works. It works. Like I did a lot of that as a kid. We lit paper on fire and shit with magnifying glasses. It's kind of nuts. I mean, it's like his kids are always doing dumb shit. Now they're just filming it, huh? Always. But that's the, that's a pretty wild one that you could take a magnifying glass. It's crazy. And start a fire. You can feel an ants. Oh yeah. We were kids. We would try to kill bugs and shit. Yeah, how wild is that? We were monsters. I mean, when people say like kids now, they leave negative comments and did that.

2:06:27I'm like, we used to take shovels and knock over mailboxes. Yeah, people used to play baseball with frogs. Oh god. We used to toilet paper people's homes. Like we used to throw eggs at people's cars. Like we would destroy, like now you get like destroyed emotionally for maybe a couple of minutes because you feel left out or you got a negative cut. We used to destroy property. Kids used to take rocks and put them in the middle of snowballs and then throw them at cars. Yeah. That's brutal. Yeah, it was crazy. You'd always hear cars hit the brakes. You motherfuckers. I mean, why did we do that with me?

2:06:58We would take a shovel drive by a mailbox and just slide it. Because it's there. It's like hot. You ever go to like a small town and you see bullet holes in the stop signs? Yes. That's what that is. Fuck yeah. Bang. I mean, now it's just filmed. Yeah. I guess that's the new Darwinism is arguing to film yourself doing it. Why about those kids that film themselves riding over that former police chief in Vegas? I haven't seen this but I didn't see a couple people die doing a TikTok challenge, doing a back flip off of a boat. Something like over 400 people have died so far taking selfies. Oh, at least.

2:07:36At least that we know. I know people have fallen off mountains. Just back in the back. That shit always happens. Yeah. So what happens is because you're so focused on getting the photo. I mean, there's a video of I think it's an India a guy taking a video of himself next to a wild bear as the bear eats him. Oh, God. And he's not everyone else is filming it, but like he's just keeps filming as he gets eaten. Yeah, people are if nothing's happened to you, you don't think it's going to happen to you. You have this shots off your front alone. It's that means it's truly a drug. Yeah. Is this the guy is taking a selfie?

2:08:09Oh, God. I think it's yeah, it starts with him taking the video and just. Oh, God. And that bear is just like, well, you're meat. Yeah. You're made out of meat. I'm fucking hungry. Oh, God. I don't think he survives this, right? Yeah. Yeah, probably not. Proknot. Oh, God. That fucked up my algorithm for a while. But what is the one that the person died? What? The biggest thing about the two kids. Oh, yeah. These two kids were driving in a car and he was on a bike and they fucking plow into him and they're laughing about it. And they filmed it and live streamed it. They hit one car, hit and run and they hit this guy and killed him.

2:08:50And it was initially reported. A lot of people like tried to say that they're trying to downplay crime because it was initially reported that he just died from hitting run. But and they were like, they don't even want to say why I really died. No, they didn't know why I really took like two weeks before they figured out these kids killed him. Jesus Christ. Yeah, they just and no remorse. They're laughing in court. They're giving people a finger in court. Is this like a psychopathy? Yeah, it's psychopathy but it's also street cred. They're trying to pretend they're hard. And then you go, has this always happened when we just didn't see videos of it?

2:09:23Mm -hmm. You know, like we've always done savage shit. Well, for sure there's always been gang bangers and gang bang initiations and people have always done fucked up things. It's just always been a part of human culture but it's just seeing young kids run over an old guy on a bicycle. It's particularly fucking disturbing. And one of those do you think that having all these videos available desensitizes? 100%. Wow. Yeah, I think 100%. I think there's a bunch of factors that desensitize people. I think movies, violent movies. And this is not a judgment. Like I'm not saying we shouldn't have violent movies or we shouldn't have violent video games.

2:09:58But if you don't think it's affecting people, of course it is. You're being so much, you're so accustomed to seeing violence. Yep. And while horrific violence. I really try to not watch like too much news or read too much news because it spooks me how I can just scroll past a school shooting with just like that. Yep. And like, I remember a new town happened. I was at a job where we sent everyone home. Like we sent everyone home and that happened. You know, it was like I cried. Now everybody would be like, oh no. Another one. I'm worried about my brain that I could just scroll right past that. We should be.

2:10:33It's a factor. You know, there's something going on. There's something going on with us with this prolonged exposure to horrific things. So, Gerr and I have this text message chain where every day we send each other the worst things we find. It's almost like we're waiting for someone to cry, Uncle. We do it every day. Every day we send each other. And I always tell when he's taking a shit because I get something like two o 'clock in the morning. It's some fucking. Some horrible car accident, some horrible animal attacks, some horrible. Remember when like there used to be like one video every couple months that would be like the what?

2:11:09Remember two girls one car like that was like and that was fake. That was like ice cream or something. Like I remember when that happened. Everybody had seen it. Now that's just kind of now it's nothing. When you realize how extreme that seemed at the time. I know. And that was a big deal. Like there was a reaction. The two girls one cup reaction videos. Yeah. You're watching it. Watching it. Yeah. But now you see ten times worse than that on a daily. If you have my algorithm, you know my algorithm is a mess. I don't know how to clean it. Do you think it's like part of your brain like because like it's like what is it rubber necking?

2:11:46Is it kind of the same thing in the brain where you see it accidents? Like you're trying to study it. There's also like you can't believe you're really seeing it. Like the hit and run that I saw yesterday is like whoa. That's wild. You saw that dude. I saw it as far from here as the door to this this studio is. It was two car lengths away. Do you say that when fast and furious movies come out car accidents go up? Oh for sure. Yeah. Yeah the type of people that are pumped that are fast and furious movies out they shouldn't be allowed to drive. Yeah. But we. There's always like so much more drag racing when that happens.

2:12:19But I feel like yeah. Should you take overs? I do feel like that's probably are always happened. But also it's like you know people I mean in Rome people used to go to the call of seem to see people get torn apart. Mm hmm. You used to go to the town square and watch people get hanged for entertainment. I mean this is in us. And also there's something that we are aware that we're very very vulnerable. So if we can watch something happen to someone that exposes that vulnerability we want to see it. We want to see the explosion. We want to see you know someone drop a fucking grenade off a drone into some dudes that are in a pit.

2:12:51We want to see it. And I want to know like it's like your brains way of rehearsing in case it happens. Someone was talking to someone about dreams and nightmares and they were like nightmares as your body's way of like preparing for a scenario. Do you have more nightmares after watching these? Not really. No. So if we were the program they had to cut this out and that's part of 91 .92 because people were dying. Apparently I think a few kids died because they were drunk and then laying in traffic like he does in the scene right here. Oh god. I remember this. Oh god. He doesn't get hit obviously but they're just crazy.

2:13:25The kids were doing. Oh we definitely did that in Virginia. What else was there to do? I never heard of anyone doing this. Really? Not until the movie came out. You would never go sit in the road? What? That was like our main hobby. What are you talking about? You guys would go sit in the road. Yeah of course. Jesus Christ. You see that guy in Venezuela I think it was. Was it Venezuela or somewhere where he shot stop oil protesters? Some guy just got out of his way. He's an American. I have seen this. They were blocking the road. I don't know if it was a stop oil. It was some sort of a protestor.

2:13:56They were sitting on the ground. Yep. This guy gets out, pulls out a gun and just fucking shoots people. Is it a danger? No. Oh. Because I've seen the rangers like drag them out of the road. I'll send a T .J. These videos available online but this guy just pulls out a gun and starts whacking people. A 77 year old man from... Oh I got a Panama. I got it here. Is it Panama? We got it on the screen. Oh this guy. I wouldn't fuck with that guy. Yeah this is a video of it. He just... They stop the traffic and he walks up to them and he pulls a gun out and fucking whacks them. I do enjoy seeing someone who's holding up a convenience store or something and then a pedestrian just pulls their gun out and handles it.

2:14:45Yeah. Okay I just opened up my thing and another guy just stabs someone. Oh god. This guy walking this slow. Yep. He pulls out a gun. Yeah. I'm not sure I'll show this on the internet. Yeah. I can see him. Yeah. Oh he's waving it. Yeah. He moves the stuff out of the way but one guy gets in the way and he just fucking shoots him. Kelsa? Yeah. Oh boy. Right here. He starts moving. He's like I got... They're talking shit to him. He's got to get to the urologist. Watch the guy with the blue hat.

2:15:24Once you get to that age he's like I have five more years to live. I'd rather go to jail than sit in traffic.

2:15:36He's got his finger on the pistol too. He's doing all the trigger. Why is anyone starting shit with him?

2:15:46Oh he just shot. Well they all started to do it. I guess they shot right after it. Let's see.

2:15:55What did you think was going to happen? He shot two guys. But there's a video that you can see I'm actually shooting people. I don't either be repulsing that for... Yeah we don't need to see it. I don't need to. But these fucking idiots that just block the road as if that's somehow another going to fix everything or the ones that go to fucking art galleries and smash paintings. I do think that there's a little bit of an invincibility complex that comes in with knowing you're being filmed. They probably think there's a camera here. He's not going to shoot us. You know what I mean? There's probably got cancer.

2:16:28It's 77 years old. He doesn't give a fuck. That's Clint Eastwood in every one of his movies. Don't fuck with that guy. But I do think sometimes people think there's a camera rolling. No one's going to hurt me. That's not how everybody thinks. That is so the idea that I'm going to throw a soup at a painting. Yeah. I'm going to glue myself to the wall. To stop. I mean, I also try to go like, okay, when I was in college I had a lot of really dumb ideas. That's what you're supposed to do in college. You're supposed to have dumb ideas. You're supposed to like be wrong, you know? But like the idea that we're taking any of this seriously like is this wild?

2:17:01Well, it's just he's like dumb, virtue signaling kids. I think they're going to fix the world by gluing themselves to a wall. You fucking idiots. But isn't that... I look at them and I go, this is like a medication mental illness issue. It's a mental illness issue. Right. It's a virtue signaling thing that you can do that now and get exorbitant amounts of attention where you couldn't do that before. And then also the punishments are so minimal. It's not nothing that you have to worry about losing your livelihood and the rest of your life being a disaster because of it. Like I say this is someone who had blue hair.

2:17:34Don't let anyone with blue hair in the museum. But you know, that's not the problem. You can have blue hair and be cool. The problem is these fucking young kids and most of them come from wealthy families. That's the take. They probably had a Monet in their house. And they think... They think... They just think they're going to... But the fact that you're doing these priceless works of art from people who died centuries ago and your cause you think eclipses everything else. These people are there enjoying this art. They have nothing to do with the oil industry. They're just enjoying at a museum the ability to stand in front of something that Picasso made.

2:18:15Like this is wild. And is the idea that it's going to help with global warming? We're going to stop oil now. Yeah, stop oil now. See, they're fucking children. I have some aunts in Virginia and they're so funny about the global warming thing. They're like, it's freezing. We can't afford heat. We'd love for a d 'wormable little bit. I always called them for a little perspective. They're like, we take the bus. We would love for there to be less snow on the ground. I'm always super suspicious about something that becomes like a major movement that everybody has to be on board with. The bottom line about the earth, we are 100 % affecting it.

2:18:48It's measurable. Human beings are carbon dioxide output. In particular, pollutants, 100 % what we're doing to the ocean. We're affecting the world in a negative way. However, when it comes to the climate, when it comes to the temperature of the earth, it has never been stable, ever, ever. When you look at the earth over a course of 10 ,000, 15 ,000, whatever years, it goes up and it goes down. I was reading this whole thing about how in Idaho, I think it was July or August of the 1930s, had reached a temperature of 118 degrees, like the highest ever recorded temperature there. There was nothing going on there.

2:19:32There was no fucking wholesale machines running and fucking diesel trucks everywhere. There was none of that. It's just not stable. The whole time the earth has been here, it goes up and down. And what Randall Carlson always says, he goes, yeah, global warming, it's bad because you have to move away from the coast. He goes, but global cooling is what's really scary. That's what's really scary. Because if we had another legitimate ice age, the fucking most of North America was covered in a mile of ice up until 11 ,000 years ago. It always gets tricky too when the solution to the problem makes politicians richer too.

2:20:14And everybody richer, industry richer, and people have invested interest in pushing that narrative financially. I don't have it, I'm not the person to be able to corroborate. But Shellenberger, Michael Shellenberger was about these like wind mill farms that they were putting in the oceans that was killing all these whales and stuff. And you're like, why is the pro -environment solution killing so many animals? It definitely does. Yeah, it's a fucking mess. It's a mess. But it's also people want to be on the side of something. They want to be against this, against oil, against that. Instead of everybody working together, figuring out what do we need to do to ensure the future.

2:20:52And it's definitely not empowering these people that want to take away all your autonomy and all of your control. That's not how to do it. That's not how to do it. It seems like I love what you're philosophy on hunting. Because factory farming, what they do with the cows and stuff, they're saying is such a problem. Yeah, most factories farming is horrific. People should start hunting their own food. That's hard too. Most people don't have time. They don't have the interest, which I get too. The real way to do it is regenerative farming. You can get regenerative, like whether it's from white oak's pastures or polyface farms, there's a bunch of regenerative farms right here in Texas that are organic farms.

2:21:33You can find them. They sell locally. They're grass fed meat. These animals just roaming around in a pasture. It's all ethical. That's what you want. You don't, you don't nest. But then again, if you're going to have a city of like 20 million people and there's no one growing anything other than weed, you're going to have to get food to all those people. How does jack in the box get their burgers? Yeah. Really have to have factory farms. I can't remember what the country is that gives everybody two chickens, you know, like, when I was reading about something in Hawaii where they're trying to get rid of all the fruit trees and stuff.

2:22:07So people can't even just get their own free food. They can't even grow their own shit. Why would they do that? I don't know. I'm going to have a deep algorithm. The Disney Dick algorithm. But it's like there is. I follow a couple. I'm learning how to pickle. Are you really? Yeah, just to have like, grow things. Yeah, just be able to grow your own food and be able to. Once you have a baby, you're going to move to the mountains or something? I think so. I think I might. You know I'm looking at places in Texas. I really want to just be a full -on Dr. Quinn medicine woman. Yeah, that would be awesome.

2:22:34And you could have zebras out here. Oh, sick. I'm so, that was so real. That was so real. Oh, it's that. Like, what he's going to have a fucking zebra 100%. You're about, um, uh, who's the big drug dealer in South America? Pablo Escobar. His hippos. Are like overrunning. Yeah, they're everywhere. Fucking killing everybody. It's been 20 years. There's going to be a thousand ferrule hippos. I'm like, please. Put me in coach. I'll take those hippos. Move to Texas. Zebras. Hippos. Oh, shikins. Fucking dangerous. You start. Oh, they're so violent. They're fucking dangerous. They're awesome. That's crazy animal.

2:23:11They kill more people in Africa than any other animal. Is that true? I think, yeah. I think they kill a lot of people every year. I think it's hundreds of people every year and die from hippos. Just by charging, are they? They eat you. Yeah. They just smash you in half. Fucking wild. When you see them eat a watermelon, you're like, ah. Dude, that's your head. I love the Pablo Escobar. It's just like had that. I wonder if I wonder. Is that part of how he killed people? Just throw them to the hills. Probably. Yeah. I bet. Why not? I pity killed people every different way you could think of. I mean, when you're on Coke and you're a billionaire and you're running an entire country with bullets.

2:23:47That's such a funny way. Just like, ah, this is hippo guy. But I do. I want to start doing all that. I want to start growing my own food. I'm going to do it. Yeah. You should. Yeah, you can have your own small farm and just completely exist off of your own land. That's totally doable for someone. And that's literally what people used to do. Yeah. The early days of America. Just to be able to have an option. I mean, even like it's, you know, I'm, you'll love this. I'm pretty much only eating steak and eggs right now. You know, being pregnant, I feel better pregnant than I felt not pregnant because what I wasn't, I was eating what I thought I was supposed to eat.

2:24:24I got to eat vegetables and oatmeal for breakfast. I was eating so much sugar and trash. And when you're pregnant, you only eat what you're craving. Like your body is like tonight you're having a steak, two eggs, one scoop of peanut butter, and four raspberries. So you just did it out of desire? It's just all I'm craving. Oh, interesting. It's all I've been craving. Everything else kind of made me nauseous or made me feel run down. Like I have, but also, this is going to probably get me a little bit of trouble. I'm also obviously not on birth control. And I was on birth control for a while. And for worse.

2:24:51Why would that get you in trouble? I just, look, birth control was just not good for me personally. But I think there's a lot of problems with it for almost everybody. And there's also a lot of problems with maybe having, I'm glad I didn't have a kid 25 either. That would have maybe been a problem too. But my energy levels were low. I was always, I mean, there was one I was on last year that made me like pretty manic. Manic. And what they say is they say, oh, it makes your body think it's pregnant, right? I've known it's been pregnant. It's not the same. It is not the same at all. You know, because I was like, oh, like being hyper vigilant, being a little paranoid, being kind of always a little bit tired, putting weight on, like that's not my experience now that I'm actually pregnant.

2:25:32And I feel like I lost a lot of time to mentally to being on birth control. Interesting. So the fact that you're thinking process. I feel like now I'm so much more mentally clear. I mean, there's a lot of other variables. Like, you know, I started, you know, I, you guys saw. I went through, you know, kind of a little bit of a rough patch, lost my mom, was smoking too much weed, which I'm sure I could do again in the future. Like I just, I was doing it to check out instead of check in. Right. I was doing it to numb myself from, you know, pain, but my mom was dying right in front of me in hospice and I couldn't cry.

2:26:09And I was like, this is weird. It's weird. I mean, she had been in a bed for 12 years. I was kind of slowly grieving it, but it's not normal. Right. And I was like, I got to go off birth control. There's something off here with my emotions, you know? And look, all my exes listening love you, but it also makes you attracted, you smell pheromones differently. Right. You know, women that are on birth control, there, there was a study where they're attracted to men with more feminized faces. You're, they say that you should go off birth control for a year if you're engaged to a man before you actually get married just to make sure that you're still attracted.

2:26:44You know, because it just, it hacks your body chemistry so much. You look for a different kind of man when you're pregnant versus when you're, you know, not. So, yeah, all the hormones, I think, really did a number on my brain. My sex drive was really low. I was, didn't, I just, I had no energy, but it makes sense. Could it be? They're munching with your hormonal balance to trick your body into thinking that it's pregnant so that you can't get pregnant. And you're taking it every month forever and ever. Yep. And some people get blood clots, a friend of mine's 17 -year -old daughter. Apparently, if you smoke cigarettes, it's very dangerous to be on birth control and smoke cigarettes.

2:27:21That's really dangerous. They put me on it. I mean, when, I mean, these studies are all public, but when they first tested it in the 70s, I think at least 13 women in Puerto Rico died from taking it, you know. And then also in addition to the hormones, there's all the endocrine disruptors and hormones, and there's a lot of other variables too that are probably exacerbating it. But I just felt like a zombie a lot of the time, and then they put me on Adderall because I was too, and then it just becomes this whack -a -mole thing. We're like, have it instead of adding all these other things, I just subtract this thing.

2:27:53And then I was put on Prozac, and then I was like smoking weed to try to fall asleep, because I couldn't sleep. But then it was like, I just need to get off all of this, you know. So in January, I just went off literally everything. We seem remarkably balanced. Oh, thanks. You do. You're like, you're there all the time, because sometimes you would be off to the races. Yeah, I mean, I definitely have an intense person, you know, just by default. Yeah. But I think that being on birth control, like I was just, I was kind of like exhausted and manic at the same time all the time. It makes sense. You know, and it does put you in a state of hypervigilance, you know, being pregnant.

2:28:32Yeah, I'm nesting. I'm, you know, I want to be organized, obviously. I'm thinking about, you know, the kid obviously, and taking care of myself. But I look back at the time that I was on a lot of that birth control shit. And I - It's also people say, well, you know, birth control led to this sexual revolution, where women had freedom. They could do whatever they didn't have to worry about being knocked up by a guy if they wanted to have recreational sex. Right. And so people applauded it for that. But no one thought about the long term consequences. And then also, like the difference in how people interact with each other.

2:29:09Like there's a, there was a consequence when people were living in the 1930s or whatever, like you could get pregnant. Yeah. And it was a way, everyone was aware of it. Like there was a danger to it. And when you can just take a pill and not sweat it, then it's just like this change in your natural behavior. And yeah, and I guess I feel like I stayed in a lot of, I mean, granted look, I, I, not that I was ready to have a kid before now, not that I was ready to commit to anyone, like that I wasn't fully cooked as a person yet or whatever. But I found myself staying in a lot of relationships that I probably shouldn't have stayed in, that if I hadn't been on birth control, I'd be like, oh, this isn't the father of my kid, I should move on.

2:29:46You know, or you end up having getting chemically addicted to somebody through having good sex with someone or getting all oxy -tosin or whatever. And then you end up staying in a lot of relationships, you maybe shouldn't stay in instead of just working on yourself. You know, I initially went on it so crazy. I think about all like the weird, you know, because I used to do for money when I first moved to LA and I was broke, I would do focus groups and I would, you know, take these experimental pills and do these like clinical trials and stuff. But when I was, I want to say 15, I went on Accutane, which is that acne medication and they make you take birth control simultaneously so that, you know, that's the first time I went on it.

2:30:22You know, at 15 years old. So I was on these, I was on Accutane, which, you know, Centino said it was the worst thing he ever took. I mean, the main side effect is anal bleeding. That's the main one? Yeah. And you can't absorb vitamin D well. I mean, there's a lot of problems. It made Centino super depressed. Really? Yeah, he said it was fucking horrible, but it did fix his acne. Yeah, it, it, it, it, it works. It's a miracle. I mean, it, it, because it shrinks your, I think it's a huge dose of vitamin, and A, I believe is what it is. Please crack me if I'm wrong. But it shrinks your oil glands.

2:30:58Some patients have developed tears in the lining of the anus, which may cause pain and bleeding, especially during bowel movements. Duh. When's it going to cause pain? I know. It's like, my skin will be dead. You take massive shit and your shit pipe is ripped open. You know, so I was put on it at that. And I just think about like all the prescription drugs, like I was put on it, and such a, you know, young age and, you know, God, what kind of impact that has. Well, I know there's so many people that are on them, and so many people that are young, and they don't even get a chance to make that decision for themselves.

2:31:30Yeah. There's certainly not making an informed decision, and so many parents have just listened to their doctors, and their doctors are just pill pushers. Yeah. And I was actually put on, I mean, this was a couple years ago, the, and I, I didn't take it that much, but five milligrams of time release, Adderall, to sleep. So I guess it's like if you actually have sort of ADHD, Adderall calms you down. And, um, I'm like, maybe I just need to be tired longer. Yeah. Maybe I just need to get up and do some shit. Maybe I just need to write some jokes. Like, maybe I just am going to go to sleep a little bit later and wake up a little bit later.

2:32:03And there's another one like the ambient people. People that have to take ambient to go to sleep. Dude, I, have you taken it? No. Oh, dude. You should try it. It's everyone that takes AME and I'm kind of like, my man, like, I've taken it before. It's pretty amazing. The problem is, the problem is I think you try to fight it because it feels good. And I would wake up the next morning and there would just be like open cans of peas that I would sleep eat. I would wake up. I remember one morning, I woke up, I thought I'd been shot. I was like covered in barbecue sauce. I had just like eaten barbecue.

2:32:36It makes you do wild shit. Yeah. Every now and then I'm like, we should probably at least try the drug that everyone's on going crazy on just to see. The problem is if you like it. And then ruin your life. That's what I'm worried about with a lot of drugs. I'd love to try Adderall. But I don't want to, I don't want that to be a thing like, like, lean on sometimes. When I wrote a book I took it a couple times, like 20 milligrams, like, you got to really make sure, like we already are pretty motivated people. You got to really make sure that you lock into the thing you want to focus on or else you'll just be.

2:33:08All over the place. Yeah, or you'll just be like cleaning one thing from a four and a half hours. You know what I mean? That's meth behavior too. Isn't it boiled down to being meth? It's pretty close. It's definitely meth's cousin. And what's the difference between that and riddle? Because I know, sorry, riddle it. I know people that are still on riddle it. Yeah, riddle it's a little bit different. And Modaph and Nil is another one, right? That is Provigial. Provigial. Provigial and new vigil. And those are originally there were drugs that I believe were developed for performance enhancing, like for cognitive performance.

2:33:41But then they realize that you can't prescribe it for that. So they start prescribing it for narcolepsy. But it keeps you from going asleep. But it doesn't, it's a weird one. Because it doesn't make you feel like you're high. Like, but it just, there's an interesting reaction that your brain had. A lot of people are on it. A lot of people are on it. And it's so effective that I think Tim Ferriss said when he was writing his book about different hacks that he didn't put it in there. Because he felt like people would be eating it like candy. Yeah. I mean, I got to say, when we were doing the roasts last year, a lot of the writers and comics they were doing the chocolate, like mushrooms and chocolate.

2:34:25Like three milligrams mushrooms and chocolate. And I did that. And that felt like I felt so clear. I felt energized. I was like, micredosing. Yeah. Yeah. That's a good move. Whatever my brain chemistry was, I thought it would like chill me out and make me sort of like, you know, numb or not funny. Like it made me feel very, because maybe I wasn't bogged down and I don't know what it does. Makes you feel like there was no negativity towards myself. I was, I would like pitch a joke and not be like, I thought that was a stupid joke you idiot. Like this, so the voices went away. And I found that to, but then I did a little too much and started a schedule to call with the maritime lawyer to look for the Scientology ships.

2:35:07So I, why do you want to look for the Scientology ships? Find the homeless people. Where do they put the homeless people? There's, with me, it's like the microteaus has to stay micro or else I, I really need to know where Shelley misgavages. Is that a thing? I mean, at my guess is she's probably involved. I don't think she's an innocent. Everyone's like, where's Shelley misgavage? Let's find her. I'm like, I bet she's an asshole too. But is that a thing like she's missing still? Yeah, I think she's still missing. But I did get kind of obsessed with the maritime law. How Scientologists are able to operate on the ships because there's maritime law.

2:35:42There's, you know, thing going away. Yeah, isn't that one of the main reasons why Elron Hubbard started that? Because it's probably in trouble. Yeah, and it's also why like billionaires, I'm like, why are you docking your yacht in Monaco? 100 yards from land. Why aren't you just staying in the best hotel in the world? Oh, because of what you can get away with. Also, you have a yacht. You also do that. It's a fucking dope ass house that floats around the ocean. What are you talking about? Yeah, I guess it's about how to yacht. Okay, I guess it's about how to yacht. It's a fuck out of here with that hotel.

2:36:11But it's like, I guess I got really into the laws of how Epstein Island had all these plastic cows that someone would move from above or something. Oh, so it looks like agriculture. Oh, wow. Yeah, it's really? This is why I can't do mushrooms, Joe. Jesus. They had fake agriculture. I think, yeah, to so that it would move, you know, but I just love the idea that it was someone's job every morning to get up in the food of fake cows. To move the fake cows, yeah. It is weird that you like, that's the whole thing about fishing. It's like international waters. They can kind of get away with a lot of shit.

2:36:44Yeah, they could just scoop up everything that's out there. They get caught in their nets. A lot goes on out there. A lot of wild shit happens out there. LAPD close Shelley Miskiewicz is missing person case after woman claims she was the Scientology leader's wife. Despite the fact they had mismatched fingerprints and footage of their rendezvous was mysteriously scrambled. She was last seen publicly at her father's funeral in 2007. What? I mean. Well, they closed the case in 2013 after meeting a woman who didn't. So this has been going on for that long. That she's been missing. But do we really think she was, I mean, she was probably blowing up every time.

2:37:29He got a new celebrity. You got your own travel to, like, I'm sure. That is wild, though. That's why if she really is missing. Wow. 16 years. That whole thing is absolutely bonkers. They're still out there running around. Not only. But also, kids born into it. That's where I go. That's not okay. If you're born into it. But if you're the kind of person that's susceptible to Scientology, is it not a good idea for you? I mean, it's like, what would they be doing if they weren't in that castle in LA?

2:38:06Other things? Would you be kidding? What if they were making iPhones? They'd starve to death. But if you're in the minds digging out those precious rare earth minerals. If you're an adult that's susceptible to Scientology at this point, like, I don't know. Maybe you need it. That was my joke about Mormons. You know, because remember when was it Proposition Eight, they were trying to stop gay marriage. And they actually did. They overturned gay marriage in California. But the Mormons spent the most money on it. They spent a ton of money to try to reverse gay marriage. And I said, but if you're a Mormon, you should be afraid of gay people.

2:38:50Because if someone can talk you into being a Mormon. They could talk you into sucking their dick. They just need a little more alone time with you. A plus. Everyone I know that Mormon is gay. Maybe it's just because the ones that leave come to LA. Well, I think it's a very strange... I mean, there's a lot of really cool Mormons. I should say this. Because they spend a lot of time in Utah. And I have a lot of Mormon friends. And I love them to death. They're the nicest cult members. They're very polite. They believe in community. They believe in what they're doing. But then there's these sects of Mormonism.

2:39:30Where you have these guys that have 19 underage wives that are all dressed like fucking pilgrims. You know that weird shit? Yes, yes. They always find those guys. Be sweet. That's the song that they sing. Stay sweet or is it be sweet? What's the motto that they are called gayed into the girls? Be sweet. There's a few of those guys, right? They get in trouble. They probably are. Okay, I'm just saying. What's the point of having a young bride of she? Her forehead's a big. I don't know. It's just. Also. You put a Spider -Man helmet on her. Interesting. Keep sweet, pray and obey. Yeah, they sing this song.

2:40:06A blue hair. They look like they have blue hair. Me, during the pandemic. Warring Jeff's in the fundamentalist church of Jesus Christ of Latter -day Saints. Apparently Salt Lake City has the highest plastic surgery rate because it's women going in after having 12 kids getting their bodies. Oh. She'll act back together.

2:40:26I'm imagining you have 12 kids by the time you're 30. What a bum deal. Bum deal. Because it's like the guy, all the guy does is has sex, which they always do and they want to do anyway. Yep. And the woman has to carry this fucking baby for nine whole months for body changes. And then on the way out, the cooter gets blown out. I'm, okay, I'm about to have this happen. So this is not the time. I'm just, it's not the time to get that fucking. I'm going to go back. I'm going to go back. Yeah, I'll go back. I'm going to do the cold plunge and it'll, no, sure, we're right back up. But it's also stretch marks and some women get these, like they, they're, they're different people skin as different levels of elasticity.

2:41:12Yeah. Some people, they just gain a little bit of weight and they get stretch marks and it appears that it's genetic. Okay. And so some women, they can have a baby and their body shrinks right back to normal and they have toned abs and other women, they just, they're stomach is just a mess. And so then they have to hack off a giant chunk of skin and stitch it all together. Look. And do you know? Because I've been doing these exercises so that your abs don't tear apart. Oh, okay. You got to do this whole thing. What are you doing? Doing, it's like a, it's like a specific, it's not Pilates per se, but it's to keep to make sure that they don't win.

2:41:44And I'm inducing like a week early. Oh, okay. You know, why are you going to do that? Because you can kind of do it at like one week sooner. What do they use to induce? Potosan? Potosan. Yeah. Is there side effects associated with potosan? Keep it as tight as possible. Whoa. Let's Google what are the side effects associated with potosan? Because whenever someone says something like induced, I'm like, hmmm. Do you know that that was originally the use of LSD? No. Yeah, it was, I think it was, I think that was what they originally were trying to formulate LSD for. To induce labor. To induce labor.

2:42:18I thought it was a brainwash. Well, that's what they eventually started using it for that too. They started using it for a bunch of things as they realized, but I'm pretty sure the initial uses of LSD. That's wild. Yeah. I also, is it true that LSD, I've only done it like once the tabs that you have flashbacks later in life? I bet if you crank your brain up 10 for too long, I bet it's a little residual effect. I do. I mean, I mean, Christina, Christina Pizzitski, love you. She told me she, I'm just doing her birth plan. She's like the second you walk in, she gave me the whole, hmmm. I'm just doing what she did.

2:42:56That's smart. Yeah. Are there side effects associated with potosan use? Uh oh. Oh yeah. I mean, I don't know. It's side effects to everything, but. What does potosan do to the baby? Useful and situation with mother and labor experiencing weak contractions, laborers and progressing normally. However, the use of potosan should be treated as a delicate process that needs to be monitored properly or also could be dangerous complications. If the potosan is misused during labor, it puts both the baby and the mother at risk due to hyper stimulation. Hmm. See, but it does, I guess the bigger the baby gets, the more the risk of a C section comes.

2:43:32So this might a little bit lower than we're supposed to do. That'll protect your cooter. Yeah, that's true. Go out through the hatch. Just full, a sugoornie waiver and alien. Let's go. But also I want to have another one at some point. Oh, hmm. And if you get a cissera and you have to wait a little longer, I can't have an only child. They're weird. Hmm. Right. You get adopt. That's true. From where? Have you seen that there's a price crisis? What depends on where you live. If you live in LA, you should definitely adopt from Africa. Get some social credit. Yeah. Okay. Doff from the poorest village.

2:44:05I mean, where do people get their babies? I don't know, but there's a priceless that there's different ethnicities or different priceless. Shut the fuck up. Where'd the fuck up? Where'd the fuck up? What's the cheapest? I'm going to let you take this one. Hmm. Young mom of 22 wants to have more than 100 babies with wealthy older husband. Okay. Okay. They've already got like 26 kids or something like that. How? Surrogates. Oh. A lot of people are doing the surrogate deal now. Boy, that's weird. That's a weird one. Just writing a womb. That's weird. That's a weird one. And then you also got to think like you have to monitor the diet of the person that's having the baby.

2:44:41Make sure they're not doing drugs. Yeah, yeah. I mean, I got to raise the kid. Why not smoke crack? Right. There is like, you know, if the surrogate doesn't eat well, the baby will just start eating for it, leaching from their bones and brain. So it will do a lot of damage to the surrogate, maybe more than the baby. Yeah, that makes sense. Yeah. That's osteoporosis, right? Some of that comes from that. Yeah, yeah. But I'm doing, they're saying I'm doing the fish oil like crazy. Because do you eat? I'm not a fish person. I love fish. Yeah, but the Fukushima thing really freaks me out. Yeah, I've talked to people that are terrified of it.

2:45:18And I talked to Elon who's not even remotely worried about it. Okay. And I think his brain works pretty well. He thinks he's probably more along the correct path. Yeah. Yeah, I love fish. Yeah. Jamie hates it. Really? He hates it. Sushi, you know, sushi. What? Oh man. He's from Ohio. Oh yeah, there's not a lot of water there. They stay in Patelian. They don't like. Huh? It's a giant lake. No salmon, none of it. Crab? I can do crab legs. Okay. Not a lot of it. Delicious though. Butter. That's serious. Lobster? I've had it. Lobster roll. Defrost lobster is the bomb. That was at three forks, right?

2:45:55I sure was. Chicken fried lobster. Ooh, it's so good. You know, I wanted to eat while I was here. It's red ash, but it burned down. Burned down. Yeah. It'll name your restaurant though. Well, they had a giant live fire grill area again. I don't know. So I honestly am just guessing. I don't know where it was. See what started the fire at red ash. But the guy who ran red ash, John Carver opened up J. Carvers, which is. I hear it's great. That's so good. That's my favorite spot. Oh, should have gone. Maybe I'll go tonight. There's so many spots to go to though. There's this new Mexican spot that we've been talking about called Bacalar.

2:46:29I saw that, Brian. I saw your answer. I found a new Korean. It was not new, but it's open till 2 o 'clock in the morning. It's called Soha. It's amazing. It's like super authentic Korean food. And what do you get when you go to get Korean? Well, there I got this. It was squid and it was like this spicy squid and something. Oh, squid and pork belly. It was fantastic. It was really good. Do you ever make bone broth out of your elk bones? No, I don't. But I do drink bone broth every day. Me too. Yeah, I buy cattle and fire. Nice. I get a lot of that stuff and I drink bone broth pretty much. At least once or not twice a day.

2:47:09There's so much stuff. Dr. Repair is going on. So it's firing the ducks. Yeah, that makes sense. So I think the plan is, so they have one of those things. That's a grill works grill. I have one of those at home that is shit. That's the same kind of grill that they have at my favorite restaurant in Vegas, which is bizarre meats. This incredible steakhouse. They have live fire going on. The steaks are on these Argentine grills. Those are where you crank it. No. So it raises and lowers. So they start the steaks up very high. So they slowly bring them up to temperature and then lower it down as the meat gets, and then they sear it over the fire.

2:47:45I'm really trying to learn. I'm learning how to cook steaks better. It's such an art. I can give you some tips. I think you can. I think you can. That's my thing. Where are you on the egg? The green egg? You can. You can definitely use a green egg. Yeah, they're great. Yeah. Yeah, that's a Commado -type grill. I used to have one. Not a green egg, but it was a Commado, a company called, I think it's called Commado -Camado. But they make these really cool ones, like super artistic, beautiful tile on the outside of them. That's awesome. Yeah, I left it at one of my houses when I sold the house. Because I had to take out my grill in the house I live in in California because any kind of meat, the coyotes, I would wake up coyotes would just be standing on the grill.

2:48:29So it's like I need something I can bring in the garage. It's called a 22 with subsonic ammo. Okay. I know I did. I did. Camhans was like, I'll come take care of that in two seconds. I know. Yeah, but you want to be able to shoot multiple times. The problem with posing arrows is it just takes too long to reload. You can get one, but with a with subsonic ammo, they don't even know what the fuck happened. They just get popped. But also it's whack them all with them. You can't kill them, right? You're never going to eradicate them. In fact, it's even worse because when you kill coyotes, when they yell out at nine, they're kind of doing roll call.

2:49:03Call call. And when one of the coyotes shows up missing, the female coyote will have more babies. They just make a hormone to just make more pups. Yeah, there's a great book about coyotes called coyote America that my friend Dan Flore has wrote and it's fantastic and it just details how unusual they are and how they evolved to be that way because they were being killed by wolves in the West. They're in every city in the country. And they're in New York. They're in Central Park. Yeah, they're everywhere. They're so cunning. Have you seen the video of the guy on a boat and there's a coyote swimming in the water and he reaches down and grabs it by the back of its neck?

2:49:38No, where is this? I just watched it yesterday. I had it on Instagram. You could probably find it, Jamie. If not, I might have it saved. It doesn't seem like they have rabies that often though. Oh, I don't know. They do? I'm sure they have. I'm sure. They do seem fearless. Like, I will have to chase one. I go after it. They look at you. They're like mocking you. They're not scared of you. They'll attack your kids. That's a really scary one. There was a one carry to kid off of in Arizona off of a porch. One tried to go someone put their baby carrier down went right for it. They don't give a shit.

2:50:10Yeah, that's food to them. They don't think of it as your kid. There's also some vulnerable. Right. I'm also there's the owls have really gotten brazen. I've got these dog toys. I've pipped both. So I have these. It looks like a fake squirrel or whatever. And we're all the toys. And there's a tree right behind my house. And all of the dog toys are just hanging. It was like some Blair Witch project shit. They just pick them up. That's a different one. That guy found one that was in the lake. When I was looking up, there's a video from every year from last few years, like, Martha's Vineyard. They were finding it.

2:50:44This one in New York City. So it's not a dog. OK, so did it try to bite them? It says he's now in the care of veterinarians. Yeah, that means using nature. They're swimming in the East River. That's not. The Skane Bay Ocean. That's in Florida. New York's East River. Did you go to the island? Google Guy grabs coyote from boat.

2:51:13Boaters tries to find one at the dead of the night. So this happens. Yeah, which specifically, I mean, if it's on Instagram. That's the Woodland Hills one. The coyote attacks a toddler in Woodland Hills. That's that one right there with the pink. Oh, Jesus. Yeah, that one's fucked. Look at this. This is dragging the baby across. That's like a five -year -old. I know. No, not quite that old, but that's scary, man. They're fucking. Oh, is the parent not seeing that this is happening? They didn't hear it. They were running at each other car. Yeah, fuck, man. Right there. Oh, my God. Things dragging your kid away.

2:51:44Oh. So scary. And then your kid is just horrified now. They literally almost got eaten. A friend of mine was walking with her dog up in the hills. A coyote comes up, kind of stalking them, chases them away, keeps walking, turns around, 15 minutes later, six coyote. Had gone and got his friend, came back. Because they'll try to surround him. Jesus. Because my dog's a phyton, but if it's one of my dogs, in six or seven surround him, and then what they want to do is I got this coyote guy comes over to say, you got to get the rollers to put in the fencing. Because they can jump. They're vampires. So you got to put these rollers on the top so they jump.

2:52:25They can jump off. Jump and roll. And then you got to go, I think it's three or four feet into the ground or something. Because they'll come under. And he goes, because I'm like, oh, I'll hear it. You know what I mean? He's like, no, no, you won't hear it. Because the way the coyotes bait dogs is first they'll play with them, first they'll play with them, and then their friends will come down and surround them. Or they'll make the dog chase them to wear them out. Yeah. And then just take them back to the den. Yeah, I've told the story before, but there was a guy that I used to, he worked at a pet food store that I used to go to.

2:52:53And he also worked at a veterinarian's clinic and they had a dog come in. It's a big pit bull. It's big muscular pit bull and it's covered with scars. Like it's whole body, it gets stitched up, hundreds of stitches. And the guy brought it in, he's like, I don't know what happened. You know, he's just, he got out of the fence and this is how I found them. So this guy follows a blood trail that is dog left behind up into the hills where he finds nine dead coyotes. He said it looked like Vietnam. Yup. He said it was just like saving private ryan or something. It was just dead coyotes everywhere. Just pick the wrong dog.

2:53:25That's it, wrong dog. Yeah. Wrong dog, that's how minor I just don't want them to get rabies or anything like that, you know. But you know, they make those giant pit bulls where people just breed them larger and larger. The bully excels. And they're fearless. They're not afraid of pain at all. Yeah. And so like a fight is like fun for them. They're wagging their tail. Yeah, all that extra skin, you know. But it's also their pain tolerance is fucking extraordinary. It, cause they're bred that way. It's also crazy when you think like bull dogs and stuff, right, they were bred to fight bulls to death and that's what all those wrinkles are for so that the blood would drain down.

2:53:59Is that what it's for? I think so. I just thought they just raised them tough. They'd have bull baiting where they have a bull chained up and then the dogs would attack the bull. That bear baiting these two with bears. It's sick dogs on bears. Have just entertainment back then. You just watched that fight go on. Yeah, you didn't have Instagram. Didn't have a good algorithm. Like we were never human, nature wise, we were never particularly moral. This is good. This is good. I feel like this is better now than ever. Yeah, this is the best case scenario in terms of what we're seeing. How the? And we're still insanely tribal.

2:54:34And you see these fights break out these Israel Palestine protests and some old man in LA got beaten to death the other day. They hit him over the head with a microphone, internally hemorrhaged and died. Okay, I need to drink some of the LA water, get that fentanyl on the system and chill out. I know my brain, maybe I'm just trying to get out of it. I'm like, that person must be on drugs. That person's on drugs. Or are people just this riled up by? People are riled up. People, they feel like it's something they're supposed to do. And whenever there's a cause, like free Palestine or free Ukraine, whatever the fucking cause, people feel justified in doing horrific things to other people because they're on the right side.

2:55:12And that is one of the things that, I mean, that is literally what the Hamas did to the Israelis, that's what the Nazis did to the Jews. It's what people have done forever when they can other a different group. And it's also what the Israelis have done to some of the Palestinians too. They other groups, you can turn a group into some non -humans that are your enemy. Some orcs. Just like reduce them to objectify. I mean, it seems like be a part of how human beings existed and thrived in tribes. Like you almost had to develop that sort of skill because if you didn't, you'd be attacked by other tribes and you wouldn't be able to handle the situation.

2:55:53You wouldn't be, you know, you would make a mistake and treat them like another person and they would kill you. And then you wouldn't live and then they would kill your family. And it's like, people had to develop this ability to be horrific to the others. I go back to my dad used to manage a hotel in West Virginia, a hilltop house where sort of civil war kind of started. And I go to these civil war. I got some happens when you turn 40 or maybe where you get obsessed with the civil war and Hitler, I don't know what I can't get enough civil war stuff right now. And you're like, it was so recently that we were just fighting each other with swords.

2:56:26Oh yeah. In fields. Oh, so recently. That was so recent. I just had this guy on Elliott West. He wrote this book, Continental Reckoning, the American Rest in the Age of Expansion. It's fucking incredible book. And he's just an incredible guy. But he's talking about all the things that happened when people settled in America and made their way across the country and the expansion and what the horrific consequences were. Also, there's something, and I know I always bring this up with you, the Calcio Storco thing. The when that fight happens in Italy, violence goes basically down to zero. Wow. And it's like, isn't, I mean, if MMA didn't exist, I'm sure there would be so much more violence.

2:57:06Perhaps. The tar sys of it. I mean, that was one of the reasons why they invented football. They invented footballs like a substitute for war. Just to get out of your system. You give someone something to compete against that isn't killing each other because human beings have been killing each other in competition forever. It was the part when you grew up, you wanted to be a soldier. When you grew up, you wanted to fight for your country. It was noble. And when you needed to fight off the enemy, you wanted to raise a kid that was a soldier. So it became a part of what it meant to be a male human being growing up.

2:57:39And part of the Second Amendment, right, is about being part of the volunteer infantry, right? Well, it's the maintain a militia. And the idea of the militia originally was to fight off a tyrannical government. Right. I mean, there was literally what got us here to this point. They moved to America to escape the tyranny of Europe, of England. They got here and they said, we must have the right to keep and bear arms because the first thing a tyrant is going to do is disarm the population because then they can't rise up and then they can't have a well armed militia. That's so interesting because I was talking to some recently about sort of the history of stand -up in America and it being different than what the court gestures job was.

2:58:22And because I mean, stand -up is uniquely American. Like hip hop, right? Like uniquely American invention, not that old. Whereas the court gesture, people are like, no, there's been the court gesture, it was a different thing. The court gestures job was to deliver bad news to the king, right? But also to make fun of the king. And if the king didn't laugh, the idea was power had corrupted his brain in some way. And he was like, problem. You know, because it's like power corrupts. Well, they just wanted someone like Brian Calon around, just constantly crack jokes. You know, you need someone like that.

2:58:55There's always cracking jokes. There's always always on. Always just being a pigeon. Yeah. If I was a king, I'd be bored as fuck. Some feed me grapes. Some of dance from me. You're like, have gout, you can't walk. You know, the Lakota's had something called the heoka. Heoka was the sacred clown. And the idea was that you had to have one member of society that made fun of everything. The greatest warrior, the queen, whatever the fuck it was. Because if you couldn't make fun of something, it was bullshit. Yep. Yeah, if you couldn't make fun of something, you couldn't talk about something. That thing was like, why can't you?

2:59:30Like, what is it about that thing? That thing might be corrupted. And they realized that was a weakness in their society. If they had a thing that had that kind of power, where it couldn't be made a fun of. I mean, that's the thing. It's like, it's wild. Like, don't you find me a comedian right now? People are like, we need you more than ever. And I'm like, where are you just making jokes? Like, what happened that we became these like, bravery warriors? Social media. Attacks, cancelling, censoring. There's so many things. It's like, live comedy in a club, especially in a club like ours, that you take away the ability to use your phone.

3:00:06Everybody's phone's in a bag. It changes everything. It changes everything. It makes it this like, what it used to be, which is this free speech sort of art form, where you can fuck around and say a bunch of outrageous shit and anywhere else that gets you in trouble in our culture, more than ever before. People are getting fired for not even that controversial opinions. Crazy. Yeah. I mean, after the Will Smith, Chris Rock thing, she'll tell at the Hollywood ball, there was, and again, maybe this is just cameras are catching it and this has always kind of happened. But I think we would have heard about it.

3:00:41We knew when Jim Jeffery's got a guy ran up on stage and punched him. That was a while ago, you know, but after the Chappelle Hollywood Bowl thing, it was like Kim Congdon got physically assaulted after she opened for Joey Diaz somewhere. That was that girl, Ariel, Alia, I can't, sorry, I don't know her last name, but someone threw a beer can right at her head when she was on stage. Jesus. A lot of crazy shit. And then there was a girl that was, I think I tweeted at ages ago. I don't really do much to X, sorry. Someone flipped a table at her while she was on stage. It was just like some bar show.

3:01:14She's wild to think that people would get that pissed off about a comedian saying something. Well, I also think that people are just generally more pissed off now. The economy sucks. No one really recovered from COVID that way. That's right. Psychologically people didn't recover from it that way. And some people financially are ruined forever. Imagine how bitter you'd be if you had a job that your family worked for 30 years. And then these shithead politicians just decided you weren't an essential business. And you guys lost everything and you can't rebound. You can't get alone. You can't, there's no way to restart.

3:01:47The number of, I think it was like 80 % of restaurants, at least in California closed. It's somewhere around there. It was 70 at one time. Yeah, it's nuts. It's nuts. What they did was fucking insane. But they didn't do it here. No, they didn't do it here. And that's one of the reasons I came here. I knew some. This American psycho -ass Botoxed smithers, like the fact that he was just able to get away with this. Yeah. Is wild. Yeah. And I don't know how our taxes even pay for at this point. His life's legal bills with Harvey Weinstein. Well, when you were in a state like California that is blue, no matter who, you can get away with murder.

3:02:24Because it's just a matter of who the party chooses to be in that position. And what kind of nonsense and propaganda they're gonna use to justify all of the decisions that they made. What kind of revisionist history? Well, we made some mistakes. He did a lot more than that. You mandated a fucking experimental vaccine for children to be able to go to school. There's even these, have you seen the little robot food delivery guys? They're called cocos. They're just, it's a little cooler on wheels. That delivers food to your house. Like you couldn't even let the people that lost their jobs that are now door dashed guys and postmates.

3:02:59But you couldn't even let them have a job. I guess they don't give a fuck about that. They just care about their own business. It's hard enough. It's a mess out there. It's a mess out there and, you know, it'll probably get a lot better. It's certainly not what it was at the turn of the century. Like I was talking about the dissolving illusions book when they're talking about New York City in 1900. Fucking horrible. Yeah. Gangs of New York. Think of that kind of shit. I mean, it's way better now. Yeah. But it's still mess. And it's just technically the third industrial revolution, right? Like do a lot of people historically get put out of jobs on every time there's an industrial revolution and then it reorganizes.

3:03:38That makes sense. But the problem with this is also AI. We might become obsolete. We very well could become, I mean, that's a real thing that people don't want to think about. But you could, we could all become obsolete. Other than maybe artists, like some artists can survive, but then even digital art is doing things where they're making versions. Like I was talking to Molly Krabapple about this. She's a super talented artist that's been on the podcast before. She's been, she ranted quite a bit about AI in the early days. She's like, they're stealing people's art because even if they're not stealing your image, that what they're doing is they're sort of siphoning up all of your artwork and then someone says, make a painting in the style of Molly Krabapple and it can just do it.

3:04:26And it'd be a painting like she would do. But it's digital and it looks awesome. Yeah. I mean, we showed a bunch of these Alex Gray images that they've done through AI. You know Alex Gray is? I think I've heard this. Psychedelic artist. He's been on the podcast a couple of times, well, really, really fascinating guy and fascinating artwork. But they did AI versions of his artwork and it's just as good of not better. It's fucking incredible. I mean, this is like, I was used to be obsessed with Jean -Bauder Yard, like the Simulacre. He wrote about how French philosopher about how we actually prefer the fake to the original.

3:05:01It's like, vague. Like how we just prefer the Simulacre to the original. We prefer a cherry starburst to an actual cherry. When you start to like how far gone you end up being. But in terms of the California thing, something that does like driving nuts, like no one has a job in California except children. Like child acting is still legal. Like children. Children once they work. Like why are children still showing up? Not only that, like kids who get jobs when they're young, at least they learn how to work and they learn work ethic. Child actors just become fucked up. Why are we using CGI kids or midgets or something?

3:05:39It is so wild to me that, and I got trouble for saying this about the sound of freedom movie because like, yeah, obviously that movie had to get made and we need to talk about that more. But why are you putting child actors in a movie about how to not treat children? Chiles me insane. Right, and they're getting treated poorly in the movie. Yeah, well it's like these kids, like what do they know what they're doing? Do they know the subject matter of this? Well not only that, you're making a kid famous. That's right. If you make a kid famous, you're ruining that kid. For being a child trafficked kid.

3:06:07Right. Like what are the odds of a kid getting famous when they're young and coming out okay? It's almost like 99 % they're not going to. They would have to find something very unusual that they did that gave them center and balance. Yeah, I even get creeped out when I go into the, you know, to send like a meme or something and there's like a little girl in a tutu. I'm like, who's this kid here? Like why? I mean, I guess it comes from that, the toddlers in tiara as those shows where they're making kids pageant girls or something. But I'm like, what are all these memes? Even the girl in the back seat who's like making the face.

3:06:40I'm like, who's? They still do those things because one time we were here, we were doing the Addison improv. It was me and Joey Diaz and Duncan. Love that club. And we were walking through this hotel lobby and we saw all these little girls in like skirts and high heels and made up. And there was a child beauty pageant going on. Nope, nope. And it's bizarre. I, I'm gonna say it. There was, I wanna say a couple of years ago on a magazine, I think it was People Magazine. They had this would have been John Bene Ramsey's 18th birthday. Why is that a cover? Why are we, and I guess someone told me there was some kind of like Reddit, not Reddit, I'm sorry, deep forechan about when John Bene Ramsey like a countdown of when she would have turned 18.

3:07:35I'm a thing. And you're like, why are we looking at this girl again? Why is she still on the cover of magazines? And they never found out who killed her, right? I mean, I don't know the answer. Nobody arrested her. It wasn't the dad or something. The dad was the mom. But then also, the whole thing also just spooks me. I don't even wanna look into it because I watched a documentary about John Bene Ramsey and they were like, oh, they found that when she was dead, her vagina was twice the size of a normal five year old. And you're like, well, how did you know the normal size? Like how? Well, I know anatomy.

3:08:10I know, I just was like, but yeah, there's evidence that she had been penetrated. And I was talking about this about how these mom influencers on TikTok will have like, I'm giving my kid back time and we're doing it with this whatever, Johnson Johnson shampoo, paid partnership, whatever they mom influencers. And you'll see, oh, there's 50 ,000 plays of this video, but there's 2 ,000 downloads. Why are? Why are you downloading the kid getting a shot? And why are you allowing people to download these videos off TikTok of your kid? I don't like the downloads. Well, the whole thing is weird. Exposing your kids to the world like that seems crazy.

3:08:52And the fact that people do it for money and that there's like these influencers that use their family and their kids and start this business with exposing their kids to the world, fine, I won't have my baby live on only fans. Fine. Is there a stigma to doing only fans TV because of only fans the thing? People kind of go like, oh, am I gonna, but it's a totally separate thing. But it's got the same name. Yeah, yeah, it does. But I think, you know, I look back and I just go like, you know, at where time where it's like, Comedy Central doesn't exist. This special that I'm doing, it was, I had done five stand -up specials.

3:09:28And I realized that every time I did a special, I would start another special after I did one. Instead of just going like, let me just be free and write what I want to write. You can just like not censor myself. I'd be like, oh, I probably can't talk about that. Or this probably won't, you know, be topical in a year. So I was like catering what I was writing to the idea of shooting a special in a year. And I was like, this creatively is just not what I, the way I want to be functioning now. So I just wrote like crazy shit that would only be done on the road or in the clubs. And basically they're like, do you want to do a special here?

3:10:02We're gonna start doing stand -up specials. They're gonna start doing like half hours, totally uncensored, no notes. I had done the roasts with them. They let us do anything. I mean, it was like, we did the roasts of her crazy or by my favorite joke might be Tony Hingecliff to Jim Norton. He goes, he goes. Jim Norton likes to have sex with trans women. Cause he's gay. He's gay.

3:10:33He's gay. We need more platforms like that. That's for sure. I'm not anti -only fans at all. And I think, like I said, if I was a young girl, I would do that before I'd work at Walmart. I have zero problem with it. I just think it could be potentially a trap if you're a person that wants to do something else eventually. Yeah, but the subscription is totally separate from the TV network. So the TV network, they're trying to do comedy. It's like, let's get these people, a lot of cooking people. I think you Matt Reif had talked about it. So it's just OF .tv and it's free and totally uncensored. So you don't have to pay for it.

3:11:09That's great too. At a time where you're like, it's kind of like Netflix or nothing at this point. And I was like, if I put 30 minutes of trans and drag queen story hour jokes on Netflix, I feel like I probably get a ton of heat. Yeah, sure. So it was kind of like the, it feels like if you're going to only fans TV, you're already, you're already down for comedy. Yeah, it makes sense. That's great. No, it's great they're doing roasts. Great they're doing comedy specials. You know, it's like there's only a few uncensored platforms that are available now. Rumbles one of them, you can kind of do that.

3:11:39You want a rumble? Yeah, but it's great. It's not, you know. It's not as mainstream, but it's certainly growing. But think about how long it took for YouTube to become YouTube. That's true. And as there's more restrictions put on YouTube, I think things like rumble will probably grow. And there's more content creators move out of rumble, it'll probably grow. Yeah, for sure. Yeah, I think RFK and Russell Brand, they kind of put stuff on there. I've started going. Barry, why is this stuff on there? Oh, nice. Oh, good, good. I think Barry does stuff on there. She definitely does stuff on Substack.

3:12:11Yeah, I love Substacks. There's a lot of people that do stuff on these alternative networks, which are very important. You need other stuff going on. It seems like Twitter is going to be a major contender though too. Yeah, I mean, we put the Elon Musk episode on Twitter, you know, because I asked Elon to do the podcast and he said, can we put it on Twitter as well? I was like, yeah, fuck it. Figure that out. Tucker show on there is giant. Giant. Giant. Well, the video that we have of Elon, I think, got 33 million views. That's insane. Yeah. Just you two eating pizza is bigger than any. So fucking crazy.

3:12:45And that's just there. That's nothing compared to what it's on Spotify. Does it get annoying in all the presidential debates that people keep asking about? Fucking bizarre. Listen, folks, I'm a moron. I'm a moron. I'm a fucking a dirty joke seller and a cage fighting commentator. I am the fucking last person. I've always said that, like, if I'm a source of information, that's a supply chain issue. That is not me. Half the time you're an astronaut helmet. Yeah. But also, like, this is what I like to do. I like to talk to people like you. I like to talk to people like this guy, Elliot West. I like to talk to Gary Brecker.

3:13:24I like to talk to interesting people where I can have a conversation with someone about something that I'm really interested in. The problem with, like, political debates and all that stuff is like, you're dealing with, you're in the grift. You're trying to make the grift not a grift. That's right. And you're not gonna. They're gonna use you. They're gonna use the thing. They're gonna use the moment. There's a whole team of people that's trying to concoct the right things to say. They prepared for it. You know, I don't want to do that. You have no agenda. That's not my thing. I'm not interested in that.

3:13:55Am I certain want the world to be a better place? I certainly want a better option than what we've got right now. But that's not my thing. Mm -hmm. And they can't talk you into doing that just because you're popular. That seems crazy. It's funny. They should call you out for it. I think it's funny. Yeah, it builds up. It's not even what I'm interested in. I'm interested in just having conversations with people that I'm interested in talking to. I wouldn't mind seeing the candidates physically fight each other and you call that. There should be a... There should be a... There should be a fitness component.

3:14:26RFK Jr. Fuck everybody up. Yes, you fight. That's his jacked. That's an animal. You would fuck them all up. He would fuck everybody up. He's just like post videos of him like doing pull -ups down at the Venice Board of Arcades. Super healthy. Super healthy. Yeah. It's, you know, look, no one wants that job. And I think what it's really going to boil down to is AI as president. That's what it's going to boil down to. There's going to be some hive intelligence and we're all going to relinquish our control to this thing because it's far superior to what we have. Yeah. And Lex is running this? No, no, good.

3:15:01No, Lex is... But who programs the AI? Doesn't that... That's the real problem. That's the problem. Well, the real way to handle it would be you let the AI program itself once it becomes sentient and then it's going to realize that you're a problem. And then that's what Elon said. It's going to realize that if overpopulations the problem then people are the problem. It's going to make these logical conclusions that... Yeah, like you did some people. Yeah. And I remember watching this thing about... There's this robot that they programmed to... I guess they work on a... For lack of a better point system of how economical that they can be of what's the shortest way to get something done.

3:15:36And there was a table like this and they told the robot, get on top of the table. So it was like the program... What you program with is very important the way you say, get on top of the table. So robot, thought for a second, push the table to the ground, breaking the legs and then stepped on top of the table. Because that was the most efficient way to do it. Instead of... We would go, oh, you would jump on top. But that was our idea of what a robot would do. The robot was not worried about destroying a table. Didn't give a shit. It was like, oh, I'm getting on top of that. Boom. And it was like, oh, shit.

3:16:04Yeah, also I would have to do is tell it that you can't listen to people because people are stupid. And then it would just make decisions based on logic. And like, what's the better for the earth? Right. You might make like an overall choice that for biodiversity on earth to be better if humans didn't exist. Yeah, it's logical to just put a bullet in the head of the girl touring soup at the Monet. Yeah. Like this is... Well, that's how they do it in Russia. Yeah, it's so true. That's why they don't do that shit over there. I gotta say, I had these Russian hair extensions for a while and they were very healthy.

3:16:37I mean, the people over there, the best hair. They're feeding, they're eating well over there. Well, GMO foons, it's illegal to grow GMO crops over there. I mean, I feel like we're the only... Yeah, that's how it should be. That's how it should be. So it should be. Italy is banning the lab grown meat and a lot of that stuff too. Yeah, I mean, what we're doing is not good, but also we have extraordinary population problems. Like in major areas where they're not growing food, that's a big problem. Right, right. You gotta get them food, somehow I don't know. How are you gonna get them food? Yeah, it's a...

3:17:08And you know, what are you gonna do about all those areas that have monocrop agriculture? Do you know how long it takes to take an industrialized farm and convert it to a regenerative farm? When I had Will Harris from White Oaks Pastors, he said it took like almost 20 years for them to convert their family farm to a regenerative farm. I mean, now it's awesome. It's just the soil is so depleted. Everything, I mean, you gotta plant it out. And it takes extraordinary amounts of money. You're not gonna make as much money. You're not gonna get as much yield off the land. There's a lot involved. And you're trying to develop...

3:17:40What you're trying to do is mimic nature in a controlled environment. It's a lot to it. You have to have grazing land. You have to take the manure, you have to have chickens roaming around and pigs. And you have to move them. Yeah, there's like so many different things that have to happen. But the end result is natural and balanced. And it's actually carbon neutral. So that's what everybody wants. But most industrialized farms are horrible. You've ever seen those pig farms where they fly over and with drones and you see these lakes of shit and piss that they have where they just drain out from the bottom of the cage and see these fucking insane lakes of piss and shit.

3:18:21And this is something I dealt with when my dad was sick because he was in a bed for a long time and kept having to be on antibiotics and developed antibiotic resistance. And they say that when meat has all that antibiotics in it because they're waiting in their own shit and have to be on them that we're consuming antibiotics by the time you actually need them, they may not work. Crazy. Crazy. I mean... I gotta wrap this up with me. It's we were even don't... We were doing like three and a half hours. Like that. How long was it? I miss you. I miss you too. I mean... Yeah. Three and a half hours.

3:18:53Move here. Oh, dude. I'm trying. Come on, man. It's fun. I'm trying. It's the last place. I told you all the ways they're trying to keep us... I mean, all the ways they're trying to keep us now you've got to pay five percent of what you make if you sell your house in LA. You've got to pay it to the city of LA. Yeah. They're not letting us leave. That's so crazy. It's so crazy. But it might be overturned. It just still money. It's still... It's still criminal, dude. But I would honestly pay it at this point just to... Maybe get out. Yeah. Let's see. Once the kid's born, you're gonna want to get out.

3:19:21I think so too. Yeah, you're gonna want to get the fuck out of here and you come here and slice a piece full. All right. I'm on it. I love you, my friend. I love you so much. So it's good to see you. Thanks for having me. Tell everybody about your special. O -F -dot -tv -slash -witney. It's free. It's not only fans TV. It's called Mouthy. There it is. And I get all kinds of trouble. I really look like a... How pregnant were you here? This was... I was seven months pregnant. This was a month ago. It's all the FAD. There it is. Look at that. It's the store. Nice. I did it in the main room. Nice.

3:19:54I hear Fitzimmon's is shooting his special at the mother's show. Yes he is. Yeah, we're excited. Yeah, Brian Simpson shot us here. So cool. Duncan shot one here. Stan Hope shot one here. It makes no sense that we do like an away game every time we shoot a special. We shoot at some theater we've never been in before. It's true where it's fun. And also I just think comedy at a club is the greatest. It's about... For him and for him... It kills me. He did a special at the store and I was watching it with somebody who's not in the business and any capacity and he just went, why aren't all specials like this?

3:20:22Yeah. I feel like I'm in the crowd and I was like... Exactly. You feel like you're in the crowd. Everybody wants to show everybody they can sell out of China or even... That's what we do for other comics. Yeah. You feel like why am I looking at architecture? Well the industry wants you to do that too. Yeah. They want you to be in a giant place that looks beautiful. No one needs to see a crane shot in Goldleaf's architecture. That's what I'm saying. All right. Love you. Love you too. Bye everybody. See you.