366 - If You’re Exhausted By Too Much Self-Help, Listen Now

0:02It's Louise from Team Forleo and we're reaching back into the vault today on the Marie Forleo podcast to share a beloved episode on a timely topic. In it, Marie tackles a juicy question from our audience about if we're ever done with self-improvement. You don't want to miss Marie's reply, so let's get right to it. One, two, three, four. Today is Q &A Tuesday. That means we got Qs and As, and today's question comes from Liza, and she writes, Marie, your bubbly personality and pithy thoughts and advice brighten me up every week. I'm 63 years old. My question is this. While I love and appreciate your weekly advice, tips, and contemplations, I'm beginning to find all this self-improvement exhausting.

0:44Ha ha. It's coming at us from all sides on the internet. Don't eat this. Do that. Exercise this way. Read this. Try this. Do's and don'ts, et cetera. Yes, life is an evolving experience and we change along the way, but sometimes you just want to coast and smell the roses. What do you think about all this? Can we coast? Or is this what internet culture has pushed us into? the feeling that we're constantly not enough, that we should do better, be better, go bigger. I'd love to hear your thoughts. XO, Liza. Liza, this is a really great question. And there's some misconceptions that we need to unpack.

1:20But first, there's something that I want to set straight. You know, the self-improvement industry isn't responsible for making you or me or anyone else feel not enough. We human beings are really capable of feeling not enough all on our own. And in my own life, when I look to a book or to a course or to an audio program, I'm not going there because I think that there's something deficient or something I need to fix. I'm simply looking at it as a way to enrich my life. Number one, don't blame the internet. So this is not about the internet or internet culture. In fact, if you think about this whole idea and concept of wanting to live better and be better and do better, it's been around since the beginning of time.

2:03Take a look at the Bible, right? That's like the original self-help book and it's the number one best-selling book of all time And I'll bet you can even take it back further all the way into the stone ages There's probably the caveman who thought he discovered fire until another caveman came along and told him this

2:27So please don't hate on the internet as though it created the self-help culture because it didn't It just allows you to stick your face up in it and motorboat it all day long. Which brings me to my second point, number two, step away from the self-help buffet. Liza, my sweetheart, I got a little caught when you said, self-help is coming at me from all sides. Little reality check here. You're the one that signed up for all those self-helpy newsletters, and you're probably the one that chose to follow all the self-helpy people on social media. Now, here is the good news. You raised your hand for it, which means you can also put your hand down and unsubscribe or stop following those people.

3:11So if you feel like you need a little break, that's exactly what you should do. So just remember that you are in control of what you pay attention to and what you focus on. So if you need to just step away from the self-help buffet, do it. Just make sure that you don't victimize yourself with what you chose to pay attention to. Finally, let's get to the core of your question. Is it cool to coast? So number three is yes, it is cool to coast. Let me illustrate this point with a little story. I was in Portland, Oregon, and they have these gorgeous waterfalls, Multnomah Falls, at the Columbia River Gorge.

3:47Now, you could go and hang out at the falls, or you could hike up to the top, which we did. As we hiked up the trail, I noticed that some people ran to the top. Other people were power walking. Other people moseyed along and they took lots of breaks along the way. And some people never got on the trail at all and just enjoyed the beauty of the falls from the ground level. The point is, everybody did something different. Everybody enjoyed the falls in their own way. So you got to ask yourself, you know, did the runners do the falls better than the moseyers? Absolutely not. So Liza, if you want to coast, my dear, you should coast and you should be the coastest with the mostest and really enjoy it.

4:32Because if your soul is telling you that you just need to take a break from all this self-improvement, by all means, listen to that inner wisdom and not to get too self-help-y on you. But when you listen to that small voice inside, it is the best form of self-help out there. That was my A to your Q, Liza, and I really do hope it helps. Now, I would love to hear from you. I have a feeling that you enjoy all things related to personal growth. So my question is this, how do you balance loving personal growth and not constantly feeling like you're some fixer upper project or just not good enough? Take a screenshot of this episode and let me know on social at Marie Forleo.

5:12I got to tell you, I really love when people share their aha moments with me. So if you enjoyed this episode, make sure you're subscribed wherever you listen to podcasts and better yet, leave us a positive review because nobody likes crappy reviews. Am I right? Stay on your game and keep going for your dreams because the world needs that very special gift that only you have. Thank you so much for listening and I'll see you next time on the Marie Forleo Podcast.

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