What to Do When Bad Things Happen to Good Penises

5 May 2026 · 55 min · 20 chapters

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In short

“The five P’s of the Pinocalypse” (priapism, penile fracture, phimosis, paraphimosis, and brief mention of Peyronie’s) explaining what they are, why they happen, warning signs, and urgent treatment steps.

Guests

Jordan Runtah and Jesse Mills (hosts). Cal Penn appears only as an intro host for another show (Earsay) and is not a medical guest. The episode is delivered as urology/medical commentary by the host urologist (Jordan Runtah).

Key claims

  • Priapism = painful erection lasting >4 hours; ischemic is blood-flow trapped and an emergency. Causes include sickle cell disease and certain meds (e.g., trazodone) and penile injections overdosed. Treatment: ER vasoconstrictors (e.g., phenylephrine/epinephrine), oxygen/transfusion for sickle cell, and sometimes shunting or implant if delayed.
  • Penile fracture: “pop,” immediate detumescence, rapid swelling/discoloration; needs prompt surgical repair.
  • Phimosis: foreskin can’t retract; physiologic in young boys, but adult inability risks infection and penile cancer; steroid creams/ring expanders may help early.
  • Paraphimosis: retracted foreskin can’t be returned; threatens glandular ischemia/necrosis; emergency dorsal slit.

Notable examples

mountain biking/saddle/snowboarding trauma for non-ischemic priapism; Dennis Rodman cited for penile fractures; “drive-by” ER drop-off story involving a through-and-through fracture with urethral rupture; tantric sex contrasted with dangerous priapism.

Written by AI. May contain mistakes. Listen to the episode to check what was said.

Chapters

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The Five P's of Male Health

3:16 to 4:32

Discussing the five P's relevant to men's health issues, especially penises.

“Folks, I get a little queasy in all things blood and sort of uncomfortable health related.”

Understanding Priapism

4:32 to 6:40

Explaining priapism, its causes, and its implications for men's health.

“It sounded lighthearted for some serious stuff.”

Types and Causes of Priapism

6:40 to 11:00

Differentiating between ischemic and non-ischemic priapism and their causes.

“So priapism, medical definition, painful erection lasts longer than four hours.”

Recognizing Priapism Symptoms

11:00 to 13:40

Identifying the symptoms of priapism and when to seek medical attention.

“And after an hour or two, it's not going down.”

Treatment Protocols for Priapism

13:40 to 14:01

Exploring treatment options and prevention strategies for priapism.

“But four hours is sort of like, wow, this is not getting better.”

Understanding Priapism: Causes and Treatments

14:01 to 21:11

Learn about the causes, immediate treatments, and medical interventions for priapism.

“I mean, if you're, you know, way out on a, you know, in a mountain cabin somewhere and it takes a drive down the hill to get to the emergency room.”

Exploring Penile Fractures: Symptoms and Urgency

23:38 to 28:00

Understand the symptoms and emergency response needed for penile fractures.

“We're hitting my, I think my least favorite peeve, the Pinoculips.”

Understanding Penile Fractures and Treatment

28:00 to 29:00

Learn about the common causes and treatments for penile fractures.

“And so it's, again, medical professionals, we're used to dealing with this.”

Recovery and Long-Term Care After Injury

29:00 to 30:10

Explore recovery timelines and proactive care after a penile injury.

“Months, you know, before all the swelling and everything goes down.”

The Social Dynamics of Penile Injuries

30:10 to 31:30

Discover the surprising social situations leading to penile injuries.

“Is there anything that they should absolutely under no circumstances do that might seem counterintuitive?”
Show all 20 chapters

Preventing Penile Injuries: Tips and Tricks

31:30 to 32:50

Get practical advice on how to avoid penile injuries during intimacy.

“So he couldn't urinate and both corporal bodies.”

Phimosis: Causes and Treatments

36:10 to 38:20

Understand phimosis, its implications, and available treatments.

“So it'll come naturally eventually when that skin releases, but for some it doesn't.”

Advanced Phimosis and Surgical Solutions

38:20 to 42:06

Learn about severe phimosis and the surgical options for treatment.

“So the last thing that you want is to miss that when it's early and it can be treated.”

Understanding Phimosis and Circumcision

42:06 to 45:14

Learn about phimosis, its treatment options, and the complexities of circumcision decisions.

“There's not any amount of steroid cream that can make that go away.”

Exploring Paraphimosis: A Medical Emergency

45:15 to 48:14

Discover the dangers of paraphimosis and when it requires urgent medical attention.

“The opposite of phimosis is paraphramosis.”

The Debate on Circumcision at Birth

48:15 to 53:15

Examine the arguments for and against routine circumcision at birth, including medical and cultural perspectives.

“And I completely understand if this is something that you don't want to answer or want to answer on a separate episode.”

Understanding Peyronie's Disease

53:16 to 55:58

Gain insights into Peyronie's disease, its psychological impact, and treatment options.

“And then the last one, again, I think, you know, we're going to hit really, really hard because this is a lot of the research and a lot of what I spend my days doing is taking care of something called Peyronie's disease.”

Breaking the Stigma: Mental Health in Urology

56:00 to 56:45

Discussing the importance of openness about urological issues and mental health.

“to help take care of you, and that's what we're going to figure out in episodes to come.”

Peyronie's Disease: Awareness and Treatment

56:45 to 58:35

Exploring Peyronie's disease, its impact, and the importance of seeking treatment.

“You had Raphael Palmeiro, who was, you know, a baseball player, maybe probably Hall of Famer.”

Personal Insights and Professional Identity

58:35 to 59:13

Sharing personal stories about professional identity and the importance of discussing sexual health.

“I know that is something that is a huge specialty for you.”
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Transcript

Automatic transcript. May contain errors.

0:00This is an iHeart Podcast. Guaranteed Human. Cardiometabolic is one of the biggest health challenges in the U.S., and evaluating patient risk across multiple conditions requires careful attention. With so many testing options and guidelines, getting a clear picture of patient health can still be a challenge. LabCorp brings clarity. Our cardiometabolic testing solutions support early risk assessment and empower more informed decision-making, so you can focus on what matters most, your patients. Visit LabCorp.com to partner with LabCorp and simplify complex patient profiles. Hey everyone, it's Cal Penn.

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1:56What were prohibited? No purchase necessary. Visit Moto.us for more details. Moto Casino. America's social casino. Let's talk about it. Let's talk about it in Meru. Let's talk about it. Let's talk about it in Meru. Welcome to the mailroom. Hell yeah. Welcome back to the mailroom. Jordan Runtah, Jesse Mills here with another episode of Just Jordan and I breaking some things down. Hey, Jordan. What's up, man? Hi. It's a beautiful day in the neighborhood. It is a beautiful day in the neighborhood. It truly, truly is. It's a perfect day to speak about. Yes, the unspeakable. When bad things happen to good penises.

2:44That's what we're talking about today. Perfectly fine penis minding its own business. And then, man, how these things get in trouble. How they get in trouble. So, yeah, you know, in medical school, we always talk about mnemonics, how to remember lots of information. And so I think when we're going to talk today, we're going to talk about the five P's because, you know, P and penis, it's really not that hard of a mnemonic. But all of these things are going to start with P in some iteration or another. Are you well hydrated? Are you ready for this? I have two bottles of water next to me just in case.

3:16Okay, good. Folks, I get a little queasy in all things blood and sort of uncomfortable health related. So researching this was a tough one for me. So I'm giving it my all. We got to talk about your journey. My journey? We got some smelling salts and you got some Caterade here as well. I mean, you know, not sponsored, but hey, we're opening. Yeah. So we're going to talk about priapism. We're going to talk about penile fracture, phimosis, which actually begins with a P, not an F, not phonetic, of course, paraphimosis, and then lastly, Peyronie's, which Peyronie's is a big thing I do in my practice.

3:53And so we're going to have multiple episodes dedicated to that. But we'll actually introduce it today just because it's one of the bad things that happen to perfectly good penises. And actually, all of these, you know, I want to dissociate any sort of personal accountability for most of these. In other words, these really are things that can happen to any person that has a penis. So it's not just like, oh, I did something wrong. So that's the most important thing is that, you know, no judgment zone, only happy days in the mailroom. But we're going to get into it, Jordan. Now, can I ask you, was that actually a mnemonic you used in medical school?

4:27No, I just made it up. Oh, yeah. Yeah. Yeah. The five Ps of the Pinocalypse. It sounded good. It sounded lighthearted for some serious stuff. But I think if I can keep you laughing, then I'll keep the color in your face. It's very Old Testament. It does. Yeah. Yeah. It's the fifth horseman. It's like the fifth beetle. You know, they were only supposed to be four of each. But then, as we know, Billy Preston shadowed that as the fifth beetle. And I don't know what the fifth horseman is, but here we got the five Ps of the Pinoculips. So, oh, man. Kind of excited, though. Priapism is a horrible thing.

5:00And I don't know. Have you heard of this condition before? Tell me what you know about Priapism. this I had heard of as just one of those mythological, like it never goes down kind of things that makes its way around the schoolyard. You know, that was sort of how I recall first learning about it. Probably a lot of these things in here is probably things that we just hear about on the, on the schoolyard, which is why I'm so happy to talk about it. Yeah. Well, you, you grew up in the era of, of, of, Viagra commercials probably where the disclaimer was, if you have an erection that lasts longer than four hours, seek medical attention.

5:33And I've always had patients come in and said, doc, if I had an reaction that lasted for an hour, you're the last person I'd call. So I think that, you know, we have to make light, but also say, no, this truly is a medical emergency. I'm glad you said mythologic because Priapus was not a god, but he was the guardian in ancient mythology and Roman mythology. He was a guardian of the gardens and Priapus, there's still frescoes in Pompeii. that they're uncovering of a large mythical feature with an even larger penis. And the thing about Priapus was that the gods did not want anybody in their garden stealing their fruit.

6:14And so if anybody came close, Priapus would come out and billy club them with his priapastic penis. And that's where Priapism comes from. So Priapus, the guardian of the gardens of the gods. Now we've got alliteration and we've got mnemonics today. How's that for a little history? Give me a thousand guesses. I would not have imagined that the origin of that word is ancient mythology. There it is, priapism. So priapism, medical definition, painful erection lasts longer than four hours. There's two types. There's ischemic, which is the worst type because it basically means that the penis is not getting blood flow.

6:51And that's where all joking stops. and you get right to the emergency room to get the blood flow to stop being dysregulated where all the blood flow in, very little blood flow out. Non-ischemic is essentially where it's almost always a traumatic event where an artery opens up in the penis, usually through like, I mean, I was a urologist in Denver for a long time. So I can imagine like a mountain biking, a saddle injury, a snowboarding injury where the board or some hard object comes up and whacks a guy in the taint, I believe is a medical term, but the area behind the testicles in front of the anus and the perineum for anybody that's keeping notes and trying to make sure my medical license is up to date.

7:36But in that perineal area, the arteries are very close to the surface. And so if you hit with say a snowboard handlebars a western saddle or in malibu a surfboard all of which i've seen then you can start this blood flow that kind of dysregulates and you're getting blood flow to the penis but the erection just never goes away because you're constantly getting pumped in so totally no stimulation you're not aroused at all and that's an emergency but it's not as dangerous because you're not losing blood flow the ischemic priapism those are the things that yeah seriously like, you know, you just, you don't have time to mess around.

8:14And some of these happen, and we don't even know why, you know, guy ends up in the emergency room, and he has this dysregulated blood flow that causes his erection that's painful. And that's the key is if you have an erection that's painful, and not going down, that's when you need to seek medical care. There's some things associated with it. Men that have sickle cell disease is probably one of the more common things we see in areas where there's a high prevalence of sickle cell, where when you have a deoxygenation of the red blood cells, they go through a process called creination. They kind of shrivel up, they gum up.

8:47And it's really just like the blood turns to sludge in the penile arteries. And that is also a medical emergency. We have to do something to take care of those guys. And a lot of times they're very young too. So not that priapism at any age is better or worse, but obviously when somebody has decades of sexual adventures in front of them to to get a priapism when they're 17, that could devastate them. We have to do something about. So sickle cell disease, very, very important cause, but often it's actually medications that do it, Jordan. And, you know, the episode we had with Dr. Shkari a few episodes ago, our sleep doctor was talking about trazodone.

9:25Do you remember what he said about trazodone? Called it trazabone. And it's because one of the side effects is a priapism. And not a lot of people know that. And I always say that, you know, don't take trazodone on vacation or someplace where you're trying to sleep and not near medical care because you can end up with a priapism. And it works. A lot of these psychiatric medicines have this, what we call anticholinergic side effect, where the blood vessels, again, don't respond normally. They dilate to the point where all this blood flow goes in and it traps the venous outflow and leads to priapism.

10:00So any medicines in that anti-psychotic pharmacology, trazodone as well can cause priapism. The most common thing is what we call iatrogenic. And iatrogenic means induced by the physician essentially. And so there's a drug that when we really get into erectile dysfunction, at some point on our podcast, we will talk about medications that we can give guys to induce an erection. And the most common outside of the pills, which really almost never cause, In fact, in 30 odd years, I've never seen a priapism that was caused only from Viagra, Cialis or Levitra or Stendra, any of those drugs. Haven't seen it.

10:41But the penile injections, which have been around for about 45 years, where a guy gives himself an injection to induce an erection, if you overdose it or if your doctor prescribes a dose that's too high, then that can lead to priapism. And that's something that we have to treat immediately. So if a guy gives an injection at home, he's making sweet, sweet love, doing what he should be doing with his penis. And after an hour or two, it's not going down. It's starting to get more painful. Then first thing that I tell guys to do is exercise, right? So run around a bunch because eventually maybe some of the heart rate will go away from penile blood flow, shut down the penile arteries and get blood flow out to the extremities.

11:27But really, they should be exercising or running to get their car keys to get ready to go to the emergency room if it lasts too long. So those are the priapisms induced by medications that, if used appropriately, are fantastic ways to improve sexual function. But they're also used recreationally. They're used in orgies and they're used in the adult entertainment industry. I've seen a lot of men that work with their penis for a living and to stay hard on set for long periods of time. then they can do themselves some damage that is irreversible. So it's a lot to download. What do you got? What'd you read?

12:04Well, I was going to ask you to sort of spell out specifically what qualifies as a priapism versus just a long-lasting erection because I've heard four hours is the cutoff point. And also sort of what does it feel like when it's becoming dangerous? Is it painful or is it almost deceptively normal? Or is it a combination? Sometimes it's just painful or sometimes it's just going on way too long. Right. So it is pain. I mean, there are people that can maintain erections for long periods of time. And as long as they're erect, but some blood flow is getting out and some blood flow is getting back in.

12:39That's normal erect physiology. And so, you know, people that practice tantric sex, for example, can have erections that last for hours. But it's not super, super rigid where no blood flow is going out. And so it's a very comfortable erection. It's a very sexual erection. And that's fine for the very small population of men that are able to achieve that level of control over their autonomic nervous system. But it's really pain. You know, so when a guy gets a priapism, it goes from being pleasurable to if you touch it, it hurts, you know, and not feel good. and any time that a guy's getting a priapism from some kind of sexual activity so again the classic are going to be the guys are doing penile injections for for pleasure when it starts to hurt really hurt and throb to the point where you can't touch it that's going to be a priapism and that's when they need to get some attention now the four hour thing just sounds like a good amount of time Honestly, you know, guys can be sometimes seven, eight, 10 hours, and I'm still able to meet them in the emergency room and bring down their private system before they do permanent damage.

13:47But four hours is sort of like, wow, this is not getting better. I really need to seek care. And so the window of where we can still do something to treat it is really what gives us that four-hour window. And so you can go on. I mean, if you're, you know, way out on a, you know, in a mountain cabin somewhere and it takes a drive down the hill to get to the emergency room. Yeah, just start driving somewhere before four hours so that you have time to get in. But it's pain, pain, pain, pain. That's the key. I'm going to regret asking this question. Oh, goody. How do you treat it? Yeah, this is super important.

14:23So first of all, you know, prevention is great. So knowing what we just talked about, making sure you avoid some of those triggers, especially or at least knowing that those medications can have those side effects. If a guy cannot get the priapism down his own. So we have a protocol here. When we teach men how to do penile injection therapy so that they can have intercourse at home without having a house call from me, which is important, at least for me. then we teach them if that erection is not going down after you've completed intercourse, you've ejaculated or had an orgasm, then the first thing you do is walk around, potentially even do cold showers because, again, you're trying to divert blood flow before it becomes dangerous or ischemic.

15:05There's very, very, very crummy evidence that taking medications like Sudafed can help because, in fact, when somebody comes into the emergency room, we inject their penis with something kind of like Sudafed to help improve that vasoconstriction so that the blood flow starts to go away from the penis. It doesn't work well, but every once in a while, the combination of just time, hope, and Sudafed helps. And so we do sometimes even prescribe it to guys that will often get priapisms with these injections that they do at home. So that's it. And then when they come to the emergency room, it really depends on the severity of their condition, Jordan, because there are guys that come in, especially if we know why they have it.

15:52So if they have sickle cell disease, for example, the first thing we do is give them high flow oxygen, because sometimes just re-oxygenating the entire body can help those red blood cells that got all shriveled up from their sickle crisis. it can reperfuse. And so oxygen helps. Sometimes even a transfusion will help putting in normal, healthy blood cells will help those guys. And so those are kind of the first two things we do along with local therapy. And the local therapy is the goal is because the priapism is way too much blood flow in and not enough blood flow out. We put in medications that will diminish blood flow in.

16:29And they're all along the lines of, you remember in Pulp Fiction, when she's having, right, the anaphylactic reaction, yes, and the epinephrine pin right to the heart. Yeah, so epinephrine works the same way in the penis, you know, so it causes those blood vessels to constrict down so that they have a little bit of time for the venous drainage to catch up. And so that's the first thing we do is some kind of blood vessel agent to help reduce blood flow into the penis. And that works. In fact, a lot of times, especially the sooner a guy gets in to the ER, the better those work. And it's a very non-morbid, very precise way to make most of those medications come down.

17:12And most emergency room physicians and practice providers in the ERs, they know exactly how much to give. It has to be done under some kind of monitoring so that somebody who doesn't have significant blood pressure changes. And so that's really important. So not something that is done casually, but done very, very diligently and under some degree of monitoring. Although I will say in our AUA guidelines for my professional organization, for men that get recurrent priapism, because sometimes this happens and we don't know why. You know, we can't, no matter all the workups we do, we can home prescribe those medications.

17:51And so phenylephrine is kind of the most common one we use that's very much like epinephrine. And so we dose it appropriately, tell a guy exactly how much to give, and that can keep some guys out of the ER. But those men, you have to really, really educate and make sure they know exactly what they're doing. So, yeah, basically it's draining the blood flow. The next step is when you really do need to sit down because there's a whole class of medical procedures or surgical procedures called shunting, where we actually stick either needles or sometimes even scalpels, blades into various parts of the penis.

18:27Usually we try to go as far out as possible. We call it distal shunt. And that, again, is to drain that blood, you know, because what you have is you have too much blood in a very, very trapped fascia, the tunic albogenia. And so you have to drain that out. And so distal shunts are kind of the first thing we do. Sometimes we can do that in the emergency room. Sometimes we have to take him to the operating room for that. But the goal is to restore blood flow as soon as possible. Because your next question is, what happens if you don't get there in time? And what happens to a priapism that is not treated?

18:59And the answer for that is, unfortunately, when it gets past that certain point of no return, whether it's four hours, six hours, 12 hours, Sometimes I've been able to save guys that have been that have had a priapism for a couple of days because sometimes there's just enough good healthy blood flow going in that we can salvage it. And when that when that comes to the point where we can't do it anymore, then there's really nothing we can do. We put them all on on medications like Viagra to see if we can get any blood flow restored once the initial insult, once that priapism settles down. Sometimes we use vacuum devices.

19:33We actually have a small trial here of using shockwave therapy, which can help reperfuse the penis. And so that's kind of promising. But ultimately, the indisposition for these guys is to do what's called a penile implant, where we have to put in, and we'll have whole episodes on this too, but where we put in a medical device that will help restore normal erectile function by using cylinders that we surgically implant that fill up with salt water to simulate a natural erection. And again, not to spend too much time on that because this is such an interesting part of medicine, an interesting part of my practice that we'll devote episodes to that.

20:11But yeah, priapisms, bad deal, bad deal. This might end up being a two-part episode. Are there certain people who are more predisposed to having that occur frequently? Yeah, not that we know of other than men with sickle cell trait or disease. Yeah, those are the guys that we really have. And education is very good among our hematologists in the community in general that, you know, I hope we have a good foundation for them to understand that that is one of the manifestations of their condition. Other than that, no, it's just, you know, drugs. Don't go on long cocaine vendors because sometimes cocaine can do it.

20:52And if you do have a friend to take you to the ER. no actually just don't maybe I should just start with just don't just Nancy Reagan it but yeah so no that's it I mean I think it's awareness awareness awareness if you have an erection super painful not going away it's time to see medical care and get rid of that that one one P of the pinoculips

21:51Thank you. today. Cardiometabolic is one of the biggest health challenges in the U.S., and evaluating patient risk across multiple conditions requires careful attention. With so many testing options and guidelines, getting a clear picture of patient health can still be a challenge. LabCorp brings clarity. Our cardiometabolic testing solutions support early risk assessment and empower more informed decision-making, so you can focus on what matters most, your patients. Visit LabCorp.com to partner with LabCorp and simplify complex patient profiles.

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23:37I think now we're next up. We're hitting my, I think my least favorite peeve, the Pinoculips. Oh, yeah. Penile fracture. Yeah. Yeah, it really does take the wind out of your sails or the blood out of the penis, as it were. But yeah, so, you know, penises are not bones, it turns out. Actually, in most mammals, penises do have bones. But humans, we de-evolutionized that years ago. And we still need it to function in a very rigid state for procreative purposes or recreative purposes. And so penile fractures are essentially just when that very tough, thickened membrane, the tunic albagenia, cracks under pressure.

24:18And usually it's when a guy is maybe either not in full control of his penis. In other words, his partner may be a man or woman handling it and causing it to crash up against something, usually the pubic bone of the partner. And under high pressure, even the thick fibrous membrane like the tunic albagenia can crack. And when it cracks, all the blood flow just shoots right out of that nice cylindrical membrane and causes immediate detumescence, where it's the opposite of priapism. You have a perfectly good erection, and it just, poof, goes away, and then you end up with what's called an eggplant deformity.

24:55That also is an emergency. It's not like four hours, but you need to come in pretty soon because we have to fix it surgically. when those two membranes disrupt, then you have a gap and that gap is going to heal with scar tissue. Sometimes it actually doesn't heal at all. And you can end up with erectile dysfunction. In fact, 50 % of the time, if a guy has an untreated penile fracture, he's going to have erectile dysfunction that needs some kind of intervention. So also, how do you know it? What happens? All right, let's walk you through this. So, or you could just talk to Dennis Rodman, who I think is the most famous person that has been very public about his multiple penile fractures.

25:35Not something to brag about, Dennis, not something to brag about, but good for my public service awareness and announcement where you're grateful for that because it starts a conversation. But essentially, if you're normally engaged in sexual activity, either partnered or solo, because I've had guys that have roughed up their own penises with a fracture, and you either feel or hear a pop, I mean, it can be an audible sound. Smelling salt's out for Jordan. I see it. He's doing good. I see it. He's counting. He's breathing. He's okay, everybody. But yeah, that pop, it's rough. It really is rough.

26:11And then immediate detumescence, because sometimes guys can pop. The other thing can seem like a penile fracture, but isn't. And I've seen guys for that is just the penis also has ligaments that keep it anchored to the body. And so just like when you pop your knuckle, you hear a little pop, you can actually snap or pop one of the penile ligaments, either called the fundiform or the suspensory ligament. And that can lead to what feels like, oh my gosh, I just did something bad. But most of the time you didn't and you didn't injure anything. It just is a little bit of off gassing of that ligament and no big deal.

Read the full transcript

26:46How do you tell the difference? Penile fracture, you immediately lose your erection and anything else, even with a pop, You may have just, you know, maybe it was your back too. Could have been just one of your vertebrae cracking because you're in the throes of it, but not a penile fracture. So really the fundamental what patients and what their listeners need to know is if they are having intercourse, they hear a pop or they feel a pop, they lose their erection. Within minutes, their penis will swell. And within minutes after that, it will become very, very discolored. So they will very much turn into a black and blue looking penis.

27:25And so something that you have to seek emergent care for. Some guys don't, and I will see them days to months later. Months? Months. Yeah, because, you know, there's, again, the overwhelming theme of this show is guys being more open about their health and their emotions and everything. And there's a shame factor. And I think if a guy does that, it's very difficult for him to go in, talk to some triage nurse in the emergency room about what happened, and then also talk to physicians and everybody else there. And so it's, again, medical professionals, we're used to dealing with this. This is a very common thing in our emergency rooms.

28:07So disavow yourselves of any shame, because if you do come to me in the chronic setting, you're most likely going to have significant scar tissue that's inhibiting normal erections, or you may even develop one of the other P's of the Pinocalypse, which is Peyronie's. And so we'll get into that here in a few minutes, but immediate surgical care, because we can often make a small incision, find where those two ends snapped, and just put a few stitches in, so you back up, Bob's your uncle. So it's not a end of the world thing if we actually get to it very soon. And most guys recover and have full function of their penises again without any long-term issues.

28:46But boy, if you don't get treated soon, it makes it much harder. And in fact, if a guy waits even a week after a penile fracture, surgical intervention is usually not very successful. And we just have to let it heal and see what happens. How long does that take to heal naturally? Months, you know, before all the swelling and everything goes down. And so again, if I see a guy, even if that is you, if you're listening now and you think you sustained a fracture in the last weeks to months, still make an appointment, go see your urologist. Because I usually will put these guys on PD5 inhibitors, potentially do a penile ultrasound, see what the state of things are.

29:23Certainly a physical exam to feel if I'm finding any plaques or any scar tissue. And so we can still be proactive because it takes about six months for any injury to fully heal, whether it's an orthopedic injury, whether it's a cut, whether it's a penile injury. And so during that six-month time period, there may be a role for adjuvant therapies, like, for example, shockwave therapies we just talked about. I've treated men for penile fractures that have not been immediately addressed and had some success with this as well. So it's never too late. We'll always figure it out. And just, you know, make sure that if it happens acutely, seek care.

30:00If it happens chronically or to one of your partners, have them seek care at whatever time in the diseased course because we can always intervene. So seeking care ASAP is crucial. Is there anything that they should absolutely under no circumstances do that might seem counterintuitive? Yeah, I mean, so there's a little bit of an interesting subcurrent that if you look at, there's the two main ways that penile fractures happen, and there's actually been pretty good literature on this, is one where you're not in bed, but you're in the backseat of a car, an elevator, on the side of a yacht. wherever that you're not normally making sweet, sweet love, penile fractures are more common.

30:47You want to hear something cool? No, terrible. I don't mean cool. You want to hear something crazy? You know, in the movies, like when somebody gets shot and nobody wants to get in trouble, but they don't want a guy to die, they just roll up to the side of the emergency room, kick the guy out, and then they take off. That happened to a patient of mine, I don't know, 15 years ago, where he was in the throes of passion with somebody that was not his wife in a hotel room. sustained an injury. And I think like barely did she let the car roll to a complete stop before she pushed him out on the doorsteps of the ER and then took off.

31:20And the social nature of what I had to do for this man to repair his fracture. First of all, it was a, it was a complete through and through fracture where he ruptured through his urethra. So he couldn't urinate and both corporal bodies. So I basically had to reconstruct his entire penis. I was actually on vacation and one My partner's called and said, Mills, there's no way I can do this. And so I come in to the ER and took about two hours or so to get all of the chambers realigned, fully reconstruction over a catheter. Meanwhile, you know, I thankfully knew from the emergency room that the person that dropped him off is no longer there and it was not his partner.

31:58Those are sort of the last words he said before he went under anesthesia and I started repairing him. So thankfully, socially, I didn't have to make that mistake and let him kind of have his comeuppance later. However, that manifested itself, not mine to judge. But yes, so the drive-by, the drive-by penile fracture dump in the ER, it's a real thing. But thank goodness he came in immediately, and I was able to fix him. So all kudos to the perp here that dropped him off. The sixth P. That's right, the sixth P. So that's, you know, maybe not having crazy jumping off the chandelier sex is a good way to keep your penis intact.

32:41And then alcohol. I mean, almost always alcohol is involved where you kind of dissociate. You don't feel normal triggers that, oh, that may have hurt. And then all of a sudden you went from that's uncomfortable to pop. So, yeah. So drunken sex sounds like a good idea. It never is. And then, yeah, just kind of be careful about your environment. That's it. keep your penis out of trouble. It's been good to you. Be good to it. I wish you were in a white lab coat right now. This is so, this is so like the more, you know, the more, you know, that's right. You know, I missed that afterschool special growing up.

33:11Think of, think if they would have done that then. And it was especially with like the voice of Morgan Freeman, some authority coming at you, you know, Orson Welles, Orson Welles. Yes. Yes. George Carlin would have been a good one. Anyhow, he would have not been able to do it straight. All right. So there's a penile fractures. Avoid. Not good. Not good. We made it through. We made it through that one. You made it through. Yeah. You kept your color. You're getting better at this. You know what? I'm getting my honorary medical degree by doing this. I'm starting to build up my tolerance. Attaboy.

33:44Attaboy.

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36:10So, phimosis, the pH of the five Ps. so this is where and obviously i shouldn't say obviously but in men that are not circumcised where your foreskin is unable to retract over the head of the penis is a phimosis and there's a physiologic phimosis in other words when boys are born the foreskin shouldn't really retract nor should parents try to retract it so if you're out there as a new dad and you're and and you decided to keep your son's foreskin then don't go and immediately try to pull his foreskin back because of listening to this episode, because there's a physiologic phimosis where that foreskin shouldn't retract until they're well into their four or five, six, seven year old.

36:51So it'll come naturally eventually when that skin releases, but for some it doesn't. And sometimes teenagers, if they've never been able to retract their foreskin, it can become a little bit of an issue because you will get dead skin cells that will slough under the head of the penis and build up scar tissue and build up debris that is difficult to clear. And it actually can cause adhesions where that foreskin will fuse to the glands. And then that becomes difficult because it's tough to pee sometimes. Because if that opening fuses shut, then you get what's called ballooning phimosis, where every time either a kid or even a guy pees, the pee has to trickle through the foreskin before it goes out through that very tiny aperture of the head of what we call the prepuce.

37:34And so that's no good. So we have to figure out how to fix that. And the other thing that happens is they develop these bands of tissue that are so tight that you can't retract the foreskin either. And so the most important thing for anybody listening that may be dealing with this is that if you're an adult and you are unable to fully peel your foreskin back, it's not good because A, it can cause infections. And B, one of the things that men that are not circumcised at birth is that there is actually another P, I guess not really a P, but a PC, there is a risk of penile cancer. If you can't pull your foreskin back, you can get tumors.

38:13And it's usually, it comes from the papillomavirus to the HPV that if you're not vaccinated against it, you can get a virus that can lead to what we call squamous metaplasia, which then can lead on to cancer. So the last thing that you want is to miss that when it's early and it can be treated. And so if you can't withdraw your foreskin back behind the head of your penis, that's phimosis, needs to be treated. And the other part of this is that there is a little band of skin called the frenulum, which attaches just underneath the urinary opening, what we call the meatus, to the shaft skin of the penis.

38:49And some guys will have tethered frenulums or short frenulums where no matter what they do, they're like, Mills, I'm doing everything you're saying and I still can't peel this all the way back. That's called frenulum brevi and that's what can lead to bad phimosis. That also needs to be seen and treated where sometimes we can do just a little release. Just like, you know, the saying tongue-tied is when the frenulum is too tight. When babies have to get a little frenular release in the tongue, you can be cock-tied as well, I guess. I'm not sure that's ever going to take off. But anyhow, yeah, I can see by your expression, it's definitely not going to take off.

39:22We'll just keep it at a frenulum breve. You can fix that one in post, right, Jordan? I'm keeping that. Yeah, you're keeping that. I know. This is why I got to be one take mils because you will not edit. And I'm okay with it. I mean, it keeps it natural and fluid. Anyhow, phimosis, not cool. Well, fire away with questions. So tell me what's in your head about all the things that can go wrong with phimosis because we're going to get to the next thing that's the most critical thing that could go wrong with phimosis, but fire away. I mean, this is a new one for me. I hadn't really heard of this until researching this episode.

39:56Are there, I mean, what are the non-surgical treatments? Are there steroid creams? Yeah, steroid creams and physical therapy, essentially, just, you know, when I see a guy that has it, he may not even know he has it. I may be seeing him for something else. And I say, hey, have you been able to pull this foreskin back? And he says, no, you know, actually I haven't been able to. Then I teach them with, yes, beta-methasone or a couple different, there's even stronger steroids out there, but those can help release some of the inflammation, cause the skin to be a little bit more supple. But you can't keep on long-term because those can lead to penile infections.

40:35So I usually do a six-week course of beta-methasone. There's actually medical devices. There's little ring expanders because I tell you, and maybe we should even talk about this whole idea of circumcision versus non-circumcision, either as kids or as adults, because there's a lot of religious overtones. There's a lot of social overtones of this. There's a lot of guys that either wish they weren't circumcised when they were born or wish they were. And so there's some parental issues. There's some genital mutilation issues that may be worthy of its own episode. But whatever the case, if a guy has phimosis, doesn't want a circumcision, because that's the surgical cure for this, then there are these rings that you can buy.

41:20They're like little gaskets. And you put a smaller one in every day and then stretch it, stretch it, stretch it. And I've actually seen some success with those because there is a tissue expansion quality to healthy skin. for guys that have severe advanced phimosis, they can get what we call metaplastic changes where that skin is totally inelastic and it'll never stretch. And it can lead to a pretty severe condition called lichen sclerosis, which then can lead to something even worse called BXO or Balanitis Xerotica Obliterans. Anytime you say Obliterans and penis in the same sentence, it's really pretty scary sounding.

41:57You definitely don't want to obliterans to penis, right? So BXO is the end sequellum of poorly retracting foreskin. That has to be treated surgically. There's not any amount of steroid cream that can make that go away. But yeah, you let into it. So for example, earlier this week, one of my surgeries I performed was on a 58-year-old guy that had really bad phimosis, tried everything, steroid creams, tried every kind of retraction exercise, but it was making it very difficult for him to have intercourse and sometimes to even urination. And so that's somebody that I had to do what's called a circumcision and frenuloplasty, where I took down that shortened frenulum, reconstructed him and made a very nice penis for him.

42:40I hope we'll see how he heals. But everything went great surgically, so he should do well. But again, at 58, lived with his foreskin this whole time, and it was time to go. We couldn't retract it. He was starting to get that lichen sclerosis. And had I not done something in the next month to year, he could have started developing BXO. So that's what we want to avoid because that skin is completely diseased. Can't sew to it. You can't do anything other than excise it. And I've seen BXO so bad, Jordan, where we actually have to do skin grafting and actually take off that skin and skin usually from the inner thigh, kind of the most hairless portion of the thigh that we can borrow that skin to reconstruct the penis.

43:21So that's a really big deal. We don't want to do that if we can avoid it. So, yeah, phimosis, not good, but not terrible. either. And if we can cure it non-surgically, then that's what we're going to try to do. Unless a guy comes in and says, look, to heck with it. I just, I just want this over this. I don't deal with this when I'm 70 or 85 years old. How common are adult circumcision surgeries? Boy, I had no idea. Common enough, you know, and my practice is a little more specialized to the point where I don't do a lot of these, but if it's a patient I'm seeing for something else, then obviously I'll take care of them.

43:53But I think they're relatively uncommon. Most of the time, if a guy gets through childhood adolescence without getting phimosis, then he's going to be okay. Sometimes I have had men, usually in their 20s, 30s, that really want purely a cosmetic circumcision that they just, and I really want to make sure they're doing it for the right reasons. You know, I've had guys come in and said they were with a partner that didn't want them to have foreskin anymore. And that, those are the guys I really try to dissuade from because, you know, if somebody is asking you to do something to alter your body permanently, you have to come up with a really good reason for it other than doing this for, you know, a partner that may not even be your forever partner.

44:31So cosmetic circumcisions, I'm a little less excited about doing unless it's completely a hundred percent his decision. Nobody's forcing him into that. And so, so there's a little more of a mental health component to those that I want to make sure we're doing it for the right reasons. But yeah, at most of the time there's, you know, which is why very, very few societies recommend routine circumcision because, you know, we're born with it for a reason. It has some protective issues or maybe some sexual reasons that having that extra foreskin is a good thing. And so, yeah, I'm not a routine circumciser or advocate for that in any way possible.

45:08It's a decision that, you know, guys need to make on their own unless there's a medical necessity for it. So that's phimosis, I imagine. Yeah. The opposite of phimosis is paraphramosis. Look at you, the fourth P. Yeah. And so paraphimosis is when you have phimosis, but it gets really bad to the point where you try to retract your foreskin. Again, if you're listening and you're sitting there thinking, man, I just, if I pulled a little harder, then I'll do what Mills told me. And the problem is that we talked about that phymotic band and it's a tightened piece of that shaft skin that when the penis is in its flaccid state and it's in its non-retracted state, it's usually okay.

45:45But if you try to pull back your foreskin and it gets stuck behind the head of the penis, it's that band that can actually cause pretty significant damage. it can actually inhibit blood flow to the head of the penis and cause what we call glandular ischemia, which if it isn't treated, can lead to what you call glandular necrosis, which is a horrible thing, where you actually can lose blood flow to the tip of the penis and potentially require some kind of emergent surgery to either restore blood flow or, you know, sometimes in the worst, worst possible scenario, the disaster striking scenario, can you lose a little bit of the tip of the penis.

46:20So paraphimosis, surgical emergency, or at least medical emergency. And so if anybody out there has foreskin, they retract it and they can't unretract it and they start to see pain and it starts to swell. It gets to the point where you have to do something somewhat forcible to re-retract it. And that's sometimes I've been called to the emergency room all hours of the night where I have to do something in the ER to immediately restore blood flow. It's something we call a dorsal slit where we just cut that phimotic band so that we can restore blood flow and then either formally do a circumcision or let that dorsal slit heal and then have them come back to fight another day for just more of a cosmetic appearance.

46:59But yeah, paraphimosis, really, really bad. If you're a parent and you have an infant that has that where you're not getting that foreskin back over, maybe you're changing diaper, you're cleaning the penis and it just retracts and it starts to get puffy and swollen and you see the head of the penis, you have to be able to go in and have that treated. Now, for parents out there that you see that, you can sometimes just gently hold pressure and squeeze the head of the penis to the point where that swelling gets down. And then you re-retract the foreskin. And that's the first thing a medical professional is going to do as well.

47:36So not that we're at all having a podcast where I'm saying this is medical advice. More of a suggestion to try as you have your pediatrician on speed dial or at least think about going to the emergency room. but paraphimosis also very very uncommon very uncommon because first you have to have foreskin second you have to have diseased foreskin and third you have to have enough laxity to be able to retract at the point where you get in trouble but certainly something that can happen so just remember that you heard it here and that that if that foreskin is not fully unretractable back to its normal state then you have to get some kind of medical attention this is a question born completely of ignorance as most of mine are, which is why I'm here.

48:18Love this. Makes it easy for me, Jordan. And I completely understand if this is something that you don't want to answer or want to answer on a separate episode. It sounds like there's a lot of things that can go wrong if you aren't circumcised. Oh, wow. Do you have opinions on circumcision at birth? Yeah, boy, that is a whole nother episode, I think, because we should bring in a pediatric urologist. We should, you know, there's a lot of, yeah, Yeah, the answer is, yeah, I have zero opinion. Otherwise, we'll have our email just flooded with people that will either hate me or love me. But there is no in between.

48:55Yeah, so my, you know, the answer is, if there's a cultural, religious reason to do it, then that's all I'm going to say for that. Is there a medical reason? This I can answer now, and then maybe we can unpack later. But if there's a, is there a medical reason? So the answer is two. So back in the bad old days of HIV, when we had no treatment for it and people were dying at an alarmingly high rate, we did find that the penis, the foreskin, was a reservoir for HIV. So there's some interesting studies, mostly out of sub-Saharan Africa, that showed that circumcising adult populations could dramatically decrease the spread of HIV.

49:38And so there are actually global initiatives to do that. And, you know, now that we have things like PrEP and some medications even to treat the antiretrovirals to treat HIV, not as much of a public health imperative to do that. That's number one. And number two, which again, we have modern medical solutions for is, as I was saying, the rate of penile cancer is almost unheard of in men that are circumcised at birth. Because as the foreskin will hide HIV as a reservoir, it also can hide HPV or the human papillomavirus. And there's a few strains of HPV that can lead to malignancy, that can lead to a squamous cell cancer, not only of the penis, but also of the cervix and also of the throat.

50:28And so head and neck cancers are exploding in people because of the HPV. So oral sex can lead to HPV transmission into the nasopharynx and the larynx and cause cancer of the head and neck. Now that we have a vaccine against HPV that's incredibly effective, those rates should go down to the point where this is a completely preventable disease in both men and women, regardless of who your sexual partners are, you're at equal risk, as well as I should say, anal cancers too are HPV. And so that also is something that we see in both men and women. So this is gender nonspecific and certainly a public health urgency.

51:12But with the advent of the HPV vaccine, those rates have gone down. But if you look at countries where they don't routinely circumcise their youth, there are endemic rates of penile cancer, mostly in South America, where that strain of HPV is so prevalent that almost anybody that's had multiple sexual partners will have been exposed to the more malignant variety of that virus. And so the good news about circumcising infants is that they are protected against penile cancer, but their partners are not necessarily protected against cervical cancer if they're having heterosexual relations. And so in some ways, it's kind of a false sense of security, not very giving or sharing, because still, you know, HPV and genital wards is what leads to cervical cancer, anal cancer, throat cancer, and penile cancer.

52:05So anyway, so it's sort of a false sense of security if you say, hey, I'm good, but, you know, but anybody that you have sex with may not be any of those other orifices that we talked about. And so, no, I mean, vaccine is probably the most important thing we can say about HPV prevention, as well as, you know, good, not vaccines for HIV, but good preventatives so that you can never really achieve a viral load. So those two arguments are kind of out for routinely circumcising because we have good medical therapies and preventative therapies for both of those conditions. So no, I do not believe that every kid should be circumcised, but when they do have a medical problem like we just talked about where they have an anatomic issue that can lead to phimosis and then that slippery slope down to the point where they have medical phimosis that can't be treated conservatively, then, yeah, but that would be circumcising thousands upon millions of guys to treat a relatively uncommon problem.

53:06That was an incredibly graceful and incredibly insightful answer. Thank you for that. We'll see how it goes. We'll see what the trolls say. But, yeah, so that's paraphimosis. And then the last one, again, I think, you know, we're going to hit really, really hard because this is a lot of the research and a lot of what I spend my days doing is taking care of something called Peyronie's disease. But it begins with P. It is one of the more devastating things that happened to perfectly good penises. And so I'm just going to foreshadow, we're going to give them an amuse-bouche, if you will. I don't think you will, actually.

53:38You probably shouldn't. But anyhow, it came out. Again, you won't fix it in post, I know. So it's too good. Yeah, every time I really say something that's going to get me in trouble, you say it's too good. I love it. so Peyronie's is where you get this plaque formation scar tissue in the tunic alboginia which now we've learned is what keeps our penis cylindrical and what keeps us in trouble for developing priapism because it becomes this impermeable fascia and it's also what snaps then it becomes hyperpermeable in penile fracture and in Peyronie's it's where scar tissue builds up an abnormal deposition of certain bad types of collagen.

54:19And again, I mean, the genetic basis of this, we know, we don't really know how to prevent it. It could happen to anybody. We could wake up tomorrow and all of a sudden, if you have a penis and you wake up in the morning with this condition, that could happen, could happen to any one of us. And so awareness is important because there are great therapies available for this. There's great, we really have to look at this as a mental health disease too, because anything that happens to our penis really messes with our psyche, messes with our identity as men and peronies for sure. Why? Because what happens is when you get this deposition of scar tissue in that tunic albogenia, instead of having a nice cylindrical, the penis you remember before you had the scar tissue, you end up either with a bend in it, you end up with a hinge where it loses its stability.

55:08So it makes intercourse more difficult. And what we almost never talk about, In fact, I've had so many men that have come to me and their doctors have told them, you're crazy. It's not true. It can't happen. Guys will lose penile length. That scar tissue will not expand. And so penile shortening happens to essentially 100 % of guys with Peyronie's disease. And so we have to address all of those through really a multimodal way. And there's lots of treatments out there. But again, for this episode, just know it's one of the five Ps. one of the terrible things that you have to perfectly good penises.

55:44And then, Jordan, we're going to build a whole series around Peyronie's because it's so common, 10 % of guys have it, and very few urologists, only about 1 % of urologists actively treat it. So it's a disease where you can suffer in silence, and it's a condition where you really need to find a very good team to help take care of you, and that's what we're going to figure out in episodes to come. I mean, you mentioned earlier so much of what we want to do on this show is take away the stigma around some of these issues. And I think it's really important to talk about. I know this is, you know, kind of one of the more, I don't know, taboo is the right word, but one of the more things, like I've never heard this spoken about so openly and I think it's important.

56:22The older I get, the more I practice urology and I'm still doing really finite, super focused surgeries. The more my practice really evolves very, I mean, I'm happy it's doing this, but it evolves into this huge mental health component of addressing the mind that is behind some of these disorders that guys suffer. And part of it is the lack of openness. I mean, you know, to date, I remember back to, again, your playground and talking about priapism and sort of, you know, I'm guessing, I just am guessing probably because of you had Bob Dole, who was an advocate, you know, I mean, an elder statesman.

57:04You had Raphael Palmeiro, who was, you know, a baseball player, maybe probably Hall of Famer. I don't know that I should, but, but, uh, you know, celebrity superstar baseball player talking about how they take Viagra to date, you know, we've not had any, any major public figure that wants to discuss Peyronie's and yet 10 % of guys are going to develop this. So there's plenty of men out there that have it. And again, you know, not my story to tell, but only that the more that we normalize this, the more, at least that we can have a space where we can talk about it and make sure that guys are getting in.

57:37Because it's amazing how many people will suffer with any one of these conditions, but certainly Peyronie's for years before they seek therapy. And so the goal is exactly what you said, you know, is to get it out there. And there are TV commercials now. I mean, the most, there's one FDA approved drug for this called Zyaflex. It's been out for 13 years. It's something, one of the drugs that actually kind of helped develop in the phase three trials. so I have a pretty deep history of this medication and it has gotten to the point where, you know, now you are watching. I was watching my beloved Dodgers play the other day and all of a sudden a commercial came on for the bent carrot.

58:13So we're gonna talk about that as well at some point, but it's out there. And so, yeah, I'm hoping this concept of disease state awareness allows more men to come in because even in my practice, which again is very well known for treating men with Peyronie's disease, I still see guys that are coming in because they saw the commercial. So however we get the message out there, we're getting the message out there. And I think that's critical. Thank you for all you do. I know that is something that is a huge specialty for you. And I'm excited to talk more about it. Yeah. Yeah. Where to begin. But this is a good place to begin is the foreshadowing of episodes to come.

58:51So stay tuned out there in the mailroom listenership. And I think we made it. I think we made it. You were upright the whole time. I was going to say, I was vertical. I can't believe it. I'm so happy. Yeah, I mean, if anything else, we're just, you know, we're training you. You were stealing you and therefore the audience. And now my mom really knows what I do for a living. So those are all good things that we've learned in this episode for years. She thought I was a cardiac surgeon. I just couldn't break it to her. But, you know, now's the time to be loud and proud here and say that, yes, mom, I am a Peroni specialist.

59:25This is what I do. Just in time for Mother's Day. Just as, yeah. Happy Mother's Day. All right. Maybe I'll cut that one. I don't know. Yeah. I mean, no, dude, look at, I mean, it goes right. It goes both ways. It goes both ways. All right. Well, we've had too much fun messing around for another episode of The Mailroom. But yeah, the five Ps of the Pinocalypse, know them. If it happens to you, never a joke. Seek the care you need for any of this stuff. That's the take-home message here. .

1:00:02Let's talk about it. Let's talk about it Seymour. . Let's talk about it. Let's talk about it Seymour. . . . . Let's talk about it in a minute.

1:00:51This program is intended for educational and informational purposes only. It is not a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. Consult your health care provider for any medical or other related questions or concerns. The views and discussions aired on this podcast are those of Dr. Mills and do not represent the official positions of UCLA or UCLA Health.

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From the publisher

In this episode, Dr. Mills details the Five Ps of the Pen-ocalypse — a mix of real medical emergencies and under-discussed conditions that can derail even the healthiest sex life. From the urgent dangers of priapism and penile fracture to the lesser-known but equally important issues like phimosis, paraphimosis, and Peyronie’s disease, he breaks down what each one is, how it happens, and when it’s time to seek help. Along the way, Jordan plays the queasy but curious stand-in for every listener, asking the questions most people are too afraid to voice. It’s candid, surprisingly funny, and ultimately a judgment-free guide to what can go wrong — and why you shouldn’t ignore it if it does.

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