Is “Manifesting” Not Working For You? THESE 3 SECRETS Will SHIFT THAT TODAY!

29:02Man, those cookies are so good. Those cookies are so good in a moment. Just, oh man, I love those cookies. But there's so much greater benefit when you can delay or at least not every day have to go for the cookies. I'm not saying never enjoy it, but, um, you know, as a metaphor, just not going for the pleasure every single day, really going for a state of long-term happiness and fulfillment. Yeah. Um, comes down to making yourself proud of who you are. Absolutely. Yeah. And that feeling is not replaceable by any other thing. I don't think. That's true. I think when you're like, I really am happy, almost like you're in a parent being like, you know what that was a hard decision but really I'm impressed with you I think that is the ultimate if you want to be happy you make yourself proud of you 100 when was the time in the last decade you were the least proud of you and at your lowest energy state I think the end of that really my the ending of that relationship was very difficult for me because another thing that I was really conditioned with my mom is indian and my parents have been married forever and one of the things i really was conditioned with is that it's if a relationship goes well you've done well like it's your job as a woman to make a good relationship and so you fail you're the failure if you don't make it work wow that was a big one for me so that was a really really hard time of being like am I defected as a woman?

30:30Am I not desirable enough? Did I not do enough? Was I not more malleable? Should I have, you know, been more flexible or rolled down more? You know, whatever. All those different stories that you can create. I think that was a really big one for me. But I don't think I would have undone that conditioning if I hadn't gone through that experience. Wow. So you felt like you were a failure with the relationship ending. Yeah. I felt like it was on me. I think a lot of women go through that too. Really? I think they feel responsible for making a relationship go well. I mean, there's something to be said for people who are in relationships for decades that are like, listen, we had some hard seasons, some hard years.

31:13And we could have easily just said, you know what? This isn't working or some bad stuff happened and we should have left. But we decided to stay together. and we're so grateful 10, 20, 30 years later that we did because every relationship has some seasons. Yeah. But then there's also, like I see that point of view, but then I'm also like, okay, if your body is rejecting something and it's telling you this is not working and I'm giving it my all and I'm trying and we're going to therapy and you're really trying to commit to make it work, but you're rejecting it and it's just a disconnect. I also see the benefit and the value and consciously uncoupling and saying, listen, we got to go.

31:53This isn't working. Let's take some time and maybe we come back together in the future. And I don't think there's a right or wrong either way. I don't think it's like you're a failure if you didn't go through all the hard times and go for 30, 40 years and make it out beautiful holding hands as like 90 year olds on the other side. Because you can also be together for a long time and be miserable. A hundred percent. You know, it's like, and there's a lot of probably Indian families that just stay together even though they don't fully love and have a fullness of life. Yes. Right? I'm sure you see both.

32:23Completely. And that's the thing and I love that you've touched on this because that's the thing about human design is that we're always trying to look for, always tough it out or leave the second you're ready. But actually, everyone's on a different path. Yeah. So that advice isn't going to work for everybody. And, you know, you're kind of, I guess, well predisposed to seeing this because you're very open in your chart I had a look at you're very open in your mind so it is always about kind of not having your fixed opinions on things it's always about saying yeah I could see that maybe sure I don't know could be wrong could be right let's see right and that's one of your gifts and I think that's one of the things is that we're always trying to find the right way to do life and then wronging everybody else who's not fitting into that directive and say instead of saying we are all on radically different journeys journeys no one else can even ever even come close to understanding.

33:13So us using our, again, using our mental energy on trying to find some kind of system that makes us all be on the same thing or same level of understanding or same goal, or it's just a moot exercise, you know? And I think that the challenge or the opportunity we all get to face is, are we going to live our life trying to please everyone else based on our decisions or lack of decisions or feeling guilty and bad and wrong for decisions we make that others don't approve of. Because it's really hard to make decisions if we're thinking, why do I want people to be upset at me? And I did that for a long time.

33:49I stayed in relationships too long that I shouldn't have. I got out of stuff that I probably shouldn't have because I was worried about the opinions of others. So you felt like you were in a low part at the end of that relationship because you felt like a failure. I felt like I wasn't being my best self. I felt like it wasn't bringing out the best of me and And therefore I shamed myself for that because it's not good to feel like you're not happy with how you're being. Right. And and also, yeah, I really had to contend with like, if I end this, then am I stupid? Am I making a really bad decision?

34:22Because, again, like you were saying, he's great on people. We're good enough together. My whole family loves him. He's successful. He's this. He's nice to me. He's yeah. All that stuff. you know um what what was in telling you like this isn't in alignment or this isn't the right thing for me right now what was telling you was it your intuition was it your gut was it just like you didn't feel like you're in your purpose or your joy how were you able to know that okay i've given this enough time and the season is ready to move on to the next thing yeah i think i can come up with a lot of logical reasons for you but i think i think ultimately if i watch myself and net-net, my emotional state was more negative than positive.

35:04In the relationship. Towards the end. Ah. So then that kind of tells you, again, it's like the body knows, right? Like it just, it's so tangible. We just need to watch ourselves as if from above and say, does this person look like a thriving, does it look like it's suiting you or not? And you don't need to be able to explain it away. On a more, I guess, on a more logical level, um i went in with certain roles that i played that were again if we're always trying to be who we came here to be they weren't ultimately part of who i was right they weren't serving you yes or your future you your highest you yes so you went in playing certain roles in relationship and then you realize this isn't sustainable this isn't me so it was kind of like your responsibility yeah for being those roles because you were almost completely inauthentic in a sense right And those are my cookies.

35:56Look how good of a girlfriend I am. Look how supportive I am. Look, you know what I mean? The cookies are sometimes a little hidden like that, right? It's like, look how much I'm helping this person be successful. That's so much more easy than trying to be successful on my own. Interesting. So from, I mean, I don't know anything about the relationship, but if I was in that, I'd be like, wow, okay, this person, this is who this person is. They're showing up in this way. And now they're trying to be something different. It might be confusing for the guy. Oh no, very. So it's not, right. He's probably like, Wait a minute, you were super supportive, and now something is shifting, and now you're trying to be this other thing.

36:29That's not, you know, who are you? Oh, I played such a good trophy wife, and I was good at it. Like you said, like with the previous sport, like I was good at it, right? So you can't blame. You have to, I think, ultimate self-responsibility gives you ultimate power over your own life. You absolutely, everything is for your own movie, so it's always I, I, I, I, I. I played the good role. I played the thing, and therefore, I got out of it what I put in. Right. It doesn't matter about who the character is that I was playing with. I would have played that character on whoever it was. For anyone, until you learned the lesson.

37:00Exactly. That this wasn't, I mean, maybe it's like, okay, I can be this sometimes, but this is not the role I'm supposed to be playing in my life right now. Is that what it sounds like? This is interesting. But here's the other interesting thing. You've been studying human design for, I guess, three to five years by that point already. Okay. So what were you not listening to with your own study and practice of human design? Yes. What was your human design telling you to do that you were directly going against? This is really interesting. I think the emotional piece again, actually with us, because I was so suppressing my own, my joy and my sadness.

37:40You were suppressing it. Suppressing. Why were you suppressing joy? Because I think England is a little different than America. You know, you can't be too... There were certain situations where I felt like, and therefore was told, but that's because I felt like it, right? That's why it actualized in the outside world. You can't just drink tea at midnight and just be dancing on the table by yourself. Like, you know, have some alcohol, fit in, like sit down and be cool and have conversations. And, you know, I felt this like want to be kind of like, you know unboundedly joyful for no reason that i suppressed and i also suppressed tears right because you're because friends or society in england was like oh don't be too happy like you're wacky that's crazy yeah relax a little bit yeah you can't and when you were emotional or crying they're like what are you crying for you know they couldn't take it either way these dreams yes it's kind of keep it in the middle of this not servicey but kind of not fully authentic way of being is what I'm hearing you say.

38:40At least the people you're with or the places you're around. Yes. So you were surprising both emotions. Yes. To be more provisible. To be more accepted or fit in. Mm-hmm. Interesting. And now... To try to belong. Yes. But you weren't being fully authentic or vulnerable. No. And so you weren't actually belonging at all because you weren't belonging to yourself. And if you take it in this frame, like you're asking me, the emotion is your motor center as an emotional being right when you're an emotional being emotions is your power center comes from your solar plexus right and you took it away so when you take that away firstly you have less energy second of all you can't make decisions the correct decisions in your life and you're suppressing all of your life force from directing your life forward so if you imagine okay there was already certain things that were supposed to be in play to move my life forward for me from the universe just like there is for all of us you're literally be holding them back from just, instead of just letting them, unleashing them, right?

39:39Letting your destiny move through you, right? Because you're just holding yourself back because you're saying, this is not a good way to be. I don't want to be this way. I don't want to be an emotional being. Okay. So you're constricting all of that life was inside of you instead of letting it out. Wow. So then you stay small. And you don't use your voice. At all. You didn't feel like you used your voice at all? not until the end and then i think i'd suppressed it so much that it came out completely um how do you put this um disproportionate you know when you keep so many things inside extreme yeah you you say some well not even extreme but you say i'm not happy and someone's like what do you mean you're not happy it's come out of nowhere like you seem to have it last few years yeah you know and that's unfair to do on a person yeah instead of communicate along the way of I feel sad today and I don't know why and it's nothing to do with you but I just need my space to be sad.

40:32Right. That's what emotional needs to be doing. There's no rhyme or reason sometimes when you feel really teary or you feel like I have a different emotional way to other people. Different sizes, different behaviors, different patterns of emotions. Mine is kind of sad and happy. Sad and happy. Really? Like I feel teary and then I want to dance down the street. Within like a moment. It's a day to day I'd say. Okay, gotcha. And then other people, you know, when they are really low, and these are people who often get diagnosed as being, you know, manic or bipolar or whatever. There's just some people who have so much creative emotional power in them.

41:10Think about people who've moved the world through a song about a breakup, right? When they're in that songwriting process, they need to remove themselves and be away from people. Admire in that sadness so fully because it creates something inside them. But instead if they're like no put on a brave face and go out there and be with people and hide that It's saving it's basically Muffling all of that creative power inside them, right? Low and high emotions is what makes a human experience worth living if everything was just neutral There'd be no point in being here, right? So the emotionals color life But we also need to be mindful of how much we allow other people like you to understand It's not about you if I'm sad today and if I come to you and I say I'm really sad today can I cry?

41:56And then you hold my hand. That makes us bond more. And you know, it's not about you. Right. And so it creates deeper intimacy when people are OK with their emotions. Right. And sharing them.

42:22Anything of significance that a person has achieved over their life, they didn't know how to do it when they started. That's true. A quantum leap is one of those things that's dead solid perfect within the realm of possibility for you. You just haven't done it yet.

42:46But it's a real stretch goal. And the thing about it is, if you set your goal right, it forces you out of your current modus operandi. If you set your goal correctly, how do you know how to set your goal the right way in order to create a quantum leap in your life there's several things about goal setting that i think are real key points um if you're shooting to make this kind of an exponential leap in performance so then first it needs to be a serious stretch go you need to scare the horses you know it needs to scare you yeah you need to There needs to be some, there needs to be, but secondly, it needs to be a goal that, it needs to be a love story around that goal, I think.

43:46Because when you go for a big goal, any goal of much significance, you're going to have some setbacks. You're going to have some obstacles that come along. You're going to get kind of banged up and bruised up maybe. and you need to care enough, you know, the heart is what sustains you through that. And so there, you know, people talk about a passion for this goal. And I think, well, that's a fine word and it fits. But some people say, well, I just don't have that passion. Well, you just need to care for it or at least be committed enough to it that you say, I'm going to stay the course. I will put myself out there, and I think that it needs to be your goal, not somebody else's goal for you.

44:41Not a should or ought to goal. I think the fundamental mistake that a lot of people make is they don't believe in themselves enough, and they don't reach high enough. who is at Astro Teller, who is the head of Google X, you know, their innovative arm that said 10 % can be as hard as 10X. You know, a 10 % improvement, not necessarily any improver. Small acquisitions were every bit as difficult to make work as the big ones, which is kind of a counterintuitive thought. I mean, normally people don't go out with their mind drifting down that path. But you squared the handbook is, it's kind of based on counterintuitive ideas, kind of things that stop you and kind of, you know, make yourself uncomfortable.

45:39You know, that's one of the points. Well, why would I want to do that? You're an athlete. If you're not willing to make yourself uncomfortable, you got to get off the field. Absolutely. Yeah. So it's almost like 10x is just as easy or just as challenging as 2x. And it's about how you frame it and about going after it the right way. It's what it sounds like. They're both going to be challenging. So you might as well go for the bigger leap than the one that's like just a little bit more uncomfortable. So if people are looking to make more money, make a bigger impact and work with more influential people in their life or people that are more disciplined and up to a bigger game, which is what it sounds like that you wanted to do early in your career.

46:24You wanted to make more money. You wanted to make a bigger impact, a bigger difference, and you wanted to work with leaders. What was it inside of you that said, okay, I'm going to make this quantum leap. Was there, was it a moment? Did you feel like you put in all the work that you needed to? Was it an awakening? Was there a breakdown you were facing your life where you said, okay, I'm, I'm not happy with incremental growth year after year in my personal or professional life. what was that deciding moment that said i'm going to try something unconventional and completely change the course of my life boredom boredom boredom and and just like a purpose and hungry i was hungry for for scaling up i mean really a major scaling up i thought that we were we weren't making any mistakes.

47:15You weren't failing enough. We weren't. I mean, we were on autopilot. I mean, the place, it ran too smoothly. And it began to just bore me, and I got disgusted. Why do people get so comfortable? Why do they get so comfortable? Yeah, when they used to have quantum leaps, you know, from crawling to walking to running to... And then it's just kind of sitting. People are so different. I mean, they're so alike, too, but they're so different. And some people just have a much higher need for achievement. Some people have a much higher energy level and some, you know, on and on and on. The human needs might be different.

47:57They're just different. Some people want growth. Some people want achievement. Some people want contribution. Some people want a job that they want to nurture other people. I got a PhD in psychology. I did a year-long clinical internship. I worked on a psychiatric ward. That is not, and I knew from the word go, that that was not where I would end up. It just, but you got people, they're drawn to that, and that's the wonderful thing about the world, the difference. But the truth is, I don't care where, I don't care what direction a person is drawn. They can make quantum leaps in that zone, whatever their strike zone is.

48:47But I don't really spend a lot of time, I guess, trying to talk people into making a quantum leap unless they have something inside. They've got to want it. Just annoying at them. They've got to be hungry. they gotta be you know anxious about something changing they gotta want to change they do because some people know they want something more but they don't know exactly what it is yeah and so they're in the uncertainty of well i'm not sure which direction i should go in and here's another problem i see is people have too many passions i've got this idea and this idea and this idea which one do i choose and when someone has 10 different passions or different roads that could go down how do they know which one they should go down that want to factor that's the x factor and um you know people talk about willpower well i want to talk about want power um what does that mean oh it's want power is how much do you want this thing again you know how much are you in love with this idea um i do think that there are times when we're kind of directionless or a person certainly can be and so for that poor soul although they might be happy content doing fine really but they they kind of like something to change and be bigger and better and more dramatic or whatever And so sometimes I think we can maybe find that magical era just by playing with a curiosity or saying yes to a random opportunity that just comes smack in front of us.

50:49or maybe deciding, well, I'm going to muscle up one of my superpowers. I'm going to sort of really get into that because I have fun with that and I'm good at it. So those are things I think that one can play with when they're not just totally... They're not sure the direction. Yeah. Yeah. And it sounds like once we can figure out which direction we want to go in to make a quantum leap, it's hard to make a decision of which direction to go for some people where other people just know, this is the thing I love. I'm excited about this. I have some skills or talent around this idea or this thing, and I'm going to go all in on it.

51:32But once you can figure out the path you're going and the direction you're going to take, how do you know it's time to take a quantum leap in that path versus, all right, I got to figure out my bearings and figure out where I'm heading in this direction and just kind of create some goals and get it going. But how do I know when my time is ready for a unconventional growth spurt, for a leap so big and grand that other people think I'm crazy and laugh at me when I talk about it? I don't think you will necessarily know.

52:09I think you make a decision. One of the chapters in the U Squared Handbook is make your move before you're ready.

52:21I'll tell you where big dreams go to die. Tell me. They go to the planning place. getting ready place, preparing myself. And it's the biggest con job we work on ourselves. There are so many bones of big dreams in that graveyard where people, it's always something that there's always going to be a set of reasons to wait.

52:56And it's like Gilda Radner, that line of hers on Saturday Night Live. You know, it's always something. Well, it is. And so, when are you going to take the risk? You pick 10 people at random, and I'll bet$100 that we can find quantum leaps in every one of them. Really? Oh, yeah. And if you stop and think about it, everybody's made quantum leaps before they reach school age. because you come into this world naked. You can't speak. You can't feed yourself. You can't get around. And by the age of three, you're doing all three of those things. It's true. It's pretty incredible. Now, go and look at what that child did.

53:53They were willing to fail. Over and over and over again. And over and over again. They had no methodology. They just knew what they wanted. And they were willing to make mistakes to show them the way there. And it's the same thing when they learned to ride a bicycle, when they learned to swim, when they learned to run as opposed to walk. And so those are all, that's not an incremental thing. You can't crawl fast enough to become a walker. You know, you got to change the game. It's a totally different game. Wading is W-A-D-I-N-G, and the water is, you can't wade fast enough to swim. And so it's that process of being willing to take new risks, change your modus operandi, fail your way to success.

54:52you talk about seeking failure uh in one of the chapters of u squared and in another chapter about suspend disbelief i loved a few quotes in this because i believe self-doubt is the biggest killer of dreams it's what holds us back from taking the steps necessary to fail often frequently in order to make those big leaps and in your your chapter on suspend disbelief you started with saying act as if your success is for certain. Most people will have so much doubt. Is this possible? What happens if I fail? What happens if I do succeed? The pressure. What about all the judgment I'm going to get from the actions and the failures?

55:34And you say, if you must doubt something, doubt your limits. I love that line. And one other line that really stood out to me is your doubts are not the product of accurate thinking, but habitual thinking. And when I read that, I was like, wow, this is so true. It's not a product of accurate thinking. It's of habitual thinking. We've been thinking limited consistently. And this habit of thinking limited keeps us in a limited state of being, a state of mind, as opposed to accurate thinking, what is possible. We don't step into that enough. and this whole chapter really opened up for me because I, I, my thesis in life is self-doubt is the killer of dreams.

56:20And when we can learn to believe in self, which is something you talked about here as well, needing to believe in yourself, uh, it needs to be your goal and you need to have a love story around this pursuit. But if we can't learn to believe in self, it's going to be hard. You can love the idea of your goal. You can have clear goals, but if you doubt you, your dreams are going to die. And I think that's a challenging thing for people to say, well, how do I learn to believe in self? How do I learn to have accurate thinking, not habitual thinking? How do I, uh, you know, learn to doubt my limits as opposed to doubting myself?

56:56And how do I learn to act as if my success is for certain when I've always doubted me? What do you say to, to that statement? Yeah, it's a killer question.

57:12Well, you get to choose how you behave. To heck with your thinking. Let's say your thinking is what it is, and it's riddled with doubt. You're ravaged with doubt. You still get to choose how you behave.

57:32and you can you can act like you've got what it takes you can't you can do it it's not easy and you can feel like a I'm faking this oh am I ever faking this but the best actors in Hollywood make a lot of money exactly and they're playing a role yeah they aren't that role that's right that's not who they are in their normal life but they're playing a role, and the better you can act, the more money you can make in Hollywood. Well, if we said George Burns or someone that said something about, I won't get this precise, but it's something like authenticity is the key. If you can fake that, you got it made.

58:13Right, right, right. But so that's one thing, and just go against everything that's going on inside you because most people are not going to know. and but there's another thing manage your remembering what does that mean your memory uh painful moments what you go back and what you what you dwell on um when you go back over the years i mean i can go back just like that I can think something, and I can pull up again and again and again. All these times that I've been embarrassed, I've been humiliated, I've failed, dropped the ball. You know, I can dwell on that if I want to. But I can also go back and the times that I pulled it off, the times I did it right.

59:11I surprised myself how good it felt when I was good to somebody else. You know, on and on and on. So you get to dwell on whatever you want to dwell on. And we're too indiscriminate. It's kind of like these two voices we've got in our head. We've got a hero voice and we've got a villain voice. You know? And who are you going to give airtime to? People talk about having a coach. Well, the coach that is closest to you is the voices inside your head. You're coaching yourself all the time. And you get to decide which voice you want to hand the mic to.

59:58And the villain voice is very compelling. And he's a con artist because so much of the time he's like, I'm here to protect you. buddy i'm on your side i'm going to keep you from screwing up i don't want you to fail i don't want you to embarrass yourself you know just listen to me now and so he focuses on mistakes on your weaker points and all the why nots your hero voice focuses on your strengths your accomplishments and so on and so on.

1:00:53What's your thoughts on manifesting and manifesting something you want and alchemizing it into the world? Do you believe in manifesting? Do you believe in a, you know, artists should be thinking in that way? Or what's your thoughts on it? I believe in it a million percent. It's something that I've experienced before I knew what it was. So when I say it's like, I feel like it has to do with the purity of the intention behind what you're doing. If your intention is pure and you're doing it for the right reasons, It seems like things tend to work out. And that ends up being a manifestation mindset.

1:01:46But it didn't start for me that way. It just was like, I really believe in what I'm doing. I really care about it. I want it to be the best it could be for me. And I'm excited to share it. And the results have shown me that you can manifest things. It happens. But I'll say when I do it, it's never based on the outcome. Ooh, what do you mean? I'm never asking for a result. What are you asking for? I'm asking to rise to the occasion to make the best thing that I can, for the thing that I make to be great. Great is a vague word. I don't know what great means. I came to realize recently what great means, but I didn't know.

1:02:32most of my life I was aiming for great, but I didn't know what that was. And I've come to realize that great means it's a devotional, it's a devotional kind of greatness. It's a gift to the universe. It's a gift to God. If you're making a gift to God, there's no greater, you can't put more into it than that. You know, you can't, what about the single? What about what about what someone's going to say? Who has anything to say if we're making a gift for God? You're putting all of your purest intention into this thing for the universe. Wow. That's where it's at. I didn't know that. I came to realize that recently.

1:03:18Again, my word was greatness. Yeah. Greatness. That was the word of what I was shooting for. But I've come to realize what it is. Wow. You have a whole section about greatness and success in the creative act, a way of being, which I love your explanation there. That is fascinating. So greatness for you, what I'm hearing you say, is a pure gift of yours to God. Yes. And it's a gift of yourself to God. It's like, this is the best I can do. This is my offering. This is what I have to offer. If you think of a formula for manifesting as an artist, what would that formula be? I don't think there's a formula.

1:04:06Is there an art to manifesting? I don't know. I think it sounds like a shortcut, and I don't think there are shortcuts. I think it's always a version of doing the work, of finding your way into what it is that the universe wants you to do and then really dedicating yourself. How do you know what the universe wants you to do and when to do it? The right timing. Because you could be like, I have this idea for this thing. Maybe it's the right time now. Maybe it's five, ten years away from now. How do we really tap into that knowing? I think it's situational. And I think, again, if you're tapped into the universe, it tells you.

1:04:56It directs you. An example, I may have three different ideas that I'm excited about. And I kind of get them all going. And then one of them just seems to take off on its own. And one of them, no matter how hard I work on it, it never seems to come together. You can't find the right collaborators, some obstacles in the way. When that happens, I feel like it's the universe saying now is not the time. Interesting. Because, you know, I love this. And I also hear the other side of the, I guess, the coin where, you know, I don't know if you know Ryan Holiday. Yeah, I do. The obstacle is the way is his kind of stoic philosophy of like when the obstacle is there, it presents itself.

1:05:46And you also feel like this is something you want to do. Like you've got to kind of go through that pain and then, you know, to overcome it. That is part of it. I'm not saying to turn away from the obstacle. But I'm saying when the obstacles become insurmountable consistently and there's another path that's going smoothly and you feel the same about both of them. You know, I. Go over the effortless way. Well, pay attention. See when is the universe giving you a push? When is the wind hitting your sails the right way? There's something to it. I would never suggest not fighting through the work.

1:06:27It's grueling no matter what. It's grueling no matter what. That said, sometimes it feels like now's not the time. It's like everything you throw at it gets deflected. Right. But this other thing is guiding you. Taking on its own life. Earlier you asked about what I perceive to be a shortcut. And a shortcut is how little can I get away with doing? And I think that the real question is how much more can I give? to the thing I'm making. What else can I give to it? And thinking in terms of how much more can we do, not how much less can we do. It's not about shortcuts. It's not about getting it done.

1:07:24It's not about a four hour work week. I loved it. Right. I loved it, but that's not, it's like whatever it takes for it to be all it could be,

1:07:37commitment and total commitment and dedicating your life to making the best things you can whatever it is yeah that's beautiful man um and so do you so you think that as an artist we should be thinking about manifesting but not in the terms of doing less but putting the maximum into making it great. Doing anything that's within our power, if it doesn't have to make sense, nothing has to make sense. It could be when I wear these purple socks, I can write a better song. Great. Doesn't matter. Don't question it. Just do whatever works. Do it. Is it really art if you're making money off of it? Absolutely.

1:08:32It doesn't matter. It's not about the outcome. That's what I'm saying. If you don't make money or if you do make money, that has nothing to do with the art. Art is the art and then whatever happens after, happens after. If you make something that you love, I know if I make something I love, if more people like it, that's only a good thing. Now, I wouldn't change a word of it for someone else to like it. Do you know what I'm saying? It's like I make the thing I love and then present it to the world. And then if the world likes it, great. And if more people like it than less, better. Why not? We're sharing something we love, something we think is beautiful.

1:09:17So the more people who embrace it. But again, I would never change it for anyone else because that's not what it's about. It's not about that. With the artists you've worked with that you knew before they were global successes or their art, their music was known by many, what did you see became their biggest challenge once they became extremely successful? because a lot of artists, I would think, want their art to be liked and listened to by people. They want to make a living and more people like it. Typically, that's a good thing, typically. But sometimes we see artists who have this incredible rise of success and then seem to struggle with whatever, depression, anxiety, maybe the pressure.

1:10:09Can I do this again? Will I be able to have these many hits again? What is the biggest challenge you see with artists becoming successful? Probably the biggest one is nobody prepares you for success. And you may have a dream of what it's like. And you may think the success is going to fill some hole you have in your soul. And you work your whole life for the success that's going to fill the hole. And finally, you get the success and the whole is the same. And it creates hopelessness. Wow. Because you always, you're working towards this goal that's going to fix the problem. But the goal doesn't fix the problem.

1:11:03I would say, I can't say never, but I would say almost never fixes the problem. What fixes the problem for people? It's something else. It's something inside themselves. It's something inside themselves. So do you think success can almost hurt someone more than before they have it, after they have it? It just depends on the person's temperament. For some people, being famous is the greatest thing. It's all they ever wanted. And for some people, they become famous and it's the worst nightmare. That's not what they wanted. They miss their privacy. They miss their anonymity. they miss being able to go and do whatever they want and not be singled out or pointed to or talked to or even if people are nice like it's a different it's different um and no one teaches you how to do that or you want to you know go do something with your family and then there are photographers there and it's it's very uh awkward what uh what advice do you have for people that want to be famous, you know, success is one thing, but fame is another thing and they don't always happen together for someone that wants to be famous.

1:12:24What advice would you have for them? I don't know. I would say I would look at why that is. I would maybe see, you know, consider therapy. Right. Have you ever done therapy yourself? I've done. Yeah. I've done all kinds of therapy. What has been the biggest lesson you learned through therapy for you? I learned how to express my feelings clearly. The first time I went to therapy, I didn't even know how to talk. I didn't know how I felt about anything. How old were you then? Maybe 26. So you learned how to express your feelings then? Yes. And to not only express them, but also to actually feel them in myself, to understand, not just feel blocked off or frustrated or what's beneath it, what's actually going on.

1:13:11And what is the biggest lessons that meditation or meditation practices has provided for you? It provides a quiet space where the chatter, you realize that your thoughts are not you. And that left to your own devices, there'll be a lot of voices in your head just going all the time. And they're not you. And they don't mean anything. And they're really repetitious. They're not working in your best interest. So if your thoughts aren't you, then what are you? I suppose you are the unchanging part of yourself that's always there. From probably from the time you're born until the time you die and maybe before and after.

1:14:10it's the it's what's really inside it's not

1:14:19it's not changeable it's what you came with it's not the thinking mind it's almost being the observer of the thoughts the one who sees the thoughts that sounds right Yeah. Observing your thoughts. Thank you. That's what I was hearing you say. When do you feel the most loved, Rick? I would say in general, I feel loved. It's a good feeling. I feel spiritually connected. And that gives me a great feeling of peace. Where do you think you'd be in your life if you weren't a meditator? and where do you think you'd be if you allowed yourself to play with drugs and alcohol yeah i can't i can't really predict i would say meditation without meditation i don't know who i would be it's such a big part of who i am uh informed so many everything my my understanding of the world is based on learning to meditate when I was young.

1:15:37So I don't know who I would be without that. Do you think you would have as much internal harmony and peace and external success without meditation? No, certainly not internal peace. I don't know about success. I wanted to ask you a question about comparison. You mentioned the NBA basketball player needing to post more on social media based on what their team or the coaches, or maybe not the coaches, but maybe the general managers wanted them to do. With artists, I see a lot of people competing and being in comparison versus just sharing their truths in an authentic way. And sometimes on social media, people are vulnerable because it gets attention and then they're over vulnerable and then that becomes a game, uh, in itself.

1:16:29But in a world where everything is oversaturated seeming, uh, and there is a lot of competition for attention. How can an artist stay true to their inner voice and not be in comparison, but be willing to collaborate and also see success in others and be okay with it? Yeah. I think, I think staying staying out of it you know like not participating in that game that's it's someone else's game that's someone else's game i would suggest play your own game i can remember having a conversation with a a big one of the biggest artists in the world who described an album that they were going to make and uh and i had just seen them play in a stadium full of people screaming and crying and it was not Paul McCartney.

1:17:20And the album that they were describing was one that none of those 70 ,000 people screaming and crying wanted to hear. It was clear to me. And I remember saying, that's not your hand. Like you play, when you're playing poker, it's not, you can't just play any cards. you play the you play your hand based on the cards you've been dealt so depending on the artist you are like um it'd be like there was a time i think when metallica felt like we don't really want to be a heavy metal band we want to be a pop band because pop bands were what's popular and we have reached a ceiling being a heavy metal band that did not go well that was a bad idea they weren't playing their hand.

1:18:13They weren't embracing Metallica. And I think if you embrace your part, it's your best chance being true to yourself, not saying, oh, well, those people over there are getting popular doing this other thing. I don't really like it, but it's really working for them. Maybe I could try that recipe for disaster. So don't chase something that's not your hand. No. No. I hope you enjoyed today's episode and it inspired you on your journey towards greatness. Make sure to check out the show notes in the description for a full rundown of today's episode with all the important links. And if you want weekly exclusive bonus episodes with me personally, as well as ad-free listening, then make sure to subscribe to our Greatness Plus channel exclusively on Apple Podcasts.

1:19:06Share this with a friend on social media and leave us a review on Apple Podcasts as well. Let me know what you enjoyed about this episode in that review. I really love hearing feedback from you and it helps us figure out how we can support and serve you moving forward. And I want to remind you if no one has told you lately that you are loved, you are worthy and you matter. And now it's time to go out there and do something great.