‘Weird Science’ With Bill Simmons and Kyle Brandt

28:51And I don't know. And there's a John Hughes documentary where she said in Weird Science she plays Mary Poppins with breasts, which I thought was a good way to describe the character. She's the best part of the movie. It's actually a really cool character and it's not what you think the character is going to be. She's created not to have sex with these dudes, but to actually make them better people. And they kind of are better people by the end of this movie. Like, mission accomplished, I guess.

29:21Kyle Brandt:I got some thoughts on that later. But she... Okay. Kelly LeBrock is good in this movie. Up to and including the final scene where she's full-on tearing up and crying as she says goodbye to the boys. It's her second movie ever. She's very, very talented. And I have to say, any interview I've ever seen with her, she seems like a really cool lady. Charismatic, witty. She busts balls. I like her. Yeah, like 10 years later, 11 years later, she's probably the Elizabeth Hurley part in Austin Powers. and probably has this whole late 90s run. But anyway, this was based on the 1951 pre-comics code comic Made of the Future by Al Feldstein.

30:00You probably don't have that one. I do not. $7.5 million budget. It made$38.9 million. Let's go. Partly because everybody who's in high school went to it, including me. Roger Ebert, three stars. Fuck yeah. coming off a really tough Raj last week oh for Snake Eyes? yeah they gave it the one star for Snake Eyes it's tough we worked it out with Raj he said weird science combines two great traditions in popular entertainment inflamed male teenage fantasies and Frankenstein's monster then it crosses them with a new myth that of the teenage computer geniuses who lock themselves in their bedrooms hunch over their computer keyboards and write programs that can change the universe.

30:45Raj.

30:46Kyle Brandt:Yeah. I never met Roger Ebert, but I'd venture to guess that there's a point in his life he wished he could have made a woman. And I get it, you know? I think he might have wanted that. No question. And he said, Kelly LeBarque is wonderful as the fantasy woman. The film was funnier, a little deeper than the predictable story it might have been. So, there you go. Okay. It's time to get into our favorite segment, the most rewatchable scene, which today is brought to you buy PayPal from now through December 8th. You can get 20 % cash back when you pay in four with PayPal, no fees, no interest, save the offer in the app now.

31:25Okay. I love the opening credits.

31:28Kyle Brandt:So do I. I love being in the gym. I love the geekdom. You know, the pants pull is coming. We get the proper, a lot of horniness in gyms in the eighties. I don't know if that's carried over now it's like a place you get a staph infection yeah also like that gym thing brings back gym uniforms where in the middle of your school day we would just all go and change out of our clothes together and then the girls would do it and then sometimes you'd have to shower together it's a really really strange thing to look back on that I had not thought about in a long time just straight up stripping down after fourth period in the middle of school every day then stripping back up yeah yeah well that goes we get the cheer then we go right into the theme song I know Let's go.

32:10I have multiple categories. Talk about the things. I know you do.

32:13Kyle Brandt:All right. So that's one. Second one, they create the girl on the computer. Anything bigger than a handful. Just great job, guys. I want it to live. You want it to breathe. You want it to aerobicize. There's a couple of nice touches in here that are very mid-80s. There's a trunk with a lock that has a bunch of Playboys and penthouses in it. Oh, yeah. Just let me tell you something. I had a few friends. I was not one of those friends, but I had a few friends with the trunk. They wear bras in their heads. And then in a really good special effects scene, they create Kelly LeBrock, which I'm going to have to give the OK Motherfucker Award for the exact moment when this movie goes up a notch.

32:58It's fucking crazy. Like, really good special effects. How were we able to do this in 1985?

33:03Kyle Brandt:And so many things. this movie moves so fucking fast that they are already creating Lisa at the eight minute mark of the movie. And I'll have you know, as I watched it as a lot, I watched this movie in a lot of sleepovers, maybe fifth grade, sixth grade, we would rewind the part on the computer where the boobs get really big, not even a human being, just a computer rendition. And I think it's important that we've revisited this topic a few times over the years. I can't explain to young people right now, if you were a young person in the eighties, how difficult it was to get even a basic image of a naked woman.

33:40Kyle Brandt:It was so hard. This is a scrambled porn apex mountain. You couldn't do it unless your friend's dad had a playboy. Like you could not get it no matter what. And so it was so crazy that those things were on the computer like that. And we just, we, we, it blew us away. You're scouring closets, looking for any cassette or anything, in guest bedroom that maybe your uncle left. You just didn't know. The liner notes of Appetite for Destruction have like an illustration of a kind of naked woman. It's really gross and weird, but I would look at it and be like, that's something. I'm the guy who would go to the magazine store and be like, can I get a Playboy?

34:14Kyle Brandt:It's for my dad. It's just nuts. I just wanted to see it and you couldn't. The candy bar scene. Yeah, how about that? Which might pop up in a couple other categories.

34:28I don't know, man. The 80s were just different. I like how fucking weird it is. Our guy, Carl the Janitor from Breakfast Club's in it.

34:36Kyle Brandt:Kapilos. Playing Dino. She likes the malaccas, Dino. Hall is just going for it. He's basically doing a Richard Pryor impersonation, which they said in the research that Hughes and Anthony McGall just both love Richard Pryor, and they wanted a scene where it's basically like, let's just do Richard Pryor for four minutes. It's bonkers. I don't know. I still enjoy watching it. they soft-tested the Richard Pryor, too. Because in The Breakfast Club, when the kids all get high, all of a sudden, Brian starts doing, like, chicks can't hold their smoke. That's what it is. And, like, Judd Nelson's laughing at him.

35:12Kyle Brandt:So someone, probably many people, including, like, studio execs, were like, yes, yes, Anthony Michael Hall doing that voice and getting high and drunk. Put more of that in the next movie. It's awesome. Whereas now they'd be like, no, no, no, no, no, no. We gotta cut that. It's unbelievable. one of the things i like about the scenes though is is how much the actors seem to be enjoying it or sitting around the table like they're actually getting like a genuine kick out of how fucking crazy he is um yeah it's the candy bar with an eye candy with an eye sure is the name of the bar uh chet tries to make gary throw up drunk gary how about greasy pork sand like all this stuff this is a classic big brother yeah this is this is a unbelievable great bill paxton and i also think that anthony michael hall is hilarious in this scene if you don't like him at the club whatever it's not aged well just playing a drunk guy when he's like no shit yet no shit yet is fucking perfect and it's it's arguably my favorite scene in the movie on the top of the stairs chet uh maybe five years later he applies for real world real world new york i I think, but doesn't make it past the, maybe the second cut, but they are thinking like, Oh, this could be our instigator house member.

36:31We got this guy, Chad from Illinois. He sent us this crazy tape. He claims that his little brother created a girl on the internet. Should we bring him in for an interview? I think they're thinking about it at least. What an all time pull.

36:46Kyle Brandt:Chet would be a real world cast member. And I like absolutely. He's basically right. He's puck in real world, San Francisco. Yeah, he's like redneck puck with a shotgun. He's sexually charged. He's a bully. He'd be great in the confessionals. He's also sneaky horny. Believe me, I say this as a guy who did it. That's all the things they're looking for. That's perfect. Spill drink at the mall. Downey and his villain friend spilling the red, what was that drink? Red icy. Yeah, with the polar bear. On those guys right into Lisa fucking with the villains. I just, listen, if we're in an 80s mall, I'm there and I'm ready for whatever's going to happen.

37:27Like, oh, it's so clean. And the stores just looked so inviting. And there was always just people happily walking around with food. It really was great.

37:36Kyle Brandt:It's so great. And yet, I'm just going to be honest with you, dude. Now I'm just thinking of Chet being on the challenge. Like, would he be on Team Real World? Yeah, I ruined you now. I'm sorry. And would he backpack Johnny Bananas? would he have fought ct eventually like we are a full he's gonna hook up with uh anisa and tanya in the hot tub on the darkroom cam holy shit chet feuded chet feuded with theo vaughn but now they've made up and he's on his podcast because he just got out of drug rehab again to him and mark long now they kind of just run the industry and they're looked at as the godfathers of the post real worlders and you see him around they're good dudes and chet and chet has long hair now awesome Awesome.

38:17Kyle Brandt:Awesome. You know, I guess we've never talked about this. The fork of the road of your career where you decided to go into sports media. But you really could have done the challenge for like 20 years. I got asked many, many, many times. You played football in college. Like, hey, you would have been one of the guys. There would have been specific things that would have been amazing for you. I always said no. And then every once in a while when I would get a little itch, like, you know, maybe like I'm 28 now. I'm like, what the hell am I doing? I'll go on down to Mexico and try to win a Wave Runner or a Saturn.

38:45Kyle Brandt:every time I'd get the itch I would see one of the promos for like this season on the challenge and holy shit it's like guys on bandanas punching each other and like triple kisses in the night vision I'm like I think I'm past that in my life man I think I'm out and I would just pass I think it was a great move next rewatchable scene Lisa meets Gary's parents here we go

39:12there's so many great parts of this scene I like when she explains what's in the party.

39:16Kyle Brandt:Do you go to Gary's school? Do I look like I'm in high school? The best. There's going to be sex, drugs, rock and roll, chip stips, chains, whips. She outs Gary for jerking off in the bathroom. Gary, you told me you were combing your hair. And then Gary's dad just basically having his memory erased. It's just a tour de force. One of the, the strangest thing is that I never have before or heard referred to it as tossing off. Is that a British term? because she's English? Is that something people say? It's a British thing. Yeah, it's a tossing off. I'm glad we're talking this, though, because we've talked about Weird Science briefly in a couple previous pods.

39:51Kyle Brandt:When I said Daniel Rudy Rudiger has masturbated more than any character in movie history ever, we started putting a crew together, and we got Joel Goodson. You immediately are like, oh, don't forget about Wyatt and Gary. They're definitely first ballot. They're in for sure. Vision Quest is in for sure. And we're taking all... Oh, I put Carl River Phoenix from Sneakers. He's in the Hall of Fame as well, the Horny Hall of Fame. first ballot

40:19now you've thrown me off now I gotta think of my people I feel like one of the guys in the Lost Boys

40:26Kyle Brandt:oh yeah those two twins the two Corys yeah just thinking about the sax guy yes for sure and I'm talking this is non-incarcerated version so like multiple MIGs doesn't count Andy Dufresne in the hole doesn't count you can't be incarcerated being in the hall that's like using PEDs But the Hall of Fame is named after Megs. I mean, I think that's only fair. The Multiple Megs. The Multiple Megs Hall of Fame. That's why they call them multiple. Yeah. Second creation attempt at the party. It's like, come on, guys. These 80s ones, these 80s teen movies always had to have the moment where popularity made our leads lose their minds.

41:04Yes. And it's like, Downey and his buddy, it's like, oh, we can be friends. And they just kind of lose it. And all of a sudden, they're trying to create a second killer of the Brock. And they fuck it up. Uh, Chet confronts everyone in the blue kitchen when he comes back. The grandparents in the closet are, are, uh, it's still funny. 40 years later, there's a lot of good stuff in this. And then the ending where they say goodbye to the girls, general public's tenderness kicks in. Yep. And Chet turns into a toad, uh, really satisfying ending. Then just completely ripped off by super bad.

41:36Kyle Brandt:Super bad, heavily inspired by it. We keep mentioning, see, notice how, when you're doing the most watchable scenes, most of them involve Chet Chet is in this movie for like three scenes he takes an hour away from the movie right in the middle of it and it's not even a very long movie but I think the best weird science is when he's on screen and I love LeBrock in this and I love Anthony Michael Hall this to me every time Chet's on I'm not turning away what do you have for most rewatchable Chet on the stairs trying to make drunk Gary throw up I mean the height of the party when everything's going wrong and the magic is taking over is really fun because the soundtrack's going but I think like you're absolutely right, you're absolutely right.

42:13Kyle Brandt:It's just when he, the booze hounds return. It's every line is quotable. And that's my favorite part, top of the stairs. It's the most rewatchable scene. My personal one is still Gary's dad. Fucking for a lot of personal reasons. Today's edition of the most rewatchable scene brought to you by PayPal. From now through December 8th, you can get 20 % cash back. When you're paying for it, PayPal, no fees, no interest. Save the offer in the app now. So whether it's the must-have toy or tiered cheese board, PayPal helps you make the most of your money this holiday. Expires December 8th. See paypal.com slash promo term subject to approval.

42:48Learn more at paypal.com slash paying for PayPal Inc. NMLS 910457. We'll take a break. Come back with the rest.

42:55Kyle Brandt:Are you looking for support in your weight management journey? ZepBound Terzepatide may be able to help. ZepBound is a prescription medicine used with a reduced calorie diet and increased physical activity to help adults with obesity or some adults with overweight who also have weight-related medical problems to lose excess body weight and keep the weight off. ZepBound is approved as a 2.5, 5, 7.5, 10, 12.5, or 15 milligram injection. ZepBound contains terzepatide and should not be used with other terzepatide-containing products or any GLP-1 receptor agonist medicines. It is not known if ZepBound is safe and effective for use in children.

43:35Don't share needles or pens or reuse needles. Don't take if allergic to it, or if you or someone in your family had medullary thyroid cancer, or if you've had multiple endocrine neoplasia syndrome type 2. Tell your doctor if you get a lump or swelling in your neck. Stop ZepBound and call your doctor if you have severe stomach pain or a serious allergic reaction. Severe side effects may include inflamed pancreas or gallbladder problems. Tell your doctor if you experience vision changes before scheduled procedures with anesthesia, if you're nursing, pregnant, plan to be, or taking birth control pills.

44:06Taking ZepBound with a sulfonylurea or insulin may cause low blood sugar. Side effects include nausea, diarrhea, and vomiting, which can cause dehydration and worsen kidney problems. Talk to your doctor. Call 1-800-545-5979 or visit zepbounds.lily.com. This episode is brought to you by State Farm. Life's full of decisions, big and small. Sometimes you can make one that you really stand behind. Like the rewatchables. We felt like there was an opening in 2017 for a podcast directly devoted to movies because we had done it on the BS podcast in 2015. We did a 20th anniversary podcast about heat, and it felt like that was an idea for a bigger podcast.

44:48We stuck to our guns. State Farm gets it. Making confident choices can make all the difference. That's why with the State Farm personal price plan, you can choose the right amount of coverage to help create an affordable price for you. talk to a State Farm agent today to learn how you can choose to bundle and save with the personal price plan. Like a good neighbor, State Farm is there. Prices are based on rating plans that vary by state. Coverage options are selected by the customer. Availability, amount of discounts and savings and eligibility vary by state. All right, this will be a fun category, Kyle Brandt.

45:20What's the most 1985 thing about this movie? And there are a million choices. I'll let you go first. I have like six.

45:27Kyle Brandt:You know, I just, I'll go with the headliner we already talked about it the the computer hacking sequence when they're navigating through this labyrinth of electronic stuff and like e equals mc squared is floating around and there's atoms and then we immediately go to dave tv from david lee roth like that is everything that was going on then i don't know how to beat it yeah i would add tweak to that everything you said plus believing you could create a hot girl out of your computer in 1985 yeah is the most 1985 thing about this movie a couple other ones the title song being written and performed by oingo boingo that literally had to happen in 1985 from my heart and from my hand why don't people understand i have to tell you too about that song so elfman like not a fan he's kind of disavowed it which is really annoying he's this prolific screen i score writer for movies for years and years but like he will give interviews where he's like yeah that video was ridiculous and the best thing that happened to that song with Elfman was that it landed on an episode of Beavis and Butthead and Butthead's like, why didn't they let this guy back in Duran Duran and Beavis goes, because he sucks.

46:32Kyle Brandt:It's so awesome. Because I like that song. I remember that. I like it too. Wyatt's posters. You get a couple looks at them. There's some Depeche Mode. There's A-ha. There's Human League. It's just like we're right into the vortex of alternative music in the 84. I don't know why the Smiths weren't on there. I guess maybe he wasn't a Smith guy. Maybe Morrissey wasn't resonating. Trunkful of Playboys, we mentioned. David Lee Roth, you mentioned. This is like, there's an 18-month window where it made sense to have David Lee Roth in your movie. And then by 86, it's over. It'd be like, why is he in this?

47:11But in 85, it made sense. And then the movie closes with general public tenderness, which, you know, by 85, that was probably the last year you could have done that. but it's really nice. Okay, we rarely get to hand out this award, and especially with you here. What do you got? The Steven Seagal Shitting on Himself Award for Most Unbelievable Anecdote from the actual film shoot. So I just got this right from the internet. What do you got? In an interview with Howard Stern, Robert Downey Jr. cleared up the rumors that he defecated in Kelly LeBrock's trailer. This is perfect. It's right on the nose.

47:47Best one we've ever had. he said that him and his villain buddy who was played by Robert Russell they would joke about defecating in people's trailers throughout the shoot he admitted they eventually did it in one female cast member's trailer but it was not Kelly LeBrock John Hughes questioned everyone in the cast who did it and when he got to Downey he replied no but I sure wish it was me who did it but he admitted he did it but they didn't say who the cast member was this is an actual story that's on the internet

48:18Kyle Brandt:not the best ding the best cigar we've handed out that's by far i mean if downey's not careful it'd be a robert downey shit and kelly lebrock's trainer award for a most unbelievable that's right so he's like oh yeah we definitely took a dump in someone's trailer it just wasn't lisa's what shit man yeah it was one of the other female cast members but he had he had the just over and over he's just like yeah i was pretty fucked up back then he's doing a lot of bad things imagine that cast member getting back to a trailer after a hard day shooting it's a tough one it didn't specify was it in the toilet was it on the floor like what was it i would think you'd do it on the floor other than what's the point if you're trying to prank him you just do it on the floor you shit on my trailer man shit on my trailer

49:05what's age the best you mentioned this movie was filmed at the same high school as the breakfast club and was actually called shirmer high school yeah um which goes back to your john hughes

49:15Kyle Brandt:universe what else do you have for what's age the best i mean just downy in general like it's if you're an iron man guy you got to watch this movie it's so surreal to see him he's so young um he did this at the time it's like it's so interesting at the time he is he's dating sarah jessica parker who had just done footloose and who's doing girls just want to have fun then he did SNL he's doing back to school and like five years later he's getting an Oscar nomination for playing Charlie Chaplin this dickhead in this movie and LeBrock has said like she's like I get asked all the time like what was it like having Robert Downey Jr.

49:48Kyle Brandt:on set and she's like whatever he was just some guy I didn't even think about him at all but it's so fun to watch him in this I had that in What's Age the Best too just like this specific mid-80s Robert Downey because the back to school and this character are very similar yeah even like from a hairstyle standpoint point SNL he kind of had the same vibe um and it was like who what is this guy what's going on here do you think he pops in this movie would you watch this and like oh that guy's got something I'm not sure it's hard to watch it neutrally I don't think so back to school I think's probably a little bit better I don't think he really popped until uh until less than zero you can tell in certain flashes like when the when they do the IC and their girlfriends break up with him and the girlfriends are talking in the background he's going like he's like dancing like that and then And you can tell he's got talent and timing.

50:36Kyle Brandt:But he's just a dickhead in an 80s high school movie. There's nothing to see from it. I thought the special effects aged pretty well from a 1985 standpoint. Yeah. Like the stuff going up the chimney. That's nuts. The party scene, the living room, the stuff moving around. It's pretty good. It's like poltergeist. Yes. My parents are away for the week as a 1980s teen movie trope has aged the best. I got it. It's so fun. The parents are coming home. Holy shit, I'm going to get in trouble. We got to clean up and we got to get all the stuff. It's like Adventures in Babysitting, Risky Business. The whole movie is about that.

51:14Kyle Brandt:And this movie, when they're magically cleaning up everything and the parents walk in at the last second, that little end table is just sliding into place. It has you on the edge of your seat. It's always good. My parents are going to find out we had a party and I got to clean up. I love it. Well, what's funny is this also goes on what's age the worst because now you would have ring cameras and security stuff. And if I went away with my wife for a couple of days, I would just be constantly looking at our outdoor, making sure nobody's coming in and texting my son and checking him out on Life 360.

51:47Like, you're not throwing a party at my house when I'm not here. Sorry.

51:50Kyle Brandt:Dude, you're all over it. We just had Halloween. We had five or six kids who I know ding dong ditch us. I'd see him a few days later. I'd be like, hey, Devin, look at you. I got you on my camera, little shit. Look at you. And he'd be like, oh, no. We just busted them all. You can't do any of it. Sorry, Mr. Brandt. What's age the best? Wyatt's grandparents just being frozen in the closet. It's so fucking funny. I don't know who thought of that, but congratulations to that person. Do you think they're having a good time now? Catatonic in a closet. Every time I laugh. A couple more. They made a TV series in the mid-90s with Vanessa Angel as Lisa during her Apex Mountain when she was in Dumb and Dumber and then the weird science TV show.

52:33I never watched it. I don't know if you were focused on it at all.

52:36Kyle Brandt:Not only did I never see an episode, I don't know anyone who's ever seen an episode, but Bill, apparently it was a very successful show. It went on for years. 88 episodes. Good for them. I couldn't tell you what channel it was on. What channel was it on? I think it was on USA, I think. But I'm not totally sure because I never watched it. LeBrock's speech, I guess Lisa's speech at the end, when she's mad, they try to create a second woman, and she's like, you had to be big shots. didn't you? You had to show off. When are you going to learn that people like you for who you are, not for what you can give them?

53:10Pretty good life lesson. Don't be a big shot. Be who you are.

53:16Kyle Brandt:I think at that point, Gary and Wyatt are like, all right, enough of this fucking shit. Right. I love this lady. I'll let me get it. Get her out of here. Yeah. Two more. The piano lady was played by Kim Malin. Kim with a Y. Talk about it. May 1982, Playboy Playmate. Her three best IMDb credits. Weird Science, Girl Playing Piano. Great. Die Hard, Hostage. Roadhouse, Party Girl. Unbelievable. And Die Hard, Hostage. It's a borderline new category. The Kim Malin, your best three IMDb category, just with no context. Weird Science, Die Hard, Roadhouse. I can't beat it. I want you to reference it in future pods.

54:04Kyle Brandt:Be like the classic Kim Malin run of the 80s. Let's talk about the run. Triple crown. This is like Hanks in the 90s. It's a triple crown. And by the way, she's not only the hostage in Die Hard, she's the hostage that Hans Gruber's goon find having sex back in the office. And she is top less in Die Hard. Oh, you're right. She is in the Rewind the Scene Hall of Fame. You're like, oh my God, Die Hard has boobs? Let me rewind it again. That's her. And she filed that up with Roadhouse. roadhouse can you i mean jesus can you imagine because when you're like a young actor in hollywood like it's just a series of calls home to your parents hopefully and like how's it going how's it going and she's like yeah i got a role in this john hughes movie yeah oh like molly ringwald kind of i play piano and then the wind blows my clothes off great honey great job so john kazello is the best five movie imdb run what's that he would godfather godfather 2 Dog Day Afternoon, The Conversation, Deer Hunter.

55:01There's only five IMDb credits. So that's the Cazale is the five. Maybe Kim Malins. Just a random three, your triple crown for your three random. I think it also has to be where none of your characters can have a name. Girl playing piano, hostage, and party girl. There's no like her name is Donna.

55:23Kyle Brandt:No, they can't even call her Sue. And everyone always be like, wow, in 94, Jim Carrey did Dumb and Dumber, The Mask, and Ace Ventura. Yeah, well, have you seen Kim Malin's run when she played hostage piano girl and bar actor? Yeah, Jim Carrey disqualified. His characters had names. Get him out. And then the last one I have for you is the Anthony Michael Hall stun double take. I just want to commemorate it as a wood stage of best. Nobody else has done it. He's good at that. And he really, he sells it and he holds it for like three, four, five seconds. He'll just make a run at it. Okay. Big Kahuna Burger Award, best use of food and drink.

56:00It's probably the icy, right?

56:02Kyle Brandt:Definitely the icy. And I like that after he pours it on him, he drops the cup on his ass too. Yeah. The cup is just the, yeah, that's the touchdown spike. Great shot Gordor Award for most cinematic shot. Would you go with the shower combo when they're talking about the girls are getting ready and Hughes does the close-ups of the two of them back and forth. I like how he does that. He's showing off there, but to the life of me, I can't understand how they got Kim Malin to launch out of the chimney and come all the way down into the pond that she lands in or something, and then she's sideways while her clothes are being blown off.

56:36Kyle Brandt:That was like some tenant shit. I don't know what they were doing. Christopher Nolan. Yeah, was that like 14-year-old Chris Nolan shooting that? I don't know what I was watching. That's that for me. Kid Cudi, Pursuit of Happiness, where best needle drop Tenderness, General Public The first few beats of it are great It's a perfect movie song You're gonna go with that over the Oingo Boingo Well, I have another category for Oingo Boingo Chess Rockwell, Brock Landers, where best character name Chet Just a big brother named Chet, who's a fucking asshole There's not a lot of Chets There's a Chet Hanks Chet Holmgren brought it back Chet Holmgren but is there like a nice conscientious down to earth character ever named Chet?

57:20Kyle Brandt:Like, you know what you're getting with the chat. It's perfect. I gotta be honest. The, the Chad, Chet, Chaz universe is pretty grim. I think, I think cousin Trent wants in on that too. If it's a Chad, Chaz, Chad, Chaz, Chet, I'm just going to probably assume I'm not going to like you. You almost have to prove to me that I'm going to like you. Yeah. And listen, if you got words about this Chet Reddit, Chet it, you can come and tell us whatever you want, Chet it. Like when Chet hangs, Chet Hanks was having all his issues. It was perfect. Like, of course, his name's Chet, but Chet Holmgren brought it back.

58:01So now Chets are kind of the, maybe the sexiest they've been in a while from a, from like an it's okay standpoint.

58:07Kyle Brandt:Father's name's Tom. He's like America's dad. Brother's name's Colin. He seems like a normal guy. chet a little different craig can you come in the zoom for a second chet orlbeck chet chet chaz chad what are your immediate reactions the worst guy in the frat yeah yeah it's brutal i don't know how you power rate them if you had to name your child one of those three which one would you pick yeah like craig might have kids soon like those three names are off the table i'm guessing yeah i think so i i think i think you can get away with chad the best chet and chaz are really hard even chad powers they named them chad powers partly because it's a douche it's a douche name yeah yeah those three are really tough just go with charlie chuck maybe even works a little better although chuck's kind of like you know your one relative or you're not sure if he's going to come to thanksgiving or not because he's had some issues there's a there's a really old uh andy samberg stand-up bit where if you go to the country of chad it's just like a white asshole sitting there being like what's up man you want to snapple i'm gonna put the playstation going named chad isn't there a whole pete davidson thing as well isn't his character named chad i don't know that whole bit with pete davidson snl yeah he's like that brain dead guy i think his name is also chad is tough i feel bad for the good chads out there i'm sure there exist chad johnson ocho cinco there's plenty yeah chad johnson works i guess it maybe it works if you're like a receiver or safety you can maybe get away with it chad um well the butch's girlfriend award for weak link of the film this could go a lot of ways what do you have yes we're gonna get real this is gonna be the here we go motherfucking port of the podcast i just gotta shoot straight here all right so you got these super horny kids and they make a super hot woman and there's no fucking action here what are we doing we made a hot big sister we are the gary would have been all over that in 30 seconds instead it's like some sort of like obi-wan kenobi adjacent sex robot who's going to teach me to be a better person and believe in myself.

1:00:21Kyle Brandt:That's a wonderful message, but wildly unrealistic for a 15 year old boy in 1985. I know that there's higher things that calling here, but Jesus Christ, it's what are we doing? They don't get anything from Lisa. That's the whole reason they built her. Meanwhile, she's kissing on Wyatt and she's shopping for sexy underpants to turn them on. So, so what is she exactly? It pisses me off. I had the exact same week link. Get into it. These kids weren't nearly horny enough. what are they doing? I just think the real life version of this movie they create this person and then it's just like okay are we going to switch she's here to have sex with us I've never had sex before rock paper scissors who's first let's go and then it's like you get a half hour you're not leaving the house parents aren't coming home you have this basically sex robot you've created you're going to have sex with the robot.

1:01:19You're not going to be like, yeah, let's go out and get some dinner. If you've been to Friendly's, they have fribbles. Patty melts are really good there.

1:01:27Kyle Brandt:Let's watch a movie for a while first. No, no, no. They're leaving the house. They're not leaving the room. And I respect that Lisa is an enlightened, intelligent character. That's why this is a movie. Of course. You can't have a movie where they just do that. But at the same time, hold on. While we're giving Lisa so much credit for being so enlightened, what is she doing just making out with Wyatt out on his patio like Wyatt's head would be exploding if that's happening like that's I don't understand what her dynamic is with these boys she's trying really hard to turn them on with like underwear and stuff and being in the shower but she's like I'm more like an older sister to teach them to believe in themselves bullshit which is it I don't think John Hughes was thinking about a lot of this stuff in 1985.

1:02:08He was just like sex robot. It's very strange. Well, that leads us to what's aged the worst. LeBrock and Elin Mitchell Smith making out in that scene you mentioned. Yeah. He was 15 and a half. Okay. Go on. 15 and a half. It was kind of shocking when it happened. Yeah. Because it was right, you know, those standards were obviously different back then. But, wow. I looked it up. I was like, oh, is this kid like 20? It's like, no, he was born in 1969. And she's like, they're like making out.

1:02:45Kyle Brandt:They're making out for a long time. And the dynamic that if you watch it, if you really want to look for it now is like, he's very uncomfortable. And like, he doesn't know what to do. And maybe part of him wants to stop. But one of the fun things about this movie, just aside, this is not fun. but what's fun is like they don't have 25 year olds playing high school kids these are real high school age kids like they went authentic which is cool but it's very strange there it's i don't know also strange wyatt wearing her underwear for multiple minutes it's just like your panties why did somebody on the set stop that there's some uh some gay slurs in this movie we have to mention that there's some sure we mentioned the richard pryor homage scene, which I don't think they would run that one back is my guess.

1:03:35But in the 80s, whatever. I also had Naming Your Dream Girl Lisa. I just don't think people are doing that now. I think it's just a better name.

1:03:46Kyle Brandt:Yeah, it's like... That was my flex, Bill, damn it. Oh, shit. I told you to give me a heads up. I had a lot of them. Instead of best character name i had worst character name and it's it's just naming your dream girl lisa with just no thought all right we'll stay on for what's age the worst and then we'll we can do your flex so we don't step on it what else did you have kyle all right well i have more to say on the kiss i you know what i was you know what i was thinking of i i mean i was gonna do an apex mountain for a hunt and comfortable kisses it's not it's not quite de niro and juliette lewis and cape fear which i feel like a crime is being committed as i'm watching it it's so horrible it's and marty's just sitting like, yeah, let's keep, let's go.

1:04:28Yeah, suck her fingers.

1:04:29Kyle Brandt:There's an infamous one in a movie called Blank Check where Duff, the VJ from MTV, like, is kissing this little boy passionately that's fucked up. I guess, what can we say? I guess it was looked at differently because a lot of people saw this and said it was fine back then, but now we're like, this is weird. Well, 15-year-old Bill was like, this is the best thing I've ever seen in my life. And Bill paid. Maybe this will happen to me. Yeah, I know. Alright, Craig, what do you have for your flex? Let's just get it over with. Yeah, well, outside of naming your dream girl Lisa. What would you have named your dream girl, by the way?

1:05:02Yeah, what would it be? I don't know. I mean, I guess it was Lisa a cool name in 1985. Because there's no one's naming Liz. I left that. I gave that. Set that up. It was like a fucking alley-oop. Thanks for the rim for you. Jesus Christ. But I see her as something more than just some robot. How dare you? Yeah, good audible. Yeah, I don't know. it's like who's naming their daughter lisa in 2020 is it like hazel or something is it the simpsons ruin lisa like that's it lisa simpson you're not naming your dream girl lisa after lisa simpson i just think that's it's out i feel a little bit bad now now that you said he's 15 and a half but i'm gonna give the uh i've only used this category once and i gave it to ethan embry but it's the matt flynn 26 million dollar contract award for the actor i can't believe we thought was a lead and that's elan mitchell smith who i think drags this movie down and and if and if you could just like put Robert Downey Jr.

1:05:54just as him, the whole movie is so much better. He's tough in this movie. Am I wrong? I mean, I like this movie and we'll get into it at the end, but every time he has to deliver a line, it's kind of rough, right? You know what it's very similar to is the Wiley Wiggins dazed and confused performance as Mitch Kramer. Good call. Yeah. Where it's just, you're putting a lot on him, you know? You really are. It's, I'm trying to, who's the quarterback in 2025 where it's just like man i don't know this is a lot of offense to throw it that's like jj mccarthy right now it's like oh jesus yeah he's not ready oh no he's got these two receivers and kevin o 'connell but i don't know if he can complain a straight pass yeah as a craig as

1:06:38Kyle Brandt:someone who like spent years with this movie you just kind of tolerate him you know it's not right he's our guy just like wiley wiggins you tolerate him he was his voice is excruciating yeah he's like i'm missile i'm missile in my room and hughes casted him because he thought his voice was interesting and he's like yeah i'll do you and he's the guy who like does he he makes the rounds he comes to the the comic con type things and he'll speak he's a professor now but i know i feel bad because he's probably listening but there's like it's same thing for for mitch kramer like the the imdb usually doesn't lie right and scoreboard you see the movies after the movie and it's like well yeah i think the imdb speaks for it yeah it's it's just a heavy load to carry as a lead at this age it's like it's rare to find anthony michael halls you know it's tough it's a tough casting move um downey would have been the move downey i think would have been good and i think he could have played a nerd because i don't i don't think he gave off super cool guy jock vibes like not that i guess he was a jock but i think you could have realistically put him in that and that Wyatt spot, and it would have played.

1:07:43Wow, this movie has a completely different shelf life if it's Downey and Michael Hall as the two stars. After Iron Man, this movie vaults into some different stratosphere.

1:07:54Kyle Brandt:And those two are like lifelong friends. Michael Hall's the godfather of Downey's kid. Like, that would have been fantastic. I mean, they reunited in stupid-ass Johnny Be Good again, which we're talking about, but that's a great call. Can I, Bill, I want to give one more what's the age of the worst, because this is pretty important. when we did the the wayne's world pod we talked a lot about wayne's world 2 and we're like it's very very dependent on knowing oliver stone's the doors movie that's pretty fucking weird if you watch this movie and are not familiar with the road warrior which is like the sequel to mad max it's a great point what the fucking hell is going on here with these guys on the motorcycles i am lost it's very strange i was one of those people who was lost okay yeah craig When you're watching these guys come in and it's, it's, it's pulled right from this movie that had just come out, same actor, same makeup, same everything.

1:08:47Kyle Brandt:They're like doing an homage to it. What are you thinking? That everybody in the eighties could just get away with whatever they want. And that, I mean, I saw, there was like a job of the hut 20 minutes later. So I was like, you know, they're just, John Hughes is doing whatever he wants. And he thought of this overnight. Yeah. This is the lesson I've tried to teach Craig over and over again. Is that just cocaine in the eighties, like all bets are off. Well, and that movies back then could be more niche. Like this movie is made for only boys between the age of 14 and 16. And people who saw that movie nowadays, they would never do that.

1:09:19I mean, they don't even make SNL sketches about movies anymore because there's no monoculture anymore.

1:09:23Kyle Brandt:So it's one thing if Hughes wants to make an homage to The Road Warrior. I get it. A little tip of the cap. This is a nine minute sequence. It's the climax. It comprises 10 % of the whole movie. It's an incredible investment in The Road Warrior. It's a good time to make popcorn too. Jesus. And it's our guy, Vernon Wells from Commando. It's awesome. All right. Thanks, Craig. We'll take one more break and then we'll come back with a hottest take. This summer, FanDuel is the best place to bet on goals. Including equalizers, balls, headers. Every goal is worth more on FanDuel. So let there be goals.

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1:10:30They optimize for the numbers that look great. Impressions, reach, reacts. But when they don't show revenue. Well, that's not such a great conversation with the CFO. LinkedIn has a word for that. Bull spend. Instead, why not invest in what looks good to your CFO? LinkedIn ads generates the highest ROAS of all major ad networks. Reach the right buyers with LinkedIn ads. You can target by company industry, job title, and more. So cut the bull spend. Advertise on LinkedIn, the network that works for you. Spend$250 in your first campaign on LinkedIn ads. Get a$250 credit. For the next one, just go to linkedin.com slash rewatchables.

1:11:11Terms and conditions apply. All right, come back, Kyle. What is your flex category?

1:11:18Kyle Brandt:Shit, you know what? My flex category was going to be about the Jamie Lee Curtis Unnecessary Nudity Award for Kim Malin. We already talked about Kim Malin and the run that she went on. I also was going to go, if this would be a porn title. And I was going to make it a gay porn called Queerd Science in which Wyatt and Gary make a guy and they just get after it. And it's Queerd Science. It works. So that's fine. How would you spell the Queerd? Q-U-E-I-R-D Yeah. Science. And I think it might exist. I didn't even look. I didn't look. I'd vote not looking. That sounds like a possible virus. the CR thinks Luke Wilson could have been Harrison Ford hottest take award.

1:12:03Um, I think you can make a case. This is the best eighties movie theme song that actually has the title in the song.

1:12:13Kyle Brandt:Oh, I love this for the purposes of the song. So I, I can't, I had six and all of them have a case and weird science is one of them. St. Elmo's fire. Yeah. John, I can feel the fire burning. That's a great one. But it doesn't really work the plot into it. So just keep that in mind. Footloose. That's got to be the goat, right? That's tough to beat. Well, I'm going to try to make the case for Weird Science. I'll help you. But Footloose. Everybody's got Footloose. It ties into the plot. It's a good one. It's a good candidate. Purple Rain. So Purple Rain is like intimately into the end of the movie.

1:12:58Yes. Right? It was a great list. But I don't really know what the Purple Rain was compared to what I just watched in the movie. It's basically just like he came up with this awesome song that Wendy and Lisa wrote for him. And then he's like, Purple Rain. But it didn't really advance the plot. It's just basically him kicking ass with the song. Ghostbusters. Ray Parker Jr. Now that does work. That does work the plot into it. Who are you going to call? Ghostbusters. I just don't think it's a good song. And then the last one is, we're going Stealth, Against All Odds. Oh. Which is, CR and I have circled it a couple times for the rewatchables.

1:13:38I think we might be the only ones that like it. But it's got Phil Collins, and it's got Jeff Bridges, and Rachel Ward, and They're in Love, and it's Against the Odds. So those would be my six. So basically in the finals, I'd have Footloose against Weird Science.

1:13:52Kyle Brandt:This is so great. I love that you and CR are circling against all odds. Was there not a song called Proof of Life in that movie? They didn't do one? No, they should have. Sit right there. The killers could have done it. Listen, I'm trying to think, like, the Purple Rain, the legacy for me is just Prince playing that at the Super Bowl halftime in Miami and it's raining. Like, I think of it more than the movie. Ray Parker Jr. is a full phenomenon. Like, that song's huge. It's pretty good. I did consider it. So here's my case for Weird Science. And Hughes clearly told Oingo Boingo, I'm making this movie.

1:14:30It's about these 15-year-old kids that create basically the perfect woman, and she comes out of the computer and has sex with them. It's called Weird Science. Can you work some Frankenstein stuff? Can you have somebody say, it's alive! Can you really... I'll show you. I'll screen the movie for you, and then you guys can write it. It just has that vibe. So I think I would still pick it number one. footloose i feel like loggins just made footloose i don't know if they went to him and said yo here's the idea it's these kids dancing they're not allowed to you're saying it was specifically

1:15:04Kyle Brandt:curated just for this movie and the concept as opposed to just being a catchy thing i feel like loggins did footloose he wrote the song and then they're like good song we should name the movie footloose like it was almost like they had the song and then the title came after this is clearly weird science can you write this plus logins was just banging out so many hits for different movies at the time right spread the wealth around a little bit i uh i think um i think that is a really really good take you know the biggest loser in it is though thomas dolby who two years later did she blinded me with science he was like god damn it i had the science song right she was right there he had to have been furious what's your uh hottest take my hottest take um Lisa sucks that's my take and I'll tell you why right out of the fucking gates she takes them to this terrible bar where they're totally uncomfortable at stands by while Gary's coerced into drinking then lets Wyatt drink and drive home she's constantly teasing them sexually including buying underwear just to turn them on they don't want that fucking party Wyatt says that a hundred times I don't want this party they're not my friends she's like no you're gonna have a party she pulls a gun on Gary's dad which Gary is really pissed off about then she makes Gary's dad permanently forget that his son exists and then at the end of it she's just like I gotta go I have to leave why why the fuck do you have to leave and she just walks away and you left out she puts the grandparents in the closet these poor people just wanted to see their grandson you're exactly right and those girlfriends she got him they're gone the next fucking day they're not sticking around and she turned Chad into a toad yes so i i think lisa like is she that great like what exactly does she do for them because there's a lot of shit that she does wrong and lisa sucks i don't care yeah there should have been that's a pretty good one by the way i guess the counter would be she made them better people yeah for 10 minutes and by the way awful awful preachy that they decided to try to make another girl like why can't we decide we can make you disappear too she's trying to lecture them and condescend them like they made you they can make another one i like her it's pretty good casting what ifs uh initially kelly emberg a model who had been in sports illustrated was cast as lisa left after two days for creative differences uh was not able to find out anything on the internets about that she uh all i know about kelly emberg she was an si model and had a kid with rod stewart in the 80s but they didn't get married and then she sued him from palmonie those are good nuggets Yeah.

1:17:40Also auditioning for the part of Lisa and not getting it. Demi Moore. Let's go. Too young, probably at that point. She's like 20.

1:17:49Kyle Brandt:But isn't 20 good? Don't we want they're closer to Wyatt and Gary? Like, I want someone close to them that they can sleep with. Like, that's what I'm looking for here. I don't want the Mary Poppins. That's fair. Well, the other one was Robin Wright, who would go on to become the most beautiful woman in the world in Princess Bride. so she's pretty young too both of them were soap opera actresses who were like 18 19 range so yeah so it works from a closer to the age more realistic but i'm not sure that's what he's wanted robin wright's coming off santa barbara just absolutely yeah princess prize 87 i was not on santa barbara no i was on days of her life but i've been to santa you never did say that the santa barbara like three week you were a doctor you got killed no i think i was gone by the time I was in my soap phase.

1:18:36Kyle Brandt:Maybe we'll be back. The only other casting would have Anthony Michael Hall had a choice of doing National Lampoon's European Vacation or this movie and he wisely chose Weird Science. This is the right move. Yeah, I don't like European that much. Best that guy word. Is John Capulosa that guy? Not for me, but I'm deep and a nerd in this. I don't think most people know John Capulosa's name. Like for Craig, he's that guy. Yeah, I mean, he's the custodian in The Breakfast Club. He's in 16 Candles. He's in the huge movies. He wins. He wins. Yeah. I mean, it's either him or your guy. Your guy, Gary's dad.

1:19:12Kyle Brandt:Britt Leach as Gary's dad. He is a good that guy because I don't even know where I know him from. Where is he from? Was he a Terminator? No, I wish. Wasn't he in the beginning of Terminator? No, Paxton's in the beginning of Terminator. But Britt Leach, as far as I know, is not. He has a scene in Father of the Bride when George Banks crashes out, as they say at the hot dogs. He's the grocery store manager. And Brit Leach is also in the great outdoors. Just a couple of memorable roles. And he's just so good in this Brit Leach. I have a scary, bald biker guy with the ears. Sure. He's one of those guys.

1:19:46He's been a scary guy. And then the lead biker guy of whatever that road warrior gang was, was also one of the bad guys in commando. Yeah. He's very much.

1:19:56Kyle Brandt:He's like the number one guy with the chain mail. Like that's the same role. Burning Wells. Hey, Bennett. i'm gonna take the knife and you bennett you don't need the gun i twist the knife come on bennett let off some steam that was years ago we did that deon waiter's award i have gary's dad i know it's not the right choice but i love gary's dad i love gary's dad who is this gary character uh what do you have for a deon well uh well dad he's a plumber and he's into plumbing and uh and he plums right that um no i mean i have i have uh i have chet bill paxton he's only in three scenes he disappears for an hour yeah i think it's the best part i thought of chet as like being an action but you're right if he's only in three scenes three scenes you two donkey dicks couldn't get laid in a morgue like just fucking awesome awesome i say it all the time maybe gary's dad should just be a new category what would it be i don't know gary's dad i don't know why i love this character so much.

1:20:56Great. Gary's dad award. Recasting couch director of City. So I mean, Downey being the, being Wyatt is clearly the answer.

1:21:06Kyle Brandt:I nailed it. Nailed it. I'd like to test drive dumping Downey's buddy, played by Robert Russell. And like, where's Zabka? How is he not in this? Zabka just should have been in all of his movies. It's four scenes. He just has to be at a mall scene he has to be at the party like a film two scenes in the bedroom like he could have there's three days he could have just jumped in and filmed here i don't know where he was you couldn't be more right and you're in your here's why it's like the key master and the gatekeeper getting together we need william zapka bully to be bullying anthony michael hall nerd and that's what we never got it we never got it it's like how we never got sugar ray leonard versus aaron prior i wanted that for the entire 80s we gotta have it never had it half-assernit research didn't have a lot here other than um the production was kept closed because they wanted to keep the film's plot a secret for some reason but then the uh elon mitchell smith has given a couple interviews since and he said that there's a scene that bill paxton loved being around the filming and just seems like the greatest guy but in the party scene apparently he dresses up in his sunglasses and a trench coat trench coat and he's in the party scene and it's chet see but you don't realize that it's him but it's it's bill paxton because he just wanted to be around that's everybody associated with this movie is like so chet's the biggest asshole of all time they're like bill paxton is the nicest person i've ever met in my life everyone loves so and i just he you don't get him doing comedy much it's like no It's here.

1:22:45Kyle Brandt:It's true lies when he's hilarious. And then even in serious movies like Aliens, when he's just saying, you know, game over, man. Like, that's so fucking funny. So when he does, he does it great. Apex Mountain. Yeah. Anthony Michael Hall. I'm going to say yes. It is. This is like, right? This weird science breakfast club combo is right when it happened. Elon Mitchell Smith, definitely yes. Kelly LeBrock, also a yes. Woman in Red, then this. Paxton, no. Asshole older brothers in a comedy. I'm going to say yes. I think Chet's like, Chet's as good as we did. He's competing against the Home Alone older brother.

1:23:22Like, there's a couple, but I still feel like Chet's the best.

1:23:24Kyle Brandt:Buzz doesn't win because the Home Alone uncle, Frank, is worse than Buzz and he takes all his shine. But yeah, Chet is horrible. Shermer High School, probably Breakfast Club. Definitely. John Hughes. Heat check time. Heat check. He's making a movie about a guy's making a woman. And they're like, yeah, sure, do it. Whatever you want. Same year as Breakfast Club. I think it's Breakfast Club, though, which comes out after. Right? Does it come out after or before? No, Breakfast Club is February 85. This is August 85. Oh, Breakfast Club came out before. So I think it's Breakfast Club. Either way, it's Breakfast Club.

1:23:59Although some people would say it's the late 80s when he writes Home Alone. Sure. But I don't even know.

1:24:07Kyle Brandt:I've wrestled with this my whole life. Do you like Breakfast Club or Ferris better? uh breakfast club i've seen more times yeah i they're both pantheon for me but breakfast club is an all-timer for me yeah for years and years of my life i would say breakfast club is my favorite movie i don't really anymore but i think it's just by a nose over ferris i love ferris though it's one of especially as my brain's going as i've hit my uh my 50s here but it's one of the only movies i can still like quote accurately i know it's fun it's really larry lester's buns taping them together. And you know what they do in that movie?

1:24:43Kyle Brandt:It's the same thing they do here. Hughes always makes you eat your vegetables. There's always going to be some sort of sentimental scene at the end. It's not just horny high school stuff, but Andrew Clark getting high and crying about his dad. This is Gary and Wyatt being like, I want you to like me for me. That's why that's not really my car. Like Hughes will always give you a little bit of green beans on the side.

1:25:04Toads, Apex Mountain for people being turned into a toad. I'm going to say yes. So is he a toad or is he a pile of shit?

1:25:10Kyle Brandt:Like what? Yeah. What is that creature? Is he a pile of feces? Is he a frog? Is he a, I don't, I don't even know what it is. He's a feces toad that eats flies. Yes. Greasy pork sandwiches on dirty ashtray. Yes. How about this? 80s high school party scenes. I got it on my list. And I'll say it as boldly as I can. This is the one for me. This is number one high school party movie in any decade. It's just, and the reasons why I think that fucking house is amazing. why it has this huge mansion with like a lake outside and a gate uh she uses magic so like there's all this food and like the lighting's perfect there's a full bar with bartenders and scotch and stuff and like the music's cool and there's this is the party i wanted to go to when i was a little kid that's fair 80s fantasy women know unless they're created from a from a computer sure and then 80s houses coming back together right before the parents get home i still think it's risky business.

1:26:05Kyle Brandt:Definitely. Well, the auction. Unloading Guido, the killer pimp. Pulling the, carrying the egg, bringing the stuff back. So good. Great stuff. Cruz or Hanks? Cruz as Wyatt? Like early 80s Cruz? Like outsiders Cruz? I was thinking of like, of losing at Cruz. Losing at Cruz as Wyatt. And by the way, when's the losing at pod, Bill? When's that coming? Him and Shelly Long. You only have so many Cruz phones left. I think Cruz bought that out. I don't think it exists. It's like how Johnny Depp bought a private resort with him. And who's the guy, Rob Morrow. Yeah. You can't find that movie. The movie's gone.

1:26:43Kyle Brandt:You can't find soul man. You can't find losing it. And I remember I read like a rundown once the cruise did with entertainment weekly, where he gave like one take on all his movies that he did. And they're like losing it. And he's like, yeah, that really made me learn about what projects to pick. And that was like his only comment. I don't think he's proud. It's not good. And then he went and bought every copy that was left. Scorsese or Spielberg. probably spielberg the horny teenage thing would have resonated with him in some way i think spielberg for sure i just i just think like how cool was it dude that hughes and spielberg just holding down the 80s on totally different corners totally different types of movies never worked together never crossed over like the closest they got was that chris columbus was a spielberg protege and he ended up directing home alone if they could have movie swapped i would have spielberg direct weird science and i would have hughes directs uh the goonies which he produced but like the kids that they get into like that would be the perfect swap i'd like a hughes goonies it's a good idea for a category movie swap swap yes movie swap when it's a mark that went down what role would feeble philip seymour hoffman have played clearly chet how'd you like a greasy pork sandwich like he would be awesome he would have played him as like scent of a woman that that whatever his character was in that with the jacket yeah yeah all right pick and nets sure we already mentioned the boys are getting the sex out of the way as soon as she's created that's happening this movie should just been rated r yeah and what would they do with it this is one of the things we figured out 20 years later in the super bad era it's like why are we trying to make pg movies thinking kids aren't just going to go buy a ticket to another movie and then sneak into this one why aren't we building buzz why aren't we pushing the envelope we for some reason none of that stuff really clicked until about 2004 well it's a shame pg-13 brand new brand new at this point on the heels of uh gremlins european vacation rusty saw some boobs temple of doom so they're like you know we can give them a little action, we can kind of show a nude woman and say a few bad words, but we can sell more money by getting younger people in as well.

1:28:55Kyle Brandt:It's always been like that purgatory rating. You know, like the new Predator movie is out, and people are like, holy shit, it's PG-13, but it's really good still? It must be amazing if they can be that good without an R rating. It's just fascinating to me. Any other pick of nits? I mean, it's hard to pick a lot of nits with this movie because it's so ridiculous. I grew up in the Chicago suburbs. I basically grew up in Shermer in the mid-80s. The fact that these two kids are living in the north suburbs of Chicago, Illinois of 1985, and they're not having every single conversation about the 85 Bears is such bullshit.

1:29:28Kyle Brandt:It's the biggest thing in the world. Never mind Lisa. They'd be making Wilbur Marshall and Otis Wilson and playing the Super Bowl shuffle. There'd be no oingo boingo. It would be Refrigerator Perry rapping. It was everywhere. It drives me nuts that there's no 85 Bears in this. They just missed. Wow, that's great. Well, you also have the 84 Cubs, too. Yes. It would have been. And Gary's wearing a Cubs hat. You would have Leon Durham. You would have had a Jim McMahon, Walter Payton, something. then rick sutcliffe for sure is up there no wonder these guys were fucking nerds put on a water painting jersey guys he's right there he's been there for years generation sucks what are you guys doing i don't know by the way jordan showed up that year too you're right so it's jordan's on the bulls yeah throw on a jordan jersey be ahead of the curve yes jordan shows up not until home alone later in kevin mccallister's christmas decorations they finally get back to it the only other nitpicking i had is what is going on in that bathroom bathroom scene at the end like Wyatt is taking a shit while Gary's in the room?

1:30:20Kyle Brandt:That doesn't make, no one's ever done that. I don't understand. It's beyond a picking net. I don't know. These guys share a lot. They share, they sleep together every night. They're taking shits together. They're in the showers together. Can you imagine being in the same bathroom as your high school friend while he takes a dump right next to you? It would never happen. It doesn't make sense. And why did they then let the two girls in to use the bathroom and then they just get into the shower instead of leave? It makes me uncomfortable because I know it stinks in that bathroom. I hate it. So why are there two twin beds in that room?

1:30:51Kyle Brandt:Great call. I thought the same thing. Great call. It's set up for sleepovers. Who had twin beds? Yes. Yes. Well, maybe the only thing I was thinking was maybe Chet slept with Wyatt for a while before he got older. And they just never got rid of the twin beds. And at the end of the movie, Gary and Deb are in one of the twin beds together. And that's pretty tight. It is strange stuff. I had this later for Illinois, an unanswerable question about Illinois, but I'll do it here. Because we had all these different houses and movies filmed in there in the 80s. And all the houses are like really nice and huge.

1:31:26And they're in these great suburbs. You know, good school system, apparently. You can call the janitor as your janitor. But this house you mentioned earlier was like a really nice, almost like a mansion. So was the Home Alone house. So was the Risky Business house. Ferris had an awesome house. Cameron had an awesome house. Was Illinois just like the best, mid-80s Illinois, the best Redfin you could have done?

1:31:51Kyle Brandt:Yeah. It's just like, oh, man. Were these houses expensive? Did just everybody have a nice house? I didn't understand it. I think it's a really nice place to live, and there's some neighborhoods that aren't. But listen, I know where Cameron Frye's house is. We used to drive by it. It's in Lake Forest. And the crazy thing is, Bill, is that the Bears facility is up there and the Bulls practice facility. So like Michael Jordan's house is like five minutes away from where Gary and Wyatt's house is. They're all up there in the north suburbs. Great place to live, man. We should have given the Amanda Dobbins real estate category to the house.

1:32:25Because I just thought it was an awesome house. It is. Sequel, prequel, prestige, TV, all black cast are untouchable. All black cast would have been interesting. Sure. Maybe like a 1994 range all black cast. You get like Alfonso Ribeiro is one of the nerds. i don't know hallie berry's the weird science maybe it's like 92 91 range okay when there was like a black movie renaissance just happening in general maybe they're like fuck it let's make

1:32:54Kyle Brandt:black word science let's go i can flush that out for you and when they make lisa the first thing lisa does is take him to a bar of all white people listening to heavy metal right and they're listening to a country club yeah yeah and there's just like yeah here drink this martini and they They drink it, and it's all switched like that. That's the way it works. She takes him to the Shermer Country Club because it's martini night. Is this movie better with Wayne Jenkins, Danny Trejo, Mad Dog Russo, Doris Burke, Buffalo Bill, Sam Jackson, Nell, Byron Mayo, Tony Romo, Chris Collins, or Daniel Plainview, Long Legs, or Wilford Brimley in The Firm?

1:33:27What do you have?

1:33:28Kyle Brandt:All right. You're going to do it, aren't you? I got to stretch out. So our guy this week, Gus Johnson's been in the news. He's been in the conversation for his call at the NDB Indiana game. I'm Team Gus for life. And I think you start the movie with Gus. Not on going Boingo. You got Wyatt and Gary sitting there. And they're checking out the gym. And Gus comes on the call. Wyatt and Gary. Young fellas. Ha ha. Pitching tents in the gym. Watching girls gymnastics. Here comes Tony Stark. Oh. They're down at his ankles with the fruit of the loom. There we go. Wow. You actually lost audio on the Zoom because you went to...

1:34:14I went too big. I'm so high, Gus. Thank God you're recording from your end.

1:34:17Kyle Brandt:Wow. I'm at work right now, too. Sorry for everybody. They might actually think it's Gus Johnson, but it's just me. It's like, Gus Johnson's in the closet. What's going on there? What do you got? I was thinking it could be funny if Buffalo Bill was in this movie because, you know, it's middle America. Let's go. And somebody comes to see what happened to Lisa a couple days later. Sure. And she's in his basement with Precious. He's already kidnapped her. And they're like, have you seen Lisa? This really hot British lady. Is she a British lady? Is she wearing a thong and a cut-off T-shirt? I heard about that.

1:35:02I don't know. Just put them in. Bonus content for the DVD.

1:35:06Kyle Brandt:Yeah. It puts the woman on the computer like it's told her. It gets the hose again. Absolutely. Just one Oscar who gets it. Yeah, tough one. Maybe Oingo Boingo. Danny Elfman, he would not accept that. He would refuse to accept it. Danny Elfman's like, this movie never happened. Probably unanswerable questions.

1:35:30Did Gary ever have sex with Lisa? Lisa?

1:35:37Kyle Brandt:did gary no i we don't even see him kissing her nothing nothing he got drunk and passed out it was only a one night thing because the second this is all one weekend first night pass out yep second night party yep so he's out nothing and then did she have sex with wyatt no wakes up the next day and he's wearing her panties so that insinuates that something happened he said she she makes out with him and says what do you want basically and he's like girls gymnastics it's all going exactly how you would want she's like what fantasy do you want me to do and then the next morning she says i was in the middle of my gymnastics routine and you passed out you fell asleep so ostensibly like she was gonna have to have been roofied she's not to pass out yeah he's never had sex before he's not passing out he might be passing out because there's no blood in his head, but he's not falling asleep.

1:36:31Kyle Brandt:I don't think it ever happened. And I put that line into like... But again, the smoking gun for me is she is at a lingerie store buying underwear specifically that they want to look hot in. It just doesn't make sense. And the next morning, at least for an hour, Wyatt's going, what happened last night? I passed out. Did you have sex with her? What happened? What'd you do? They're just recapping every single moment of it. and Gary's just going, I can't believe I passed out. I got to... Wait, before we do anything today, I got to... Yeah, let's go take care of it. No. No, they're just going to a mall.

1:37:07What were Lisa's... I guess this is the Zawantanea Award too, but what were Lisa's next few days in Shermer as the new British gym teacher with no credentials? I don't even know if she has a driver's license. Where does she live? Did she get an apartment? Did she just magically make an apartment? Did she move into another house? What was going on there?

1:37:29Kyle Brandt:She can make all that stuff, I think, with magic. I wonder, what is her first gym class? Are we doing the pegboard? Are we climbing the rope? Are we doing the presidential fitness test? Oh, like Vision Quest style? Yeah. Are we doing what we're doing? I don't know. Kickball, but she's making the balls go in crazy directions. Yes. Is she dating? Does she want to date? Is she interested in meeting somebody? Yeah. Michael Jordan, and she's like, who's this guy in the bulls? I think that's just going to be my new boyfriend. No, I don't know. We know that she likes him very, very, very unathletic. You know that.

1:38:01Kyle Brandt:I mean, I'm talking Gary White and Seagal in both lives. Did Lisa eat and go to the bathroom? Yeah, because we see her drinking. Was she fully human? Yeah, I think we see her drinking, and I love that we're asking this. She smoked some cigarette at one point. on the Star Wars pod when we spent 10 minutes being like, so does Chewbacca take a shit? And I was like, way in. I'm like, this is why I listen. Chewbacca have an asshole? Like, what's his deal? Yeah, he's like a dog. And yes, Lisa does. And she takes shits. And she might have even peed when she's in the shower with Wyatt and Gary. Sure, let her rip.

1:38:38Okay. I want to make sure. Did you have any unanswerables? Because I'm going to move on.

1:38:43Kyle Brandt:Just quickly, is this movie like spinning clock at the end? It's so short that they just, for some reason, inexplicably put in a chase scene with police that doesn't add up to anything and they go in front of the train like it's Dukes of Hazzard for no reason. I feel like they're like, we need three more minutes to make it a movie. It just does nothing. He was just like, we got to get to 88 minutes. That's what I told the studio. Ferrari chasing. What piece of memorability would you want or not want from this movie? I just want to point out the jacket worn by Kelly LeBrock in this film was sold to a pawn shop in beverly hills for 25 000 a couple of years jacket the sleeveless one yeah yeah uh i would get that if i would give it to my wife but she's not wearing that i would think of another family member though my souvenir bill will be uh why it's incredible full-ass treasure chest of playboys and oh and with the trunk itself with the trunk itself yeah under the tree for my son when he's the right age on christmas have fun son go with god that'd be it so i wanted when they go up the stairs yeah in uh wyatt's house a couple times there's a family portrait of wyatt and his family and then later at the party they all have the hitler mustaches drawn on them and i just think having that portrait would be hilarious it's awesome it'd be people always say they want that the tony soprano portrait when he's with paio my with like oh yeah oh yeah like paulie takes no you're like no this is wyatt's family from the home alone the real or the from weird science the real family it's great well there was the dirk doug diggler portrait yes was available a couple times and i i went on the auction site because i was i was like hey if this isn't and it went for like some crazy price like five crazy like six figures it's the worst painting of all time too it's horrible it has jessest james in the bottom right as like she actually painted it and uh i wanted it for the studio but it just didn't work out um the coach finstock or best life lesson we could deal with shame death is a much bigger issue it's a heavy line yeah just put that in your high school yearbook ready to go what's your double feature uh mannequin i'm doing andrew mccarthy and kim cattrall nothing's gonna stop us now a magical woman comes out of nowhere you got hollywood you got the guy from police academy and bill if the painting is too expensive for the studio you should see if they have those those dd drapes that they close that are embroidered with dirk digler that's probably way cheaper i'll look at that i'll search for that later my double feature is breakfast club for the same reason my who won the movie pick is anthony michael hall ah i think i i just think it's an anthony michael hall double feature we're like this guy should have like this guy should have at least been how we talk about jonah hill now yeah as popping in all these different awesome movies and just having a bigger run.

1:41:39And he became a really good character actor later in his career. He did. But I just felt like it's just too bad, but this is the 80s. Like, weird shit happened, and I know he had some issues, but it's too bad.

1:41:51Kyle Brandt:He really carries Eland Mitchell Smith in this movie, too. I feel like he's Jamar Chase, and Mitchell Smith is like Jake Browning. He's just carrying. Give me the ball, dude. Just give me the ball any way possible. who do you have for who on the movie i had lebrock written down like i think i think anthony michael has been great in other stuff she's just sensational if if she doesn't work the movie's terrible and i think it's really cool that she didn't do a movie for another five years she just seems like a cool lady she refers to hard to kill that movie if you ask her what she refers to it as hard to watch like she's self-deprecating she's cool i think for her not hard to watch for us hell no every time i watch it tonight all right craig you've you've intentionally held off your take i can't wait what do you got man we throw this movie in the vault with with the movies that need to be studied and revisited every decade i think it's in the running i think it's in the running for the most 80s movie ever obviously you guys could make that call better than me but man the clothing the hair just prime 80s the cheesy effects the like close-up facial reactions like when they see Kelly LeBrock for the first time, they do like the head wiggle with the sound effect, which is so 80s.

1:43:05There's like a 10-minute offensive scene. You got a mall scene, Road Warrior, Oingo Boingo, Anthony Michael Hall himself.

1:43:12Kyle Brandt:Yeah. I will say, when I went into this movie, I didn't know it was, I intentionally don't, I don't watch trailers. I don't look up anything about the movie. I just watch it. I, so I didn't know it was PG-13, assumed it was R. I was kind of expecting Kelly LeBrock naked in like the first 10 minutes. Yeah. Yeah. Like the shower scene, I was like, here we go. And then they cut off at the legs. So I was slightly disappointed there. And it kind of like changed my calculus of what the movie was because it's John Hughes. But I thought LeBrock crushed it. I thought her accent also worked. I think this movie is like, I don't know, five of the most inexplicable scenes of the 80s.

1:43:48Yeah. Like Anthony, Michael Hall talking like Richard Pryor. Yeah. Everything is completely insane, but also very wholesome. Like they don't know what to do with Lisa, but stare at her. I don't know why the one quibble I have why did they make her as smart as Einstein? Why would you want to do that? You wouldn't, Craig. No! I know that sounds bad but you're 15 years old you don't want her to be that smart. Why Einstein? Smartest person in the world? It makes no sense. I think they were really ad-libbing a lot of that when they were making The Perfect Woman. I think they probably would have done some do-overs that did it again.

1:44:26This movie's insane. this movie is just out of control 80s everything about it it's so goofy to me but i have to remind myself that like the scarcity of male fantasy content that was available but craig you must

1:44:36Kyle Brandt:have been like holy shit when i'm through all but five minutes of this movie and i think i've seen it all and then when chet turns into the piece of shit frog what that right the movie was like normal kooky 80s until the road warrior people showed up and then chet turned into job of the hut yeah all right i officially don't know what the fuck's going on i don't think he used it either because he's they're just trying to he's trying to finish it as fast as possible because this was how he was allowed to make the breakfast club if he also did it so he's just trying to get through this because he wants to make pretty and pink yeah well i don't know why wasn't lebrock a bigger star what happened there she ran away she met she met our guy seagal i can't believe she's with seagal i don't know if that makes me think better of seagal or worse of lebrock craig if we could rewind this pod the part where you had a natural reaction to kelly lebrock being married to Steven Seagal was my favorite moment.

1:45:24Kyle Brandt:Unbelievable. You were shocked, bro. I'm in shock. Kyle, you being like, she's so cool. She's so self-aware. I'm like, how is she so self-aware? I don't know. Married to him a long time. I don't know. They even survived when he had the no intimacy coordinator scene. What was that? Above the law? That was hard to kill. Hard to kill. Yeah. No, it wasn't hard to kill. Hard to kill is the one she's in with LeBrock. Yeah. Yeah, but that was the other Steven Seagal movie when his wife gets shot to death. Right. Was that the same movie? I think so. Before his wife is shot to death, he takes liberties with his wife's upper body that I've not seen in movies.

1:46:03Kyle Brandt:That's right. Yeah. You're not supposed to do that. It's the same movie. I forgot. Same movie as in with his wife. Come on. Yeah. And that's how he went into the coma. Unbelievable. Can you imagine the red carpet premiere with that? Nope. She's like, I didn't realize you went like this crazy. Anyway. All right. so Craig you enjoyed it yeah of course like it's 88 minutes it's remarkable how many memorable moments there are in 90 minutes yeah like so many things happen there are so many scenes that just will stick in your brain forever it's an insane movie I can't the 80s are just fucking crazy I heard yeah you really missed your calling Craig feeding images and input into a computer to make the perfect specimen Bill is it true that that's how Robert Kraft made Drake May I heard that that's that's the rumor going around the NFL a little bit of Josh Allen a little bit of yeah Yeah.

1:46:49We love, Drake May is a hero in New England right now. You better believe it. He's even has his, his wife is doing cooking stuff. Do you see all the Pats fans? Oh, yeah. They call her the first lady. It's just great. It worked out awesome. I think, I'm really happy for you. I think it's,

1:47:05Kyle Brandt:Mr. Kraft is there with the supercomputer. He's got pictures of Brady and Drew Bledsoe and Doug Flutie and a little Brian Hoyer's brain. And like, he just puts them all in and it came out Drake May. It's a beautiful thing. Jason Tatum, he threw in there just for the hell of it. and they picked a good name, Drake May. They didn't pick Lisa. Yeah. All right. Thanks to Kyle Brandt. A pleasure as always. Thanks for pushing to do this. Thanks to Craig Horvath. Thanks to Gahal. We'll be back next week with probably not one from the 80s next week. We'll try to get a little more modern, but good to see you guys.

1:47:36Thanks.

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