Carolla on Ellen, End of Woke Brands, Dems in Denial, and Paltrow's Bland Bio - MK Media Highlights

24:59After years and years of wokeness, someone's in an advertisement that doesn't look exactly like you. Get over it. And Nike. Nike is another brand like American Eagle. They've decided to revert back to their core competencies. They're now prioritizing tradition, conservative values, family by putting Scotty Scheffler in this new Nike ad where he's with his child. It is a beautiful Nike ad, and it's in sharp contrast to their 2020 ad, Own the Floor, where they had plus-size women. So they're switching it up, right? They tried one thing, right, the last four years with Joe Biden. In this post-November 5th world where President Trump won overwhelmingly, they're switching back now because it's popular to love your family, to be healthy, to be active, to get outdoors, to promote traditional conservative values.

25:44That is what's popular now. And so Nike and a lot of these big brands, because of the free market, because of capitalism, they are going back to what they knew years ago. And it's why you see this side by side of how the ads looked years ago and how they look now. And of course, some people are going to choose to be offended. But there is no guarantee in life that every single brand is going to have someone that looks like you in an advertisement, okay? If you want to get upset with Nike, that's fine. But you can also just go to buy the sneakers and the shorts and the athletic gear. That's what you're supposed to be in the store for.

26:13But there are also some other brands like Calvin Klein, right? Calvin Klein, Calvin Klein, which was all about hotness, right? Calvin Klein, they did all these hot ads with Mark Wahlberg and Nick Jonas. Everybody was doing these Calvin Klein ads, you know, in the 90s and the early 2000s. It was a whole thing. So Calvin Klein decided to go woke and go broke. Also, I believe they put a bunch of like non-binary women with beards and men in dresses. Calvin Klein, I don't know what was happening in those marketing meetings. We'll put it up on the screen. But they decided to go woke and go broke as well.

26:45Now, can we just have some hot people? Okay. Is it too much to ask that we have some hot people in ads? Maybe it will drive some traffic to the website. Maybe it'll drive traffic to the stores. because I don't want to see like some overweight, non-binary man, woman with a beard, like a fricking circus clown selling me underwear. You know what I'm saying? I don't need a circus clown selling me underwear. And Calvin Klein, they've now gone back to putting some hot people in ads. Okay. They have this new ad with Lily Collins. She looks gorgeous. She looks stunning. If you look at Bad Bunny, if you look at these other people in the Calvin Klein ads, they have clearly done an about face, a 180.

27:25They've left the non-binary Chewbacca trolls behind, and now they're prioritizing hotness. And what confuses me also when it comes to these brands that went so woke and so broke, non-binary people are like 0.0000 whatever percent of the population. But Calvin Klein, because of DEI, ESG, whatever, a lot of these big brands thought we need to jump on this bandwagon. This is what we need to do. Sort of like Bud Light with Dylan Mulvaney. Let's stray from everything we've known and everything that's worked for years and try this ridiculous tomfoolery, buffoonery, and clownery. Guess what? It didn't work.

28:00It didn't work. So now you've got Sidney Sweeney, you've got American Eagle, people are in an uproar, but also this is something money can't buy because you'd have to spend a lot of money to get people talking about your brand. Now they're all talking about your brand. Now last night I was talking to my producer and this reminded us of the Victoria's Secret fashion show. Now as a gay man, a 100 % gay man here in 2025, I will tell you with unequivocal certainty, I would make it appointment viewing to sit down and watch the Victoria's Secret fashion show. Okay. I love the entertainment. I love the pageantry.

28:32I love the music. They always had like Taylor Swift performing or they had Maroon 5 or whoever the hell was performing at the Victoria's Secret fashion show. And I love to see the superhuman size 0000 seven foot tall Amazonian models traipse down the runway and ridiculous clownery outfits. Okay. That is why I like the Victoria's secret fashion show. And it's probably why a ton of you also tuned in to the Victoria's secret fashion show. Well, a few years ago, they tried to cancel the Victoria's secret fashion show because Ed Razek, one of the developers of Victoria's secret, one of the producers of the iconic fashion show made a comment about, oh, trans women, aren't the fantasy trans people, aren't the fantasy, right?

29:12He should be allowed to have his opinion. Well, he got canceled. He got so fricking canceled by the woke mob. In fact, They didn't even do a Victoria's Secret fashion show for years. They did not do one for years. Well, they came back recently with a Victoria's Secret fashion show and they said, you know what? Get those skinny bitches in here. Get those size quadruple zeros in here. Put the wings on. Get the freaking music going and strut down the runway and make sure there's film in those cameras. And we all loved it. Okay. Nobody out there thinks they should look like Bella Hadid all the time.

29:43Okay. Unless you are insecure, unless you're insecure and you're not living in reality, you know that these are alien superhuman people who have personal trainers, personal chefs, plastic surgeons, estheticians, okay? Us as civilians, we're not supposed to look like superhuman models, but some folks still get offended by seeing skinny models on television. And that's sort of the dichotomy I'm trying to paint for you here in this episode right now. There are brands that are allowed to put skinny, tall supermodels in advertisements. Does that look like 99 % of the country? No. Does it look like 99 % of my group of friends and family who have all different shapes and sizes and backgrounds?

30:23Absolutely not. But if you choose to be offended, that is because you're insecure and you have thin skin. We shouldn't be so offended all the time that brands choose to give us some skinny models. You know what? If American Eagle decides we're going to put Sydney Sweeney, a skinny little hot blonde chick on genuine Hollywood in an advertisement, and you choose to be offended, that's on you. You're allowing that to erode your happiness and eat away at you. Okay. Not everyone is going to look like you all the time. I walk into rooms, I walk into meetings and sometimes I'm the only gay person in there, but you know what?

30:56I don't make being gay my entire personality. And so for these folks at home, these liberals on the internet, they feel so upset when they see Sydney Sweeney or so upset when they see the Victoria's Secret fashion show and these skinny models because they're so insecure. They need such outside affirmation all of the time they need to see someone who looks exactly like them which is tough because some of y 'all look like trolls and you look like chewbacca okay it's tough some of these like lgbtqia r2d2 non-binary folks sitting around on tick tock with the pride flags in the background as we just showed you they choose to be offended but someone isn't always going to look like you in every single tv show and they've ruined plenty of good tv shows which we'll get to later in the episode because they feel like they have to check every single box and every single quota.

31:40If you choose to be offended by Victoria's Secret, that's on you. If you choose to be offended by American Eagle, that's on you. And you should go look in the mirror and get comfortable with who you are and your own skin. That is how I live. And that's the advice I give to so many people, especially young people growing up who message me, who leave comments. And this is the advice I give to parents who are raising young kids and raising young adults going out into the world. Be comfortable with who you are. It might take a journey. It might take years, but figure out who the hell you are. So when you go out into the real world, you're strong, you're secure, you know who you are, and you can't be offended by every little thing.

32:13You can't be knocked off your rocker, okay? Because a brand puts some skinny model who doesn't look like you in an advertisement. You can't be knocked off your rocker because someone makes a negative comment about the way you look maybe on your social media, because that's the way the world is. Do the work to figure out who you are and to be confident and secure in who you are so you can go out into the world and get shit done. Okay. That's what I did. I knew growing up, I'm not going to be a six foot tall supermodel, but communication is my skill. And it's what I was put on this earth to do. So go to the drawing board and figure out what you were supposed to do in this world.

32:46And it might not be being a supermodel because for 99.9 % of us, that is not, that is not the career path laid in front of us. We aren't all going to be Bella Hadid, Gigi Hadid, and Kendall Jenner. That's okay. But you have to make the choice not to be offended constantly. And it's interesting to see these brands go from woke back to what was working for them before for decades. I think there are four things at least that are objectively in the interest of the United States. One would be immigration, controlling the border that Trump has clearly in this area and all four of the areas I'm going to list.

33:21He's clearly done some things that people rightly say are overstepped that these posses have some downsides. But controlling the border is something that's in the national interest, something a majority of the Americans want. Trump has created a spectacle, but he's also shifted the paradigm on what it takes to close the border and how effective it can be. Number two, tariffs. Trump has changed the paradigm there too. Lots of these countries now are doing what the United States wants. The coverage this week of the deal with the EU, favorable to the United States, favorable to Trump, even news organizations that don't normally say positive things about Trump, have said this is in the United States' interest.

34:01Trump got a good deal out of this. And again, the goal is clear. He wants to re-engineer global trade by leveraging the U.S. market and other American advantages without hurting the American or global economy. Right now, that appears on track. It's early. These deals are not fleshed out yet. But I'll say again, this is another area of Trump achievement in the national interest. Other presidents didn't do it, just like closing the border. And Democrats just pretend it's just a total failure. Same with number three, controlling the size of the workforce. Trump has turbocharged the capacity of a White House to control the size of the bureaucracy.

34:37He already has eliminated a lot of positions. He plans to eliminate more. This concept that we've had for decades that the federal government is just going to keep growing, he's figured out a way to change that. Again, popular, not in every respect, overreach in some areas, but this is another area that Democrats are simply criticizing. Finally, as I mentioned before, NATO, where Trump has ensured that terms and conditions apply now to be a member. He's changed the relationship from one where the European countries were free riding and freeloading to one now that's more transactional. It's a post-globalist arrangement in which the alliance can live on, but on terms that are far more favorable.

35:19to the United States. Now, again, I say again, in each case, there are objectively downsides to what Trump has done. But I'll say also in each case that overall, these directionally are positive and popular. And no other recent president has had the requisite desire or drive to change the status quo in such a fundamental way. In this country, the Democrats simply accentuate the downsides of these achievements. They find and highlight the weak links, and there are weak links, rather than grappling with what's actually happening that I think is more important, that the trends in this country in terms of public opinion have fueled Trump's rise in capacity to get stuff done.

36:01Trump has understood where public opinion was on these issues and others, and the Democratic Party has been and largely remains clueless. This is, to me, fundamental if you're thinking about the connection between what Trump has done and what's happened with the Democratic Party. And it's not just the United States. Trump has read the mood of where things are and these issues and others. And the Democrats have failed. The American left has failed on these and other issues. So if you look at Europe and the other industrialized democracies in the West, you see the same conditions that have grown over decades that have caused at rebellion against the parties on the left, out of control mass migration, out of control crime, the dominant influence of wokeness in all sorts of cultural institutions, the LGBTQ changes that many have seen as overreach, particularly in the area of trans.

36:58Censorship, overregulation, cancellation, neo-socialism, all these things exist in other countries. Kim Strasel has written about what's happened in the United States in the Wall Street Journal, very good focus that most Democrats haven't even thought about. Open borders, unrestrained spending, supports for teachers unions when they're acting antithetical to the interest of our kids, an obsessive focus on climate change, bashing the police, being against Israel, the dominance of identity politics. All of this has caused Democrats in this country to lose support from demographic groups, independent of Donald Trump, although Trump has taken an advantage of that.

37:37Imagine if the Republicans were losing support from interest groups that had long been a bedrock of their electoral success. Imagine if the reverse were happening, how much the media would cover it. This is a massive story. Democrats losing support from voters of color, from younger voters, massive. Now, Trump is singular. All these other industrialized democracies, they have the same issues. But what's different is they haven't found their version of Trump. There have been kind of poor man's versions of Trump, but they haven't succeeded. They haven't had Trump's skill. They haven't had Trump's level of aggressiveness, tough enough and determined enough to take on the old order.

38:15So what's happened to these other countries with their left parties, their equivalents of the Democratic Party, is they're weaker than they were before, but they're not crushed. They haven't declined as precipitously in most cases the way the Democratic Party has, who is now as low as they've been in poll after poll. I'm thinking about this stuff, and I talked to some Democrats who are, but very few prominent Democrats, whether you're talking about people in elective office, you're talking about activists or writers or people in think tanks, they're not even vaguely grappling with this problem in public.

38:46Why? Because they fear that the activists left will push them out of the party or cancel them, and because most of them lack the creativity and self-awareness that's required to say, how did this happen? How far back has this been going on? Some of these trends go well before Donald Trump's rise. When the few Democrats do tepidly and timidly put their toe in the water and say, what have we done wrong? They do it in a way that doesn't really give voice to a full analysis of what's happened and what needs to happen next. Because they're afraid, as I said, of being canceled by the left. They're afraid of being out of step with the activist wing of the party.

39:28So Neera Tanden, a liberal advisor to Hillary Clinton, advisor to Joe Biden, one of the smartest people in the Democratic Party, in my experience, very knowledgeable. She wrote an op-ed piece in the Wall Street Journal, not in the Washington Post, not in the New York Times, but in the Journal, a conservative editorial page. And she admitted that the Biden administration that she was part of, a big part of it, in advising on domestic policy, screwed up on the Mexican border. And she called for comprehensive immigration reform. She rightly, in her piece, put in sharp relief all the unpopular elements of Donald of President Trump's immigration policies, because some of the things Donald Trump has done are unpopular on the border.

40:07But she also felt compelled to call for a path to citizenship for some of the people in this country illegally. That is known by many Americans as amnesty. And she criticized other elements of what Donald Trump has done to try to stay on the good side of her liberal wing of her party. If the Democrats can't figure out how to lead with being tough in 2028, whoever the Republicans nominate, whether it's Vance or somebody else, they'll make mincemeat of the Democrats. In Trump world, they laugh at how even now, even after Donald Trump's victory in 2024 was clearly fueled in large port by immigration, they laugh at how much the Democrats still don't have a clue on immigration and a range of other issues.

40:55Then you think about New York City and the nomination by the Democrats of Mr. Mondani to be their mayoral candidate. The reaction to that, again, reveals how clueless far too many Democrats are about what his election would mean for their brand. Republicans are salivating at the notion of having Donald Trump be able to run against Mondami and campaign against him if he's the mayor of New York City. Now, there are people in Trump's orbit who don't want him to win because they think he'd ruin the city and some of them have pretty big investments in New York. So there's cross pressure there. But on the left, they continue to not grapple with what it would mean to elect someone with Mondami's background and stated positions on the economy and law enforcement, a range of other issues.

41:38There was an op-ed piece of the New York Times by a woman named Tressie McMillan Cotton. She argued that the opposition to Mondami is based pretty much solely on his racial heritage, rather than say the fact that he's a socialist. Okay. New York Post story this week talked about how so many prominent people in the party, in the Republican Party, plan to make Mondami the face of the Democrats. And then you have people like Chuck Schumer, Hakeem Jeffries, the leading Democrats in Congress, both from New York City. Kathy Hochul, mayor of new york the governor of new york they know how dangerous this is politically for the party they're really worried about it but except for the fact that none of them none of those three have publicly endorsed mondami yet they're frozen in amber because the base does not want to see them be outspoken against the nominee and they're worried that he may win but they're not doing anything at least overtly to stop his march to victory who can solve this for the democrats who can speak out thoughtfully.

42:40I don't think that the current Democratic Party chair, Ken Martin, or the past party leaders, Barack Obama, Kamala Harris, Joe Biden, these folks are not well positioned to try to stop Donald Trump on his march to achieving more or to do the other task that needs to be done in parallel, rebuild their party's brand, to try to come up with policies and ideas and messengers that could really make a difference. OK, Trump's going to continue to have success and failures. The Democrats may do very well in the midterms. They may well. But in each case where Trump may have failure, I don't think it has much to do with the Democrats having a capacity to affirmatively and assertively meet the moment, to rethink why voters are so down on their brand, to change their image on the economy, on social issues.

43:28Because based on all the available evidence, the Democrats actually, right now, are in worse shape than the polling suggests. because the polling is a snapshot of where we are. They're running out of time. Again, because of the nature of the midterms, because we don't know where the economy will be, we don't know what's going to happen with the Epstein story, it's possible that the Democrats will have a good 2026. But the Democrats I talk to are far less worried about 2026 in the midterms because this history suggests that even weak, the party could still do well enough to take back the House.

44:01What they're worried about is 2028. What they're worried about is the capacity of the party to redefine itself and to win back voters that'll need to win the White House, particularly because they are a party right now without strong candidates. The Democratic brand on its own right now, it appears to be on the wrong side of both the polling and of the history. And that's a big problem. It's a big problem to be on the wrong side of polling and of history. You think back to where did this start to go wrong? As I said, some of these trends have been around forever. But what's to me and talking to the smartest Democrats I know, what to me is their biggest concern is not the history, but the future.

44:42How can they fix this when so many of the dynamics on social issues, teachers unions, the economy, immigration, government spending, relationship with NATO on so many of these issues? There's no reflection about where things went wrong. And it's very hard for Democrats to criticize Donald Trump and praise him, because if you give him any praise, think about in the first term with the Abraham Accords, ask any Democrat privately, what do you think of the Abraham Accords? Privately, they'll say fantastic. Ask them what they think about shutting down the border. Most of them will say great, huge accomplishment.

45:22But in our polarized red, blue America now, it's very hard for either party to praise. And you take heat from the base if you praise Donald Trump. And they're worried about what Donald Trump would do with that phrase. But a realistic appraisal shows that Democrats are not getting on the right side of these issues. We're on the wrong side of public opinion, the wrong side of history. These other industrialized democracies, their liberal parties, have survived because they haven't faced Trump. And I'll say again, if you think Trump is a bad political athlete, you're making a mistake. Trump has lots of unpopular policy positions, but he knows how to mitigate them better than the Democrats know how to mitigate theirs.

46:06And he fights to get on the right side of issues when he's on the wrong side. Democrats, for instance, are counting on being on the right side of Medicaid and Medicaid spending and people on health care. Trump's not going to sit back passively and be on the wrong side of that. He'll do whatever he can as much as he needs to change. the Democrats have not shown the same level of awareness, the same level of nimbleness. And so I say, again, this question, how did the Democrats go wrong? And there's plenty of other things we could list. We've talked about some of them here, trying to block Bernie Sanders from winning the nomination in 2016 and 2020, trying to keep Bobby Kennedy off the ballot, lawfare against Trump.

46:47There's a whole range of things that are kind of episodic that Democrats did in part because of Trump derangement syndrome, in part because they were too wedded to the establishment of their party. It's a long list, but the core of the list is being on the right side of the issues that matter to the American people. I still rarely find any Democrats who can speak with passion about how they got on the wrong side of the issue of trans athletes and girls and women's sports. Rarely. They continue to drift back towards the ideological base of the party. You know how much my family and I love our dogs.

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49:22Pack your bags and come on through. Texas, Ohio, Alaska, we're up there too. Comfort Inn. It's calling your name Save on the stay Oh, and free waffles are yours to claim Well, I hope you like my little song Book direct at choicehilletales.com I'm Megan Kelly, host of The Megan Kelly Show on Sirius XM. It's your home for open, honest, and provocative conversations with the most interesting and important political, legal, and cultural figures today. You can catch The Megan Kelly Show on Triumph, A SiriusXM channel featuring lots of hosts you may know and probably love. Great people like Dr. Laura, Glenn Beck, Nancy Grace, Dave Ramsey, and yours truly, Megan Kelly.

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50:45The Gwyneth biography, which has been everywhere for about the past week, it's coming out today.

50:55troublemaker troublemakers everywhere just save your money okay I'll tell you what's in it and what's not in it and we can talk about it I read it over the weekend and it was kind of a slog it was kind of a slog and you know that's a lot to say for somebody who most people either love her or hate her but there's no in between so she's a polarizing figure who has been in the culture for about 30 years. She's in her 50s now. She got famous when she was in her early 20s. I mean, we've been living with Gwyneth Paltrow for a long time. And if the best you can come up with is the headlines. Okay. So there were a few takeaways we got last week.

51:37One of the most Gwyneth anecdotes ever, she complained allegedly to a friend that she had to tell Brad Pitt the difference between beluga caviar and Ocetra caviar, which I had to look up. I didn't know the difference either. And another was an Ocetra caviar. And she told the cosmetics scion, Aaron Lauder, that Brad Pitt is dumber than a sack of shit. And listen, I think Brad Pitt's got that coming. He's had it coming for a while now. He's getting it. And there are also hints in this biography that Brad, even though he was a much bigger star when they got together, was threatened a bit by Gwyneth's, what was clearly a meteoric rise.

52:24And that wouldn't surprise me. Now, Gwyneth also, according to this book, Gwyneth, the biography, I mean, you would think it was like a queen of England. It's not that, it's a short life. She's only 50. Okay. According to this book, she told the late makeup artist, Kevin Aquan, that she loved it when Ben Affleck teabagged her. I understand that there may be troublemakers among you who do not know what trouble, sorry, you know what trouble is, what teabagging is. And I'm going to pause here and pay homage to the great John Waters, whose movies like saved me as a kid. Like I, like I, I would go rent them and just like die.

53:08I just laughed till tears were coming down my face. Um, now he is credited with introducing the phrase tea bagging into the lexicon. It was a movie he did called Pecker, I think. Um, so this is, this is, I'm going to warn you it's graphic. Children are around. You don't want to listen to this aloud. Um, but it's very funny. So here's John explaining this sex act to a writer at Boing Boing in a piece that was published April 17th, 2009, John Waters. And I quote, teabagging, it sounds so dainty, doesn't it? It sounds like you took your teabag out of your fine china and you just put it daintily on the saucer out of your sight.

53:52Teabagging, John tells us, is, quote, by my definition, the act of dragging your testicles across your partner's forehead. In the UK, it is dipping your testicles into your partner's mouth. I didn't invent the term or the act, but I did introduce it in my movie Pecker. Teabagging was also a popular dance step that male go-go boys did to their customers for tips at the Atlantis and now defunct bar in Baltimore. Hope this helps. John Waters always helps in the culture. He always helps. Now, the good part. It's all good, but this is great. Ben Affleck is scandalized by this. He has been leveled by this.

54:35He is utterly furious and he is contemplating reportedly a lawsuit. An Affleck source told Radar Online last week that, quote, this isn't going away quietly. Ben is livid and he is ready to fight back. Now, I am sorry, but just like Brad I'm not sorry, actually. This is Ben's karma. I bet Jennifer Garner was livid when rumors circulated that Ben was having an affair with Blake Lively on the set of The Town. Go look at those paparazzi pics of those two. The body language. Or when he was accused of sleeping with the nanny, which he has always denied. But I mean, come on. She walked away with a drop-top Lexi.

55:12She was going on social media, posting images and video of herself to Katy Perry's Girl on Fire. Or, I'm sure, I'm sure during his infamous Oscar speech, which we all just revisited an episode or so ago, in which he said that their marriage was work. Or when he told Howard Stern that he drank himself into oblivion because he, I'm, I'm, I'm like, this is a, what do you call it? I'm not quoting directly. He felt trapped in their marriage. I mean, I think Ben can take this one. Okay. I think he can field it elegantly and just accept it as payback. And we will come back to him later as promised in the show when we get to J-Lo's latest onstage.

55:53I mean, I would call them sexploits, but that almost sounds like it's darker than that. It's actually darker than that. Now, okay, back to the Gwyneth book. There is otherwise really nothing in this book. Okay, the last half of the book is about Goop, and who cares? Do you really want to read about how she got the idea or how she came to, you know, do Series A rounds of funding or how she interacts with her employees or her managerial style? Like, do you want to see the P &Ls, the profit and loss sheets. It's so dry. This book is so dry and it's clear that nobody in Gwyneth's circle talked to the author.

56:37Nobody. The only passage, by the way, that's relevant for our purposes at The Nerve, it goes to one Amy Griffin, who I think, I think her claims are specious at best. Those claims that are in the tell we addressed again in a recent episode, but I'm going to read the passage in this otherwise snooze of a book about, well, okay, so this graph first goes to Derek Blasberg, who she does clock accurately in here. And he is the guy who last summer, Gwyneth was reportedly spreading the word that Derek had been a guest at her house in Amagansett and had fled in the middle of the night after literally shitting the bed.

57:31And he left a mess for the maids to clean up and didn't leave a note or apparently even send a text giving a heads up. Fled like a thief in the night down Montauk Highway. Okay. When I first met him, meaning Derek, I was a little dubious. Gwyneth admitted. I was like, are you a professional friend of celebrities. Yes, that's my aside. Anyway, Gwyneth, the author then goes on to say, Gwyneth's circle around this time also included Amy Griffin, wife of billionaire hedge fund founder John Griffin, whose firm G9 also invested in Goop. At first, Gwyneth told friends Griffin was one of her, quote, disciples and, quote, wants to be me.

58:20I hope Amy Griffin is listening. So good. You know it's true. But then she moved closer to Griffin and distanced from others. Well, you know, Amy is a big investor in Goop. So, you know, that's how that works. Okay. I also want to give you guys just a little peek behind the curtain as to how most of this stuff works, especially when it comes to unauthorized celebrity biographies. So the author will have a meeting with sales and marketing about six months before the publication. And they will say to the author, what are the headlines? What's the stuff that nobody knew before? And that's the stuff we're going to try to plant as a first serial, meaning like a serial edition, in like a People magazine.

59:07We're going to try to get you booked on CBS Sunday Morning or The View. or the today, you know, one of the very, like, there are very few mainstream media outlets left you can go to. So to get in is like, is really hard. And so usually what happens is unless you are bringing something really weighty to your subject matter, it's going to be the flashy stuff that gets the headlines and, and the first serial in people magazine, which I believe was like three or four pages, like with art. And that's it. And they stripped this book for those parts. There's nothing else in this book. Nothing.

59:51It just makes me angry because it's such a money grab. It's like, anyway, so Gwyneth, just the other day, this started going viral. Her ex-husband is Chris Martin of Coldplay, who has found himself in the news cycle over the astronomer couple who are having an affair and have since been fired, let go, resigned, whatever. And so I bet an astronomer went to her and they came up with this. Take a look.

1:00:24Thank you for your interest in astronomer. Hi, I'm Gwyneth Paltrow. I've been hired on a very temporary basis to speak on behalf of the 300 plus employees at astronomer. Astronomer has gotten a lot of questions over the last few days, and they wanted me to answer the most common ones. Yes, astronomer is the best place to run Apache Airflow. So if you're listening, the question in that little typing sound accompanying that was a graphic that said Q colon underneath OMG period what the actual F. Very cute, very clever. And then we get, so that's likable Gwyneth. And see, this is where I really think a better author, a smarter one, frankly, would have been able to bring some sort of cultural criticism to bear here because you have a Gwyneth who can be completely likable and funny in something like that and like winking and nodding and we're all in on the joke.

1:01:32And then you get the totally insufferable Gwyneth who last week was doing an Ask Me Anything for her podcast. And she's asked, what do you think your husband most loves about her? And this is what, buckle in, buckle in. this is a little bit of a lengthy segment but we got to run it at length for the full effect this is what we get do you want to see oh i honestly don't have a favorite he said i truly love her husband's text your physical beauty the way your body moves through space the way you disappear a little when you're working the way your hands add something to a pan your love of dirty jokes and well plastered walls how much you know about art that you feel so comfortable naked and hate fake people when you're needy when you're angry on the road i love when you chug water by the bedside at night i like the things you choose to worry about and how you handle problems i love your morning routine and when you act like i've been demanding you to get out of the bath when I haven't said a word about it.

1:02:46I love the skin on the back of your knees and the arch of your feet. And when you smile at me in bed after you've put in your retainers, I love how hard you try and how often you succeed. I can keep going if you like. I think that segment was like 28 seconds. That's a long segment, maybe longer, maybe closer to a minute. First of all, this guy clearly knows how to keep the peace at home. Okay. What do you like about me? He submits a laundry list that includes things like well-plastered walls and like moving her body, moving through space. You forgot time on that continuum, Brad. It's Brad Falchuk, her husband.

1:03:28I mean, a person with a little more self-awareness and a little less narcissism would have stopped less than halfway through that text and said, this is a lot and I'm not going to subject you guys to it. Okay. None of us want to be subjected to that. That is a provocative personality though. Okay. You got to give her that. And in this book, what we get is the equivalent, it's the equivalent of a book report. Gwyneth said this, then she did that. Then somebody else said this and did that. I don't want a summary. I want something I can sink my teeth into. So save your money. Thanks for listening to the Megan Kelly show.

1:04:07No BS, no agenda, and no fear.

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