Romesh & Shanthi Open Up

18:10Romesh Ranganathan:Yeah, go on. It's true. Yeah. They don't realise what I had gone through. Yeah. You have seen how long I cried and we didn't have food to eat. even sometimes I won't have 10 pence to buy things or to put petrol for the car when people criticise me attack me I am becoming who's criticising and attacking you I think you've got a bit of a persecution complex if you look at all the comments you're more popular than I am on this podcast that's true I'm not talking about I'm not talking about my lovely comments they gave I love them all who are you talking about? I don't know what that means. Oh, okay.

18:54Romesh Ranganathan:I'm not going to mention it. Can I offer you a little bit of genuine advice? Yeah. I think part of the problem in the way that you're reacting to this is the idea that things are happening to you. It is happening, yeah. No, no, no. But what I'm saying to you is, when Dad did what he did, he wasn't doing it to you. He was just doing a thing. Somebody else. No, no, no, no, no. I'm being... He was doing... He made mistakes, but he wasn't doing those mistakes thinking I hope this really upsets you he was doing these things without being considerate and so what you're what you've what you've in my opinion you've got yourself into a mindset where dad and the world are against you that's not the case it was horrible what happened to you but you know that it wasn't deliberate it wasn't orchestrated to happen to you it's just unfortunate that it did and you now have a choice you either keep revisiting that thing that's full of pain and horrible or you draw a line under it and you think about where are you now?

19:54Romesh Ranganathan:You're doing a podcast with your son people are loving you online it's going really really well where do you want to spend your mindset? Dwelling in this bit now or thinking about what happened to you and you can't believe what happened to you? I'm going to enjoy my life now So that's what I think you should do Your choice to be happy is in your hands now You could literally never think about it again It's totally up to you in my opinion. That was a wonderful advice. It was actually. Coming from my son, it touched my heart. I bless you, man. Honest to God. It's such an advice. Good advice. We skipped past the bit where we were best friends and you were going to say why, but...

20:31Romesh Ranganathan:Oh, yeah. Why do you think Ben's your best friend? Because he put you on television, right? Yeah. No, no. That's not the reason. I'm sorry. I was just quoting you directly. Forgive me. Why are you putting words in your mouth? I didn't. I actually put words into my mouth that you said. You sometimes are horrible, okay? We might need VAR on that one. Can we cut back to what mum exactly said, please, now? He's a best friend, mum. I know because of Ben, I'm on telly. You can email me your apology or you can WhatsApp me a voice note, mum, at 07731 623 355, as our listeners and viewers also can. We are loving your feedback on the podcast.

21:10Romesh Ranganathan:We love hearing your questions on dilemmas and we'd love to get more. You can also email us at podcast.rangabe.com. Yes. This episode is brought to you by EDF, Britain's biggest generator of zero carbon electricity. We all want to make a difference, but most of us can't even remember to take the recycling out on the right day. Now, imagine you've bought an electric car. You're proud. You're saving the planet. You legend. Until you realise you're also the person Googling, can you plug an EV into a normal socket? If you join EDF's EV tariff and pod drive, you can get an EV charger, standard installation and warranty with zero upfront costs.

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22:24Romesh Ranganathan:So get started and join PodDrive at edfenergy.com slash pod. UK fuel mix disclosure information published by the government department, DESNES recognises electricity from wind, solar and nuclear fuel produces zero carbon dioxide emissions at the point of generation. For verification, visit edfenergy.com slash zero dash carbon. So good, so good, so good. New summer arrivals are at Nordstrom Rack stores now. Get ready to save big with up to 60 % off brands like Rag & Bone, Levi's, Adidas and Free People. Join the Nordic Club to unlock exclusive discounts, shop new arrivals first and more. Plus, buy online and pick up at your favorite rack store for free.

23:05Romesh Ranganathan:Great brands, great prices. That's why you rack.

23:13Romesh Ranganathan:Let's hear the first one, please. This is Heather, mum. Yeah. Okay. Hi, Ramesh and Shanti. So at Halloween, there was a group of kids and they kind of came back, I realised, like more than once. So two or three times or maybe 14 or 15. They didn't have any costumes. And I mean, it wasn't that busy and I had sweets. but by the third time I just said no because they didn't have a trick I mean I just felt like if you want to trick or treat when you're a teenager you should be putting in a bit more effort uh and also maybe you should just like visit more than one street and not just return to the same houses multiple times but then I'm wondering if I'm some kind of a Halloween Grinch so what would you have done um mom do you want to start with the advice my advice I don't think is going to help her.

24:05Romesh Ranganathan:Okay, go on. Maybe she's very attractive. Those boys must have gone three, four times just to see her, not for the sweets. Why did they ask for sweets then? That's an excuse they are using. Heather, in my opinion, you're the victim of a crime. God. Trick or treating, okay, is when you dress up and you turn up as a little kid, okay, and you ask for some sweets. and you get the sweets and then you go off to the next house. Repeatedly sort of terrorising someone on their own in their house, in my opinion, is a dick move, okay? I also think there should be... Honey, explain to me what a dick move is.

24:50Romesh Ranganathan:It's just like a... It's a dick move. So instead of they are using their brain? No, that's not what I'm saying. I'm saying they're behaving like dicks, right? Heather, lovely, lovely Heather, she sounds lovely, right, has got these sweets in to hand to little children, right? And then three teenagers turn up and repeatedly hit her up for more and more sweets. It's unacceptable. How old were they doing? 14 or 15, she says. I'm going from the information in the WhatsApp voice note. Okay. What do you think? Maybe they were annoyed about something that she did. Or she was very... No, I'm just thinking.

25:32Romesh Ranganathan:I do feel like you're doing a bit of victim blaming here. she's in her house she's bought some sweets she's been nothing but lovely heather you're not being a halloween grinch these guys these kids are out of order you know and it might be that you know i i'm in a place in my life now i'm trying to look on the other person's side of things and maybe they were deprived of sweets and chocolates when they were children and they feel somewhat vindicated you know validated by getting some sweets and they thought it was funny they don't you know it's but at the end of the day their behavior was unacceptable in my opinion i also think there should be an upper age limit on trick-or-treating of 10 there you go i said it if you're older than 10 stay home or buy some sweets for other people to come and take from you but trick-or-treating when you're little is cute when you're older it's theft it's essentially burglary you turn up at the house if a kid comes up and goes trick-or-treat what trick-or-treating is is please can i have a treat otherwise i'm going to do something horrible to you.

26:31Romesh Ranganathan:That's what trick-or-treating is. That's cute when they're this size. If somebody taller than you not wearing a costume goes trick-or-treat, go fucking take everything. Can I have my MacBook if you want? That's not fun. That's not Halloween-y. That's robbery. You know what I mean? It's 10 too young, isn't it? I think you can go to 12. 12, fine. And I think it depends on how big you are. If you're 10 but you're 6 foot, I'm sorry, mate. Wind it in. 13 in full costume? 13 in full costume, 14 unacceptable, full stop. Yeah. And also, by the way, I think you should have to make a bit of an effort. You can't be wearing your own clothes and have some tiny plastic horns.

27:17Romesh Ranganathan:I think you should at least, like, if you're taking sweets for people for nothing, you should really dress up. I'm saying this quite angrily because my car got egged last year. Did it? Yeah. What? My car got egged last year by trick-or-treaters. Was that because of this policy? No, I wasn't even in. I think they... I don't know. I think they knew I lived there. Anyway, the house got egged. Are you all right, Mum? I'm fine. Oh, right. I thought you were just really up. Shanti, do you give out sweets at Halloween? I do. I do. What do you give them? Just put a little bucket and put all the sweets in there.

27:52and sometimes once for 28 years I didn't I wasn't at home

28:00Romesh Ranganathan:Mum wasn't home for 28 years I didn't mean that way I was working yeah different shift do you remember when you were in LA? do you remember doing Halloween in LA? yes yes that was beautiful thoroughly enjoyed I never experienced anything like that they really go to town don't they? would you ever go full like get your house with all the lights? I love to do that, but I don't have an electrician to do that. It will cost me a lot, so I'd rather not do it. It won't cost you a lot. Do you want to hear from Natalie from Southern Spain? Thank you so much, Heather, for your message. It was great. I thought it was great.

28:35Romesh Ranganathan:I thought it was informative. I thought you had a nice tone. It's exactly the type of voice note we like here at the Ramesh Rang and Nathan Show. And Shanti! Yay! I'm just doing the bit. Okay, let's see the next one. Hi, Ramesh and Shanti. Hello. Just a quick one. this is Natalie in southern Spain I listened to your pod with Big Tom D and loving the new Rangonathan show I think the episodes do need to be a little bit longer though because quite frankly I can't get enough of the both of you and you both have me in stitches with tears streaming down my face with laughter every time i listen so thank you for that uh question for shanti in a fight between romesh and dinesh who would win and why it's such a turn isn't it

29:35she said it was so sweet so so sweet and then which one would kill the other i think dinesh will kill you. Because he doesn't think before he jumps, he says something, he's outspoken. And you go quiet because just for peace and quiet, you just won't say anything. I think he will win.

29:57Romesh Ranganathan:In a fight? In a fight, yeah. He'll beat me up? Yeah. But that's not to do with being quiet and stuff. Why do you think Dinesh could beat me up?

30:08Because you don't walk away, man. You won't fight. I've never seen you fighting.

30:12Romesh Ranganathan:Okay. That's why. You are a very calm, quiet person. I can't see that you're fighting with your brother. You will go out of the house or just be quiet. Well, I just want to take this opportunity to say, Dinesh, if you're watching, if you fucking want it, you can have it. I'll fucking give it to you by the bucket load. Your face will look like this Otolenghi meringue by the time I finish with you, little fucking wanker.

30:40I just want to call him out. There's been a lot of shouts for Dinesh to come on this as well. Would you have him on here?

30:45Romesh Ranganathan:Would you have Dinesh on the podcast? I 100 % would. I would. I'd love to. Could we start the patron and have you fight? Can I be honest with you? Dinesh would beat the shit out of me. There you are. He would beat the living shit out of me. And I'm not embarrassed to admit it. Dinesh is like nails compared to men. The words that he says. Can kill you. What do you mean? Like, very sharp words he uses. I lose my head. Honestly, Dinesh is like so sharp-tongued and he can just cut through you with something he said. Yes. And I just think, where the hell did he get it from? Where did he get it from?

31:28Just the ability to sort of crush your self-esteem

31:31Romesh Ranganathan:like a meringue with just one phrase. I just, what the hell? Because Dad wasn't like it. I just... LAUGHTER It's so... I can't... What the hell? It's me, me, me. It's just weird how genetics work, isn't it? Where did that come from? It's the old nature versus nurture question, isn't it? I guess we'll never know the answer. Okay. This is the part of the show we call Altogether Different, brought to you by Channel 4, the home of Altogether Different shows. Mum? Yes? You've been in your fair share of weird situations, haven't you? what's the most unusual thing that's happened to you this week there was a such a nice gentleman was shouting hello Ramesha's mom you both of you are so funny we are enjoying the show yeah is it the garden center wasn't it no I was driving front of three bridges sorry sorry I thought you have shutters down yeah promacious mom I love you son and you make us happy I said I love you too then I went I continue an unusual thing that happened to me this week yeah I went to the cuz I'm doing some tour shows in the United States of America yeah and I had to get my visa yeah so I went to the American Embassy yeah and they first of all I got recognised in the queue and the guy fast-tracked me through and then you've got to go and get your thing stamped and then you have to get your photos verified anyway so then I go to the front of the queue I go do all the bits and pieces and then I go to my interview do you know the first question they asked me was do you have any nationalities apart from Indian and I said to her I'm not Indian I'm British and then she got so embarrassed about the mistake she granted me my visa that's not the reason that she granted you the visa what do you mean you're just making it up i'm not making up that happened you are you are maybe she must have asked you that question yeah she had to check everything before you issue the visa so they ask you how famous you are no they do mom they do how famous are you she said to me are you internationally recognized what did you say yes yeah well I said I've toured in Europe and Australia and America before yeah you know I'm being modest but I remember when we went really that guy asked a question oh why are you here what's your reason for your visit was that a baking show that we were doing no we went for this no it's not baking sure I tell you what is great baking show though Channel 4's wonderful Great British Bake Off.

34:23It is?

34:24Romesh Ranganathan:Yeah. I watch that program all the time. Do you? I do. Do you like that show mum? I do. I like to improve my icing skill, the cakes, and you are part of, you have got a known people in the bakery, why don't you take me there and one day let me ice a cake um i do part own a bakery mom that is true i don't think you need to come to the bakery to ice you can do a lot of people do it at home just to get and i'll tell you what happens is they do it at home and then they compete against each other for example in something like channel 4's great british bake-off that's it yeah there you are do you like bake-off i do like Yeah, that's what that's I would say I wait to see the What do you call that when they finish all the cakes and Signature no signatures the first bit.

35:18Romesh Ranganathan:Yeah, and then they do the technical. Yeah, and then they do the showstopper. Oh That beautiful. Yeah, yeah, do you make do you bake sort of quite do you bake cakes? I used to make promises one wedding cake. I made did you yeah Have you forgotten yeah Thank you for making that there. It was beautiful. Never forget that. What was it? It was a fruit chocolate... No, fruitcake. Richcake. Richcake. Sri Lankan fruit richcake. It was wonderful. I'll never forget it. How many tears? A few when I wished we'd bought a cake. Oh, my God. I spent all day making it. Bake Off is great. What's your favourite moment from Bake Off?

36:11Favourite moment? Sometimes when they cut through, it collapses, the cake. That's your favourite moment? Yeah.

36:20Romesh Ranganathan:I do like it when shit goes wrong. I can't remember the names of the people, but do you remember when, I think it was Ian, maybe, had his ice cream in the freezer, and then was it Diane? Yeah. Diane then was trying to find space in the freezer freezer, took his ice cream and just put it on the side, then carried on. Then he came over and he's like, oh, where's my ice cream? He's looking in the freezer. He goes, we put it over here. And then he just threw the whole thing in the bin. Yeah. Other thing I enjoyed. Oh, yeah. Thanks for listening. You tried to start talking, I reckon, rough estimate, eight times while I was in the middle of that sentence.

36:57I enjoy.

36:58Romesh Ranganathan:Do you? Okay, go on. Alison Hammond, isn't it? New York, I want now you can push the door inside. When you open it, she just stood there with the cake and said, where's the door? Because you had to put the cake in and shut it. She couldn't find the door. It's gone in. I found that funny. Yeah, it was funny. It's just upsetting that you were thinking about that the whole time I was talking.

37:30What did I ever say?

37:33Romesh Ranganathan:yeah no thank you thanks but that's how conversations work isn't it just both pretending to listen to each other do i interrupt quite a lot you don't interrupt then that much no who's your favorite host mum the lady with the different glasses i love the style do you know that she um i did a show a radio show pru leith was a guest and i started trying to do a running joke about tray bakes and pru leith said to me if you're trying to make this a running joke, I don't think it's that funny. That's why she's famous, man. What do you mean? She's not famous for that. Did I say that? Oh. She knows what she's talking about.

38:13Yeah, you're right. That's why.

38:15Romesh Ranganathan:You know you're right. Yeah, of course. Otherwise, everybody will walk all over you. She stopped you there. Yeah. So I like that. Well, I did it another six or seven times. Can I just say, who's making jam donuts from scratch? Like, sorry, it's 12 steps and they're six for a quid you know how much better can they taste is the point I'm trying to make you gotta get the dough then inject the jam then deep fry then you inject the jam after no you can't inject the jam and fry no sorry I got that wrong you can fry it then cool it down then inject the jam okay okay channel 4 has something for everyone to stream something all together the difference today.

38:58Romesh Ranganathan:Like, for example, Great British Bake Off. Yes, I love the programme. Thank you so much for listening to Thursday's episode of the Ramesh Ranganathan Show. We're going to be back on Monday with another great guest. Mum, you can say whatever you like. It's been a real journey, this. Thanks for giving me the opportunity to talk to you and thanks for supporting and I'm so grateful. Thanks again. I love you all so much. Wonderful. Thank you. Great work. if you've enjoyed this episode of the romish rang and nathan show make sure you follow wherever you get your podcasts apple spotify youtube all the big ones and you can enjoy more great content like this and in fact i'd go further to say even if you didn't enjoy this episode just follow anyway for shits and giggles and if you've got an interesting story or a question for my mum and i or even like a family dilemma you'd like us to help you with please do get in touch via our email address podcast at rangaby.com or you can voice note or text on this number 0 7 7 3 1 62 33 55 thank you for joining us i'm romesh rang and nathan and this has been the romesh rang and nathan show what a narcissist see you next time oh shut up romesh pandora jewelry brings the sparkle to your summer now with even better prices enjoy up to 50 off select styles from personalized pieces to must have favorites made for the summer.

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