3 SECRETS To Unlocking INNER PEACE (Find Your Higher Purpose Today!)

0:00Your positive mindset itself creates such a positive vibration around you and helps other people. Absolutely. You can only give what you have. Nobody expects you to give what you don't have. But whatever you have, you can definitely share with others. Absolutely. Yeah. Welcome to the School of Greatness. My name is Lewis Howes, a former pro athlete turned lifestyle entrepreneur. And each week we bring you an inspiring person or message to help you discover how to unlock your inner greatness. Thanks for spending some time with me today. Now let the class begin.

0:41welcome to this special masterclass we brought some of the top experts in the world to help you unlock the power of your life through this specific theme today it's going to be powerful so let's go ahead and dive in

0:59what about certain people that maybe don't feel like they're receiving anything in life they're not receiving any gifts or support, they're struggling, and they don't feel like they have anything to give. They really feel like, I'm in lack, I don't have anything to give as well. How can they turn that situation into joy and happiness? My dear, you can at least give a smile. Right. I agree. You can say a few nice words to people of comfort. Can't you smile? What is big in just smiling when everything is okay when things are falling apart if you can stand up and smile I know I can manage I know things will pass that smile that positive vibration from you amidst all the troubled water itself is a hope your positive mindset itself creates such a positive vibration around you and helps other people absolutely so you don't have to be giving something if you don't have, you can only give what you have.

2:06Nobody expects you to give what you don't have. But whatever you have, you can definitely share with others. Absolutely, yeah. This is what we see in some of the poor communities. They may have very little, but they share with others. Right. And they feel a lot of love and joy and community and connection. Community and fulfillment. Correct, correct. How does someone develop an abundant mindset, something where they believe that abundance of love and joy and opportunities can come to them versus staying stuck in a limit of what they're capable of creating or achieving? One should, first of all, become aware of the reality in the world.

2:57Get out of our little well that we are into and see the ocean of humanity, where it is, and compare with that and you'll see you'll be grateful. you are at least much better than so many people who don't even have the basic things that you have that itself will give you a breathing space see feel better about yourself number one second

3:32again here I would say meditation will help one to get out of grief and sense of lack You know, it's just a state of mind. You can continue to feel like even if you're a billionaire. It's true. It can continue with you forever in your life. So here meditation can bring that inner sense of abundance. And when you have that inner sense of abundance, I tell you, abundance will start flowing to you from outside as well. What should that feeling be inside of us in order to feel abundant? What does that feeling look like, experience? Yes. There should be this way. Your feelings are feeling, just be with it.

4:25Those feelings come because you have certain misconceptions in your mind, wrong notions in your mind, or stress, too much stress, then everything appears to be very bleak. Yes. And you don't enjoy even simple things. you know so I feel stress is the biggest enemy of mankind because stress destroys the relationship it destroys your own peace of mind your health your health your communication goes for a toss you react more but it seems so hard for people to let go of stress to just let go of it because nobody taught them how to get out of this. Interesting. Neither at school nor at home. No one teaches us how we can be free from stress.

5:22We're seeing how to be stressful but not how to get out of stress. Get out of stress. We see other people stressed and we're mimicking that but not how to be peaceful. Yeah. This education is missing. That is where I feel it's very important. Now, intellectually, you know, oh, I shouldn't be upset. I shouldn't be annoyed. Sudarshan, lose my temper. All this intellectually, you know, as a concept, you know, you understand all that. But in practical life, it doesn't seem to become a reality. It doesn't translate into reality. Your thoughts are different. Your actions are different. This is where the breathing techniques and Sudarshan, Kriya, Sky techniques all come so handy.

6:09Yes. Because it helps when it gives tools and technique for people to, you know, just let go of those and feel the freshness from within. How often do you feel stressed or angry today with all the wisdom that you have? Do you ever feel stressed or angry? Do I look stressed? Not right now. Do you ever have a moment since I were like, I don't like that person did this thing or said this or does it ever like just a little bit? and then you go back to your... It will be so hard to believe, but it is the truth that I don't get this at all. That's got to feel amazing. It's got to feel peaceful then.

6:51How much does the ability of someone needing to learn to heal support them in overcoming stress? If they still have emotional or physical wounds from the past or memories from the past that hurt them. That need to be healed. and again here this will help you to heal your breathing technique meditation helps you to just come out of it and that's what we have been doing in this country for all the war veterans you know they have tried all psychological things and they have seen doctors and PTSD syndromes 8000 of war veterans in America alone have undergone this program programs, Healing Breath Workshop.

7:38Wow. And you must hear their experiences. It's so heartwarming. The mothers and the wives of those people, they've said, we got our son back. These same war veterans who just hide in their basement or not have any family life. And that the trauma of war wounds. Oh, my gosh. The psychological wounds they had undergone, moral wounds, were very difficult to heal. But just in a few days' time, three, four days' time, they're completely on. Wow. So a gentleman even made a movie out of it. Almost Sunrise is a movie. They made it on our technique, how this has helped many war veterans. It's a very interesting movie.

8:31I feel like it's hard to be peaceful if we haven't learned to heal. It's hard to not react and be stressed if there's still a wound inside of us. Absolutely, absolutely right. That is where wisdom combined with techniques would help them to get taught. Right. Wisdom techniques and integrating these techniques consistently. Yeah. And I'm not saying, oh, you have to practice for a long time, then you will find the effect. No. Within a few days, within a few sittings, three, four sittings, you can find the chain. Yes. The healing is so fast. Yes. So at some point, sometime, we even call this healing breath workshop when we started.

9:15But then, healing breath means its scope is very limited only for those who need. But many don't even realize they need these exercises to be more happier. Right. So we change it into happiness program. That's good. I like it. Yeah, I like that. You talked about the education system and what we aren't teaching our kids at home and in schools. If you could require, in a hypothetical world, if you could ask that teachers or schools teach only three things to support the youth, what would those three lessons be? teach them how they can manage their emotions number one number two we have to teach them how they can accept others and how to create a very cordial atmosphere make more new friends in their schools and colleges wherever they are third thing is to be resilient You know, failures come in life.

10:29You know, you get fights. You get into some unpleasant situations. And how to snap out of it without hanging on to it in your mind and worrying about it. Going along with that, I think those are beautiful. Going along with that, I believe one of the biggest fears for people is the fear of rejection. the fear of other people's opinions and rejection how does someone learn to be okay with others rejecting them with nasty comments online with people saying no to them over and over how does someone learn to still love and appreciate themselves in the face of rejection you need inner strength for that that's where the journey within will help you a lot yeah you need inner strength to be able to be solid and not worry about what others say, not to be football of others' opinion.

11:29For that, you need that inner strength. It's a gradual growth. You can't say it can happen right tomorrow after listening to our podcast. No. For that, they need to do a little bit of meditation, a little bit of wisdom, and all rest will be the journey with it. Yeah, for sure. But why do you think people hold on to the opinions of others so much? Why do we care so much about? Because you don't have a bigger context about life. You don't see all the thoughts, all the opinions of people are changing, including your own. You have some opinion about somebody and then it just changed very fast or, you know, in a few days or in a few months, right?

12:15Your opinions do change. So others, you must give others also the freedom to change their opinions. It's true. And we don't have to think their opinion is... Is right. Is etched in stone and same all the time. It's just a ripple on the surface of water. Yes. And you have no control over that. That's true. And the bigger context to your life, again, and more being conscious of the different treasure or wealth that you have, the beautiful qualities you possess as a human being, will help you to overcome those things. Broadening your perspective about life. Yes, yes. I've heard you talk about, you know, we have so many thoughts every single day in our minds, right?

13:12Thousands, millions of thoughts a day. What are the thoughts that we should be trying to focus on the most consistently when we have a negative thought? How can we replace it with something else? I feel you shouldn't fight with any thoughts. The more you resist, the more those thoughts will come to you. There is a skill in dealing with the thought, turning the negative into positive. That skill is what meditation is all of. And if you are stressed however you struggle to get rid of negative thoughts, it is impossible for you to get rid of them. if you don't get rid of stress and try to only manage the thought it is not going to work root cause of all this negativity is the stress you get rid of stress and you will see naturally you will have only positive right and if you start to heal you'll start to get rid of the stress absolutely yeah is it possible to be happy and hurt at the same time have like a wound emotionally or psychologically or physically?

14:23Is it possible to be happy at the same time that you're dealing with this hurt? Maybe partially. There could be some more. But to be really totally happy, you have to get rid of the wounds. The wounds. And I don't see it as impossible. Right. I see it as very much possible, even if they take a little bit of inner journey, make that inner journey meditate a little bit have a broader context to life and serve in society in whatever capacity they can What do you think people struggle with the most that you've seen over the last few months in society? Is it dealing with... Post-pandemic what I see is there is aggression on one side and depression on the other side.

15:23People are swinging between these two extremes. At the drop of a hat, people lose their tempo and become so aggressive on one side. On the other side, there is depression and suicidal tendencies and feeling bad about themselves. This is also prevalent. and both I feel is not good for the health of a society, of an individual. So we need to get rid of these two extremities. What's the root cause of aggression and depression? Again, lack of robust mental health.

16:06And this is the talk of the town everywhere, mental health, we talk about it. But we are not thinking about remedies which are time-tested, like breathing, meditation, yoga, and all these things. Nature. Nature walk. And we are only thinking about what type of medication we can stuff ourselves with, and steroids that you take, and then you bloat yourself even more. and I think the lifestyle changes really to adopt to ourselves. Yeah. Why are people so influenced on these things or on things that really don't matter about the journey within? Fancy things, superficial things, you know, more and more and more.

16:56Why are people so focused on these things in life versus feeling peaceful and happy? See, nature of mind is to wanting something new. Mind always goes for something new. Right. And fashion and more. But heart always longs for something old. You take pride in an old friend, not in a new friend. Right. and you take pride in having the latest model of car or a computer or a watch right that that's the latest thing that the mind wants so life is like that life is a combination of old and new like the roots are old but the shoots come new right and we have to balance them and if you don't attend to the roots at all there is no lie that's true how do you balance that in your life by having the mission that you're on and dealing with everything else that's happening life is already balanced you don't have to make struggle make any you know attempt to balance it it's it's been like this for me right because I want nothing for myself What's that?

18:19I want nothing for myself. Right. I'm here to cave and whatever I have. Yeah. That's it. We've all desensitized ourselves too much to what pain feels like. So do you think when we're going through an experience of pain or suffering or whatever, we're going through depression, that we should feel the feelings fully? Or how should we experience that time? and how long should we be in that pain before we're like, you know what? Enough is enough. Let's get out of this crap and start thinking positively and move forward. Very good point. Well, once again, there is that symbol of the 40 years in the desert, the three days between the crucifixion and the resurrection.

19:00And I saw this. I've seen this in my life. The congressional campaign was an example, but I've had other times. If you're honest, when you really take a look at yourself, this is the truth. Let's say you know that I went through something painful. and you say, hey, Marianne, I'm really sorry. I heard about your divorce or I heard about your banquet, whatever. And I'm like, thanks so much. And you say, you know, let's go have a drink. Let's talk about it. And you're really there for me. But if six months later you see me again and I'm telling the story, you're not going to naturally feel like, oh, let's go out and talk about it.

19:35You're going to actually be a little repelled. You can feel it in your gut. And other people can feel it too. that point where processing becomes milking it. Talking about it becomes spewing. Being a victim for too long, whatever, right? And other people can feel it too. And when you're in that holy tomb time, as my friend would say, people have a natural, hey, I'm sorry, you know, heard about that. I'm here for you. Conscious people. And when somebody's, it's become their calling card, their victim story. Now you're doing too much. I know he hurt you, but you're bad-mouthing him in public. No, that's not cool.

20:13And that's how. And also, you know, people talk about, but at what point do you need medication because it's gone on too long? Here we are. Everybody's talking about the wisdom of the body, the genius of the body. Everybody's doing muscle testing because the body's so smart. Why don't we count tears as part of that? If the body is so intelligent, why are we assuming that it's not intelligent about how many tears you have to cry? So if you have 40, for when you say, how long does it go on? However long it has to go on, if you're conscious, if you're meditating, if you're working on forgiveness, if you're doing your spiritual work, that's a chapter on forgiveness.

20:44There's a chapter on relationships to do our work. And then if you have 45 tears to cry, 35 is not enough. And if you do a pharmaceutical bypass or whatever you do to self-medicate, to numb yourself, to distract yourself, it's in there. I mean, even talking about the campaign, I can talk about it. I don't think I could talk about it. You know, because the only way to clear it is to move through it in life. And then there are lessons learned and hopefully ways that you can be a better person. What do you think, or how long of time is the longest time you've held on to not forgiving someone else or yourself for something that's happened in your life?

21:25The lawyer who threw me under the bus and cost me a lot of money. I had a hard time with that one. When was this? Around 15 years ago. Yeah. How long were you holding on to that? It was a hard one. We're talking years. We're talking months. We're talking years. Yeah, I was bitter. Decade? Yeah. Did you finally forgive? Yeah. See, once you know spiritual principle, spiritual principle, certainly as it's articulated in something like The Course in Miracles, says that you are 100 % responsible for your experience. You and I might both go through the same experience, but how we contextualize it will determine its ultimate effect.

22:17Like I was saying at one of my lectures the other night that I see more marriages break up, not because of infidelity, but because of the other person's inability to forgive the infidelity. Makes sense. Someone we're talking about, we had a great marriage for 25 years. He went out, he had an affair with a girl. well, they did it around four or five times. It's been two years. He wants to remain in the marriage. He's really sorry. I can't forgive him. 25 years. Yeah. I mean, so, right? And fortunately, she got that and she saw that too. Forgiveness means that you are at choice. What are you going to focus on?

22:51Are you going to focus on the person's mistake or are you going to focus on anything they ever did right? Now, to the extent, the way the mind operates, to the extent to which I'm focused on what you did to me, to that extent I will be at the emotionally at the effect of what you did to me only if I'm willing to take the hook out of you will I will the hook be out of me now in terms of that lawyer I wrote a book called um the law of divine compensation and that book is about the fact that whenever there's a diminishment on the material plane the universal substance will compensate it's like if there's a hole in the ocean it doesn't matter how big the hole it doesn't matter what the shape of the hole, the universe, the ocean will fill it up.

23:33So from a metaphysical perspective, The Course in Miracles says God has the answer to every problem the moment the problem occurs. So that money, I had earned that money. So that lawyer, by doing what he did, and I think it was, many people go through this, and I think a lot of women go through this. You think the men in suits are the ones who are going to protect you, and the men in suits are the ones who, like, hello. So awakening to that is one of the, not every, not all of them, but so, um, so from a course in miracles perspective, if the money was mine, if I had earned that money, the universe, it was already programmed into the universe for that money to come back.

24:16But miracles can only occur where there is love. So unforgiveness and withhold of forgiveness blocks the miracle, deflects the miracle. So the bitterness in my personality was blocking the probability. For it to come back. For it to come back, to go on with your life. And more than that, we'll come back to you. Be in abundance. You are letting him, right. The only real abundance is love. And so when you are in abundance of love, all the abundance that matches the frequency of your need and your ultimate desire for your good, for yourself and all living things is already programmed. So your unforgiveness and your bitterness, as well as your own lack of atonement about your own mistakes, blocks the flow of the universe that would otherwise bring you all good.

25:00So what was happening in this however many years period of this lack of forgiveness for you? Were you being abundant or were other challenges coming up? Well, yes, it was just one of many situations in my life, but it just came up for me because you asked what was the longest that you ever. you know once you know spiritual principle that doesn't mean you automatically become a uh an enlightened master and you never go to those places but when you go to them you know that you went to them and oh i know what it was it's interesting that you say that because i thought of something from before when i said i couldn't remember the buddha said that one of his four noble truths is that nothing in the material world can provide anything but temporary happiness.

25:51So the entire social construct, the things of the material world can provide only temporary happiness. Okay. So when you apply that to our culture, you see that the whole thing is a setup for despair. Because half the time we're struggling and grasping because our whole thing is, you can make it, you can make it happen. Figure out what would make you happy. You can have that. You can make that dream come true. You can have that house. You can have that career. You can have that money. You can have that sex. You can have that relationship. So half the time we're in struggle and grasping, trying to make it happy because that's when we're going to be happy.

26:26Then you get there. And as Buddha said, it's only temporary. So inevitably the fairy dust will rub off. The fairy dust is going to rub off the idol. And then the rest of your time you're in despair over the fact that what you thought was going to make you happy didn't make you happy. Yeah. That was my whole childhood essentially. Exactly. Until I was like 25. Yeah. I was always striving for something, achieving it and being like, why am I miserable now? Yeah, well, I saw that in my mind the other day. I got a call that my book had reached the New York Times bestseller list. I was very happy. You're earning it.

26:53Number five on the New York Times bestseller list. So for about five minutes, I was like, woo-hoo, right, let's go have a drink. No, no, no, no, no. Yes, exactly. The ego mind is insatiable. Maybe it's just a spike. Maybe I'm just gonna be on for one week. And by the way, who's one through four, right? Why am I not number one? Right, and how can I be? I've been number one before. Why about this time? I didn't quite go there, but I did go to, what if I'm off next week? And I just saw that's the way the ego mind works. It's insatiable. It has no capacity for enough. It has no capacity for, I'm happy because I'm alive.

27:30I'm happy because I can give love and I can receive love, which is the only source of happiness. Should we be ambitious then? Well, okay. Does the embryo have to be ambitious to become a baby? Does the embryo have to say, I will become a baby. I will become a baby. Does an acorn have to say, I can strategize becoming an oak tree? Does the bud have to say, I know I can become a blossom if I work hard enough. Nature works through us all. Nature is intentional. Nature is intentional that your heart beat. It is intentional that your lungs breathe. It is intentional that the bud blossom. It is intentional.

28:05And so when you are in your self-actualized state, which is not trying to make it happen but allowing it to happen nature is ambitious through you because nature is intentional that all things rise to their highest level of creative possibility and our struggle mode tightens us you you can feel it in your body it puts you in a so how do you focus every single day on not being tight or struggling meditation is that a daily practice for you absolutely i'm of course a miracle student so i do the workbook of the course i also do transcendental meditation, although I'm not daily with that, like I am with the workbook of the course, there are many different paths of meditation, people doing yoga and meditation and prayer, a serious spiritual path though, because a serious spiritual path, which is a path of relinquishing the thought system that dominates the world, the thought system of fear and accepting instead a thought system based on love.

29:01So like, I'm not an enlightened master. I'm not beyond going to those places, but it's like the whole thing about the bestseller list. I was able to I got fought myself once I saw myself going there. And then you surrender it to God and say, take this false ambition away from me and this craziness. It's only here to hurt me. What would you say are some non-negotiables for you every single day? It sounds like meditation is one. Are there a few other things you're like, I must do this every single day. Otherwise I'm going to feel the effects of whatever. What's non-negotiable? Like I must get a certain amount of sleep or eat a certain way.

29:32I must monitor myself. And I must not make excuses for myself. What excuses do you make or have to make? Well, I had a right to be angry. I had a right to be angry You did this to me Yeah, yeah You know, we have a right to feel our feelings You have a right, of course you have a right to feel whatever you feel But maybe instead of saying I have a right to be angry I take that back I'm not saying that you don't have a right to be angry But I never have a right to express it as an attack on another human being That I think that You mean to attack back We are too emotionally self-indulgent In our culture we have this feeling well if i feel it i have the right to say it if i feel it i have the right to do it and this is a is a form of self-sabotage you know your ego mind is your self-hatred masquerading as your self-love you know some of the most selfish self-sabotaging things we do these days we call self-care setting a boundary well there are healthy boundaries and there is self-care but a lot of times the ego mind will use that to justify what 20 years ago we just could have called selfish jerk behavior.

30:34For example, what do you mean? Well, I need to tell you that what you just did absolutely did not work for me. Well, that's not going to open your heart. Do you know what? I might say, may I, may I, I have something I'd like to discuss. Is this a good time for you? I mean, there might be feedback. There might be, but there is an appropriate way to talk about it. You know, sometimes these days we say, well, I communicated. I needed to communicate my truth. But the word communication has the word commune inside it. So if I didn't commune when I was communicating, I actually didn't communicate. Because if it was, if I talked to you in a way that felt like an attack to you rather than genuinely sharing.