#2305 - Rich Vos

28:27I go, how does she ask that question? She knows you. Yeah, I know. She should know you can't. She's fucking with you. Well, she knows you can't. She should say good for you. That's a good point. She says they're good for you. That's smart. But she didn't know me when I was an addict. She never saw me when I was out there. Yeah, but I, well, I guess I did. I knew you when you were an addict, but you cleaned up nice. You really did. You figured it out well. You really did. So she should know that. Yeah, not to code it. It's the most important. That's what I'm trying to say. How about that, Bonnie?

29:01You know what? That's what I'm trying to say. I mean, you guys are one of the funniest couples of all time, though. That's like a few like Christina Pizzis, Gintam's, Gura, Natasha Ligero, Moshakashir. There's a few like, you know, people say like comics shouldn't day comics. Well, I don't know about that because sometimes it fucking works really well. What am I going to do? Come home to a dentist, you know, and for me, you know, we, you know, we really come together when we find the same enemy and the same person we could trash. You know, or we talk comedy, we make each other laugh. Yeah, we fight and have all the fucking, you know, or of course, and your comics.

29:43Yeah. And we're so, so you talking shit. Well, to be a male comics, you got to be fucked up. To be a female comic, that's a whole nother level of fucking up because, you know, they go on a road. They got to worry about everything or females. Yeah, they got to worry about fans and acting where they're staying. Right, right. What it's like, it's shocked. Oh, yeah, it's horrible. And thank you for saying we're funny. Yeah, we together. You guys are very funny. It's like, you know, I was using this example because comics will say all the time, don't day comics. And I'm like, I don't know about that.

30:21I don't know about that because like, why not? I don't think you should never date. Where? Although I stopped dating Italians when I was 21. Oh, yeah. Yeah, it's just like the last one swung at me. I was like, I'm done. Well, I only date. I was swinging. I was like, I can't believe she's swinging at me. That's hilarious. Like, while this was happening, her arm was pulling back. It was coming towards my face. Like, I can't fucking believe this is happening. Well, I only date Irish. Like, I can't afford a Jew broad. So I went, I went fucking Irish. I rather go to fucking Marshall's and Barnes. Well, also like, you probably, well, the thing about Jewish women, the stereotype.

31:01Is that they're very controlling. Yeah, you know, it's like how the mom is. You know, it's like you take that role of like the mom of the house, then your wife becomes your mom. That's the stereo. Yeah. I'm not saying it's always that way. Very little naggy. Little naggy. You know, yeah. And I mean, look, fucking Bonnie grew up on a farm killing chickens. You know, perfect. She's fucking, I, you know, when the revelation comes. And not only that, I have running water. You know, they had a fucking night stuff time to floor. She grew up like I do poor. Poor. And we started dating. I mean, I was already in the business for, I don't know how many years.

31:42It's like they say, don't date comics. Yeah, well, if you're a new comic and they're a new comic, it's going to be competition the whole time. It's going to be jealousy. But I was already established and she was established. Yeah, but it doesn't have to be. It doesn't have to be. It could be. But it doesn't it like these, these like hard fast rules, they don't work. It all completely depends on the individual. I mean, how different are comics? Like how different are you to Shane Gillis? How different am I to Archevier? Like we're all different. Even though we're all real good friends, we're all, there's no hard rules.

32:17No. I luckily came up with the one of the strongest crews in New York. Oh, you came up with it in May. In May. You know, from Patrice. Patrice, Norton, Billy, Bobby, Colin, you know, Kevin, you know, Kevin Hart. It was in May. It was in crew. You know, our crew and, you know, the body hump. I don't know. I knew you back when you had Jericho. You knew me when I was doing Robin Gibbons bits. You know, that's right. You don't remember. You might remember. We were working on One Nighter in Seaside, New Jersey. It was my ex -wife. And me and her took a walk to the boardwalk. We were in Seaside right on the boardwalk.

33:04And it was just me and her. I think you just came down from Boston. And I don't think you were living in New York. If you were just doing some shows. Some One Nighter's in shit. And we did on One Nighter. Okay, I probably first got, it had to be, I got 39 years with her. Probably like 38 years ago. I was just, it didn't make sense because I've been doing comedy for 30. Let me see. 37 years. Okay, so then, okay, I was with Bonnie. So, yeah, I mean, Kelly. So I had, you're right. I had, I had, I'd be like 1990 then. Yeah, I had like four years clean. 90 was when I first started coming to New York.

33:48You were already clean by then? Yeah, yeah. And I was already married. So yeah, I had five years clean, so it was maybe like 34 years ago. Which could fall, or 35. So yeah, we're working on One Nighter. And I remember walking up to street, me, you and Bonnie. It was to the boardwalk. I mean, Kelly, Kelly to the boardwalk. And it was just someone nighter. And then, I don't know if we ever worked again together. Oh, well, danger fields. We did some stuff. We did care. We did a lot of danger fields shows together. Yeah, we did, we ever do prom shows together? Yes. Oh, Jesus. And no, they should know what prom shows are.

34:35So New York has a very weird thing. Where they take kids from like Staten Island and Brooklyn. And they bring them in and fucking buses to danger fields. And the show would run from like 7 p .m. till 5 in the morning. No break. No break. Just you would go one show and you get paid by the show. It was like, it was good money. I forget what it was like. You get paid, but like you made a couple grand in a night. If you did the whole night. So you would do stand up from 7 p .m. to like 5 a .m. But sometimes some of the shows were the same, some of the same crowd. Most of the shows. Yeah, yeah, they didn't move the people out.

35:14They just pushed new kids in. And they wanted you to do the same jokes so that the kids would leave. It's the best time to be a basketball fan. All the thrills and playoff drama, done sitting in the sideline and ready to win some real cash. Well, check out Pick Six from DraftKings. When it comes to basketball playoffs, DraftKings Pick Six posterizes the competition. Including prize picks. When you hit all your picks, you'll score higher minimum payouts on Pick Six than Flex plays on prize picks. And best of all, you'll win even more cash if you outscore the competition. Track your picks for a shot at huge cash prizes.

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36:33Gamaling problem called 1 -800 -Gamberler. Help is available for problem gambling called 888 -7897777 or visit ccpg .org in Connecticut. Must be 18 and over. Age and eligibility restrictions vary by jurisdiction. Pick Six not available everywhere, including New York and Ontario. Void were prohibited. One per new customer. Bonus awarded as nonwithdrawable Pick Six credits that expire in 14 days. Limited time offer. See terms at Pick Six .DraftKings .com slash promos. So we were doing proms at Dangerfield. And this is all young kids. And you know, get ready to go to call. And Ronnie goes on. He walks on stage in a robe drunk.

37:13He's not doing comedy. He's bombing the crack. He's talking about his divorce or death. And all these kids are just, they're all looking at him like the jury from my cousin Vinnie. When they were looking at the stuttering lawyer, their eyes were just going, what is going on with this man? Right. And he just, it was the most depressed. And then I think Brian Regan had to follow him. And the fact, I mean, if you look at your career and some of mine and Brian Regan, we were doing prom shows. Yeah. I did, I did, there was a contest at Rascals. And I think the winner got to do comedy on a plane. That was back when they smoked on play.

38:05And I think John Stewart was one in a contestant. Like I remember doing, I remember doing, or else it was a Johnny Walker competition. I was there. It was like me, John Stewart, Jim Gaffigan, you know, to do some Johnny Walker tour, I don't fucking know whatever the contest was. But it was all these contests. But you would see, look, I worked fucking clubs. I was working one club once. And after the show, it was in Scranton, PA at a holiday and meeting another comic. After the show, the owner brings us in the back room and pulls out a gigantic bag of Coke and says, you want Coke or money? And I took the Coke.

38:52And the guy who took the money is Adam Sandler. And look where he is. And look where I am. Adam Sandler took the money at Old Money. He opened up, he was a guitar comic. And he opened up. That was the next comedy stop thing, Coke or money. Oh yeah, I worked at Boston. Did they offer you Coke or money? I don't, and I was getting high because when I first started comedy somehow, what was his name? Dominic and Jackie Giminer -Sumton. They liked me for some reason. Nice stunk, but they would give me spots at Nix. And I would get either money, but I would buy Coke from Mike, the drug dealer that the Colombians killed.

39:32He was the Coke dealer up there. I would stay behind a connection at the Milner Hotel, which was all prostitutes and drug addicts. And I would go up there, Nix was giving me those upstairs, downstairs. So the one time, the last time I was up in Boston, I did Springfield Mass and Westfield Mass, 252 L, and some other Norm Lafayot shit. Norm Lafayot? Western Massages. Yes, yes. So then I went to Nix. I go, I'm not spending my money on drugs. I'm coming home with fucking money, right? So I'm working this place called Plums in Worcester, and this waitress, oh fucking smoking hot. After the show, because I did some Coke bits, she goes, you do Coke?

40:25I go, yeah. I go, I go, I go. Do you know where I can get any Coke? And we couldn't get any Coke in Boston. We drove from Boston, I went back to New York, bought a bunch of crack. We got a hotel smoked all night, we had sex, this and that. And it was Saturday night, and I'm 40 minutes from home, and I have one more show in Boston on a Sunday, and I have to drive her all the way back to Boston. No money left, maybe $10 or $20. Just enough to get back to Boston, do my show, luggage in a fucking paper bag, we stop on the way up in Hartford, we try to buy Coke or heroin, and we got ripped off. She's crying because she's gonna lose her job.

41:23Fucking blood started pouring out of my nose as we're driving. Just pouring out of it. Oh, she lost her voice. I swear to God, right? Right. Well, and then she goes, my sister wants an ounce of Coke, so I was gonna set her up and rip her off, and you know, get a free ounce of Coke. Well, anyhow, two weeks later, I end up in rehab. That was my bottom, that fucking truck to Boston, I end up in rehab, and about a year or two later, I'm working for Loderdale, and her sisters there, with her boyfriend, who's the size of a fucking house. So if I did rip her off, I would've gotten fucking a shit kill, being out of me, you know, Loderdale odds.

42:14So that last trip to Boston, and I spent all the money I wasn't gonna spend, but this girl was fucking hot. You know, then I came out of rehab, and I think I had like a month or two months clean, and I'm working on a Daytona Beach. There's fucking weight. Well, I don't know, I had bad teeth, fucking Jerry Curl, and my wife says that, she saw videos of me from her ass, and she goes, you're such a mess, but you had so much confidence, and girls like confidence, right, because I would be on stage, a fucking rotten teeth, and fucking grease dripping out of my hair. So I'm fucking mess, I look like a fucking rat, and just hot waitress in Daytona, we go back to her place, and I'm making out with it, and it's something taste funny.

43:06I go, what, she pulls out a bag of coke, and I had like a month clean, two months ago, I can't do that, I gotta get out of here. I'm an eye -bacter, but then I left real quick, you know. You know, and it was scary. So you never bounced back, you never went back to drugs. No, no. That's amazing. 39 years ago. That's incredible. You have one fall off, and you're like, I'm done. Well, I mean, here's for me now, and you know, as a year's accumulated, you know, I was working, I was saving money, I was buying. You know, if I wasn't got high now, this watch alone would kill me. I could point this watch.

43:44Right. It would be enough money for me to die. Right. You know, money I've hidden around the house, you know, no one's gonna find it. I don't even think, hey, we're gonna go to the forest to south and find his money. This shit is fucking hidden well. All right. So go fuck yourself. So anyhow, I'll die. There's no look. For a year, and I gotta get back on track, I stopped eating, not keto, but cut back on carbs, sugar, just, I did real well for a year. I mean, I was fucking ripping up again. And for my age, and it's harder, my daughter comes upstairs and goes, oh, I made homemade chocolate chip cookies.

44:29I'll give me one. Well, the seventh cookie I had thrown to garbage, the seventh one I got to stop. So that's how my fucking mind is. There's no one time to fuck. I play golf and guys are drinking a beer. I go, what the fuck you do? We like to taste fuck off, gatorate tastes good. You drink to get drunk. What are you drinking a beer? You know, and it's just, and on stage, if I go, I quit, someone goes, quit, or shut the fuck up. You're here having wine, coolers, bitch. Sell your mother's car to get high. Go fuck yourself. Wow. You don't know anything about getting high. You're fighting with people aren't even here.

45:06I know. I'm just telling you a strange.

45:11I'm just, I'm just, I'm just, I'm just, I'm having a shower, argue with these guys. Oh, you don't have any fucking arguments I've had. How come you get to bring in your whole pro -Palestinian crew that I was going to fight today? Which I have stuff printed out. We'll read later. We'll read later. But that's a funny, you have in fight, but you don't ever lay in bed or argue with, have arguments with people that, No. You've never had, I did when I was young. Yeah, I figured that out when I was younger. This is stupid. And when the impulse comes, which it does, I just, I go this is stupid. I talk to myself.

45:49I just coach myself. Yeah. You're going to have like another voice in your head. Yeah, but I would. Most people have one voice in their head, and that voice is like, we should go get high, or we should do this, we should do this. You have to have a second voice, and the second voice is like, what advice would I give me? And the advice I give me is like, you're wasting your time arguing in the shower with someone who doesn't even, they don't even know you're arguing with them. No, it's true. You're not even there. You're like replaying it out in your head, so you could have had a better thing to say to them.

46:17They say they're living rent -free in your head. Yes. That's what it is. I don't know how anybody in my head. No, I had the second voice. I do, and I'm not religious by any, but I'll say, you know, God, get me off. What should I do? What's my purpose? Or what can I do in life? Look, my main purpose in life, besides being, my main purpose is staying sober, because if I don't, I'm dead easily, and everything I throw away. Again, my family, obviously, you know, and my career, you know. All the shit I put about Israel is in that. That's my life is comedy. But I think in life, if you're not part of the, like just a solution, you're part of the problem with what's going on in this world, mainly in this country, the anti -Semitism in this country.

47:12The anti -Semitism in this country is weird, because it popped up like it was hiding. You know, after October 7th, it popped up like it was hiding. Like, what? Is this been here the whole time? It was weird. And I think there's a lot of it on Twitter in these places that I think is not human beings, and that inspires human beings to get bold. I think there's a lot of it that's bots. There's a lot of it that's bots. I see these, I've, like, when someone says something outrageous on Twitter, I'll go to the account and see like what they're doing. And sometimes I go, oh, this isn't a person. Like you can figure it out after like a couple of pages.

47:54Like this is not an actual person. This is a person that jumps on to every controversial subject and says something insightful. They do it over and over again. And you see it with abortion, you see it with immigration, you see with voting, you see it with the rigged elections. Like there was an FBI analyst who took a look at Twitter before the purchase and he said, I think it's as much as 80 % bots. I think we're getting played as a civilization back and forth. I think we're getting, I think so many people are vulnerable to like following a narrative. Well, and I, she, and I've said this, and I believe in free speech.

48:38When we talked about this, you didn't agree with it. I didn't agree with free speech. No, no, no. What I said about the internet that some people in life use that plan, shouldn't have a platform in life because they're nuts. They're nuts. Like if you had someone in an audience that's nuts, you're going to take them out. You're going to get rid of them. Right, but that's the difference between an audience and the internet is you don't have to engage with the nuts. Okay, but there's people that are following these things. Okay, you take whatever's going on in the Middle East, whatever, whatever, whatever side you're on, Israel, Palestine, whatever.

49:22Why are college campuses letting this happen on campus where Jews can't go to class, where they're being harassed, where they feel threatened. Well, a lot of that stuff is funded. Yes, funded by Qatar or whatever, or whatever, whoever's doing it, there's most certainly there's funding and organization involved. These aren't organic protests, just pop up. No, of course. Everybody wants to think they are because some people join organically. They hop in, but it's not. No, these are all being organized. Of course, including the anti -Elon protests, including like, you know, the end to all the garkey rallies that they have with AOC and bird centers.

50:06All this shit is getting funded and astroturfed and they're busing people in. They're manufacturing a movement. Of course. And I mean, listen, they didn't all go out and buy the same tents. You know, it's enders, I don't know how many that are getting funded and then they bring in, you know, it's just like the tense of crazy. It's just camp out for Palestine. Yeah, it's just like, you know, I don't want to get into the 80s and four closures on farms. You know, far made. Well, when banks were four closing on farms, Jews were going, look, the Jews are four closing on our farm, the Jewish bankers, and they weren't even the bankers doing it.

50:53It was the Wasp bankers. Jews barely worked at Chase Manhattan in the early 80s or 70s. But they blame the Jews. But they blame because it's easy to go after, you know, that's, so throughout the Midwest or the South, it's easier to build up hatred or a group to go after a smaller group going, hey, these people are closing on your farms. These are the people that are doing it. And these people don't have the knowledge and they hate just grows and grows from generation to generation. That makes sense. So, you know, same with, you know, look, I got shit, I printed out. You know, I'll show later maybe.

51:35I don't know. I mean, listen, I'm a comic, but I, I really, you see what I post sometimes. I post some shit. And it's not, I'm not anti. I'm not anti -pooh. You're pro -ju. I'm just pro -ju. But I'm, you're pro -ju. I'm pro -ju in this country. And I'm not religious by any stretch. I don't fucking, it's, I think it's a holiday now. It's patch over or something. I don't fucking know. I'm not religious. My cousins were. My family wasn't black. You think about it as a people. I think about it as, yes, as a people. You know, if what was happening in this world to black people or gay people, these colleges would put an end to it.

52:15It would stop. All right. If people were ripping down posters of hostages, of black hostages or gay hostages, when that was happening, it wouldn't happen. Yeah, that was crazy. You know, that was crazy where people were upset that people wanted people to bring the hostages home. Like, these hostages, some of them were aid workers. Yeah, some of them were people that, like, lived there so they could help people in Gaza. The whole thing is so crazy. But I wonder, like, how did they get turned that way? Or were they, like, what I said, like, they were in hiding? There was, like, anti -sense. As a person who's not a Jew, I would hear about all the anti -semitism.

52:55I'm like, yeah, there's always going to be some. Yeah. But maybe everyone's exaggerating. But then, when this, after October 7th, it was just like, oh, Jesus. Fucking everywhere. Are you, are you, what's your background? Italian. Yeah, mostly one quarter Irish. Okay. This episode is brought to you by Farmer's Dog. It doesn't matter how old your dog is. It's always a great time to start investing in their health and happiness. And thankfully, the Farmer's Dog makes it easier than ever to feed your dog a healthy diet of real meat and veggies. Dogs prefer their food, even picky dogs, and owners prefer their service.

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54:49Pay for by the American Beverage Association. If every surrounding country is attacked, oh, I get it. You're going to fight back by any means necessary. I'm going to show you some stuff. Okay. Now we don't have to do a little of it. Whatever you want. I don't care. Do whatever you want. I'm joking around. But yeah, no, I understand. And I think that's also one of the things that people like... My wife should keep away. Go ahead. When people get angry about Jews, is because they think that Jews always stick together. And they like Jews above all else. And then it's like, fuck those people. You know, there's like that walled garden approach.

55:30You know? What do you got there? You got a manila envelope like you're in fucking court. Look at this. I'm a... We got all the charts. Did you be in graphs? What's that first page? Is that a photo of Israel? What is... You got a map? You brought maps. He brought maps for me. This is the dumbest shit I've ever seen from you. Look at the size of Israel. Yeah, it's very small. Look at who's our surround part. Yeah, they're surrounded by a bunch of Muslims. Not a good spot to be here, Jew. So, we... They should probably move to a different spot. I'm sure that's right. It's like, you know, you know what I mean?

56:07It's like... No, I got another better stuff. I just start off with the weaker stuff. If you're a black guy, you move into a KKK neighborhood. It's like... You got problems. Yeah, I mean... So... It is that crazy. What do you think by any means necessary, they're going to do what they fucking have to do to survive? Yes. I totally think they would. And I understand that aspect of it. Is that your fun? Yeah, I got to turn it on. Sorry. My wife. I don't know how she got my number. Start the car. It is crazy when you look at the map. It's not just that they're surrounded, but they're surrounded by everyone.

56:46Everyone. It's all enormous countries. I mean, look at that. All the way up. It's interesting that you go down Saudi Arabia at the end of it, you forget. Oh, it's Ethiopia's right there. And then, I mean, Turkey hates Israel. Fucking, I ran, you know, they're being attacked by four or five different nations at once. And everybody's going, well, you know, they're committing genocide. First of all, those numbers are coming out of coming from Hamas. What do you think those numbers are coming from? Okay, but the drone footage isn't coming from Hamas. The drone footage is real. Like if you cover like Gaza with a drone, there's nothing left.

57:25It's pretty nuts. Well, I bet you, if they release the hostages October 10th, you know, they'll say, what happened? What happened? No, they said what happened? During the Clinton administration, Arifat was in the White House probably six or seven times. To head to the CIA, during the Clinton administration, visited the White House twice. Arifat six or seven times. And they offered a two -state solution. Clinton, that would have been Clinton's legacy to have peace and a two -state. But Arifat kept turning it down because Arifat's a terrorist. And if he does that, what purpose does he serve? What purpose?

58:09Is that simple? Well, to me it is, because I'm not the smartest. Part of the problem. Part of the problem with Israel and Palestine. And I've sat down and thought about this conflict. Not that I'm an expert either. But it's almost insurmountable. And then now, after October 7th, with all the bombings, and when they leveled Gaza, it's like, how do you fix this? It's like, there's no, you've created whatever the numbers are. Whether it's 70 ,000 people or 20 ,000 people that have been killed that are innocence. You've created so many more potential terrorists because so many of the children of those people, and the brothers and sisters, and relatives of those people.

58:56So it's like, it's like, reinforced this desire to fight against Israel. But we... You know, and you could squash that. You could just keep pounding them down until there's nothing left, which is what it seems that they're doing. And I understand it from a tactical perspective, I guess. Do we have that animosity and hatred from Japan towards us where we dropped, you know, killed 350 ,000 people? I mean, well, they did for a while. They certainly did for a long while. But now, as friends who'd go to Japan in the 70s and this, you could feel the hatred. But now, it's 55 years later. Yeah, they're not like that at all now.

59:41But it's a totally completely different generation. So you think future generations will think about Israel the same way we think about Japan. Or do you think Japan thinks about us? No, because future generations in the Middle East. This has been going since day one, since the Sixth Day War, since the Yamkhippa War, since day one they've been being attacked. So there's never... Well, it's also before Israel was founded, you got to go back to how they were being persecuted in Europe. It was incest. There's this guy, Darryl Cooper, is a lightning rod for controversy, unfortunately, but he's got an amazing podcast.

1:00:22He's got this series called Fear and Loading in the New Jerusalem. And it starts out with the Jews being persecuted in Europe. And he takes you through what it would like for those people. And the gangs of people roaming down the streets, raping women, beating men to death in the streets. And it's so crazy because it's real. It happened. And it was these people's neighbors. And this was why they got so many people to move to Israel in the first place. Because when they said, look, we're setting up a state for just for Jews, from all these Eastern European Jews who were like, okay, we're in. And they moved.

1:01:02And then, you know... And they've also been there since Christ. I mean, they've been in Israel, Jews. Even before that, right? A couple weeks. But I think it predates. Doesn't it predate Jesus? I mean, I'm not a historian. This isn't my whole life. But let's find out. Let's find out since we can. What is the earliest? When did Jews first settle the land that's now known as Israel? It was Judea back then, right? Like, what was it called? What was it initially called? Miami. But also, yeah. This is like, you know, this is one of the reasons why it's this area is so contentious. It's because Christians really believe that when Jesus comes back, that's where he comes back.

1:01:49He's going back to Jerusalem. Are you fucking sure? But here's another thing too. And I'm not... Listen, I've worked... I'm not going to be that guy. Oh, I had a Muslim friend. There we go. Jews have been a history in the land of Israel that presents dating back to the second millennial BCE. Okay, settling in the area around 1 ,250 BCE. So that predates Jesus by 1 ,250 years. It's funny they call it before current era. Like current era is not 2 ,000 years ago. Just say before Jesus, you motherfuckers. That's what I say. Second millennial BCE, the Israelites, considered to be the ancestors of the Jewish people, emerged as an outgrowth of the Southern Canaanites.

1:02:33Israelites entered Canaan in 1250 BCE, settling the hill country in the south, 10th century BCE, two Israelite kingdoms, northern kingdom of Israel, and the southern kingdom of Judea, emerged. Of Judah, rather, emerged. The kingdom of Israel was conquered by the Neal Assyrian Empire in 722 BCE. And in 586 BCE, the kingdom of Judah was conquered by the Neal Babylonian Empire. 538 BCE, the Persian Cyrus, the Great, ended the Babylonian exile, and the Jews returned to their homeland. So they've been there since 538 BCE, started to 1250 BCE. So they were there before anybody. Yeah. The Romans destroyed the second temple of Jerusalem in 70 current era, leading to the Jewish dysphoria.

1:03:23Wow. Crazy. Fuck a history of controversy in that one place. 48th State of Israel was established. Many Holocaust survivors welcomed it as a homeland. Yeah, 48th and since then, they've been at war. And so they started settling another wave of Jews started coming in 1904, from 1904 to 1914.

1:03:45So, 538 BCE. Yeah, but the problem is, there were Palestinians there. They don't even have a country. If you've got people that are right next to you that don't even have a country, they don't have, you know, what do they do if they're ruled by the Moss? How would they fight back with these? They are protesting in the streets now. They are. They get executed. Did you just see that? Yes. They just saw that. Thousands of courageous people protesting in the street. They're like, we don't want any more of this. Stop. Well, look what happened. They got, they got, I mean, Kusav Israel's help got Assad out of Syria.

1:04:26Now, the rebels took over, but Assad killed almost 500 ,000 of his own people, tortured 100 ,000. I mean, those are the numbers I read. I don't know if they're exact, but he's got a controversial about Assad. Yeah. There's a lot of controversy about what actually happened and why we're rebacking the rebels. We essentially, we essentially backed ISIS, which is crazy. We backed al -Qaeda, which is just nuts. He, but he was more dangerous in Syria. According to Israel. According to Israel. According, well, also according to Israel, because Israel weakened Iran's military after they were attacked by Iran, who was supplying Assad with weapons.

1:05:14It was really fucked before Iran became a religious state. A woman who were wearing miniscares. Yes. It was like, there was freedom everywhere. People were chilling. It seemed almost like Europe. Probably like a resort vacation. They were beautiful. Oh, they were gorgeous women. I read that Persian women of incredible genes. You look at these photos from, like, see if you can find some photos of Iran in the early 1970s. I was seeing some things on it this morning, actually, on the way over here. Or before I left my house, I was seeing this. It's so hard to imagine that a place that had a democratically elected leader, you know, it was kind of almost European.

1:06:03And then now, now it's just a full religious state. Anybody, anybody who protests against the government gets assassinated. Like, they assassinated an Olympic gold medalist wrestler, because he was perceived to be protesting. I don't even know if he actually protested. It was like some things that you've posed online. Like, if women take off their headscarves, they can get killed. But why, I don't get... It's crazy that a country can fall like that. I don't get where gays or women or whatever are backing. They're basically backing Hamas. Yeah. I don't get... They're retarded. I don't get it. Because they just do the new thing.

1:06:43What's the new thing? Is it climate change? Why am I yelling? Climate change? Okay, climate change. Is it just a black lives matter? Okay, black lives matter. It's all it is. There's a lot of people out there that are just retarded. And those are the people that you see getting bust into these rallies. And there's just a lot of dopes that you can get to agree with almost anything. And there's gay people for Hamas. Believe it or not, trans people for Hamas. It's fucking... I know. Blacks for the clan. I don't know how many of them are real because there's a few people that troll online. And they'll pretend I'm a trans woman.

1:07:18But I'm also a Muslim. Okay. And they will throw you off a fucking roof. No, there's none left. There's no roof left. There's a couple of high points. It's just hard to get to them. It's... Here's... And obviously... As a comic, I believe in a First Amendment. I say shit that you can't cancel me. Anyhow. I believe... And maybe I'm wrong and maybe you disagree out. I want to see your opinion. Look at this. Okay, after... You're on for the 1970s. Look, girls and mini skirts looking hot. They look... That looks like... You're up. Look at this. Girls sitting in front of a car. Shoot a little out there.

1:07:55She'd be fucking killed doing that now. Yeah. Look at the beaches in Iran in the 1970s. Isn't that fucking crazy? No litter. Look at these... God. Look at this. Tits on that one. One lady though. That was the future. The future is in the lower right corner. Covered up like Yoda. It's crazy. It's crazy. That's what happened to that place. Look at these people hanging out. Being free. 1979 is when it all went to shit. And they call it the revolution. But I think it was US backs on... Okay, what's your opinion? It's my opinion. Free speech. Protest all you want at college. There's protests wherever.

1:08:38But take off the masks. You know? I know you should take off the masks. Period. I know it's a leave in a society where people walk around with their faces covered. I think there's... It's too dangerous. Yes. It's a public safety issue. It's too hard to identify criminals. It's too hard to identify someone who commits a crime. During the... During the Vietnam protests. There was never a mask. Those people were proud to protest against the Vietnam War. But there wasn't a facial recognition. Software, cameras in this guy. It was like... You know. It's true. It's true. But now... They're hiding and they're committing to me...

1:09:18Some crimes on campus. I think... Well, they're certainly doing a lot of things. They shouldn't be allowed to do like disrupting classes and screaming at professors and... They're built organized. Yeah. Yeah, it's organized. And people join in because they just join... They want to be... A part of a group. And there's just a lot of people in this world. There's leaders and there's followers. And there's a lot of followers. More followers than leaders in the world. So, I will get off of this because I know it kind of... You know, but I just wanted to... Are you a mapback? No, I have other things in there.

1:09:50I have other good points in there. It is a good point though. But it's like... When you have people that are bitter enemies like this, like these kind of conflicts take thousands of years to work through. And in the case of Israel, it's just... It is thousands of years old.

1:10:09It's... Look, how they can... When anything through the UN, when there's... Twenty -two, twenty -three -hour countries in the UN and Israel. So, everything is going to be voted against Israel. There are twenty -two, twenty -three fucking -hour... Like I said, I can't solve or... Whatever is it? Is it unfair? Is it whatever? My concern is what's going on in this country. That's my main concern. My daughter's going to college. I don't want her to go to a college where she feels scared to go to class. Right. Where she feels threatened just to be who she is. To go to college in Texas? I know. That's what she...

1:11:00I wanted to go to... They have to... They have to be able to... They have to be able to carry on college campuses here. You know, it's so... This is a different place. It's a different time. This is what America is supposed to be in a lot of ways. It's supposed to be a lot more free. Less laws. But, you know, there's a lot of laws here that are kind of crazy. The abortion thing, the six -week thing... Most women don't even know their pregnant that quickly. I think if a woman... If a woman? If a lady. A woman... Okay, okay. I told you I walked out in the eleventh grade. If a lady, I think does all her chores.

1:11:39I think... I think once a week she should be able to wear slacks. I... Abortion to me. I even... It's not really... I think a man... And I could be wrong. If you're married or you live with your spouse, the male might have what, 20, 25 % of the decision may be 30. But some single guy probably never had a girlfriend, never lived with a girl. Shut the fuck up. Yeah. Shut the fuck up. You know what, you just want to be part of something. Well, people love controlling people, though. They really do. Which is why, you know, those climate protests drove me fucking crazy where the protests for climate change by blocking the highway.

1:12:25Those fucking idiots. All they want to do is control people. That's what they want to do. You're not changing anyone's mind. No, not at all. Holding a flag in the middle of the highway. You're just pissing people off. But you're controlling people by stopping traffic. And that's what people like to do. They like to control people. And they don't know if somebody's given birth or somebody has to get to the hospital or for anything. A hundred percent. It's all self -centered. Oh, fuckin' I'm more important in you. Yes. You know, don't paint on somebody with a fur. They should turn around and fucking beat the daylights out of them.

1:13:01Or these fucking climate people walking into the Reich Museum, or to then go and throw them paint on a fucking... Or to be looing yourself to the wall. Yeah, what's crazy? And then again... You see what they did at the Porsche dealership? They glued themselves to the floor and the Porsche dealership. They just shut the lights off and left them in there. Oh, really? Yeah, fuck you. They came back the next day. They glued their hands to the floor. Like, that they're gonna stop everything and they were like, okay, good. We'll just shut the doors. Shut the doors, leave them in there to shit themselves.

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1:15:46That's rocketmoney .com slash JRE. Rocket Money .com slash JRE. Porsche are nice cars. Why would they attack Porsche? They're only doing it because they know it'll get attention. That's all it is. It's a bunch, usually a bunch of very privileged rich kids, white kids, that come from a family that has a lot of wealth and to rebel against their parents or probably fucking investment bankers or something. They decide they're going to fight climate change, man. They don't even understand what they're fighting. They don't understand the science. They don't. It's complex. It's multi -layered and nuanced.

1:16:23There's a lot of propaganda that's attached to what they call the green agenda. Because the green agenda, like all things that are big and public, is profitable. They have a bunch of companies that if they can get these laws push forward, they can have industries that emerge and their industry can benefit from all these laws. And so they'll fund protests. They'll get people to do things. But it's all 4D chess. There's all these multiple layers of things happening. And then there's the inconvenient actual climate data that the Washington Post printed that showed that over the last 50 million years, we're in a decline.

1:17:01The Earth is in a cooling period. And the Earth's never, like you probably know this, but for people who don't, there's never been a static temperature on Earth. It's always gone up and down wildly. It's unpredictable. It has multiple, multiple factors. Carbon is probably one of them. But it's not the big one. It's not all of it. There's solar activity that's, you can't control at all. Solar flares happen and some of them happen. They've happened in the early 1800s. They blew out all the fucking Morse code systems. There was a big solar flare in the 1800s that, let's see if you can find that. But they can blow out the power grid, easy, kill all the satellites, easy.

1:17:48What carbon is is food for plants. It's the dumbest fucking thing to protest against. Pollution is a giant issue. Yeah, do we have an impact on the weather? I'm sure we do. We have an impact on fucking everything. But CO2, net zero, all this shit. This is nonsense. Carrington event. Most intense geomagnetic storm recorded history peaking on 1 -2 September 1859 during the solar cycle 10. Created strong or rural displays that reported globally and caused sparking and even fires in telegraph stations. The geomagnetic storm was most likely the result of a coronal mass ejection from the sun colliding with Earth's magnetosphere.

1:18:34So if we have some of those in the future, it could do anything. Let's see, a geomagnetic storm of this magnitude occurring today has the potential to cause widespread electrical disruptions, blackouts, and damage to the electrical power grid. We've got real problems, real problems. And you're not going to solve it with electric cars. You're just not. You're not going to solve it with windmills. No, look, if you drive up the Jersey term pike or anywhere and the factories and the lights and all the smoke and all that shit, just everything. All right. Me turning off my light bulb is not going to make a fucking difference.

1:19:17Well, particularly when you look at the emissions that come from China. China is an enormous, enormous contributor to carbon emissions and not just carbon emissions but pollutants, particulates. They're not stopping. They built 200 new coal plants. They're not going to stop. No matter what we do, they're going to do what's best for China financially, period, end of discussion. All these conversations that they're having about net zero go fuck yourself. You're not going to stop that. And this is what they're looking out for their best interests. That's what they're doing. Just like every other fucking country is basically doing is survival.

1:19:59And that's my point with Israel. They're looking out for what's going to keep us from being extinguished off this fucking planet. Right. And you know, whatever it takes. That's what the Jews, and I'm getting back on this because you lost me on all that shit. But what the Jews need is a Malcolm X of Jews. Oh boy. Look, Malcolm X was great. He didn't say, hate. He didn't say go after it, white man. He said, do what we have to do. Why don't you do that? Why don't you be the Malcolm X with the Jews? Maybe that's your calling. My vocabulary.

1:20:41You know what I mean? There's no way to tighten that up a little bit. I could a little with Bonnie's help. I fired my manager two weeks ago, and I had her write it out for me because I knew I would have said something fucked up. I mean, that's smart. You know, and another thing I go, hey, listen. You know, seven years, it's time to move on. And then I hope we still be friends, and he went definitely not like, are you sure? Maybe we could work this out. It's like when you fucking leave a girl. She was like, great. Okay. Wait, whoa. Come on. I added something to fight for me. Nope. So, yeah, I would love to speak in colleges or, or, or maybe that's not cool.

1:21:27No, let it cool. You're right. Give it a year or so. Give it a year. I probably wouldn't be able to get to the auditorium. Trump said the wildest shit about Gaza. We're going to turn into the Mediterranean of the Middle East. What? We're going to take it. But he keeps saying, and I don't follow, you know, if you don't release the hostages, just held a pay. Well, what has hell, what has he done to help release the hostages? I mean, we're, now they're being attacked by fucking Yemen through the, you know, I mean, what? I don't know. Release the fucking hostages and then maybe things are left. Maybe hostages are left.

1:22:11No. What is it? 70 or 50? I don't know because they keep dropping, you know, four hostages for a thousand prisoners or whatever. You know, I mean, whatever. Is that what they're doing? Whatever. It's a trade off. How many prisoners they got to give them for a hostage. And, you know, these, this what it never went on in this, we would not have put up, I mean, we did with Carter with, uh, the two Iranian hostages. Yeah, two hundred day were there for what, two years or two years. Well, they kept them there until Reagan was in office. Yeah. They kept them there until after the election. That was part of the deal.

1:22:49Yeah. Part of the deal was you release these folks after Reagan takes over so that Carter can get credit for it. Yeah. I'm sure. Oh, yeah. Yeah. That was written. Imagine you're a fucking, you're in there and you're like, Jesus Christ. I got to be in here for four more months. Four months. So this guy gets credit. So it's fucking crazy. Well, did you hear, I didn't see it. I only read what these reporters and journalists, what she said on 60 minutes. Do you think the hostages didn't feed you because they ran out of food? Oh, that Hamas didn't feed the hostages? Yeah. Because they're running out of food.

1:23:24They're running out of food. They're running out of food. They're running out of food. Did she really say that? In an interview, look it up. She said that to one of the hostages. Do you think they didn't, and don't quote me because this is what I read. I don't want to get sued by Leslie, whoever. But I think she said what I read, do you think the, uh, the captors didn't feed you because they ran out of food? That's a crazy thing to say to someone who's a hostage. Yeah. That's crazy. I'm fucking 60 minutes. I'm sure. How do you say something like that? That's a crazy thing to say. But they're bad.

1:23:53The problem with these 60 minutes journalists is the same problem with what they did with the Kamala Harris interview where they took a bumbling answer and edited it out and put an answer to she gave to something else in its place to make it look like she gave six -sinked clear cut answers. It's, it's, it's not really journalism. They're not, they're not doing journal. That's not a question you say to a hostage. Yeah. When you're talking to a hostage, you want to find out what the experience was like in, in, in as compassionate away as you can to talk to this person who's been through hell. You, you don't ask them, do you ever think that maybe they didn't feed you because they didn't have any food that we've sells?

1:24:36Well, here you go. Look at what their face looks like and look at those sunken -in faces of the starving to death hostages. And well, obviously they didn't, they didn't give them any food. So shut up. It's, it's, you can't watch their news. You can't because you're going to go to some news anymore. It's not, it's, no, it's not, it's clickbait and it's, it's a business and it's a shitty business. It's not good at doing what it does and it's all bought and paid for by pharmaceutical drug ads and it's just not the news. It's not, you get some information that you can learn but it's not like the unbiased, this is what happened, this is what caused it, this is what's being done now.

1:25:17It's not that. It's like halfway, they're, they're kind of almost activists. I, I had an argument with somebody close to me because I go on gut felt, I try to go on once a month like I said and, and she says, Oh, oh, you're, you're pro Trump. I go, I'm not pro anything or anti anything. I go, I go on, where else is it comic going to sit for an hour? Try to be funny. On TV. Yeah, on TV for an hour. It's not much left. There's not, and it's definitely not going to be on the left because they're not going to let me say the things that I get away. Yeah. On the gut felt, and it's a great show. I mean, it's, if you say something funny, they laugh.

1:26:00It's, to me, the closest to tough crowd. Right. To me. I see where you're saying it. Not quite, but not quite. But it's, I mean, it's fun. And, and, and it gets, whatever reviews. And I said to this person, you work with the pharmaceutical companies for 30 years and you're going to tell the, yeah, and you're going to go on your high horse about me doing a show that's going to be good. It's going to help my career and build numbers. And, well, it's not the same. No, it's worse. It's worse. It's worse. It's worse. It's a pharmaceutical drug companies are responsible for who knows how many deaths and injuries.

1:26:38Yeah, they do good too. Absolutely. Some pharmaceutical drugs are great, but you can't be on your high horse. You work for them. That's great. In any other business, they'd be in jail. They would be in fucking jail. They would lie about what your product does and it kills a bunch of people. You're in jail. Can we talk about one of the reasons I'm here? I don't know if you remember this. I hope you do. I had this torn rotator cuff. And you said, come down. Yeah, we're going to get you some stem cells. Now, what's the B, the BPC? BPC157. Is that bad? Which is better for stem cells or the BPC? There's no one better.

1:27:20They're all very good. BPC157 is called body protection compound. It's a peptide that helps heal soft tissue damage. So does stem cells. All the different things are good. Because I'm not getting my shoulders operated on. It's like a six month. It's rough. And it doesn't always work. So what is exactly as wrong with your shoulder? Well, this is a torn rotator cuff. I have, I even brought to disk. The X -ray. Oh, great. Did you do any exercises for it? You're doing your rehabs for it? Not yet. Because I was waiting to do this to see where this took me. Oh, good. And then how I would go from there.

1:27:58But you know what? Exercises are always good. Like bands like band work. Yeah. You do these kind of things where you keep your, you keep like a towel pressed to your body. So you're holding a place and do these rotations with bands. Like all those things are good just to keep everything strong. Anyway. Do you do any of that stuff? Not those yet. I haven't tried. I tried. Did you ever hang from a chin up bar? You ever do this? No. For a torn rotator? Yeah. Just to strengthen and to release a pressure in your shoulders. Oh, really? No. It's good for shoulder health in general to hang from a chin up bar.

1:28:32And if you can't hang what you do is like get on a box or something that brings you to the height of the bar. Yeah. And just hang a little. Just could some weight on it until you can hang fully. I mean, look, I can, I can still play golf. I could swing like this. That's good. So there's a totally fucked. Okay. So when I went to the doctor, there's a lot of things you can do. Rehabilitation things you can do that will help you. Here's the only thing and I could be wrong. You'll know when they said, you know, rehab to build up the muscle. But I'm 67. How much more muscle am I building? If you're 167 you can build muscle.

1:29:10That's a silly way to look. Oh, really? Okay. 100 % if you're alive, that means your body's recovering. So that means your body's generating tissue. That means you can build muscle. Okay. If you can go play golf, you can build muscle. Yes. 100%. If you're 80 fucking years old and a woman, you can build muscle. I mean, I work out. I just certain exercises I can do. Yeah, just you need to do exercises that rehabilitate your shoulder. Yeah. You can't just expect it to get better on its own. You're going to have to put it through some work to strengthen the muscles around it. Well, I'm going to have, like I said, after I do this, when you go, when you fly it out, when is the day?

1:29:46Okay, great. So we'll get you in the morning. No worries. Cool. Good you into waist well and we'll set it up. Did I bring the shoulder with that halt with my map? No, I thought it was a good conversation. Yeah, it's good. It's a good map. You know, I got more stuff. I don't want to back. I put it out of budget stuff. I don't want to go back and have my fucking dumb two friends going. Hey, you didn't bring anything up. Was that what they do? Yes. I was not talking to them. Then, then my wife, don't say anything stupid. Was that what she said? Yeah, she goes, she goes, she goes. Sorry, Bonnie. You know, be funny.

1:30:24That's what you are coming at. I was, I was pretty funny. I got to say, listen, I'm, I'm a good interviewer. You're fine. You're doing fine. You know what, you know what? The best, not your best. What a great show would be. What? Me, Colin and Norton in here. Oh, that'd be phenomenal. That'd be phenomenal. Just like tough crowd. Yeah. He probably could do it today, unless you did it on the internet. But you could still do it on the internet. Like, Colin should really bring it back. I know. There's plenty of guys that could still do it. Like, Norton would be fucking phenomenal at it. We just did Norton's podcast.

1:30:58Me, Colin and Norton, whatever podcast, he's got 12 of them in him. And it was one of the most funniest things when it comes out, you'll ever hear. I stream together. It's like a fucking... You give back in the old groove again. Yeah, because we'll just stay there to have fun. We'll have fun. Yeah. Tough crowd in open Anthony. We're huge for comedy. Huge. Thank you. Because open Anthony, one of the things that they did that was brilliant is they just let us just go wild. Just be ourselves. They didn't really try to control it at all. You know, Anthony would jump in with some funny shit. But the whole show was like, bring on a bunch of comics.

1:31:36Yeah. Have them talk a bunch of shit. Give them the reins. I mean, I could... I was in there one day. Anthony was in a piece of cake. I walked by him and smacked it out of his hand.

1:31:51He left his heart and his body on the planet. Because... The times we had in there. I was on there with... Well, you with me when they brought in Marion Perry. Well, you weren't there? You weren't there? Marion Perry. Marion Perry, the fucking... The mayor. The mayor of Washington, D .C., the rest of the smoking crack. No, you were in there with him. Oh, that had to be... We grabbed him. We grabbed him. I thought you were in there. Norton was in there for sure. He was next door doing something and doing another interview. And he was in the hallway. And I think Opie said, Marion Perry's in the hallway right now.

1:32:32I'm like, let's go get him. And we got him. We brought him in. And I started asking him about crack. He was like, well, nobody knows what was in that pipe. Well, you know. You fucking know. Well, you smoking that wasn't crack. That's almost crazy. You know, I'll really smoke tobacco out of a class pipe. One of my favorites is when he was running for re -election, which he eventually won after that. They asked these people, do you have a problem with the fact that the mayor used to smoke crack? The interview this guy was, he was, oh, everybody smoke a little crack every now and then. I was like, oh, this conversation's over.

1:33:06This conversation's over. It's... I remember the times and I was in there one time. This episode is brought to you by Visible. I want to let you in on something. Your current wireless carrier does not want you to know about Visible because Visible is the ultimate wireless hack. No confusing plans with surprise fees. No nonsense. Just fast speeds, great coverage without the premium cost. With Visible, you get one -line wireless with unlimited data powered by Verizon's network for $25 a month. Taxes and fees included. Seriously, $25 a month flat. What you see is what you pay. No hidden fees on top of that.

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1:35:10Do yourself a favor, go to Manscaped .com. Use the code Rogan15 at checkout and get 15 % off your entire order. Again, that's code Rogan15 for 15 % off your entire order at Manscaped .com. Own the summer, own the Dome. Pete Rose, Bobby Kelly, Ricky Jervais, right? And fucking Pete Rose called me because you look like some rat face soccer player. Whenever he said it was very funny. Whenever Pete Rose said it was very fucking funny. So, I walk over to Bobby, then I walk past Bobby, and I walk past Pete Rose and I sit down. And Pete Rose says, why you out of breath? I go, because I had to walk around you too.

1:36:00That fucks me. And Jervais, but you could say anything you wanted on that show. Yeah. Yeah, because I never went on it until it went to XM. I was never on it with no wrong terrestrial radio. When they got kicked off terrestrial radio and then they got on XM. And when they got on XM, it was wild. It was like the first time. It was like, there was Howard, when Howard got on XM or serious, I guess, first before they merged. And then the ONA show was on XM. Like, this is fucking crazy. This is crazy. This is basically Green Room Talk. Green Room Talk for the whole world. Well, okay, so I brought Patrice into ONA.

1:36:46Did you really? Yeah, I brought him in. Wow. He fucking smashed me today. I walked him in. Because we went through the back. We went through this way. Now he goes, what do you think this is good for? You walked me through the back. You couldn't take me through the front door. So he became a fixture on it. Yeah. So one day we're in fucking ONA. And I'm driving this little Porsche boxster. He's driving this big escalade. Because, you know, he's a fucking, you know, buffamelist. And he's in this. So he's saying he's trashed on one of my Rolexes going, you're a fucking selfish douchebag driving a Porsche to me.

1:37:25So you can't have people, you know, and I'm not thinking, well, maybe if you didn't eat fucking pound cake or whatever, you wouldn't need a big S. But he's beating me down bad. I mean, fucking kill me. I'm speechless. Right? Speechless. He's fucking just pounding me. And I walk out of that fucking soda next day or two days later, I go online and he's stretching my car. I looked at the price of my car, new, and the price of his car. And I send it to him. I go, look, my shitty car costs more than your car, new. And he calls me and goes, you're still thinking about this? He goes, really? You're thinking about it right now?

1:38:09Yes. Still. No, no, no. To this day you're arguing with him. No, no, no. I should have. I was, oh, he. Yeah. We would, I would drive him home. One night I was driving him back to Jersey City. And I had a bathroom and we were walking up to his house. And he says, oh, man, I don't have a manager in ancient, nothing's going on. I go, I can't get work. I don't have an agent either, nothing. And we just both started cracking up and walking. It was the funniest thing. We, fuck it, I can't. We were, we were reading for the head of a sitcom for ABC, Me and Patrice. We were going to be the leads of this sitcom.

1:38:56So we go into the head of casting at Marcy Phillips. And he doesn't want to be there and I can't act. So basically, I'm not a good, and at the time. So he won't take his face out of the fucking copy. And I'm trying to read with him the scene. And he won't look at me. And Marcy Phillips is yelling at me. Go, what are you doing? I go, this fucking guy won't connect with me. How can I act with somebody that won't look at me? And she goes, can you two please leave? We left all the way down the hallway. We left. We just got kicked out of an audition as the leads of sitcom. And we just cracked up all the way.

1:39:44Because it just, to us, was the funniest being funny in the moment. The idea of you getting a sitcom was so unlikely. It was always also unlikely that when it failed, like if you want an audition and it was fucked up, it wasn't going to happen anyway. You never thought this is going to be it. Yeah, never once. No, never. I walked out of an audition once. I just got back from Aspen. I had a lot of heat in Aspen. But this is one of my anxiety. I've had anxiety my whole life. 21, I was hospitalized for anxiety when I was trying. And they didn't know what it was. They thought you were just nuts and gave you thorzing and how dull and you shuffled around like a crazy man.

1:40:26This is, you know, explaining to me what it feels like. What is this anxiety like? Well, when I had it, when I had it there, well, I felt so disconnected that even when I talked it felt like an echo almost, like I was outside of myself. Like if I look into mirror, I'm going whom I look into. It was just so, so disconnected. And you were 21? Yeah, 21. Wow. Smoking pot and stuff. Oh, that's it. Well, some of it was probably where am I going in life? Yeah. And you're getting hot. And I'm getting hot. Ooh. You know, if you're freaking out and you get hot, you know, you have to be right now. No, I know why to you because you said you have to go to the bathroom.

1:41:09You were talking about your story then. Okay. Because I was like preparing to like cut it off and let you go to the bathroom. No, no, no, this is the best day of my life. I just prefer to fucking map. The map turned out great. It turned out like a little conversation. I had to talk to fucking less. I got it's Monday. Thursday. The Thursday ones are so much better. I'm at Monday. So my anxiety. Wait, what was, what did it feel like or what? Yeah. What was the, like when you say overwhelmed you to the point you had to go to the hospital. What's your point? Well, it's already beating. I was just, I didn't know what was going on.

1:41:50It turned into panic or whatever. Right. Like I was so fucked up. My friends, you know, I was going to, I was selling meat and seafood out of a car, out of a truck, some businesses back then. I went in this nervous. I go, help me. I'll give you some free steaks and seafood. And I was just out of my fucking mind. When I get anxiety talking about it, it really gives you a little anxiety. So my friends go, let's take them to Florida. He needs a vacation. We drove to Florida. I was here for a day. I said, I got to get to fuck out of here. Take me home and we drove there and drove back. Then I checked into the hospital.

1:42:31The fifth floor, basically for fucking kukus. Kukus. Kustai really didn't know what anxiety was back then. Isn't that crazy? Isn't that crazy because that's not that long -go in human history. Well, I mean, it was 40 something years ago. But in the last 40 years, how much they've learned? Well, yeah, but also too. It's easier to say that person's nuts give them thorexine, howd, whatever. Antisacotic drugs. And I swear to God, you know, my day was, and then I would shuffle. I would shuffle around the floor with this girl. I mean, this one girl. My friends came up to see me and I'm like, I can't see you today.

1:43:20We're going for a walk. You know, I was like one flu of the kukus. I was fucking out of my mind. So that could have been you for the rest of your life. Oh, Jesus. So I know. Well, because I did do acid in my day. And people sometimes do that shit. Never come back. Never come back. And I saw that on Dragnet. So that's in real life. Yeah, it is real. Sterns talked about that. Yeah. You did a big dose of acid once. And he was fucked up for a long time. It'll fuck you up. And this is a guy from Pink Floyd that disappeared. Oh, I hope it's fucking Roger. No, it's how dare you. How dare I? How dare you?

1:43:58What's the name again? Shine on you, Crazy Diamond? Oh, you mean he did acid? Yeah. It's not just one person. There's been a lot of people that had an acid trip and just never came back. Yeah, my brother didn't. When we were doing, he was really young. He was having a bad trip. And I had a babysitter on the whole day. Yeah, it's fucking scary. Yeah. That's it. David Gilmore. So written by David Gilmore. But it's not, it's about who was it about? Sid Barrett, that's right. Sid Barrett did acid. Went crazy. See, right there. Departor from the ban in 1968 after dealing with the mental health problems and substance abuse.

1:44:39The story is he never came back. It's crazy. How? That's the most, that drug is so uncontrollable. Well, also, what's the dose? An effective dose is a droplet on your tongue, which is crazy. Well, we were doing blotter or window pain, four -way window pain. Who's making that? They're not making it in the same labs or they're making Tylenol. Yeah, they're making some fucking great stuff. Some god -y old basement. Yeah. Oh, too much goes into that track. Yeah. So I got out of the hospital and for years, I don't know how long it took. It passed. Life started getting better, whatever. Then, and I would get anxiety, it would come and go.

1:45:27But back then, I didn't know what it was. It turned into panic. And so then, when I was 40, I would watch my kids, after I got divorced, I would have my kids every day. I would work nights and I watched my, I guess, four and six -year -old. My wife would either drop them off or I would pick them up, then drop them off. I would have them in the days. My day was my kids, whatever. Go to the park, do this, do that, just watch them like it. So then, they went off to school full time, you know. First grade. So now, I'm at 40 years old, living in some fucking third floor apartment, divorced from my first wife, bouncing off a fucking walls again.

1:46:22I mean, fucking 40 years old. No, I'm going, I got a quick comedy. I got to go into the psych ward, I'm fucked up. This is fucked up. So I found this therapist who was also, and I was already sober. I found this therapist that was in recovery. And he basically brought me back, you know, some medication through his partner who was a psychiatrist. He was a therapist. Great, I could talk, I could say anything to him, whatever, you know. And then it just got better. And then I realized and worked, knowing whatever anxiety I feel, it'll pass. Nothing lasts forever. It'll pass. Like I had a little anxiety for the last week thinking about this, I go, what, you know.

1:47:20I'm doing a little bit because I'm with friends and I've done podcasts and what Bonnie goes, shut up and be funny, be whatever. You know, a million things went through my fucking head. Because I mean, shit, you've had fucking Trump on, Elon, you know what I mean. And that's my low self -esteem. Because of course, I should be doing everything in my mind. Do you see what I'm saying? Does that make sense? But even when I did Tough Crowd, I was on 30 times every episode I had an anxiety till it started. Every special or everything I've ever done, anxiety for the first, second, I walk out, boom, gone.

1:48:02All right, it's just... Well, that's because you care. I mean, what you're calling anxiety is just nerves. Yeah. Let's say, whenever there's, if you're doing something that's difficult or something that's important to you, you're going to have nerves. That's normal. It's healthy. That shows you're challenging yourself, which is one of the most important things you can do in life to stay vibrant. Yeah, you have to challenge yourself. When I did Trump, when we roasted Trump, this was a fry or roast, right? It wasn't... It broke away from Comedy Central, right? It broke away. So, it's at... Hilton in New York, 2 ,000 people.

1:48:46Anybody that meant anything in New York, from club owners, agents, managers, celebrities, they were all there. So the first act goes up, this guy, Stewie Stone, old -time, Catskill comic. He kills, like, no one I've ever seen kill on a roast. Fuck you, Trump. Fuck you. You can see no fuck you. Fuck you. He's fucking slaughtered, right? And I'm sitting on the desk. I'm sitting next to Isaac Hayes, Opie and Anthony are there. My father, his wife, Bonnie, before I married her. And he... I go, I'm going to end my career. I go, I'm going to end my career here. Okay. My then Suzy Esman goes up. Slodders.

1:49:36Slodders. I guess Amaro's wrote her some funny jokes and she's great at roast. And I was ready to sneak off the fucking, just leave. I go, it might be better if I leave, didn't go up. Well then Bells were went up. So... Took a little window at the room. Took a little, you know. Yeah. So, Regis Filman was the host. It was three weeks after Ronnie Dangerfield died, three weeks. They introduced me. I go, big hand for Regis. Originally they asked for Ronnie to host, but he said he'd rather be dead. Three weeks, right?

1:50:26Zero. Almost zero. Really? Right. But I got a... I go, don't fucking me. I'll bring Bells or back. Right. I had an outsharp and was sitting on the day. I can't believe I said this, but back then it was okay. He wasn't roasting, but he was on the day. And that's when he was running for president. And I said, the only way you'll get on the White House property is with a lantern in your hand. I said, I'm so fucking minding care. And then I got him back. Three of the jokes that I said were the ones that were printed in the newspapers. You know, the one I did, I go, Trump, the reason Trump puts his names on his buildings is so the banks know which ones to take back.

1:51:12And that was 20 years ago. But it was the most terrifying moment. What it next to doing Dev Jam as the first White Guy was one of the most terrifying moments in my... I mean, I'm going to end my career. But Dev Jam, you know, Dev Jam was on for five years. The number one show in HBO. They go, okay, we're going to use the White Guy, it's me. Right. So now I got White Comics. You better be funny. I have Black... White Comics are saying that too? You got to represent us? Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Which ones? I want to know what you're saying. 20 years ago. The White Comics that were doing Black rooms back then.

1:51:54Oh, I see. You know what I mean? Then it was Black Comics mad that I'm doing it, and they're not, you know what I mean. So they're taping in New York every five nights. This is funny. Five nights. Was that when they were filming in Harlem? It was... I don't know. It was in New York five nights at some theater. Okay. And it was the year I did it to fifth year when they had a different guest host every night. Like Martin Lawrence was into one night, one show Chris Rock, Chappelle, Jamie Foxe, and Steve, what's his name? Harvey was my host. You know, so I'm going every night. I mean, I went in one night, and it was just so funny.

1:52:40Like, Guy Torrey would come out and do the warm -up. And he would say, listen, this is not the Apollo. There's no fucking booing here. This is HBO. We don't boo, right? This is a whole nother level. We don't want here any booing. So this comic comes out. He walks out. And with a black audience, if you're wearing the wrong sneakers, you're in trouble. Believe me. I used to do a lot of things. He comes out in like Reeboks. He's wearing an all -gold suit. And his first joke in New York is, I just want to say I'm not from New York. I'm from Canada, right? Oh, no. He's bomb and so bad. And when a black audience can't boo you, all you heard in the room was, hmm.

1:53:30Hmm. Hmm.

1:53:35Child. It was brutal. So I'm, now, they're taped five nights, two shows a night. I'm on the last night, second show, and I go second to last. Now all the comics that were still in town, that were the celebrity hosts, all the, we're at the taping. I'm going, this is one of the scariest moments of my life. I mean, you know, no white guy. Steve Harvey brings me out. He goes, oh, our next act is something we haven't seen or special, whatever. And Russell made me wear his clothing. I got fat farm on and these baggy pants, you know. And I look back on it because it was 25 years. It would be different.

1:54:31I was, I panned her a lot to some extent. You know what I mean? I did grow up in that neighborhood, but I'm out like this, you know, you know. And it worked out luckily, but I look back and go, I would never do that now from 25 years ago, the pandering and, and you know, just, just, you know, talking like I'm fucking from the hood and shit, you know. And I had a good set. It worked out, but it was the second scariest moment in my career. Well, listen to what you just said. Both scariest moments of your career worked out great. Yes, they always, yeah. So wouldn't that eventually build some confidence?

1:55:16Oh, I have confidence. Okay. It just sounded good. Oh, no, I'm just in the scary moments. Listen, you, you, you always got a question yourself in this business because you want to get better. You want to, you just, I don't know. I question myself. I go, I have, not again, not a ego. I have a reputation to live up to. So, of the stuff I've done in this business. Right. So I, I come out and people are going, look, Bobby, Bobby and Keith, we're at the seller one night. I go, I got a spot at the underground. They go, we're going to come over and watch you bomb. That sounds like Keith and Bobby, right?

1:56:10So, so Nikki, Nikki glazers on. Killin, killin, not to clean us but funny. I don't give a fuck what somebody else. She's funny and she was killing. So I went on and my first two jokes, I, I, I, they killed and I go, see, Bobby, he, Keith, I can follow anybody, right? Right. Well, then I didn't know this. They went into the back corners of the room and after every joke, they would go, oh, oh, and I had a whole audience turn on me going, what's going on? I would say a joke that might have been a little edge here and they would go, oh, real loud. And so the whole audience is going, what's this guy doing up there?

1:57:06They're groaning. One table goes, what's going on here? And I'm fucking bombing now because he's two fucking jimokes are in the back room going, oh, my God.

1:57:23It's so fucking funny, Bobby and Keith. Well, that was the culture. The culture of comic goes was like constant busting balls, constant busting balls. We, somebody would go on stage and we would all go downstairs and sit in like the front row and one. That is the, there's nothing worse you could do for a comic. Are your friends sitting the front row and stare at you? You're like, what are you doing, man? When Kevin Hart was leaving New York to go to fucking LA, he threw himself a little go away fucking show at Boston comedy. You remember Boston comedy? Sure. So he's on stage pontificating, doing whatever.

1:58:04And I don't know why, but me, Keith and Patrice were in the back at a room. And it was like 10 phone books back there. And he's up and we started throwing phone books at him. Phone books? Yeah, they were just in the club from, I guess they were delivered there. All these phone and we're throwing phone books at Kevin Hart. And he says, an interview. And he goes, I knew I was accepted when they were throwing phone books at me. I knew I was part of the crew, you know. But we were just he even phone books at him, like fucking three assholes in the back of the room, I mean. And we would just, it was just fun.

1:58:46It was probably the most fun I've had in comedy when we would just stand out. So me, Patrice, Keith and Norton told three and four in the morning in front of Boston just stretching each other and laughing.

1:59:07You can't replicate that. It can happen again. It was just so funny. Keith is, he's fun if you see him around, you know, or Norton or Bobby, but it was so much fun. I heard Keith is killing it now. Even with his strokes, his special, we were at the tape and the fact that he didn't win an Emmy, it was so fucking good, his special. He painted a picture when he was told, you could see everything he was saying. Him in the hospital, him with a stroke. And it was so good. We walked, I walked out there going, this is the best thing I've ever seen. It was so good. He was so good, you know, I don't know why he didn't know.

1:59:57I mean, it's who gives a fuck about that. Yeah, yeah, you fuck off. Everybody knows how good it was. All those fucking awards, award shows for art to me are some of the most ridiculous things. Yeah, really? How many fucking albums? I don't even want to say our name, but they don't know. They don't know fun. It doesn't matter. You're right. It doesn't. It's just an industry way that they can celebrate each other and then they put on a show and the show generates money and they make a bunch of money from the show and then it becomes a thing they hold over your head. Maybe you can win a Grammy, maybe you can win an Emmy, maybe you can win this, you got to be a part of the club.

2:00:31Like look what happened to Chris. He wanted to be a part of that group, doing the Oscars and they could smack by Will Smith. They don't arrest him and then 10 minutes later or whatever it was, Will Smith's on stage is receiving the Academy Award and the give me a standing ovation. It's fucking insanity. That is Hollywood. That shows you what these people are. The want their love and their respect is pointless. They don't even know what they like. They like whatever everybody tells them to like. They don't understand what they're supporting. It's just a bunch of people wanting to be a part of the group that's the in group.

2:01:08What do we have to do? What do I have to agree with? That's all it is. Years ago, and it's true, if that would shapel, he wouldn't have smacked shapel. Because shapel is a little cut, a little bigger. Wow. I don't know. The whole thing was crazy. It's for a guy. One move. He does one move now. Everybody remembers nothing but that forever. But what fuck I am legend, fuck I'll leave you. All those different things he did that were awesome. Nobody cares anymore. You'd like, that's the guy that's the guy that's the guy that's the guy that's the Every day he's got to wake up in the morning and go, fuck.

2:01:38That one thing. Fuck. If he hadn't done that, if he just ate it, by the way, not even bad jokes. Like the G .I. Jane, this the most fucking, that was a powerful movie. It was a great movie. A strong woman. Like it's not even really an insult. It was just silly. Just smack a guy like that. And then that's your thing forever. People are going to remember that. Yeah. Crazy. Like blunders. And that probably comes from not having anxiety, by the way. That comes from having too much confidence. Confidence too much too much too much of a belief in yourself too much of a belief. Yes. And your own importance that you can interrupt this entire enormous award show, the biggest award show in the industry, that you're set up to receive a fucking Academy award.

2:02:25What about an hour or whatever it was? You're going to go up there and smack a guy on TV. Why would you do that? Because he doesn't have that anxiety. So your anxiety shields you from doing something like that. Something like that. The fear and the insecurity sometimes is good. Sometimes good for you. Like the lack of insecurity could be the worst thing. If you're too cocky, it's, yeah, they say be humble. Be humble. You know, and I thought Chris handled it as well. Let's see what can he do? What can he do other than run off the stage? Yeah. Which you probably should have just walked off after he got smacked.

2:03:07Because he tried to keep going. Yeah, he's, I worked with him on both Oscars. He hosted it and he is the nicest guy in the planet. If you, I guess if you're, I don't know, just from working with him, you know, he's a very nice guy. And also he's harmless. Like he's not a smacker harmless person. That's crazy. Yes. I'll tell you what, if that was Tony, there would have been a fight. Oh, yeah, Tony. Yeah, Tony went off on stage like right after all about it. Yeah. And Tony's a different dude. But Chris, like he's, like almost if it was anybody but Chris, you know, I mean, you can't do that to anybody else.

2:03:49It's a query. If you did the Kevin Hart, Kevin Howard crack him. The whole thing is crazy. It was crazy. It didn't make any sense. It's like the guys in some sort of a very bizarre relationship with his wife. Yeah. You know, whatever internal conflicts they have, just manifested itself in a terrible decision that he made. If he would have said that about my wife, I would have smacked her and said laugh. Yeah. Laughing. It's funny. Funny. Come on. Yes, he. But you know, not being able to take a joke is one of the worst qualities that people can have. Well, how? Do you not want, do you take yourself so seriously when someone says something funny, you can't laugh as well?

2:04:31That's crazy. You're missing out on laughs. You're missing out on your own joy. Like you should have joy about someone making fun of you and you're great at that. You're great at that. It's one of the best things about you on ONA is that when they would crack on you, you would laugh. Yes. It's so important. They were good jokes. They were funny. They were on the time. Yeah. And if I was at times lucky enough to come back with something, then I would. If not, then I sucked. The last time I did Kill Tony a couple of weeks ago and I told a joke and Tony goes, that's the oldest joke in history and I go, yeah, I wrote it.

2:05:08So I said shut the fuck up. But it was gone. It was a great episode because he fucked with me. I took it. Well, Kill Tony is one of the only places left where that kind of fucking with people is like openly encouraged. That kind of fucking with people is like, I mean, and Tony's the best roaster on the fucking planet. He's quick. He's like, no, he's so quick. You think he, just like, no, he's so quick, you think he wrote it in advance. Yeah. He's got the cuff. He does it all the time. He does it in the green room. He does it everywhere he goes. Well, but he has your thing too. He's done that show for a 10 years or more.

2:05:46He's built that muscle in his head. Yeah. Boom. Yep. Yep. It's automatic. I'm just going to come back. Well, when you host a show like that, too, you understand the rhythm of the show, the beats of it. Yeah. And he's so good at letting other people shine. You know, that's what he's really good at. Like he wants you to do well. He wants you. He doesn't feel upstaged if Shane comes on his jump or when Kyle was doing, Kyle did RFK Jr. And he also did Elon Musk. And then who called on again? Yes. Yeah. Fucking brilliant. Fuck. I am fucking brilliant. He's so funny. He is so fucking funny. Yeah. And then he had Adam Ray who did Dr.

2:06:30Phil was fucking amazing and Biden. It's crazy. I did show so good. I did kill Tony twice with Adam Ray. And he's fun to be with. One, they love him. Yeah. They love him. But he laughs and gives you your due too. Like, yeah, I've done radio with Jervase. Jervase is a big laugher. If you say something funny, yes, who laughs and crack up. You know what I mean? And you got to have that. Even it's just, if it's funny, you know, they don't get jealous or get man and go, I'm going to outdo that. They laugh and well, the people that do suck. No one does that. Is any good? What's that? No one who does that is any good.

2:07:10No one's like, oh, I got to do better than him. Yeah, it's stupid. You're missing out on the whole thing. It's not what we're doing. It's a show. It's a show. It's whatever. Hey, I got a piss. Let's come back. We'll come back. This episode is brought to you by Paramount Pictures new film The Naked Gun. There's comedy. And then there's The Naked Gun. It's in a league of its own. If the trailer is anything to go by, this new film does not hold back. Liam Neeson is Frank Treben, Jr. son of the celebrated police squad lieutenant from the original films. Let's just say you've never seen Neeson like this, nor Pamela Anderson or Paul Walter or Hauser, a must watch on the big screen.

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2:09:14So I heard... You heard... The stem cell... I can't do stuff for a couple weeks. You can do things. Golf? Yeah. For sure. With the stem cell? Yes. Of course. If it gets shot into me Wednesday... What's tomorrow? Tuesday. I could play golf Thursday. Yes. What about the BPC? Yes. Oh, really? Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You just can't lift heavy weights all night. Oh, I'm not going to lift heavy weights. That's all it is. I don't tear it apart while it's building back up. That's the whole idea. Don't aggravate it. Does that hurt when you do that? No. Then don't worry about it. Not really. It'll be fine.

2:09:53No. No. Well, you should be doing rehabilitation. You should have already. I'm looking at your shoulders right now. They'll look at the fall part on their own. You got to exercise. If you're having injuries with your shoulders and the muscles around them and people are telling you to strengthen them, you should listen to those people. They're right. Well, no. I listen. I went to physical therapy for my back and it's working. So why wouldn't you do it for your shoulder? Because I was waiting to do this. It first. That was healthy. All of it would help. The more muscle you have around your shoulder, the better it is.

2:10:24It was only two or three weeks ago. We said, go to physical therapy. I go, well, he wanted to cut my shoulder. I said, I'm not cutting it. I'm going to try the BPC in a stem cell. So you can definitely heal soft tissue injuries without surgery. The real issue is when tendons are separated and they need to be re -put back in place and reconnected. That's the real issue. A lot of people tore rotator cups. Oh, yeah. Tear rotator. Yeah, I had a torn rotator. I think I did it. I was doing upright rows with 50 pound kettlebells. And I think that was too heavy or too much. So you got to train a rich?

2:11:01I got a trainer. I'm doing all right. I mean, I know I don't work out. No, but honestly, you need some help. Nothing wrong with some little bit of help.

2:11:15Look, do you want to get better or not? Yes. Okay. You need a professional. You shouldn't get a trainer for my shoulder or for my shoulder for everything, for all of it. So someone should show you how to do it right. So you're not hurting yourself. Well, I think I'm doing triceps and biceps, right? I know I am. I'm doing latched, right? Show me the guns. Well, they're not. Then how do you think you're doing them right? They're not bad. That's ridiculous. What? Small? It's tiny. Well, listen. It's there. I mean, you can see it. It's hard, isn't it? My chest is nice. You want me to do my chest? Do you want to see my chest?

2:11:50No, I'm good. I'll take my chest out. No, no, no, no. There's no reason to do it. My lats and traps are good. Okay. Look, for almost 68, I think I look better than most people I went to school with. That's good. I think, I think, look, I work out all the time, but I maintain. Okay. I maintain. I'm not, I feel like a therapist. I feel like I'm helping you through your life. You are helping. I mean, you got in here. You are helping. I'm helping the guide you. No, get a fucking professional that knows how to work out and build yourself back up to the point we don't not having these kind of injuries.

2:12:27Yeah, and rehabilitate it like, correctly. Like when they tell you to do physical therapy in your shoulder, fucking do it. I'm gonna do it. I want to see if you waited three weeks or six, D .A. You only have a few years left. Fixed out. What the fuck? Come on. I only have a few years. So well, do it. No, you want a few years left and fucking working order. Fucking listen, Bonnie. I mean, you should listen to Bonnie. You're right. I'm gonna fucking do you think I'm never gonna get my arms bigger than that. That's ridiculous. Of course you could. At 68, you get your arms bigger. Yeah, 100%. Yeah.

2:13:09The reason why your arms existed all is because your tissues regenerating. Your tissue is, you're healing and you're getting better. Yeah. You 100 % can get stronger. 100%. No ifans or butts about it, you get stronger. I have a knife latch. You can be 87. Yeah. Still get stronger. As long as you're alive, you can get stronger. Because if your heart beats, if your hormones work, if you can move around, that means your body can repair itself. Well, I won't do, uh, what is it that gets you hard? Viagra? No, no. The... See Alice? No, not the drug that makes you to stosh your own. Yeah, to stosh your own.

2:13:57What's it called? To stosh your own. You won't do that? Well, because it makes it, it leads to prostate cancer. No, it doesn't. That's what my doctor told me. Your doctor's wrong. He died. It's incorrectly. Your doctor's in it. He died two years. He died it. He died two years. No, he doesn't know the real studies. He doesn't know the real studies. Like there's a guy named Brigham Bueller who runs ways to well, who could explain the flaws in that study that show that it gave people prostate cancer. Like people get prostate cancer. Testosterone's not giving you prostate cancer. But it's like across the board, the same percentage of people that take testosterone or don't take testosterone, get prostate cancer.

2:14:36There's probably a ton of variables. A lot of it has to do with diet. A lot of cancer has to do with diet. Fuel of cancer is sugar. Do you eat a lot of sugar? I stopped for a year. I'm back. I'm going to get back on. Let's go. I eat pretty fucking good. For the last month and a half, I haven't. For the last month. For a year. Yeah. There's environmental factors. It's genetic factors. There's a lot of different things. But if you want to take care of yourself, testosterone will actually make your body heal better. You'll feel better. You'll have more energy. Your immune system will function better.

2:15:11Everything will work better. You should have your hormones balanced. Like this is, we live in a time where you can get a full blood panel and find out where your nutrient levels are. And if you do it with a good doctor, what they'll do is they'll adjust your diet and your nutrients first. And then see, like, in a couple months, what your levels are then. And then find out how much are you sleeping? Are you sleeping right? Bad. Well, there's a problem there because then your body's not recovering. So you've got to figure out a way to adjust something in your life to make you sleep better. And then after that, once they get everything all worked into its optimum, you're doing all the right things to go, what are your levels now?

2:15:49Okay, we'll add a little. Add a little bit of testosterone. Peptides that'll increase your body's ability to promote growth hormone. There's stuff like Somoreland that makes your body produce more growth hormone. So your body repairs itself better like when you're younger. So there's all rigorous science behind all this stuff. It's all there's many stuff. I'll get Brigham to explain it to you. He'll do a much better job than him. Who's that you got tomorrow? He's the guy who owns Waste Well. Yeah, he's been on the podcast. He's testified in front of Congress. And I bring the disc with... Bring the maps, too.

2:16:19Who'll love the maps? Let me tell you something about these maps. These maps. I printed this shit out. I see. I... It looks like your printer needs ink. Pressure. Dear fucker. Pretty dull. Listen to me. Listen to me. Fix your eyes. Let me tell you what. Pretty good. You want to see some other statistics I can. All right. What else are you going to do? No, I don't want to get to do this. Please don't. Do you see the book? Those girls land today? The Blue Origin. They shot that metal dick up into space. People were mad. They wouldn't let the ladies drive. Yeah, Perry and someone else. Katy Perry, Lauren Sanchez, Jeff Bezos' wife.

2:16:52If that thing blew up and if Jeff Bezos' wife blew up, whatever. Twitter thinks that the capsule is too clean. They don't think it was real. Obviously. Of course, Twitter doesn't think space is real. There's a whole community out there. Hashtag space is fake. Yeah, there's... Oh yeah, there's really retarded people. They think the earth is flat and that there's a firmament. Look at that. They think birds aren't real. Did they land? Is it over? Yeah, yeah. They did it. Yeah. How did they land in the ocean? No, in the desert. How did they land? They did the parachutes. They land with parachutes.

2:17:28So the thing lands with the parachute? I'll show you video. Oh yeah, let me see. I want to see the video. Oh, that's them in the middle of the desert? Wow. No, it doesn't. It looks different than that. That has to be crazy. Would you do that, Rich? Would you go to space? Probably not. I don't need it. You think you get anxiety if you're in space? I don't even like Ferris wheels. Well, those two things are very different. Is that it? You know what? Let's see the landing. Oh. People get this stuff in there. How long did they go for? Very soft, soft landing. Look at this. Here it is. Imagine from space and the only thing we got to land you is a parachute.

2:18:12Like one of the oldest technologies. Wow. You can hear them in there. Who was screaming? Wow. How long? How long were they up there? I don't know. Not long. Isn't it funny that they screamed? Do you think the men with scream like that? Would you and I scream like that if we landed? Well, I don't know about you, but I know me. Look at that one. No, look at that. Go back. One below it.

2:18:41I'll tell you what I'll never do is clap when a pie has a land. You don't do that? That's just fucking job. That's true. What if it's a female pilot? You're like, whew. I wouldn't have gotten on the plane. No. There was a bunch of them in a row where I was like, Jesus Christ. The Delta one in Canada where it flipped upside down. Yeah, can you imagine? The lady just started landing planes recently. Like, yeah, take that one out in the icy runway. Here's 30 ,000. No, I'll wait for the loss. Blue origin declined to say how much the flight cost or who paid for it. Trip came two months before Sanchez and Beijos to marry and then all they're going to marry in Venice in two months.

2:19:20Oh, they haven't married yet. Oh, okay. I thought they were married. That's hilarious. They're going to do it in Venice. Oh, how beautiful and romantic. Wow. Yeah, quit. You can't tell people how much it costs. Because then there's going to be retards. Like, that money could have housed so many houseless, so many unhoused could have benefited. How many poor people? There's like these fucking retards. Like, if Elon Musk gave a million dollars to everyone on earth he'd have money left over. There's all these mathematicians out there that are fucking constantly want to comment on other people's money.

2:19:56How convenient. And those people would fuck up that money too. It's all the rich people or the problem. Not me on which, but I'm not as rich as the richest people. So everybody rich to me is a problem. Fucking house too. All these people. All these fucking people. He's the one. Yes, I own three homes, but I'm a United States son of a and I would hear more with millions and millions of dollars but everyone richer than me is the problem. It's a rich rich rich people. Not the regular regular rich. Oh, that tour. There's so many. Here in AOC. Wondering. Yeah, tax the rich. Remember, share that fucking dress you want.

2:20:34Tax the rich. How about the fuck off? What are you going to do with the taxes? That's the problem when when when doge is uncovering 250 million dollars it was spent on animal transgender studies where you're fucking chopping the dicks of mice and turning them into pussies. Fuck off. Fuck off with your tax the rich. How about you fix the world without taxing the shit out everybody? How about you get rid of it? There's other ways. I can't even tell you what I sent the other day to the other rest. It's just fucking and I'm, you know, just a regular fucking, you know, so much money. I'm like, what's the point?

2:21:10Well, they're complaining about Elon. Elon doesn't pay taxes. Elon paid more taxes last year than any human being that has ever walked the face of this nation. That's a fact. So shut the fuck up. It's like there's never it's never enough. And people that don't have always look at people that do have like age where you could do with that money. Well, you could do with your money. You fuckhead. Well, you won one percent in the world. Do you know what it is? If you're a one percenter in the world, you know what it is? 34 ,000 dollars a year. No. Yes. If you make 34 ,000 American dollars a year, you were in the top one percent of planet earth.

2:21:52Get the fuck out of that. Oh, because you're comparing it to the rest of the world. Yeah. All of the planet. Yeah. The whole planet. Of course. Most people are dirt poor. Yes. Most people. So all this bullshit about what you could do the money. Well, you're saying that from your fucking Manhattan apartment where you're ubering all over the place and getting fucking takeout. Shut your mouth. Listen, when I was in Cabo working there, it was amazing. You drive to the airport. People are living in fucking Shaxe, there. Yeah. It's it's horrible. It's horrible. But look, and it's the sounds narcissistic.

2:22:32I came from a major, major drug addict. And I turned my life around. It's all you got to find a way to do what you can for yourself. I don't give a fuck where you are. I grew up with dudes from heroin addicts to people with five kids at fucking 22 or whatever. And a lot of people made it out of there and found a way to be successful. Yeah, you can look at it that way. But the point is like looking at people that are uber successful and telling them what they should do with their money is just the dumbest shit. And that's why I don't want to give out how much money it costs to fly this rocket ship in the space.

2:23:14Of course, it's frivolous and gratuitous. Of course, it's a publicity stunt. They had a bunch of hot ladies. They flew them off in the space and then they landed, yay. Now you've been in the space. But basically you're in space for like 10 minutes. That's what the flight was. It probably cost a billion dollars to fly people in the space for 10 minutes. Wow, dude, how many fucking clubs you could have bought me? How many golf clubs? How many golf clubs? That's your thing, right? You're just a fucking inveterate golfer, right? I love golf. If you want to find me, Jamie should show you his setup back there.

2:23:47Yeah. He's got a driving computer with a big screen. I was hitting it in this morning into the screen. You bring a screen with you? I just wanted to hotel. Really? Yeah. That's amazing. Yeah, Thompson. I went down, worked out twice. Should take it for a stand. No, I'm not standing. I walked over there and used our screen. Really? Yeah. No shit. Yeah, I bought my clubs. Yeah. And plus this isn't live. You and Jamie should fucking have a little driving contest. I think Jamie. I played with him in Tony before. We played together? Yeah. Oh, oh, years ago, like two years ago. With me, you and Tony, right?

2:24:25Yeah. Oh. You won? Yeah. How good do you play? How good is Jamie? I don't recall. I mean, I'm not good either. So it probably I shoot anywhere from 82 to I want to break a club. I don't know what any of those numbers are. 82 is pretty good sometimes. I've shot in the 70s. How is it? Pretty good. Yeah, very good. Pretty good. I shot. I played. The 318 holes. Yeah. When I was a kid, the guys who golfed all the time were the guys who weren't paying as much attention to their career. I remember thinking like a lot of these guys are kind of stagnant because they're golfing all day. Yeah. They were got all in Boston.

2:25:00Those guys were golf all fucking day long. Get hammered. That you can walk with? No, guys. But I started out with the golfers all wound up spending so much time playing golf. I thought I was like, wow, that's a big distraction. You should have some activities, but the golf is like how many hours? Four and a half. That's a lot of hours. It's a lot of hours, but also two. It makes you disconnect from all the bullshit that's going on. That's a good part. You don't have to deal with whatever. You know, you golf for comics too. So you get some shit. Oh, yeah. Some. Yeah. I think I'm going to golf. If I can't after I get these shots Thursday with Aaron Berg.

2:25:42I think I'm going to golf for sure. Yeah, you definitely can. You can golf on Thursday for sure. Golfing is not going to fuck it up. It'll be sore for a day or two after you get the injections. Yeah. You'll be fine. We're going to clean you up, Rich Foss. Clean up your life. Thank you. We're going to do it. You're going to check in with me. I'll tell you what to do. Look, I'll show you my chest. Don't do it. I'll show you a picture. I don't care. So you're saying from here on. Yeah. You're not saying, what, what are you going to, you're going to impress me with your chest? That's crazy. Well, you said I got small arms.

2:26:18I got to say, well, I got to let you say you're big. I never want to say you're good. Your triceps and your biceps are good. That's crazy. Listen, let me explain something to you. Okay. It's like a waffle neck. Waffle neck. Is that bad? No, I call my kids that. It is waffle neck, man. It's just like I call them chicken head. Okay. You're right. They're not big, but they're hard. And you're not flabby. Yeah. You're going to fall apart. I'm not, I'm not some flabby. Congratulations. What the fuck? You want credit for being okay? Yeah. Yeah. That's crazy. No, whatever happened to Mr. pull yourself up by your boots, straps, get your shit together, and whatever that all that talk.

2:27:04You barely do anything. You're like, you're okay. I work out six days a week. I lift. Do you? Yes. I have a nice gym in my basement. Do you think if I worked out with you, I'd be impressed with the effort that you put forth? Not in the least. That's it. No, no, no. I can do, I can, I do 500 crunches. That's amazing. I do zero. I don't do any crunches. What do you do? Sit ups? Yeah, I do a lot of different stuff for us. Do you do planks? No, I think planks are nonsense. So do I. I don't uncomfortable. It's hard to do. Don't get me wrong, but I think in terms of an exercise for your core, it's kind of nonsense.

2:27:43I think you should do things. First of all, you should almost always do things that have a range of motion. Like when you're, I like to do things that make my body work as a unit. So all the app exercises that I do, I do a lot of different things for apps. I do reverse squats, you know what those are. You put your ankles, strap your ankles to a cable machine, you lay on your back and you pull towards you. Oh, I know. I do those. Well, I got one of those machines where I put my knees in it and I pull up to get the bottom. Okay. Yeah, that's good. Those are good. Sure. Those are good. Anything where you work your whole core.

2:28:22And then you've got to also do the opposite side. Back extensions. Yeah, I do it on that thing. I show you. Show me. Yeah. I'll do back. Because and I got to lose another 10 pounds again. I gained a back joint, but it comes and go. And because I have lower disc problems and, you know, I'm getting a sciatica. So whenever I lose weight, I mean, much better. Yeah, I could tell by when we got on that stretching machine the dex, your body doesn't go all the way down. It's tight. Your lower back is very tight. Oh, I'll go in there right now and go all the way down. I was just doing it. Just, no, I'm saying there's tension.

2:29:04Yeah, you see how my body hinges? Yeah, my body just hinges. It just goes down there. There's no tension. Yours is like, you stop like right there. You probably could go all the way down, but your body doesn't want to. The point is this tension in your lower back. Well, I've never used that machine too. It was my first time. My first excuses. Do you stretch? No, I'm stage if they need it. Do an extra 20. I've done it two hours. If DL Eugley and I'm middleing and he's coming four hours late. Back in the day, I was working to Caroline's and I was open for DL. And, you know, I'm doing all my good stuff up front.

2:29:42Oh, no. And then they go stretch. And they go stretch. I'm going, what am I going to do now? He wasn't there yet. No, he wasn't. It's kind of worse feeling the world. Walking in with it. You did all your best material and then tell you to stretch. Like, I don't have any scouring your brain. You're scouring your brain. Well, luckily for you, you could work the crowd. Yeah. So, I know what was the question. Am I doing? Do I stretch? Yeah. Yeah, I do for my back. I have this extra, I light it down. Yeah. And I pull this back like that. That's good for my lower back. You know what that is? Do I know what it is?

2:30:18You know what I'm talking about? Yeah, yeah, yeah. I know what you're doing. I'm doing my lower back. I'm doing my back. Crossing your legs and leaning forward. Yeah. And I pull it back. Right. And then when I'm doing sit -up, crunches, I'll do it either on that machine or I'll pull my legs this way too. Get my lower. I'm going to try to move my, oh my god. First of all, I know the crew you have come in here a lot of them. None of them work at it all. All right. A lot of them do. Who doesn't work at it all? Name one. No, I don't want to name again. Shane. Are you? Are you? Are you? Okay, dear Swine.

2:30:55That's true. Mark Norman. I don't know if Norman works out. Mark Norman definitely works out. Oh, he does. He runs. He can do a lot of pull -ups instead of sitting. From audience. He loves, you know what I like talking to Mark? He loves comedy. Oh, he loves it. And he knows the history of it. But he knows the history of it. Like he, like you'll talk to comics now and go, oh, Steve Lannisburg was funny. I just, who is that? Or, look at him. Come on, man. Of course he works out. Oh, shit. He's ripped. He's ripped. I don't like that. How dare you? That, now you feel bad. Now I've heard. You feel bad.

2:31:31It hurts me. It hurts me. Yeah. You talk shit and he looks great. Oh, fuck. You're talking shit. He looks like a male model. But guess what, Jamie? He's not holding up a newspaper. We don't know when that was shot. Who cares when it was shot? You never looked like that. Yes, I, oh yeah. What are you going to do? Take your clothes off. No, I'm going to take a picture. Look at, he looks fucking good there. Yeah, he does. He looks good. So this is why he's god damn it. Yeah. Look at that. Right there. He's got boxing gloves on and a knife on. He's in shape, man. You're incorrect. All right, we love him.

2:32:00He's so bad, right? No, I don't. Shane works out. He's here all the time. This is not working out. We worked out. He ain't works out. Yeah, he comes in, uses the gym. We work out together. We put your glasses so you can find your abs.

2:32:16Let me flip. Hey, baby. Hey, baby. He's going to come where? All right, listen to me. I can. You are looking for your glasses. Are you going to find a photo of you looking good? Forget about that. That's the past. Let's concentrate on that. Let's concentrate on it. Put away the cookies. Put away the sugar. Listen to your doctor and tells you to rehab your shoulder. Get yourself in shape. Can't believe we're doing this. You know people who are listening, they can't see this. I, I, they couldn't see the picture of him either. Yeah, but I mean, this you being on your phone here, looking for a photo of back in the day when you looked reasonable.

2:32:51This was recently. How long ago? What happened? What happened? Oh, fuck. Oh, Jesus. Look at you. They look good there. There you go. Oh, not bad. Okay. You look pretty good right there. What happened? It's not that bad now. How long ago was this? 2018. Oh, that's pretty recent. That's pretty recent. Yeah. Pre -pandemic. A lot of people fell apart during the pandemic. That's what happened. And then I came back on track for a year. A whole year. And then just January when I was in Canada. Oh, Canada did you? Canada for me. Communism. That's what. Yeah, it's what. It's not. They may eat poutines.

2:33:37Oh, that's good. Everybody's good. They know it's so good. It's late night. Late night, 15. Just pure heart attack. They have different delis in Canada. Like we used to go to a Montreal. Those, uh, they caught smoked meat. Yeah. It's basically like going to canters. Right? Or going to cats. I've been to a couple of those smoked meat. Oh, phenomenal. But you know, if you, I heard and I know this is true. If you eat too much smoked meat, you can get stomach cancer from that. For more that smoked meat. Who fucking told you that? This guy with stomach cancer. No, not true. Smoke meat is not what it is.

2:34:15There is some connection between burnt meat. Like the carbon in burnt meat and cancer. I think it's colorectal cancer. But I do not know how robust those studies are. I mean, people have been cooking over fire forever. I just don't, I don't buy it. There's a lot of bullshit involved in these studies that tell you that this causes cancer. That causes cancer. Here's what 100 % causes cancer. Urbicides, pesticides, chemicals, forever chemicals that are in your fucking food. That, that paper cup that you're drinking out of when you drink hot liquids out of a paper cup. We got to throw those fucking paper cups we have.

2:34:54Do you have seen what Paul Saladino did when he dissolved the Starbucks cup and shows you what's really at the base of it? It's basically a condom. See if you can find Paul Saladino. Well, you got all those paper cups. I'll take them. No, I saw them today. I poured my crumpy in this. We're going to get rid of all our paper cups. I'll take them. Paper cups for hot liquids are fucking stupid. Really? Because the lining of those paper cups is plastic. So you're basically pouring hot liquid into plastic, which is the worst. Okay. Like look at, see, he shows. So he's dissolving the paper cup and that's what's inside of it.

2:35:26So you think you're drinking out of a paper cup. But it's not really paper. It's plastic. There's a plastic lining. And that's the only reason why those coffee cups from Starbucks hold paper. So hot water to plastic. Give me some volume on this. Our chemical is PFA. Anything in that plastic is leaching into your drink. And leaching into your coffee drink. So do not think you're getting a paper cup. You are getting a plastic cup and you are putting hot water into it. That's a horrible, horrible idea. Look at that. Looks like a condom. What's the solution? Glass jar. Get your coffee in a glass jar or a stainless steel mug.

2:36:02Simple solution. Don't expose hot liquids to plastic like this. A horrible idea for your hormones, horrible for your body. Send this to somebody you know who drinks hot coffee out of paper cups like this and needs to get them out of glass or stainless steel. You think this is a... Yeah, there you go. My wife, she won't drink out. She knows all the shit. She's a reader. She doesn't have money. I try to. She... meditates. She's really good, you know. She's smart. This is weird, super smart. She gets together that it works. It's crazy. It's crazy. It's like, it's like, you know what I hear us to deal.

2:36:33What month... What are we at? April. April. April 15th. 14th. 14th. April 14th. So let's go. April 14th, major. June 30th. I'm back here at the club. I'm my birthday. Okay. So you're going to look good. I'll look... I'll look... All right. I'm going to go to June 30th. We'll take a picture. I'll put it on my Instagram. Take your shirt off. Flex. Not now. No. June 30th. Okay. We'll give you time. Yeah. I want to give you a goal. June 30th. Is that enough time yet? Sure. Absolutely. Two months. Yes. And two months. You can lose 20 pounds of fat and look great. All right. Because eat healthy. Does...

2:37:14Get on a very low carbohydrate diet. That's what I did. I'm not doing keto. I'm not gay. But I went... Killed gay? A little. When I try to cut carbs, let me tell you something. It was easier for me to quit crack than it was carbs. Really? Well, I never gave anybody a hand job for a chiseled roll. So... Part of my act, folks. Don't you see that?

2:37:44I don't know. I don't know how much bigger my arm is. You don't have to speak. Just speak. Look at that. I'm more cut out. But I think I look okay. Well, we're going to give you a blood panel tomorrow too. The final where your hormone levels are at. Find out what the fuck is wrong with you. What do you mean? Oh, that's shit. Blood panel with my... They'll draw blood. They'll draw blood and then send it to a lab. Do you want me to tell you I have cancer? They could if you want to know. No. You don't want to know. I already have blood. Test out my doctor's office. Did your blood... Did your doctor do a comprehensive cancer scan?

2:38:14Did pro... Pro state? Yeah. Does it look to your asshole? That's all they do. No, with the blood. And look at my sugar levels. They can do this incredibly comprehensive blood panel. They draw. They dig a lot of blood out and then they send it to a lab and they find out whether or not you have... I have zero cancer. Super happy. Because when they did it, I was like, I have the same feeling. I don't know if I want to know this. It's a skit. Waiting for fucking... Start thinking about it. It's their mind fucking yourself laying in bed at night. Like, what if I have it right now? What if I find out tomorrow I have four weeks to live?

2:38:45It's fucking too much anxiety. When I went back in the day, everybody like went for the AIDS test after you got... Oh, I remember that. I remember my first AIDS test. So I got my AIDS... Oh, it's so scared. Okay, this is true. My doctor, whenever I went to my doctor and took any test, he would call me and say, everything's fine. They would call, say, everything's fine. Right. So I took an AIDS test. And the doctor didn't call me. And I get a call from the doctor and he said, can you come in tomorrow? I'm going, when do you mean come in tomorrow? My heart dropped because he would have said, everything's fine.

2:39:23I go, what do you mean? Why do you want me to come in tomorrow? He goes, uh, your tooth came in and we want to put your tooth... It was my dentist, but I heard a doctor. I thought it was my real doctor telling me I have fucking AIDS. You know, because everybody took that test in the 80s. When I first got insurance, I had to get a AIDS test in 90s. And I remember the doctor, I said, boy, I'm fucking real nervous about this. And the doctor said, are you gay? I said, no, he goes, do you do drugs? I go, no, he goes, don't worry about it. You don't have it. I go, really? He goes, yeah. I go, what the fuck about the fucking news?

2:39:57Yeah. The news is freaking me out where I'm scared to touch fucking doorknops. Like, how come the news is saying that everybody's going to get a zilz, listen, no one's getting it. Other than gay people and people who are interviewed, interviewed and struck users. Well, people on my block were dropped. We went to see Peeley in the hospital. And all the nurses were wearing masks. So we go, I think he has that thing. Nobody even knew what the fuck to, you know. Yeah, they thought it was contagious. By the way, that was Fauci too. That's Fauci? Yeah. Who's responsible for all that? Fauci was responsible for people freaking out about AIDS.

2:40:33Fauci was on TV back in the 80s, telling people that children could possibly catch it from people. Yes. Yeah. You know the Dallas Bires Club, where they were limiting the medication that gay people could take? That was about Fauci. He was responsible for that. He was the one who pushed AZT on people back then. Why is... AZT was that chemotherapy medication that was killing people quicker than the cancer was. They stopped using on cancer and they repurposed it and started using it on people that had had it. It didn't help you. It was you dead. They were giving it to people that didn't even have any fucking symptoms.

2:41:07They had HIV that had no symptoms. They'd given them AZT. They were dying in months. It was the only time ever in medical history where they were telling you to take a chemotherapy drug indefinitely. Every time you take chemotherapy, the idea is that it gets your body close to death but kills off the cancer. They were telling you to keep taking it. Just keep taking it. It's nuts. What they did is madness. If you read Robert Kennedy's book, The Real Anthony Fauci, it's all about that. In the beginning of it, it's all about the AIDS crisis and all the different things that they did that mirrors exactly what they did during the COVID crisis.

2:41:42So what drugs are they using now? They started using protease inhibitors and that really helped. The whole AIDS thing is very complex. It's very complex because the vast majority of the people that got AIDS were heavy drug users. Heavy drug users or gay guys who are experiencing a lot of different sexual partners. But it was because you're blood being transferred. Yeah, that's part of it. But it's also part of it you're destroying your immune system with fucking drugs. Like these guys were taking Amel nitrate and crystal math and partying and not sleeping. Just crushing their immune system. Plotering needles with the blood going from them.

2:42:18Yep, that too. And then they would get them on medication that would definitely kill them. And then it was a crisis. And then, you know, everybody was running around scared. And I was scared too until I talked to my doctor. He just looked me in the eyes. But no one could say that back then. So this is like 90. Mindy one maybe, maybe 91, 92. When I went away. And when I got my doctor was like, don't worry about it. I was like, what about the news, man? Like I remember talking to this guy. He was a young guy. I was like, why is the news telling me I could get, he goes, heterosexuals aren't getting this.

2:42:51Well, unless you're an interview to drug user, don't worry about it. I only check because I shot dope like maybe three times. It was like, I didn't like it. It's just not, you know, I was more of a, up, you know, what it does shooting dope to feel like. What do you feel like? Just down and I can't, it wasn't. I did it with Bastille and he was a major drug. He was a major one. He was funny though. Frank, he was funny. Did I ever see him for the first time when I was an open -micre in 88? And he was just a wild dude. He was like one of the first guys ever saw what tattoos. All these tattoos and they're like, he does heroin.

2:43:29Everyone knows. Oh, really? It was heroin. When someone did heroin back there and it was crazy. Like what? He does heroin. So now, think about how many people are hooked on opiates. Back then it was super rare. Well, the difference between heroin and like free base, you can function on heroin. There's functioning heroin at like three years. Yeah. Do it. You can function on free base or coke. You got to keep having it. I had a body of mine who was a longshoreman and he would tell me that this guy he would work with and not just one guy. But one guy that he was work with, that he was a friend on his lunch break, get a bag of heroin, shoot it up in his car, sit there for a half an hour and then go back to work.

2:44:08Yeah. They're crazy. You can't do that with free base. It's non -stop. You got to keep. So, does that your thing free base? Yeah, free base, free base. How old were you when you first free based? Well, when I first got high, I was 15. You know, pot and I lead it, led my way up to the get - Get - Get - Get - Get - Yeah, Coke. And then - So, snort and Coke. Should I snort a Coke? Probably when I started when I was 18 or 19, right? And then when he went to the crack. Crack, probably 25 to 28. Do you remember the first time you did it? I think it was with my cousin. Yeah, it was like, I go, this is good.

2:44:48I mean, I guess, there was what, I'll tell you what, so I guess so many. So, my friend, I was on the road, I came back, he goes, look, I'm going to buy an eighth of Coke, cut it into five halves, five half grams. Okay. And we'll do two half grams and I'll sell the other three. I know where this is going. Well, we did one or two, and then he went to sleep.

2:45:22So, this is my job. I found where he hid in. So, he didn't know how hard it goes, you had your money. No. I went in and I was still one at a time. I drove to the convenience store. I cooked it with ammonia, right? Amonia. Yeah, clear ammonia. Wait a minute, you actually cooked the Coke and turned it into crack? Yeah, with ammonia. Why would you do that? Is it better that way? That's how you get free -based crack. You got to process it. You can do it with bacon soda. You can do it in a boil it. No. Who taught you how to do this? I would. Are you a guest? Look how it goes. It's a crack addict. Somebody like other crack addicts were like giving you the recipe.

2:46:05No, I learned it. There's three ways to do it. So, I did it with, or the four with ether, which you could blow up your house. So, I would still have a gram from them. I would go to the convenience store. I'd cook it, smoke it, and pour out the ammonia. I said, I can't do it. Well, how do you do it? I don't want to help. You put it in. It's the internet. It's a chat G .B .T. You'll do it. I'll make a little chat chat G .B .T. Right now. I'll tell you how do you take cocaine and turn it into free -based? You put it in a cheese spoon and you light it and it turns into a rock. Okay. And then squeeze it.

2:46:44You squeeze it and try to get the ammonia out as much as you can in a rock. So, I would pour, I would get the ammonia still a half a gram from him. Uh -huh. Go to the, bright early in the morning. Come back, cook it, pour the ammonia out. Well, now I would chat G .B .T. The chemistry behind it. How it's made? For educational purposes only, not intended to encourage illegal activity. Bacon soda, I said you could do it. Cocaine hydrochloride powder with baking soda and water. Sometimes ammonia is used instead of baking soda but baking soda is more common for crack. Heat the mixture. As it's heated the cocaine bases separate from the hydrochloride and form solid rocks that float to the top.

2:47:25Cool and dry. This is like a recipe. Solid pieces, the crack rocks are cooled and hardened then dried. So, there you go. I emptied out the first bottle. Then it was two or three more half grams. Oh yeah, it was so nice. I went and stole another one. Went back to the convenience store, bought more ammonia. After the fourth trip to the convenience store, I go, hey listen, I got a clean business. We need a lot of ammonia. Why smoke all his coke? And I always find out here, somebody else, fuck! He woke up and saw his coke was gone. How many hours it passed? Probably four. How many trips to the convenience store?

2:48:04Four. And I was just drinking straight vodka. And I'm walking home. Now I'm $250 in debt. I have. And it was towards the end of my career. But as a crack addict? As a drug addict. Yeah. I didn't call it a career. That was a crack career. Well, I think I told this story years ago, but I'll tell it. And he doesn't care because he told it in his book. So me and Frankie are doing a one -nighter. And back then, I had the car. You would pick up an acety improv and then go do the one -nighter in Jersey. Right. So we pick up this comic, Little White Guy, whatever. We go to our one -nighter and we're supposed to drop him off a DM -prov.

2:48:53And I go, hold on, I got to make a stop. And we go up to Spanish Harlem. He goes, what are you doing? I go, my sister lives here. She's not doing well. You know, there's people chasing. There's people chasing people with knives up and down the street. And I go up and buy the crack free base, right? And the kids like, get me home. Take me back to the improv. What the fuck is going on? Right. Or relax. So now we go down to the lower east side. And Frankie gets heroin. And the kid, now Frankie's in the back seat, Ty, enough. Shoot now. Why are you driving? Well, I'm driving. He's in the back. Oh, God.

2:49:34And the kid is fucking scared to death. He's a little like kid. He wanted to be Jerry Seinfeld. We stayed in Spain. Wasn't really? Oh, my God. That was a little like it from Arizona. Do you remember when he first started? He tells the story in his book. And I apologize to him. He goes, oh, don't worry. It's a good story, right? But we kept him hostage. As I'm smoking crack in Frank, he's banging dope. Oh, my God. I heard an auto and George story once. He's working on a club in Jersey. I don't need to name the club. And he leaves the club with the owner's daughter. And they're headed into New York.

2:50:17And there's another guy driving the car. He stops off at Washington Square Park, picks up a bag of crack and starts smoking in the car. And the girl freaks out. And he says, the class can I go, what? I thought the bro had wanted a party. I guess I just did a documentary about him. They interviewed me. They're doing documentary on auto and George. Well, we did a lot of those shows, those prom shows. Yeah. With auto and George. Oh, he was. He was. He was. Genius. I would. Yeah. But I drive with him. And he would go, do you know what George told of today? What do you fucking psychopath? You're gonna make people pull over.

2:51:00So he could go check on George. George is in a trunk. He would pull over and check on George. I think there's something to that. I think that that dummy had a mind of its own. And he might have been, he had some weird personality disorder. We put a personality to that dummy. But that dummy, when that dummy would say things, you knew it was George. Yeah. Like it didn't even feel like it was auto. It felt like George had his own thoughts on things. I worked with a ventriloquist once. And I go into his room on the road. And he's putting away the dummy's clothes in another dresser drawer than his.

2:51:38He's like putting away the clothes of the dummy. Holding the clothes. Here's a bit I kind of want to do. You know, back in the day, you know, when there was bank robbers outlaws, they would wear a handkerchief and go rob a bank. Well, I want to be the outlaw of ventriloquist where I go a little dummy and put a handkerchief this way they can't see my lips move. But I could say I'm the outlaw of ventriloquist. And I could do a whole five minutes. And everybody's going, he must be great. I can't see his lips move. That's good. But you're supposed to talk too. Like the part of the fun of being a ventriloquist.

2:52:20Like you would say auto would say, I can't believe you're saying that, George. Yeah. How do you shut the fuck up? The eyebrows would pop up and you get crazy. It's the banter back and forth. I'll talk behind the mask. I'm not going to do it. I'm just going to work. How come terrible? I do. Okay. So I threw it out. How come there's no ventriloquist on this planet that gets along with their dummies? Well, there's not even very many ventriloquist acts anymore. There used to be a bunch of ventriloquist acts. There was Willie Tyler and Lester. There was an LA. There was a few. There was Vince Nantono in George from Long Island.

2:52:54You know what I think it was? It's like when one guy becomes really big, like Jeff Dunham, he became the man when it came to ventriloquist. And then he's so popular that nobody touches it anymore. Sort of like Carrotop did that to Propax. Yeah. Like Propax used to be, remember when we started out? The fucking wood. Did you ever work with the way he was great? I pulled it in fucking diaper. I mean, laundry basket hoots with fucking props. Oh, he had so much shit. Yeah, he had like a whole trunkful stuff that he would have to carry through. Yes. But they don't have them anymore. Because Carrotop became so famous as a prop act that everybody's like, oh, it's a Carrotop thing.

2:53:31They just abandoned it. Like musical acts. There's no fucking musical acts anymore. There's, there was, they're on ships. Gary Delano was a musical act. But guys who've been around for a long time, they're like the acts. There's no upcoming people right now that are musical comedians. Well, there's no magicians. Far and T was a magician. There was a couple of magic acts. Like when I did One Nighters, you were, it was jugulars. Juggling Jack Swarzy. A couple magic acts. There's a few magic acts still that work in California because because of the comedy magic club. Oh, okay. It hurt her most of each.

2:54:07He used to have it whether you'd have a magician mixed in with the comedy last time I worked there. Well, when I started working there, I was like, I remember. Do you ever remember Chip's coony where he did the fake magic act? No. It was really funny. He would just do stupid stuff. Lennie Schultz was a prop act. There was a prop act. He was a crazy Lennie. He just died. Like about a month ago, three weeks ago. More pigs, Lennie. There were more pigs. And he was just, he was so ridiculous. He was nuts. He was so funny though. And the nicest guy in the world. Yeah, I remember he had a, he pulled out like a smokey the bear doll and he's like, only you can prevent forest fires.

2:54:42He shot the fuck up and he punched the bear. It was so ridiculous. And then he moved on to something else. Like it never happened. It's like it was what he would kill. Kill and it made no sense. No sense. No sense. It was just maniacal. It was just crazy. It's crazy face and crazy eyes. Like it was really funny. Like Carotop is a good prop act. If you like prop acts, he's the best prop act. Yeah. I mean, Rip Taylor didn't like him. But you know, Rip Taylor is from how many fucking years ago. Rip Taylor? Yeah, remember the gay, over the mustache? Yeah, and throw this, he had a glitter and stuff.

2:55:18He didn't like Carotop. Because Carotop was getting real famous at the time. And Rip Taylor was the prop act. But it's like most comics today are just comics. They just do stand up. There's very little like all the variety stuff is gone. Well, Frankie Pacer was a prop act. He killed. Yeah, he killed. Killed. You're right. There was more variety in the one nighters in the clubs. Oh, yeah. Then there is just like one in the 80s, comedy was anything. It could, there was no definition of it back then. Like guys had like pieces of paper they'd bring on stage and hold up signs. There was all kinds of weird shit.

2:55:58And now it's just people talking. Oh, the guy from Boston, I work with him. He was so angry. We did a one nighter. He said, fuck this out of poolhole. Bob something. Batch, uh, he had paper signs. He would pull up and do a thing on signs or whatever. He's just from Boston. Uh, well, there was the guy from the blue collar tour, the Bill Engvaugh. Yeah, he had signs. Diddy? Yeah. None of them say quit. Ah, I don't know.

2:56:31What? I, uh, what do you call it? What's his name? Kills on stage. Josh Adam Myers. Yeah, he does. Kills. Well, he just said, uh, god damn comedy jam. Yeah, he has music too, but that's a little different. But we had him on our show. Would you bang him? We, me and Bonnie do the show. It's fucking, you know the show we do? No, we, what we do is, Bonnie and I host it. And we have like five comics. And they do like eight or ten minutes of peace. Don't we have three female judges and a gay, and a gay judge? And they have to reset. They discuss whether they would fuck them or not. Oh, interesting. And the gay judge is always the funniest.

2:57:14He's always the funniest. But some of these female judges is so funny, you know. So he came out. We did it a couple, we do it at a lot of festivals. And we did it at, in New York, and Josh Adam Myers came out. And he sang the whole time just fucking all over the stage. I'm going, he's got to close every show in the comedy club. Because nobody's following that. Right, right. There's no way. It's different energy that you're going to go up after that. Yeah. What he does is great. What he does is, you know, if you run the road and you had a middle act and the middle act was brought to you by the club.

2:57:54Like they assigned a middle act and the middle act was doing music. You were fucked. You were fucked. Oh, yeah. Fucking guitar. I worked Vegas once following a guy with a guitar. And I had, and he's fucking closing with Springsteen and the bandana on his head. Oh, you're in trouble. I'm going, what the fuck? It's a totally different thing. You know, but it's weird that that's not more popular because he used to be so effective. That's what I'm saying. It's like, why isn't there more of those acts like that out there? Because it was so effective. Well, some of them got older and went to cruise ships that do guitar.

2:58:28I know why didn't the younger ones, why didn't, how come no younger ones emerged? That's what's weird. It is kind of weird. No impressionist either. Very few. That you're impression. Yeah. Very few. And everyone that would turn around, fix their hair, and then either, they always turned around. Right. You know, imagine it. Jack Nicholson. I'd be scared to turn around in the audience left. Turn around. There was so many of Jeff DeHart. He did Rod Sterling perfectly. It is interesting. There's not a lot of just impressionists. Right? Yeah. Danny Stone, Randy Cretico. Yeah. It was very rare. Frank Caleando does.

2:59:13Yeah, yeah. But he's like the only one. You don't really see him in, well, I don't know if he's still in clubs. He does a lot. Yeah, I think he does. He does, he does. Yeah, he was on the virus tour on the open answer. Yeah, I did it with him. Yeah. Oh, you did the virus tour. Yeah, I did. I posted every show. Yeah, I did one of them in Vegas. Oh, yeah. Yeah, the Vegas one. That was the last time I saw Patrice. Wow. Yeah. We joined the benefit. We do it. I hosted every year in Billy Closes it. We're doing it, uh, I think in May this year. Oh, yeah. Yeah. Okay, so it's next month. Do you know the dates?

2:59:49Yeah, I'll tell you right now. Tell everybody's thing. Go buy tickets. Bust out those glasses. I sold out. Let's go. These are dollar store glasses. Why do you buy them at the dollar store? Because my good ones are at the hotel. I don't want to lose them. I don't want to waste them. I don't want to lose them. Yeah, I mean. I would have worn them to go on some Theos podcast. I'm not quite some looking at your face when you turn sideways. I can see how much magnification you got. What are those? How many how many X? 250. That's it. Yeah. Okay. There uh, it looks like I'm seeing a double the size of your fucking look.

3:00:21You got stung by a B. Listen to this.

3:00:27Listen to me. So it's already sold out. So people can't buy tickets. I'm sure it sells out every day. That is beautiful that you guys do that every year. The Patrice benefit. Yeah. It's very cool. You talk about a guy that like touched so many people because he was so brilliant. Why? How could it be on the Sunday? The Patrice space says May 18th in my calendar. Maybe Chris Billy's doing uh, 12 angry men he's playing every fucking character. Uh, no, he's in Gari playing Ross. Oh, is he? Yeah. And yeah, him and his colleagues. For closers. See that guy? I don't know. See the yellow. Go see it. I'd rather fucking walk through Lebanon.

3:01:07Where in a fucking Yama Cup? Go see that fucking angry hack. Fuck off Billy. Shut the fuck up. Send me a stupid pro palisthenium bullshit shut up. Oh, it is. Yeah. A lot of pro palisthenics. Oh, we fight all the time. I'm lying to you. I, well, we, I'm text. We really? I can't afford you go and billburg go back and forth about palisthenium for real. Sometimes. Yeah, sometimes. Yeah. Wow. Yeah. But I'm, you know, look, I'm friends with them for years. Of course. I mean, forever. Yeah. Fucking Billy, you know, fucking. When comedians get political and it's the point where they, they distance themselves with people they don't agree with them, that to me is hilarious.

3:01:48Hilarious and how stupid it is. Like, what are you doing? What are you doing? Like, this is, this is where you're going to fucking draw the line on some shit that barely affects your personal life. I've, I've not. Any of my friends that are like that, I'm still friends with them. I don't agree with a lot of the shit and they're stupid. Yeah. You know, I mean, one or two people I think are say, really vile stuff and I just mute them. I don't deal with them. You know, they're not friend friends. Right. You know, I mean, shit, me and Norton don't agree on everything. You know, how can you? I mean, his fucking.

3:02:28How can you agree on everything? His wife is so much hotter than my wife. Baaaaah. It's got a better dick. She was the best man at his wedding. Baaaaah. Baaaaah. He's fucking. Norton is so quick and funny. It's, he was the best man at my wedding. He's so fucking funny. He's great on his ketotone. Oh my god. He's one of the best guests. I mean, you know who else is fucking. Colin is so funny. He's so quick. Colin's amazing. He's just, there's a bunch of guys and I think I put you in there too that just never really promoted themselves on social media. So it's like you're really good, but like even a tell.

3:03:09Like a tell for the level of comedy that he is, he should be selling out stadiums every night. But he just doesn't promote himself at all. All he does is does like all of his following is just word of mouth. Yeah. And other comics saying how great he is and like people who have seen him before they've come to see him again. Well, he says one of my videos now is up to up to almost 5 million views. Is that good? Yeah, that's good. That's good. It's really funny. I believe it. I believe you're funny. If you want to play, I will. No, we don't. Let's wrap this up. So you're going to be at the mothership.

3:03:44What are the dates again? June what? June I think 27, 28 and 20. I do it every week. I'm going to take pictures of you with your shirt off. That's going on. So prepare for that. Get ready. Yeah. Get yourself in shape. Tomorrow I'm going to bring you to waste as well. Get you on the peptides and okay. You're blood work and find out what the fuck's going on with your shoulder. It's shoot you up with stem cells. I do have a special on Amazon called Rich Force Anonymous. It's pretty funny. Why is it called Anonymous? Because I taped it at an N .A. convention. Oh, that's hilarious. And a backdrop. Bonnie directed at beginning.

3:04:20The backdrop is fucking so cool. There it is. Look at you. Rich Force Anonymous. Look at you. Where's your trail? Dangerous man. You play dangerous. Can you play to trail or? No, we're not going to play a trail. Okay, good. We're going to leave. Okay. I'll wrap this up. No, we don't need to play a trail. Okay, you're funny. I was doing it for you. No. I don't care about me. For you, I'm going to not do it. I'm not even.

3:04:48This, I've done this podcast three times and this is the most fun I had. It was fun. It was fun. We had a good time. I had a good time. Come to the club tomorrow too. Hang out. You got any sets tomorrow? You're going to know. All right, come to the club. Do bottom of the barrel too. There's a whiskey barrel on stage with notes in it. From the audience, you pull them out and you just riff. Oh, really? Yeah, you love it. It's so much fun. It's like a premise factory. So what am I going to do about this thing tomorrow? As soon as we wrap, I'll set it up as soon as we get done here. This was Sean.

3:05:17Thank you for having me. Rich Boss, ladies and gentlemen, bye, everybody.

3:05:32I'm going to go to the club.