#93: This One Mindset Switch Eliminated My Fear…

0:00Hello guys, welcome to an episode of The Pocket. This one is a solo one. As you can see around me, I've got no notes. I'm speaking straight from the heart, from the tone, whatever you want to call it today. I'm going to evolve this episode. You guys really loved the last one of me just talking off the riff. And I'm going to evolve this around a quote that I absolutely love. And if you're a regular listener of the show, you would have heard me talk about it. It's a quote from Steve Jobs, the guy that created Apple. the thing that we all seem to use and be consumed by. But he said an amazing quote, and it's, you can't connect the dots looking forward, you can only connect them looking backwards.

0:40And this has kind of been a message and an underlying truth that I've believed and applied in my life for my whole journey. And the reason for this is because we are so scared of unknown. We seem to run away when things aren't crystal clear, but the reality is that everything that's worthwhile is unknown because if it wasn't, everyone would embark on the journey, then nothing would be valuable because everyone would strive towards it. You see, the thing is about unknown is it's the very thing. It's the price tag that's loud and clear on the life and on the things that you want. It's like if you imagine yourself in a store and in this store has all of your goals, all your dreams, all the connections you want to have, the dream body you want to have, the life you want to have.

1:31You're walking around this store and what's presented is the things that you really want. Now, the reality is, is not many stores have things that are free. They come with a cost and uncertainty is a massive cost that you'll find in this store that's filled with all of your dreams. And so when I hear that quote, I listen to it and I go, that's so true. We don't know where we're going to be in the next 12 months. But when we get there, we can look back and know exactly how we got there. And, you know, I would like you guys to challenge yourself in your life right now. I would think about all of the things you've not yet embarked on because you don't know the path.

2:12It's unclear. Take me for this as an example, this podcast, right? I'm currently recording this. I'm in London and I am on a global podcast tour. Now, two years ago, this wasn't even a thing. It was an idea in my mind. Now, to think that I would be here today, two years later, you'd be kidding myself. If someone said to me that I'm going to be in London recording in a cinema production set right now, speaking, looking at a camera to thousands of people all around the world, I'd be laughing at you. I wouldn't believe it. But that's the best part. because I still embarked on the journey not knowing how to get here and if I was going to get here.

2:58It's what makes it special. You see, the more we shield ourselves from uncertainty, the less we're going to be able to get to anywhere we want in our life. And the thing is, there's this great part about a book that's called The Alchemist. And it's a very famous book. I'm sure a lot of you guys have probably read the book. But there's a part about the book that talks about your personal legend. It's like your mission, your purpose, the thing that you put on this earth to do. Your personal legend is the thing that they reference. And obviously in The Alchemist, the little boy is going on this journey to find the treasure, right?

3:36And he's realizing that it's not the treasure that matters. It's the character that he builds along the way. And it's this interesting quote that was said in the book. I'm going to hopefully be able to phrase it correctly here. but it's the closer I get to my personal legend, the more powerful the personal legend becomes. And I remember reading that and it made me stop and think because I went, when someone says chase your dreams and like you need to live by your purpose, but you don't really have any idea what the fuck you're doing, your purpose isn't clear. Your purpose isn't powerful. You can't just think about a purpose and go, yeah, that's going to spring me out of bed in the morning because you don't know what your purpose is.

4:18But the thing is, is the only way to find the purpose is to embark on the journey, not knowing the purpose, because the closer you get towards it, the more powerful it becomes. And I realized this because the more I embark on this journey, when you go back to, you know, and I said this in the last solo podcast, when you go back to that 17 year old version of me that was extremely lost and had no idea what he was doing, when he first got exposed to one little thing, you know, he then just lent into it a bit more. And then when he did that, he found out one more little thing that he could then lean into.

4:54And then one thing leads to another until you start sharpening the sword on what you like and what you don't like. Then when you can do that, you can start honing in on the things that you like, and you can disregard the things that you don't. And then the more you do that, you get really crystal clear. This term, sharpening the sword. It's perfectly representing this. It's the same for everything in life. The more we gain experience in any field, the more we're going to be able to get clear on that field. The more we're going to be able to get mature or gain experience in that field. And so the thing that's so powerful about this, and the reason I have so much passion when I say it is because I've been speaking with so many people over the last few weeks and last few months really in regards to helping people with their podcast and helping them grow their show and the biggest problem that people are having is not the actual podcast itself they're in their own way there's this hurdle that they need to overcome of i am scared to commit to myself i am scared to go all in because what comes with that is a fear there's a reputational risk that you have to run because you're putting yourself out there.

6:06There is a monetary risk. There is a time risk. There is a isolation and fear of people not resonating and connecting with me risk. There's a lot of risks that come with something like a podcast and it's so relevant because I'm realizing that it's actually got nothing to do with the process. Yes, you can get this thing set up on Spotify and maybe you don't know how to do that, but once you know, it's pretty damn simple. Yes, you can kind of learn how to edit a long form podcast after you record it. Yes, you can learn how to do some clips so you can get some AI to edit your clips. Yes, there's things that you can do that will make your process more streamlined and efficient.

6:45You can reach out to guests in a unique way. All of these things are cool and you might think that those are the challenging parts. But the challenging part of starting most things is you need to get out of your own fucking way. You're literally just blocking your own path. You seem to think that you are on a path that's not clear, but the reason it's not clear is because your fucking fat ass is lying in it. Like you need to get out of your own way. And it's like this concept around the mind being our worst enemy. It's like we seem to, if our mind was our friend, we would not want to be friends with it.

7:27Because it's so rude to us. It shuts us down and it kind of plays these mind games with us that make us question what we are doing. Even if we apply it to, say, my life right now, and if I be a bit transparent and honest with you right now, I am probably in a phase of my life that's the most exciting it's ever been. But it's also very new territory for me. There's a lot of unknown. you kind of climb one mountain and then when you get to the top you look up and you just see another one and this is kind of where i'm at now i'm entering a new league and this new league involves overheads and expenses filled with team you know you're you're uh you've got other people's livelihoods on your shoulders and it might be self-inflicted because it's not you know they're not on your shoulders but the reality is is if you're the one paying for their rent that's keeping the roof over their head so they're not on the street, there is a level of dependency and pressure that comes with that.

8:30And this is a new thing that I'm navigating having to have staff and team to help this operation grow and scale. But then if you don't do those things, then you don't grow and scale because there's only so many hours in a day. And so there's like a unknown pressure that I've not yet dealt with that I'm dealing with right now. And it's new territory. And there's two things that I could do here. I could go, no, no, no, no, no, this is, this is not it. I'm scared. I'm not having this. And then you could let go of the team and you could keep doing what you're doing and you could still do pretty well.

9:06In fact, I've gotten this far without having such a massive team. And so I could just keep coasting along doing what I'm doing now, live a pretty damn good life. but then I would feel like, I feel like there would just be this missing part in me. And, um, you know, coming back to that alchemist piece, it's your, your, your in search for treasure, but the treasure isn't the thing that's valuable. Now, before achieving the treasure, you might think the treasure is the thing that's valuable, but it takes you achieving the treasure to realize that it's not the treasure. that's the valuable thing of that whole experience.

9:46You get the treasure and you go, okay, well, this is not really that cool. However, the person holding the treasure is a whole lot better than he used to be. And that's the thing that's really valuable. And so whenever I'm going through new hurdles in my life and I'm being presented with new challenges and new pressures and new anxious thoughts that I have not yet dealt with or experienced or encountered before, I just remind myself that these are just these things that is allowing me to be a person that is a whole lot better than he once was. And, you know, better is subjective in itself as well, because people value different things.

10:28And based on our influences and our experiences, we can probably have different views of the world. But I think better for you. And so when you truly look down, look in and go, the soul-led version of me believes that I am better now. I'm more aligned. I'm more truthful to myself. And I think if we can be more true to ourself and our authentic self and who our soul really wants us to be, then we can't be mad at that. As long as we're striving towards progressing to that. I think it's a really powerful place to be. And so, yeah, I mean, I love this quote around, you can't connect the dots looking forward.

11:14You can only connect them looking backwards. Because then whenever I'm in a decision-making process, I can know that I just need to choose the thing that serves me best in this moment and disregard the rest and have trust that whatever is meant to be, will be. And everything's perfect, divine, and right on time. And I think there's a level of freedom that comes in that. You know, when I think about, say, when we go back to the time where I had some media troubles, you know, I was just interviewing Rory Sutherland, who's just an awesome guest. And we spoke for over two hours. And afterwards, when I was taking him out, his assistant was talking to me about this, like she was talking about, oh, I saw that you got in a bit of slack and you got in a bit of media trouble recently.

12:00And it brought it back to surface. And I I went, yeah, I did. And, you know, when I was thinking about all of the, I guess you could say, the so-called perceived storm that I might have been in, I wasn't actually feeling like I was in a storm in the moment. And it was quite a freeing feeling. And so it's crazy. And when I pinpoint why I was feeling so calm in all of that chaos is I think a big piece was I had trust. I trusted that it was all meant to be and there were so many different synchronicities that all lined up then as well and so when I look at it I go like this can't be me like it can't just be me that's uh that I guess is is orchestrating all of this there's got to be something greater that's putting all of this on my plate for a very reason and having that trust came it came with so much calm, so much clarity that I'm on the right path and I just need to trust the process.

13:06And yeah, I think this is why religion is such an attractive thing. I'm not religious myself. I'm very open-minded to a lot of things, but I'm not religious myself at the moment. And I think it's such a big attraction because you can have so much trust in everything because you know that God has a plan and it's convenient, right? Like that Jesus comes for the people that are in their weak moments and it's convenient to be able to have someone come to you in your darkest times and say that he's the light. And I think, and I'm not talking down on religion in any means right now, but what I am saying is it does make a lot of sense to me And I can see the attraction because if there's a way for you to be able to access trust through something in the form of, say, religion, you can have a much more fruitful life because you trust that everything's perfect and everything's meant to be and God has a plan.

14:14And so I think wherever you can access that, lean into it. And if it serves you, by all means, lean into it. I think whatever way we can access trust, there can be so much more calm in our life. And I think the more calm we can be, the more enjoyable our life's going to be. Because I think when you think about calm, right, a lot of the time we have these storms in our own mind. We make up these things that inflate in our mind. And the problem with all of that is when you're so crowded in your mind, you have no free space to invite any other cool things into your life. You know, a lot of the time when someone's lost, they don't really know what to do in their life.

14:59The first step isn't finding what to do. The first step is eliminating all of the shit that's not serving you, that's clogging up all of your mind so that you can have free space to invite the things in. You know, if you don't know what you need to do in your life, it's not about going in search for it. It's about having no noise so that you have some space. you know for me I look at the common denominators in my life whenever I am in a state of comparison whenever I feel like I am lacking whenever I'm not in a place that I want to be what's happened is I've invited too much noise in my life and this noise is consuming me whether it's social media whether it's negative people around you whether it's bad vices whether you're drinking too much whether you're doing drugs whether you are staying up too late you're mindless consuming through social media and you're on your phone before bed and you're not sleeping enough, whether you've onboarded all of these things, it's just adding so much noise in your life.

15:57The more we can remove all the noise, the more we can have clarity. We can have space. We can invite more things in our life that serve us. And yeah, it's this matter of removing the things that are not serving you and being very aware of the things that are not serving you. Because when you can eliminate them, you'd be surprised how much lighter you feel. I think you'll find that the things that are weighing you down, you're not even aware that they're weighing you down. But at the same time, they are fucking consuming you. We remove those. We can be so much more free in our life. there's a powerful lesson and takeaway from this that I would love for anyone that's not driving to be able to ponder on for a second even if it's after this episode just to really think about you and in your life and where you're at think about that quote you can't connect the dots looking forward you can only connect them looking backwards are you in a period in your life where you are struggling to take the next step you're struggling to take the leap because if you're in that moment, realize that we're not put on this earth to be stagnant.

17:14The fear, the uncertainty is the price tag of all the things in the store that has all the items that are your dreams. All of the things that you want have a cost. It's up to you. Do you want to pay the cost or do you want to be stuck in a life that you don't want to live? A lot of the time, A massive portion of that price tag is bearing responsibility and taking risk, even though you don't even know where you're going. You're in a tunnel that's dark and you cannot see light. It's up to you whether you take those steps and have trust that it's all going to be perfect, divine and right on time.

17:52And for that, I think that served me so much in my life. It's just like we just over consume decisions. We have all these decisions that we feel like we need to make when in reality, we should just choose the thing that serves us in the moment. Disregard all the others because you can't control them after you've made one. It's funny. Manifesting. The key to manifesting is deciding. It's like you are deciding that you are doing the thing and then you're disregarding all the rest. When you decide, you're eliminating all the other options. And so when we talk about this keyword of like manifestation, it's like decide that you're going to do it, come up with an actionable plan and take the actionable steps to then achieve the thing.

18:40When you decide, you get rid of all the other options and then you can actually start manifesting these things in your life. Hopefully this was helpful. Hopefully you guys enjoyed this. I think there's power in being able to have trust in your gut and in the things that serve you right now. And I think when I look at all the common denominators in my life, these have been the most life-changing. When I don't know what I'm doing, but I'm choosing the thing that feels right. And right now, I'm doing one of those things. I don't really know where I'm going to be in the next 6 to 12 months. I have big goals.

19:14I have big things I'm trying to achieve. But I'm still fucking figuring it out just as much as you are. I have no idea. And that's being completely frank. I wish I did. I wish I had clarity on what I was doing. But I don't. I really don't. And for that, I say thank you. I say all right, because bring it on. That's what makes it special. That's what makes it worthwhile. So hopefully you guys have enjoyed this. Leave us a five-star review on Spotify if you're watching this on there because it truly does help the show grow more than you know. Like I'm being genuinely honest when people can see the reviews and when I got attacked on social media, I had all these trolls come into my Spotify and give me really bad reviews.

20:04And so the reviews are lower than they normally are. And that's because we had all these trolls in. So if you've enjoyed this solo episode, all I'll ask is that you leave me a five-star review on Spotify because it will really help the show grow and help us keep getting awesome guests back on the show. And the final thing I just want to promote before we close out is if you're looking to start one of these things, a podcast, and you're looking to grow, maybe you've got a podcast and you've been stuck, I'm your guy. I went from zero to where I am today with not really a whole lot of guidance. I had to figure it all out myself and then building the best podcast school.

20:41I'm helping other people achieve the same. So if you go to the link down below or go to thepodcastjungle.com forward slash apply, you can apply to work with me directly or to join the school to help grow or start your podcast. And what you'll also get through that link is you'll get a free podcast playbook. And this will take you through basically all the fundamental things you need to know within podcasting, some hacks, some things that are in the top 0.1 % of people that have podcasts. us would know. And so if you guys are interested, hit the link in the show notes of the description below or go to thepodcastjungle.com forward slash apply to put in your details and myself or the team will reach out to you directly.

21:23Thank you guys so much. We are signing out for this episode, but I'll see you guys very, very soon. Bye-bye.

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