Hour 3: AJ Brown Expectation Level, NBA Finals Preview, plus Comedian Patton Oswalt In-Studio

22:24And there's nothing worse than being the funniest person in your circle. Sure. Because you just don't grow. So I always had people around me, Andy Kindler, that were just so quick and funny. Todd Glass. Todd Glass, who's a force of nature. So always having those kind of people around me made me so much funnier.

22:43Rich Eisen:And getting ready for your interview, because I'm a lead pipe building professional, Patton, is I was going down some memory lane. Were you going through the microfiche files? again i like that you sent someone to sit down to the clip files no but i i saw you on seinfeld um where you were you were working the video store when george is coming up trying to get breakfast at tiffany's he's trying to rent it and it's not there and you walked away from the computer screen yep and he tried to sneak the what the address of where it was he wanted to go to the person's house to watch it because they had rented it by the way isn't it weird that anyone what we're talking about now is hey i watch you on this old sitcom and there's a generation like a sick a what and then it's like and in the scene you're working in a video store a what where are you working i know so yeah it was um uh it's a scene where uh jason alexander doesn't want to read the book for his book club wants to rent the movie the movie's rented out and he's bothering me to go tell me who rented the thing out see and then he he sneaks their address and then goes to their house and tries to talk his way into their apartment and watch breakfast at tiffany's with this family it's the weirdest it's so it's again that show was amazing and so this was around the time where you were doing this stand-up that we're referring to yeah this was in 94 i was kind of doing little rooms like the largo and the diamond club and the m bar and I just was starting to get seen by people because that was the new kind of scene bubbling up.

24:14But that ought to be huge for you to be on a show Jerry Seinfeld is putting on the air. Jerry Seinfeld and Larry David and I'm in a scene with Jason Alexander. Yeah. And this is 1994 when being on a sitcom, like you didn't have 9 ,000 entertainment options and it was like the sixth season of Seinfeld. People were watching it. Like it was, oh, we saw you last night. Like the next day, I saw you last night. Yeah, I was on TV. Right. I remember, by the way, did you ever work retail when you were young? Absolutely, of course. Okay. I got the job on Seinfeld because of my retail experience. What do you mean?

24:51Well, when I was doing the audition and Sir Larry David is playing the George character and he's bugging me like, hey, is there someone? Can you tell me the address so I can do it? And I didn't realize I did this. He goes, you, he told me later, he goes, you unconsciously did this, looked around, like, what other employee can I give this guy to? Which is what you do in retail when there's someone bad at the counter. You're like, yeah, sir, let me, you know who can help you with that? You know, because you don't want to. And I, I didn't even realize I did it. It wasn't an acting choice. It was my, it was my panic instinct from my years in retail of get rid of this guy and hand him to someone else.

25:30and it made them both laugh in the room

25:32Rich Eisen:and that's how I got the job. Is that somebody who was looking for a pair of pants that you didn't have them? And they were like, you know, let me go to the house and ask for the pants back. Same exact thing, huh? Pretty much. Oh my God, yeah. That is kind of what he's, oh, they already sold it. Let me go to their house, give me their address and I will convince them to give me the pants. What a wild scenario. Yeah, yeah, yeah. To actually do that. And I imagine that's the first time you meet Larry David. Is that, and you stayed in touch or? We didn't really stay in touch. I mean, we all, you know, he was this legendary stand-up that the other comedians, when he was doing stand-up, he was legendary for not only having awful sets, but he would have the kind of awful sets where when he went on stage, every other comedian ran into the room to see, like, what is he going to do?

26:20He's going to do something so, he's going to torpedo this in such an epic way that it'll be talked about. So every comedian, like, worshipped him. And so we were aware of each other. And then I guess over the years, and also, you know, I still am friends with Jeff Garland and a lot of the people that work on the Larry David show. So they brought me in to do an episode of that, which was really, really fun. Where you played his CPA. Yes, CPA, and I'm trying to, I have lied my way, in a very George Costanza-like way, I have lied my way into the good graces of a very beautiful woman who thinks that I'm a competitive eater.

27:06And I convinced her that I'm in a hot dog eating contest, and she really wants to see me in the hot dog eating contest. and so i somehow through again through a series of horrible mistakes i pull larry into the contest now he has to do it and the last shot is us shoving hot dogs into our face if i had told that

27:28Rich Eisen:that kid on seinfeld yeah one day you're going to be jamming hot dogs down your gullet next to larry david you only have you only have a line this time but you just wait 24 years that's right You will be sitting next to the creator of this show, shoving hot dogs into your mouth. Multiple takes. My favorite scenes from Curb back in the day were Larry behind his desk. Somebody comes into his office and they have a conversation. And I'm always wondering what's real and what's on the page and what isn't. You know, you had one of them in a very classic scene. Yes. I mean, it was he again, you have the basic outline of the scene.

28:07and then he what's so amazing about larry david is because a lot of times when people are doing improv yes they're trying to win the scene with the funniest line and he is if anything setting you up to be even funnier and in doing so he ends up being even because what he's saying is like so you got her to she bought the because i he gives me this really stupid story to say that i'm a competitive eater and she buys the story she goes she bought that lie that was the stupidest thing i'm like i know like that was like a that's like a gerbils level lie no no i go i go who was the guy who said the bigger the lie the more people believe it he goes gerbils i go well you gave me a gerbils level lie and he goes well gerbils is the goat of lying like i got a girl like he's so it's it isn't even in his head that he's talking about a nazi just like i'm really good at lie like Like, and he's so, and that becomes the funniest thing in the scene.

29:02He's so delighted with himself. And you're like, you don't, you realize you're talking about a Nazi. Like, and he always does that in these scenes. Like, he will set up the other people. And he brings in really, I mean, Richard Kind and Vince Vaughn. Yeah. And these just amazing improvisers. And he is just so good at, at a lot of him, because he also understands it's the straight guy that always, it's the guy that's incredulous. It's like, what are you talking about? J.B. Smoove. I mean, half the times, half those scenes with J.B. Smoove, it's just Larry cannot believe what's coming out of J.B.

29:36Smoove. He's like, wait, what? And it's so hilarious. I also love the scenes when he's out in public and he's having what should be the most inconsequential exchange with a person. And you can see him. He can't help but make it worse. and and i just feel like that's happened a lot in his life where he's like just take your number and go get your food and he has to then is it necessary like and then he can't and then he causes a huge and i just feel like that has happened so much in his life and the fact that he has the wherewithal to step back and go actually this is comedic even though i'm burning my life to

30:16Rich Eisen:the ground i love it i can't get enough if i got pat noswalt here on the rich eisen show tea and Scotch is available now on the Gorilla Plus channel and the 800-pound Gorilla YouTube channel is coming up on June 9th. Check out his comedy special, their 10th comedy special. Congratulations on that. Thank you. Dink is a movie I've been hearing about. This is a Ben Stiller pickleball vehicle. Ben Stiller pickleball vehicle. That is coming out on July 24th on Apple TV. And I cannot wait for that so this is a pickleball movie pickleball movie um with um oh my god why am i blanking on his name jace jake johnson jake johnson stiller so far steenburgen steenburgen she was here talking about that oh she was talking about that movie was talking a little bit i mean when she was here with with ted danson yes um i'm dropping names now um but uh but yeah we i'm looking forward to this because is this uh for the lack of better phrase like a little bit of dodgeball being brought to it's a little bit it is a it is very much they the director um josh um greenbaum god i'm blanking he's an amazing he did that um amazing documentary with will ferrell and um will's transgender friend okay will and um my mind this morning anyway no they went on a on a On a road trip.

31:39Yeah, right. Yeah, he's an incredible director. So he really, he does a great thing where it's that classic snobs versus the slobs. It's the tennis players at this country club versus the pickleball. And the pickleball guys are. And then he just works all these weird variations on that theme. Okay. Including he does such a great take on the classic big showdown at the end where our hero has to redeem the outcasts. and he really has fun with kind of making fun of, it's still a very satisfying ending, but also really funny, the riffs he dings off it. And the villain in the movie is Ed Harris. He's the guy, he's the head of the country club who wants, only wants tennis.

32:25Okay. And there were a couple of scenes I did with him where I'm being this, because I'm like one of the big pickleball advocates. Atta boy. and I'm uh I am I do all this dialogue at him in this one scene one take I don't know if they used it because I haven't seen the whole movie yet I've seen scenes of it where he just instead of saying his line back to me he just stares at me and an Ed Harris stare is just earth scorching like you just want to die when he's just staring at you and so he does all these great it's like Tommy Lee Jones in Men in Black, where he's just cannot believe the idiocy around him.

33:05He's so funny.

33:07Rich Eisen:Ed Harris, you do realize he's acting, though, right? When he's staring a hole through you. I mean, yes, but it's Ed Harris. You've seen that face, those eyes. Dude. You know what I mean? I love that. He is just intense. Did you play your own pickleball scenes, sir? I played my own pickleball scenes. We had pickleball warm-up scenes. But then there's a scene at the end with this big match, and they brought in these professional tennis players who the director was like, okay, I need the ball to come in, curve like it's going to go to the left, but then land on the right and goes, okay, and he would exactly hit it.

33:41It was like these aces that just, you know, they come in and they do all of the, get everything to land where they want to land. It was fascinating to watch.

33:50Rich Eisen:But people who see Dink and watch you on the screen, that's you really playing pickleball. There are scenes of me playing pickleball. There are scenes where Jake is playing against. I'm not going to say who he plays against. But there are scenes where Jake was really, really playing, as was the other guy. But then there were some very specialty shots. They brought in some ringers. Just go, we need this to hit this way. Okay. And that was like even crew members would gather around and go, is he actually going to do this? And he would. How about that? Very weird. So I'm just wondering how competitive it was on the set.

34:25Well, there were a couple of times we were warming up. where it did, even though we were trying to act like, hey, we're just playing pickleball, it did get to be a little, because pickleball isn't about prowess and power. It's all strategy and trying to. This movie is not called Smash. It's called Dink for a reason. And Dink is a devastating move you can pull on somebody. Absolutely it is.

34:49Rich Eisen:That's how you can win a point. Exactly. Listen, these guys around here don't understand pickleball. They, because they, you know why? I'll tell you why. because they want the big He-Man. You smash, and that's how you win. It is so – and that's what the movie deals with that. It deals with the Jake Johnson, the tennis player, struggling with the, wait, I can win just by – yes! Just do that! Counterintuitive. It wins the day. Listen, I know the way you feel about pickleball, Chris. I know the way you feel it. TJ, you too. It's a wiffle ball. It's a small racket. It's a little court. It's like a mini court.

35:26Rich Eisen:Sure. And thus, it's not a sport. I'm here to say... And between every point, you put on a frilly dress and sip tea. I know that that's a... But that is part of the game. That is what gets you in the mindset. If you would just let go of all that. Please. Have you yet to do it yet? No, never mind. He's afraid he's going to tear his Achilles back. I'm also not a man of a certain age. oh so just went there too wow he's in his 40s but he just went there too i'm i would save that clip yes and just keep it and keep it in the back holster in the pocket wait about five years yeah then i will be and when he's suddenly playing pickleball you're like oh that's weird because what's that thing you said yeah i'm not a man of a certain pickleball keeps certain positions in this town in business and it is not easy to do it's a full-on workout it's the real okay It is a game not of physicality, not only of physicality, but of the mind and strategy and cunning.

36:32There's a chess element to it, baby. Everybody. Dink. Ben Stiller. I am looking forward to it. Listen, what camera's on me right now? You're on it. July 14th. Think Dink.

36:50Rich Eisen:Ladies and gentlemen, by the way, I think it's July 24th. Do you want to do that again? God damn it. Ready? Here we go. Don't lose the other one. I want people to know you can still come back from adversity. Here we go. Ready? July 24th. Think Dink. There you go. There's your trailer. Yeah, you were a second serve guy. I was a second serve guy. That was a let. That was a let. There you go. Thank you. Very good. Yeah. Patton Oswalt. Tea and Scotch. Available now. Right now on Gorilla Plus. Correct? Gorilla Plus Comedy. And streaming. Very good. And streaming on 800-pound Gorilla's YouTube on June 9th.

37:28Rich Eisen:June 9th. Right around the corner. Great to see you, man. Thanks for having me in. Anytime. Yeah. Anytime. Anytime. And we'll make sure the water's the right room temperature as part of your contract. That's fantastic. Thank you very much. Ladies and gentlemen. Patton Oswalt, everybody, right here on the show. We wrap things up. Dink. Before your phone calls and more. Dink. Dink. Dink. Dink. Yay. The Rich Eisen Show. The podcast.

38:22We'll be right back. ends June 30th, terms at aka.ms slash college PC. The Stanley Cup Final on ABC is more than a quest for the cup. It's 134 years of putting it all on the line and the heaviest 35 pounds ever lifted. It's broken curses and broken hearts. But for those chasing it, it's everything. The only question is, who will take it? You just have to watch the Stanley Cup Final presented by GEICO on ABC and the ESPN app.

38:58Rich Eisen:Bing bong. Look who's here for No Contest Wrestling. It's ladies and gentlemen, O'Shea Jackson Jr. Hey. Hello, neighbors. Or should I say... Thank you. Generalissimo. You see him? Boy, that boy, Regal. That's required. By the way, very nice. Your neck's not that far away from your shoulder. I wasn't there to pose. I wasn't there to pose. Look at this. It's a Mike Glennon situation. It's a Mike Glennon. Yeah. You know? Rich, you have to get... The Davis Mills of the Richon. Davis Mills. Merton Hanks. Merton Hanks. He'd be long-necking. Seriously, your head's much closer to your torso than this.

39:38Rich Eisen:And much larger. You do have a big head. That's true. Thanks, man. That's a lot of thoughts in here. Thank you. We found out last week. I took care of everybody while you were gone. I want to take this phone call first. Tim in Arizona, you're here on the Rich Eyes. Tim's got a question a lot of people ask me. Here we go. What's up, Tim? First of all, I have to say rest in peace, Larry Fitzgerald and Raymond Berry. No doubt. Two great, great, great people. Yeah, Larry Fitzgerald Sr. passed away as well. So, Brad had mentioned. Thank you, Tim. Yeah, I'm sorry, Sr. And Shea killed it, killed it last week.

40:19Everybody killed it last week. Thank you. Thank you.

40:22Rich Eisen:Thank you to O'Shea and Susie being here and the guests as well. I appreciate it. What's on your mind, Tim? Well, actually, I'd like to ask you this question. I actually am a Pacer fan, and I really enjoyed last year's series, even though we didn't win. It was such a great series. Okay? And I know you're a Jets fan, and I know you're a Knicks fan. and I actually I hate this term because I actually have a daughter named Sophie but I'd like to ask you a Sophie's choice question Rich and it's Knicks or the Jets who if you had to choose between the two would you choose the Jets Super Bowl or the Knicks winning the championship which they can I can only choose one You can only choose one, of course.

41:24One is a lot closer.

41:28Rich Eisen:One is only four wins away right now. One is a lot closer. He's not talking about recency bias, though. He's saying, which one would I? I'll go next. I'll go next. Really? Yeah. Wow. I would. I've been out on the Jets a while. It's been a while for me. I didn't expect that, Chris. Passionate, Renz. Well, yeah, I've seen the tide turn recently. He's tied the tide turn recently. But the Knicks have technically won a championship in your lifetime, and the Jets never had. I don't recall either one, though, man. The Jets were just as I was being born, and the Knicks were when I was four. So I don't remember that.

42:10Rich Eisen:And I've been to more Knicks games and Jets games and things of that nature. Thanks for the call, Tim. I'm greatly appreciative. It's Tim in Arizona. Tim A. What a guy, that Tim. All right. You want to make a prediction on the finals? We're all about to do it. Okay. I want a prediction of the finals, and I want a prediction of who is the MVP. And this is why Knicks fans are nervous. And why after they beat the Cavs in game one, coming back from 22 down, and you're sending a text bing bong to our phones, our voice text. they were chanting we want Wemby on the streets and I'm like careful sports guys don't like stuff like that well it's not just that it's because we are in the process of potentially witnessing rather than watching you know what I mean and Wemby saying this when was this right after the finals right after game seven him saying this is exactly I'm most excited about feeling what I felt when that buzzer went off again and again and again and even more

43:22I'm really it's you you work all these hours we put in it's for this type of emotions

43:36like I want that I want to win so bad it's like my life depends on it

43:45Rich Eisen:Do you hear 22-year-olds talking that way? He sounds like he's been waiting 20 years for this moment. Yeah, absolutely. I haven't heard one like that since Kobe Bryant or LeBron James. And it's hard not to root for him, but I'm going to do a very good job. Bing bong. Do you want to go first then? No, no, no. Please. I'm a guest this time. Chris, you go for it. Spurs in six. Six? Because I'm financially invested. Stefan Castle MVP. Stefan Castle MVP is nuts. What's up, TJ? Me now? Yeah, you. Well, I made this declaration a couple weeks ago, so I got to stick with it. Mitchell Plicks, pick up sticks, Nixon sticks.

44:36And, you know, MVP, I got to go with my guy, the guy who's brought me a lot of torture and torment, but it's all done in good fun. I'm going to go with the big bodega, the big cat, Carl Anthony Townsend. Oh, man. I think – you want to go next? Yeah, yeah, yeah. You know, my tag team partner spitting rhymes like he usually does. You know, that's how we do at NCW, and NCW right now is a New York City win. All right, so right now we're going Nixon 6, OG Ananobi.

45:07Rich Eisen:I don't think it I wouldn't take the field if the Spurs win it it's going to be Wembanyama if the Knicks win it it's Brunson I don't think we need to reinvent the wheel and it may be easy but it's also I want to be accurate I'm not just going to be I mean you are Rich Eisen pardon me everyone's zigging I'm going to go I'm going Knicks in 6-2. It's crazy. That's my heart. My head says it's going to be Spurs in 7. This thing's going to go deep. I honestly don't care who wins for the first time. I'm just here to watch and enjoy. My heart says Knicks in 6. Josh Hart and actual figurative heart. This is the best Knicks team of my life.

46:02Rich Eisen:I've seen them in the Pat Riley era. I saw them in the Van Gundy era. I saw them with Ewing. I've seen them with Bernard King. This team, you take a look at the 99 finals and see who started for the Knicks. Obviously, Ewing was hurt, but the rest of the team, too, with all due respect to those legends that show up, this team is deeper and better. I think. I think. I just think it's one of those series the X factor, you know, the player that says like, okay, these guys are going to do their thing or get clamped. What am I going to do? And I believe in OG like that. And I think Castle could be that guy.

46:43Rich Eisen:And I think Cat could be that guy. It's just, you know, you got Stockholm syndrome. You just love your captor.

46:52Rich Eisen:Carl Anthony Towns. All right, we'll hit game one on Thursday's show. NCW is recording in the moment. Thanks for listening to the Rich Eisen Show podcast. You can watch and listen to The Rich Eisen Show live weekdays from noon to 3 Eastern on ESPN Radio, Disney Plus, and on the ESPN app. The Rich Eisen Show, the podcast.