Celebrating One Year Of The Romesh Ranganathan Show

8:09King's Hawaiian Cinnamon Bites. Don't you love them? There's nothing like it. Sweet swelling is all good.

8:22It's the Romance Ranker, Nathan Show.

8:28Shanthi Ranganathan:With me, Shanti. Oh, my God.

8:33Romesh Ranganathan:Oh, shit.

8:33Shanthi Ranganathan:I got it.

8:35Romesh Ranganathan:I am... once a... What the fuck is wrong with you? Sorry, I just thought I'd get some more. Can we slow-mo that?

8:53Romesh Ranganathan:I really shut myself there. I thought you were just throwing the tube at me. Why didn't you go to catch it? I was just defending myself. Sorry, I didn't mean to scare you. On Monday, we had the almighty actor Stephen Graham on. Mum, did you watch Adolescence?

9:09Shanthi Ranganathan:I did.

9:11Romesh Ranganathan:Did you?

9:12Shanthi Ranganathan:No, I didn't watch it.

9:13Romesh Ranganathan:Okay, cool. You sort of folded quite quickly under questioning there, didn't you? What do you think of toxic masculinity, Mum?

9:22Shanthi Ranganathan:I don't know what to say to that.

9:23Romesh Ranganathan:In that case, you need to watch Adolescence.

9:26Shanthi Ranganathan:Okay.

9:28Romesh Ranganathan:It's exciting, it's our birthday. What are you guys doing for our first birthday? We still haven't gone out for like a team like... No, actually we've never been out as a podcast team, have we? No.

9:38Shanthi Ranganathan:Yeah, I'm still waiting for the date to go as a dinner and celebrate and get drunk.

9:44Romesh Ranganathan:Ben was supposed to organise it.

9:47Shanthi Ranganathan:Why are you blaming him? Why can't he organise? Because it's his responsibility.

9:53I've got a sort of sombre atmosphere now at this party.

9:57Romesh Ranganathan:Anything you want to say to Ben about the fact he's not organised?

9:59Shanthi Ranganathan:No, when he has time he will...

10:01Romesh Ranganathan:When he has time he can organise it. Okay, cool. So we shouldn't tell people that we've never gone out because they'll think they've got like a riff in the team. Yeah. You know, that gives them a competitive advantage. We should tell them that we always hang out. But then that takes a bit of the sheen off me, doesn't it? If people think I'm regularly hanging out with you. I've got a certain, not a reputation, but like a... Maybe we're telling we did it once and it was really good. We went out, didn't we? That was great. Oh my God. It was so fun. It was such a good time. We went temping bowling.

10:37Romesh Ranganathan:And we had hoppers. We had hoppers, went temping bowling.

10:40Shanthi Ranganathan:Because I'm Sri Lankan, you are Sri Lankan. That's not why we did that.

10:45Romesh Ranganathan:But it was nice. Yeah. And then we got kicked out of the bowling alley because Ben stuck his dick in one of the finger holes. Yeah, it happens. Yeah. Some of us stayed out late and we did a bit more dancing. Yeah. And then we had to go to hospital, get it removed, get it removed from Ben. He kept shouting, strike.

11:08Romesh Ranganathan:It's putting the hardworking people at the hospital off.

11:15Romesh Ranganathan:and then he's sort of doing his little bowling jokes hope it doesn't end up being a split you know all that kind of stuff before we get to the questions we've got a surprise message mum let's have a listen hey Romesh and Santi hello hello congratulations on making it to one year god I mean when I look how far you've come when I first came in it was just a tiny room with three sweaty blokes and a dream and it's still three sweaty blokes and you're still in the tiny room and the dream's dead but well you've lasted a lot longer than anyone expected so yay congratulations bye

12:06Shanthi Ranganathan:bye

12:08Romesh Ranganathan:Thank you so much, Michael, for... I don't know what that was. Nice little surprise message. That was good, wasn't it? Can I ask, since Michael Sheen, do you feel like you've gone on any sort of journey across the year? Do you feel like you've learned something about yourself? I've learned the revenues are surprisingly high in this game. I think the connection with the audience? Oh, yeah. Yeah, it's obviously valuable creatively, but I just can't believe so much more money in it than I thought they'd be. No, I said connection with the audience. Do you feel like you've got to know the listeners and the viewers?

12:43Do you feel like...

12:43Romesh Ranganathan:Yeah, I think the viewers to this have enabled this to become more lucrative than a lot of TV jobs. What about skills-wise? As an interviewer, do you think you've improved? Well, I think there were more... Yeah, I think I've got... No, I don't, actually. I think I'm being the same. I think I've got better as an interviewer. I think when you know how much money could potentially come in if it goes well, that kind of, sort of, inspires you to get better. Do you know what I mean? Also, genuine curiosity with some of the incredible guests. I'm curious about, yeah, curious of how much money you can get to.

13:20Romesh Ranganathan:Like, because you sort of think, even though we're doing okay, who knows? The sky's the fucking limit. I mean, look at Joe Rogan, you know, he's smashing it. He's terrible at interviewing.

13:34Romesh Ranganathan:It's such a privilege to have these people in and have a couple of hours of their time. It's such a privilege to come in and do this and then to be paid that amount of money for the amount of effort you're putting in. You'd almost do it for free, wouldn't you? Pardon? Do it for free in a way. Do it for free, but thank God I don't have to. Believe me, it's so far from doing it for free. No, I'm really joking. It's genuinely... Okay, if we can be serious for a moment. Sure. This podcast is just us being us. And I've had the opportunity to interview people that I really respect and admire.

14:05Shanthi Ranganathan:I know.

14:06Romesh Ranganathan:And spending this time every week with you, it's an incredible gift.

14:11Shanthi Ranganathan:And it's been an amazing year. For me as well.

14:14Romesh Ranganathan:Yeah.

14:14Shanthi Ranganathan:Yeah, I feel when I come here, I have my family here. That's how I feel. I am your son.

14:24Romesh Ranganathan:That's why it feels like that. It's like me going, sometimes when I'm doing this, generally the first deb says, I feel like I'm here with my mother.

14:35Romesh Ranganathan:You mean these people in your family. I say people. There you go. You can tell it's a birthday. Fucking hell. There you go, guys.

14:43Shanthi Ranganathan:No, honestly, coming here, don't cry.

14:46Romesh Ranganathan:I'm not crying.

14:47Shanthi Ranganathan:No. Yeah, it was wonderful, man.

14:49Romesh Ranganathan:Yeah.

14:50Shanthi Ranganathan:I'm so grateful for you all to give me this opportunity. I am emotional and I pray and pray that they should grow up and we have a wonderful time.

15:02Romesh Ranganathan:Yeah. Okay. Well, let's hope so. But to be honest, I should take this opportunity. So I'm thinking of...

15:08Shanthi Ranganathan:Well, finishing it off. What does it mean? I would say, you know, we're not going to be doing this forever, are we? 10 more years.

15:18Romesh Ranganathan:10 more years? Yeah. Well, I hope you're fucking recording those episodes way in advance.

15:26Romesh Ranganathan:But, you know. No, it's been amazing. Like, genuinely incredible. Love doing this podcast. I know. It's beautiful. Mum, you've got a little bit of confetti in your hair.

15:35Shanthi Ranganathan:I want it there.

15:36Romesh Ranganathan:You want it there?

15:37Shanthi Ranganathan:I want it there.

15:37Romesh Ranganathan:Okay. Good for you. All right. It's time for the listener question section. If you have a question that you think we could help with, please send your WhatsApp messages and voice notes to 07731 623355 or email podcast at rangabi.com. And don't forget, if you haven't already, please like and subscribe wherever you get your podcasts. Please do it. It's our birthday. We've got... First up, we have an email from Trudy. Hi, Shanthi Roman team. Oh, I would like to ask the amazing team a question first. If you were to go on a luxury holiday, I could only take either... You know what the answer to this is going to be.

16:21Romesh Ranganathan:If you were to go on a luxury holiday, I can only take either Rom or Shanti, who would you choose? Second question is the same for Shanti. So Shanti, if you were to go on a luxury holiday, I can only take Rom or Dinesh, which one would you choose? Absolutely love the podcast, guys. Much love, motherfuckers. Yes! Huh? I knew. See, I'm getting some blowback for this swearing stuff, But fuck yes, Trudy. Tell them to stick up their fucking chuffs. It's our birthday, you fuckos. Fucking suck a ball bag, you gooch-licking shit-eaters. Okay, shall we deal with the questions? Trudy, you've made my birthday.

17:00Romesh Ranganathan:The show birthday. Okay. First question, team. I wonder where this is going to go. If you were to go on a luxury holiday, you could either take me or mum, who would you take? None. Well, it's a very tough decision, obviously. With a lot of deliberation, but I think I'd probably take the person who most treats me like a human being. Makes sense. Makes a lot of sense. By enabling you to earn a living wage? No, no. And I think, you know, sort of like speaks to me with loads of respect. and when I talk to them doesn't walk away in the middle of the office. So I think it would probably have to be Shanty.

17:44Romesh Ranganathan:Oh, that was a big twist at the end. The way you were describing it, I thought he's definitely going to choose me. Okay, what about you, Ben, you fucking pig? Who would you choose? Alfie? You haven't really cooked for me yet, Rom. So I'm going to have to go Shanty as well. Okay. Sorry. That's okay, because I haven't served you. You won't take me on the holiday. Okay, Georgie?

18:12Shanthi Ranganathan:Would you consider chartering a boat for the whole team? Oh.

18:19Romesh Ranganathan:Or a private jet. Georgie, what a way to announce you leaving the podcast. Incredibly ballsy manoeuvre. You said you were going to try gifting more. Did I say that? She makes a note of everything.

18:33Shanthi Ranganathan:Johnny's still waiting for his plus. Okay, but I'm not char...

18:36Romesh Ranganathan:but Georgie, there's a step between starting to gift and chartering a fucking boat. Although, I will tell you this, I... This is embarrassing. I looked, I did quite a lot of research into how to get on Below Deck as a customer. What do you mean get on Below Deck? Do you mean the programme? What do you mean just how to get a boat? No, I wanted to get a boat, but not just a boat, a boat that would be included in Below Deck.

19:04So you plan to buy a boat to then put Captain... No, you charter the boat. What's his name? Captain...

19:10Romesh Ranganathan:Jason, if you get in the down under one, or Captain Sandy. Sandy, that's who I'm thinking of, yeah. You love Below Deck, don't you? That's like... I love it. Didn't you do that at launch, even though you had nothing to... You did like the launch party. Funny story about that, actually. I was asked to do an advert for Below Deck, and they had this whole thing lined up, and I couldn't make the dates for the actual shoot. So they said that you can do a separate one and they'll chop it all in. So they found, because I was like really hectic, they found a studio near Gatwick, like a little studio that they turned up in and I could do some bits as, dressed up as a captain and did some bits.

19:48As I'm pulling in, into the car park at the studio,

19:52Romesh Ranganathan:have I told you this story before? There's a woman there with two blokes and they're sort of getting some stuff out of a car. and as I drive past into the car park she waves at me. I don't think anything about her, I don't know her but I just assumed she'd recognize me. I go in, I do my below deck stuff. Anyway, I come out and go home and she was coming out at that time, waves at me again. Then she sent me a message on Instagram saying, really good to see you. I was just finishing a shoot off myself and then I clicked on her profile and she was an adult actress. I think they'd been filming a smash scene next door to where I was doing Below Deck.

20:34Romesh Ranganathan:So what I'm saying is, versatile little set of studios.

20:40Romesh Ranganathan:Anyway, I looked into it. Four days. No, I think it's three days on that boat,$200 ,000. Is that how much it is? It's a charter, yeah. Well, we could do two days.

20:52Shanthi Ranganathan:Halfway, halfway. If you think I would get to the point

20:57Romesh Ranganathan:where I could be on Below Deck, my dream show, that I would take you guys. You're right. I would. 100%. It's a lot, though, isn't it? It's a lot. I mean, I knew it would be something like that, because when they do the tip, the tip's about 20, 30 grand, right? It's mad. But they do everything. You can literally ask for anything.

21:24Shanthi Ranganathan:What do you mean, anything? If you did hire it, we could do the podcast from the boat. I don't think... Couldn't we? We could get people on, they could come on the jet ski. Who's that coming? It's Tom Cruise. Get the mics up.

21:38Romesh Ranganathan:Yeah. Do you think... What do you think the chances are Tom Cruise would agree to appear on an episode of Below Deck? I don't know if you have... Does it have to be a Below Deck crossover? Can it just be just us on a boat? What's the fucking point? I don't know why... I want to meet Captain Sandy. Or Captain Jason. Any of the captains. Okay, Mum, if you were to go on a luxury holiday, you could only choose... So basically, am I right in saying unanimously it's Mum? I might choose you, Rom, because I feel like we're not... I feel like we should be better friends maybe than we are. And if we went on holiday together...

22:14That would end it. Oh no, that would be good. That might be a really good chance for us to connect. Do you know what I mean? Are we not good friends? Well, sometimes you sort of, you know, like John was alluding to, call us an animal and it sort of feels like, you feel like we're sort of clinging onto your coattails. Sort of leeches, I think was the word. Did I say that? Blood sucking leeches. Yeah.

22:35Romesh Ranganathan:Oh, I said that today, didn't I? Yeah. Um, I mean, look, okay, it's a birthday episode, so I'll say this. The only reason I say stuff like that is because that's how I feel.

22:49Romesh Ranganathan:So, you know, don't read any more into it than that. Do you know what I mean? That's how I think and feel about you. I'll take Shanti. Okay, great.

23:00Shanthi Ranganathan:Thank you, man. Birthday, please! Yeah, yeah. Yay!

23:08Romesh Ranganathan:Um, okay, Mum, if you could go on a luxury, if you were to go on a luxury horror day and you could only take Rom or me or Din, fucking hell. Which one would you choose?

23:18Shanthi Ranganathan:I won't choose any of you. Do you go alone?

23:22Romesh Ranganathan:No, that's not the thing. We're available.

23:25Shanthi Ranganathan:Oh yeah, that's it. Why would I choose you or Linne?

23:29Romesh Ranganathan:If you took them, you'd have to go into quarantine for a while, wouldn't you?

23:36Shanthi Ranganathan:That's horrible.

23:38Romesh Ranganathan:It's fair to say that you... Okay, look, I know that you don't love me or Dinesh more than the other, but you'd rather go with Dinesh than me, wouldn't you?

23:46Shanthi Ranganathan:No, no, no.

23:48Romesh Ranganathan:You'd have a better time if you went with Dinesh?

23:52Shanthi Ranganathan:No.

23:53Romesh Ranganathan:Okay.

23:54Shanthi Ranganathan:I want both of you. I will never change my thing for me. If you are going on holiday, both sons should agree. I want you to be happy for the rest of your life. I don't want to pick one and upset the other one. It's not in me.

24:09Romesh Ranganathan:But why do you prefer Dinesh, generally?

24:11Shanthi Ranganathan:I didn't say I prefer Dinesh.

24:15Romesh Ranganathan:Happy birthday! Okay, I'm only joking, Mom.

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25:19Romesh Ranganathan:We have an email from Mikey. Hi, Ramesh and Shanthi. Long-time listener, first-time caller. Finally excited to pose a question to you both. Following on from your energetic interview with Diane Morgan... Was it energetic? Is that sarcasm? In the episode, we spoke about how both of you were low energy. Oh, yeah, that's right. I think it's a bit of a callback. It's a bit of fun. This is part of the problem with these things. It's like when you... I can never remember stuff like that. So then somebody would do a callback to something, and it shows that they're really invested in the thing. And then I give them that kind of reaction.

25:55Romesh Ranganathan:They're probably very excited. Mike is probably thinking, oh, this is going to be a good way to open the email. And then I've gone, were we? Is he being sarcastic? Well, let's do it again now that we know. Right, right. Keep all that in so the people can show how much I care. Nice. Hi, Ramesh and Shanthi. Long time listener, first time caller. Finally excited to pose you both a question. Following on for your energetic interview with Diane Morgan.

26:18Romesh Ranganathan:We're both low energy, you bloody tinker.

26:24Romesh Ranganathan:Mikey, you little shit. You bloody bastard. I didn't realize you were such dog fanatics. I actually thought they'd piss you off quite like quite a lot of things in life. Had you as a cat man They share your energy. It's fair Anyway backstory before the question both mine and my partner's families over the past seven years have all got dogs All different breeds all different temperaments some great owners and some neglectful owners my parents The final sibling and mostly responsible has decided to get a dog too The only issue is that when all five dogs get together. Holy shit Only ever seems to be at our modest house Now we have two young children and there are eight other children in the family.

27:01Romesh Ranganathan:That's a lot of bodies in the home. That's a horrible way of describing it. We're also getting a bit sick of the garden becoming a shitting ground for the kids. Just kidding. Becoming a shitting ground for these doggos, having trodden in turd that wasn't picked up following my kid's birthday party. Now this is a sensitive one. The question is, can we say no to dogs for future family parties? I understand there's a chance that this will rip my family apart. I'm not too fussed about my partners, only joking. I'm so sick and tired of the dog's bark sending each other off, them shitting everyone in our garden, having to cater for a bonus meal so that the dogs don't eat the bones, and having more people interested in their dog than having a chat.

27:36Romesh Ranganathan:My partner thinks this must go to the grave with us, and we can't ask for that. We can obviously choose a dog for any pub or venue to host our parties, but I don't want to drop 2 plus K on a birthday party. That seems excessive. Love the pod. Love your mum. Love you. Cheers, Mikey. Thank you so much, Mikey, for your email. Appreciate you, bruh. No, I do love dogs. I think dogs are goddamn legends. And, Mum, you love our dogs, don't you?

28:00Shanthi Ranganathan:I love your dogs, yeah. But I love to have one, but when I think about all the problems and looking after them...

28:07Romesh Ranganathan:Yeah, they're difficult to look after.

28:08Shanthi Ranganathan:It's difficult for me.

28:09Romesh Ranganathan:Let's not make light of the fact it's a huge ball ache.

28:12Shanthi Ranganathan:It is for me. You have to take care of them, take them for a walk.

28:17Romesh Ranganathan:Yeah. Do you know what I mean? It's like...

28:19Shanthi Ranganathan:But it's a good companionship, though.

28:21Romesh Ranganathan:Yeah. I think so. Yeah, you should get one.

28:23Shanthi Ranganathan:They do feel, they do feel our sadness when they're happy. And they can sense if something is going to go wrong. Back home, that's the way we feel. I can see what this person means, though, because it is really annoying if you've got loads of dogs in a place. And then you can't have a proper conversation because you're always being interrupted or distracted by dogs. That's quite annoying.

28:46Romesh Ranganathan:I think, Mikey, that you have got yourself into a situation where people, basically people feel comfortable, your family feel comfortable to bring their dogs around. We've got dogs. If people turned up at a house with their dogs, what the fuck are you doing?

29:05Shanthi Ranganathan:They smell the air, don't they? Huh?

29:08Romesh Ranganathan:Yeah. Not to mention the pets.

29:16Romesh Ranganathan:Can you drop like an air horn in there? Yeah. Can you do the noise? Huh? Can you do the noise? Not to mention the pets. Meeh!

29:34Romesh Ranganathan:But I think you need to speak to them. It's like totally reasonable that people don't bring their dogs around to your house. It's wild. Do you know what I'm saying?

29:42Shanthi Ranganathan:But your dogs are well behaved, Maia. Because when I go, they will be in bed.

29:48Romesh Ranganathan:No, we had to get them a bit trained, because they were getting excited when people come into the door. So now when people come round, we go to bed, and then they run to their bed and sit down there. Sit down there. And then they wait, and then when you go finish, they come off.

30:01Shanthi Ranganathan:They come and jump on you and welcome you, and put their head on the lap and start to leak.

30:09Romesh Ranganathan:Okay, it's so weird the way you said that. But it's all pretty wholesome and then started to lick.

30:19Shanthi Ranganathan:Because I don't like the licking people. No, licking people. Because they lick.

30:25Romesh Ranganathan:Actually, what I read was, so licking is like they're kissing. They're showing you a bit of affection. And then when you like shoo them away, it's actually a bit of a rejection.

30:36Shanthi Ranganathan:They won't come to you after that. Well, you don't want them to lick you, do you? I remember one day when I went, they were not trained well that time. And Reggie jumped on my back, put his paws on my shoulder.

30:51Romesh Ranganathan:This is not, by the way, guys, this isn't.

30:53Shanthi Ranganathan:He said, Mum, Reggie has been horny the whole morning. Go along with it.

30:59Romesh Ranganathan:No, I did not say that. Mum, I did not.

31:04Shanthi Ranganathan:That's what I understood.

31:05Romesh Ranganathan:That's not what I said. Basically, that suggests that I said I'll just let the dog fuck you.

31:12Shanthi Ranganathan:You think she put up a bit of a fight first.

31:14Romesh Ranganathan:Yeah, I think you show him that... Otherwise, he won't be able to do it in the wild. You've got to give a bit of resistance, but then eventually acquiesce. That's what I said.

31:26Romesh Ranganathan:Mikey... I was going to say, do you kiss your dogs? No. Or like share ice creams or anything like that? No. No, I do not. No. And look, I don't want to get into trouble with the dog community. If you do do that, it's disgusting. Do you know what I mean? I don't want to upset anybody, but it's rank. Your rank. Stop doing it. No, I just think, I just like... Any... I can't do that.

31:53Shanthi Ranganathan:Well, you never... I never had dogs when you were young. Now, the way you love your dogs, it's unbelievable.

32:00Romesh Ranganathan:I love them, but I don't want them to lick my face. I don't want their tongue to get anywhere near my mouth. I don't want to share food with them. I need to hear that.

32:08Shanthi Ranganathan:What do you mean?

32:09Romesh Ranganathan:We don't even... Anyway, it's... They don't even eat any of our food. When we're eating, they have to go to bed. Like, they're going to sit on their bed. Because otherwise, they start begging and shit. I don't like that. And then, obviously, after the meal, they go in their cage.

32:28Shanthi Ranganathan:No, not the cage. What's a room?

32:32Romesh Ranganathan:No, they have their own room. Oh, no. Of course they do.

32:37Shanthi Ranganathan:Of course they do.

32:38Romesh Ranganathan:It's also got the washing machine in and stuff. But that's their room. It's their utility room. Yeah. Do you... Sorry, are you... Sorry, are you... I just want to ask this question. Are you asking me to check my privilege? Is that what's happening here? No, sorry. No, go on. Just with the dog room and everything. so do you assert is that partly asserting dominance like you're meant to be the alpha of the is that what that thing is about the food is no it's just because it's annoying when they come around and like first of all it's it's that it's not help we feed them a certain amount of food to keep them healthy and then if you're if you'll start giving them food from the table first of all you lose control of how much they're eating and then also you're encouraging them to hover around the table when you're eating.

33:26Romesh Ranganathan:And we can't trust our kids either. They'll just give them everything. So we just thought it's easier to, so they know when we're eating, they go and sit over there. And then it's like, that's a separate time because otherwise it's just, one of the vets that we took the dogs to said that that's one of the main reasons that dogs get overweight and unhealthy or whatever is because people are just giving them their food willingly and they're not thinking about it. So they're giving them healthy dog food and then they're just giving them loads of other stuff and that's what, so we're trying to stop that happening.

33:57Romesh Ranganathan:Do you know what I mean? But I let them bun a zoo, I'll give them a blowback or whatever, that I don't mind. Like you're in control of that. Do you know what I mean? I just go, come on over here, Reggie. He's all fucked up. Eyes go red or whatever. But I then put on some like dance hall and we'd have a nice little evening. Vibing man, so sick.

34:18Romesh Ranganathan:Uh, okay. Thanks Mikey. Hope that helps. Next up, we've got a voice note from Emma. hi Ramesh and Shanti this is Emma from across the pond uh love the show love y 'all's dynamic um my mom and I are also super close uh maybe a little bit less fuck you um being exchanged in our relationship than y 'all but very entertaining um so my question is a two-parter I have a good amount of tattoos already I would love to get a tattoo um ideally with my mom doesn't have to be matching, can be coordinating, but something, uh, you know, for us, she's 68, she's retired, so she can do whatever she wants at this point, um, without having to worry about repercussions.

35:05Um, so how do I convince her to do this first off? And two, um, if y 'all had to get tattoos together, what would you get? It doesn't have to be the same thing. It could be just to represent each other, or I have a feeling, Shanti, you're probably gonna say none for me, and I'm the mom so I can do whatever I want, and that should be respected, which, heard. In which case, if you could make Rom get any tattoo that you wanted, what would it be? Alright, love you guys. Bye.

35:40Romesh Ranganathan:Who sent this voice note in? Emma. Emma, what a great voice note. I also love her going, y 'all. What tattoo would y 'all I'll get. Mom, would you ever get a tattoo? No.

35:53Shanthi Ranganathan:Yes, I like to. Oh. Like a lovely butterfly. Butterfly.

35:59Romesh Ranganathan:Right.

36:00Shanthi Ranganathan:Yeah.

36:00Romesh Ranganathan:Where would you get the butterfly?

36:02Shanthi Ranganathan:My arm. Here.

36:03Romesh Ranganathan:Thank you.

36:05Shanthi Ranganathan:Not in my ass.

36:06Romesh Ranganathan:I honestly thought you were going to say ass. Where on your arm?

36:11Shanthi Ranganathan:Here. And I can see and enjoy.

36:14Romesh Ranganathan:Okay.

36:14Shanthi Ranganathan:Okay?

36:15Romesh Ranganathan:Yeah.

36:15Shanthi Ranganathan:Yeah, yeah, yeah.

36:19Shanthi Ranganathan:All my grandchildren's name.

36:22Romesh Ranganathan:Yeah, okay.

36:23Shanthi Ranganathan:Five of them. I can't know that. It's a little butterfly on the bottom.

36:27Romesh Ranganathan:I don't know if you suddenly rocked up with a load of names on your forearm. It feels like it would ruin your kind of look a little bit, if you don't mind me saying.

36:36Shanthi Ranganathan:You think so? Yeah. Then forget it then.

36:38Romesh Ranganathan:Okay. What a journey we've had. It's sort of...

36:46Romesh Ranganathan:That is, yeah, it's really gone right around the houses. What if we got matching tattoos? What would you like to get?

36:53Shanthi Ranganathan:Yeah, whatever you want.

36:54Romesh Ranganathan:What do you want?

36:56Shanthi Ranganathan:Something nice. You are covered in tattoos. Where are I going to put it?

37:02Romesh Ranganathan:I've got lots of space.

37:04Shanthi Ranganathan:Where?

37:05Romesh Ranganathan:All over. Most of this arm's uncovered. I've got Biggie here. I've got the boys' names here.

37:13Shanthi Ranganathan:Uh-huh. Okay. I will find a place.

37:16Romesh Ranganathan:I've got the podcast contract revenue amount on my wrist.

37:26Romesh Ranganathan:I had to refill the old ink gun there.

37:29Shanthi Ranganathan:Okay. Okay. We could do a tattoo special, couldn't we, and bring a tattoo artist on.

37:34Romesh Ranganathan:I'd love to do that, actually. Yeah. Would you get tattoos as well?

37:37Shanthi Ranganathan:Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. We're part of the team, aren't we? You wouldn't know. No one would really know. I'd know. Yeah, but I wouldn't want to waste... And I'd hold you to it. Yeah, but I wouldn't want to waste the sort of air time because no one can see us.

37:48Romesh Ranganathan:Yeah, we do it off camera, but then we do a reveal. I think it seems no one cares about Arta, but I think you guys doing that would be... No, but you're part of the team, remember?

37:56Shanthi Ranganathan:Oh, yeah. Now they are part of the team, is it? All these times they're animals. They're part of the team. What are I talking about? You are like the... Bully. Bully and the change colour that the animal thinks What's that? Chameleon. Chameleon.

38:15Romesh Ranganathan:Why don't we... Okay, how about this? Change of plan. We get tattoos and you get branded.

38:28Romesh Ranganathan:Would you ever get a tattoo for this podcast, Mum? I will. That's a good idea. I'm going to tell you now. If you wanted to get... If we wanted to do a tattoo special, we get tattooed while we're doing it. I'm up for that. You up for that? Why don't we get a little one that doesn't cause too much discomfort? So, for example, TRRS, the Romesh Ranganathan show.

38:45Shanthi Ranganathan:Okay. You can get that on us. Yeah, yeah. Yeah?

38:47Romesh Ranganathan:Yeah. We get that live. Can you sort it out?

38:50Shanthi Ranganathan:Yeah.

38:50Romesh Ranganathan:I can get my... Should I get Paul, the guy that does my tattoos, to come down here and do it on the podcast? Yeah? Yeah. Okay, great. Would you get it across your chest?

38:58Shanthi Ranganathan:Oh, I can't do it. Not you. Sorry. Not you, Shanti. Sorry. I was looking at Romesh. What the fuck is... What the fuck? Yes.

39:05Romesh Ranganathan:No, I was looking at Romesh. What the fuck, man? I cannot believe you would ask Mum that. No, he didn't ask! That is fucking insane! No, don't cover up for him now. Let's just get this out in the open. Everybody knows this. He was looking at... Why are you asking my mum that? To tattoo it across her chest? What's wrong with you, man? That's a no? I don't know. Ask her. Just high on the happy birthday vibes.

39:31Shanthi Ranganathan:Yeah, that's it. Yeah, yeah.

39:34Romesh Ranganathan:Yeah, we'll get it done. Okay. Live on the potty.

39:36Shanthi Ranganathan:Not on the chest, but...

39:37Romesh Ranganathan:Not on the chest, no. You can get the... Maybe mum can get the butterfly as well. That'd be nice.

39:44Shanthi Ranganathan:Oh, that'll be lovely. Pink one. Pink and turquoise.

39:48Romesh Ranganathan:Let's let Paul deal with that.

39:50Shanthi Ranganathan:Okay.

39:51Romesh Ranganathan:Alright. Paul, pink and turquoise butterfly, please. Black.

40:00The follow-up question there was also if Shanthi had to choose one.

40:04Romesh Ranganathan:Oh, mum, what would you rather get a tattoo of? TRRS or Idris? Would you get a tattoo of Idris?

40:11Shanthi Ranganathan:Why would I do? Idris is not coming here, is it?

40:14Romesh Ranganathan:Okay, what if Idris message does? If Idris comes, I'll have the Idris on my hand. If Idris comes, would you get an Idris tattoo?

40:19Shanthi Ranganathan:Yes, I will.

40:20Romesh Ranganathan:Idris Elba.

40:22Shanthi Ranganathan:Because all the, my big mouth, I will do that.

40:26Romesh Ranganathan:Idris, this is a message to you from the Ramesh Ranganathan show. On our anniversary episode, my mum will get a tattoo of you on her face?

40:39Shanthi Ranganathan:On my arm.

40:41Romesh Ranganathan:On her arm.

40:42Shanthi Ranganathan:Everybody can see it. Yeah?

40:44Romesh Ranganathan:Everybody can see it. What would you get? The word Idris or his face?

40:47Shanthi Ranganathan:His face.

40:49Romesh Ranganathan:Your face. This is... Okay, now I'm starting to have doubts. You're gonna get his face in your forearm?

40:54Shanthi Ranganathan:Yeah.

40:57Romesh Ranganathan:And there you go. That's the tattoo warning system that we have when it feels like someone on the podcast is gonna make a bad decision. Mum has just triggered it Idris Mum will get a tattoo of you If you come on the podcast Will you come on the podcast? There you go Please

41:14Shanthi Ranganathan:Please come on the podcast We are waiting I can't imagine

41:18Romesh Ranganathan:He's not coming on the podcast But speaking of that Who would you like to see In the next year mum On the podcast Who's your dream guest That we could get on here Not that you'd be here Because you're Only a Thursday episode Yal

41:33Shanthi Ranganathan:I can't think of anything Yali I can't think of anybody at the moment. Nobody. Give me a surprise. That'll be lovely.

41:41Romesh Ranganathan:It's a surprise. Even the ones that we've had on in the past are a surprise to you. But who would be the ultimate, your ultimate hero that we could have on the podcast?

41:53Shanthi Ranganathan:Tom Selleck?

41:54Romesh Ranganathan:Tom Selleck. Okay. Um, team, if you could make Tom Selleck happen. Come here. What about you, Rom? Who are you hoping to meet next year? Look, I'm going to be honest with you. This podcast is so much fun. And I enjoy it so much. Every episode is a dream guest. And the money.

42:25Romesh Ranganathan:What's our next special? By the way, we've done Australia. We've done... What else have we done? Chiliole. We've got a tattoo special. We've got a tattoo special locked and loaded. We did an art special, didn't we? At some point, there'll be an Idris special. He's not coming on. Okay. And then, what about an LA special where we're all in America? Yeah, I'd love to do that. Yeah. Take it on the road. We could go quite minimal with that. Because in LA, they're used to shooting, aren't they? So I guess we'd go out, wouldn't we? Full team, kind of like road trip. I don't think he needs a full team.

42:55Romesh Ranganathan:Road trip! It feels like a very... On the road, guys! It feels like a very carrying Colston Newcastle vibe. I feel like Mum and I could go. Yeah, with the team. Do we all travel business class? How does it work when we do that? Let me take the business class off the end. The question is, do we all travel? And the answer is no. Nobody's saying about Los Angeles, nobody can film a podcast out there. Not the same way we can. There's a certain magic, isn't there?

43:25Shanthi Ranganathan:I can get the money from the bank if we want. Yay!

43:31Romesh Ranganathan:And then you can come back and you can shit it all away on an outdoor shed.

43:35Shanthi Ranganathan:Yeah, why not?

43:37Romesh Ranganathan:On your seating area.

43:38Shanthi Ranganathan:Yeah.

43:39Romesh Ranganathan:Yeah, we'll do an LA special. That'd be great, wouldn't we? Have a nice time. Obviously, we'll send all the rushes back to you and you guys can edit it up here so that it's all ready for when we get back. So you'll take care of all the producing out on the ground? Yeah. Oh. What does it take? An email. The Romeshweng and Nathan show's coming out. Film it. We'll pay you. And they go, holy fuck, that international smash. Oh my God, of course we've heard of you. We call you Ramesh Rogan out here.

44:05Shanthi Ranganathan:Oh. You are a good... We call you Rogan Ranganathan. I must tell you, everybody says you've got a lovely son, very helpful, even at school. You help a lot of people. You put yourself down sometimes. I think sometimes I had to pinch myself. What a nice boy I have produced. You are a wonderful man, Rami. I have to tell you, yeah. Why are you saying that? It's true, son. I get people talking to me and telling me how wonderful you are. I don't know what to say sometimes. Your son is so good and very helpful. I can't hear this.

44:46Romesh Ranganathan:This is too much.

44:47Shanthi Ranganathan:Cry then. So nice. That's really, really nice. Yes, I do hear. Someone like that takes the team with them wherever they go, doesn't it? No, they do. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah. Instead of calling, fucking animals.

44:59Romesh Ranganathan:Business class as well. I didn't say fucking animals.

45:01Shanthi Ranganathan:Ah, sorry. Okay, animals. Cut that. Fucking.

45:05Romesh Ranganathan:Can you cut the fucking out of when mum said fucking animals? Oh, please. No, mum, that's really sweet, but I can't, I don't really, I'm not really good at taking compliments. I feel much more comfortable with the abuse and I assume that's what's true of everyone else, which is why I talk to you creatures so honestly.

45:21Shanthi Ranganathan:I can talk about you now because it's a one year podcast. podcast, there was a girl who rang the, I don't know whether it is, radio show, and she talked about you, and she said, I was very down, I was upset, and I spoke to Mr. Ranganathan while I was studying in Hesuvik, and he explained so many things. Now I'm a doctor now, he said. I did everything, I listened to him, and because of him, I'm in this position.

45:57Romesh Ranganathan:Yeah, well, I think it takes a bit more than year nine maths. But yes, thank you. I appreciate the compliment.

46:03Shanthi Ranganathan:You spoke to her. You advised her. That's why she calmed down. Yeah, because of you.

46:10Romesh Ranganathan:I can't handle it. Just say something horrible now, just to balance it.

46:13Shanthi Ranganathan:Okay, why are you not going to cry?

46:15Romesh Ranganathan:No, let me try. Should we do like a little emotional? Do you know like how they do on Diary of a CEO? Okay, mum, say something nice to me and I'm gonna try and then can you like go to black and white and add some music? Yeah, so Shanthi, you say something nice and then we'll just leave a really long gap. That's what they do on Diary of a CEO. Yeah, okay.

46:35Shanthi Ranganathan:Everywhere I go, Ramesh, they always ask about you and how wonderful you are, how lucky I am to have a son like you.

46:53Romesh Ranganathan:Well, I, uh, that's, um, that's a really wonderful thing to hear. And, um,

47:05Romesh Ranganathan:thanks so much for saying that. It means a lot. You're welcome, sir.

47:13Shanthi Ranganathan:Oh my god Makes me so happy I'm going to go in my boots I haven't watched RSEO But I think they do that as well

47:24Romesh Ranganathan:Thank you so much for joining us On this birthday episode Of the Ramesh Ranganathan show We hope you had a good time On the Ranganathan show We'll see you for another probably year Then we'll wrap it all up But thank you so much. Join us next week when we'll be a week older. Peace out. Thanks for... Like and subscribe, please. And keep sending in your messages and stuff like that. We'll see you next time, you pricks. Bye. Yeah. Oh. Suck it, you fuckos. Thank you so much for watching and listening to this episode. Before you go, if you've enjoyed this episode and you've not subscribed, that's a bold decision crazy behaviour follow and subscribe to the Romesh Ranganathan show wherever you listen it helps me really like really helps me it helps the team and it costs you absolutely nothing we drop episodes every Monday and Thursday Mondays I'm joined by great guests Thursdays my mum Shanti joins me to answer your questions and family dilemmas we'll see you Monday with another great guest and back here with mum on Thursday if you've got a problem you want to solve or a story you want to share send it to podcast at rangabi.com, voice not or text us on 07731 623 355.

48:41Romesh Ranganathan:We can't promise good advice, but you might end up on the show. See you soon.

48:46Shanthi Ranganathan:Oh, shut up, Romesh. Ugh, I hate Mondays. King's wine cinnamon swirl bite? Taylor Hanson? Sure, I'll try one. Mmm. Hey, let's get back to work, please. But Taylor Hanson's making my day way better with these new soft and swirly King's Hawaiian Cinnamon Bites. Taylor Hanson? Nice. Try one. Mmm. Bites, two, four, five, two. King's Hawaiian Cinnamon Bites. Don't you love them? There's nothing like it. Sweet, swirly, it's all good.

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