3 BIGGEST MYTHS to The Law of Attraction: Manifest Your Reality

34:28And what is the biggest lessons that meditation or meditation practices has provided for you? It provides a quiet space where the chatter, you realize that your thoughts are not you. And that left to your own devices, there'll be a lot of voices in your head just going all the time. And they're not you. and they don't mean anything, and they're really repetitious, and they're not working in your best interest. So if your thoughts aren't you, then what are you? I suppose you are the unchanging part of yourself that's always there from probably from the time you're born until the time you die, and maybe before and after.

35:31It's what's really inside. It's not changeable. It's what you came with. It's not the thinking mind. It's almost being the observer of the thoughts. The one who sees the thoughts. That sounds right. Yeah. Observing the thoughts. Thank you. Yeah, that's what I was hearing you say. When do you feel the most loved, Rick? I would say in general, I feel loved. It's a good feeling. I feel spiritually connected, and that gives me a great feeling of peace. Where do you think you'd be in your life if you weren't a meditator? and where do you think you'd be if you allowed yourself to play with drugs and alcohol?

36:33Yeah, I can't really predict. I would say meditation. Without meditation, I don't know who I would be. It's such a big part of who I am. Informed so many, everything. My understanding of the world is based on learning to meditate when I was young. So I don't know who I would be without that. Do you think you would have as much internal harmony and peace and external success without meditation? No, certainly not internal peace. I don't know about success. I wanted to ask you a question about comparison. You mentioned the NBA basketball player needing to post more on social media based on what their team or the coaches, or maybe not the coaches, but maybe the general managers wanted them to do.

37:25With artists, I see a lot of people competing and being in comparison versus just sharing their truths in an authentic way. And sometimes on social media, people are vulnerable because it gets attention and then they're over vulnerable and then that becomes a game in itself. But in a world where everything is oversaturated seeming and there is a lot of competition for attention, how can an artist stay true to their inner voice and not be in comparison, but be willing to collaborate and also see success in others and be okay with it? Yeah, I think staying out of it, you know, like not participating in that game, that's someone else's game.

38:15That's someone else's game. I would suggest play your own game. I can remember having a conversation with a big, one of the biggest artists in the world who described an album that they were going to make. And, and I had just seen them play in a stadium full of people screaming and crying. And it was not Paul McCartney. And the album that they were describing was one that none of those 70 ,000 people screaming and crying wanted to hear. It was clear to me. And I remember saying, that's not your hand. Like, when you're playing poker, you can't just play any cards. you play the you play your hand based on the cards you've been dealt so depending on the artist you are like um it'd be like there was a time i think when metallica felt like we don't really want to be a heavy metal band we want to be a pop band because pop bands were what's popular and we have reached a ceiling being a heavy metal band that did not go well that was a bad idea they weren't playing their hand they weren't they weren't embracing metallica oh and i think if you embrace your part it's your best chance being true to yourself not saying oh well those people over there are getting popular doing this other thing i don't really like it but it's really working for them maybe i could try that recipe for disaster so don't chase something that's not your hand no yeah but it sounds like correct me if i'm wrong you know the the example i'm thinking of is like lady gaga came onto the scene doing i guess pop music and became very popular but then said hey i want to do this more kind of jazzy bluesy like tony bedding thing she was being true to herself and that's what i want to do and i don't care if anyone likes it perfect but it's what i want to do at this season of my life true to herself and it may lose money but she was not doing it because I think people like this right this is working over here so I'm gonna try to catch their heat she was not doing that she probably knew people wouldn't like it only a small audience didn't care yes she didn't care that was true to herself this is what she wanted to do and she did it wow were you uh in touch with her at all during that that season or I can't remember if we talked about that yeah I'm curious but that's I'm curious if she's just said hey, I'm going to do this and this is my thing.

40:55And for sure, that's pretty cool. Yeah. No, I love it when an artist does something unexpected, whether it works or not, you know, it's like, it's, they're being true to themselves, right? They get to be a better artist doing that. Whereas the other example is someone, you know, whether it's Metallica or whoever is like chasing a bigger audience or something. Now, if that's true to them, that music, then cool. There's an audience there and go for it. Yeah. But it's also something about staying true to yourself in terms of, um, if you come up making a certain kind of music and you get popular making that music, a feeling of, well, this is all anybody wants from me.

41:36So even though I don't care about it anymore, I have to keep doing it. That's a disaster as well. Right. That doesn't work. who has been the most musically gifted artist that you've been able to work with or maybe a few people that you're just like they were so musically like talented and gifted it was just there've been a lot yeah there've been a lot i i can say the first time i was in the studio with carlos santana and he started playing guitar it felt like this is coming from another planet or john fashanti when he plays from the guitarist in the red hot chili peppers when he plays guitar it's a transcendent experience.

42:17Spiritual. Yeah. And there's a drummer named Chris Dave, who's best drummer I've ever heard. And no matter what he plays, anything he plays is the greatest thing you've ever heard. The simplest thing. He can make anything interesting, just the way he plays it. Not the parts. It doesn't have to be complicated. It doesn't have to be, look at me. Just the touch, the feel, the tone is miraculous. Something you said before is the only goal is to be the best version of ourselves. Is there anything blocking you from becoming the best version of yourself moving forward? I don't think so. Yeah, I wouldn't say I'm there.

43:01Right. But I'm always striving. Always. Anything I can do to get closer, I'll do. Wow. Yeah, you're willing to learn something new. You're willing to try something on. Or change anything. Right. What do you think is the best habits that an artist can have that maybe you have individually, but also that you see in other artists? I would say dedication to the craft, whatever, whatever their craft is, dedicating themselves to it, taking it very seriously and being free to play in it, you know, like taking it seriously at the time, at the time when it warrants being taken seriously and having fun and being free in a play way to allow the thing that's worthy of being taken seriously to appear right taking it seriously and also allow yourself to play in it as well yeah you well the play always is where it starts it starts in this playful way where nothing is serious and there are no stakes and then through that something appears and then in order to get that into condition to share there's a grueling effort yeah take that seriously and sometimes it's sometimes you do a grueling effort and then you realize oh that thing that happened the first day, that's the best version of it.

44:17But you don't know that until you've maybe banged your head against the wall for six months working on it and then you realize, you know what, that first five minutes was the best. That was it. You can't know that until you go past, you know, you have to work past it to see this was the one. This is the best version. How often is it the first version is usually the best for you? I'll say the first version is often, if it's not the best, it's very instructive and holds a magic in it that is to be retained no matter what else changes. You know, a big part of it is just not screwing up what's good.

44:57It's not messing it up. No, there are all these stories of, you know, the demos being better than the album. It's easy to not know why something is good. You know, you make a demo and you think, okay, now when I get the professional musicians to play it, it's going to be great. It's going to be that much better. Maybe yes, maybe no. We don't know. We never know. We never know what's going to happen when we do anything. So to stay neutral and to keep every iteration along the way and be willing to look back after you just spent months refining something to then say, you know what? It was better three months ago.

45:34Throw that all away. Wow.

45:40What was the book that really inspired you the most? The Science of Getting Rich by Wallace Waddles. Yeah, that's a good one. I mean, not only because it's like this big because I'm super impatient, but I mean, it's super cryptic. It's like it's all about the universe being a thinking stuff. And when you impress your thoughts into the thinking stuff, it becomes real and material world. And I just I just it really, really, really spoke to me. I've read it hundreds of times. Yes. Yeah. What was the biggest takeaway from that book? oh I'm so happy you asked because I'm talking about this line all the time is to think what you want to think is to think the truth regardless of appearances so this is everything right so mindset is everything so regardless of appearances regardless of the fact that I'm living in a garage in an LA driving a car with no grill like those are the appearances but to think what you want and I think the want is so key too because that's your that's your authenticity that's not like thinking what other people think you should do and how you should live your life, to think what you want, the purpose that you were put on planet Earth to live out, that's the truth.

46:48That is the truth. So your desires are the truth, not what's physically around you. Wow. So how do we know that we are in harmony and congruency with our desires? That it's for something not just selfish and self-serving by itself or ego-driven, but more, I don't know, driven by something greater. You know, because if someone says, well, I want to make a lot of money or I want to make$100 ,000 in a year or$500 ,000 or whatever it is or millions, how do we line up our desires with our authentic selves so that we don't hurt ourselves in the process of making money or it become overwhelming, daunting or draining?

47:32I think you always come back to, is it fun? does it give me energy or deplete my energy and does it have meaning those are the three things that i'm really living my life by these days and uh i think that if you're in alignment with those three things and other things certainly but those are sort of my big three is it fun does it give me energy and does it give me meaning yeah and is it meaningful yeah is it meaningful yeah i like that yeah and where were you at 39 doing things that weren't fun they drained your energy and Yeah. You're giving meaning? Yeah, pretty much. I mean, I was a freelance writer hustling my butt off.

48:11And then like when I really did the math, I was like the amount of time I spent hustling for this gig and they don't pay that well, like magazine articles. Come on. I was making like, I was probably losing money, quite frankly. So yeah, no, there was, there was none of that. It was not fun. It was exhausting. It had some meaning, but you got to get all three, you know? Yeah. Or at least start working towards it because you may not be able to at this season. but you got to focus on, can I get one? Can I get one? And is it leading in the direction of something that is fun, that is going to give me energy and has meaning?

48:42Because you're right. Like when you're building a company or when you're doing something like it is exhausting. And, but if it's still exciting and fun and has meaning, then yeah, yeah. It doesn't get to be a picnic all the time. When was the biggest aha moment for you then? Like, was it after you made a certain amount of money or a client paid you something? Or was it just the feeling you had, like releasing all of it in the process of working? Like when was that moment where you're like, I'm actually emotionally and mentally free around the idea of money? Oh, interesting. Maybe I'm not abundant of money.

49:17No, I will tell you. No, I actually did. And I did put it in You Are a Badass. I put it in one of them. It was when I had, oh my God, it was such a cool moment. So because money is currency and currency is energy, right? So we're really going to get woo woo with the money, like really shifting the mindset around money. And I, and bring me back to my story. If I go off on a tangent, cause I'm about to go on off on a tangent and I want to work, but I, um, money is currency and currency is energy. Yes. Money is currency. Currency is energy. And I've had so many clients that have told me, and it's happened to me too, where they manifest when they get into the meditation and they start to raise their frequency and they focus on the amount, the exact amount comes in from outer space that you didn't even think of.

49:59And so my story is around that where I was working with my coach and we were really going to shift my money reality. And so she's like, you know, what amount of money would be really great for you to make right now? Like, what would have a lot of meaning? And I was like,$10 ,000 because I'm$10 ,000 in debt on my credit card. And I hate being in debt. She's like, perfect. And so she's like, okay, so how soon are you going to make it? And she goes, you know, like about a week, two weeks. Cause I, you know, and I was at time making like 30 grand a year. I was like, my God, if I made 10 ,000 in a week, that would be incredible.

50:28And I was like, but you know what? I've got to do it in two days because I know myself and I won't keep myself in that frequency. Like I'll lose steam and I'll decide that like, yeah, it's not, I can't do it or whatever. Like I knew that the stuff would start creeping back in. So I was like, all right, 10 grand in two days. Just like, great. Okay. So how are you going to do it? And at the time I had this little online coaching business that I had just started coaching writers. And I said, I'll get three private clients, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. So then we're, you know, putting all the pieces in place.

50:56And then she's like, okay, and is there anything else? And I was like, well, you know, there was this guy that I was coaching years ago. He was my first private client. I was charging him like 50 bucks an hour. And I was like, I could also call him and see if he wants to work with me again. And she's like, okay, great. And we're still on the phone. And I checked my email and he has written me. I have not thought of this manner communicated with him in years. Email, he's like, are you still coaching? Can you help me? When can we start? Wow. And so she's like, okay, here's what we're going to do.

51:29We're going to put together a $10 ,000 package for him and you're going to sell it to him right now. Holy cow. I know. And I was like,$10 ,000. I was charging him 50 bucks an hour. And I really adore him. He's such a special person. And I felt like a greedy pig, blah, blah, blah, all the things, fraud complex gigantic imposter syndrome oh beyond beyond and so we she's like and what we'll do is we'll put together a$15 ,000 package and a 10 so the 10 looks cheap and I was like I can't do 15 she's like all right 12 pain in my ass I did a 12 sent it to him and literally wanted to throw up I was just like if he I because I really cared about this guy he bought the 12 holy cow I know I know exactly I know well here's the thing you know it's not like you were charging him 12 ,000 an hour obviously you created a position and packaging of services that would over deliver that would serve him a big way I worked with him for five years after that exactly yeah yeah yeah so it's not like I'm just going to charge some number and give very little oh no you made sure that the value was there totally how did you learn to package and position your value to be able to charge for what you wanted.

52:40My coach helped me put it all together, but then I had to rise to that frequency. And I'll tell you, when you're charging something that scares the a** out of you, you show up with your A plus game. And he did too. It was a lot for him too. We knocked it out of the park. Because you pay attention to what you pay for. Yes. Yes. Yeah. Totally. You'll rise the occasion. I got to focus. Yes. I got to give. I got to show up on time. I got to deliver the results on time. Absolutely. Give my best here. Yep. Interesting. So now here's, I'm curious about the next thing. Was that everything to the story first off?

53:11I want to make sure I get it. Okay. Money is currency and currency is energy. I'm curious about the next thing. So once this happened and you sold a$12 ,000 package and you were like, this is crazy. And this is more money than I've ever made in my life, essentially in two days, did you fall back at any point or did you stay focused? Oh, interesting. Because sometimes people get an opportunity and they excited and then, well, I tried it again and it didn't work. So maybe this is a fluke. Maybe this was a one time and the thermometer goes back down to what they're comfortable and familiar with. Very common.

53:45Very common. I did not, but only because I continued to get coaching and I got bigger and bigger and bigger packages. I mean, I was paying six figures by the end. A hundred grand for like a year of coaching? Wow. So I just, because I knew myself, I was like, I am rickety in this whole sort of wealth consciousness department. So I knew that I had, it's like getting a personal trainer, right? So I just kept investing in the coaching and now I'm good, but I do still have to work at it. I mean... It's different levels. It's different levels, you know? You feel comfortable at this level, but if you want to break through...

54:17Exactly. Exactly. You do something you've never done, it means you've got to have a different frequency still, right? Exactly. You got, you know, yep. Oh, there's always more growth to be had. Do you feel like you're kind of at like a block right now? Because again, you've sold, you know, I don't know, five or 10 million copies of your books. You've got a coaching program, you've got all these core success, financial freedom, all these different things. But is there like a level you've reached that you feel like, okay, well, can I break through this? This is so much now. And I feel abundant, but could you break through?

54:47If I want, if I could decide what I want the next thing to be yet, I'm still in that sort of incubation period of like, what would be fun? Give me energy and that meaning. I'm getting there. Like, I definitely feel like I'm getting there and I'm doing a lot of things that meet those requirements in the meantime, but it's not the big. What's your biggest fear or insecurity around money right now? That I don't know what to do with it when I make it. I'm good at making it. My bookkeeper called me one day and she's like, would you please just open a savings account at your bank? Because I had like a million dollars in my checking account.

55:22This was a while ago. I finally got my I've hired financial plan. I've hired people who are grownups who know what they're doing with money, but I'm teaching myself about it, but I find it boring. I find investing boring and confusing and out of my league. So luckily there are amazing people who know what they're doing. So I have finally gotten that team together. Gotcha. And there is a little tiny part of me, if I gave it any attention, that is a little scared it's all going to go away. Really? Yeah. But it's not that bad and I probably should not even speak it out loud. Right, right, right. You're being honest about it.

55:56I think there's one thing about speaking it out loud so it doesn't happen, but another thing about saying it so it doesn't have power for you. Right. Yeah. Okay. We'll take that version. If you're afraid of it, you're afraid to have the conversation around money. Yeah. I'm all a believer, don't speak into something and it's this as you don't want to happen. Yeah. But I think when I started talking about my fears and my shame and my insecurity, it actually felt like the poison was coming out of me. And now I can see it outside of me, or I could have a conversation with it as opposed to it being in me and afraid to talk about.

56:27Right. And then I could get coaching about it. Right. And then I could, okay, let me create a game plan. Okay, well, I'm afraid of it, but now I have a coach to help me, you know, invest it the right way and whatever I need to do. Yeah. You know, so. Yeah. As opposed to ignoring it and just, I hope I don't lose it, but I'm not going to speak about it. Right. That's a good point. That is a good point. Okay. I'll tell you another one. What's the other one? What's the other one? The other one is that I'm going to make too much of it and I won't, and it is, it's kind like the same as the first one but I won't know what to do with it like I'm scared of it coming in too fast and too much because it's gonna bury me alive almost yeah I know I know and holy so I bury me alive kind of yes why would it bury why would money bury you alive just tell it you what I well this is the interesting thing Jen I think it's powerful that you're talking about this because there's different levels of insecurities or fears at the stages of money we make and when When I was broke on my sister's couch, I had a lot of fear and insecurity and uncertainty of the future.

57:30And then I remember one day I made$6 ,200 in an hour doing like a live webinar selling a program. This is in 2009. Okay. While there was like courses and webinars, all this stuff. And I go, I'm the richest man in the world with$6 ,200. Now I had to split that with the person who promoted this training for me, but I still felt like$3 ,100 in an hour. I go, I could do this every day for the rest of my life, right? Because I was sleeping on my sister's couch. Yeah. But there was still, I'd never made six figures. And so there was still a challenge, like, how do I do this? And how do I manage it? And I understand it.

58:04And now taxes, what? All my money's gone from, I just made money. I have zero again. And this fear of like this tax thing. And then you get to the next level, the next level, the next level. And I just think there's different challenges or things we get to overcome at every level of money as well. Sure. Yes. You know what I mean? New level, new devil, right? Is that right? Yeah. So one of the fears is will the money bury me alive? Yeah. Why do you think that is? Oh, gosh. Why do I think that is? I think it's my insecurity about not knowing what to do with it. When I had very little of it, I could manage it, right?

58:38That was easy. And then as I started getting more and more, and so I do have pieces in place, but I've opened, I've hired a new financial team so I can make, like build the nest and it will come. Because I was like, if I don't take care of this, I will literally block it. I will energetically block it if I'm scared of it coming in and think it's going to bury me alive. That is not an abundant mindset. I just created the nest. So now bring it on, universe. Right, right. So now you have a foundation for it to come in. Yeah. So it's not scary anymore because I know where it's going to go. But I realized that.

59:14I was just like, wow, I am kind of scared of it coming in too much. I know. It's interesting, isn't it yeah i think it's fascinating i think we all get to experience at different levels how to break through otherwise wouldn't be interesting if it was just i don't know there's no obstacle what do you think are the key things that abundant mindset people around money do differently than scarcity mindset people around money if you had to say three or five kind of key things they They appreciate it, as you said. That is a biggie. They appreciate it and they speak about it as they love it. They're not weird about it.

59:58They're also generous with it because when you pinch yourself off from giving, that is sort of a subconscious way of saying there's not enough to go around and it's not going to come. I'm not in the flow. So when you don't give generously, it's because you're scared that it's not going to come in anymore. They take risks. You know, you got to take risks. You are where you are because you've been doing what you've been doing. So if you want to change your life, you've got to do stuff you've never done. What else? Wealthy people. They learn about money. Like you focus on money. Like that was such a big thing for me too.

1:00:31Like when I was broke, I never wanted to think about money, right? I was all about writing songs and, you know, doing much, you know, more noble things. Sure, sure. But then, but when you're broke, all you think about is money. Like I don't really think about money that much now that I have it. But every single decision you make when you're broke is about - Well, I have enough to pay for this. Can I afford it? What happens if I don't have you? Right. You wake up first thing in the morning in a panic because you've got to pay your bills. So you're always thinking about money. So it is really just sort of getting in the flow with that and just being on good terms with it and focusing on it.

1:01:04And how are you going to make it? Like being realistic about your income streams. And if you want to make it, you've got to coax it in. Right, right. Yeah. I'm curious about this. Okay, you're a starving artist. You wanted to do noble things, which about art and making art and all these different things. What would have happened if someone would have said, Jen, you know what? I love that you're an artist. I love that you have this, you know, passion for art and you want to keep doing this. And this is the way you've been for 40 years. And we don't want you to change. Here's a hundred grand a year for the rest of your life.

1:01:42don't worry about money up to a hundred grand what would that have done to you if someone would have given you a hundred grand a year and you would have just been like okay i'm gonna write and do whatever i want and how do you think it would have been mentally emotionally spiritually versus you having to risk emotionally mentally yeah you getting to heal let go overcome right challenge yourself into asking for money into becoming something greater than that limiting belief. What do you think, what do you think it'd be now? Probably would have spent it on beer, honestly, back in those days. Yeah.

1:02:16Yeah. I mean, I wasn't, you, you're absolutely right. It's an, it's an, it's a frequency, you know, it's like, it's like, uh, I don't know. I mean, I always, I always had, I guess I'm going to say gall, that's not the right word, but I did, I did do a lot of stuff that was pretty edgy and I pushed the envelope a lot. So I may have gotten there, but I don't think it would have been as exciting as it was to do it myself. You know, there really is. You do grow. And they say, you know, starting your own business is the best personal development course you can probably do, because all your stuff comes up, right?

1:02:55All of it. Relationship training, it's leadership training, it's inner child training, everything. Everything. Totally. Every button is pushed. Totally. So it wouldn't have been as satisfying, I don't think. I think I still would have done it though because that is kind of my personality. When I'm ready to change, I'm ready to change and I do it. Yeah, yeah. So, but I think it wouldn't have been as glorious and I probably wouldn't have written URBAT, which totally changed my entire life. So. It changed yours, but it also changed other people's lives. Yes. So it's who you become, the lessons you learn, the wisdom you have.

1:03:24Yes. To then be able to be of service and teach. Yeah. From your own experience. Exactly. Yeah. The book about me getting a hundred grand a year just for being would not be that interesting to people. Right. Yeah. Right. That's interesting. Yeah. What has been the biggest lesson in the last 10 years? Because that was 10 years ago when you wrote You Are a Badass, right? And you've written two or three books since then, I believe. What has been the biggest lesson, three books since then? Yeah. What has been the biggest lesson in 10 years since You Are a Badass to now? Personally, physically, and financially.

1:04:00Oh, man. Let me think. Okay. The biggest lessons since I wrote you are about... Because when you get more money, more impact, more celebrity, fame in an industry, people change around you. Some people don't, some people do. You get to make different choices with your health, in positive or negative. You have more abundance to do bad things or good things. And you get to see how you show up emotionally, spiritually as well. Yeah, that's such an interesting question. You know, I definitely feel like since it came out and has had the success, you know, that I've gotten better and better. It really.

1:04:43This sounds cold, but like not caring what other people think about me like that is something that I'm really dedicated to right now, where it's like. The one star reviews and the five star reviews, you know, it's like, believe me, I'm so grateful anybody reads the book, but five star reviews are the real dangerous ones, right? where you're just like, I'm so cool. People think I'm funny and smart. You know, really getting good inside, like just being like, it doesn't matter as long as I think it's good. And I think it's funny. And I think it's helpful. That's it. And so that has been really important to me because it is weird.

1:05:16I mean, I'm sure you too, like people know who you are. And it's like, it's, it's a little uncomfortable sometimes. I mean, it's great too. Like I love meeting my readers, but it's just like, I can't get too wrapped up in their opinion of me because it's about my opinion of me. So that's been a really big one. So not letting the opinions of others be the opinions of you about you. Right. Yeah. Interesting. This really coming through. The high hype and the low low. Yeah, definitely. Because you hear a lot about the low lows, like don't focus on the criticism, but you really got to watch it with the five star stuff too.

1:05:48That's interesting. Yeah. Because then, because then if it goes away, you're screwed, right? You're totally screwed. I mean, that's why so many celebrities wind up in rehab, you know, especially if you, I always think about this too that I'm so glad for me anyway that it started when I was older if I was 20 oh man I was getting all these accolades I would be such an idiot I know like no ways oh I'm really great I'm so grateful for all of it my god um and that's personally what about next lesson um financially financially um I guess I I love giving money away like I didn't I really honestly never thought I was that generous of a person but i am but so i'm very happy to find that out about myself because i didn't really think that i was but also that i um i was just making fun of this this morning with a friend of mine that i'm still kind of cheap with myself in ways like i'm not great at like i mean i have a nice house i have a nice car i certainly spend plenty of money on myself but i can just be like i'm not good at being rich and like getting room service and like Like spending, I'm still kind of, you know, the Italian immigrant's daughter who sort of pays attention.

1:06:59So not that that's bad, but... It's interesting. I have a little bit of that in me. Although in the last couple of years, I've started to learn how to take care of me with travel and food and convenience and saving time. Convenience. Whereas for, I don't know, the first five years of my business, I was making money, right? It's not like it didn't have money, but I was so afraid to lose it also. I was just stacking it. Every time I travel, I would try to find who do I know in this town that I can sleep on their couch. Yeah. Isn't it funny? Because I was like, I'm not going to pay$200 a night for a room.

1:07:32What are you talking about? I can use that money and I can put it somewhere else. Yeah. And I was always like, how do I just get on the cheapest bus fare? Right. How do I get the middle backseat on Southwest? How do I get the$39 seat and just sit there for six hours in the middle? and just crammed as opposed to convenience and saving time and having my health optimized and using it to do those things. But I was afraid to lose it. So it was just work, work, work to make it, but I was afraid to lose it for a while. Yeah. And also like the value, like I still, and I make myself too, but I hate paying for parking.

1:08:09I would rather drive, and we're talking like$2 in a meter. Like I'm so weird about that. I'm like - You'd rather roll on the block five times just try to find a free spot. Yes, waste gas, waste my time. Like, it's so stupid. But I and I crack up like, but I also this thing where like I'll spend 60 grand to put solar on my house, but I won't spend$15 on a wooden spoon. Like, I'm just kind of funny catching yourself where you're. Well, I think there's a there's a there's a power in being mindful with your money and being I would call it frugal, I guess, maybe in certain ways, but abundant in other ways.

1:08:42Yeah. Right. It's like be abundant in certain ways, but don't just overspend on everything because you have the money. Yeah, I guess. I know. So mindful of certain things, you know, at whatever level you're at, too, you know, like when you don't have money, you also don't want to be pinched off and stingy with it. Like it really is about this isn't just, you know, two people with money talking about it. It really is about figuring out where you're at and how to stay in that abundance mindset and in the flow and leaving an extra dollar when you tip or whatever, you know, but just really catching yourself when you're pinching it off.

1:09:15because it doesn't matter how much we're talking about, but it's that pinching off. If money is currency and currency is energy and you're pinching it off, that is not going to do well for you. Blocking it. What was the big lesson about relationships in the last 10 years? Whether it be friend, colleague, intimate relationship. Yeah, you know that people are still really uncomfortable with money. And I do feel like it's being of service to talk about it freely and openly and joyfully. And it totally turns people off all the time and close friends. Absolutely. And, but taking a stand and doing it anyway.

1:09:53And really like, I kind of do have to, I have to be a little careful because it can be braggy. But again, like if I lost a hundred pounds and I was telling you about losing a hundred pounds, people would be happy for you. This is the same kind of thing. Like it's something that really is an achievement that helps me be healthy and happy. And why shouldn't I talk about it? And the fact that you're uncomfortable with it doesn't mean I shouldn't talk about it and sink down to your level. Right. So that's been interesting. And I have lost friends over that. Absolutely. Wow. It's interesting because we'll see, you know, on social media, these physical transformations of people.

1:10:29Here was me six months ago. Here's me now. Yeah. And a lot of, you'll see a lot of people celebrating that, right? Like, congratulations, it's amazing. It's the encouragement. It's like, look what I was able to do. And I'm so proud of myself. And I wish more people would do that around money too. Look, like I was$30 ,000 in debt and look at my bank statement now. Like I'm debt free and I've got a thousand bucks in the bank. You know, whatever it is. And I think Dave Ramsey celebrates that for people in his, you know, kind of community where it's like when they get out of debt, he brings them on the radio show and they kind of announce it.

1:10:59But I don't see this on social media that much. Because that's a safe space. Because everybody who's listening to his show is drink the Kool-Aid. Yeah. Yeah. You do it in the public space. You are going down. Yeah. Why is that? I don't really know. I don't know. I think about this too. Like, how did that all get started? When did it become such a dirty thing? It has, I'm sure it has to do with some kind of control. Like some people wanted to control something. So. Right. I'm curious about, you know, if you're down to go there about intimate relationships, how has making money impacted you intimately in relationship?

1:11:31I am definitely, that is my Achilles heel right now. So that, and it's been a little weird for me because being a very, I have stories around being a very successful woman and how that's not so feminine and how, yeah, there's a lot of stuff on that. So I'm, that's the, that's the new frontier, which I'm super psyched about. Figuring it out. Yeah. What do you feel like is the biggest struggle around that? You know, is it... My own beliefs around it. Totally. Come on now. I know all this. It's all the same thing, you know, but that's a deep one. And it's kind of a new one, you know, because I haven't been a successful woman for a long time.

1:12:12And so it's interesting. Wow. Yeah. So is this like, you know, people just are intimidated by you because you have money or What is that? That's what I think. Because men are supposed to be the providers and supposed to, you know, yeah, be the providers and be more successful. And I don't really even care about that, you know. But I do care about somebody being at the same level of me spiritually and sort of just, you know, just with what they're into and stuff like that. So that's really important to me. Interesting. Yeah. Because that might be a block for some women. And like, if I make more money, will I be in a great intimate relationship if I make more than my partner, right?

1:12:54Well, the way that it's set up anyway, that is sort of it, you know, that men and, you know, so I just got to find a guy who's either as, who's got really good wealth consciousness, who's as successful, who's totally out there. But it's my own story. It's always your own story. Yeah. What would you coach another woman? Who says the same thing. Or who's like, they've got a successful growing business, or maybe they're making a million dollars a year in their business or more. Yeah. And they're like, man, I've been struggling because I haven't found a guy who's comfortable with me making this much.

1:13:29They feel like they can't add as much value to the relationship. Right. What would you say to that? Well, of course, Lewis, I have had that client because the second you have an issue, that client shows up to... I don't know if you like every time because I'm doing this group coaching course. And oh, yeah, like plenty of people in that group ask me the very questions. So what do you say? It's super easy when it's the end. Well, I mean, I know the answer. But am I like really going to live it is watch your thoughts. What are you believing about it? What have you decided is true about you, about your environment, about the way the world works?

1:14:02Like it's all your thoughts. Like if you keep harping on it's hard. He's not out there. I'm to this. I'm to that. Then that is the truth. That's what you'll manifest or attract in here. That, you know, to think what you want to think is to think the truth. That's true. Yeah, so. It's interesting because my girlfriend, I was telling you about her a little bit before, she's extremely successful in what she does. She makes a lot of good money. And I celebrate it. I'm like, awesome. For me, it feels great to have someone who's more, you know, energetically aligned or like more of an equal match. even though my business does more than her business, but she's making a killing, right, in her own way.

1:14:44And I'm excited for her. And it doesn't make me feel like I'm not able to provide as much with her making good money also. For me, it doesn't affect that within me. But maybe 10, 15 years ago, it would have. Maybe I would have felt insecure or not enough because I hadn't worked on my stuff. So I think it's just finding someone who's in alignment, who's a good match emotionally, spiritually, psychologically as well, who's done the work and doesn't find it intimidating. I find it inspiring. I'm like, wow. And here's the interesting thing for me, not to go off on this too much, but for me, something switched in the last five to eight years where I had this kind of morbid thought where I said, okay, if I'm with a partner and I don't feel like she can be resourceful and I die, can she take care of my kids financially.

1:15:34It was kind of a morbid thought, but I was like, huh. And I struggled in the previous relationships that I was in thinking, would they be able to financially figure it out? If they didn't remarry, if they didn't find another man to support them financially, if their parents didn't fund them, whatever happened, if we had kids, I died, could they financially be resourceful and do things that would make our kids proud of them? You know what I mean? And so, and that's my partner now. So it's like, she is financially resourceful and creative enough to generate money if she needed to. But I don't need her to make me more.

1:16:14You know what I mean? So anyway, something to think about there. But, um, so that's one of your blocks right now, one of your, your challenges. A temporary block. Yeah. You're releasing the block very quickly. Yes. I'm just airing all the laundry here. I love it. When I leave this room that it's all, it all stays here. Exactly. We'll open the window so it goes somewhere else. Please get a fan. What is the question you get asked by your readers the most that you wish they truly could hear and believe the answer to? Oh, so many. Well, the one that I said about what do you do when the people closest to you don't support you.

1:16:53Another one is how do you keep the motivation? And like, you know, we go to these seminars, we read books, we listen to the podcast and we're all raring to go. And then a month later, you go back and you'll pass. Yeah. So how do you stay motivated on your vision and on your growth journey? Well, I call it going to the spiritual gym and you've got to have a spiritual gym practice because you do not get to work out physically and then stop going to the gym once you're in shape. So just because you got in shape at the seminar or listen to the podcast or whatever, you don't get to stop doing stuff.

1:17:27So, and it doesn't, and you know, it was like, oh, I'm working so hard to start my business. I don't want to do anything. So it's like, it can be 20 minutes. You know, you working out for 20 minutes a day can do a lot of great things. So it's like spiritual gym workout, meditate for 15, read a self-help book for five. Like what music are you listening to? Who are you hanging out with? What makes you feel like you could flip over a car? Like what are those things? And do them every single solitary day for 20 minutes. It's not that big a whoop-de-doo. You know, when you think about that, it's going to change your entire life, you know, so and take it as seriously as anything else, because that work will make everything else that you're taking seriously and trying to achieve so much easier.

1:18:09And, you know, I'm giving a lot of talks right now. And the thing that I'm just so excited and I'm so excited to be speaking right now, too, because it reminds me it's my spiritual gym, right? Like we all need it. So, but the thing about, because we are spiritual creatures having a physical experience, right? And if you, and like, instead of just giving it lip service and talking, yeah, yeah, yeah, I know that. But think about it. We are the universal intelligence that created everything that is. We are. Our thoughts are universal intelligence, the stuff that created everything that is. Why are we not more stuck up?

1:18:45Why are we not feeling so powerful all of the time? If we're really going to believe it, if we're really going to go steroids on woo woo and go there and really like if you thought about that all day long about your thoughts being, you know, when you're in alignment, not the garbage thoughts that you think. But when you get quiet and you tap into your inner yippee skippy, as I like to call it, and you're there and you're in the flow, it's like it's so exciting. I hope you enjoyed today's episode and it inspired you on your journey towards greatness. Make sure to check out the show notes in the description for a full rundown of today's episode with all the important links.

1:19:27And if you want weekly exclusive bonus episodes with me personally, as well as ad-free listening, then make sure to subscribe to our Greatness Plus channel exclusively on Apple Podcasts. Share this with a friend on social media and leave us a review on Apple Podcasts as well. Let me know what you enjoyed about this episode in that review. I really love hearing feedback from you and it helps us figure out how we can support and serve you moving forward. And I want to remind you if no one has told you lately that you are loved, you are worthy and you matter. And now it's time to go out there and do something great.