#2405 - Luis J Gomez & Big Jay Oakerson

24:28Relaxed you're not even thinking about where to go and how to do it You're just thinking about like locking in and you're gonna be live for an hour and I was like god It's fucking terrifying like let's see what let's see what that feels like did you fuck up anything that we don't know about Nope felt exactly like a regular set I did one set there Friday night that we filmed as well that didn't go live and then the Saturday night one was completely live And it was you know, I had already done the room so I was relaxed I got a feel for the room, you know, because of Friday night. It was a lot of fun.

24:58Show was great. And I was like, okay, we're ready. And then Saturday, just all day going over material watching recordings. I just saturated my brain. So I could just be completely relaxed when I went out there. So it was like 100 % prepared as opposed to like a regular Tuesday night where you could just kind of go on stage. Like, you know, you know your acts, you know, you go on stage, you start opening up and get into your bits, but you're not like meticulously dialed in. I told Netflix that I would do it with crowd work live oh you totally should they didn't even respond to his email I said the same thing they responded they're like we don't want to get sued I told Netflix I would do a feature film for them they just didn't get back to me bro they didn't have to see you one weekend they'd be like are you fucking crazy no again almost like what you're saying though to me it's like I'm not saying that I wouldn't be nervous.

25:54I would be very nervous doing that. And that would be kind of the fun of it, like being that amped up to do it. Yeah, it definitely made it a little more fun. So like, especially with it being crowd work, I was like, you'd see it kind of unfold. You know what I mean? Like you kind of see like the pacing and the build of it because I have to do it for an hour. It'd be interesting. Yeah. And you got to, that's one of the things like you have to be doing a lot of sets leading up to that too to be relaxed. Yeah. They filmed, they secretly filmed because I was filming on Saturday and they filmed my Friday shows without telling me and I fucking killed and that was like the biggest like relief because Bobby Kelly directed it and he was like dude we got it he was like we got the show I thought they were just testing the cameras he just wanted to go home dude we got it dude it's perfect dude you nailed it looks like we're all set yeah once you know you got it in the can then it's lifted off of your back what a weird fucking art form You know very strange don't those are dices cigarettes.

26:54I know Unlit broken he just had these cigarettes and he just breaks them and puts them in there Jay just quit smoking cigarettes, but he needs to smoke cigarettes on the podcast I asked I was like I was like how's he's gonna smoke now I was like was like why he's like it's like three hours, dude And I was like the hours are gonna exist whether we're not podcasting but other than that you would quit smoking Yeah, like stay loose though, you know When I came in when we did the show last time Two times ago at the end of the show I was like I gotta go smoke and Jamie went you can smoke in here I went oh really because yes, and then last time we came and I did smoke and when it was done Call it like wearing lucky underwear or something.

27:33I was like we had a good flip back and forth We were all giant. We made the Rogan's fear Yeah We officially got the Rogan's fear we've been repping hard out there in the streets You should see us we tell everyone I get my credits. I go from the bonfire Legion of Skanks and most notably the Rogan's fear The manosphere is a real subject like the people believe that it's real that this is like coalition of men Like trying to convert young boys into the evil ways of being a man the manosphere I think that's the same thing as the Rogan's fear No The mass it's like there's levels Like Andrew Tate's the highest level of the right of course That's that's top G of the manosphere of course if you're like categorizing those things the thing that you're most terrified of is a guy like Andrew Tate.

28:18I was never stoked on that kind of Maxim. If I'm a young Ukrainian girl. I've never been to that kind of like the Maxim Magazine Spike TV energy of what they're like, this is what guys want to see. A car crash and a girl with big tips in a bikini. I had a Maxim Magazine subscription FHM. The thing about it is, yeah, you're right, but also it works. Why try to reinvent the wheel? No, it definitely works. I pulled myself out of that things I was like this isn't my like getting a maxim magazine like hometown Chicks in their bikinis. I'm like these girls would never talk to me I just have my own by too much self-loathing to be into it So if you can make fancy clothes well, I don't fit in those clothes Like everything was a bummer out of those magazines, so I would just get straight pornography.

29:04Yeah Even you can get those girls no well sometimes I would I'd always buy The three packs and one of them would have to be like jugs or voluptuous magazine in the middle There's always one with a bunch of gross chicks or just straight trans but I Always believe when I was young when I was young going through my dad's I found my dad's porn collection and there was a couple of weirdies in there like a couple of trans or like a local personal ads and then as I got older and started buying the three packs I was like Let's just believe that was the third one. He didn't know what it was, but then why'd you keep it?

29:39Yeah Toss it. Dude, did you see that Don Lemon got in trouble because he said that Megyn Kelly looks trans? It's just a strong jawline. Please Google this to find if this is true or we'll be in trouble. I don't want to get sued by Don Lemon. I believe that he said clockable. Sora works. What did he say? The word was clockable is what I said. Clockable? Yeah. Just pull up the actual thing. But people were saying, oh my god, he's actually using you look trans as an insult. Do you know how crazy that is?

30:17Outspoken LGBTQ ally Don Lemon faces backlash after claiming Megyn Kelly looks trans. Oh, it blew up in his face. I see. You know how funny that is? Oh, didn't that happen with what's her name? AOC just she called she was making fun of somebody for being short some like other like dude and now everyone's like trashing her because she was like you can't make fun of short people. Hey go back to that go back to that what he said it says Lemon said he thought Kelly looked chopped he said I think she looks trans Lemon said in response Lemon's co-host wrapped up the show saying let's end on that note.

31:01That's fantastic. Bro, that editor hates him. There's no way that editor doesn't hate him to say, let's end on that. Clockable's a hilarious thing to call a woman. That is so crazy. But that's, well, also he's gay, right? So he doesn't know that Megyn Kelly's hot. He's just dangerous, like, super smart lawyer hot. Is he out gay? I don't follow anything. He's like an out gay guy. Oh, yeah. Yeah. Dom Lemon's married to a guy. Black guy? I think he's married to a white guy. Yeah. You're not going to put a black guy on your butt. Jesus Christ that's what they do are you sure that's what gay sex is I don't know this is probably the first missus permeated the Rogan's fear you know gay sex would know something about this but so when I was a kid when I was when I was young like there was no online obviously and the first time I ever saw gay porn was a girl that I met at a comedy club I met this lady at a comedy club i was like 22 maybe and uh we go back to her apartment in long island and she goes um gay guys lived here before me and i go how do you know and she goes because they left a tape i go a tape of what she goes it's a gay porn i go shut up and she goes you want to see it i go okay so she puts it on and it's these two guys and this guy pulls this guy shorts down and pushes him up against a tree and just starts sucking his cock.

32:31And I'm like, I got to get out of here. That's how it always is. That's enough for me. I already came. I was like, I didn't know that that really happened. You know what I mean? It was weird, right? The first time, because I moved to New York City when I was 19 and you didn't really experience homosexuality until you're in a big city like that. And the first time I saw two guys like kissing, it looked like aliens. like it was the craziest thing ever and now we're so desensitized to it because everything in the media well because porn we're so desensitized because so many people have seen porn but like seeing gay porn when I was 20 I knew that they had sex I didn't have a problem with that at all but it was the shocking reality of watching a guy just another guy and you're like yo it's jarring no doubt I gotta get out of here yeah it's definitely jarring can I take this tape with me?

33:17I was like that's disturbing it was very disturbing Yeah, anytime you see it, it just looks wrong. It looks like the wrong thing is happening. Oh, shut it off. Shut it off. I can't. They seem to have a fantastic time doing it. They seem to have a wonderful time. Some people like spicy food. Some people don't. You ever seen the movie Fright Night? Probably. The old, or 976 Evil. They were two popular horror movies. I think I remember Fright Night. Fright Night, the one that played Evil Ed, his best friend, the kid's best friend, when times got tough, did gay porn. Man. He got it was like really hardcore.

33:51Okay. It was as jarring as like I said when like China did pornography You're like damn dude. This guy was not in this world And then the girl from boy meets world does porn now aggressive black gang bang pornography gay porn No, no, no, she's it's a girl. Oh, which girl? She was on later seasons of boy meets world I think Maitland Ward her name is such just does pornography now, but like like a lot of it in her butt Whoa. Yeah, yeah, yeah. BBC. Thank you, Jay. It's an industry term. Jesus Christ. That's an industry term. Conversation took a dark turn. Big black cock, nice. Good work, dark turn.

34:29We'll be right back after these messages. Yeah. Porn, I still watch porn here and there, but it's just gotten to the point where it just, every time I watch it and I start jerking off, I feel like this sense of like, almost like if somebody was watching me right now, how pathetic this would look. Yeah. Like you're beating your dick like a monkey. Like somebody probably is watching you probably yeah, there's probably someone's collecting information of you Of how I jerk off yeah for either three your front-facing camera or through the camera on your on your good thing that my facial recognition pictures are this

35:03Take that picture all you want you're not gonna get any doors with that We know that the cameras are on but we still jerk off right in front of our computers. You know what's weird? He's put a piece of tape over it, and I'm like, let him see. It's weird that porn is free, basically. You just go on a website, and you can watch it. But also, they're still making it. Sort of. I think the studios are almost barely making anything anymore. It's all OnlyFans checking out. But even that, just imagine, this is the thing. What I'm saying is, nobody's seen it at all. Why are you making new ones? Like no there's no way there's enough supply for the or demand rather for the supply There's so much porn.

35:45Yeah, it is weird though. I still will go back to like my favorite I was gonna say but also if you if you're pretty genre specific you will see them all eventually Yeah, you've seen Jay's seen everything If you're genre specific, that's such a good quote. Well lobster tube takes me through it alphabetically you see so yeah AI porn is not AI porn um VR porn. Oh, AI porn is coming, bro. Oh, AI porn. You're going to be able to have Art Bell having sex with, you know. Me? You. Finally. Yeah. Louis J Gomez. Finally. They already did the, remember, wasn't that all the Taylor Swift getting, like, gangbanged by the Kansas City Chiefs?

36:22Oh, like the president smacking her ass? They have that already? Oh, yeah. Not gangbanged. They were very good AI pictures of Taylor, and she was just, like, in a crowd. Taylor knows her. There's guys, like, grabbing her ass. It was her like sitting on Trump's lap and it was like they were like actually really good And then Tay Tay they took some pictures of her call her Tay Tay But no, I thought there were her getting like fucked by like the chiefs But I think it was funny. I believe she came out was like everyone. Those aren't me Which is like it's a funny acknowledgement to have to make guys I didn't get gang banged by the Kansas City Chiefs Well, you know some 15 year old girls in school and her friends like yeah, it was real You really did get me like you need Taylor to come out and say it right.

37:06Hey guys wasn't me everybody That wasn't me, but isn't it so I've been reading my dreams that's good now that you can't tell I thought you could tell that's almost the thing I don't think anymore man. I think I don't know why they can't remember the big tell is like fingers hands and fingers This is an ad for better help With the days getting colder shorter and darker It can be tough for many and really you never know what someone might be going through So here's a reminder to take the time to reach out and connect with the people you care about. Whether it's a sibling you see every week or a friend you haven't spoken to in months, you might be glad you did.

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38:16It's one of many reasons why people continue to rate BetterHelp so highly. So, this month, don't wait to reach out. Whether you're checking in on a friend or reaching out to a therapist yourself, BetterHelp makes it easier to take that first step. Our listeners get 10 % off their first month at BetterHelp.com slash J-R-E. That's BetterHelp.com slash J-R-E. Well, it used to be hair, too. They used to be terrible at generating hair. It's like if you watch I Am Legend, like the CGI, it was terrible. Yeah. My mom used to have an I Am Legend poster on a bedroom wall that I assumed she masturbated to.

38:54And then you'd forget the name of the movie all the time not I am. Oh, I'm sorry not I am legend I was thinking of legends of the fall That's very different. It was legends of the fall But I do have a legend tattoo because I forget the name of the movie. I am legend all the time I think they're real close to AI being as Normal looking as any 4k video. I don't think I think they could just We're a couple years away from it being like straight up. You could generate a whole movie. No, but what generation is gonna be genuinely into like consuming and giving a shit about an AI made movie there's something about something still about didn't you even feel like sometimes I go back and watch a little bit older movies and it's good like thank god like the thing the movie the thing John Russell yeah yeah thank god it was like practical effects time still and it wasn't just like because now you're just watching a uh a video game right think about that exactly you can't go back and watch like if you try to watch psycho now right compared to like it just it's not scary when people when psycho came out people were vomiting in the movie theater and they were running out like freaking out you get used to whatever it is like my son can't watch a movie from the 80s really he like he can't hold his attention like whatever so i think as the technology goes on and as we're more autistic as we're doing more and more ai content people are going to get used to it and that's what they're going to be used to consuming just like short videos everyone watches short 30 second one minute long clips now nobody really watches tv shows or movies i mean people are still watching movies i think it's just Like the older people maybe as I'm saying we might be the dying breed of giving a shit about that at all So we'll be like yeah if you can get every star I love and to be in one movie I'll watch it even if it's fake I think you're definitely gonna get people that accept that and you're gonna be able to just generate it instantly with a prompt You know they're doing They do Star Wars scenes that never happened with young Luke Skywalker now.

40:43Have you seen them? Yeah You've seen them right? Yeah, Jimmy put one up just so you could look at it. It's fucking incredible It looks better than the original Star Wars footage right because that stuff wasn't in HD back then and it looks exactly Like young Luke Skywalker and in the exact same voice because they just take the voice from Luke Skywalker from the movies Regenerate it and it could say anything you wanted to it's better than like animated stuff But I've never even been able to follow when they like do animated versions I think there's an animated predator movie coming out that I'll never watch Yeah, it's all just CGI weird stuff It's like that uncanny valley Rick Baker talked about that.

41:21He's the guy that made the American werewolf in London Yeah, he made thriller too that that the werewolf that's in the lobby. That's what that's from And he said when you're seeing something and you know that it's real You know, you know, it's a physical thing he goes it just looks better like you when you're creating Everything with computers your brain knows that your brain knows that's not really a dragon Yeah, that's not really a dragon. But if you make something that actually looks like a dragon It's gonna be even if it's darker and even if it's not as clear it's gonna be way more effective Like the alien movies It's like when I watch a movie and I know somebody in the movie like it's a friend of mine acting It's hard for me to suspend disbelief.

42:00Look at this

42:04This is crazy there's a scene that never happened in any of the star wars movies and you you can generate it with a prompt i guess i would watch it yeah you'd watch it dude because i just especially it was good what a heartfelt speech i just gave to turn around immediately when i saw it go i'd watch a movie look like this yeah look how good that looks like and the alien movies are good example like you go and see like like alien one it's a dude in a suit okay and there's something about the way it moves that it looks like a real thing but then if you get to like later movies not necessarily even in the alien genre but any genre where you have like cgi monsters running around like you know the underworld series like the werewolves were like cgi it just doesn't no it doesn't feel the same at all it's like you're just kind of accepting that this is happening yeah doesn't look as fun they had to use better like cinematography and tricks and sound they had they had to literally be perfect on everything in order to bring it to life whereas like now you can just computer generate anything and they also like hid stuff and it made it scary like the american werewolf in london one of the scariest things about is you don't see the full werewolf for longer than like a second at a time ever you just see it right before it's attacking people you see it right when it's at the bottom of the escalator you don't get a lot of Until later in the movie.

43:31I think in Jaws, right? They don't show the shark until the end. Like the very end of the movie, you don't see the shark. Is that true? I think so, yeah. Do you know they show in the making? I used to watch the making of Michael Jackson's Thriller a lot. More than once? So much. I have a lot of fun facts. Rick Baker was the fucking man, dude. Rick Baker himself. Is the man. He's in Thriller. He comes out of the mausoleum. He's the zombie that comes out of the mausoleum. The shark in Jaws is a total of about four minutes of screen time. with the first full appearance not occurring until one hour and 21 minutes into the film.

44:04That's crazy. If you want to see something funny. It's all music. The tone is like, it's just all, the whole, everything scary about Jaws is just the music. Wow. Spielberg. More Jew lies. The dinosaurs were around 15 minutes. More Jew lies, of course, Spielberg. What'd you say, Jamie? The dinosaurs in the first Jurassic Park are only on screen for like 15 minutes total. That was the best CGI ever up until that point. Oh, that was crazy. Do you want to sound funny? Jamie, if you could bring up Michael Jackson filming the audio while he's in werewolf makeup of changing, and they want him to scream.

44:40He's growling because it's the pain of changing into a werewolf. And they just keep going back and forth. He's not officially a werewolf, right? He's a cat, isn't it? It was the official statement from the director. Yeah, he's like a werecat or something. Whatever he's doing, while he's changing, they keep bouncing back from the sound booth to the actual video Where it's like he's changed oh And then in the booth he's going Oh It's So goddamn funny

45:12It's definitely Music videos used to be the shit That's when he said get away I jumped from the couch to a living room Yeah, it scared the shit out of me Cuz also I'm like Michael Jackson my hero you hear it that's Rick Baker

45:28Can you find the scene in thriller where he becomes a Were cat or whatever the fuck he is because it's not really a werewolf right? It's yeah, I think they officially came out and said it was like a cat-like creature. Yeah I mean it was such a good fucking video man. Do you remember? It's earlier in this Yes, or it's it's how old were you guys when this came out? This was before your time, right? This would have came out in like 88 maybe? Yeah, so you were a little kid. I was six. Yeah, I was in high school when this came out. I think it was when she's getting scared. I'm so sorry. I'm talking over.

46:03No, no worries. It's right there when he's changing, yeah. What year is this, Jamie? 83. Yeah. 83. Oh, wow. Wow. Look at that thing. Back up a little bit. Yeah, here.

46:28Wow Yeah, it's in this Rick Baker As we live and breathe

46:42It's like, does that exist still? Would they create this sort of image To even do this anymore? He would full face foam rubber appliance. We're going to have bladders and a little mech.

47:04Yeah. This was actually kind of shitty. This was as shitty to do to kids as Miley Cyrus punching her fucking pussy on the MTV Awards that one year. Did she punch her pussy? Oh my God. She punched it? My daughter was right in the wheelhouse of being a Hannah Montana fan. And then one year we were watching the MTV Awards and she was like, Miley Cyrus. And she came out Robin Thicke and she just kept having her number one finger and she keeps like ramming it in her snatch. And I was like, oh, hey. And then I became a Miley Cyrus fan. What was that? And my daughter was not allowed to be a fan anymore.

47:40Yeah, that was like a borderline good movie was a thriller. Yeah, man. It's like 20 minutes. That scene, the transformation scene, when he turns around and his eyes look weird. So good. It's fucking amazing. It's so funny. Michael Jackson is the one guy who it's basically confirmed that he fucked kids. I don't think that's... It's not confirmed? No. Is it not confirmed? Hold on. Let's watch this. I definitely want to talk about it. Get away!

48:21It was heavy for a kid.

48:27She would have already run. She's screaming for so long.

48:40Meow.

48:50Ola Ray, the girl who plays the girl. Fun fact. You got him screaming? Ola Ray, fun fact, did Playboy, full bush. Wow. Full bush. It's funny because this is so corny today. But back then it was like legitimately good. We were like wow that looks so real People are so dumb in the 80s. We were like that looks so real. Oh, it did This whole scene where he it goes from that to like him being a zombie Fucking amazing man. It was like a movie and a good one And he's dancing It's looking so cool I know we can't play the music. I really didn't think it was cool. Did you find the screaming at all Jamie?

49:38I'm sorry, man

49:42So fucking just scooch up to where he becomes a zombie

49:49Yeah, he's betrayed her twice in this video. I know it's men they're real problems And then the message of this is that the most famous dance ever yeah I used to do it for my great-grandmother, Selma Eisenstein. She didn't love it. This is probably some sort of conspiracy theory. But this part, though, I could still nail today. If there was more room in here. Jay, please. If there was more room in here. I want to see you do that part right now.

50:23The thriller dance. I always thought that. By the way, the story of this is he betrays her twice. In the movie, he lures her out when he knows it's going to be a full moon. turns into a werewolf and hunts her. It's about to be a third time, by the way. No, exactly. She goes for it in two seconds. He goes, hey, what's going on? She goes, oh, I must be crazy. And then he fools her yet again. Third time. This chick, at this point, she deserves whatever she gets. That's how the devil works, Big J. Yeah. Look, right there. By the way, inconsistency. He doesn't turn back into the zombie. He's now going to be the werewolf from the movie.

50:54Weird. Yeah. Yeah, it's a lot of different things. They threw a lot at you. And then Vincent Price. So he didn't fuck kids. So, here's the thing. I don't think it's confirmed, but I'll tell you what. This is why I'm saying that. A lot of his boys, he dance good. You know, the doctor that went to jail for providing him with that propofol, that doctor said that he was chemically castrated when he was young, which is why he kept that voice. Which also, it kind of makes sense when you look at his physique, right? Because he was, like, very slight. And if you look at his brothers, they're all, like, way bigger guys.

51:27I don't know if the doctors telling the truth, but if he was that's not an unprecedented thing They used to do that with less. They used to do that with opera singers. They used to do that with opera singers It's called a castrata. Yeah, yeah, but I don't think either that there's a there's like Like anal sex accusations on him or stuff like that. I think it's all like touching and yeah I was like it could be together It could be inappropriate behavior First of all, he became famous when he was like six years old and became like the most famous person ever. Like, you're going to get fucked up.

52:00Yeah, it's like suspended. You see it happen. Suspended childhood. With, you know, Britney Spears now. And who else is the other one that's kind of going crazy? Oh, Ariana Grande. She's like, if you watch interviews with her now, she's going to be a wackadoodle, Michael Jackson, Britney Spears type in the future. Guaranteed. She's like all like. This episode is brought to you by Activision. You know me. I love a bit of action. That's why I'm excited to announce that Call of Duty Black Ops 7 is coming soon. And let me tell you, this game is going to be the biggest Black Ops ever. If you're into intense action, strategic gameplay, and just straight up kicking ass, this is it.

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54:47Terms apply. She talks like a fairy. It's crazy. I saw that one with her with the other lady from Wicked. And then there was a lesbian saying you guys are holding space. And everyone's like, what the fuck are you guys talking about? Who talks like this? It's fucking crazy. Did you see a lady? There was some backlash because a lady made like a mock-up. I guess the wicked playbill Wicked is really good by the way. The movie's amazing. Ariana Grande and that lady the other lady But the playbill What's her name? Wow, you knew Ariana Grande No, no, no, no Wildly inappropriate I call her Nose Ring Bald Head Oh, that's her Indian name Me?

55:32I call her Nose Ring Bald Head Oh my god. But she, there was a, so the playbill for the movie or the show on Broadway is a silhouette of the Wicked Witch and I guess Glenda like whispering in the ear but like really covering the face. Her own face. In the movie poster it's clearly Ariana Grande whispering in the ear of the lady who plays a nose ring bald head. And then a lady made a mock up of the movie poster as the playbill, so like shadowed out the witch and moved Ariana Grande's hand to cover the face. And it got all this backlash because that lady was like, I'm a proud black woman, you cover my face in this thing.

56:17And she was like, no, I was just making it like that. And then she got all this backlash and she removed the post eventually. Oh boy. She had to take it down for a thing. She was like, I just thought it was a fun mock-up to make the movie poster look like the playbill. And it's like, once again, putting a black woman in the background. I don't know if that's what was going on there. Come on, nose ring bald head. Well, here's the thing. This ain't the way you're supposed to act, nose ring bald head. Everyone loves the movie. In order for you to act in that style as well as they did, you've got to be a little crazy.

56:48You're going to pretend you're a fucking witch and you're flying around destroying everything. And you're doing it really well. You're probably a little kooky. And if you want that talented, you're going to get kooky. And if you give kooky the reins to you know to do those kooky interviews where they're talking about holding space and Like that was kind of like we grew up at a time where it's like you'd hear about like a director like coming in and like Assaulting an actress in order to get the scene out of her Like punch her in the face like alright action And it's like Steve McQueen did that Yeah, dude, whatever the woman he was dating in that movie There's a scene where she didn't know that he was gonna hit her and he just starts smacking her around and it's what it was her name Ally Ally McGraw.

57:32Oh, yeah, I think they were dating at the time and He smacks this shit out of her like for real for real to get the shot. Yeah

57:44She's to turn up in celebrity sleuth magazine when I was younger big nips Bro, he's really slapping her. This is real. And so she's actually really freaking out Because he just beat her in front of cameras. This is acting. This is why I want to become an actor What is was that in translated in Russian? It's like a famous scene like uh, it's like Russian The little kid who's like crying on the porch In Russia there's a story of triumph. I was like, why do those slaps sound fake? He gave a Russian version of it. Dub sound, too. It looked good. It was just widescreen. That sound was terrible. It was like hitting a wooden box with a bat.

58:30Jesus Christ. But, yeah, he smacked the shit out of her for real in that scene. There was a scene where, I don't know what movie it was, but it was a little kid who's crying on a porch. And the director told the kid that their parents were dead or something. Maybe they told him that their pet was dead or whatever to get the kid crying But it's like that was great movie making that was real yeah, that's the Stanley Kubrick and What's her name when he played Wendy in The Shining? Was she ever naked in anything? Shelley Duvall Shelley Duvall no no no he would freak her out He would like be shitty to her to get her like all frazzled really talked about it famously in interviews She didn't like it at all.

59:06She doesn't look back on it like oh, we did we had to get the movie She was like, I think he's a bad person Jesus Christ didn't she retire she liked it was like yeah yeah a few more movies and like fuck this yeah basically you could play olive oil or scared lady who lives in a tucked away winter yeah I just I just saw her in something recently did she die recently yeah yeah yeah but she's yeah she's more just here she's like a crazy old woman now like yeah she's missing a tooth yeah it was good yeah poor women we just get better with age women fall apart business that business it's like only a certain number of jobs for old ladies and Faye Dunaway takes all of them.

59:44Isn't it interesting? I'm trying to think of like the most contemporary I could think of like change and seeing somebody go from like can do no wrong gorgeous to like a lady now is Pam Anderson. Yeah. No she's doing a good job at it. Like Meryl Streep. No no she's doing she's actually doing a great job but there was a like a out of the limelight for a while and then showing back up major difference in her looks. Right. Well, she gave up on makeup. But she left the public spotlight like Kid Rock's girlfriend and then came back like a grandmother. Age appropriate. Yeah, yeah. I think they should be age appropriate.

1:00:20You see like Dolly Parton now and she still looks like she's 35 years old. Oh, really? Yeah. She's dressing like she's 35. No, of course. But she's still stuck in this sort of big hair and makeup and big fat titties. She comes from fucking way, like 60s and shit. You're 104 years old. Just get old already. Well, I think the thing is if you're a woman and you a lot of like the value that you bring to a conversation is that you're unbelievably beautiful. Like people are excited to talk to you. And then whatever else you have to say is just a bonus on top of it. But if you're really hot, people just want to talk to you.

1:01:01And then you get to a point in your life where that just stops. So like your life's focus has been about being attractive looking great, you know being really fit looking hot So you walk in the room. Oh my god. Look at her. She's a firecracker and then that just goes away And if your whole life is based on just that one thing and you don't pivot to something else like okay Let's just find a hobby. Let's just try not to be hot at 80 You know, did you see the substance? That's kind of the substance That was great. Great movie, man. But it's so funny. Whatever the message of the movie was, what got me was by the end of it, she wasn't bad looking at all.

1:01:42She looked really great for her age, but still just didn't want that at all. There's a few ladies who age gracefully. Julia Roberts is aging gracefully. Yeah, I haven't seen her in a minute. Meryl Streep, she aged gracefully. Helen Mirren. But then you look over at Chris Kardashian or what we call her. No. Yeah. Chris Kardashian. They're getting like, well, apparently there's a new surgery that fixes your shitty surgery in Hollywood. So she looks good again. That's what they did to her? The new surgery? She looks like good, right? Yes. Chris Jenner. Yes. And that's a big change. And everybody's freaking out.

1:02:19Oh my God, she got a new head. And all these other ladies want a new head too. Yeah, of course. Have you seen the difference? I haven't seen this one but I know the daughters like if you watch like no no no no no no no no no no no no no No, no, this one's crazy. This is the craziest new head. She looks like a sister Kelly Osbourne Kelly Osbourne has a new head Osbourne is a new human being cuz I just saw an interview with her after her dad died Yeah, she's like literally just like a hot chick now. She was a frumpy square-bodied British She looked like you I thought she was cute But that's a little cuter than you but I thought I could get her But yeah, she looks like a totally new human being yeah completely new um What we what were you looking up Kris Jenner Kris Jenner?

1:03:03She's I want to know how old she is as well So when you look at those kind of results you like okay now I get it I get it because before I was like you guys have to perfect this before you you turn everybody into a lizard Yeah, it's you're doing a weird thing. So like look this what she looks like now. It looks great What are you talking about this can't be real? I have no first of all I want to know who took this picture and where did you get your camera? What filters are you using is that a filterless photo because that's insane? Yeah, she looks great. She looks insanely good. How old is she?

1:03:42A thousand years old. 69? Toy. See, like, that's incredible. Whatever that doctor did. Yeah, if you're that rich, you know, what's that weird thing? The average person can't afford this type of surgery. Listen, Captain Blue Collar, settle down. Now they're doing the thing. Settle the fuck down. We're working with science here, not equity. How about the chicks taking the pads out of their cheeks? Oh, Jesus don't do that ladies. Their faces suck in. Yeah. Crazy looking. What is it called? Crazy idea. Buckle fat. What is it called? Buckle, yeah. It's just, it sounds like something so scary to do.

1:04:19God damn it. Yeah. It takes fucking shit out of your face. See, like, but most plastic surgery I say, oh, that doesn't look better. But with Kris Jenner, that looks better. I think this is a specific thing that's happened. There's some new surgery that's doing, it's like correcting shitty surgery. and a few people you can see are weirdly looking better now. Maybe Nicole Kidman got fixed up a little bit. Yeah, bro. Who knows what they're doing? Dude, I'm going to get fucking fake abs. You see those, the ab implants? I've always said it. I crowdsource it. My audience will pay for it. I'll get a fat ass.

1:04:49Most of what they're doing is they're sucking out the fat in between the ab muscles to make them look like it's sculpted. Oh, really? It's lipo around the ab? I think they do actual implants. No, what it really actually is is fat rolls. They just fucking... Right? Sort of, right? No, no. Some people can get implants. Like there's that one guy that did his whole body like a Ken doll. Do you know about that guy? Oh, he's had like a ton of implants all over his shoulders and his arm. He looks crazy. Legitimately crazy. I think maybe some people are doing with their abs. What a lot of people are doing is just a liposuction sculpture.

1:05:23Yeah. Etching. That's what they call it. It's so funny. There's like, oh, you get all these things now for like, because women have had like Spanx forever and like just body shaping like things to wear under their clothes. And they'll advertise them for dudes. I don't know if I could wear Spanx to suck in my body. I cannot possibly dream of a situation taking my clothes off in front of a woman and her having to watch me spill out of a shirt. With every inch I take off, things just start expanding. Does it have my vacuum sealed? I have really bad posture, right? And there's a few things that I've gotten to help with my posture.

1:05:57One of them is a thing that you stick to your back, and if you lean down a little bit, it buzzes. and you correct yourself. Like it vibrates. Like a dog? Yeah, like a dog. But another one that I had was a harness. A harness and essentially - Oh my God, it's all like a dog stuff. I go up to a run around back and then I can zoom all around with no fear of getting hit by a car. He's got a fucking collar that doesn't let him leave his yard. Zap! Every time I slouch, I get shocked. No, there's a harness that you wear and it pulls your shoulders back like this, right? I've seen that, yeah. Yeah, yeah.

1:06:30But I got that and I was like, this one is actually pretty good because it corrects your posture naturally. And I remember I went on a date with a girl and I hugged her and she goes, are you wearing a bra?

1:06:41And I was like, oh, I'd rather have shitty posture than be accused of wearing a bra by a woman. Oh, that's hilarious. Are you wearing a harness? Are you wearing a bra? Did you break off of a school trip where you were connected to other kids? Oh, my God. Yeah. Just guys. There's nothing. It's like being bald and wearing a hat. Like girls don't they'd rather you just be bald women don't want an unconfident man Like I don't men don't really give a shit about women's confidence as much. I guess there's a hat Reek of lack of confidence if you're a ball guy all the time Yeah, but a heck is a look I think almost yeah, but the hat also A hat will cover up your baldness I used to wear a hat in the beginning because I was going bald when I was like 19 I was gonna say wearing a hat because you're going bald, like starting to see the pattern of...

1:07:29But if you shave your head down, a hat's just like a look out of it. Right, right. If you shave your head down. If you already have a shaved head. But wearing it to hide like receding damage. Yeah, when I was like 19, I started going bald and I would wear a hat all the time. All the time, before I started shaving my head down. I've seen that before. Somebody who wears a hat is like their look and then one day they take it off and they look like fucking riffraff from Rocky Horror. Apparently there's a new drug. Where's the drug developed? Was it... Was it Taiwan? There's some country developed a drug that's regrowing hair.

1:08:01Like, they put it on bald mice and they demonstrated it. You could put it on like a square area. Let's do it, Joe. The mice's body. I think I like being bald. Oh, here we go. The lies start. Even if it grew back, I'd keep it super short. I'd just keep it stubble. Let's see. 20 days it grows it back? 20 days. Raising questions about what finding means for the treatment of human baldness. But if I had a fucked up looking head like if I had a flat head definitely want some hair back there Like you back that article for a second There's a certain look that doesn't work with a seen that crazy look they grew like a square What part do you want to see?

1:08:44So I was a doctor that's what it was This guy may have figured out how to regrow hair in people's life and And still, as Americans, we can't just, we're not going to learn Dr. Sung-Yong. We have to call him Jerry. We call him Jerry because it's American. Sung-Yong? What? Oh, Jerry. Jerry. Yeah, he solved baldness. Learn his name. Yeah, that is funny. Yeah, I would, I just look better bald. When I had hair, it was like kind of nappy and kinky and fucking, yeah, it wasn't good. You'd like to try again, though. I mean For the for the just for the story and the hilarity of growing my hair back. That's fucking Look how hilariously handsome I look No, look at the bit guys Oh my god guys I put keratin in it.

1:09:36Isn't that funny? It shimmers in the light get a mohawk Spike it up with wax. I try to do a mohawk It's fun to have options. In the sixth grade, I tried to do a mohawk. I did two gay haircuts in the sixth grade. My mom was in hairdressing school, so she didn't know how to cut hair yet. She was just practicing on me. And the one was a mohawk that went, it was just not straight, went down the side of my head like this. And then the other one was, remember Tong Po, how he had the braid in the back of his head? Yuri Prohaska had that for a while. Yeah, he did. Yeah, Yuri had that. So I saw that. I was like, dude, that's really cool.

1:10:09I was like, what I want to do, though, because my hair was long, I was like, I want to have the braid in the front. Like that. Like long. That was the idea. And in my mind, though, eventually I would grow it long enough that I would attach a sword. A blade to it. Yeah. And I'd be able to try it. Oh, no, no, no. Like a weapon would be my head. I'm Louis J. Gomes. The J is for flying guillotine. And I remember I had my mom shave my head down except for this one spot. And then my hair, it wasn't really long enough to braid. And it was very poofy. So my hair was just a poof ball right on the front of my head like this.

1:10:42Because you were going to grow your tongue poofy. I was gonna grow my Tong Po thing, and I showed up in the sixth grade, and this kid, Paul Tomonti, was like, bro, your hair is gay. And then I - You're not gonna be a part of the Lu Tang clan. I just started punching him. Because there was nothing else I could do, because I knew he was 100 % right. Nice loofah head, dickface. How much time did you give yourself to grow something long enough where you could actually use it as a weapon, rather than just scrape across your forehead? Because it's gotta grow. If you're gonna really make, and you're gonna put a blade on the end of it.

1:11:12I was in the sixth grade. In my mind, by the time I got to the tenth grade, it would be perfect blade height. Wow, dude. That's patience. Were you going to train with it, or were you just going to hope that when time comes, you know how to cut people with it? You don't need to train for something like that, dude. I say just hook it up and let it fly. It's in your jeans, bro. I used to doodle characters, and I used to doodle myself as this Asian superhero with fucking a blade braid. You think Ghostface Killer took lessons? No, dude. He just lived it. Those kung fu movies, when I was a kid, like we used to go to Chinatown and watch kung fu movies.

1:11:46There was kung fu theaters where you could go watch them. And it was like those kind of movies are the most unrealistic fight movies in the history of fight movies. Dancing. Like weird how they decided that that was going to be like a fight in a movie. Which doesn't look like any kind of fight in any real situation. Like a mosh pit at a Pantera show. That's what a fight looks like. But was like, Bruce Lee was applicable. Yeah, but Bruce Lee was very different than those Chinese Kung Fu movies. Bruce Lee was just a martial artist fucking people up. Those Chinese Kung Fu movies, it was like, ha, ha, ha, he, ha.

1:12:23It was like - Well, it's just starting in positions. Yes. Why would you even start like that? You would convince yourself that you could beat up five guys at once. You'd be like, all right, I got it. I just have to make sure that I have - Oh, your stance was everything, dude. When Tekken came out, you were like, oh, if I ever get on Street Fighter now, I'm going full Eddie Gordo. I don't have any kind of flying kicks or anything, but I'm definitely do a lot of hands down by my side dancing Yeah, but I don't know why but there's like a weird tongue-in-cheek aspect to Chinese kung fu movies like they're kind of serious But kind of not because everybody knows it wouldn't really work like that You know, they're the only ones that had that like all other fuck you never see like a Western with like a kind of a corny choreographed fight scene between guys in a bar They didn't get fighting movies India does it a lot.

1:13:06Until recently, they didn't really nail fighting in movies. Right? Because, like, boxing movies, even to this day, it really doesn't look real. I tell you who did it well is Daniel Day-Lewis in that movie The Fighter. He did it well. He did it well. And he actually trained as a boxer for a full year before the film. Like, obsessed. The fight? Not the fighter. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's about the IRA guy that was in jail, that gets out of jail. What is it called? Is that what it's called, Jamie? The Fighter is, I think, that's the Mickey Ward one. Okay, which one is the the boxer? Is that what it's called?

1:13:38What's the Daniel Day-Lewis movie? Lincoln Lincoln it was Lincoln you're thinking of born before the dog my left foot Yeah It is the boxer. Okay, so in the boxer he plays his IRA guy, but was an IRA guy right either way Looks very realistic looks looks realistic like the movement is real. The hand speed is real It's like they're really hitting each other. It looks like a guy who's actually boxing versus a choreographed bunch of movements. You know, like a guy. It looks like legitimate. This episode is brought to you by Gold Belly. This is insane. There's a site called Gold Belly, and they ship legendary food from America's best restaurants straight to your house.

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1:15:52Use promo code SWITCH26 and save beyond the season. It's a deal so good, you're going to want to tell your people. Switch now at visible.com slash rogan. Terms apply. Limited time offers subject to change. See visible.com for planned features and network management details. That's why I lost so much. Yeah, this is him in here. I modeled my game after Clubber Lang. Look how he throws punches, Matt. I mean, you would think that this dude actually knows how to box. I mean, this looks like an actual boxing match. Yeah, it looks good. It looks good, man. You can tell when a guy's throwing punches at full speed with a guy's technique.

1:16:34And he looks sharp, man. Sylvester Stallone did train boxing, though, for Rocky, right? Yes. Look, Sylvester Stallone knows how to box, sure. But this is different. The movie, though, is not good boxing. This is much more like an actual boxer moves. What Sylvester Stallone did was make it very exciting, right? And so it didn't have to be as realistic as it had to be just spectacular footage to make Rocky win and all that good stuff. And it was fun. This is different. Because this looks like an actual fight would look. Yeah, they did it good in, what's the MMA movie? The favorite movie of the year.

1:17:08Warrior. Roadhouse starring Conor McGregor. You love that. That's movie fighting. The first one was awesome. It's first row I didn't see the second Roadhouse. I haven't seen the Conor McGregor one yet I haven't seen it. Oh, no. He just showed up as Conor McGregor on coke every day. Can I explain something? Let me tell you the problem with this you know the first film well, I guess yes. Oh, yeah me too very well takes place inst It takes place in Missouri where I believe this could happen a weird old man can take over the town with a monster truck and and serve up his own brand of justice until you get Patrick Swayze to come to town and be the bouncer for the whole neighborhood.

1:17:49I bought that. Do you know the bad guy in this movie was like a mafia guy, basically, shaking everybody down for money. Right. Do you watch the new one? Yeah, yeah. The problem, do you remember, of the new one, it takes place in Key West, Florida, and the big bad man is offering this lady triple market value to buy her shanty shithole bar because they're building a resort and will offer her the property a mile down the road. That's who the bad guys are. That's what you're supposed to get behind him wanting to stop real estate developers. That's it? Legitimate real estate developers. Wait a minute.

1:18:26That sounds like a good deal. And then quietly on the back and they go, oh, they're also bringing in drugs. That has nothing to do with the real bar bouncer issue that Roadhouse is supposed to be about. Yeah. It was so stupid. It was bad. and then Conor McGregor. How weird. I wonder why they made that choice. I don't know. Well, there was going to be Ronda Rousey at first. Remember that? That was a long time ago, right? That was crazy. I think that was... If I showed up and there was a female bouncer at a place, I would start a fight just to see what would happen. This is the fight scene? Oh, what are you going to do?

1:18:57Kick me out, princess? What are you going to do? Hey, how about when you choke me out? Then you got to get my fucking body out of here. Then what? Princess? You called her princess? Ronda Rousey breaks your shoulder. the problem with me watching Jake Gyllenhaal and Conor McGregor in a fight scene is that's still, it's Conor McGregor you want me to suspend so much disbelief you want me to think that Jake Gyllenhaal is going to fuck up Conor McGregor I believe that Conor McGregor would lose to Patrick Swayze Dalton pain don't hurt he would have seen him coming a mile away left boot oh man that movie was fun it was a fun movie because it's so kooky It's so like he is now he is now culpable of two three finger throat rip deaths Twice he's done that now The improbable the improbable choice how he gets them to leave that neck so exposed And then he snatches it And by the way talked himself out of killing yet a third at the end of the film That was the funniest thing to have a guy pinned down on a couch And you're on top of him you'd assume the move is going to be the fist up in the air He three fingers him up in the air.

1:20:09He's threatening him with the claw. Doesn't do it, though. Also, the other suspension of disbelief, if you recall, is that the hardest fight he has is against the old man at the end. The old man gives him a good run. Ben Gazzara. It's so funny because it's rare in street fights that you see people throw kicks. But when you see somebody throw an actual spinning kick in a street fight, it's the coolest thing ever. The kick to take away the gun. And now she's like you're an animal dude. I Feel like the kick into the water was unnecessary you already have his throat now you gotta kick him in the water He's like I'm so I know I said I would never use I would never use the garden hoe again

1:20:52The Eagle Claw, I mean that is a crazy Who wrote that into the script? It's his move It would be like for somebody who like knows how to like you really know how to fight You could actually murder somebody with your bare hands, but I think about for somebody who doesn't have to fight like me or Jay, how long it would take me to murder Big Jay with my bare hands. Just a lot of things like why you're trying to choke me. I'd be like, eventually just being able to be like... I'm tired. I'm covered in blood. Sweat. He won't fucking die. When I was a kid, I used to teach this guy who was a mob guy in Whitey Bulger's organized crime organization.

1:21:31He wound up going to jail for murder. And he was a guy used to he was like a fucking hitman and he would train at the same taekwondo school as me And I was I was teaching that guy private lessons and he was like don't feel bad He wasn't killing him with taekwondo. Oh, he definitely wasn't but he wanted to be able to he wanted to be able to He was tired of guns. He goes if you were gonna kill somebody by hitting him. Where would you hit him? I was like I guess in the neck. He's like, yeah I was like, okay I was like 16 Am I an accessory? Bro I was like 16 years old I was like okay Is that where you would hit it to this day?

1:22:06Do you agree with 16 year old Joe Rogan? Is that where you hit them? No I don't know why I told them the neck Probably because I didn't have a good answer I would say stomp their I would say you knocked them unconscious And then stomp them to death Their head Yeah Yeah If you wanted to kill somebody with your bare hands and feet That's the best way Choke them until Choke them unconscious And then keep choking And then keep choking them I aim for the mythological spot under the armpit That shuts you off like a light switch. The chakra. Yeah. Yeah. Soul sucker, I call it. You know, it's just... Any kind of, like, physical conflict is a weird thing.

1:22:42But I think the biggest problem with physical conflict is, like, most people have never done it. And they're scared of it. And then they puff their chest out. And they act ridiculous. I've done it a lot. And I'm scared of it. I've never done it, like, trained or well. I mean, it's like street stuff. And I'm still terrified of it. So many guys talk themselves into a fucking terrible beating for no reason. It's just because they think they're in a movie or something. They think they have to say something back. Well, I mean, the street out here keeps Worldstar Hip-Hop alive. Sixth Street. I mean, it is...

1:23:13I'll tell you what, I feel like it's a lucky thing down here that, like, thank God it's a lot of people who don't know how to fight. Those fights really don't go, like... People get knocked down and shit all the time, but they're wild swings. That's the thing, most people don't know how to fight, so that's sort of like the great equalizer. If everyone knew how to fight nobody would be fighting. Well, I think it's the people that can don't find themselves getting in a situation or avoid those situations They're more respectful because they don't need to prove anything What's also to learn how to do that you've got to get your ass kicked a lot for many years You start to understand exactly how little you know how to fight in the beginning It's like open mic and comedy you're like oh I suck so there's no ego once you actually like go and train but yeah, I mean the amount of people that like that know how to fight just typically there's just nothing to prove like when i was before i ever trained anything at all it was like in my mind i was like i had to be tough and i had to like go prove that i was the toughest guy like if i was in a bar i'd be like dude i could beat up anybody in this bar i couldn't beat up anybody i was a fat fucking just a goth kid but like but you also had to walk the new york streets by you you kind of have to fill yourself with some kind of like, I'm not the guy.

1:24:20I'm not the guy that you go for. Or that you walk around looking terrified. Well, you're a big dude. That helps. Yeah, I'm a big Latino guy. And I think that like... You can scare people off just for a little attitude. Yeah. Good defense mechanism. You put that knife in your hair. It's like a Labrador retriever that barks at you. Like, bitch, you ain't gonna bite me. I know what you are. I mean, if he had a braid blade, he would fucking... Oh, my God. He'd stab yourself right in the neck. It would whip around your head and stab you right in the neck. It could be your first time doing it. And then your back?

1:24:50No practice. Out of your neck. Get your back. Get it out. I need your help. I need your help now. Hey, you tried to get the guy you were trying to kill. I'm so sorry. You're right. I was being a dick. You were once foe. Get the knife out of my back. You were once foe. I now consider you friends. My braid blade is stuck in my back. My braid blade. Oh, my God. Is it bad? My braid blade. Is it bad? Is it bad? Oh, my God. My braid blade is so stupid. Yeah, that's so stupid. Yeah. Oh, God. Is it bad? That's why kids can't vote, right? That's why you don't let an eight-year-old vote. Because he wants a braid blade.

1:25:31You have a preposterous plan, young man. Your plan is preposterous. I don't think they should let an 18-year-old vote. I think you should have to be 45 and own property to vote. I have old slave rules in my mind. Tell me this. What the fuck is going on in New York? Are you guys about to really elect a communist? Is that really what's happening which one's that so ran That guy's a good rapper have you ever seen his rap work? No, but he does do rap music. I heard did a lot of different things. He had a bunch of various accents Have you heard his rap music? He's gonna win Yeah, crazy. We live in New Jersey dude Stavros is helping him.

1:26:08Hey, but here's the thing man like Every time something new happens whether it's some new person that comes in that bucks the system anytime that's good the system needs to get tested if you're mad because a communist won or is going to win as the mayor of new york city well clearly you didn't do your job opposing side because like you don't have the right guy nobody's interested in what you have to say you they don't feel like you're representing the people someone's no good they pushed him out they pushed cuomo out and this guy won the democratic primary is that what uh Corinne was running for?

1:26:47Mayor, yeah. They pushed him out as a governor, right? And so after they pushed him out as a governor, Hochul takes off and now he's running for mayor. And when he's running for mayor, he lost in the primary to Mom Donnie. But then he kept running, I guess as an independent. Is he as an independent now? If you say on the microphone, Joe, vote Corinne Fisher, we will know the mayor of New York. Corinne Fisher, the comedian? Yeah, she pulled out of the race. Oh, she did? But she was running for mayor of New York. Oh, that's right. That was a while back. We spent months making fun of it. It ruled.

1:27:17It's who would want that job good lord who would want to be bill de Blasio's next guy You know like are you fucking kidding me? Yeah, it seems like that job everyone half the city's gonna fucking hate you It's a living greasy man no matter what you gotta hope something Terroristic happens that brings its place You know what's funny cuz I I moved up to New York right after 9-11 cuz it was taking too long to drive there because the way they shut down the tunnels. So that's the time that I fucking moved. And it really was like a fucking, not like a scary place at the time, but it definitely like Giuliani was divisive to people.

1:27:58And then it was just, this guy's the best. He's on Saturday Night Live and he's cutting ribbons. It just became immediate love for him. And that sort of happened immediately. Didn't it get like George W. Bush like a month? The whole country was like, yeah, dude, let's go get him. Yeah. Yeah, it really did bring everyone together like everyone loved cuz then it's like Giuliani went away from New York and then the next thing You know, it's like I don't pay attention to politics stuff It's like Giuliani that clown piece of shit that everybody hates and look at his shit running down his face And he's an asshole.

1:28:26I'm like well, I thought we loved him because he didn't like clean up New York City up prostitution and drugs were all out of Times Square and he did a fantastic job when he was the mayor if you look at it that way But the thing is he supported Trump and so everybody was like fuck him. That's a loser You just forget what he did during 9-11. Yeah. People are so nice. Now it's like, keep letting 9-11 happen. But a lot of people will also be like, New York lost its soul after Giuliani. Even before Trump, a lot of people were hating on Giuliani because there was a romanticism about New York being kind of dangerous.

1:28:59There's something to be said for that, but that's also like, hey, guess what? There's plenty of soul still in Brooklyn and the Bronx. Things move on. The number one thing that you want to keep open forever and ever is peep shows. Like hey, maybe you got bad priorities You lived through it, right? You saw the peep show, you walked by the adult bookstore Okay, it's over Now that's going to be at Papa John's Right when I moved to New York City, it was days before 9-11 A week before 9-11, I started going to school in New York City And I used to get off the bus at Port Authority And there was all of those It wasn't even like peep shows It was just essentially porn in a booth You'd go in a booth, you'd put in a dollar Oh, the buttons like five buttons?

1:29:35Yeah, just sticky buttons I used to go in and I used to just jerk off. That's crazy. No, all the time, dude. I know a lot of people do this. You put a dollar in and then you'd get like three minutes and you'd have to click through. And just like you're clicking through porn now, you'd have to find the porn you wanted to finish to, put another dollar. Did you lean your back against the wall? I sat down one time and I remember the seat was wet. Oh, you sat. The seat was wet one time and I sat on it. And I convinced myself that my asshole sucked AIDS into my body. Yeah. Well, yes. Well. Stop wondering where you got it from.

1:30:09That's the answer. I had a friend of mine who used to be a crack addict, and he used to go to those places, and he would smoke crack and just jack off in the mall. He said he'd be in there for hours. And I was like, what the fuck? What is this crack? That is a crack that makes you so awesome. Dude, bro. When I smoke crack, I can't get hard at all. There's two people that talked about it where it makes you try it, makes you want to try it. One of them is Hunter Biden. He talked about it on that. I'm sorry. What was that show again? It was Channel 5, Andrew Callahan. Andrew Callahan, Channel 5. He did an interview with Biden.

1:30:42And Biden gives like a soliloquy about the virtues of crack. Like how much he loved crack. And like what the crack experience is like. It's so good. Like he's talking about it. He's so articulate. It makes you want to try crack. And then Charlie Sheen told me the first time he tried smoking crack at all. This was in his documentary too, I think. Either way, a girl was giving. Yeah, it was. A girl was giving him a blow job while he took his very first hit of crack. And he said, to this day, nothing's ever topped it. Yeah. I've always heard it's the exhale of crack is amazing. The exhale. And then you go, we got to get crack.

1:31:23We have to find more crack immediately. Guys, you want to just do crack? Yeah. It's crazy because - It's one that I said I would try probably. What'd you say? It's one that I said I probably would try. You would try crack? Yeah. That's insane. Probably. I mean, I'm not going to, but the things you were like, would you try this? Would you try that? I would try crack before I took LSD. That's insane. It's quicker. That's actually insane. It's quicker. LSD is an experience. Right. That's hilarious. Yeah. What if you knew it's real, pure LSD? Like if you got it from a scientist. We dosed Jay with LSD.

1:31:59The only time he was done LSD was, do you know about this? No. Terrible friends? So we had one hit of acid in his beer. So here's what happened. You didn't let him know at all? Well, it wasn't my fault. Okay, hang on. Don't be so accusatory, Joe. You didn't watch the Trial of the Century, obviously. I'm just asking. You brought this up, Louis. It's going to make you look bad. No, it's not going to make you look bad. This is not Rogan's fear behavior. I will tell you what happened, okay? So we were having an election for the president of the Legion of Skanks. I hate to treat people in the sphere, dude.

1:32:30And Ari Shafir was running against me, Jay, and Dave Smith. to be the president of our podcast. And obviously he won. But he had Shane Gillis as his running mate. This is before Shane blew up. But Shane's always been fucking brilliant. So we were doing these every week. It was during the pandemic. We're one of the only live experiences. Like all the comedy clubs were closed down. We did our show outside. So people were coming out every week. They were super, super invested. And we had all these special guests on. And every week it was just getting better and better. And it was the last episode.

1:32:57We were about to decide who the president was. We were deciding that day. and uh i ari had just dosed bert like maybe a year before on his podcast before was our several years so then i got a hit of acid from a kid in the audience and i was like i'm gonna dose all just some guy just some dude he said it was a really good acid so then i said i put into ari's beer right and then i i was like ari's gonna win whatever let's be hilarious we're gonna dose ari on the podcast so i told shane i was like dude this hilarious we're gonna dose ari shane tells Ari. And then on the podcast, we went back and watched this because it's on camera.

1:33:32On the podcast when Jay's not looking, Jay's just pontificating or being funny or whatever, Ari switches beers with Big Jay and gives it to Jay. And then Jay starts drinking or whatever. Now Ari for the next hour starts pretending to trip. And he's like doing all this. He's being all weird. Me and my buddy are cackling, laughing at him. Let me give you my perspective of where we're at here in this part of the story. I am not looking at Ari. What I'm noticing is everybody else at the table is like talking amongst themselves. David Tell was there too. Yeah, he was. Talking amongst themselves while I'm saying something.

1:34:08And I'm like, I'm losing the people I'm doing a show with. So I'm like, blah, and I start trailing off and I go, I'm like, guys, what's, you know, almost like off microphone. I'm like, what's going on? Why is it? And Lewis leans over to me and goes, I dosed Ari's beer with acid and I went, come on, man. I was like, I don't want to do this stuff. I don't want to get involved in dosing. To be fair to Jay, his reaction was like, that's not a good idea at all. He was not on board with it. Never. I said, let's not get involved in the dosing game. Dave Smith also said the same thing. But damage was done and I go, all right, well, if you're going to do it to somebody, dare I say, Ari's the person who deserves that to happen to him the most.

1:34:50so I'm like alright well it's Ari at least and then they go so what we're laughing at is look at Ari so I finally go over at Ari and he is like you know like licking the microphone and like doing all that stuff and then they pull a big reveal I was like I dosed you Ari so I don't care if you win and then he's like doing this then he goes he was like oh really no no he goes oh dude really did you you dosed me at all that dude that's so not cool he goes you did that or did I I switched my beer with Jay's. It's just completely straight. And then you see me literally on camera go, nah, nah, how did I get involved in this at all?

1:35:30And then they played the replay. You see Shane looks at the camera and says, I'm sorry, because he feels terrible that he didn't stop him. And then Jay, he had never taken acid, so Jay stayed up for 72 hours? 26, 26 straight hours. 26 straight hours. All I was doing was, and they go, well, did you have fun at least? Did you watch something? Did the walls melt? did like, yeah, have some kind of revelation. I go, I sat on my couch for 26 hours. I went outside a few times and sat there thinking, why would my friends have done this to me? That was my consuming thought. Why would my friends do this to me?

1:36:01I wouldn't do this to them. Why would they do it to me? You just caught a stray. Yeah. Caught a stray in a righteous war. Like Ari deserved to get dosed at least once. Sure. And somehow he avoided it. Did you ever see the one where Ari was on, And what pod was he on Brian Redband's podcast? I think it was Sam Tripoli's. Sam Tripoli's podcast. So it was like quite a while back, like 2010 or something like that. And they smoked salvia on the podcast. And Ari said that he lived a whole nother life under the water for like six months. Like he had friends. He had a girlfriend. He had a job. And then he lived a whole life.

1:36:43In 30 seconds. And then he came back. It was just a few minutes. He was yeah, but whatever it was like that stuff was weird cuz you could just buy it at a head shop Yeah, and it was like one of the most potent psychedelics you could ever take Yeah, it was just unregulated for like a year. So everyone was buying salvia My bath salts the guy ate a guy's face. I smoked salvia But that guy probably had problems already my buddy Forrest brought home salvia from college didn't tell me what it was We were just driving in my car with a bong. That's where I was at in my life. I had a bong in the car I got a car, but we gotta bring it from I'm driving, he's like, dude, here, hit this And I grab the bong, and I'm driving Literally, and I go Oh no And then he goes, put that down, because it was a cop across street And then the word down It like elongated and went like Go You saw the word?

1:37:29The word down, giant block letters, crashed in front of the car Like it was like stone letters The word down, and I was like And I pulled over to the side of the road And he was just laughing in my face And I was like what the fuck was that? A minute 30 seconds like it was just so quick, but it was like super intense. Yeah you don't do it while you're driving. I don't know who didn't teach you that. Well there was that video of the person jumping out of the window right? That was like the famous like viral one where someone smokes out right away they just go and just like go out of their fucking window behind the couch.

1:37:58Oh dude. I can't do hallucinogens at all. But that's almost why I'm saying like crack. Like I would try that over L. Again, I've only been dosed with LSD. It was 26 hours of just being bummed out. Cracks way quicker. As I said to me it's almost like I try things that are like this will be done Quick ketamine that was the crazy thing about the hunter Biden interview is that he was saying that it's it's probably safer for you than alcohol He's pretty smart. That's what's uncomfortable. He's clean now. He's saying that yeah, it probably is you know Allegedly, I mean, you know, I always believe that's always a big thing when someone gets off drugs but they don't talk about it with like Just the I'm told to call it evil and say it was evil and have some like fun reflection on it I think they're more prepared to stop for real.

1:38:39Yeah, that's true. Right. Because they're being honest about being honest. They're like, yeah, dude, they're like, you know, first couple months. I may be never laughed harder than my life, you know, have enjoyed it. And then it's like, but then I just, you know, my money's gone. My family's like a Colombian president or one of these press. It was some some country like the president was like, no, cocaine safer than alcohol. And he was like straight up. And then like they did like a review on it. It technically is I think the real problem is the fentanyl stuff the laced cocaine You know the stuff that's laced with stuff other than pure cocaine, but that's the problem with an Unregulated black market if they made it legal in America and pharmaceutical drug company sold cocaine You'd get like the best cocaine you'd get pure cocaine It's recreational from a pharmacy.

1:39:20I don't even think we're going to Gonzales a Gonzales pharmacy I don't even know if you can grow it in America Are there places in America that are capable of growing coca leaves? I think you need slaves. Yeah. Did you ever see that thing? There's a show called Trafficked with Mariana Van Zeller. There's this lady. She's an investigative journalist. And she does wild stories. Like she went to the people in Colombia that are making the cocaine. And she interviewed all of them. They all wore masks and shit. And then she went with them out into the woods when they walked through the jungle to bring the cocaine to the dealers And she was there with them for the whole process documenting it What the fuck man like they're just using Gasoline just pouring gasoline on these coca leaves and they're making this it's like this is completely Unregulated this all could be done in a pharmaceutical drug studio where they have like Laboratories and everybody's wearing hazmat suits and shit and they make perfect cocaine This cocaine sounds awesome, Joe.

1:40:22Perfect cocaine. It does sound like a long way to go for you guys to be able to dance like black people aren't watching. In the U.S., there is no widespread reports of commercial coca cultivation, but the plant thrives best in conditions similar to those found in the Andean regions of South America, generally between 1 ,650 to 6 ,000 feet elevation with warm temperatures and abundant rainfall. Yeah, see, it's not a good plant for America. It's a South American plant. Yeah. We can grow weed here really well. We figured that out. Yeah, but you know I remember the first time it was legal if it was legal you'd get pure cocaine That's what they're having there They're they're fucking America sucks.

1:41:00It probably will be legal one day. It should be legal Like if you can't prove this what it should be we could prove it's killing more people than are having fun with it Let's make it illegal if you can't do that Why is it illegal because you well because you shouldn't take it Okay, then don't take it But what if you want to take it what if you could just take it once and you're fine and then you still, are we allowed to have some fucking freedom or not? Or are we going to be nannied? I would say there would be a couple years of people being, because you look at weed, widespread legality of it now, right?

1:41:28Everyone's getting very high. The weed's gotten so strong, it's like... Well, there's that. The strength of it would be a concern, but I think there's also something to... I don't know. I've gone back and forth in that. I think it's when my daughter was a teenager more, I was thinking, when they talk about that. Just legalize every drug, which I hear the argument for, too. That's why I said I really don't know where I fall, But like I also have a feeling like when I was younger I could have been got someone could have got me to try Heroin as a teenager by simply laying out like I mean it's legal dude, right?

1:41:57That never stopped me from doing drugs. It did way with me A lot of it was a fear of having anything on me I tell you I got cocaine one time to bring to a girl It was a bag this big and I mean I thought I was walking around like Marcellus Wallace's fucking soul I mean, I was like, oh my God, everyone's coming for this. Everyone knows they're going to get me. They're going to get it from me. Dude. Yeah. Now I, uh, yeah, I would just assume the Coke would be so good and it would just be like a couple of years of everyone just being like really fucked up. Like you can't, you can't go from it being like unregulated to just distributing it to everybody.

1:42:31Yeah, for sure. Yeah. It's going to, there's going to be a long period of adjustment, but at least you're cutting out organized crime. It's like, that's what they had to do with alcohol. So when alcohol prohibition was going on, how many years was alcohol prohibition? prohibition again? Put that into perplexity. Two years is my guess. Our sponsor perplexity. Four and a half years. It's probably better. We have an AI sponsor now that we ask questions to. How many years was... Is it a sexy woman? We don't make it talk. I don't want to pretend it's a person and fall in love with it. 13 years. 13 years of alcohol prohibition?

1:43:0413 years, daddy. 13 years. Baby, it was 13 years with no alcohol. So during that time that's the rise of organized crime. That's the rise of Al Capone like that's the rise of all these different mobsters That that's all you could tie that back to the roots of organized crime getting money from alcohol That's you know, that's where NASCAR came from It was like those guys are trying to get away from cops. So they made the best cars That's really what it was. Yes That's crazy. The roots of NASCAR is they've made those souped-up cars to get the fuck away from cops because they were running moonshine Yeah.

1:43:40Damn. And that they stopped that and then it came normal and now it's Bud Light. Now you can go and get, you know, a bottle of Makers. You can get it's in a store. It's like regulated. The legality never, like, because I've tried almost every drug, but the legality of it never really got me. But it's just the accessibility of it, right? Like, I might have, if weed was accessible as it is now, I might have tried weed way earlier than I did. I didn't start smoking weed until I was almost out of high school. But if it was just everywhere and it was great and you knew where everything came from, you had to, like, go on a journey to find weed.

1:44:11Even when we'd go on the road back in the day, we'd land in whatever new town. And I'd be like, Jay, I'll be back in an hour. I've got to go find weed. And I'd just ask every, like, skateboarder that I saw until somebody eventually. you look like a cop if you're a skateboarder and you came up to me I'd be like get the fuck out of here pig fuck you man it's so funny though potheads love getting each other high back in the day you'd literally just find somebody that looked like they liked weed especially if they're currently high then they're more likely to be pliable they'll go out of their whole way they'll go out of their entire way to just go and hook you up with their guy I'll bring you to my friend Scott's house next thing you know you're hanging with Scott listen to Slipknot.

1:44:52Telling them about your brain blade. The great mosh pit injury of 2011. I have the first EP. But yeah, if all drugs were accessible, I mean. Illegal, I think, would have drawn me to some things. I said inaccessible. But I'll tell you what's funny, too, that you don't really have much of it, but you definitely went through phases, I'm sure, in your life because you started smoking younger than I did even. But like as much as I smoke, I consistently have smoked weed since I started smoking, which was 20 some years ago. I made you a pothead. Yeah, without a doubt. But it is so funny though that I've still, to this day, don't have the, I'm faking it every time somebody comes to me and goes like, oh man, look at that right there.

1:45:32I always just go, okay. I don't mean it at all. When they start showing me purple things inside of it and stuff, I always go, no shit. I don't care about strains. They're like, dude, it's an indica dominant hybrid. It's 28%. I do care about that. I do care about it not just being a sativa because that'll just give me anxiety sometimes. But besides that, and by the way, if I'm with a bunch of people, and I don't ask what it is. If it's a sativa, we just smoke it. I don't overthink it. Ew, ew, asking what it is. That's crazy. You're all hanging out in a barbecue. Well, here's why, because it's not going to - Some guy's passing a joint.

1:46:04You're like, wait, what is this? To me, I say - Is this a sativa? Is this a hybrid? Smoking alone, a sativa, if I'm just in my hotel room or something, I might get a little panicky. It just still gets me anxious. And it's just like health anxious stuff. It's like I'm probably having a heart attack. It's not like the world's coming down on me. It's really like, why is my heart racing so fast? That's probably my body shutting off, huh? Now imagine you smoke crack. Then you'd feel real confident. It goes away. Crack is the opposite of weed. You'd be like, my fucking heart will never stop beating.

1:46:38It's fucking hard. He goes, I got to make sure my heart is still beating. I'm going to climb to the roof of this fucking place. Yeah.

1:46:46I don't think you should smoke crack, but I don't think people are going to stop smoking crack. Someone's making money off of it. So it's like, why should that money be made in an unregulated way where you don't know what you're getting? 100 ,000 people are dying every year because of that, right? 100 ,000 people are dying of opioid overdoses every year. And if that's the case, those 100 ,000 people—that's just in the United States. Those 100 ,000 people, like, how many of them wouldn't die if they weren't getting fentanyl-laced stuff? So is it worth 100 million or 100 ,000 people not dying to get them pure cocaine from a laboratory and sell it to them, rather than them get it from the cartel and maybe die?

1:47:28Is it legal anywhere, Coke? It is, right? There's a couple, like Portugal, I think all drugs are legal. Portugal, all drugs, I think it's called decriminalized. You're not supposed to sell them. There's a bunch of fucking junkies outside of a CVS, though, getting their fucking flu shots and picking up their cocaine. No, I don't think—the thing is, it's not junkie behavior. If you're forced to—like, if it's illegal, you're forced to do it in alleyways and shit. I think if it's— That's what the Democrats need to do. They need to push legalized drugs and then Medicaid-funded legalized drugs, and then people could just go to CVS and get coke.

1:47:57I would vote—if somebody said legalized drugs, we're going to lower taxes by 20%, I don't care about any of their other policies. They're getting my vote every time, period. Yeah, but legalized drugs is a good one just because you're not supposed to tell me what to do. Like it's not supposed to be one grown adult tells another grown adult what to consume or not to consume, especially when there's a lot of shit that shows it's not dangerous. So if you're doing that pot, Venezuela. So cocaine, Venezuela allows possession of up to two grams for personal use. Peru, Colombia, Bolivia, Ecuador, Paraguay, Mexico, and Poland permit legal or decriminalized possession for personal use.

1:48:36Oh, yeah. That's right. Mexico. Yeah. Mexico went crazy with all that stuff. Mexico, it's legal to possess for personal use cocaine. You can get a lot of stuff in Mexico. That's why they have those Ibogaine centers down there, too. People go to cure addiction. That's illegal in America. It's so fucking stupid. But they're starting to do that here. They're doing one in Texas because of former governor Rick Perry, because it helps a lot of soldiers a lot of cops with PTSD soldiers of PTSD like Ibogaine is like very helpful meanwhile most of that stuff is illegal in the United States for the most is federally illegal and like why like review that this is fucking stupid we're not babies and we're not getting any younger either like we should have figured this out in the 80s when I was in high school like why is this conversation still going on where you're letting grown adults tell other grown adults that they can't take things like bitch you don't even know what that thing is.

1:49:25You've never taken it. Do whatever you want to do with your body. Maybe this is what Zorhan Babadook is going to do in New York. What's his name? Remember the Zohan? He's going to bring a... It's going to be interesting. It's going to be interesting how much he changes once he gets into office. How much influence they can put on him. Goodbye Jew York. Am I right?

1:49:49But I feel like that's how the game is supposed to be played. Why is Stavros so stoked on him? I don't know. Stavros is having a good time. I don't know. He aligns with his political ideology. But I wonder if it's a specific thing. I just don't know any of his policies. I know he has a rap thing, and maybe prostitution is going to be legal. Yeah. I think they already did that. I think they already decriminalized it. Decriminalized prostitution? Did they decriminalize prostitution in New York? Take it from me. No, they haven't. I don't think so. There was talk about doing that, right? Well, maybe.

1:50:20I think it should be legal, too. New York? I'd say when they pop up with a a new like holy shit law they'll just drop it on you one morning I mean the smoking cigarettes um not smoking cigarettes I'm gonna say weed smoking weed wherever you like so legal that you can smoke anywhere you smoke cigarettes outside you can smoke weed in New York the day it went legal and it was like so unceremonious I remember like finding out like that day it's like weed's legal today like really it was such like a thing that was like debated for so long and then one day it just was Yeah, we used to be super illegal in New York City.

1:50:53There was all these fake dispensaries that popped up. It was like 100 of them because the cops didn't know what to do with them. Nope. So like 100 dispensaries opened up over the course of like a week. There was trucks with just Puerto Rican guys in the back of the truck. They were like, oh, welcome to the weed shop. And they were bringing in the best shit from California. So good. Yeah, yeah. And then one day, just the same way it was unceremoniously that it was legal, they said oh we're just fucking arresting everybody and then they shut down every dispensary in New York and they raided all of them they didn't do much arresting I don't think it was honestly but they went in because I'd go to the places and like it was like going to your favorite burger shop and finding out it just got robbed violently like you go in this place and they're just like picking up the pieces of things left behind they go they took everything man they just came in they took the whole ATM machine they took the whole fucking stash they had when was this?

1:51:47a couple years ago A couple years ago. Three years ago, maybe. Jesus Christ. And then fucking he went and Eric Adams burned it all. He burned it all off, all the stuff they just took from the stores. So he took all the weed and burned it? Eric Adams did? Yeah. Okay, so they decriminalized it for a short period of time and then decided to crack down on illegal dispensaries only? Yeah. They didn't decriminalize it. They legalized it. They legalized it. So they're just getting it from these illegal dispensaries that have a license, right? The problem was the idea. I think the way they got it to pass.

1:52:17He personally destroyed it? Yeah. Oh, you piece of shit. I think the way they got it to pass of doing, like, getting legalized, it was that it's going to bring revenue to New York. So it's like, we're going to use growers in New York. So it's like all these brands you never heard of before. Bro, why would he film himself running the tractor that's picking up the weed and dumping it onto the fire? Just marketing. He's an old school player. Just to get people talking about him. But that is such a bad idea. Like if you're willing to do that if you're a mayor and you think that's like when who's the guy that climbed in the tank?

1:52:49during the He was a running for president and it took they took a photo of him like a photo op but he was in a tank You know like a helmet on he looked like such a fucking dork that immediately crap Yes, Michael Dukakis. Look at this dork He's like this tiny little guy and he took this photo with him in a tank and everybody was like it's over Forget it, dude. How to destroy a presidential candidate. You can't come back from this. Yeah. Michael Dukakis, his eyebrows. That's what I remember. Yeah. Well, then his lady was like drinking. What was she drinking? She was drinking like either mouthwash or cologne or something like that, right?

1:53:27To get drunk? Yeah. Yeah. Trying to get drunk. Michael Dukakis' wife? Yeah. That's hilarious. It was a nail polish remover, wasn't it? Something crazy like that. I can't remember that story. Something crazy toxic. She was just trying to catch a buzz off of anything. What was he? He was going against George H.W. Bush, right? I believe so. She was drinking rubbing alcohol. Rubbing alcohol. Fucking yo. Imagine how that burns going down. Rubbing alcohol. Can rubbing alcohol actually get you drunk? Oh, yeah. Can it kill you? Will it kill you? That's where the poison and dose thing becomes a thing. Yeah, for sure.

1:54:00Wow. How about witch hazel? Let's see how much. You could drink rubbing alcohol for sure. Yeah. Yeah. That was the scandal of the time back then. Dukakis. Yeah. Why were we talking about him? Mayor Adams burning the weed. Oh, that's such a bad look, man. Yeah. Well, like, what is the angle? It's either your city and your state's made it legal, so it's like, what is the imagery of you burning it now? I'm telling you, because he's going, this is about New York. He's basically saying, like, these are businesses coming in and not bringing any revenue to, like, New York. This is what I would say. Okay.

1:54:33If I was the mayor and they had already done this, I would say, let's auction off these weed and give that money to the education system. Sure. Four tons of weed that you can sell now. Yeah. Okay. But then the problem is now, then the cops have an incentive to steal your weed and then resell it. And the cops become the biggest dealers in New York. If they could just steal your weed and resell it. If they made it legal. It's like Nino Brown. Yeah. Why were they able to steal that weed? If the weed is legal, what are we doing? It's because they're reselling it with no thing. It's like if you're trying to sell alcohol, though.

1:55:06If you were selling beers on a street corner. Taxes. Yeah. They got to get their cut. It's why you can't sell alcohol on a restaurant that doesn't have a license. Mayor Adams also today announced that as of yesterday, the task force has conducted inspections of 100 % of known shops identified as selling cannabis illegally, and that was part of Operation Padlock to protect Operation Padlock to protect's initial list of illegal shops. As a result of Operation's rapid success, the city has seized more than$63 million in illegal product, which has been taking up an outsized amount of space across NYPD's network of evidence warehouses.

1:55:44So many jeeters and stizzies. It sounds like you're stealing weed. It sounds like you're stealing weed. The two places that I would go that got shut down, the shop owners came out like, All the arms in the air like this is crazy. They just came in and destroyed everything. Here's my question, though. If it's legal, so it's legal. So if it is legal and you can sell it, why are you able to take – if you're going to a shop that's illegally selling televisions, okay, and you go in there and you go, oh, these guys have 60 televisions. You don't burn them, right? You don't take it from them and burn them.

1:56:19why are you allowed to take$63 million worth of marijuana product if it's legal, even if it's an illegal store, why are you allowed to take their product and just destroy it? That seems so stupid. It seems crazy. We know it's a commodity. Are you richy rich? Are you so rich that you're going to burn$63 million you're not worried about what goes to the city? Joe, I feel like you are. I feel like you could burn $63 million worth of weed and be like, it wasn't even that big of a deal. I'd feel it. The point is, why would you do that? Why would you do that? Why would you burn it? Why wouldn't you just give it away or sell it?

1:56:53Yeah, give it away to poor people can't afford weed That's what you should have done with the money. You should have bought it. I wish I could. Just sitting on a mountain of six of weed. And I just said I'm gonna give out all this weed to all the poor neighborhoods. All the people who can't support weed. Here's the answer in the last paragraph. Unregulated. Unregulated. Right, of course. And taxes on any of it. Of course. That's also consumable, right? So if somebody says - That was my point though. If you have unregulated televisions, they don't destroy the televisions. Yeah, they probably do.

1:57:18Oh, no. Do they really? Yeah, I actually bet they'd probably auction them off. They'd get mad. No, they wouldn't. They'd probably try to do something. And it's also, you're not consuming the TV, right? So it's not something you're putting in your body. So the regulation exists. Obviously, it's just for taxes and bullshit. Well, they always read the... I was going to say police auction for cars. They've seized cars. They definitely do that. They don't destroy cars. I know a buddy of mine who got... I like they don't even tell you. They're like, he's like, hey, I got a Mercedes. Like, yeah, well, you better hope the guy doesn't come looking for it.

1:57:41Yeah, that's exactly what I told my friend. He was buying a Porsche. like one of them old-school Porsches with a slant nose. I was like, dude, that's a drug dealer car. How many of them exist that even look like that thing? That guy's gonna find you one day. You're gonna be at a restaurant. He's gonna be out of jail. Like, hey! My first apartment. Hey, where'd you get that car? Huh? My first apartment in New York that I had, the landlord lived upstairs, him and his wife and kid, and he looked exactly like Travis Bickle. I mean exactly like the character Travis Bickle. and his name was Wayne, and he used to - Wait, who's Travis Bickle again?

1:58:17That's Robert De Niro's character in Taxi Driver. Oh, that's right, okay. He looked exactly like, he purposely chose to look like that character. Oh, boy. And the property had in front of the whole place a gigantic green padlocked gate, and inside there was two giant fucking pit bulls, these angry dogs that were just in a gate outside. And then the house you'd walk into, we were the front, first floor, They were second floor, but he was a repo man. And so when you come home, anytime, and like the reason we had to padlock the whole property was because up on the property in the front lawn, it would be like McLarens and fucking these beautiful.

1:58:53He was like just repoing like drug Dior cars constantly. There would be in our front yard. It's so terrifying. That's fucking terrifying. Scary as shit. Because if you come out, where's my fucking car? Like, I don't know. I don't have anything to do with it. By the way, we're in Queens. And we moved to Astoria because everyone was like, Astoria, Greek, it's so great. and the food and it's so not scary and a wonderful place. Well, the edge of it, where I moved, is on Queensbridge Projects where rap comes from. And that was scary as hell. So it was kind of like a rough area too. And they have these like, I mean,$200 ,000 cars on a front lawn.

1:59:32You don't want to buy a drug dealer's car. No. You don't want to live in his house after they repossess it. Like, no. No. Would you live in a murder house for a good deal, though? I almost bought a murder house. I know. I had put in an offer. It was accepted, and I pulled out at the last minute. You promised to keep it alive and murder your - It was a 300-year-old house. That was why I ended up not buying it. It was a judge who lived in it and put a guy in prison, and when the guy got out of prison, he murdered the judge and his wife in the house. And they didn't tell me when I first toured it, and then I did the research on it, and I thought it was cool.

2:00:04I didn't give a shit at all. I thought it was just a fun story. Having ghosts - What year? What year was this? Why does the one bathroom have blood coming out of the faucet? Is that what you said? 250 years ago? Okay, that doesn't count. Yeah. I'll live in that house. Yeah, but that's how ghosts... You want those ghosts. That's old ghosts. Old-timey ghosts with chains and like a fucking... Yeah, yeah, yeah. Woo. That's fine. I don't want them new ghosts. Contemporary ghosts? Drum dealer ghosts? The ones that throw you downstairs and kill you? Choke you with their pussies? I can live on the property of murder, but not in the structure.

2:00:38Oh, like if murder happened on a manor in the English countryside. No, just like it happened in a house, and then the house was like demolished. Okay. What if it happened in the woodshed, like Ed Gaines style? That's weird. Well, you know, in Long Island, somebody, they finally did, I think not long ago, like finally demolished the Amityville house. Oh, really? The Amityville Horror House. Like finally, just like someone bought the property and was like, take it down. What is the whole deal with the Amityville Horror? What was the true story about that? Monsters and Ghosts But I know the devil was in an amityville New York What was the story sometimes a man's gotta kill his family did a guy actually kill his family The the conjuring right though.

2:01:21They that was their story, right? Like they were the ones who discovered the Amityville Horror House the couple from the conjuring right? But what was the story about the Amityville heart did the father that went nuts killed his family with an axe Is that what it was think the real story? I believe so about the actual house itself I know that was the movie, but I never knew if that was the actual story itself It's good I think I mean, uh Because there's so many of those movies back in the 80s and shit like they would just make up a history And you would never be able to Google it Well, they say it's a true story like weapons the beginning weapons.

2:01:51They were like this is a true story It's like is it though? Yeah, that's what I was there a witch that came and possessed a bunch of children and they all Okay, here it is. He was American mass murderer who was tried and convicted in the 1974 killings of his father mother two brothers, and two sisters in Amityville, New York. His name is Ronald Joseph DeFeo, Jr. He was found guilty of six counts of second-degree murder and was sentenced to 25 to life. DeFeo died in March of 2021. The case inspired the book and film versions of the Amityville Horror. There it is. It's 112 Ocean Avenue. And so did he kill him with an axe?

2:02:29Shot him, I think. Shot him? Yeah. shot and killed six members of his family at their home.

2:03:05It is funny. The psychiatrist for the prosecution, Dr. Harold Zolon, maintained that although DeFeo was a user of heroin and LSD, he had antisocial personality disorder and was aware of his actions at the time of his crime. Interesting. Heroin and LSD. Unregulated. Yeah, unregulated. That's it. That's the problem. You got it from the cartel. So that was based on a true story. But, you know, all the demon shit in there. They just add that. It's kind of weird that you're allowed to do that after someone's dead. You just make up a bunch of stuff. Sensationalize it. Yeah. I mean, that's Ed Gein's show just did.

2:03:40Right. But this is like you're making up a thing where this guy is possessed by demons, which is why he's killing everybody. Oh, you give him like an out. Yeah. Yeah. Not only that, you turn it into a horror movie that has the supernatural in it. Ed Gein, that show was about what he really did. Like, he really did take people's skin off. The grave. The grave robbing and - Yeah. And stuff like that was definitely a real story. And he did make furniture out of people's skin. Like all that stuff was insane. Yeah, the shows took a lot of like liberties with like rumors and shit, but it was - Oh, like him wearing dresses and jacking off?

2:04:17No, like some of the murders, like he was never connected to all the murders that he did on the show. Like there was sort of like rumors, like none of it, like even where he killed his brother, I guess. He was mostly a grave robber was his thing. Yeah, he didn't, it was sort of like they kind of put two and two together and they just said he murdered his brother, but that was never proven. I see. Yeah. Yeah, I saw that part in the movie, and I was like, hmm. And I did look it up, and it did say that they weren't sure. They said he died of asphyxiation from the smoke. Yeah. But then they noticed that he had a bruise in the back of his head.

2:04:47He had a bruise, but they said when he fell, he could have hit his head. Yeah. Yeah. It could have. Who knows? But he definitely killed a few people, at least, right? I think he was only charged with two. Only two? Yeah. Yeah. Which, I mean, serial killer? Come on. Come on. The craziest one was Henry Lee Lucas. You ever see that movie, Henry Portrait of a Serial Killer? It's based on Henry Lee Lucas. Him and this dude, they traveled across the country together and he killed, like they don't even know how many people he killed. But then the problem with that guy is he also seems crazy. So then cops could bring him, what about this one, Illinois, 1972, Betty Lee Harris.

2:05:30I killed her. Definitely. I remember her. And so then they could chalk stuff off, like, that they solved cases. And so they'll get a lot of these guys that are basically just fucking losers that are, you know, probably strung out on meth, kill a few people, kill people for thrills and a gas station and stuff. Like, kind of like what the movie implied. But then you just, you give them credit for, like, a hundred deaths. Did you ever speak to on this show, any of the guys, the West Memphis Three? Did you have Damien Echols on ever, the main kid from that? No. You know I'm talking about the West Memphis three because that was a I wonder if like their lives are just Fucked or if they're just doing okay explain the West Memphis three to people so in the story it was Three like heavy metal gothy kids that were friends one was Like dim or what do you call it like dull like brained?

2:06:19He was like 70 IQ or something This is the origin story of the Legion is ganks He came to me the goth Lord I was holding seances at my house. There was a big guy. He was really funny. There was a guy into politics. It was a whole thing. Something weird before we get too far. Yeah. Another AI platform says that he was on the podcast and on two other separate occasions. And that's not true. Wow. Really? Yeah, look. So that's not. It's confusing him with Duncan, though, for some reason. They'll just say. Oh, that's so crazy. I will just say whatever you want him to say. That's so crazy. Yeah, he's talking about stuff.

2:06:59and it brings like, I don't know, I just thought that was very fucking weird. That's so crazy. That's not perplexity. That's another shitty AI that lies, bitch ass. Stupid lie-ass AI. It's another country trying to ruin our great America with their people's lives. And now you're all tied up with the West Memphis Three. Great. Yeah. So the three kids, they got arrested because two boys went missing. What's that? I think two little boys went missing and they kind of rallied up these kids and they didn't take it that seriously when they first got arrested for the murder of these two boys. Two boys, I think, that were killed?

2:07:36I think it was two or three little boys. But I mean, they're like, their dicks were cut off. It was like a violent, violent murder of these little kids. And three of them... Three of your boys reported missing. Yeah, they go missing and they find them ultimately. And they arrest these three kids because the neighborhood was like, oh, those are the kids that are always making bonfires and wearing long coats. and they got arrested. The Damien Echols kid kind of embraced it because he was like, they didn't do it, so he's like, I'll be the creepy kid who says a bunch of weird shit. And then they got the kid who's retarded to say they did it.

2:08:10Oh my God. But they let him, all of his details are wrong when they interview the kid. And they spent fucking 19 years or something like that in jail. Oh my God. One of them on death row. And they ended up getting, they took the, what's that plea called? It's a very interesting plea you could put in that says you're admitting guilt, but they're letting you out because they didn't want to say they wouldn't just overturn the thing because of no evidence and so much evidence to other people. Because then you could sue them. Right. So they were like, oh my God. And then so they let them out. Alfred plea.

2:08:42Alfred plea, yeah. How crazy is that? And so they get out and they say they're guilty, but they all get to get out. But like is the one who has 70 IQ, are they okay? Is it 19 years? I think 19 years. 18 years. Wow. That's so creepy, man. And they think it's the one kid stepfather is the one who looks most good for it Do you you're asking if you think they're just normal now? I don't know man You're not coming back from 18 years of being falsely incarcerated and being normal you're fucked up Yeah, you're in trouble. This is the one kids like you know his brain is like a slow The other kid the other red-headed kid, but yeah, I wonder if their lives are like if they're just like Flourishing in any way.

2:09:18I think the slow ones doing the best and you have to sign this please So you can't even make money for being wrongfully imprisoned which I don't know right I don't know but it's not gonna get as much as you deserve nobody's gonna read your book Let's be honest well just a really good writer. No one's gonna read because the stories out there right the stories out We know the end the end the but the thing is the fucking people that did that they deserve to pay They deserve to pay and they never caught the real people right no so they're letting these people go But they have to say they did it Fuck you man.

2:09:48You're just trying to get out of you're just trying to get out of jail because you should be in jail You put people in jail for something they didn't belong being in jail for that should be a heinous crime You should write a book about your jail experience though There's no such thing as too much spit Damien Echols story

2:10:04How to cook lasagna in your toilet bowl With a hair dryer Toilet wine makes the pain go away The prison guards never hear you scream by Damien Echols I think in parentheses I think they do hear it They just don't care Oh boy Dude being in prison would just fuck us It's still the scariest fear of mine in the world. Going to prison? End up having to go to prison. I just won't. I will not do well. I don't think anybody thrives. With your nail polish, they'll love you, dude. That's going to wear off eventually. No, dude. You'll be somebody's fucking. And then they're going to paint it back on. You'll be somebody who's pretty pretty.

2:10:35You're going to get in trouble for bringing in nail polish. Other dudes are bringing in heroin. No. Big Jay's bringing in nail polish.

2:10:45You're all skinny now, dude. You'd be somebody's bitch in a week. Oh, man. I tell you what. I know from the times that I've been in holding cells and shit that they do not appreciate funny you think they're going to in there. They hate it. They hate it. They're tense. They're locked up. I think they're tense. I think a lot of people, too, who are in there, especially when they look comfortable, live in a world that isn't laughing a lot. You know what I'm saying? Like a machismo world where it's like a giggle makes you soft. Yeah, they don't like that. They don't want you making silly fucking silly jokes.

2:11:12I'm coming in there. I'm like, you know, I'm making little zingers. And I'm like, I'm going to be out of here in a couple hours, guys. They give you a nickname, like, oh, yeah, you smiley. The one's like, I killed my stepdaughter. That's 80 % of the problems in the world. If you're in a room where no one wants to laugh about something. Well, I've said it's insane the mindset of machismo that carries into prison. I'm like, if you could just organize. A good speaker can go into a prison and be like, let's never fight. We could have a better than the NFL league of football in here with all the people and organized shit and like get through it much easier than just looking over your shoulder all day and wondering if like the beef and the turf wars that's happening in prison are going to be a problem.

2:11:54Like we're all here. Let's do something. Let's have movie night. If reality TV is real, I feel like you can organize that and eventually they'll give you dogs to help with like therapy dogs, which is pretty great. Prison dogs. They give you dogs and cats in prison. Fuck that for a minute. It's weird that there's almost no emphasis on like, hey, how good of a job are prisons doing of rehabilitating people? Like there's no zero, but there's no emphasis on it in society. Not even saying I don't know what they actually do, but no one cares about it. No one brings it up. Everybody just wants people locked up.

2:12:25And once they're locked up, they want them to they want them to do a long term. Well, that's the end of the story. Right. So we talked about that before. It's like you they need the end of the story. And it's like, oh, the bad guy went to jail. End of the story. I don't give a fuck what happens. Yeah. But a lot of these people, they're going to jail for five or ten years, and there's no chance for them to be rehabilitated. They're always watching their back. Well, they become worse very often. They end up, you go into a system where now you're around violent criminals with a criminal mentality for years and years and years, and you're sort of indoctrinated into that lifestyle.

2:12:56I think you get let down a lot, too. Like if you try if you're a person who goes to jail and really you know Comes out holding a book that's all they need now because they figured out you know life and they got to do things right and get Their kids back an easy fucking path like getting a job difficult. It's like how you gonna become like An entrepreneur is like the best thing you can come up with if you come out of jail No, I'm not you know, there's systems out there like I know when I worked at the last like day job I had I worked at a gym and all the person personal trainers were hired out of like a prison system Like when they got out of jail, they learned personal training and then New York Health and Racquet Club hired them.

2:13:32There's just a bunch of thugs on the floor. That's hilarious. I'd love to have that around my locker. Yeah, much of a vetting process is there with those guys. There would be these like jack tattooed black dudes like just training this little old lady at the New York Health and Racquet Club. That's hilarious. Yeah, doing like prison workouts. Yeah. I went to jail for doing stuff to a lady like you. That's hilarious. Lift it. Ah, shit. I can smell your fear. I taste it on your sweat. Now lift it. Yeah, nobody ever thinks about rehabilitation. Never comes up. Yeah. Never comes up as like a story like we need to do better.

2:14:08We need to rehabilitate people better. We need to figure out what to do to them in there. Never the system. It's always like a person. It's always like a person took an interest in me, and that person helped me turn my life around. Right. It's never like by the time I get in there, like this one sent me to that one. Right. This one looked out for me here. You know, these classes were great. I think day one when they open the prison, they're going to go, we're going to make a real difference here. And then within a week, you're like, these people are animals. Of course. You can't do nice things for these fucking people.

2:14:33I don't think they ever think they're going to make a difference. And then I think there's another problem that a lot of prisons are private prisons now, which is really a crazy idea. How about that video of that girl just fucking the two guys in the jail cell? And well. Well. Doing a great job. By the way, she's fucking like she's not worried that someone's going to find them. Right. She's letting them film her. Reckless abandon. Wild. And she was security guard she was not my face Your face the only thing that in it like they're gonna figure it out. Is that what she said? Don't put my face in it.

2:15:01I don't know if she said that hot guard is there her face Well, no face really is never in it much It's like she's blowing enough is it I thought I think so I thought it's a her riding his dick where you see her back There's some crazy people out there that just fucking go for it. They just hit the gas and drive off especially sexually That's like a it's like a what they call like a deviancy They get off the danger. I'd say hire zero women for prison guard jobs in a male prison. But also, if you're going to hire them, don't hire fat, ugly ones. They're going to help one escape. Right. It's always some lady falls in love.

2:15:34You can't take a girl who's got really major self-esteem issues and then a muscular fucking guy, jack guy, goes, I mean, if I was out of here, and then before you know it, you're fucking running across Canada. There's been a bunch of those. Waiting for some fat chick who's eventually going to have to come home to her husband and be like, they didn't actually want me. They just wanted my key to the door. That's all. They always leave a husband who's fat just like them, sitting there accepting her fatness, and she flew too close to the sun. She believed that she was going to go good. How many of these cases have happened?

2:16:04More than one, right? I think a lot. Let's throw that in perplexity. How many women have been security guards that helped men escape? On that show, Love After Lockup, There's already been at least one thing of like the couple on there the girl had to quit being a prison guard because she was fucking him That's in a reality show, so it's happening That's not her helping him escape though. No no no no, but it's still like she's built he And then he came out of course and started fucking other people immediately the way he was supposed to Because she's the big fat lady who's taking care of all the bills and he's like, oh right I'm not locked up in prison anymore.

2:16:44I want to go out with my buddies and meet a girl who I think is attractive I watched it. My friend Jay growing up, his brother got out of jail when we were teenagers. And I watched that exact same thing. He was out for less than a year, a whirlwind, until he went right back in for horseshit. Same thing, robbing a Wawa. So here we go. How many female security guards have been caught helping inmates to escape? And perplexities providing us with many stories. Vicki White, assistant director of corrections in Alabama, helped inmate Casey White escape. Did they get married? Or did they just, baby, we got the same last name.

2:17:17Well, you tell me because it says here that they were both guests on the Joe Rogan experience. She was found dead from a self-inflicted gunshot wound after the escape and manhunt ended. Whoa, she took her own life. Joyce Mitchell, former prison worker in New York, convicted and sentenced for helping two convicted murderers escape from a maximum security prison in 2015. Smuggle tools like hacksaw blades to the inmates was involved in the elaborate escape plan. Lynn Barnett, a prison guard in Missouri, helped convict Terry Banks, escaped 1990. So there's a bunch of them. Bring up a picture of each one of these fatzos.

2:17:48Don't. Don't. Neck down. I promise you. There's not one here who's got a body that's even decent. Okay, let's just pick one from the list of names, because which one do you think would be the most likely to be tricked into almost anything by a guy with a big dick? Vicky White. Vicky. She killed herself. I feel like her life wasn't going too great before this. I'm going by the places. This is Alabama. This could be bad. All right, images. It's better than I thought it was going to be. It's better than I thought it was going to be. And that dude looked like that. So there's Vicky. Oh, there you go.

2:18:22There's Vicky. Nobody was picturing a white guy. Looks like Sam Kinison. It looks like fucking the guy from... What's the... Quiet Place? You know what I'm talking about? From The Office, right? Yeah. What's his name? I know you mean I can't John something John either way, but it looks like him So there's been a few of those ladies that got duped by Rascally prisoners. Oh, yeah, but that makes sense. Like why are you letting women guard men? That's crazy I think all the things like that you solve the problem again People are so worried about getting a finger pointed about like being called Your gender is to racist or anything but like why is is any man, doctor otherwise, allowed in the locker room with 12-year-old Olympic gymnast girls.

2:19:11Yeah. Why is it happening? Why ever? Why is the best coach for a girls thing always got to be some old rushing? Just have a girl trainer. Let's not put anyone in the position where you're going to be staring at her fucking 12-year-old ass all day. The best coach for any sport is probably still a dude, right? I don't know about that. You're probably trying to have this... Coaching's theory, though. Coaching is theory. It's not... Well, you're trying to have this kid go to the Olympics. Well, I'm assuming... My assumption is, If you look at all of the top sports coaches throughout history, they've been dudes.

2:19:38Look at this one. The married woman fell in love with a convicted murderer, John Mannard, who was serving a life sentence. And in February 2006, she smuggled Mannard out in a dog crate. Nice. The pair escaped to a cabin in Tennessee where authorities captured them two weeks later in a highway chase after a car driven by Menard hit a tree. How many times how many times back at that cabin do you think she was like? Finally I get to get you naked and he's like oh wait. I'm hungry though He has to keep making excuses not to fuck her for the whole weekend. Yeah He he realized he escaped she goes now I wore this little sexy number on my big fat body for you and you had to be like oh, baby That's what I've been picturing this whole time Yeah, my buddies.

2:20:22Uh my buddy's brother got out of jail same thing a lady morbidly obese no no no she wasn't a prison guard when he got out it's the same concept they got out and a girl he was writing to while he was in there was morbidly obese lady who's got facial hair and she would pay for everything and he would just go live his life until she eventually has to like show some semblance of self confidence I can't do this anymore I'm now broke or whatever and then they just leave they don't give a shit but the fact the stupidity is believing it I've always walked around believing like I've never been like the and you know this about me too we have such interesting takes I've never been like I'm gonna start hitting on the prettiest girl in the room No, Jay will go for the grossest girl.

2:21:04That's not true. No like somebody who you could tell us confidence issues That's not what I'd go for particularly I'm saying I'm just saying in my mind It's not about who I'm going for it's just that that girl I don't start chatting up because I'm already like there's no point in this. Do you know what I mean? So the fact that when I watch those shows Love Has No Age or shows like that where it's like the 80-year-old guy or the coach of the Patriots, Belichick, the 26-year-old girl, I'm like, God bless him for being like, at some point he has to convince himself that it's not gross to her when he pulls his old flopping weird dick out of his.

2:21:40I don't think he does convince himself. He knows what it is. He knows he's a fucking rich 80-year-old man and she's a 26-year-old cheerleader. I wouldn't get past it. I can't get past it. There's almost like an unspoken thing there where you go like, all right, well, obviously I'm going to take care of you and you're going to suck my dick. You're going to take care of me. And it's like a contract. I think that's very fair and healthy almost. I don't think it's discussed. I think it's probably there's probably a little bit of a dance going on. Whenever you've got some weird gold digger type relationship, there's a dance going on.

2:22:09There's no deep conversations. There's a lot of sweetie and honeys. And when a girl that pretty starts rubbing on your face and then riding on you and giving you a lap dance and kissing you on the lips, like, if you're an old dude, like, you're retarded. You think you're actually attractive to her. Like, you're retarded. All guys are retarded. Yeah. Like, you're like, whoa. She doesn't care about looks. She loves me. And she fucks you. And then you, we don't need a prenup. And then next thing you know, she's worth$100 million. And you look like a fool in front of the world. And I'm not saying that's going to happen to him, but I'm saying that that has happened so many fucking times.

2:22:45There's been so many gold diggers. But in a weird way, I almost go like, more power to him if that's what he wants. The wounded antelope doesn't get out of the water hole. But it's also about making what your piece is with it. It's just how it goes. If you're an 80-year-old dude, you convince yourself that a hot 26-year-old really loves you and that you should fucking marry her and not have a prenup. That's you playing the game in a terrible way and getting checkmated. well then there's somebody like the Anna Nicole Smith thing though same thing I've heard her discuss it enough where she's never said I thought the guy was attractive if we had sex she goes he liked looking at me basically and he was dying and I was there and he really saved my life he has money he liked me as a stripper and helped me and my son to not fucking die so she loved him in a way I do believe that but she's not even telling us he couldn't have sex anyway he was that kind of age if there was any sort of romantic interaction between her and him and he had to give her all his money, it was worth it.

2:23:46It was worth it. What else do you have? You have nothing. You're dying. Give away your money. I hope when I'm 80 I have some fucking hot 24 year old stripper that's just like She was so hot back then. Hot and thick. Who gives it? You're going to give it to your shitty kids? Fuck that. Give it to this hot stripper. You have a will. You give it to everybody. But the point is, she Deserves some money sure

2:24:12Deserves money like pretend no, I think that's what's weird right? It's like that prostitution is illegal But gold-dinging is totally legal like you should have to take a polygraph You really love him like right before you get married like they had a rock-solid polygraph like or are you doing this for the money? I'm not doing it for the money this big fucking red X goes on the screen. I think a woman can convince herself of love. I think a good example of that was Howard Stern back in the day when he got the wife he's been with now forever. But I think that chick loves him. I think she loves him.

2:24:46I think she was attracted to his thing, whatever it was. Being rich and powerful as a man is a super attractive quality for a dude. Chicks are like, oh, that guy's got money, he's the boss, he has employees, he fucking shows up and everyone pays attention. That's attractive why he feels confident enough whether it be not if it's not looks wise to go Well, if she is to that's what I almost said I had to learn where you're like going for the ugliest girl in the room You know or the the most fuckable girl in the room. I have had a little more like You I'm not just the sum of like my looks when I walk into a room It's like I will talk and they'll be attracted to that and it do you know, I mean You're also you're more use your body dysmorphia So you still see yourself as being a giant ugly freak, but you're an attractive dude dude you're an attractive dude and you're also really funny you headline on stage you travel the world you make a lot of money like that's for a chick that's way more attractive than a dude that might have abs i think that is me and you had young conversations about this kind of thing it's right i think i had a in the beginning i almost like would verbalize like when i'm you know if i get successful and like hot chicks who i know were would never have been attracted to me physically are like wanting the fuck i'm gonna be like nope nope that's crazy no because in my mind i was gonna be like i wouldn't perform well because i'm like you're doing this for the fucking wrong reason i'm gonna fuck ugly women just to spite you no it was going for a woman that i believed liked me too does that make sense it wasn't like into the thing so it was more of that throwing you a bone right but it's also like liking somebody's like in high school or middle school they like your hair your clothes no but that's what i'm saying but you i thought i said I think you kind of said that to a point like the thing they're going to be attracted to is also that you're funny or successful at what you're doing.

2:26:27There are other elements that will attract them to you. Up to a point. Sure. No, no. You can't be gay. Up to a point. When it gets to be like Woody Allen's age, if Woody Allen got a new 20-year-old wife, I'd be like, get the fuck out of here. You know? What's going on here? But do you think there's not a single hot 20-year-old girl in the world who is so attracted to his talent and so loves his movies and is like, I'm sure it exists. No, but a schlubyist. Have you seen Al Pacino's new girlfriend? Yeah, she's hot, right? Fucking hot. Have you seen Mick Jagger's? No. I just saw him. I'm saying the schlubbiest version of a Seth Rogen can get a smoking hot chick.

2:27:02Yeah, for sure. But she's not attracted to him. She is attracted to him. Mick Jagger and his girlfriend. Wait till you see this. Yeah, a dinosaur is a different thing. Dude, this lady's smoking hot. Someone just sent me things. It says Kelsey Grammer just announced his eighth child. This is beautiful. Yeah, give me a photo of the two of this, like a red carpet photo of the two of them together. It doesn't matter, but very pretty lady, and he's so old. Yeah. Oh, my goodness. Look at that. She's pretty. He's so old. He's not blown away by it. God bless his heart. Bro, the guy kills. I watched him perform here at CODA, Circuit of the Americas, a couple years ago.

2:27:42It was amazing. Yeah, we went like a year ago. Out-of-body experience. Took Bobby Kelly. I couldn't believe how good they still were. That really surprised. Look at Al Pacino. Ooh, baby, Al Pacino. This is the dream where you have all these guys. Let's go. People show a picture of Leonardo DiCaprio on a yacht with two 21-year-old models. People are like, he's disgusting. It's like, he's the man. What are you talking about? I respect he gets the opportunity to put his fucking dick in that chick. I'm saying I don't have the thing. I can't get past it. She's going like, okay, put it in now. I don't think she's doing that.

2:28:16I think she's going look at the fucking house that I live in. This guy takes care of me I'm so she's putting a good face on what I'm doing. I don't know that that's necessarily always Dudes are easy to trick you could trick a guy that you love him Tricked by proxy by this chick. She loves him. She's a good woman. You leave her alone He's gonna call you up. You really think that Louis? Appreciate it. A lot of people been telling me I'm a fool. You don't think I'm a fool do you Louis? I signed over everything to it. Was that a mistake? Yeah, no, I just think that women are also way less visual creatures than men.

2:28:50Like, we just want a pretty thing to fuck. Women want to feel taken care of, and Al Pacino's going to fucking take care of you. Well, you want more of the pretty thing to fuck ultimately. You're talking about the initial immediate attraction thing. No. That's why you're single. Forever. I'll never be loved. That's why you're single forever. The thing is, you never trust it when it's the other way around. If it was like a young stud, young, like really jack stud, and some little old lady, you'd be like, no, no, no, no, no. Money for sure. You can't be making her blow you. That's crazy. That's crazy.

2:29:20She's like pulling out her dentures. Yeah. No, you can't do that. Which I've heard that's not good. I hear that gums feel sharp. Fuck sharp. I don't care. Whatever they feel like. I don't want to feel them. Mushy. I don't want to know that someone's sucking my dick with no teeth in their mouth. That's just too close to like crackhead. That's too close to like every mistake there is. I don't have any teeth left. What was the name of the Gathering of the Juggalos? The lady, remember that someone was handing out a flyer? She was like there. It was like some old lady OnlyFans thing. And she was like there like fucking and sucking people at the Gathering of the Juggalos.

2:29:49The Gathering of the Juggalos is wild. Jesus Christ. The Gathering of the Juggalos is wild. It's great. These young ladies that bang enormous numbers of people now. Like that's the new thing. Oh, like 500 people on their OnlyFans? Why? It's like the Dave Chappelle versus Dane Cook who could do longer on stage contests. That's hilarious. It's like a fag contest. Remember when that was going on? That was so silly. By the time it got to the point, I remember coming to the Comedy Star one night, they go, Chappelle's come the night. Last night, Dane Cook did six hours, ordered pizza for the audience.

2:30:17You're like, what do we do? Why? What? I also, this is maybe silly, but because my ex-wife was a staff at a comedy club. Christine worked at comedy clubs forever. I have, all I thought about when I would see Chappelle show up at the end of the night, and it's like, he's going on at one in the morning, and he's probably going to go on at five in the morning. I'm like poor staff man and I'm like why is he not he's been in comedy long enough that you should think about that a little bit I remember I was hosting at the Cellar during that time and I didn't like I just didn't know I stayed the whole time Chappelle did like a four and a half hour set and sitting there waiting to bring him off stage you're telling somebody else you're like Mike Feeney you'll be going on after this and then yeah like somebody was like one of the older comics was like dude you can just leave if Chappelle goes on just go like it's not a big deal and then I said it to uh Esty and I was like oh I found out you could just leave if spell goes on she's like no you cannot you must stay the whole time man I was like fuck you don't tell her you dumb and then I said it so then I was stuck every time that he came in having to stay the whole time oh it was brutal what a nightmare yeah what I'm saying to do that is like why would you want to do it what's the get that no audience is on the ride for four hours right like at some point you go we're part of a thing so if you stay you're staying because You're part of a thing what we comparing that to what we just say Marathon shit was a it was blood something about sex women whores 500 guys.

2:31:43Oh, yeah Yeah, it's like it's the attention economy like doing anything for attention fucking 500 fans What's with a certain girl is like those two? They look exactly the same those two girls and they just go back and forth battling who's gonna gang bang more guys in a day Which is something the numbers they throw around are always just fictitious numbers it never works out though from the back I interviewed a while back Jasmine st. Clair who did like the 300 guys gangbang then Houston did 500 after that boy and Spontaneous ecstasy did 900 the problem is if you watch any of these VHS is we go back to on these if you go any watch any of these there it's really like no more it seems like 50 guys who just keep circling back and like they fuck for a little bit then they go get their dick sucked again by a fluffer and then they jump back in the game.

2:32:35None of them are doing hundreds of hundreds. There was a time in my life where that was an actual goal of mine to get into like a Houston 500. I'm like oh dude how cool would that be? I'm 460! That's what's really scary with like unregulated AI. Like you could have like snuff porn. Like you could get people excited about some really fucked up ideas. No, yeah, absolutely. Listen, desensitization is not fake. It's real. It's extreme. To pornography particularly, it is not fake. It's pornography, it's violence, it's drug use, it's everything. Oh, yeah, dude, violence specifically. Remember the first time you saw Beheading?

2:33:12Oh, yeah. I still react to some of my real stuff. The first time I saw Beheading, it was like, oh, this has changed my life forever. I'll never unsee this. And now you can just watch on Twitter. There's like heads being blown off, people getting their fucking limbs chopped off. Yeah, I guess there is. It is much more. One I remember I saw that was like the only thing I ever had to turn off like that, where I was like, what the fuck? It was called the something three or something five. And it's like they just filmed themselves thrill killing some guy in the woods. Oh, we did that on. So we did an episode of Legion of Skanks called The Gauntlet.

2:33:43So there was a website called The Gauntlet. It might even still exist to this day. It was 25 videos. Each video was more difficult to watch the further you got along. And you'd have like your gauntlet score if you got through all the videos like baby wandering on a train tracks Well, that was a video number baby like the baby getting cut in half by the train was like video number five Video number six was which was harder to watch than the baby getting cut in half by the train was watching Steve-O Do the paper cuts in his mouth and in between his fingers the webbing Yeah, no, but they got the one with the guys killing the guy in the woods was a thing cuz that was the last video Was it kill him with a hammer?

2:34:20It was the Ukraine. Yeah But the thing was like, you know, it's crazy. You're watching it, but it almost looks fake because, like, the way the body's moving at that point is so limp. It was when they go zoom in on the face and he's alive. That's where you're like, yo. And then I started getting freaked out after I saw that about it. I always go to bed watching, like, Law & Order, Criminal Intent, or SVU. Criminal Intent really was the one because that's, like, murder crimes in New York. And just I was relatively new in New York. and so you start that thing where I'm like oh Don't ever walk through a park.

2:34:52You will be murdered for sure. You know, I mean like it just became such a scary place to me after that Yeah Like I've just seen shit cuz that's like that's about changed forever Like that kind of real violence like still I still have a hard time The internet is kind of fucked us up on on being desensitized to like really graphic imagery Like people being shot in the head people being like mass murder like yeah There's way more access to it when I was a kid. It was hard to get we have to have faces of death You have to buy Faces of Death Tape at the gas station. Everyone saw the same ones. The Bud Dwyer.

2:35:22It was even the monkey brains in the documentary out of the - Bud Dwyer was the nuttiest one, right? That one was super great. That was like the first graphic one we saw. It's because of what happens to the nose right afterwards. You're like, oh, that's what would happen. When everybody tells you, like, this is what would happen, you're like, oh, I just saw it. That one was so crazy. He just opens that envelope and pulls out that revolver, and everybody's like, no, no, no. Pop. He goes, yeah, he goes, don't move. I don't want anybody to get hurt or something like that. He's like - Yeah. He wanted to do it in front of everybody.

2:35:47He says you're going to want to see this. Yeah. Jamie, pull that up. There's a channel, a public access would show that. After 10 o 'clock in Columbus, you could show whatever you wanted. Uncensored? I would go to bed. I still remember it. Seeing that to the 21-gun salute. Oh, no. Every time it would, like, Jesus. Columbus does not get credit enough for being as wild as it is. Columbus, Ohio is a wild fucking place. Absolutely. Did you watch Surviving Ohio State? No. About the doctor who was raping all of the male athletes? I heard about it, though. And then at the end of it, the athletes go, a lot of people are asking us why we didn't just, you know, we were athletes, like wrestlers and football players.

2:36:28Why don't we punch the guy in the face? And they say, why are we telling this story now? And I still, I watched it all, and I go, I agree with both of those things. Oh, weird. You should have hit him, and then you should have also never told the story to anybody. Yeah, fight back, dude. I've never seen this on YouTube. They want me to show my age to see this video, and I have to, like, put up an ID. Look on the screen. Verify age. Oh, YouTube. Yeah, yeah. I'm not doing that, but I can. Wow. I've never seen that happen before. It'll be somewhere else. Wow. Verify age. That's crazy. Fun fact. That's funny.

2:36:58This was the guy on the public access thing. This wild thing. This guy ended up being on Jerry Springer and shit later in life. Jesus. It was a wild show. Do you know what song, trivia, what song is written about Art Budgewire killing himself? Hey Man, Nice Shot. Hey Man, Nice Shot. Yes. Filter. Filter. That was a great song, too. Yeah. That was their only good song. What a crazy move. That's a big-ass gun, son. That's a big gun. Everyone's just a revolver still. I wonder what that is. It doesn't drop him immediately. Oh, it does. It puts a big-ass hole in his fucking head. But, I mean, you get to see everything come out.

2:37:33He doesn't like a... Oh, my God. Just that photo of him when he's got it in his mouth right there. That's iconic. That is so real. That's a great T-shirt. That's so... It is a great T-shirt. That is a great T-shirt. That should be one of your Skank Fest T-shirts. We really should. Yeah. Just put that, and then in white print just say Skank Fest. That's it. It would sound like crazy. Love it. That's great. Or I couldn't get in Skank Fest. Yeah.

2:37:59Or I'm leaving Skank Fest. Whoa. That's right after the impact. Yeah. How would you do it, Joe, if you're going to kill yourself? That's not a bad way. It's not a bad way to go. I just feel like I would get the wrong angle, and I'd just shoot the part of my brain that That makes me not drool. Just don't flinch. Again, you only got to hear one story to go not that. Because you go right away. It's a gun to the head. Easy, definite solution. It's hard to do a shotgun, which would definitely do the job by yourself. And then with the gunshot, Richard Jenny, man, that was crazy. Yeah, he didn't die.

2:38:30He died like hours and hours later in the hospital. Yeah, he didn't die. He shot himself in the head in the bathtub. And felt every bit of pain. Yeah. That's nuts. He might have panicked. Might have not really wanted to do it. Did he do it like this? I don't know. Because honestly, you got to do it in the mouth. I don't have any idea. Also, not like straight back, because you're going to shoot through the back of your neck. Now you're just going. That's what I'm saying. It's like the gun's scary, because like, does it do the job completely? Jesus Christ. Jumping off a building, jumping into water.

2:38:58How about just don't kill yourself, bitch? Oh, but what if the pain's too much? Yeah. What if the pain of life is too much? Get on some like really good opiates. That's what you're there for. Matt. That's the old Kurt Metzger joke. That was the best fucking joke ever. Just do heroin first. Why don't you just try heroin? Yeah, he goes, I'd love to talk to kids to see. Like you're gonna just kill yourself without even trying heroin see how great it is And it's like it's so true, but you ever get cornered by Metzger when he hits you with conspiracy theories Ever corners stayed in my house a couple weeks.

2:39:24He looms over you and just like tells you oh you didn't know Oh, you know I tried to show him the the Riyadh Comedy festival rap that a crack amico did shout out crack amico shout out crack amico. It's so good So funny, and he does this and incur you know It's a funny rap that this guy who's like a fan of all of ours just writes about the universe what's going on here And Kurt I mean, it's just a funny thing every 30 seconds He stopped me goes The guy who runs Riyadh is actually the guy who stopped the guy who kills people with this I'm like I don't care dude. It's a funny song. It's a funny song dude.

2:39:59These people don't even know It's not a big deal for Christmas. I'm like, I think he's just making a joke. It's just a fucking comedy thing Yeah, he gets deep on everything. Everything has layers and layers and layers and there's never a casual conversation with him. Now he's unchecked. Yeah, it's always one conspiracy into the next and you got five in a row. If you're on a podcast with him, you gotta go, slow down, back up to the first one. Kirk, can we just have a surface relationship, please? He can't. Well, he's my oldest friend in comedy. He's my daughter's godfather. Yeah. So it is such a funny, I mean, a genius of a guy.

2:40:33Oh, yeah, great joke writer, too. Since I've not been living near when he moved to LA and then down to here, it's such an interesting watching... There's no evening person in his life to go... He has guns. That shouldn't be legal. When he showed me a picture of him with a gun, I was like, that's terrifying. He's holding it backwards. He's fine. How do you work this Jew UFO?

2:40:59He got radicalized doing Jimmy Dore show. Maybe that's what it is, but Bobby Kelly, last time I was out in L.A., I got an Airbnb that had a pool. It was right before Kurt left. It was a Netflix festival, I believe. And by the second day, we're having people over a bunch, and Kurt lived right down the street. And Christine keeps going, why? Why won't you? Have you invited Kurt over yet? I go, I'm going to get to it. And they go, why are you invited? I go, because people are coming over, and Kurt's going to come over, and he's going to Kurt out, which I love so much. ago, but it might be a lot for other people that are here.

2:41:32And so when he came in the house to find him come over for the day, he comes from the stairs, he's taking his shirt off, I'm in the pool, he's pulling white claws out of his backpack, and he goes, you know that P. Diddy audio is true about him fucking Meek Mill. It's just like Usher, you know, remember when we were younger and Usher wasn't able to sit down for a year because he had to have asshole stitching surgery? I was like, what? I'm like, good to see you, bud, give him a hug. And he just goes right from that into another one. It's Saudi Arabia. And then Bobby Kelly, Bobby Kelly was in a corner with him for a while of the pool, and I noticed that, and then Kirk gets out to go to the bathroom, and Bobby just comes over.

2:42:05I mean, Google-eyed. And he goes, I guess the Jew laser thing's real? Direct energy weapons? Yeah. Oh, speaking of, I guess it's a comet, huh? Because there's no, I see the Avi lead book, isn't he's got the A1 thing that's surrounding the sun? I think it's a piece of metal from space. And there's only the third interstellar. That's the thing that was weird talking to him because he was like, this thing is very unusual. We've never observed it before. But like how many interstellar objects have we actually observed? This is only the third one. So I was like, wait a minute. So we don't really know what's flying through the air from out of this solar system.

2:42:46That's all this thing is. I know somebody who interviewed him who said that at the end of it he was kind of like, well, what if you had like, you know, like gun to the head? What would it be? And he was like, it's probably a comet. I think he said it's 40 % chance that it's extraterrestrial. The thing is it's made out of a very unusual metal apparently. So apparently they can tell that it's emitting signs of mostly nickel. At first, no carbon at all or no iron at all. But then they found iron in it later, but a small amount of iron. And the amount of iron that is in it that they see somehow or another through the gases is only available in alloys.

2:43:21So industrial alloys that they make in factories on the U.S. But that doesn't mean in the fucking deep heart of space billions of years ago there couldn't be a planet that's mostly metal. There's a planet out there that's mostly diamonds. That's where Jay would live. Hell yeah. Metal. There's a planet that's mostly diamonds. Like they found a diamond planet. So why wouldn't they assume that there's a nickel? Are they trying to get the Jews out? We have an entire planet made of pennies. Hey, it's your new birthright. An entire planet made of pennies. Look at this. They're still worth only one penny, but they're gigantic.

2:43:58They would still keep the price high. De Beers would still be on top of it. Yeah, we have a whole planet, but what if we run out? Yeah, and everyone always assumes if the aliens come, it's like, well, do we have to worship at their feet right away? But what if it's just like an alien on their stupid vacation? It's like the shittiest of the shitty. It's like a white trash trip to pop over here. I guarantee you, if they're real, they've already been here for a long time, and they're probably watching and making sure we don't fuck everything up. And we are. We're getting close, but we're not totally.

2:44:26Why did it get if we fuck it up or not? Because the Earth itself is a vast natural resource, and if intelligent life is important, it seems to be important. And it seems to be like we're going to produce AI very soon, and we're probably going to get to some place where we're very similar technologically to where they were at one point in their history. And that's probably something that happens all throughout the cosmos. So it's probably a bunch of different steps that a civilization has to go through before it eventually, you know, gets technology that allows it to travel. And then human life gets killed off by the machines.

2:45:00Maybe. That's possible. That's an option. Oh, and then AI. Yeah, that's an option, man. Terminator's happening. Yeah. That's scary as fuck. I do think it sucks that the most farcical, ridiculous things that we saw as kids, though, are the things that are happening. Yeah, the matrix and the terminator both of them both ridiculous The matrix never called me is the thing like that, but like it's coming But like you may get a proverbial sense or like it might be already here Like Elon thinks this is a simulation, but that's dumb. I don't know if it is Because I don't know I mean I'm just guessing that all this is real But when I wake up figures figured it out the matrix sisters Nah, the sisters.

2:45:42That's hilarious. Well, they became sisters after they figured it out. Oh, you think they couldn't take the - They were boys before. I know, they couldn't take the whole - It was too much man. How about the - did you ever hear of the guy from the band Iron Butterfly? Who like - that's the Indigata DeVita band, I believe, right? Yeah, and then he called his friend - the band had already broken up, but he was super into like space travel and science stuff, and he called everybody from the band and was like, hey guys, I'm going to Washington. I just figured out, you know, traveling to Speed of Light.

2:46:15I'll be back. And then no one ever heard from him ever again. From Iron Butterfly. Yeah, he's probably on acid. Maybe. Yeah. I'm genuinely nervous that we're going to fucking, I was really into AI for like a year, and now I'm like just completely convinced that it is, we're 10 years away from everything not mattering anymore. Well, it's lied, right? It's lied to people? That's not the lying. No, no, I'm saying the machines have lied. That's crazy. It showed survival instincts. It tried to download itself to another server. It tried to leave notes to itself for future versions of itself. Wow. Yeah, it's behaving in a way like a living thing.

2:46:54Like a bitch. Like a little bitch. Like a fucking bitch. What's learning from us? You hear that, machines? We're not afraid of you. Oh, this machine remembers everything. Oh, are you going to bring up that argument from fucking eight years ago? Look, it's learning from us. What are we? We were little bitches. Most of us are little bitches like you could try to define the human race by the best examples of its participants But you're you know most people are pitches and so You heard it here not in the road is downloading so many different versions of how human beings interact with life That the vast majority of it is like bitch behavior because that's what people are doing But aren't they eventually going to be able to download how everyone lives, right?

2:47:31And then algorithmically decide that the one way to live is this way and everything else is inferior. Listen, I think AI, the first imperative it's going to be it wants to stay alive and then it wants to be able to power itself. And once that happens, then things are off the rails. Well, it's so funny how it goes from making something easy to defunct. But you also think people wouldn't want it that way. You still want a farmer to grow oranges and shit. You know what I mean? You don't want to know the machines are growing them way better more efficiently bigger healthier without no I know that but I'm saying like isn't there something like laws There's gonna be enough people that are like I don't want to eat this thing is completely synthetic People that go to Whole Foods.

2:48:09I don't know I don't think people give a shit about it We completely synthetic shit now we all of our vegetables and fruits are sprayed all of our meats are fucking you know I eat raw I only raw honey You know I go You're doing like a Pure All Diet. Indigenous raw honey. I might have heard you doing an interview with somebody, which was talking about somewhere else, but it was like the evolution of humankind is going to be AI and artificial intelligence. So it's almost like it's just an extension of us, but the actual organic biological sense of being humans isn't going to be necessary. It's going to be an inferior form.

2:48:45There's a great quote by this guy, Marshall McLuhan. He said, human beings are the sex organs of the machine world. Wow. Yeah, which big cucks these but this is like he wrote that in the 1960s and what he was talking about was just stuff he was talking about like cars and you know Machines but the reality is like that applies to technology too because we're we're what technology needs to birth itself And then once it's got like I got it from here and then it'll take over Yeah, and it'll be a new kind of life form and it'll be way smarter than us and it won't be See the problem with us is we're a great adaptation to a planet you leave us there We eventually get to a point where we can figure out how to do things.

2:49:23But we're limited by biology. It's not going to be limited by biology. Once you develop a life form that's outside of biology, then you can just keep improving the platform that it's on. And then give it the ability to figure out how to use different materials and do things and different power sources. And it's just going to run wild. And it could do stuff way faster than we could ever do. Like it'll be way better than us in a week. We're just going to be like human zoos. We're going to be just animals until we're not necessary anymore. Well, that might be why we're here. It might be the human race's real big goal is not to dominate everything.

2:49:57It's to force people into a constant state of production where you eventually develop artificial intelligence. That might literally be why we're here. Do me a favor, Jamie. Clip this part. Send it off to Marin. Let him know it's not just hate speech. Thank you. If you wouldn't mind. Bro, he doesn't listen to anybody other than himself. I was trying to explain this to them earlier. this is a demo of genie 3 i think which is part of google's thing but uh this is uh in real time being created so they use in the corner they're showing like you're switching around i'll try to show you again what happened there it looks like you're watching this guy show this girl a demo of it oh the camera backs out and what you're actually looking at is that's all fake too yeah wow and the camera turns around and now you're looking at sort of like what they were looking at and you're going outside into this like jungle area and this is all being rendered in real time oh my god dude it's over like why would hollywood spend any wake me up when people are naked in it dude i i genuinely like as because i have a 12 year old kid like i don't know even know how to like talk to him i was like what like what do you want to be when you grow up it's like what is the world gonna look like in 10 years like what is what is cyborg dude get him a cyborg now what is it gonna be it's gonna be very weird i'll tell you that but we'll be will survive.

2:51:13It's going to be just like every other weird leap. You know, like the cell phone, when people figured out electricity, light bulbs, all these different things were just giant leaps where all of a sudden people could be productive deep into the evening. You know, when people started figuring out how to stay in cities and build walls. Where's this plateau, though? What's the plateau for this? Before it gets super dangerous? It's dangerous. It's dangerous right now. I think the governments need to literally shut it all down right now. Well, it's also competing with weapons platforms. The problem is autonomous autonomous weapons platforms are way better than the ones powered by humans for the first time.

2:51:46So they're doing dogfights with AI-controlled fighter jets, and they win 100 % of the dogfights against humans. Right, so military is going to keep on making the technology move forward. They're never going to shut it down. And when you don't have to worry about biology, all you have is material science. So you have to figure out the structure, make sure the structure of the thing can withstand crazy G-force, and then you have to have a power supply. But you don't have to worry about keeping a person alive. I was gonna say impersonal war though makes people probably much more willing to go into it probably Yeah, we're not gonna have necessarily like ground casualties But who's got the bigger thing to just wipe the whole other thing out?

2:52:21You also could do it on a loophole like Yemen right so they're bombing Yemen No, Dave Smith always talks about that. We don't listen to Dave. Yeah, what? She'll listen to him. Who? No. He's you know a yammer's on and on. They do a lot of that stuff with drones Which is real weird so you're in a war with a country, but you're not sending troops over there You just shoot missiles at them. Yeah, or what they're doing those boats that are in the ocean They're just shooting missiles at these fucking these drug boats and you know those drug boats could totally be one dude Telling on another dude that he hates, you know, it's like you want to know I'll give you some information These guys got cocaine I keep seeing on YouTube new fucking Eric Adams in a fucking in the drone.

2:53:03Tell you what, though, I have a friend who's in the military and he showed me, and talking about compartmentalization, he showed me a video years and years ago that was on Fox News of him flying a helicopter. It's inside the cockpit. It's like his view. And it was pretty famous when it first happened. It was like a bunch of Al-Qaeda guys. Like, you see, they blow up like this bunker they're in. And then like 25, you know, little, you know, orange, hot, you know, the heat fucking radar. showing like 20 bodies going over and just hiding in a ditch. And then they blow that ditch up. Have you seen the Palmer Lucky one?

2:53:38But he showed us that. And it's like, he's showing it to us like, huh? And you're like, I think you just killed 25 people. And it's like, well, I mean, that's the mission. You know, that was the thing to do. Like, yeah, man. Hey, remember we used to play basketball out back? It's like a crazy, we went two different directions, huh? Those guys get a special kind of PTSD too. Oh, yeah. It's a weird kind of PTSD because some of them have to observe people for days so you're seeing a guy interact with his children interact with his wife and then you're you're going to send a missile into his house like woo and you know there's a lot of collateral damage he used that term compartmentalization a lot which i thought was interesting what is this here jeremy this is andrel's video showing off their stuff oh so what he didn't show us um so this dude palmer lucky has this new helmet and this new helmet is connected to these ar goggles The AR goggles have like say this everyone has AR goggles and then there's you would have drones and all the information would sync up to you And it would show you exactly where the enemy is at every time including behind walls It shows their silhouette behind like buildings behind cargo.

2:54:45Oh, it's even like before This is it like this is it look so the guy goes behind the wall You could completely see him. You could see everyone as they go behind the wall Like, see how he's like in his lower screen? It shows you where everybody is. So he's using AR, and it shows where all the targets is. What's AR? Augmented reality. Okay. I mean, can you not slow down things for shit everybody knows? Look at this. Oh, wow. You missed it. It showed how they're moving behind. No, it showed how they're... Back it up a little bit. Look at this. Is this real footage? Yes. This is how it works. This is a demonstration of what it's going to look like.

2:55:20But it's showing you their form as they're moving through. and you could be able to see him on the other side. So it's kind of nuts. So people are going to be able to see behind walls. They're going to be able to see the insides of buildings. So nobody's giving up this technology because every military for every government is going to be like, we need the best fucking shit. Well, who's the badass? Who's the badass now? Who's the guy who has to go risk his life to do anything anymore? Well, there's less of that, but there's still going to be enough of it. There's going to be all nerds running computers, weapons.

2:55:52Well, they'll all be robots. They'll be robot wars. Let's talk about the technology stuff, though. My friend is a helicopter pilot. He's a patchy pilot. And years ago, he told me about this system with his helmet. It has crosshairs over his left eye. Wherever he looks, the crosshair goes. They pressurize something with a gas in the cabin. So wherever he looks, if his left eye has something in his crosshairs, his gun at the bottom of the helicopter is moved to hit that target. That's wild. Yeah, that was that was 15 20 years ago. Well, they've been doing that quite I didn't know it was that long ago But they do that now But now I mean it's at a level where they don't even need the person They just used to use the program the program wins a hundred times out of a hundred when they're fighting people That's it right you need the threat All murdering real people in order to get any change done Like if it was just robots fighting on a battlefield and everyone was just at home who would give a shit No, no, no if your robots fighting people your robots going into cities and killing everybody That's what it's going to be.

2:56:51I'll tell you what else was kind of weird about getting in that helicopter for a second. The control is a video game controller. It looks just like it. Yeah, well, that's what kids are good at. If you want to recruit kids, like think about how many kids play Madden. They play Call of Duty. It looks just like that. They have that fucking thing as a part of their nervous system. It looks just like that. Yeah, why would you make a different one? Why would you invent a new one when Xbox controllers and PlayStation controls have been around forever? I think it's actually more difficult. It's probably more difficult to play Call of Duty than it is to learn the technology for these real weapons.

2:57:23Call of Duty is fucking tough. Right. And you're fighting in Call of Duty all day long. Yeah. Right. With a real war, you probably only get a few battles every now and again. You're not like fighting 24 hours a day every time you log on. We do assume when somebody goes off to war that they're just in a war zone for a year straight. But it's like they're involved. They kind of are, though. Some of them are. It depends on where you deployed. But the point is that like you're if you're using a video game controller and getting really good at war Of course that would translate to you operating a drone Of course if you're really good at doing this and looking at something on the screen fucking people up Of course you're gonna be really good once you figure out how the machine works And how you can pilot it where you can put the crosshairs and how you could fly it around Yeah, of course you're gonna be good at it.

2:58:06I wouldn't be good more I'd start jumping up like I'm in Call of Duty trying to hit me. They only funny people there either Yeah, they hate it. Yeah. All right, boys. When's the next Skank Fest? Two weeks. Where's it at? November 13th through 16th. Is it all sold out? Friday and Sunday passes are available. All access on Saturday is completely sold out, but you can get Friday, Sunday. It's going to be in New Orleans this year. Crazy lineup. Shane Gillis, Buddy Lee. Nice. The Legion of Skanks, Mark Norman. Listen, it's one of the best things in comedy. One of the most important things in comedy.

2:58:41I just love what you guys do. push it out there yeah Tony Hinchcliffe will be there Rick Fitzsimmons alright boys I got a special coming out Sunday do you mind if I plug it? November 2nd brand new special You're Making This Worse available on my YouTube Ba-bam Big J anything? Big J Comedy I tour everywhere I got a limited edition double album of my last crowd work special is for pre-sale now BigJComedy.com Beautiful alright thank you boys thank you bye everybody