#2087 - Ron White

24:59Yeah, but killing on the day is sweet. Yeah. You'll do it that way. I mean, what is life? What is life, if not enjoyment? It's all about love. Yeah. It's all about love. How much do you love? How much care you love? You know, outside of that nothing really means much, but. Yeah. But that's, you know, it's a waste of time or whatever I could do charity events with golf. People like to see me, you know, shake hands and I like doing that kind of stuff. So, you know, what you just love the game. I do love the game. You love talking about the game. Watch it. You know, it's because I play it. You know, it's like you and fighting, you know, exactly because you know exactly what that is that they're doing.

25:38You can't even hardly explain it to me. Even when you're trying to make me really understand what's going on exactly. When two guys are on the ground and it looks like nothing's happened and then you're losing your mind because there's so many things happening. That's a hard one to explain too because I'm trying to explain it while it's actually happening. So I have to have the path carved out in my head, like especially on like some transitions that guys do. When they go in mount to re -enact choke and I'm trying to like set up what he's going to do while not stepping on what they're doing. You know, and then it's like this weird dance with the description of what's happening in real time.

26:15Right. That's why nobody can ever take your job. A lot of guys can do that. Not true. Not that's not true. No, that's not true. If Rogan doesn't say it, it doesn't get sad. And that's true. That's how people feel. You know, they sit around waiting for you to tell them what to think and do. That's as far as fighting goes. No, there's this guys that are better at it than me. Like Dominic Cruz is better at it from a technical standpoint than me. You know, he's he's bad. He was a UFC champion. He said a shit ton of fights. He knows a lot about the technical details. Yeah, but he's not Joe Rogan. That was not as fun to hear.

26:53Yeah, for me, the fun, I get it, but for me, the fun is the fight. The fun is the, you know, the who the fun knows what's going to happen. You can tell that. You can see the joy in your face that it brings you with all these fucking events. Well, you're getting to see the literally the greatest fist fighters of all time. The greatest stand up ground fighting MMA fighting warriors of all time. They exist right now. Now I get excited and I get that and I get that it's the ultimate sport. Okay, I'll fight you. You know, that's how wars should be decided. One guy and one guy. Instead of we're going to take our lower middle class, put them in a field with your lower middle class.

27:36They're going to kill each other. Yeah. Now you ought to just fight me in the fucking alley. That's too difficult, wrong wife. So they'd rather just fight you with narratives. Right. Fight you with mandates. But you know me, I won't listen to their narratives. Yeah. That's how I defend myself. I'm really careful about what information I let in my head. Because I don't know what's going to stew around in there. I hear you, man. I hear you, especially in this day and age. And also there's like, there's so much to worry about every fucking time I get on the news. And I start reading what's happening in the world every day.

28:10It's something new that's insane that you have to worry about. I know. And that's why I'm just real careful about what news I let in my head. Yeah. And I've got news feeds on my phone that are these are news organizations that I trust that if something wacko in the world's going to happen, it's news and they're going to pick it up. And but if it's something completely unverifiable that I don't even need to fucking know, they're not going to pick it up. And so, but if I know when people go down that fucking dark road in the web, they come out on the other side and sometimes they're, you can't get them back.

28:47You know, they're full blown. I got friends. When I came back full blown cueing on, they believed it. Satan, they're Satan worshiping cabal of Democrats that eat babies. I'm like, we're all the missing babies. You know, how many babies does it take to feed all the Democrats? If they're all drinking the blood of the babies, they're going to be some missing babies right somewhere. No, no, there's a, they're from overseas. They got some answers to anything you throw at them. Tom Hanks is like, that's not true. Tom Hanks still making movies. Tom Hanks didn't eat a baby. Yeah, he did. And they believe it.

29:22Where at the time? They believe it. They believe it. I don't know. You're down in comfort. It just straight out of cueing on. It was there basic doctrine in the beginning was all this bizarre claims. And I got a friend that said, well, you matter. And I'm not going to say her name, but it's, I mean, she believes this with all of her heart. Right. All of her heart. And there's nothing I can do to, to, to say, you know, nothing I can do. I think at least a certain portion of that is other governments fucking with people. Absolutely. Absolutely. It is. It is. Yeah. And you can sway the uninformed, they're not uninformed.

30:10They're misinformed. Yeah. They're informed, you know, they're taking in information, but, but, but it's just the wrong information. And you can be easily manipulated by that kind of stuff. I mean, the human nature wants to go where it finds comfort, you know. Yeah. And if somebody's beating you what you eat, you'll go that way, you know, even if it's not good for him. And people have a very strong desire to, like, uncover mysteries. Right. You know, very strong desire to get to the truth. Yeah. Because in an, in an important situation, like, there's something real going on. That's a, that's a good quality.

30:43It's a good quality to have. But if it's, you know, they're eating babies. It's like, okay. Right. What, what's the benefit eating babies? Like, why are they doing this? I mean, it gives them some kind of superpower, you know, it's so bizarre and so off of any, what I would consider, realm of possibility. And even part of it being true. But, you know, people go down there and they'll see just a path of things that lead them, you know, some of it true, some of it not true, not true, not true, not true. And they'll head off down that direction. They don't come back, you know. They're, you know, it can separate families, man.

31:19You know, they don't talk to grandpa anymore. He's gone off the fucking deep end. And you know what's really insidious about that? Is that the more crazy ones that are out there and the more people start linking them all together, the more real conspiracy sneak through. Because if you're, if you wanted to hide a real conspiracy, I would hide it in a bunch of other bullshit conspiracies. I put a bunch of bullshit ones out there. Sure. And I'd make it so that morons believe that Michelle Obama has a dick. I would just pump it out everywhere. I'd make fake videos. And that's what, you know, exactly what's going on.

31:57That's what's going on. And if you did that though, then you could sneak in some real conspiracies. And that otherwise people would think, well, that's outrageous. That kind of corruption would be uncovered. Right. That kind of corruption would be prosecuted. And you're like, wait, no one's going to anybody's getting busted for this? Right. What? Right. Nobody is. Right. So it's not really happening. It's bananas. And also people want to, you know, I know somebody that has no formal education. Right. I don't have any formal education. I didn't make it through high school. My favorite joke that I ever wrote was I do have a GED.

32:33And if you don't know what GED stands for, you've probably got one too. And one of my favorite jokes. But, you know, they would love to have the answer to a question. You know, they would love to be able to make a point of some kind. You know, they would love to, but they can't because they're, you know, they're just sitting around watching other people do it. And I always wish I could think of something as I can't think of anything. Well, if there's somebody feeding them something to say, now they get real loud about it. Right. Because they have a point to make, even though they don't understand it at all, they just know how to sound like they're making a point like Lauren Bobert or, you know, or Marjorie Taylor Green or whoever.

33:12That's who they were. And now they feel like they can make a point. So they're real fucking loud about it. And, but if you've actually been around a while, you just sit around and shake your head and go, you're a goddamn idiot. But all you got to do is be the smartest person in your region. And boom, you're in Congress, you know. They think she's smartest fuck down there and spat one little section of George or where Marjorie Taylor's out of. It's the problem with it is like how many people that you know want to run the government. How many people do you know? How many, I mean, how many people that you know that are like really healthy, clear thinking, business -minded people that have been successful, that want to run the government.

33:56No fucking nobody. So you're not getting any of those folks. No, you're not. What you're going to get is you're going to get their money to influence things in the direction they'd like to see it go without them having to be there doing day -to -day stuff on it. So they can't have influence on it, but they don't want it. They don't do they want to be the president of the United States. Do they have it set up like a minor league? Like they groom politicians, they get them to a position and like I like how you stand on this. But maybe if you stood a little bit further on this line, we could support you.

34:27Oh, I'm so lute. And then they start grooming them. We're running for the big stage just like you would do with like regional plays and also in your own Broadway. Right. Well, you know, that's the religious right. You know, they're, you know, they wanted, they wanted somebody, they wanted to get rid of a borscht and so what are they going to do? They got to stack those courts. They're going to do you're going to, okay, we got, there's a trillion of us. And we'll put you in office and we'll be, but you got to, you got to put this judge here and this judge there. So what are things comes to pass?

34:55So that's just the way it works. I'm even more cynical. I just can't believe that human beings as a whole haven't resolved a bunch of different things. There's a, there's a bunch. I don't believe a really coming back around. I think people are making this argument that they're coming back around and they're highlighting moments where it's coming back around. Coming back around to what? I just don't, I just, I mean, I think this is one of the weirdest times ever for human beings to communicate. And I think because there's so many of us and there's so many people that are talking and there's so many voices and it's happening on everyone's phone and it's happening all over the fucking world, all at once.

35:46Never been like this ever ever in the history and it makes you wonder where it's going. I think it's short circling everything. That is too. It's short circling our government, it's short circling. It makes me nervous. And one of the things that makes me nervous is this government that we have, it's complicated. It is complicated. So you just can't be some douchebag on the side going, oh, I want a model there. You got to have a plan because this thing's got to work. You, you want, you don't want Jeff separation of church and state. Well, why don't you just move to Iran then because that's what happened over there.

36:17The religious right took over. Now, our laws are your laws. That used to be a pretty normal place. People don't believe that. But Iran used to be fucking strawberry rivers and shit and normal people with jobs and... Ron, there were people that were willing to laugh at people's deaths because they didn't want to get vaccinated for COVID. There were people like that at the same time thinking they're good people. Yeah. Fall on the internet. I know. I know, you know, when it came to all that stuff, you know me, I don't talk about politics on stage. And I never, I never knew and I never will. And it's not, you know, you just want to be able to sell tickets to both people.

36:58But no, I want stand -up comedy to be a place where we can laugh. And I'm going to do what I, you know, so I'm not going to take a position. I never did. If I was a political commentator before, okay, that's fine. If I'm not Bill Mar. So I don't bring it into my show because I want us all to come in and just be able to fucking laugh together. And find out how much that matters. And at the end of my show's now, I'm reminding people that no matter what our differences are, we just still came to this room. And we all laughed at the same thing and we laughed hard and we loved each other. And we had a great experience.

37:28Let's remember that. Let's try to get back to that. Right. You know, instead of all these stupid little things that makes it look like we have, it's like fake rivalries almost. It's like, it's not like, you know, Texas and Oklahoma, you look, they're that same place. Exactly. There's no difference between those two places and they act like well, world, Oklahoma, you're not worth it. And somebody put that in their head, you know, and what I was getting now was that if they're willing to do that over just some issue of whether you want to or don't want to get a vaccine, what would they do if they really believe that God was on their side?

38:04What would they do in a really bad, they could really when things go really bad. Anything when the power goes out for a while. Anything they could. Yeah. And justify it. And that's what's dangerous is they genuinely do believe that we would be better off if we did things like this for sure under these laws of God in this book. And I wouldn't Jesus would get back to his basic teachings that I'd really dug, you know, which is love each other. Love, love, love. And wait a minute, that was linen. But still Jesus was saying this similar song about, you know, and with a good positive message and that message was always of love.

38:48Yeah. Back when I went to church and, you know, my uncle still preached it this day. Dr. Charles Pollard is still preaching to the American Indians out in Farmington, New Mexico for no money, you know, has 23 people about it every service. And then he goes to jails and and he's 90 years old, you know, still working to this day. Wow. Knocking it out for the Lord. And he used to be the president of the Southern Baptist Convention. My uncle did. So that was very powerful position. And then he fell out of favor with him because he just didn't believe in some of the doctrine. And then he started, he showed up in my grandmother's birthday party on a Harley with no shirt on.

39:29I'm like, oh no, a jockele Charlie's gone nuts. So he went down the Corbis. I think it was and he started this kind of gospel according to Charlie thing. And then he has just kind of a phase he went through and then he, you know, but now he's still believes in that basic doctrine. And I love him to death. He's one of my favorite people. I'll talk to him all day long, you know, I just, he's a treasure. It really is. And it's just a sweetheart of a guy about all about, you know, love and sweetness. That's awesome. His wife died and I asked him, I said, did your knowledge of God and Jesus and did that help you with her death?

40:15And he goes, nope, not a bit. It hurt and it hurt and I hated and I didn't understand it. I was like everybody else, you know, didn't even help. So now, but that's just how honest it is. Wow. Oh, go Charlie. Fascinating. How much religions practiced by so many different people in so many different ways. And yet if someone tried to start a new one right now, good fucking luck. Good luck. The, the, the feds would investigate you immediately. If you start, if you start your own religion, if you bought some land out in Bastrop, right? And the, the Ron White church. You're already thinking about doing this aren't you?

40:57You're just putting my name on it. I know what you're doing. I'm not interested in any of those activities. I'm not either. But if you did, I would get my uncle to come around it. They would, but you would 100 % get investigated. Oh, yeah, would. But if you wanted to open up a Catholic church, if you said you converted to Catholicism, you wanted to open up Ron White's Catholic church. Right. So you'd be like, oh, with a mission and a respectable position to take. Ron, good, good for you. Congratulations on converting. Sorry to get new money. It is. Yeah, you can't start up. You can't have it be a startup in the religion world.

41:27I think they just got to be a book to a brand of sub -sort. You have to be in business with the big guys. You can't, I mean, like Scientology, that's, you could, you can get wild and go with them or, you know, Mormons. You can get wild, go with them. But if you just want to let go, like, straight Christian, you're like a very acceptable pathway. Yeah, you, and you, and I can get along with you. If you're Scientology, that one's really hard for me to swallow, but it, it, it, it's just difficult. Let me ask you this, like, what are the standards? Like, say if you wanted to start a church, like if you were legitimately committed to the Bible and you became like a Bible scholar.

42:08But all you really done is write science fiction novels. No, no, no, no, that's, that's, that's that guy. That's the Scientology guy. But I'm saying if you wanted to start a church, like a church, a Christian church, what would be the requirements? If you just say, you know, I've been studying the Bible for 10 years, I want to teach at a church. Could you just open up a church? How's that work? I don't, but you, you're asking me this, like, I've done it, but I'm trying to get you to do it. That's the next thing I've done. Yeah, I know what you're up to. That's how you manipulate people, Joe. That's how they built his empire, by the way.

42:42You look like a Jesus type figure. What are the requirements, Jamie? If you wanted to start a church of Jamie. Perfect question for Chad G .P .T. F .I. Yes. Chad G .P .T. and Eric Twelkstepp. 12 steps. Determine your purpose and beliefs. Clearly define the purpose and beliefs of your church. This includes your mission, vision, and core doctrine. Okay. Two, legal structure. Choose a legal structure for your church. Options may include becoming a non -profit organization, establishing a religious corporation, or forming a religious association. Consult legal experts to determine the best structure for your situation.

43:15Name. Okay. So it seems like you just have to get a legal thing. You know, like you would like some sort of an LLC or something. Yeah. What do you want to, what you want is the tax exempt status. And the rest of it doesn't really matter. Get that tax exempt status. Then you can start hoarding wealth. Yeah. In the name of Jesus Christ of the latter day's saints or whatever. And you can hold all these billions of dollars in real estate holdings all under that tax exempt status. If they start, you know the, this is the only thing that gets me going. Is big church, big church. We need to tax big church.

43:49And those pastors and those mega churches, they need to be looked at under the biggest brightest light you can look at. Joe Olstein, fuck you, Olstein. I tried. He said it right here first. Now the mattress makes a much better, to me. If you want an example of how Christ wanted us to live, it would be mattress max and not Joe Olstein. I don't know who mattress max is. Well, he's the guy that bent some 10 million bucks on the, on the Astros every year and wins. This is how you got famous. That's mattress max right there. He, during the big floods in Houston, just a few years ago, when there are two things that happen.

44:35Mattress max, people were literally dying in the street. Mattress max on this huge furniture stores. Come up here. He opened them up, sleep on them couches. I don't care. And I'll find a way to make food for you guys. And I mean, people bringing hot dogs and shit down there, making everybody food, slept. Just make sure you're comfortable. Make sure you're safe. And, and look at it. This is it. All these people over at mattress max is furniture store. He brought in everybody he could. But Joe Olstein wouldn't even let him in the door because they just had the carpets redone. It is cathedral church.

45:09And he didn't want people to track and shit in there. Didn't he eventually give in though and let people stay there? I don't think so. I thought he did. Well, if he did it for the wrong reason, right? Mattress max did that for the right reason. These people needed to get in out of the cold and wet and whatever. There he is. There he is. He defended not opening liquid kitchen Houston to Harvey victims. He defended it. Yeah. Yeah, because of that carpet was just cleaned and look at him. Well, that's so crazy. Yeah. First of all, look at him. You see, you see. It's, it's, it's so obvious. Like doing something that is so obvious.

45:50You have a private jet that's, it's so obvious. You have a mansion. It's so obvious. How much does that watch? This is so obvious. What are you doing? He's so obvious. This is not. You did eventually. You were correct. Wait, wait, wait, do you see the even weeks after that post? The super duper rich church guy. It's a fucking crazy thing. I know. And I know that I could do it. I could totally do it. That would be my calling. That's what I'm saying. You should do it. And I mean, I should do it. Yes. Listen, if you do it while joining, we all get the tax free something. We'll work something out.

46:26Right. And it'll just be us. That's what we got. We're the great fucking. Can we bring the 11 million people that listen to your show under? Yeah, we'll give them. Under one umbrella. Come on, guys. Come on, get behind this. We don't even know what it is yet, but we're going to let you know. That's the thing you can never do today. Like, imagine trying to start a new country today. Fuck you. We would never let you. No, never. No, we'd thumb you. Yeah, get the fuck out of here. Yeah. It's like, just like you trying to start a new religion. Uh -uh. Nope. Nope. No new countries, no new religions.

46:58We're not here in it. Religions have to be old as fuck, so they might be true. Right. Or at least have some kind of connections with some really ancient text. Yeah. Or the Scientology one, they just threatened to sue. That was a genius move. What they did was amazing. They threatened thousands of lawsuits. Everyone was going to file a lawsuit. They're all lawyers. Same with those fucking Latter -day Saints guys. Those are, you got a bunch of lawyers. You got to give it up to them. That's pretty ball. Yeah. They're ballsy. Yeah. And you're selling a something that's not easy to sell. You know, they got a, that story.

47:38I mean, none of it is. You know, the, the, the stories I believed. Well, that's why I wrote that beautiful joke that didn't work the other day. And, uh, about the Christians and the Lyles and, uh, let me break that down for your listeners. Uh, because I'm writing, apparently I'm writing my worst stuff right now. Because I'm not going to write stuff that nobody will laugh at out of 250 people, 250 people don't lie. I'm not. And, uh, but when I was a kid, I was raised in the Baptist church. I don't call Charlie my preacher when I was little. And, uh, so, but there was a story book. Wasn't the Bible, but it was just something we got in Sunday school or in a depicted Christians being fed to the Lyles, which always stuck in my craw that that was a big story, a big deal.

48:19I mean, you know, I don't know. I know we've all been oppressed, but feeding them to the Lyles. That's pretty big deal. And I really thought it was universal knowledge. So when they were looking for a new name for the Washington commanders, I suggested the Christians. Because when, and, and I thought about this joke for three days. And I thought about the buildup of laughter it was going to get. It was going to work so well. And they were going to end up changing the name of the comedy club to run white mothership. Because of this one joke and that well it worked. But the way that it was going to start, the rumble was going to start as I was going to say when, when Detroit comes to town, they're going to make the connections of Detroit lines, lines, Christians, my story book from my childhood.

48:56And that's the rumble of the really hip laughter. And because when the Lyles get back to the, that's the next lap was going to be. When the Lyles meet the Christians on a Cleveland playing field work, you know, so. None of it got a laugh and none of it, none of it worked. And they were stared at me and they were as a good crowd too. They were waiting for the next funny thing that I said. And, and that was it. And I really was expecting it. And it just, I was never been so wrong about it. Do you think you are just old enough to where you're like over that curve where the Christians and the Lions were more recent than they were?

49:32Yeah, I just don't think everybody got that story book. Nobody gets that anymore. No, I didn't. Well, obviously, I got it. I got Christians and Lions. Yeah. I got that connection. I don't think kids get that. But you said you would have told me not to do it, which was Lyme because you would have told me to do it because you want me to try new shit. I always wanted to do it. But I just, I was joking around. You said don't over the touch not to do it. No, you would have told me to do it. And you would have been wrong. But you told me a bomb that before I ever found out about it. I did. And I said, I was so bad.

49:58It's so laughably. I laughed so hard. And how wrong I was. That's how little I was. That's how you fuck around. I know. And that's the truth. That's how you, I mean, bits are fascinating. They changed, they changed their structure like on stage. I could do five minutes now on why that joke didn't work. Yep. And that would be way more entertaining than the joke ever was, you know. Show up Tuesday. Did I was watching a video today of this Lion gone wrong situation into a circus? Woof! Oh my God. These people, this lion attacked this dude and they're hitting it with a hose. I mean, this guy's getting fucked up by this lion.

50:38And they're spraying it with a hose to get it off. That's how they get it off of the water hose. And he gets away and then a lion gets him again. And the lion gets him again and their water hose didn't. And they're beaming it. You got footage of this? Yeah, there's footage of it. It looks like it's Russian. If you don't find a Jamie, I don't have 99 % sure I saved it on my phone because it's so fucked up. But I'd have to go through it and that would be some dead air. Russian hose. I forget who sent it to me. You don't edit these things, do you? No, I got it. The podcast? No. I want it to be like this.

51:11Right, right, right. Yeah, I like a little dead air. This is it. So something happens. Oh, it's a circus thing. Yeah. Something happens. This lion just decides, e -fucking -duff. Woo. I mean, this thing just jacks it's too. Yeah, well, that's what happened to, you know. I see their sprain on with the hose to try to get them off. And this guy got fucked up. I mean, he got fucked up by those lions. That is so scary. Yeah. They have a thing like that bite you. Right. What are you doing in there? Are you fucking crazy? I put it in the ring. I put it in the ring. Zigg feeding Roy. Zigg feeding Roy.

51:44I can't see a feed in Roy. That happened in that room that I played at the garage. That was that was their room. Man, that's where that whole thing went down. Yeah, it dragged him off. Bit him by the neck and dragged him off. And from a live audience. There's all the speculation to why it did it. All the spec, no one knows. Right. No one knows. It just decided I'm gonna bite this guy's neck and drag him off. There was a thought that it was afraid of some woman had feathers on her hat in the audience. And that it threw him off. I mean, if you really think that fucking tiger is a scared of a lady with feathers on her head, that doesn't make any sense.

52:23Yeah, I think it just decided to bite that guy's neck. But I'm not a tiger. Maybe that guy would have been a prick. You know, under the guise of being an animal lover, but at night he was like going, don't give him that expensive food and, you know, Well, maybe it was a black sheep. It was probably punishment. It's probably what they do to the tigers to get them to listen. Right. You know, like, what did they do when they were training them? You know, did they ever cross the line with the tiger always remember the time you heard it? Right. And then he lashes out at you. Yeah, I'm going to find a fucking opportunity.

52:53I'm going to sit here. Yeah, you'd think the tigers on them is going to be served cold. Maybe it's going to be served cold. It seemed like for the most part they got along with those tigers for a long time, though. That's what's worth it. They lived at their house. Right. Yeah. The sick reading Roy, they lived at their house. They were at one with them. They fucking cuddle them and loved on them. And they do say that tigers when they protect their cubs, that's how they do it. They grab them by the neck and they drag them off. But he's just too frail for it to do that too. It just fucked him up.

53:21Yeah, right. No, and those were big men, big strong men. These guys were weight lifters and certain people, but nothing compared to that. You're right. You're not like a cub. Oh, no. The way a lion picks up the cub, it has all the skins or grabs all that extra skin. You don't have any skin to stretch your fucking neck. Yeah, it's all vital organs. It's all skin. It was ashamed that he lived a long time. It is a crippled person. Well, he did. He lived several years, right? It was just a horrible story, man, and that the show was shut down. Because that's the reality of having tigers on a stage in front of a bunch of people.

54:03You just don't know. It's just for one reason or another. Some crazy person could stand up and freak out and yell. Right. And the thing could just launch itself out. Is this it? The question is, don't you show it to me, son of a bitch? I've been trying to find it. I don't know. What could go wrong? Everything. You got to ask yourself that question. What could go wrong? Because that might always it's what he was saying. Something about his diminishing relationship with that lion. This is so tired of four or five years ago. I was trying to see if it had an answer to all the questions you guys are asking.

54:34But it said something about his diminishing relationship with it. Yeah. Oh, I got he wrote it. Like a horse speculation on from someone they asked on this. Yeah, like an ex -employee or something. I think I saw that. Oh, so good though. Oh, and the tiger and him were not getting along. That's again, it's his speculation. This says new allegations about the attack, which is what have been like 15 years after the attack. Dude, almost nothing scares me more than animals. Right? Don't scare to them. That's why you go out of your way to kill him when you can. Well, those are not scared of those. Although you should be.

55:07Bores don't you hunt bored? Yeah, those things can kill you, Joe. They definitely can. Yeah. They can. Yeah. I'm thinking of Elfmore. The the the board thing in Texas is fucking bananas. I just love it when they catch them all in them cages. And then what do they do? Can you eat them? Is it just pig meat, right? Yeah, it's just pork. It's really good. You make really good bacon and shit out of it. Well, why are there any homeless hungry people? It's good. We got those wild boar all over the place. Wild boar are very good. Very good. There's a guy in town, Jesse Griffiths, he owns a Dieduea restaurant.

55:43And he's like a real wild game cooking expert in amazing chef. Yeah. And he has wild boar dishes at his, but even teaches people at a hunt wild boars, cook them, and how to hunt them down, how to fire rifle the whole deal. Takes all the whole thing but your own. You can't even shit them into their commotion. Fuck with me. He's like, they're delicious. Fuck with me. But it's also it's it's a it's a not just a renewable resource, but you really, we have an obligation to kill them. There's too many. Yeah, they're they're fucking up land and oh, there's an insane, there's millions and millions of them in Texas.

56:18Yeah. And they keep, they have babies three times a year sometimes. They can have babies when they're six months old. Can I tell you a story about a frog? Yeah. I lived on the lake, like I'll be Jay in this house and there was a frog, big bull frog. And he was lived by my pier and I would go out there and I would see him and you'd always jump in the water. And but he was that's where he lived. He was always a big old fat thing to that this big, biggest bull frog I'd seen. And I'd go down there and fish and then I'd come back there and then one night he didn't jump. He stayed there and I'm like, oh, he's not afraid of me anymore.

56:52The next night I brought a net down and I caught him and I killed him and ate him. And I shit him into my toilet. And the other frogs went out and told other frogs don't go near there because that's what's going on. He's just waiting for you to be still and he's going to kill you and eat you and shit you into his toilet. I think they've figured that out. I think they did. I didn't see any more frogs after that, after the missing of that one frog. Yeah, I bet if you started feeding them, they'd be hanging around. But if you start killing them. Yeah, right. They're probably right. They're going to catch on.

57:27Do you think they do a roll call? I try to figure out where everybody is? Because some animals do that. Do they really? Yeah, maybe that's what frogs are doing. When they're quick. Or quick, quick, quick, quick, quick. Uh oh, where's Toby? Yeah, what are they doing when they're doing those noises? Those noises are cool as fuck, by the way. If you ever buy a lake at night and hear frogs making noises? Oh, it's so cool. I hate them. Really? We had those little frogs. I know I lived in Atlanta. You know what we did? We would go there was a little frog with a mouth that big on a little frog barely that big, making this big old loud noise and bugging shit out of me.

57:57And you could either easily catch because it was a flashlight because they don't know that you can see them. You know, and they're making all that racket. You can just pick them up, put them in a can. And then we would take them. This guy didn't like had a pond right behind him, and we'd go dump them all over there. And he's like, I don't frogs around here. Get fucking all over it, make it all right. Yeah, I don't know. Not over at my house or not. Yeah, that's that one of those little... This is night music, Ron. Uh, this is the ones we had. We had ones where... BAH! We just need to put together a better band.

58:29Yeah. Well, they're gonna put that band together over that pond behind that guys house. You know, the thing that... That's where they all live now. The thing about frogs, like... They're very predatory. Like, frogs, you've ever seen frogs in like a cage with mice. It's one of the most disturbing things you've ever seen in your life. No, I've never seen that. This is giant Asian frog. I had it on my Instagram. It's on YouTube. This is giant... Some kind of Asian frog. That one, the second one down. This... The yellow, where he's yellow. Watch this one. This one is fucking insane. This frog's insane.

59:03So they put these little rats. I can't tell if they're nice or rats. More. Those are mice, right? Yeah. Mice. They look like mice. Okay, so they put these mice in this fucking... No, those are rats, man. Those are little rats. Yeah, those are rats. Yeah, okay. And then they put this giant frog in there with them. And I don't know why they're trying to jump and get out and all of a sudden the frog just decided to start eating them. I think... I think they're trying to just try to get out. Look what he does. He's a monster. This is like a Star Wars monster. Oh my God. Oh, dude. He's in a job on the hunt.

59:39Yeah, exactly. He eats them all. This one's not effective. I've seen it. I think he's probably already full. They probably... Look how fatty he is. They probably filmed these all day long. How cruel. But he's... He's anybody... The one that I saw, he is a monster. Is it anything he's trying to put a stop to this? Nobody's putting a stop to this. Nobody cares about the rats. They're the frogs. They're the frogs. The rats or frogs. Getting over respect. We'll make that part of our religion. Isn't it funny though? If the rat was eating the frog I'd be more disturbed. Oh my God. Look at that gross that thing.

1:00:13Yeah. Look at it. Look at how big it is. I've never seen a frog shape like that. Oh. Look at it. Slow motion. Yeah, come on over here. Yeah, let me tell you something. I've got a little story for you. It seemed like the rat ran right in there. Like fuck it. Let's get this over with. Oh my God. What a way to die. You're born hanging on the chin of a thing that's swallowing you. Look at this little ball. Oh. Oh, the last dying quiver. Oh, bro. He's going to stay alive inside of things. Don't do that. Don't let your children watch this. This is really, really... So disturbing. Yeah. I'm trying to unsee it and I can't do it.

1:00:53I can't do it. That's what happens. That's nature, man. That's part of the Joe Rogan experience right there. That's nature. That's why you should know. Rock and Isles in the street. That's why you shouldn't import wolves into your neighborhood. That's right. That's why you shouldn't bring grizzly bears back to California. Slow down, everybody. My mother wants to... You know how low things got with mom. Now I want a cat. No, mother. You can't have a cat. Genies allergic to cats. No, I want one of those bangle cats. They're a high foe allergene. Oh my God. For my mother and my nanny. That's one.

1:01:28That's one. And yeah, I think they're pretty good sized cats, like 15, 20 pounds. And I'm like, no. She's like, I want you to get me a bangle cat for my nanny. It's birthday. And I said, mother, number one, I'm not advancing you anymore. Birthdays, you got to show me the number. You got to get to the number before you get your nanny. I'm not fronting you any nanny. You're birthday. You have to get to that number to get that present. Because you already got them. You're already advanced all you can. So if she lives to be 90, she might get a... Wow. It's just a few months away. No, aren't... Am I thinking of the same kind of cat?

1:02:03Which ones are bangle? It's a horrible idea. There's some of them that are... They're basically like a wild cat. Yeah, well, they're not very many generations removed, I think, is the problem. And I think they're perfectly good cats, but they're really big and they're really a lot of energy. I'm taking them... I'm taking them... I'm taking them... I'm taking them out on a leash and stuff. And mother doesn't want to do that. I'm like, take it out. A leash, what? Or something. A little lap dog. I think... Am I fucking this up? Is it the same thing? Is it a bangle? The same thing as those other ones that...

1:02:33No, I think they're called bangle kittens, you know? Yeah, that's it right there. It's a regular bangle cat. Yeah, so that's a regular cat. So I'm thinking of that. I'm thinking of a serval. Oh, yeah, no. Okay. So what is a bangle cat just a cat, right? Is that just a cat? Yeah, but it comes from the bangle tiger. And they're just a handful. It's not like a big ol' floppy lap cat. These cats, they're big time killers. They've got to be involved in stuff. They've got a lot of energy. They're big and strong. So they're up to like, you know, 15, 20 pounds, I think. Look at the description. The bangle cat is domesticated cat breed created from a hybrid of the Asian leopard cat with domestic cats, especially the spotted Egyptian mow.

1:03:23So that... Yeah, there you go. I was in my hand, I was like, I think I fucked up and it's the wrong one. That one is crazy. I've seen people have that one as a pet. You have? Yeah, yeah. Did John Jones have one of those as a pet? That's a lion. Didn't he have a crazy cat? He's got one of these. What does he have? Oh, yeah. What kind of that? That looks like that bangle cat. Yeah, it does look more like that than the cerebral cat. It says, cerebral though, doesn't it? I typed that in. I don't, I was... Oh. What kind of fucking cat is that? Is that a jacket on? Yeah, it's got like a fucking leash.

1:03:57That's a big ass cat. Bro, I would not... Donald, careful Donald. Mother's 90, that's not what she wants. And she gets so stubborn. It could be awesome. I want a cat. It could be awesome. It could be the greatest cat of all time. Or it could be... It decides to fuck you up and win it in. You know, she couldn't defend herself. If it went nuts on her. That's what our story was earlier today in the episode. People getting eaten by tigers. First responders when they find bodies after people have died in a house with cats. Doesn't take long for the cats to eat. They don't give you a whole lot of time for the story.

1:04:37Oh mama. Dogs away. They will. Yeah, dogs away until they're starving to death. They're dying. They don't even associate you with you anymore. You just meet and they have to stay alive. Right. Cats are like, I'm hungry. Yeah. We're gonna eat Ron's lips. Right. Can an eyeball and nostril. It's a fascinating relationship that we have to... These small animals, like I was saying about your beautiful dog, that you... If you trace the lineage back of that thing, that used to be a wolf. Somehow or another, they went from wolves to like more of a floppy ear to animal, to more of an animal that was like smaller, that hung...

1:05:17And then they figured out how to... All the way to a rug that's shit. That's what I own. That's a rug that's shit. Like how the fuck did they do that? So if you die in a home that's locked with animals, those animals will eat you really fast, especially a cat. Dogs will hold out until they have nothing left to eat. But a cat will remove your head in 24 hours. Oh my god. Oh my god. Loyalty, they got over all that love quick. That cat never loved you. Oh my god. If they can eat your head in 24 hours, that cat never loved you. It was just... I need food. I'm gonna be nice. Oh, I had a corner on it.

1:05:49I was on the ground. Waiting for you to fucking die. I can explain it to them. Oh, the corner was telling them? Yeah. I think, yes, and like what kind of fucked up should I be seeing? He's like animals. Well, did you play that? Play that. Right, where you saying that? Over and remove your head within 24 hours. Right before the head. And... Back it up before that. Back it up before that. Well, so if you die in a home that's locked with animals, those animals will eat you really fast, especially a cat. Dogs will hold out until they have nothing left to eat. But a cat will remove your head in 24 hours.

1:06:21And I'm not talking... I'm talking literally hair on the floor, no head, and nibbling into their chest. Even cats that were loved by their owners, or is it just cats that... No, if you think we're had something with the owner and they're gonna say this is my town. Yeah, no, they're absolutely feeding on you. I don't care how much you love that cat, and that cat loves you, he's gonna eat you. And I just never imagined that they could do that much damage. Smaller dogs. Now a lab won't. A lab's for some reason don't eat their owners, you know. Unless they're locked in for months, I guess they would.

1:06:57But I find it more winy dogs, small dogs, and cats. Cats, they don't wait. And how do you help me now? I don't know. I don't know if I believe the guy now. Why? Because I bet he has a lab, so he had to say labs wouldn't eat you. I mean, what makes a lab different than my sweet little Matty? He's saying Matty would go after you after a little while, but the lab, come on. Yeah, why would they think that the... Maybe he means like Chihuah was or something like that. Like, or a little Jack Russell Terrier's, they'll fuck you up quick. But like, what's the data on that? The labs really eat you when you're done?

1:07:35I think he's done off of his experience. I don't know. I was trying to... I don't know where he gets his expertise. Yeah. I'm not seeing this on NPR. This is not coming on on my news feed. That's why I was also kind of making that point. When I googled that and typed it in, it gives me like a TikTok fun fact. Like, that's the fact that Google gave me, which was a fact from Theo's podcast. That's like the top result. And when they're calling it a fact? I mean, well, I do know for a fact that cats eat people. Yeah. Yeah, that's what it makes sense. I mean, people eat people. I know people who have found people that where they got, you know, where they got cops, where they found people that were partially eaten by the cats.

1:08:10That's 100 % real. That was a fun show. That show for the cops was awesome. That was so much fun. That was awesome. Three cops got thrown out. That's right. They came to party, folks. They came to have a good day. They took the party. They had a lot of fun. That was a good fucking time. Those people don't get appreciated enough. No, it's a truth. They don't get appreciated enough. And if things go south, they're going to be the first people you call. And you've been disrespecting them for so long. And not appreciating how hard it is what they do for so fucking long. And that doesn't excuse the bad ones.

1:08:46That's not the point. No, it doesn't. It's just you can't lump everybody in with that same group. Because most of them are great. You've got to have these guys. You have to have them. You have to have them. You have to have them. And they're the greatest job in the goddamn world. And they're sure as dangerous. And some of them drive on that kind of environment. And that's great. I don't. And so I need, you know, it was just it was so cool to be able to make them laugh that hard. Because we had the death of that cop not too long ago. That's been a pretty duller place to work. That's what the guy was telling me.

1:09:16The chief police was like, they hadn't been laughing. You know, they haven't been that's really got everybody down and kept them down. Of course. So that was cool. That was so much fun. Yeah, it was fun. It was real fun to do. Yeah, it's it's you know, we should have started a church that night. We could have started. We'd have planned these seeds carefully. And this is what we're doing today on the podcast. We're planting seeds. You can't just go out there and just dig a trench. And the government starts getting involved quickly. You got to like slowly plant seeds. Based on a story of love. Yeah.

1:09:51And mutual respect. It would be great if we could buy into a franchise like Chick -fil -A. You know, or something, you know what I mean? Close up. Just buy into something. It's pre -existing. You know, the whole challenge is going to be started from scratch. Yeah, just the church of Ron White just from scratch. It's going to be on their last curtain. No, dude, it's a job for Joe Rogan, Ron White Church. I ain't doing this by myself, man. But it's kind of funny. It really is kind of funny that if we did just both of us become Christian and then open up a Christian church, no problems at all. You know, I got like three million followers.

1:10:28I wonder how far they would actually follow. If I started leading, I mean. You don't even want three million. If you get 300 ,000 to move into a town that you've created in the middle of desert. Right. Right. I mean, it's that Portland movie that the Netflix series, Wild Wild Country. They literally bought into a town. And it wasn't that bad. I think it was you that said that. They always sound pretty good. You know, like I can do this. Yeah. You know, then it gets sorry. Nobody can handle that kind of power. Yeah, that's what it's like. And that kind of focus of energy. And we, yeah, you're the guy.

1:11:04You're the guy without corrupt. Well, it's just corrupt. They're there, but it's literally bestowing the word of God. And the meaning of life and the meaning of the universe in front of their loyal following. Right. This guy's got 31 Rolls Royces, by the way. Yeah. And they're just happy when he gets another one. He was funny though. He was the funny one. Oh, yeah. He was. He was, you know, I would have listened for a while, you know. You ever hear that thing, that famous thing that he said about democracy? You remember? It's by people, but the people are retarded. So it is. So you get this fucking guru.

1:11:45You got this guru. Tell, saying that everyone's retarded. Right. You got to see this. This was the dude. This was the fucking dude. Because democracy basically means.

1:12:08Government by the people of the people. And he works slower than I do. He does, but it's good. I've listened to you. Yes, they are. Yes, they are. No, he goes on even further. This is a small version of it. He continues on. This is the government of the retarded. Oh, for the retarded. He goes into this whole thing. And this is the guru that was running that town up there. That was the guy. And he was the guy with 31 Rolls Royces, right? Yeah, he was balling out of control. Yeah, he was balling out of control. He was balling out of control. He was going nuts. He probably would have pulled it off.

1:12:47He wasn't for Sheila. Yeah. She was so ruthless. Right. She's terrifying. She's the one that got the guns out. She's one of the boys in the whole town. Oh, that in the town. Oh, the city. Yeah. Not there. Yeah. No, they poisoned like a salad bar or something, didn't they? I don't know. Did she do something like that? They blew something up. They did a bunch of shit. They brought in homeless people for votes. I mean, they went wild. They went wild in the end. They brought in homeless people in buses so that the homeless people become part of their community and they'd have more votes. And then they took over the fucking town.

1:13:20And then they're like, audio is homeless, fucks. Yeah, good idea. And they kicked the homeless people out. Government is by the retarded.

1:13:30The retarded. The retarded.

1:13:41Of the retarded.

1:13:46I mean, that would do believes what he said. I believe what he said. The highest possibility men can attend. He's just a link for the first time. I was asking if he hasn't blanked. Wow. Yeah, he's probably the real deal. He's probably the real deal with he had Sheila behind him and she just got crazy and started killing folks. There's so many roles, Royces, to keep it out of the news. You know, you get a couple of them, man. 31. But if you're the real deal, if you really are a super guru and you want 30 roles, Royces, I think you can do it in that space. Yeah, in that space. In the Christian space, I don't think so.

1:14:34They're doing it. They got Gulf Stream 650s. You can buy 30 roles, Royces. I'm just saying it's harder to connect with the message. Cheaper, right. There's something about that, dude. The way he's willing to talk. Like that guy, O -Show, his book is really brilliant. There's an audio version of one of his books that I got into. It's interesting, man. His thoughts are very interesting. He had 93 cars. It's only 93, Ron. 93. He only had 93 cars. So he had a nice fleet of cars. He loved his role, Royces. He did. Yeah. But, right, you know, if he's the guy, you want him to have everything. You know, if you believe he's the guy and you can be, this is what I believe.

1:15:15I think you can be both. I think you can be this crazy 93 roles Royce having, fucking lunatic who lives in a castle that's made out of diamonds and this guy. You got money from your followers and also to be tuned into the real thing. The real energy of the universe. I think you can. I think you can. I think you can dance. I think that power corrupts absolutely for most people. For most people. But if you're a real super guru, like a hedonist super guru. Right. Because one of the things about a lot of those like crazy super guru type characters, like there's always some sexual aspect to it. It's always some sexual freedom and sexual expressing and they fucking hook line and sink or believe in each other.

1:15:58Right. Like that guy that owned that building that you almost bought for no reason. The Broadway recommendation. The Broadway recommended that I buy a cult building and I listen to him. Yeah. See? See? It would have worked. It would have worked. It would have worked. That was a cool building. Yeah. It would have worked. You would have made it work. That's for sure. We all supported it and it would have been fine. It wouldn't have been as good though. No. The location wise wouldn't have been as good. This turned out to be heaven. That's for a second guess. Anything that went down before it or after it or whatever.

1:16:31I feel like it lined up in the exact correct order. Like the universe opened up all the doors in the exact correct order. I feel like the failed experiment with that other place or the frustration and having it not come together was a good lesson. A good lesson in how real estate deals can go and how all the issues with property. Right. How careful you need to be. There's a lot of stuff going on when you're buying stuff. Sometimes you've got experience of failed deal and go, okay, that didn't work. Maybe this is better. And you were kind of impetuous so you needed something to slow you down a little bit.

1:17:12You zero going, you were going pretty nuts. Yeah. With decision. I mean, I talked to you one day. You were thinking about moving to Austin. And the next day you lived there, you had a house on the lake, you moved your studio. You're like, God damn, this guy moves. Yeah, I'm not interested in half -assing things. No, no, no, no. You moved right along with it. That's what the fun part about it is. Like a change like that is a big deal. Well, if you really if you look at it, and I'm pretty emotional about the mothership, but if you look at it, it was the only thing that could have got me where I am today.

1:17:48Nothing, no other vehicle would have worked because I wouldn't have been interested in it. I would have been interested in me being alone and isolating myself and all those things. But the mothership was that thing that was so delicious and so perfect for what I needed. At that point in my life, I think that the universe used you just to get me back out of this fucking hole that I was in. You know where I was at, and I was in a shitty fucking place. And I needed, I didn't know what to do. I didn't know where to go. I didn't know what to do with my emotions. I didn't know what to do with my, you know, a doubting everything about my talent and all this stuff.

1:18:30And, you know, so nothing else would have got me where I am today. And no other combination of things. There would have been an open mic night and webstered wherever that I would have gone to, and within the interest at all. And really started to fall back in love with the art of doing stand -up and be able to do all those reps. You know, that doesn't exist anywhere else. You know, that's what happens at the mothership. You can go in there and sharpen the fucking blade. You want to see what I'm doing with these crowds on the road. I'm beating the fuck out of them. I'm having a blast, except I still hate to travel.

1:19:05But, you know, we're real lucky. We're real lucky. And like I said, I feel like the universe opened up all the right doors at all the right time. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And put it all together in this perfect way. And we all benefit from having all of us here together for sure. It's 100 % benefits your act. 100 % benefits your joke writing. In the amount of fun that you have in life. And how hard we laugh in that green room. That's what I'm saying. The amount of fun you have in life. It's the most fun. And the best thing about the green room is how restrictive it is. You know, that you just can't go in there.

1:19:41You know, you're just not... You got to earn that spot in the tree house. You know, and so anytime you open the door, you'll see, you know, some of the best comics alive sitting there talking about stand -up comedy. You know, you know, writing jokes and laughing and having a good time. But, you know, that's our fucking little space, man. And it is the greatest thing on earth. The one of the worst things that happens in green rooms. What Ron's talking about is like, you'll be in a green room and a bunch of agents will walk in and start talking. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Especially in LA, you used to happen all the time.

1:20:11They all wanted to go in the green room. Yeah. So they'd go in the green room and I've done shows before, like, I've got these big theaters. And there's people, I don't even know how they are. Oh, hangin' around the green room. I'm like, okay. I don't even know who you guys are. It doesn't happen so much anymore, but in the past. Oh, and I played big venues out near California. Yeah. You guys, I didn't even know from APA and, you know, CAA or whoever the fuck I was with. Yeah. And then people from my office that I didn't even know, they're all back there in the green room. You know, trying to get a little bit, trying to prove to me that they're earning some kind of fucking money.

1:20:46I'm saying that I'm, or whatever, but that doesn't happen as the comedy mothership. It's just us talking about, we had really nobody knows much more about the business of this than we do. You know, that that's all collective group. We feed off each other. Yeah. It's like 100 % feed off each other. And this wasn't designed to be a commercial for the mothership, but it sounds like one. Yeah, we're both super lucky all of us are not just us in this room. And they were all of us together that we're all in on this together, because that's what it is. It's like we got a spot where we can all fuck around.

1:21:21And we have a lot of other spots in Austin now because of that, and along with that. Right. Basically, that makes the mothership a very proper name for that place, for that club. Yeah. Because everything else kind of feeds off of it. You know, that was the idea. Well, there was a bunch of other names that I had for it, but that was the idea. What I liked about that one is that we all do travel. And we're all stuck in this thing. If you're a stand -up and you, you know, who want to go on the road, you got to go places. But you have a place to go back to where you can keep your skills without traveling.

1:21:57That's what doesn't exist anywhere else. Well, that's what made me realize what we were missing when we came here. When we first came here, we were at the Volcan. It was great, but it was a great place and loved Nick and everybody that worked there. But it wasn't set up perfect. It was hard to get around. You had to go downstairs to get on stage. It was like, there's a lot of annoying shit about it. There was like kind of goofy the way it was set up. And it's a great room to perform in like the acoustics are fun. Like the rattles, you know. But I was like, we need the setup to be correct. And if we get the setup completely correct, just do it absolutely the way a comic could do.

1:22:34Just do everything the way the comic could make it everything. So it was like the fucking easiest ride ever for the comics. The coming in, we go to the other day up to the stairs. That's right. Yeah, it's just easy, fun. Everybody's going to have a good time. Let's go have fun. Let's have fun. And that's what we needed. Because we were on the road all the time. And when you're on the road all the time, it's like you're in these places. You're only going to be there for a couple of nights. You're doing your stand -up with a couple of friends you came with. And then you go back home and then you wait until you go somewhere else again.

1:23:01You don't have a home base. Yeah. Touch in like Ron, why are you now a Cincinnati? Right. No, no, no. Those Tuesdays and Wednesdays are the shit, man. There they are. They're the shit. They are. And you know, it was kind of like it was at the store for a while. Yeah. You know, when we were all supporting it at the same time. And you know, the crowds were, you know, it was always packed because they knew they were going to get a show. They couldn't get any other time for any price. That show doesn't exist anywhere else. And the other night we did a show and it was me and you and Shane Gillis and Jim Norton.

1:23:37Yeah. That guy makes me laugh hard on anybody. Yeah. And Theo Vaughan came in. And he was in one night at the comedy mothership. Crowd didn't know. We don't even know. You know, you don't even know who's all going to show up on the night. But there's always room. You know, if you're, you know, if you're one of the big Kamaya Mayas, you know. There's always room for you. It's just fun. It's just a real fun environment. It's a real fun place to fuck around. You know, and now that we have that, it makes it easier for us. It makes it easy for you to do this tour you're doing and makes it for all of us.

1:24:14It's just a place to keep your chops. You know, and it's all, and I don't care if you're doing short sets or long sets. You need to be doing sets. Because it keeps that familiarity with you and that audience. And it keeps that all of you. And it's all secondary. It's something that you don't even think about. It's what you do with every goddamn day. And that's what you should do. And then that matter if you're on the stage for 15 minutes or an hour and 15 minutes, it's just that you've got to get on stage and talk to those people. And just so it's second nature to you. And if you don't do it for a while, it's not.

1:24:46You think about it. You know, we don't think about since before we walk on stage at the mothership. You know, this is what we do all the time. But you remember what it was like when we took all those months off for COVID, then you did stand up. Fuck, I was horrible. I couldn't believe how fat I was. And I didn't even know. That was the big question is for me was I didn't know what I was so good at that made it special to watch. You know, I didn't, because I was just doing an impression of myself and I didn't have that confidence in all those things that come from knowing what's going to happen.

1:25:18I saw your first set back at the Vulcan. You fucking killed. Fuck, it was awful. You fucking killed. You're out of your mind. You're out of your mind. You got big laughs. I think it just didn't feel comfortable for you. I think you didn't feel like you were killing because it didn't feel comfortable because you just haven't done it in so long. I think that's all it is. But for the audience member, you killed. If you look at that set versus my 15 minutes that I'm doing now, where you were talking about the other night, that timing and all that stuff is back to sharp, you know, how I got here stuff.

1:25:53And that's all growth that comes from fucking doing reps. It's definitely, it's a gym. That's for sure. And if you work out, you see the results. And if you don't, you don't. I think it's just like golf. It's just like everything. Yeah. Well, it's something I understand and I love. And so I, you know, if you only play golf with idiots, right, you know, like you never touched it really learnably golf. You just, yeah, and then you'd be going, I'm so great. You know, it's it's better to hang out with guys that can hit the ball first than you. Yeah. You know, that's fine. That's fine. Because you can still beat those guys.

1:26:28You know, if you're lucky, if you're smart. Yeah, well, that beat, there's always in groups of guys. It's always the one guy who's the dominant golf player, right? Yeah. Yeah. And that's it. I used to be me all the time. But now when I play down, I've got these friends that, you know, that are fucking proud of you. Is that a rap thing? Is that just a rap thing? Or is there a certain characteristic that some people have that makes them like really good at golf? I think that some people are born with a, with an innate ability for athletics, you know, and some people aren't. And you can, you can try to get to that place all as hard as you want to.

1:27:02Like John Daly, you know, you need a gifted athlete, you know, and he would, no matter what he had done, he would have been great at it. Yeah. But he chose to do it with golf and his situation at home was real fucked up. Abusive father, horrible shit, just horrible shit. And I know a lot about him. I've spent a lot of nights drinking with him. And, but he had these hands, man. And this ability to turn his back to his target and just keep going. And it generated literally no one had ever seen anybody do what John Daly did. When he first started hitting, when he first came on the scene, the other pros were going out to the drive and were saying, he's going, watch this.

1:27:41And he's hitting the ball 75 yards past everybody and hitting the middle of the fairway with it. And they're like, but he was so self -destructive that he, he couldn't, he could manage it to some point, you know, I don't know. And John didn't know either. I'm sure. But, you know, we won two majors, which, you know, most people that play professional golf or never win one, and, or never win a tournament, that most people that have a car to play on the PGA tour, never win on the PGA tour. So, he didn't do earth shattering stuff like Tiger did as far as the numbers go. But, you know, he, he just had that natural ability and his son is just like him.

1:28:23Which is kind of a weird thing, because that father's son thing didn't mess up. And then who knows if it ultimately will. But his son's got a pocket full of money, bet with everybody there, he's about 16. You know, he's in college now. So, he's quite a player and he's got his dad's back swing. And, you know, it's, damn. So, it's genetic. Well, some of it's got to be, you know. Yeah. And then you, man, I would imagine. Yeah, there he is right there. I would imagine that. And that's who I play golf with. Where there's the fucking belt. Yeah. That he, they won the father's turn. Nice. And then they beat Tiger in his kid.

1:28:55Bro, how great are John Daly's pants? Yeah, those pants. Those are so classic. Yep. And you can, little skulls all over him. And, green alligator shoes. He's awesome. He's one of a kind. That's one of a kind. One of a kind. How many did I say he drinks a day? Well, he drinks a poor, he just drinks so much. But he drinks diet coaks in chocolate milk. And he doesn't really eat. And then he drinks vodka by the Galobalans. You know, you can't get chocolate milk. If you go because we, the, we, I've stayed in the same house with him before. And he's also oddly enough, he's a neat freak. He gets up in the morning and he'll make breakfast for everybody.

1:29:37That's in the, you know, the golf fucking complex there, like four, four rooms or whatever. He's up in the morning vacuuming, trying to stuff it up. Not even his job to do it. And, but he's a neat freak. And he loves to cook for people. And, and at night, he'll sing songs and play guitar until you're so bored with it. You can't stand yourself. And, you know, but it's a hoot. It's a show. But in the refrigerator, gallons of milk, and a chocolate Hershey's chocolate squirt bottle, he makes it up himself, you know. And, and then, he makes his own chocolate. And then he stirs in and then diet coaks.

1:30:10Oh my god. And then cigarettes, you know, one after another. What did that pull that back up, Jamie? With the, the statistics that you were showing, the statistics he was just showing about, how many cigarettes and diet coaks he drank in one game? This, this is a daily diet. I don't know. Yeah, but that one image that you had on the other page, there was a, you had, there it is. John Daley smoked 21 cigarettes and drank 12 cans of coke and no water at a PGA tour event. John Daley once smoked 21 cigarettes and drank 12 cans of coke at a tour event with no water. The controversial golfer is known among fans for his somewhat different styles today's fitness success stars.

1:30:53So if he drank 12 Coca -Cola's though, you do have to think like that is a lot of energy and a lot of sugar. Yeah, and this guy doesn't practice ever at golf. He doesn't, He'll go out there and he'll hit sand wedges and he'll hit maybe four of them. And it goes straight to the tee box, whether he's playing a professional tour event or playing with the guy, and he tells me he just hits some sand wedge. You gotta hit that side. If you can hit that solid, you can hit them all solid. Just do that. There's no sense working your way through a bag and spending all goddamn day. You know, just get, because you're trying to get loose, not better.

1:31:29We're playing, right? You don't have time to get better. You just got time to get loose. Get loose with one club. But, but that's just how much ability he's got. Most of these guys, you know, they take this shit serious. Every goddamn day of their life, hours and hours and hours of day go into nothing but preparing. He spends no time at all. And he doesn't win very much. But, you know, he makes a lot of noise. And he lives life the way he wants to. And he's so unapologetic and... And he's kind of a hero because of it. Yeah, yeah, he's totally a hero. And he should be. He is a living legend of athletic fucking superior.

1:32:10And there he is. There's his endorsement right there. He's loves hooters. That's hilarious. Yeah, after years and years, I'd go to the masters and I'd park my bus right next to his bus at the hooters. And hilarious. And go down and watch the game. And he would make a fortune because people go to that tournament to see golf, right? But those guys aren't available. You know, they don't come... They don't stick around signing autographs and do shit like that. John does. So he's got a merch tent set up at the hooters. And he'll do $400 ,000 worth of business in a week just sitting there signing stuff, flags, whatever, taking pictures.

1:32:52He hustles that parking lot. And does it every year. He's always out there. You know, he's nice anyway. And he likes fans. And he'll talk to you about anything, anybody. And if he's in a good mood, if he's in a shitty mood, maybe not. But he still gets it, you know. Because he gambles a lot. So he never has... I don't think I ever had a big surplus of money. It's some big deals from Calloway. But I think he's playing slot machines, a thousand bucks of pool all the time. And so he's always had the hustle on the side. But he gets it done. Now he's got a vodka drink, kind of like the orange palm or except it's got booze in it.

1:33:33It's called the John Daily selling shit out of it. Yeah, what is the John Diller? What's the mixture? Andre Palmer's lemonade and iced tea, right? I think then you had some vodka. I wouldn't imagine. Is that what it is? Yeah, yeah. Yeah, vodka. Fuck yeah. Yeah, him and I quit drinking. You know, that about three years ago. And Kid Rock hangs out there all the time. And they're really good buddies. And he plays golf. It's just not a great golf course either. It's just one we all go to. And you know, it's got good greens. And we have fun time out there. And they'll be banging on the door of my bus.

1:34:07We're going to the Teddy Bar. Come on, I'm going to the block too. What part of... I don't drink anymore. Do you not understand? I'm not. I'm not going to the Teddy Bar with you and Kid Rock. And what you guys... Jack was strippers till dawn. And hilarious. So now they don't talk to me much. Those fucking guys when they sober up, the party's all gone. Right. That's right. Yeah, I read something the other day said, if you quit drinking, that doesn't automatically make you know fun. That's a separate decision you have to make. That's very well put. Yeah, right. Very well put. I know a lot of comics that stop drinking.

1:34:46Like David Tell, I think, is the best example of a guy who stopped drinking and just got way better. Like he was always hilarious. He was always an amazing comic. He's always been fun. But I think it was just taking a toll on his body. And then when he quit, it's like all of a sudden he had energy again. He was writing a shit ton of great material. I think he's at like his highest level ever now. And he hasn't drank in a long time. Yeah, longs getting better. Years and years. But you know, he was out of control though. I mean, he was full of bit. Yeah. Well, he had that show in some. Yeah, that was true.

1:35:25I mean, that's what he would do every night. I worked with him. I ended up doing a bunch. I went to the Montreal Comedy Festival. And he and I, we didn't know each other. We were doing a bunch of shows at the, at the dirty show or whatever it was. Oh, yeah, man. There were like 12 shows in a week. And so we met. That's back when he drank and I drank. And so we were fast friends. And I thought he was funny as fuck. I had never seen any of it. And I just fucking loved to tell. And he's so much fun to hang out with. He's one of the best of all time. But he would come through town. And boy, after the show, he's gone.

1:35:57You know, he goes into a dark and other world of, you know, whatever's going on down there. He finds it. Yeah. You know, so, but he didn't do anything. I mean, he quit everything. He got sober when, when people go, I heard you quit getting fucked up. I'm like, yeah, you heard it wrong. You know, you heard it. There's quick, there's more than one way to skin a cat. It's the way I, the way I look at it. I think the way you're skinning it right now is the best way. Fuck yeah, I think so. It's the best way. It makes for the most fun. I don't, you know, I, I feel really good about all the decisions I made that got me where I'm right this minute, you know, as far as liquor goes.

1:36:33I didn't, you know, it makes for the most fun. The situation we're in right now is it makes for the most fun. If they would just hurry up and decriminalize mushrooms and things along those lines. Yeah, yeah, because then we'd start doing mushrooms. But as long as they're against the law, we don't do it. Exactly. We're against it. That's what I'm saying. We put a, we put a stop to it. We're, in fact, we're part of the mechanism. The magic of the, the only thing that can really get us out of this, but we're all so dismissive of it. Sounds loony tunes, right? But if you could give mushrooms to every living human being on this planet all in one day, we could sort a lot of shit out.

1:37:09That's what Hicks said. It was our accelerator pad to our evolution, you know. Well, he was a big Terrence McKenna fan and he quoted Terrence McKenna in his act. Terrence McKenna was the guy who came up with that theory that the reason why human beings evolved is from mushrooms. Oh, okay. It's called the stone -daped theory. It's a crazy theory. What is pharaoh scientists recommending easing restrictions on marijuana? Oh, I did see that. Yeah, they want to make it a schedule three. So it has some medicinal uses. Shrooms or weed? Oh, weed first. Oh, it'll, it'll, it'll never give it to you all at once.

1:37:44It's just two revolution. Well, Texas, you know, we still don't even have mercy weed. You can't, if you have cancer, if you're dying to cancer. I don't think so. Not in Texas. There's no medical weed in Texas at all. You have, it's like 0 .3%. You could get, if you have, if you're dying next week or something. Right, which is kind of weird because, you know, nothing, you know, I mean, you would buy the edibles that you can buy or THC edibles. And they, but they got it, that law passed because they didn't understand the law. Because they were going by weight of something and, but they didn't realize that they're saying, okay, these gummies are 14%.

1:38:19You know, so they're trying to fight it now, but right now it's legal to buy that. But, and then something that's just like pot, like 1 milligram or whatever off, you know, they sell that and Delta nine. I don't smoke it because, you know, it's classified as marijuana and I would never do anything. Get for you. The illegal. Well, I witnessed Brian Simpson take a few of those gummies. Yeah. Right. And they were supposed to be very mild and he was very upset at how fucked up he was. That's very upset. This is outrageous. He was shocked. Does that really help us out of that? I've never tried. Ooh, that's a good question.

1:38:56That's a solid question, Jamie. Well, he's a friend of him. He said it's smelling salts weak someone up out of like a weak. I'm stupid. Yeah, it will because I'm used to one that are on the table in the green room. Yeah, you ever get too stoned to do a set and then you just pick up one of those salts and just jerky right out of it for a minute. You've probably, you've only taken the ones that we have at the, the mothership then. The, right? The what? You've never had the smelling salts here. No. Oh, this is significantly stronger here at the, right? The stuff that we have here in the studio versus the stuff that we have in the green room.

1:39:29The stuff we have in the green room is kind of old. So when you open it, you really got to get your nose in there. Oh, that really dig in. This motherfucker will knock your dick into the dirt. What makes you think I want my, not I wouldn't say you do. Dig in the octave of the dirt. It's worth experiencing because it's so potent. Well, it's shocking. Wait, let me get ready. You're going to press one or, yeah, you got any fresh. He's still four, I think, fresh ones. Well, let me see how bad, what's, do we have these in there? No, it's not a logical order. All right, let me grab one. I will see what we got.

1:40:00I take hobby to that one, maybe. I'm sure that's definitely going to do the job. All right, we'll see what's up. He's got frogs in here. Let me see what's up. Here we go. You'll know which one's stronger right away. Oh, that's probably pretty good. That works. Wow. This one's barely legit. Yeah, I'm not going to do it. No, no, no, no, no. I don't want it. Whatever it caused you to look like you just look like you're about to. I feel great now. Give me a minute. All right. I mean, I feel great. I don't know if that would, yeah, I think it would help. That's what I'm talking about. You know, I'm having a visit the glove.

1:40:47Talking about. Oh, that's what I'm talking about. I don't like when people talk shit about how easy smelling salt on. Oh, my God, you've never had real smells. I've never been this awake in my life. That's what I'm saying. That's what I'm talking about. Oh, man, I'm going to do one on the other side. Shout out to that dude, Juju Mufu, right? Am I saying it right? Shout out to him. The greatest smelling salt in the history of the world. Did you go in for a second? Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Oh, my God, you fucking hell. I only got it in one side. He's a damn old. He's the only one up one side if I had to get that out of your side.

1:41:18I thought it was going to leave the show. Man, I was... I was... I was worried you were going to get mad leaving the show. That was like math. That's very potent. That's what it feels like going down. Well, this guy who created this is like this crazy power lift to do. But there's no after effect of it. Is there... No. I don't think you should do it too often. I just did it once every 10 seconds. It was... It's not making me any smarter. Yeah, I'm okay. All right. Well, I don't have any... I don't have any where to go but fucking up. All of us have nowhere to go but up. That's what AI is all about.

1:41:51But I think it's probably not good. That's that guy. He created it. Look at the body on that son of a bitch. Look at the crazy shit he can do. Full splits in between chairs while holding up. It looks like Josh Blue. Yeah. Not in that picture. I mean, dude's a crazy athlete. Like that is absolutely ridiculous strength to be able to do that. And that's preposterous. So they... A lot of those power lift to dudes, they take a big class to the shit before they lift. Okay. I want to look like that. But I'm 67, right? Yeah. How many hours a day would I have to dedicate of my life? No bullshit. I mean, of course I could never get to that.

1:42:36No, you can't get to that. Of course. No bullshit. You could change your entire body with weightlifting and steroids in a year. We would get you to a Russian scientist and they'd hook you up with the latest fucking greatest top shelf. Like if we got a project, like did you ever see that documentary Icarus? It's a great Icarus. Yes. I think so. Yeah. It's Brian Fogel's... It says, right? Brian Fogel's... Why did I freeze there for a minute? Brian, who also did... You're just a dissident, which is another amazing documentary. But Brian did this race. He did it completely clean. And then he was going to get this Russian doping guy to tell him what to take.

1:43:22And then he was going to do the same race the next year or juiced up. And he was doing it for a documentary to show what the difference is. He's not competitive like he could win. Right. He's a very good cyclist though. So in the middle of this process of going through this thing with this Russian guy, Right. It comes out that the Russians cheated in the Sochi Olympics. And so when they cheated in the Olympics, they used piss that was like fake piss. They like smuggled piss through a hole in the wall. And this guy was a part of the whole program. And he's in this documentary. And these were all...

1:43:54All this has all happened to be cyclists? No. He's a cyclist. He gets doped up for this documentary. This is what he's doing. And so in getting doped up with steroids and EPO, he's talking to this guy who's the head of this Russian anti -doping agency. Who's really just... They're just Russian doping. I mean, so they just... Everyone's doped. Right. And this guy tells him everything. He spills the beans on the whole program. And now the guys seem like the fucking witness protection plan. They've got them going to shut all around the country to keep them alive. They want Russia, wants them dead.

1:44:26This fucking guy spills it. They juiced the whole Olympic team. And this guy, Brian got very lucky and caught it in the middle of it happening. So it's just dumb luck that the Russians get busted for doping while he's doing a documentary on doping. With the guy who did the fucking doping. And he didn't have anything to do with them getting exposed. No, not at all. It was... What happened was they used these jars that were supposed to be impregnable. Right. So there's this jars you would urinate into the jar. And then once they had your sample, it would be sealed in a way that no one could open.

1:45:02Well, they found these micro scratches. They're all over the inside of these supposedly sealed jars that led them to believe that someone had figured out a way to hack into that and open these things. And they realized that the Russians had figured out a way with a new piece of equipment. They engineered, they got their own bottles. And they got... They engineered a tool that would allow them to open it up. And then they would put it back on. So they would go and they would take the piss out. And they would bring it in with a new bottle. And the new bottle was filled with clean piss. And so there's...

1:45:32Literally, they had a hole in the wall. Literally had a hole in the wall where they were swiping out the clean piss for the dirty piss. Look at this. They have an official urine sample room hole in storage space. And in the storage spaces where they had all the clean urine. And they got busted while this guy was doing it. So if we got that guy, that Russian, right, to turn you in and we'll fucking stud. Yeah. We need about 16 months. We need about 16 weeks. But do we really need to run wide? It's all amped up on that. We don't need that. No. We don't need that. But if you ever want to go that way.

1:46:02No. You don't need that. But just like, you know, you don't need to play golf. Yeah. Well, I've the one that asked the question. No, no, no. It's a fair question. It's like, how long would it take? I mean, you're not obese. You're fit because you walk around a lot. You're doing a lot of golf. You're playing a sport all the time. So you're active. I stretch for that game. So I'm pretty, I'm pretty limber for, you know, 67 -year -old. That game looks like it would really benefit from like rotational work. Yeah. Do you do like, you ever do with a trainer or do you do like cables? No, you know what I do.

1:46:39Everything I do in my golf swing right now, I do to avoid two tears I've gotten my shoulders. But for the most part, it doesn't hurt to make that run. As long as everything stays connected, it's, it's when I do like this, that they really hurt. Have you ever done stem cells? Yeah, well, with the same guys that, with the waist of well folks. And it's better than it was because before I couldn't do that at all. And now I can. And it doesn't really hurt that bad. But before, if I got into there and just pushed it back a little bit, it not only hurt, it hurt when I quit doing it. And still it, you know, it's not, it's not exactly right.

1:47:16It's not exactly right. I have a plan that can help you tremendously that I use for my shoulders. I have no affiliation with this company. It's called crossover symmetry. I bought it, I bought it online, I think I bought it on Amazon. I had one at home and one at the gym. It's a bunch of different cords. They attach to posts and they have these cables. And some of them are like 10 pounds, some of them are 15 pounds, some are 25 pounds. And they give you a plaque. And the plaque has a series of different exercises for your shoulders. All for shoulder strength. It makes a giant difference, a giant difference.

1:47:49So you use these cables and it's not hard work. You're not like lifting heavy weight or anything like this. This is like rehabilitation and strength work. So you're on the last ones, you are getting like a good pump, but it's very controlled. It's very controllable. And in the process, you're strengthening your shoulders. You're strengthening all the things that are not that strong, which is why you're probably getting injured in the first place. Unless it's some sort of a catastrophic situation. For the most part, people get injured because their shoulders just aren't in good condition. Now I fell when I was young off a cliff into a pool, it was 78 feet, Hamilton's pool, right over here in Austin, Texas.

1:48:30And I landed not like you should land. So it was catastrophic. Everything is sprained both wrist and my shoulders. But I never had it looked at. It was just bad for a long time. I had it just a few years ago in Beverly Hills. I had them do a cast can or whatever the fight was. Am I right? Am I right? Would this, uh? You said you got tears in both of them. There. That's where I fell right here. It was 78 feet. Oh my God. And it was, I was standing at the top where people were jumping off and I was really drunk. And, uh, and I didn't really jump off. I kind of tripped and stumbled and then just went, oh well, I'm going with it and fell off.

1:49:04Shit. And, uh, and I just landed like I was sitting down with my arms kind of back. Oh, God. How deep is it? How deep is it? Well, I turned down. I wasn't very deep into it. It's a pretty deep pool, but I don't even know. But I was this far underwater because that's how flat I landed. I didn't even go underwater. And, uh, so, no, that must have sucked. I would knock the breath out of me and people were like, are you okay? And I'm like, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh. Which they, they took that to me. I'm fine. Yeah, don't do a thing. Well, even if you have damaged your shoulders, that, uh, shoulders, strengthening program will help you.

1:49:39If you, it'll help you retain, um, range of motion because you're doing it kind of slowly. And if you just stay persistent with it and consistent and just do it every day. And if you do it every day, you're not even doing it like that hard. It's not like a thing where you're like killing yourself. But you're doing like eyes, wise and tees with like little dumbbells, do things like that. And do just do like easy things that strengthen your shoulders. You'd be amazed at how much more shoulder mobility and strength you'd have. If you just strengthen all the connective stuff. Yeah, I'm sure. I'm sure that doing anything would be more than I'm doing now, which is absolutely nothing.

1:50:16Yeah, can I fucking train her, Ron? Get some, you know what? I tried to get, I used to have, sassy young lady that's gonna crack you in the shape. I used to have my yoga instructor come over my house every day or five days a week. And she was beautiful and smart and funny and she was great. And I was basically a yoga nap. It was so easy breathing and then, you know, with smells and she was all mystical and she. I like it. And but my girlfriend was like, yeah, yeah, I think you could call on her part. Right. Right. Yeah, she was all over me. She's never wrong. She's got this intuition that she's never been wrong.

1:50:53Yeah. But they don't want that around your man. That's them yoga freaks. Yeah. They're a little bit more intuned to sexuality in a room. It's 94 degrees and they're all sweating on top of each other. Yeah. Yeah, it has a lasting impression. It has taken their branches up in the air. I mean, every is a little bit more free after a yoga class. But it was still good for me. It was a good way to start the day. Oh, yeah. And it was a great way to start it. I used to love doing it that way when I lived in California. I used to do the beacroom style. They changed the name after he got busted a bunch of times.

1:51:26It was, it was beacrooms when I first started. And it was that series of poses, which I think he just popularized. I don't, I don't believe any of them. I don't even know if he put them in that order. If they were already in that order that people do them, but whatever it is, that order, forget what you think about him. It's gross as that guy is that that guy is he's very funny. He wasn't all that gross. He wasn't all that gross. People don't tell one million dollars for one drop of my sperm. He ever see him say that. Yeah. He ever see him say that? A million dollars for a jade. I earned that.

1:52:00I mean, he's a psychopath. Yeah. Wow, man. But that guy, um, that's why you really can't start fucking your followers. Yeah. Because it's just going to, he's seen, even though it seems like a good idea at the time. But yeah, he was getting a lot of. He's a cult leader. I mean, I think it's just like any other cult, even though it does provide the benefit of the yoga. So the thing is like whatever it is, like, is he take him out of the equation because it's not, they're not his exercises. And I don't think they're his order. Can you find out if that's the truth? If you put it in that order, if you invented the order, but whatever it is, if you just follow those exercises in that order, it's awesome.

1:52:40And you do it every day. And there's no variation. I love variation in yoga class. I love to be able to go into yoga class and doing different stuff. It's fun. But I also love going to this class where it's a 90 minute class. And there's a specific number of movements. And you know what they are because you've done this over and over and over and over again. It's a fucking challenge. And you're all in there, cutting it out together. Like that's a real human struggle. I know it sounds like this. My experience was nothing like that. This was a guy. I want a little thing stretching my back while I'm laying there breathing in some incense.

1:53:14That's good too. Yeah, but doing some breath work. Listen, that's good too. And just breathing and no grunting. Well, with the 90 minute one, you got to be hydrated. You got to be prepared for that. You got to get some electrolytes in your system. Yeah, I went through a hot yoga one time and I literally threw up in a parking lot. I was in there. It made me sick and I'd eat and whatever I guess you shouldn't eat. I think they do it at 104. I think it's 140 degrees. The Vucramioga also falls as sequence of 26 postures. Students have perfectibility and circulation through this sequence with the high temperatures allow them to enter each pose, posture more easily.

1:53:51The poses were chosen from chud hurry, from classic hot poses designed to systematically move fresh oxygenated blood to 100 % of your body to each organ and fiber. So it was him. He came up with this sequence. I think he hacked it. I'm not finding it necessary. Because he made a budget claims about winning yoga tournaments in this country. And they're like, we don't have yoga tournaments in this country. It's a yoga kumatae that we eat in the woods. The yoga to death. Okay, hot yoga studio practice different types of yoga. Most of you is trying to keep their hot yoga classes anywhere from a balmy 75 degrees to a steamy 95 degrees.

1:54:30The elevated temperature. I think they do 104. Yeah, okay. Here goes. Since we practice beacom your goals to replicate the environment found in southern India, our yoga teacher set the thermostats from 103 to 108 degrees. Let's go. No, that's hot yoga. That's what Tony does, right? Does that every week to beat Floyd music? Yeah, they have. Yeah, that's he says really good class. But he loves doing that hot yoga. It keeps Tony normal. It helps him with his evil brain. Yeah, his evil brain needs a touch of the divine. Yeah, he needs to be connected. I love him to death. He's the best. You sold out the fucking Madison Square Garden.

1:55:08It's sold to you. Two vases Square Gardens. They're killing the game. They deserve everything they're getting. You know what? And that just when he came up with that idea, that didn't sound like a good idea to anybody. I don't think you know that we're going to get guys that suck for sure. And they're going to do a minute and we're going to make fun of them or whatever. Try to help them or you know, but but it's such an engaging, amazingly great idea. Well, you know what it is. It's an idea that was developed entirely by Tony and Red Band together over years. So Tony comes up with the idea. He partners together with Red Band.

1:55:47They figure out how to do this slowly over years. So they're doing it in the belly room of the comedy store in front of like 50 fucking people. There's no one there in the beginning. They're doing it from that to selling out mass Square Garden in three hours in like 10 years. Right. Which is, but yeah, you can question it all you want to. But if you leave a great comic alone and let him come up with his own thing and figure out no one's better at hosting a show than that guy. Oh, nobody. Because, you know, he was he's into wrestling. So everything he announces, it's hard to follow the fucking credits that he gives you when he brings you on stage in that thing.

1:56:26You know, if you're one of his regulars, you know, you think this guy sold out three nights. It's fucking matters of Square Garden. You got to go follow that intro. But, you know, nobody could do it. Nobody else could do it, but him. He's so quick. He's so quick with like roast lines. Like when him and David Lucas go at it, I swear. I don't think I ever laugh harder in life. When him and David, there's some videos of him and David Lucas going out of world. I'm red like a grape and I can't breathe because I haven't I haven't taken into breath in 30 seconds. I'm just laughing. I'm just dying. They're so good at going back and forth with each other.

1:57:03They're so good. There's a shit ton of videos. We don't have to play any of them. But if people are interested in the shit ton of videos online of Tony and David Lucas, they're like, I've been telling these fucking dudes since the beginning of time. Not like Tony needs anything else now. But if you wanted to do another podcast, the podcast is him and David Lucas just talking shit and reading the news. I'm like, you two get together and just talk shit about the news and start ragging on each other. It would be immensely popular. Immensely popular. Those two dudes have magic together. There's something about those two characters when they get together and start talking shit to each other.

1:57:39They're both laughing when they get each other. There's no hard feelings at all. Right, none. None at all. Not at all. When Tony gets David Hart, David is the hardest laffer in the room. He's laughing harder than anybody and he's enjoying it. He doesn't feel bad at all, not even a smidgen and neither does Tony. When Tony, when David gets Tony and Tony goes, you son of a bitch. Yeah, you son of a bitch. You got me. You start talking about his balls, but you have son of a bitch. Son of a bitch. It's just, they have so much fun. It's amazing because it's just such a well -oiled machine. It's been running so smooth for so long.

1:58:17And then the New Year show has just took them to a totally different level. You know, having Jelly Roll come out there and saying to open up the show. What the fuck, man? Yeah. What the fuck? Everybody wants to participate, you know? Oh my god, it's so special. It's fucking awesome. And it's, I tell everybody. It's the cornerstone of Stand Up Comedy in Austin. It's the cornerstone because it's a place where people can get their first time ever on stage. And you could do it in front of a million fucking people. Yeah, I don't know. I was pretty nervous and it was like 85 people. Yeah, but it's okay.

1:58:55Like, do you want to do this or not? Right. You know what? It's not you. But you know what I'm saying? Most amazing thing. The people coming up. Because it does send a net out there to find talented people. That they might not have seen that avenue to get to where we are another way. You know, but their fans are that. They're like, I could do that. Yeah. Do what it takes to get in it. And also it encourages the spread of other rooms around town. You got enough talent that they get together. And then a guy says, hey, I have a room. Do you guys want to book a room? Do you want to, and then you always get that from the more industrious of the comics.

1:59:32They'll like figure out a bar over here. Two -day night comedy night. And so the amount of work that folks can get around here is crazy right now. You know what I used to do? I used to go to hotels that had a restaurant in them. And I'd have set up a comedy competition where you won $25 and a meal for two people. And then I would only invite comics. I knew I could beat because I wanted that money. I needed to get $25 and that free dinner for two. Me and Lori Marshall's mom would go down there. Just happy as we could be eating our free food. I want another one. You know. I'm John Mcdonnelly. Yeah, I couldn't get hold of them.

2:00:12That's smart. Oh yeah. What a great way to... A little stage time. Nice. That's a good scam. Free food. That's a solid scam. Yeah. Yeah, when I lived in Boston, we were real lucky. There were so many road gigs. There were so many gigs you could do on Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday. You could almost work seven days a week if you knew enough booking agents. And you were willing to drive. You had a reliable car. You could go to Hampshire one night. Next night you're in Bill Ricca. Next night you're in Rhode Island. You're moving around. Well, you know what I did, which was pretty smart.

2:00:44And I never accused myself of being smart very often. But I noticed that really you're a master of ceremonies. You're not the opening act. You know, your biggest job as the opener was to be the MC. And so if you did a written, I noticed everybody was doing a really shitty job. They had a crinkled up notes in their pocket next week at the thing. And I was like, and I'm like, I'm going to get good at that, you know, and my act too. But I'm going to do a really good job. I'm going to study the notes. I'm going to know them. I'm going to make it look like a show. You know, I'm going to do a better job at being a host than those guys are.

2:01:19And then I had, there were four clubs in the Dallas area. I worked one of them once a month as the opening act. So I worked every goddamn night, nine shows a week. And, but you know why? Because I was a better fucking host now because I was funnier. I was just, I made it look like showbiz. That's nice. Like a slick fucking deal. Yeah. That's what Tony does. He makes it look like a, look like a fucking, the right kind of package, you know. It's done the right way. But it's also wild too. That shows wild. Some of the shit they say is so wild. It's so, it's so go for it. Well, that's why, you know, that's what I love about it.

2:01:52Because you don't know. You don't know. That decade stack folks. But hey, let me tell you something. I tried to stack it one time because my banker wanted to do stand up. And I thought I could just slide him in. They were like, no, fuck away. They do those coming out of a hat. Yeah. We don't know who they are. It's the only thing. And you guys explain to me. And I'm like, of course, that's right. Yeah. Of course, that's right. It has to be like biblical law. Yeah. You know, like you have to just really reach in there and really get a piece. Otherwise, you're lying about the whole thing. Right.

2:02:19Right. And I'm telling you folks, I tried. Yeah. And I was shot down. No, it's the show crackles. It crackles with it. And to go back to my banker and go, yeah, I can't do anything really to help you. That's hilarious, your banker. Yeah. It's going to give you an interest rate of decrease. I'm sure he's hilarious. Or the world's missing out on something big. Maybe fun to watch about. But you know what? The thing is, you can come up there and with a recommendation from me, you can do three minutes on Monday night. Sure. Yeah. You do know the mic night. Open mic night. So that's what he did. Well, that's a great way to start.

2:02:51That's how you want to start. You don't want to start on Kill Tony. But a lot of people have it. Well, yeah. Right. That's what I mean. That would be a hard place to start. Insane. And especially if you know it's a million fucking people. But also like amazing thing to document if that really was the first time. And you actually wound up running on from there and having a career. Yeah. And you'd have good footage of it. Yeah. I mean, look, it can be done. It can be done. If you're funny, there's just people out there that are you, we all know people that are so funny. That for whatever reason, never decided to stand up.

2:03:18Yeah. For me, it was my boss. I was working for a private investigator at one point in time. And he lost his license, drinking driving. And he put it in an ad for a private investigator's assistant. It was really just someone to drive him around because he didn't have a license. And so I was looking for like unconventional ways to make money while I was doing martial arts. So that was what I decided to do. I started working for this guy when I was doing stand -up comedy. And I just started. I was just like one open mic, two open mics in. Like I just started. And I met this dude. And he was absolutely the funniest dude I had ever met in my life.

2:03:49I couldn't believe how funny he was. Funnier than any of the comedians at the clubs. Totally natural laughing about everything. And the guy fucking went cold turkey. No AA, no programs, no nothing. Crash his car, ran from the cops, got busted. And he's like, you know what? I'm fucking done. I'm fucking done. This guy was a character, man. He was a fucking character. So the name is Dave Dolan. He used to call himself Dynamite Dickless Dave Dolan. He's one of the funniest fucking human beings I've ever met. And he just drove him around. He drove him around for months. Because I forget how long he lost his license for.

2:04:24I don't know what it is. You know, when your license gets suspended for DUI. But he lost it for quite a amount of time. And during that time, I was making my transition from stand -up, from fighting to stand -up. Because I was in the middle of both worlds. And it was while I was working for him. Where you still playing pool? Where you playing pool at all? No, I wasn't playing pool at all. No, I wasn't playing pool at all. I didn't start playing pool until I hurt my knee. I mean, I played a couple of times here and there with friends. But I wasn't like really into it until I tore my ACL. You know, if you have an ACL injury, it has to be diagnosed.

2:04:58And then you have to schedule an appointment. You have to get surgery. So it was a long time where I couldn't do any martial arts. It was just too unstable. It was really fucked up. I badly tore my ACL and tore my meniscus. It was like real wobbly. So I really couldn't do martial arts. It was only just like lifting weights. And I was looking for something challenging to do. And me and my friend would go, he got a job. My friend, John, got a job working at this pool hall. And he and I would just go there and just knock balls around for free during the day. Because he was working there. Right. So he'd be like working on the counter.

2:05:28And I just got obsessed with it, man. And I just happened to be around all these people that were like really good players. Like high level professionals would come in from the road. Because it was a gambling pool hall. It's called executive billiards and white planes. This is Boston. No, this was New York. Okay. So I didn't really get into pool until I was like 23, 24, 23, 24. That's when I really started getting into pool. The four stand up? No, I was in the middle of stand up. It was a problem where my manager said to me, he goes, I think you care more about pool than you do your career. Oh, shit.

2:06:03I was like golf. It was like your golf. I was playing every day, eight to ten hours a day. No shit. Every day, every day. I was traveling to go play tournaments. I was going to tournaments many nights of the week that I could have easily been doing stand up. I was going to play in tournaments. I'd go to Connecticut to play. I'd go to Jersey to play. I'd go to West End Billiards and watch the killers play. Wow. West End Billiards was this place in a real sketchy part of New Jersey. Ooh, it was sketchy. And it was this place where it was world -renowned as being like a players pool hall. Like Hawaiian Rodney Morris was there and fucking Mike Siegel played there.

2:06:42Like the greats of all time. Did they even have places like that around here? It's not that many of them. There's hard times in Sacramento. That's still a big one. That's a big one. They stream big tournaments from there. Yeah. That's that one's legit. That's a legit like real players pool hall. But there's a, there's not a lot of them left in the country, unfortunately. Because the game it's not very publicized except it's got more of a following now because the internet. Because people are watching those clips. Right, watching them. And they realize real high level pool, you know, like Joshua Filler watched that guy play.

2:07:18My favorite is this guy from Taiwan. His name is Coping Chung. He's my favorite. He's so smooth. When you watch that guy move the ball around the table, it's so effortless and precise. And his cue ball control is just magical, magical. He played in the US open and won 11 games in a row on a four inch pocketed table. If you, if you knew how crazy that is to run those kind of racks on a four inch pocketed table, it's like almost. So what is a four? I don't even know that's out. I don't even know. Okay, so if you buy a, a Brunswick gold crown stock from the factory. It probably has five inch pockets.

2:08:02If you buy a diamond, it has four and a half, but you can get it all the way down to four. And they got it all the way down to four full four inch pockets are fucking small. Yeah, they're small. And this fucking dude ran 11 games with four inch pockets. Four inch pockets. He went through the, he ran 11 games. I mean, like the other guy didn't get a shot for the guy. He went either the guy had a shot and missed and then he ran out or he had a safety. He made a safety and the guy had a kick and then he got the ball back. But whatever he did, he just played like perfect pool for a number of games.

2:08:41See, if you watch the guy play man, if you really know how to play, like, it's just effortless. There's something about the sti - and he, he just keeps getting better too. Like every time you see him and each turn to me, he just gets a little bit better. These guys all stop playing because of the pandemic. So for a couple of years, they couldn't play internationally. Right. So they kind of fell off a little bit. And only the guys who were in certain tours where you were allowed to still play, guys were playing with masks on. It got like real weird for a while. And some of the guys since international travel was limited.

2:09:13They didn't get that high pressure, you know, going to the US open in Atlantic City. That was the big one where he was at. That's like a big threat. That's where he was while that would be a shot. That's all the killers from all around the world gather up in Atlantic City. They know who's going to win. No. Before they go into it. You can't know who's going to win. They're too good. I mean, did they, so there's not a number one that's significantly better than everybody else. Like there wasn't golf or years with Tiger Woods. There's a guy named Shane Van Boning and he's one more than anyone. And he's won the US Open.

2:09:43He's tied with Earl Strickland, who's another one of the all -time greats. I think maybe Strickland has more. Strickland might have more. Who won the most US Open? Shane Van Boning or Strickland? Either way, this guy wins everything. He's won the world. Nine ball, he's won the US Open multiple times. He's favored to beat most people, but that doesn't mean he's going to win. Because a guy like Coping Chung could just run out. And you don't ever get a chance. Okay, Earl Strickland and Shane Van Boning both from the US share the record for winning the US Open. Nine ball championship the most time.

2:10:15Five. Strickland in 84, 87, 93, 97, and 2000. And Van Boning in 2007, 12, 13, 14, and 16. He's evil. He's evil on the table. And when he plays, he shuts his hearing aids off. He's got hearing aids. He shuts those bitches off. He needs to know the world of his own, man. He doesn't hear any gering. He's the pinball wizard. He's the pinball wizard. Yeah. He's the pinball wizard. Yeah, he's a monster man. He's a monster. But one of the greatest players of all time. Like if you have a list of the top five greatest players of all time, and you have Shane Van Boning on that list, we're not having a conversation.

2:10:50Well, it's your silly position. And what's his mother ship? Where does he go to hang out? Well, he's play pool. South Dakota's where he started out. They call him the South Dakota kid. He had a table in the basement that had really tight pockets. And he would practice his break on it so much that the center of the table was just white from being compressed from the cue ball, smashing it into the rack, and then slapping down the same spot over. And he broke so much that he created like a white cloud around where you rack the ball. Wow. Because he's just obsessed. And like universally regards one of the greatest breakers of all time.

2:11:22So if you're not the greatest, so these guys are on some spectrum. A hundred per slam. Yeah, right? Because it's kind of matter. You have to be. Yeah, you have to be. You want to compete? Yeah. You go get vaccinated. We need you. We need you in a fucking different realm. No, there's a lot of guys that are like super normal that are high level competitors. That are like normal guys. Like you could hang out with them. They're cool as fuck. It's just an obsession that they could have been doing that with anything else. Could have been disc golf. It could have been Frisbee. Carpentry. Whatever it is.

2:11:58These are just obsessive people that are fascinated by the game. It's a crazy tiger stat. I just saw over the weekend. Over a 10 years stretch from 99 to 2009 Tiger was more likely to win 34 % than finished 9th or worse, 32 % for 10 years. That's the same. Yeah. Yeah, it's a monster. Yeah, nobody ever racks up those kinds of numbers. Oh, it's a monster. You got 150 people every week. So you should win one out of 152, you know, instead of 25 % of the ones that you fucking enter, it's just crazy. Yeah, you have to be. I'll never be done again. I'd like to think. A mad genius to pull that off. And a mad genius raised by his dad to be that from the time he was really young.

2:12:42You know? Yeah, you'd have to have a springboard. Right. Yeah, I mean, that's what he was. Right. And also, like, if your dad plays golf, man, if someone in your family plays, I really, really wonder this. Are you transferring some of your comedy into your kids? Are you transferring some of your... They've said that even bad ideas, like even racism, can be inherited. There's this like a speculation. I forget how they ran that study. But they think that there's some aspect of thinking, and of life, and of experiences that somehow or another gets transferred to your kid. Which makes sense because the big ones do, like fear of spiders, fear of monsters under the basement, in the basement.

2:13:26Those fears that kids have... You think they come... They come from memories of being eaten by cats almost entirely. It's thousands of years of proto -hominance being slaughtered by cats. Oh, wow. Yeah, that's what we scared of monsters. So it just doesn't bother me. Well, it would if we were out to hide, Ron White. Yeah, it's something. I feel safe in here. I feel safe in here with your big frog burps. Yeah. Big frog burps. We have to have protection from the animals, folks. Don't get cocky. People are getting cocky right now. They're getting cocky. They're getting cocky talking about bringing grizzly bears back.

2:14:02Shut your fucking dirty mouth. Yeah. You want grizzly bears and Beverly Hills? What are you gonna... If they're gonna be fully protected, and you can't do anything about it, are you gonna count on the wildlife people to be able to get the grizzly bear? And you... Yeah, and you got an effect. Before it eats you. I'm gonna tell you right now, if that grizzly wants to fuck you, just let him fuck you. Let him fuck you. That's the best case scenario. Don't fight back, don't argue. Push back. Push back. Yeah. Make all the right noises. Do whatever it takes. You're like 10 lock you love it. You love it.

2:14:30Yeah. You fucking love it. You love living. Let that bear fuck you. Yeah. You imagine the kind of VD you get from a grizzly bear. Oh my god. Do you think that's what's going on after that? Yeah, I think so. Well, that... I think we tried to make that connection with syphilis. I don't think we did. But there was... I think someone had told me that there was two... It was a fucking really smart guy. I forget who it was. But if someone told me that there was two different strains of syphilis, and one of them seems to have definitely come from North America. So, like, sailors came over in the 1400s with like the Pintin and the Santa Maria and shit.

2:15:06When they went back, they brought syphilis with them. Because it seems like there was a different strain of syphilis that ran through Europe during that time period. The same place where these people had just got back from... So they picked it up from our locals? Yeah. And took it back with them. Well, what's all we did? We gave them horrible diseases. They gave us a few. They make fucking holes in your face. The syphilis was a wild one. That's a wild one. I got a lot of guys, man. Oh, killed a lot of people. A lot of people. Killed out Capone. That slow, brain rotting part. Fucking nothing you can do about it.

2:15:38Isn't scary that the diseases like that come from sex. So weird. So weird that nature is like... That should be so concerned that we're going to overpopulate it. Yeah. That it gives you diseases that you only get from sex. You have to live in fear. There's this scary one. Syphilis and AIDS. What scares you more than syphilis and AIDS? If you get a... Doc, I'm not feeling so good. Syphilis, please. They're either wanting to like... Oh, shit. Is this a syphilis, I guess? I don't know. Fucking problem. Magic Doth is doing okay. Man. As much shit as people talk about like pharmaceutical drug companies or medical science in general, I am so thankful they exist.

2:16:15Because if it wasn't for them, if there was no penicillin... Do you know what fucked we'd be? And I know people are saying, oh, people are abusing antibiotics. They are. They are. They get through. But... Isn't it great that we have antibiotics? Yeah. Because if it wasn't... Sure the fuck yeah. Yeah, the fucking people would be dead. And right. Not half, but you know what it's like. Back in the day, if you got a staff infection, that was a wrap. That was it, buddy. That's right. It's going systemic. It's taken over your blood. Yeah. And if you had breast cancer, you were done. That's just pure death.

2:16:47Own breaks. That's a wrap. You're losing that leg. Yeah, teeth gone. Done. You don't eat your starve. You can't keep up. There was this tribe that I was reading about. I forget whose book was it. But it was about what happens with the older women in this tribe. It's horrible. That the younger males, when they realize the older women aren't keeping up anymore, they'll sneak behind them and bludge them over the head. And... What's not keeping up? They don't keep up. Because they're nomadic tribal people. And it's... Oh, you mean they're like lagging behind the group? Exactly. And then what happens to them?

2:17:24They get killed by the younger males. So they have a fear of the young males. And they have a fear of... A natural fear of them. Yeah. Well, it's supposedly accepted in the tribe because it's understood that at a certain time, you're putting them in danger. You're putting them in danger by slowing them down. Right. It's really dark. It's really dark. I think it was at Malcolm Gladwell. I don't remember who... Killers of the Flower Moon, I think. No, Killers of the Flower Moon was the... I know. I googled tribe, young males, killed, or women, book. And that's what's popping up. They did that as well.

2:17:58It's just that book is popping up. They might have talked about it. They might have talked about it. I didn't see that movie. I've heard it's awesome though. Have you seen it? Killers of the Flower Moon? No, I haven't seen it. You see it, Jamie? I didn't watch the last night. Well, Jamie, was your report, please? What's it on? It's pretty good. It's still available for rent. It will be on something Apple or something next month. I don't know. I think it's on... It's on an iMovie right now. Yeah, it's on everything to rent. Well, Jamie, it's not available for free streaming, actually. Oh, I see.

2:18:23I got money. I don't know. I'm trying to save it on $3 .99. I didn't see it. $3 .99. I do want to buy it. I don't have that kind of money. I don't have that kind of money. I don't have that kind of money. I don't have that kind of money. I don't have that kind of money. I'm not going to buy it.

2:18:38I don't have that kind of money.

2:18:46I don't have that kind of money. I don't have that kind of money. I don't have that kind of money. I don't have that kind of money. I don't have that kind of money. I don't have that kind of money. I don't have that kind of money. I don't have that kind of money. I don't have that kind of money. But I was reading something very bizarre about Google and their terms of service and what they're going to do to adjust something for a sensitive event. Did you see that? I could say any of the article, but it was one of those ones where I read it and I was like, I read like one paragraph into it and I was like, Jesus Christ is starting to make me angry.

2:19:26I don't want to read into this. I don't know where my phone is, but I wanted to ask because it's something. Literally, if I go to Almond Brothers and go to, I want to listen to a song. It says no longer available in the country you're in and that's iTunes. But I can push the button and say, play the Almond Brothers band in it'll play it. But I don't have it at my command on iTunes. Like I did. I don't know where it went. I thought I was buying that stuff. That's what I meant. But apparently I wasn't buying it. Right. I just thought I was buying it because it didn't there anymore. Yeah, I don't know how that works.

2:20:03They must have some different licensing deals with certain songs. Jamie, that's not it. It's something that was real recent. And they were talking about what they would do for a significant cultural event. Let me see if I can. The new policy going affect February 24, clearly defines what constitutes a quote sensitive event for purposes of prohibiting certain explotative or insensitive ads and content. Yeah, that's it. Well, Google already had policies in place for ads and YouTube on tradition. This expands the restrictions to Google's publisher network as well. And so there was it was defined in a certain way.

2:20:40See if you could pull up at what it actually says because the way it was defined what disturbed me was that it's very blanket. A sensitive event is defined rather as an unforeseen or unexpected situation that poses significant risk to Google's ability to provide high quality relevant information while reducing incense. Incensative in sensitive content is that I have concern with that. Wow. In sensitive content in prominent and monetized features. Incensative content. Incensative to who? Exactly. So open a subjective. Now listen to this though. Sensitive events include those with major social, cultural or political impact such as civil emergencies, natural disasters, public health crises, terrorism, conflict or mass violence.

2:21:25So what they're saying is you must be sensitive. If you're going to discuss civil emergencies, natural disasters, public health crises, and he's doing with a major social, cultural or political impact, terrorism, mass violence, you must now be sensitive. The thing is like whatever they're trying to say and whatever they're trying to do to make the the online world a nicer place. You got to be really careful with saying things like that because sensitive is a weird term if someone is violently opposed to who? Right. Also what was someone is violently opposed to something that's happening. Like think about one or many of the military conflicts around the world.

2:22:06Don't pick a side. What if someone is violently opposed to these people dying and losing their lives and they're talking about it? Is that an insensitive piece of content that can now be censored by a new policy? Is that what it is? Or is it just going to demonetize it which they've kind of always done? I think this was talking about people who are making ads using their platform, not people who are hosting content on their platforms. I got to admit I'm a little lost on this one. I think I see a few of you are. So if any of the listeners out there are also a little confused as though? No, it's about them having the ability to censor you.

2:22:39So if you do the Ron White Show on YouTube, which is owned by Google, if they decide that this something of whatever you're doing is, in somehow or another offence, they would have wanted it. I don't know what they're saying they can and can't do. I think it's making ads. I don't know if it has to do with the content that again that's on YouTube. I think this policy content changes for people who use the Google ads platform and create ads like this one I'm showing you right here so that you can't abuse it. You can't amoditize it. But look how it's phrased please. Go back to the top sentence. So look at it says the updated policy provides practice including price gouging, misdirected traffic and victim blaming during sensitive events.

2:23:18I'm with the first ones price gouging, misdirected traffic. I'm in with those, but victim blaming during sensitive events, that one gets touchy. Because like what do we just use in the ads? It's like making some weird ad to pop up to get you to click on something that's going to pop up on content that might be about that event or anything like that. I understand. But victim blaming, the thing about victim blaming is you can do it both ways. Right like victim blaming like with Hamas and Palestine and Israel. You could go, you could victim blame on both sides. You could say the Israelis were doing this and that's why Hamas had to attack and you say Hamas attacked and that's why these Israelis are doing this and you fucking people should have known better and you fucking people should have known better.

2:23:57That's victim blaming. Sure. You've got to let people talk. Yeah. And if talking looks like victim blaming until people working out. Then why not? You can't just stop people from talking. So what are we saying? Are we saying that it's just they can't monetize that? Well, then what happens is if you're not monetizing stuff, you let people know that unless they self -sensor, it's going to cost them financially. Even if the ads like say if the represents a company that is actually interested in this discussion and wants to know, like what is the right, what's the right perspective on this? Who's most informed?

2:24:33Who's looking at this the most correctly? If you're a company and you're why wouldn't you want to advertise? I'm something where people are just talking about what may or may not be happening in the world. And if you're going to do that on YouTube, then you have to worry about you're losing your ability to make a living now. It's like, is that what happens? I don't know. I don't know. I mean, is this just a blanket policy in case of the most egregious offenses that all people agree are terrible and should probably not be okay? But then who gets to decide that? What happens is the frogs eating the mouths and shit like that?

2:25:11Ron Mike, this is the future of people being able to talk shit. That's what it is. No, I believe that, you know. It's kind of the future of people being able to talk shit because this is how it goes away. Right. It goes away through stuff like that. Sure. It goes away through people deciding that something's insensitive, which is like 98 % of all jokes. Right. Yeah, you don't want to come to mind. You don't want to come to mind. This one I'm saying. Here's their examples. Okay, here's some examples. All right, Violet says this. Okay, what does example is also ads that claim victims of ads that claim victims of sensitive event responsible for their own tragedy or similar instances of victim.

2:25:48Okay, ads. Yes, so it's just about ads. Yes, at least for now it is. You know, maybe they could switch and be like, now all content, but. Well, that's completely reasonable. If it's just about ads, that's completely reasonable. Right. Yeah, I guess you should want to be able to control how fucked up the ads are. Because that's kind of well, is it? It's just that. There's like you can start to use other parts of the internet that can still use propaganda. But you can't use propaganda. You can't use Google ads, which is the biggest part of the internet advertising world. Right. They shut you out.

2:26:19Do it somewhere else, it's all they're saying. Right. That seems reasonable. Yeah, that's pretty reasonable. As long as they're not doing that with the actual content of the podcast. Because I do know that they demonetize. They demonetize people all the time if you talk about certain subjects. It's always been a problem. And they don't do that to you. They used to do it. Yeah, they used to do it up until the time when we switched over to Spotify. They started to do it. They started to do it. They started to do it specifically under advertising policies. I think it's kind of... They don't do it to anybody or...

2:26:47No, no, they do it to other people. They do it to other people all the time. They stopped doing it to us for like three months. Like where they didn't give us any dings. We're doing the same show. Right. I don't know any other way to do this. You gotta sit down and talk shit. It's the only way to do it. Right. If I change that for somebody that's gonna censor something or I'm gonna lose money, like what are you talking about? I can't change what I do. No. I'm just zero interested in doing that. Yeah. You know, and if I don't think it's offensive, then that's it. That's the end of the conversation.

2:27:15And I think you're pretty sensitive. Yeah, I'm sensitive. I try to be sensitive about these kind of things. It's just... You gotta let people talk. And just because people disagree with you, it doesn't mean there's something wrong with them. Did you see that clip? He was the way he was phrasing it was actually kind of funny. He was talking about white frailty or white anxiety that it's a public health crisis that white people who vote Republican, it's just like an opioid epidemic. This guy was comparing to you. Here, I'm gonna put... You wanna say this to you, Jamie? I don't know where this is.

2:27:50I don't know where he said this. I just saw it on Twitter. And I'm like, man, you gotta get out of the house. You gotta go hang out with some different folks. They don't have an opioid epidemic. There's a lot of people that are... The conservative people that are like really clear thinking people. Absolutely. Yeah, they just... They think this is a mess and they want things to change. They want the rule of law put back in place. It doesn't mean they're on opioids. Oh, you were right now. This is so crazy to say that everybody who doesn't agree with you is on drugs. Well, you know, that gets fired back both on both sides.

2:28:26Now you're in a stupid war. You're stupid. No, you're stupid. You're being on drugs. Who brought back name calling? Yeah. I don't know. If you had been taught equality from the beginning, you wouldn't be flipping out. But that's how hegemonic dominance works. And so I think that's why it happens. And we have to be willing to talk about that. Because it's really unhealthy. This white anxiety is a public health crisis in that regard. And that's why, you know, not only we were talking about another room a minute ago before we came in here. You know, that it's not just the opioid crisis that we think about.

2:28:56With folks killing themselves disproportionately, increasingly, white working class folks who are, you know, using heroin or using over the counter opioids. But they're political opioids turning to a candidate who says you vote for me. And I will take away your pain. I will bring back those jobs. I will make your life better. That's a form of an opiate as well. So we got to be honest about about the dysfunctinality and the real danger of the front lash, back lash, whatever we want to call it. Even for the people who are, you know, thinking they're going to benefit from it. What you see right there is a wild instance of someone that's used to being around like a certain type of people to think a certain type of way.

2:29:34Right. And then you get so, okay, everyone is going to go along with a bigger forum. And you put that out there to the world. And the whole world is like, what the fuck are you talking about? What are you talking about? They're not opioids. What are you saying? And why are you dressed like that? You shouldn't even have an opinion. That doesn't bother me at all. He's dressed like ED. I mean, would dress in a casual setting. Let me see it again. I didn't even think about how he's dressed. I just thought about what he was saying. It's just dressed like a very good guy. It's paramilitary. No, it's very, it is.

2:30:10It's like car -hearted shirt. No, sure. That guy doesn't look paramilitary at all. Run white. Maybe I saw it in his eyes. I don't know.

2:30:41Well, it is kind of a very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very very, very, though, in the past, They're attacking you.

2:32:42They're attacking you. You take it very personally and people are receptive about the way they phrase things in order to try to win and it's entirely because their self -worth is connected to this verbal jousting that they're doing which is Both productive and unproductive at the same time It does allow you sometimes to find out if things are bullshit But on the other hand, it's not smart. It's not a smart way to communicate because most people are in the middle on everything Most people just want the world to be a safer place you want your kids to go to nice schools You want your favorite to be safe?

2:33:17You want people to make money? You want the economy to do well? You don't want to do war. Yeah Yeah, that's that's the most important shit and we want to be balanced and we want it to work Right, you know for as many people as possible leave me the fuck alone Don't tell me what to do you know have laws in place to keep people from getting fucked over But take your fucking hands off approach, but as soon as what people don't understand is as soon as you start Developing all these different areas of business and of life that have to be adjusted You have to be adjusted and that's like you know putting Like DEI initiatives and doing these different things We're not gonna how the most qualified people you're gonna hire people You want to hire a certain percentage of people from this part of the world and a certain percentage of people from that It's like what you're even if you think you're doing better for the world what you don't recognize is that this is a pattern of control And this pattern of control that can be used to manipulate people to thinking they're doing something good socially Which they may very well be what it really does is allows control of businesses in a new way and it allows Control of public perception in a new way that can be manipulated to get you to do certain things and get you to allow certain Legislation to get passed that has the government have much more control over what you do or what you say and how much money they get and money for programs And it's you're locked into a system now and if you want to be a good person you have to follow this pattern sure That's where things get squirrely and so as soon as people start telling people how they can and can't talk this book's got to be gone You can't say that you can't teach this as soon as that happens and the government steps in we're fucked We're fucked because if they step in they're not going to do it for you within your best interest They're going to do it in whatever way makes them the most money or cost them the least Well, there you know that Something's got to keep this herd going in the right direction, you know, I think it's much better and So let's just go back to that answer one day one day one day one day mushroom off for the whole yeah Well, eventually that organism will just take over everything It's really grows well and it'll be it'll just get in your shoes and and it'll balance everything out everything will make sense Yeah, you know what'll happen it'll get Airborne The spores will get airborne so getting to fix every problem we've ever had that's what we need That's what we need our isha fear created shroomfest and if he was more ambitious That would be the number one festival in the world.

2:35:44He was more ambitious. I would have heard of it for sure It's just an unofficial thing. I'm joking around. I'm all for it July of every year This place is now where you can go. It's actually legal especially you go right is it I believe Colorado decriminalized it And I think Portland essentially decriminalized almost everything yeah I think or is it Oregon in total decriminalized almost everything or is it just Portland? I think the gloves are often Portland you do whatever you want to yeah Some lady some lady who was uh, no she's either running for office or she's Oregon's first in nation -law the green but decriminalized possession of small mouths of heroin cocaine and other illicit drugs In favor of an emphasis on addiction treatment is facing strong headwinds the progressive state after an explosion of public drug use fueled by the proliferation of fentanyl Oh my god They flooded the streets Yeah, it's gotta be uh, it's gotta be legal and free Let's that's the only answer.

2:36:50It's gotta be completely legal and it's gotta be no cost to you And that the only thing that's gonna make it less profitable which is what drives the whole thing anyway You got to give it away You got to do what the Japanese did to us with television says flood the fucking market choke them out That's what you got to do you want to die over to heroin over to fucking go you go buddy We got too many of us anyway fucking take you make the decision Not a lot of people make the decision to fucking do it. You gonna run for president. I'm not I'm not and listen once you become a pastor people believe you more right.

2:37:23I know I know I know what I know it's good at it I know I could do that's what I'm saying wrong start pastor when you're here You know spring chicken compared to Biden we can try you out in a couple of years are like fine polishing right? We start we start the Christian con no come on church start the church get that all So we have a decided Christian. We just said we're an old dog big. I think Scientology That's what I was gonna say Ron get him a look. I'm down with your crazy. I can be I can be my back Right that's it. I can be that's the way it really works comedic Tom Cruise I can hang in there for you I could say less we're gonna need celebrities.

2:38:00That's for sure. I know it sounds crazy on paper because everybody believes it But once you experience it and you realize the feet and so real have you ever seen the South Park animation of what Scientologists believe? Yeah, I think I have I have the you know those guys just crank me up There's nobody laughs me make me laugh like those guys there the tip of the spear in the culture war South Park is the tip of the spear in the culture war they go after everybody forever and they get away with it because it's a cartoon Right, and it's a super unrealistic looking cartoon Right grandfather. Yeah, there's no way you could ever think it was real and they're genius and the characters never get old That's the most amazing thing best I watch it all the time When you have a cartoon it doesn't even look remotely real that character can be that forever There's no timeline.

2:38:44They're in they're in school for the rest of their fucking life That's the only constant in my life is South Park I can get 24 hours a day and a fear factor Fear factor comes on my television Every time I turn it on it automatically goes straight to fear factor and And you have to turn it off before something happens that you go oh God That's lyrus but and I don't know why it's a deal they made with Samsung on these TVs But that's what it goes to it no matter what you were watching before Whatever you turn it off turn it back on Fear factor. Yeah, I got a Samsung TV in the gym and when I turn it on it goes right to Hell's Kitchen every time So he's house.

2:39:23I just want man I don't know maybe it's like if you set it on a channel at one point in time it just goes back to that channel Maybe that's I don't know but I'm on the Hell's Kitchen channel where Hell's Kitchen plays 24 hours a day on my Samsung TV What soon did I turn it on? Before I go to ESPN plus Right. Yeah. No, that's what mine does. It does it with a fucking fear factor. I would have like such a terrible opinion I just sit around thinking all those girls were pretty hot but I mean that the fear factor like everyone would look good. Do you jerk off while you watching fear? I don't I don't don't be not every time I want to be involved not every time I gotta be in the something else I do have happened and then you know fear factor just got in the way Gordon Ramsey if I didn't know any better.

2:40:07I think he's the meanest guy on earth because every time I turn on the TV he's yelling at somebody right every time Every time he's fucking screaming and yelling at people because that's the stick like you could develop a very bad reception But he's not like that in real life. Do you know I'm in real life? I don't know can't be Someone to beat the fuck out of him by now. Right. I think people have I think he's prick I think you know that's I think that's the word on the street. What's the word on the street? He's a prick kind of a prick. I think to be great. I've never met him either I could be the nice guy like a plate of butter.

2:40:38I bet he's a nice guy. Yeah. He's a great chef great chefs are wild people yeah like people that create great food or they're they're like great musicians or great comics They're wild artists. All right. A different kind of person It is an art. I didn't really appreciate that till I met Bourdain when I started talking to him Especially when after I watched his show I think that's when I first realized it was like oh this is an art form. I was just to think of it as just good food You know that was a guy just I always thought I would be his friend someday you would have been his friend You know I just always thought the guy you know I could watch that guy He just seems so so honest to genuine He's an awesome you into his life, you know you follow him guy.

2:41:19That's great. I didn't I wish I could have set that up. I wish I could have got you guys together He's a great guy Well it's too late now Joe. Yeah man. Do you know I found out Maynard from tool Text me and he goes I guess the celebrity jujitsu matches off And I was like what? Because he used to joke around about like having a celebrity. It's really good But but excuse me by the way maynard just got his black belts and congratulations Maynard Keenan from tool. He's a legitimate black belt. Oh, yeah, like really good at jujitsu I watched him training here with Ron with John Donner her before we did a podcast.

2:41:56He trained right next door at the gym But you know he's like like a really legitimate jujitsu guy There's that's him Oh wow, so Ron white. That's your next move. You did too? To you run white you run white you just I want to bang and you want a band? Do you? No, I don't want a band No, you know what I want to do I want to besides the religion can ask you did you ever do the The show in LA the grand bam comedy jam what it is? What's it? How goddamn goddamn? Yeah, Josh out of my show. Yeah, would you sing? Uh, give me three steps Here's a great you know that electric violin is doing league guitar stuff Oh, it was funny shit and and uh, I think Bill Burr was that night playing drums Bill is a really good drummer.

2:42:46Yeah, he was I was fucking shocked Bill Burr is a really dedicated drummer and I gotta tell you I killed it I practiced it, you know at the time I was with this with this I was with a singer So she helped me get the beats on it with the thing Don't get outside of that because you can't get outside of that. You got to sing it under the isn't I got it So I thought you know nice Nice I'd press the chicks. I think that night fucking you did that's a great song too Any skinned song That's a wild band too, right think about those dirty white dudes in Florida. Yeah, I saw them on the concert when I was a kid You know, it's a in fact, I think it's the same place that Olstein preaches at now really it was uh What was it the Houston I can't even remember the name of it something dome or something call sim Where's he at?

2:43:37I can't think of the name of it. You know why don't you bought that for Jesus? Yeah, what a shot how many six years? I was kind of it's like 16 ,000 16 ,000 for Jesus But I don't know that 12 million Joel Olstein Houston's compact center. Yeah, wow No, this was another step. Well the church spent 90 million to renovate it They spent 90 on it they got it for 12 and they spent 90 How dope is no one know whether they want They didn't let him in And he literally said something about they had just Look at this and these people that's why and you know be basically preach preachers. It's okay to be It's okay to be rich and these people in that thing they're like that's what I want to hear I want to hear it's okay for me to have my look at the pie and I don't have to feel guilty for it and by God I'm white and I don't you know, I'm not that they're all white, but what is that?

2:44:36I'm wrong. I'm just saying that That my my religion is gonna be different. What are you gonna do you gonna be poor? I'm not yeah, that's what I'm saying. No, no, no, no, no If you need the guy with 90 cars, but still be delivering the real shit, that's the thing Yeah, I don't have 90 cars. You don't need three. I got three cars 90 cars is like 90 cars. You have to keep like fixed If you keep changing oil and pay insurance on them. What do you do? I got it That's too many it's too many roles roises But if you're just gonna be some high ball or guru type character Connected to the god force of the universe That guy used to you should have it all he still give people orgasms For his look at there Didn't he give people orgasms when they touch on their temples and shit He could do some wild if somebody could do that to me.

2:45:27I would follow him anywhere I think he could do it if you could fucking I would care who was well I was gonna do that. I'd if that frog could do it. I would follow that frog That the the cult that you made me buy the building that guy did that to people he gave him orgasms He did yeah, yeah, the guy was he's a hypnotist It's a great Dr. Manor. It's called holy hell People yeah hypnotize them and then he changed his name his name was Jaime Gomez But that was like nobody's gonna go for that. That's like a boxer on a card of a canelo fight right? So he changed his name to Michelle and then he changed it again when he moved to Texas He moved to Texas because the cult awareness net where they were already on his hand on them They were on his ass and after Waco they were cracking down like Fuck enough of this shit after Waco.

2:46:20They were like this is crazy These people have guns and just fucking everybody's wives and there's stockpile and food and preparing for a war a Christian war and shooting it Copsy. Yeah, nothing scarier than that ground. Oh, that's scary When you get that apocalyptic preacher guys will it line there with a bullet singing a song for everybody Really believes in that that's a death cult. That's the he wants to go down on a blazer glory He wants to be martyred that's the scariest there. There's a scaryness to that for sure That's a weird thing, huh so many people go down that road Of either starting one or believing in one.

2:46:54It's like a natural inclination that people have to just follow You always have to do is look at what Jim Jones was able to pull off and other people Complete complete complete control. I thought all those people to the point where they killed himself I thought that was the case. I think some of the people were forced into it now now that I read it into it more It seems like some of the they were forced they were forced to go to Jones time. No, but they may have been forced I used to think they all just died on purpose, but now I think a bunch of them were forced into doing it You know, there's probably when he when there's a masked death There's probably got to be a few reluctant people.

2:47:29Yeah, it's right at the end going it. Yeah, I didn't know you were But this is serious this dude when the cult awareness network was after him He moves to Austin and then has his followers build him that theater so you can dance in front of them the videos on long I know that videos are incredible. Yeah, he's a really good dancer Better better than me. It was really good. These beautiful two this one in his room Yeah, good looking guy until later when he had all the surgeries Are getting old? Yeah, you got to couldn't deal with it. You got to let age come man Well, are you are guru or are you a dude who's hypnotized in people and butt fucking them right?

2:48:04Well, this is how we find out what it's when you age Right, which is legal It was doing everything above ground. I don't know if he had a pay taxes like that's the question Were they an established religion? Because the only person that I know of that it's actually I know people have done it But the only person I personally know of is Alex Gray the visionary artist from New York. Do you know who he is? No, he Actually put together a real church. It's a church of his art Is it the was you called the chapel of sacred mirrors? What does he call it again? Is that it? So he has this insane art structure that's in the woods in upstate New York and Alex I'm know you've seen Alex Gray's work before.

2:48:45I'm sure I'm sure it's all visionary psychedelic DMT type things like that. Look this is his work Show his building Jamie because the bill No, and I'm saying the outside of the building because the outside of the building like the front doors are all 3d Printed works of his art. That's the inside. It's fucking incredible looking. That's what it looks like That's what it looks like on the outside of it. I mean This is also 3d. This is this is the yeah, this is the CGI But it does look like that now, right? That's right. This is a picture of that with that thing on top right You see that I would I think there's some other perspectives Maybe there's some other photos.

2:49:23They'll show different there it is like this is oh no This is the bullshit version just with the front of their website. I think there is some imagery somewhere of the front But whatever it is like this guy has a legit church So he has actually gone through all the steps to create a church worship him? No No, no, no, no, they just worship his art I would be speaking out of turn if I said what they worship. I think it's more of the psychedelic experience and it's most Pure and loving form if I had a if I'd have like boil it down to what they believe in That's what Alex Gray believes in and all of his art.

2:50:04This is all like these Sacred trip to mean type images. I mean, he's like the only guy that I've ever seen that captures like certain aspects You know this guy. Yeah, yeah, he's been on the podcast before he's really cool. No shit. Yeah, really cool guy And his wife is really cool too. She's been on here as well and like look at all of his work. It's like It's amazing stuff, but he's got a real church. This is the only guy that I know that's actually made a real church What I'm like, oh, I believe him I believe him That's not a guy who's trying to Joel Olstein and he's not trying to buy 98 Bentley's right That's really who he is.

2:50:38He's just a real fascinating artist There's a bunch of people that have Alex Gray tattoos. It's probably like one of the most great guy Yeah, the gray hair guy with the ponytail. Yeah, sweetheart of a guy Wow So that's an example of like this tax status down there at the church It's a good question. I think he got it through. I think it's a legitimate church Non -profit organization formed 1996 to create a permanent public exhibition of the sacred mirrors Um, but I think they got like a tax exempt status Yeah, no established in 2008 as an interfaith church Wow, yeah, so from 2008, I guess this You have to have a doctrine that well here it is.

2:51:21Well, it says I'm sure they do. I just don't know what it is Provides unique creative events and workshops and a spiritual context like what is there? What is the do they say what they believe? This is I'm on their vision page, right? What is it? Okay? What are we quote scroll above that so I can read the text. I mean, I would join just so I can hang out there You know, it's a place of contemplation worship for community honoring the practice of art as a spiritual path Cosm's site and structure provides a living bottle of the ideals expressed through the inspiring artwork of the collection And the exhibitions the writings of the founders and invited contributors So they just take cool artists and their art and they show it to people and They're their spirituality is based on creativity.

2:52:05Ah, and it's amazing aren't man. It's stuff is fantastic Where is it New York somewhere in New York? Um like New York State a wapinger wapinger New York. Oh Yeah, I think I'm in Syracuse. I want to pretend to wear anything just go there. Maybe he's got a course. How to start a cult? I got a bus. Yeah, just go down there and go look. I'm gonna start my own thing The you know chapel of sacred he's in ha ha's He may have classes Isn't like comedy kind of a form of religion in some way It is for us Joe. It is it is You know, it's uh you You you find I mean just making people laugh is a good thing to do.

2:52:45It's a great thing to do It's fun and I can't tell you how grateful people are you know that It's just how hard we make them laugh, you know that they it's just so much fun to do if you can even remember Yeah to be somebody that wasn't a comedian watching a comedy show and how hard you can laugh At you know at that experience when you know just I remember I saw a sign fell one time and in a comedy club, you know And he had full blown chops and it was all never heard it before he beat me to death. I mean to death at the Whatever the improv in Dallas, Texas I had a table right off the we was my birthday I don't know been doing stand up for about six months.

2:53:28I wasn't in the show. It's getting the chair He was making 25 ,000 for the week and we were like no fucking way And the crew nobody makes that much money in the world Yeah, doing it stand up at a club and this is the 90s right They used that to be 86 I saw a sign fell for the first time in 88 Before I did stand up like right before I did stand up. I was probably maybe 87 It was at the paradise which was a comedy club in it was like us It was a big place. It was connected to stitches So stitches was the comedy club and that was small I think it's seat it would see about 150 or so and then the paradise which next door was bigger But it only sat like maybe 500 people.

2:54:15I'm just guessing four or 500 people and so sign fell was there And I took him with this girl that I was dating and just fucking cried couldn't believe how smooth he was So it was so so fun to see back then, you know, he was doing Yeah, all those sets, you know, all those sets every night. He's the one that said, you know A comic should be on stage. I heard him say it with every single day and uh and that you know Yeah, he's got crazy work. That's the reason I tried to stay on stage every single day was because what sign fell to that Yeah There's something to that for sure But I remember back then like thinking about doing stand up like oh my god I could never do this and then going to an open mic and go oh I can do this like the difference Crazy people bomb like oh rich or Jenny said it best.

2:55:02He said terrible comedy gives people inspiration to try comedy That's what this the purpose it serves right. I could for sure do that. He was a guy. I got to see live A quite a few times. Yeah, but I got to see him before us Maybe I had just done an open mic or two, but I was sitting front row at catch rising star and Cambridge And he was doing the weekend there god damn he was good. There was nobody better than him I don't think it is big as peak it was just so much power so much writing so smooth and so many tags And she's like just a consummate professional consummate professional Like he was just a joke writing machine He could take any premise any premise and turn it into a closing bit right crazy And it was that's what it was like watching somebody had nothing but closing bits That's hard you laughed at this show.

2:55:50I've told this before but I'll tell it again just because it's so crazy Eastside comedy club in Long Island. Um, I I went there the I don't know if I was there on Sunday or I was there after Jenny shows were done So when I got there the fucking host was depressed and we were all talking like what's the matter? He goes Jenny did a different hour every show He goes he did two different hours on Friday and then two different hours on Saturday any fucking killed And the guy was like I want a quick comedy like what am I doing the fuck am I doing this guy just did four different hours and murdered That's crazy crazy.

2:56:23I should quit You watch something like that like I mean he was like He just people just forgot that's one of those ones like I know Chris Rock is up to him some Well, he he definitely raised the bar. He definitely raised the bar. This guy. I saw him kill at the comedy works in Montreal remember that little room that little tiny room was serious. Oh, yeah, I saw him kill up there talking about buying a Corvette How do you make that funny? How do you make buying a Corvette funny? I have no idea. It was hilarious He was murdering he was a murderer. He gets anything any subject. He could find it find the angle.

2:57:04Yeah I remember the one thing he did it was just about a look in his eye that whenever he Did all he did was move his eyeball and he showed you how far he moved his eyeball and that's how the fight started with his wife And but it was just it real insightful and then it was so subtle that it you know It was just so expertly fucking done that it just killed me. Yeah, he's one of the fucking killed me Yeah, he was one of the grades. I gotta write something down. I forget Yeah, it's it's just so interesting think about the guys that inspired you when you first started doing stand -up You know when you first started like what that was like to see someone who was really good at this thing That was just like it was that's a weird foggy dream and the first couple times you go on stage like how does anyone ever really become a professional And then you watch a master go up and murder and then you realize he's not Nobody yeah Yeah, there guys that make him look like a you know Like he doesn't know what he's doing.

2:58:09Yeah But you know I you're you kind of have a realm of comedy of what you can see and And then boss and that would have been a much bigger Glimps than you would get in Arlington, Texas. Oh, yeah You got whatever headlaters came through the funny bone chain and they were all great You know, they all killed everybody and nobody really Went on to do her tremendous Business that box worth the in me and Dan and yeah The book collarboys There wouldn't a lot of guys well you guys over the door for a lot of new guys that came after you though A lot of guys were inspired by that for sure I hope so but it's like you need a community You know and Boston had a crazy community they had a community of assassins that were local guys And then new people were coming in every week.

2:58:57They were like big national headliners So you'd have all these murderous local guys and then Domira would fly in for a weekend You know bill Hicks would fly in for a weekend. They had all the like road killers like whenever a big national act Was killing it on the road. They would stop at Nick's comedy stop. We'd all watch them So they had the whole thing it was like a perfect training ground for learning how to do stand up They never gave a fuck about me It's like a bigger you know, but that's always how it is there was too many people there Yeah, they that's what they had guys it was like Denver You know you didn't ever never gave a fuck about me But I would look at their list of headliners ago, you know, we got Louis Anderson They got all these you know big name fucking comics And I went to big name fucking comic and I didn't but they didn't belong on that list Yeah, it's just it is what it is But you have to have a scene like that You know, that's where that's where like talent emerges from and that's what's been really fucking cool about being able to do that here Is that to take this place that had a scene there was an Austin comedy scene Reason why came here is the Reserted Club here it went under during the pandemic right it still existed sure And it was always a fun place to work and then to have all of that you were here first So you were the one before I the pandemic even hit you were already here And you were telling me I fucking love it.

3:00:14I was like team it from white loves. It's got to be something to it And you were like is I'm reasonable. I fucking love it. I fucking love it's not too big not too small everybody's cool My god damn it and I had already thought about it before because of on it You know because the the business is here and I'd have to come down to do stuff occasionally anyway And I was always coming down to stand up anyway, and I always loved being down here But it wasn't until the pandemic and it wasn't until you getting on stage that one time when you get on stage You haven't you hadn't got on stage and fucking forever and you grab me by the shoulder You grab me you go we are gonna fuck it do this whatever it takes you to open up that club right I meant it too.

3:00:53I know you did I'm that and still do to this fucking day. I'm behind that 100 % you know my effort and I talk about that club on the you know on the road and my shows and just how much you know How much it means to me now cool it is it means to me too. Yeah, it means you to me because you're there too It's it's everybody together in this is of really exciting camaraderie. It's a great tribe and And fun and we're that's we're blessed to have it. Yeah, it's very cool But you saying that to me that day. I mean, I was gonna do it anyway for sure But that was an extra fucking turbo gear. I was an extra kick in the pants.

3:01:27I was like let's go I made it some extra phone calls Try to close it up figure out what the problem was it was just we had a big adjustment for moving from the old place to the new place That was a big pain the ass because we had spent a considerable amount of time and effort You know architects were involved and drawing up plans and people would gone to look at it and then and when they all fell through And like fuck we got to start from scratch. Yeah, but and everybody blame me Well people didn't believe it. That's what was funny But that's also it makes it more fun when it does open because people like he's never gonna do it like okay Just sit back.

3:02:02Yeah, right. I've got some crazy plans I hear you say you're gonna do something. I just Yeah, how long that gonna be it's gonna happen quick Yeah, I would have happened it would have happened quick. We would have had this place open probably inside of It was perfect It happened a lot of anticipation from all of us. It made us all nervous The fact that even with all that anticipation, it still gets an A right still gets an A like I know it's my place But shut the fuck up. Yeah, the place is perfect. Yeah, it's perfect The place is perfect. We made it perfect and we got lucky that we got the right people and the right architect shot out to Richard The people that put it together did an amazing job and it's also like the vibe there is so strong.

3:02:47It's very fun It's real positive. Well, you know, we all feel like it's ours and even though you you pay all the bills Well, it pays the bills now they up So and you know people don't know that 80 % of the door from the go to goes to the comics and so there's also no opportunity for a comic to make money That kind of money in a local gig at home anywhere on the fucking planet earth that opportunity does not exist Well, it's not I would never do it if I was gonna do it for money. I would never do it though. That's crazy I wouldn't make any sense you're making this money Yeah, I decided to get in the comedy club business.

3:03:23Oh wow I didn't get in the comedy club business. I got in the business of making comedy and and having a place for comedians That was the business was my idea was set up the ideal spot And what's the ideal spot? Well the ideal spot was that the comedians would get the bulk of the money because the comedians doing all of the work They're the ones who have to come up with the jokes that the way if we don't have the comedians We're just selling drinks right like this is nonsense So like it's obvious like what people they have I knew that when I started getting a percentage of the door right new Outworks, but like that should be that way regardless like that's the real relationship You're selling what we do right you shouldn't be getting 80 % of the money 80 % of the money should be going to the comedians That's crazy.

3:04:08There's so much money from booze you sell money and alcohol you sell money and there's still money You can tell the guy that owns the place doesn't give a shit a better turn to profit my idea is just don't don't lose my I speak even you know I'm a I'm a hundred percent out of board. Yeah, it's great That's how it should be and it's and if you do it that way then It's really like deeply and there's a commitment to this idea like we're all committed to this idea Just making the most fun possible the most comedy possible do our best have a great community have a great tribe Have a great vibe. We're all feeding off each other and talking shit to each other and having a good old time in the back And then it fuels us to go on stage.

3:04:47We're watching each other from the balcony. It's exciting. Yeah, it is very exciting It's the funnest thing ever. I'm very happy you're part of it. I'm glad you're brother. Thank you Thank you. It's it's great. I love being part of the fucking team. I love you having you here, man I love everybody. I'm gonna headline the room Tuesday night. I think the 10 o 'clock show beautiful. Are you doing the seven o 'clock? Yeah, I'm doing the seven o 'clock show. I'll come do it. Okay. All right, man. All right, man. All right, man You