In short
Joe Koy argues that “winning” comes from failure and relentless action—saying yes to opportunities, learning from bombing, and turning insecurity into material. He also describes how he built his career through constant self-promotion and showing up under bad conditions, including hand-delivering flyers even after sellouts.
Guest backgrounds
Joe Koy is a stand-up comedian, actor, and producer with multiple sold-out Netflix specials, including Blue in the Face. He’s performed in major arenas worldwide and has long-running TV/stand-up credits.
Key claims
Hope is not a strategy; you win by betting on your own work. Not trying is the real failure. Confidence comes from the stage and from persistence despite rejection and racism in entertainment opportunities. He frames his career as a long cycle of wins and losses, driven by desire/passion rather than external permission.
Notable examples
He recalls bombing early, then pushing anyway. He describes getting booked on BET’s Comic View after approaching promoter Yvette Anderson at a Vegas venue, then doing a short set that led to a standing ovation. He recounts joining the Def Comedy Jam/Black college circuit through Honest John and later winning Apollo Showtime at the Apollo. He also shares making and hand-delivering 10,000 flyers for Netflix and continuing the practice for sold-out shows.
Written by AI. May contain mistakes. Listen to the episode to check what was said.
Chapters
Tap a time to open that second in VOIntroduction of Joe Koy
2:30 to 3:11
Introduction of comedian Joe Koy and discussion on his impact.
“Everywhere I go, airports, events, walking down the street, people stop me and say, Lewis, this show got me through one of the hardest seasons of my life.”
The Journey of a Comedian
3:11 to 4:19
Joe shares his early experiences and belief in his comedic talent.
“Make sure to follow right now to stay up to date on the latest and greatest.”
Learning from Failure
4:19 to 5:30
Discussion on how failure helps comedians grow and develop.
“specials, including his newest, Blue in the Face.”
The Grind of Stand-Up Comedy
5:30 to 6:40
Joe reflects on the challenges and persistence needed in stand-up comedy.
Notion of Success
6:40 to 7:35
Exploring the meaning of success and moments of believing you've made it.
The Rollercoaster of Comedy
7:35 to 14:00
Joe discusses the ups and downs of his comedy career and what keeps him going.
“Was there ever a time where you weren't funny?”
The Journey of Becoming a Comic
14:00 to 15:00
Learn about the challenges and ups and downs of Jo Koy's early career as a comedian.
The Emotional Rollercoaster of Comedy
15:00 to 16:00
Jo Koy shares the emotional highs and lows that come with being a comic.
Unexpected Breakthroughs
16:00 to 18:00
Discover how Jo Koy seized opportunities in the comedy scene through perseverance.
“Like the way I got BET's Comic View was crazy.”
The BET's Comic View Experience
18:00 to 20:00
Hear the story of how Jo Koy prepared for and performed on BET's Comic View.
Show all 33 chapters
From Open Mic to Stand-Up Success
20:00 to 22:30
Jo Koy recounts how he transitioned from local gigs to larger stages in comedy.
“I go Joe Coy man I'm a local comic here he's like okay man that was wow that was amazing you ever watch BET?”
Navigating the Comedy Circuit
22:30 to 25:50
Learn about Jo Koy's experiences on the black college comedy circuit and its impact on his career.
“They'd rent out the theater at like University of Houston, University of North Carolina.”
The Path to Def Comedy Jam
25:50 to 28:01
Jo Koy shares how he got involved with Def Comedy Jam and the significance of that moment.
“You remember the Carol Burnett show when the girl would walk in between?”
Journey to Apollo: A Comedian's Breakthrough
28:01 to 29:20
Learn about Jo Koy's path to performing at the Apollo and the importance of seizing opportunities.
“goes i didn't know rudy looks at me and he goes you ever do the apollo i swear to god bro this is exactly how it went down he goes you ever do you ever watch the apollo i go yeah he goes man i'm producers call you, man.”
Journey to Apollo: A Comedian's Breakthrough
29:28 to 30:09
Learn about Jo Koy's path to performing at the Apollo and the importance of seizing opportunities.
“Suddenly, people are flying in and exploring neighborhoods, finding local restaurants, and getting to experience a place that you call home.”
Overcoming Insecurity and Cultural Barriers
31:53 to 40:08
Jo Koy shares his struggles with insecurity and the cultural challenges he faced as a comedian.
Navigating Race and Opportunity in Comedy
40:08 to 42:00
Gain insights into the racial dynamics and limited opportunities in the comedy scene of the past.
“If you had Cedric the Entertainer, ask him what night was the white night.”
The Rise of Fat Tuesdays
42:00 to 45:18
Learn how Fat Tuesdays became a platform for emerging black comics.
“Because Tuesday night was the only night that they turned the lights off.”
The Struggles of a Young Comic
45:18 to 46:08
Discover the sacrifices made for pursuing a career in comedy.
“I see so many good ideas sit in notes apps for months and the people who ship find ways to remove friction and keep moving.”
The Struggles of a Young Comic
46:14 to 46:50
Discover the sacrifices made for pursuing a career in comedy.
“As a loyal listener of this show, you're always challenging yourself to grow, to be better, to keep learning.”
Commitment to Craft
46:50 to 50:58
Explore the dedication and hard work that leads to success in comedy.
“I think the theme that I'm seeing about your career and also your life is just you are 100 % all in committed to the craft and to creating opportunities for yourself.”
The Art of Stand-Up Comedy
50:58 to 54:29
Gain insights into the nuances and techniques of stand-up performance.
“Like, imagine me laying in bed as a kid going, someday.”
Mastering Your Voice in Comedy
54:29 to 56:00
Learn how to define and express your unique voice in comedy.
“I have a spiral that says, I think it said something like, first applause break, 30 seconds.”
The Art of Stand-Up Comedy
56:00 to 1:01:19
Learn about the nuances and challenges of performing stand-up comedy.
“I'm not saying like, I'm a storyteller because I love to tell stories, but I got you, man.”
Lessons from a Stepdad
1:01:20 to 1:06:10
Discover the impactful lessons learned from the speaker's stepdad and childhood experiences.
“And it's like we get divorced, but it's a happy divorce.”
Hustle and Resilience from Mom
1:06:11 to 1:09:09
Explore how the speaker's mother instilled a sense of hustle and community.
“I got a couple of final questions for you, but what about biggest lesson your mom has taught you?”
Hustle and Resilience from Mom
1:09:15 to 1:10:18
Explore how the speaker's mother instilled a sense of hustle and community.
“You probably know Square as the thing you tap your card on at your favorite coffee shop, restaurant, salon, or local store.”
Hustle and Resilience from Mom
1:10:21 to 1:11:19
Explore how the speaker's mother instilled a sense of hustle and community.
“Putting the phone down, getting out of my head, and giving the people in front of me my full attention.”
Reflecting on Life and Legacy
1:11:19 to 1:20:08
Jo Koy shares reflections on his journey and the importance of pursuing dreams.
“You said, we're good, you know, keep going.”
Three Truths and Inspirations
1:20:08 to 1:24:00
Discussing what it means to live without regrets and the essence of following your dreams.
“Especially with what we do, I feel like when you say hope, you're asking for something else other than your own talent.”
The First Stand-Up Experience
1:24:00 to 1:27:00
Jo Koy recounts his early stand-up performance and the challenges he faced.
“What was that like when you finally got to that stage?”
Definition of Greatness
1:27:00 to 1:29:08
Jo Koy shares his personal definition of greatness and the importance of doing what you love.
“Because like literally, because it was so depressing.”
Definition of Greatness
1:30:06 to 1:31:01
Jo Koy shares his personal definition of greatness and the importance of doing what you love.
“friend on social media and leave us a review on Apple Podcasts as well.”
Transcript
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2:20Lewis Howes:to work on your most ambitious ideas and projects. Get started at chatgpt.com by selecting work mode available on plus and pro plans. Everywhere I go, airports, events, walking down the street, people stop me and say, Lewis, this show got me through one of the hardest seasons of my life. And it's one of the coolest things when people come up to me. So if you see me, please come up and say hi and let me know how this show, The School of Greatness, has impacted you. It lights me up because our mission at Greatness Media is to impact 100 million lives every single week. So if today's conversation hits home for you, do me a favor and push the follow button right now.
3:02Lewis Howes:It means that the next conversation will be delivered to you and will find you exactly when you need it. Again, thank you so much for being here and listening to The School of Greatness. Make sure to follow right now to stay up to date on the latest and greatest.
3:19Lewis Howes:You know what's crazy? I don't hope. I never say hope. When you say hope, you're asking for something else other than your own talent to get it. That's Joe Coy. And if you've ever caught yourself saying, I hope this works out, waiting on some outside force to hand you your shot, sit with that for a few seconds. Because what if the thing standing between you and the life you want isn't luck, it isn't timing or connections, it's just you finally deciding to bet on your own work. In this episode, Joe takes you behind the mic and behind the mustache drawn on with eyeliner nights when he bombed on stage over and over.
4:01Lewis Howes:You'll hear how he turned insecurity into his greatest material, how he financed and shot his own Netflix special after they passed on him, and why he still hand delivers his own flyers to car windshields, even when the show's already sold out. Joe Coy is a stand-up comedian, actor, and producer with multiple sold-out Netflix specials, including his newest, Blue in the Face. He's shattered box office records at some of the biggest arenas in the world and built a career by simply refusing to wait for someone else's permission to start. This is Joe Coy, and welcome to the School of Greatness. as one of the best in the world at what you do.
4:43Lewis Howes:You transfer energy. Thank you. So well, whether it be in person, one-to-one, one-to-many in front of thousands of people or hundreds of thousands of people in person or to millions of people on a screen, you transfer energy. And it's very hard for anyone to do that well. It's hard for comedians to do that well, effectively, consistently, and it's hard for just everyday human beings to transfer energy well. did you always know how to transfer energy well when you were younger growing up or is this a skill that you had to learn through trial and error or through failure and defeat and trials that you experienced you know what's crazy is when i was a a kid like when i was like five or six i'm not even making this up i already knew i was really funny really yeah it was the weirdest thing because and my mom would always be like oh joe is so funny and my dad always laughed at everything you know and like if they had parties that it i'd be funny i knew that there was a group of people laughing it's something that i would do and then i knew i had that skill set because uh my dad was in the military so every three years four years we were bouncing but i didn't care because like in my head I already knew I'm going to be the funny one in the school like I right away I'm gonna be the funny guy at the school I'm gonna be the funny guy at the school so I wasn't I was never sad that I was leaving a group of friends I was happy because I knew I could get new friends does that make sense yeah it was the weirdest thing and there was this one elementary school called Elk Plain Elementary and I was moving from the Philippines and I remember we were so sad leaving because my dad got an extension in the philippines for another year and we stayed for one more year because we were begging him please don't leave but that was it that was as far as he could get it and then we had to move to uh tacoma washington and i remember i was so sad but then that excite that that sadness turned into excitement because i remember i was like oh i'm gonna be so funny like everyone's gonna like everyone's gonna think i'm the funny guy like i remember saying that now did you think i'm gonna be funny even though you're switching countries and cultures did you believe like oh i'm gonna come to america and i'm gonna be funny yeah you just believed it at eight years old or something yeah yeah yeah really yeah we remember i'm military too so but and and and like the philippines has always been bilingual like they speak english better than americans man you know what i mean like very articulate they get all the humor you know i mean so it was there it was and i was speaking tagalog which was crazy because we were living there and uh my aunts lived there so it was it was cool it was a good time back then and uh but i remember coming back to the stage just like i was excited i was excited to like see like this new school and be the funny guy at the school i swear it's the craziest thing like if you look at my my junior high after sixth grade seventh eighth nine i went to spanaway junior high class clown class class clown like seventh eighth ninth it was always me the funny guy it was and i knew it like right away i mean sixth grade seventh grade that's when i was listening to richard pryor and and watching eddie murphy like i was watching eddie you know do delirious Like already, I already knew I wanted to be a standup comic at that age.
8:16Was there ever a time where you weren't funny? I mean, yeah. I mean, always not funny. Really? Yeah. There's times where you're, you're trying to figure out the audience. You're trying to learn. And I mean, that's all just how it is. That's just, that's, that's what I love about standup is, uh, that moment where you have to figure out, uh, how much you love it. And it always comes out going, nah, I love this. And you just keep pushing.
8:47Lewis Howes:Even if you weren't funny that night or that day? Yeah. Yeah. You just keep pushing. There's just, there's this addiction that we have. I don't know what it is. Us comics love it, but I really love it. I really, really love it. I'll do an arena. I'll get on my tour bus. And this has happened a couple of times. And I'll literally be like, is there an open mic around? And I've pulled up to open mics. Right after the arena. Yeah, I've done it. I've done it a couple of times. It's just a bar with 15 people. 15 people. And all they did was turn the lights down because they don't have a spotlight like that type.
9:25And I love it, man. I love it. But do you ever have periods of time where you feel like you bombed?
9:32Lewis Howes:You feel like, oh, I gave it my all, but that crowd, they didn't really laugh at the jokes and they weren't really as engaged. Was there ever a season where you weren't as funny as you thought and you thought maybe I lost the gift? No. No. You're always like knew you had it. No. If you're talking stand up, no. Yeah, yeah. Never. Never stand up. So was there ever a time where you just bombed though? Yeah. I mean, always, like when we first start. How do you respond to that and not let the negative effects of an audience, if you bomb and you begin, affect who you are as a person and your identity?
10:09I mean, that's what makes us strong is like the failure. Like everyone fails, you know what I mean? But like it's when you don't try is truly when you fail. So it's like if you're thinking about something and you decide not to do it, To me, that's failing. But if the opportunity arises and you accept the challenge and you fail, then you won. Does that make any sense? 100%. Because I know a lot of motherfuckers that pass on because they're too scared to do it. You know what I mean? That's the real failure. To me, that's failure. To me, that's just cowardice. You know what I mean? I don't mean that in a mean way but it's like I think that's what I love about comics so much that yeah we do put ourselves in situations like that and then we do also say oh well we do that a lot and we don't care but some people care right if they bomb they really care about how people perceive them then that taps into a new uh a new era or a new generation of people with social media type feelings do you really care about what they say or do you look at a a sold-out so-fi stadium and go well i guess it doesn't really matter what you said right because it doesn't make sense you know what i mean yeah so that's how i look at it it's like i mean we we live in a time where yeah it's it's like uh things is things are accessible everyone has a voice now and you just take it with a grain of salt yeah it's like what you got to remember it's like we're all supposed to fail you know what i mean like you're not gonna sit there and tell me michael jordan sucks because he lost to larry bird when he scored 63 points i dare you to say it yeah exactly exactly it's like you're you're joking right now when you
12:10Lewis Howes:were starting out i could i think you said you started in the late 80s early 90s kind of when you were starting out in stand-up, right? Was there ever a moment where you feel like, oh, I've made it? When I started, I started at 89. 89, right? Yeah. But was there a moment where you were like, I made it, or I know I'm going to make it? Or was there a period of time where you just feel like, oh man, I'm just grinding on these local shops or local comedy stores, and I'm not seeing the momentum? I never got into the store, the comedy store. I got into the laugh factory and um and then in vegas in 1989 there was no comedy scene that was just like national headliners you know i mean so they never had that open mic there in 89 89 90 all they had was a couple coffee houses back then and it got to the point where i was getting good there was this one nightclub that had uh did a comedy night upstairs where the pool tables were and you know you had to get there before the nightclub opened the nightclub started letting people in at like 10 30 11 so you had to get there at like eight so we'd have a show from eight to ten or something right the host was dating a manager of like a big comedy club in at the mgm it was called catch rising star and he saw me because he came that night and he saw me and literally when i walked off stage right he goes hey uh i'm gonna have you open for a blah blah blah something i forgot the guy's name some headliner i'm gonna give you a week and back then a week was basically 12 shows right it was like monday through monday it was like two shows friday two shows saturday two shows sunday it was the craziest schedule and he gave me like 80 a show right so i think it was like over a thousand dollars i still zero i remember going to kinko's and printing up that check wow i have it somewhere but that at that that moment i thought oh my god i'm about to be a comic i'm about to be a famous comic i thought it was over with at that point i was like oh it's on they got the money coming in yeah i'm i'm a regular catch a rising star i remember calling my dad like oh dad it's it's happening it's happening what year is this 90 oh my god it was like 1994 or something like right around there over 94 so five years in and then nothing happened i think i got it two more times and it was just like oh man and then it just stopped i guess what i'm trying to say is there were several times where i thought i made it really yeah but that's that's the beautiful thing about this journey you know i mean it's like it's a long bumpy ass road with a bunch of roadblocks and a lot of gravel roads a lot of like uh u-turns let's start over flat tires all that like that's comedy especially when you're a road dog it's like it's rough man a lot of i'm not gonna be there for my son's birthday because i really need this money so i took the gig atst charles illinois right in the middle of nowhere amish country you know what i mean i took that gig because i man they're paying me 2500 this weekend so i i i've missed those you know i mean but then at the same time i knew i was winning wow i'm losing but i'm winning and like there was so many like obstacles that i had to deal with mentally and physically you know so it just kept going on every year it just felt like a win and a win and a win and then it was like a loss lost loss i won the apollo showtime at apollo i thought i was gonna blow up and then boom boom nothing happened really then i did def jam got the def jam uh comedy circuit like the uh the tour comedy tour not the one on hbo i got bet's comic view like i thought things were gonna happen for me but it didn't but they did which is crazy and the way i got them was was amazing because i i I never said no to the gig.
16:22You know what I mean? Like the way I got BET's Comic View was crazy. Do you remember BET's Comic View? It was on Black Entertainment Television. And this was in the 90s. It was huge. It's what made D.L. Hughley huge. It's what made Cedric the Entertainer huge. It made Gary Owen huge. Those were the hosts. And I was such a fan. Every night I would watch BET's Comic View. and then uh i was i was a tour guide at the mirage and see you asked that question now you get a long answer so uh so i'm at the mirage and i'm a tour guide when the tour guides was like hey bet's here i go what yeah they're at the the country star it's like some kind of restaurant i'm like i'm there and i literally asked my manager if i can go home early because the show was at eight and I knew we worked until like seven something 30 I need to get home so I was like can I please just get out of here like 5 30 and uh leave early so I can just go home and change and put on a suit that Eddie Murphy said I always wore a suit that's what he always said he goes I always wore a suit when he was like a kid he was like in high school and he was wearing a suit and he goes every gig I got I wore a suit so I was like oh I gotta put on a suit like this is a big gigs so i drove all the way home you know this is las vegas it's like 120 degrees no ac i was a tour guide all day i'm covered in sweat i don't even take a shower i just put this suit on and get back in the car this fake resume that says catch a rising star because i found a uh i found a a folder at catch a rising star they had a stack and he gave it to me the manager gave me a whole stack i'm gonna put my resume in this and i put a resume that i made and a headshot that my dad took it was all of it was awful and i brought it and i went to country star and there was this line wrapped around the building i brought additions no no it was a show like people were trying to get in to perform yeah yeah and i walked all the way to the front and a security guard was standing there and security guards never help right security guards don't give a go wait in line and i i go hey man uh i'm a local comedian and my name is joe coy and i showed him my resume i go uh is there any way i could just speak to the promoter because i'd love to warm up just like if i could do crowd warm up or whatever like a lot of people know who i'm here no one knew who i was and he and literally he looked me at the face i still know what he looks like he was a big heavy set guy with dreads and he goes i'll be right back and and he left he left the door and went and got the promoter and her name was yvette anderson she's still my friend to this day uh swear to god her name is yvette anderson what did you say to her she came right up to the door and she goes uh she goes hi i handed her my resume i go i'm a local comic is there any way i could do warm-up like like i know your show's book but like i could warm up while they're getting ready and while you're sitting people just if i can go up i love bet like it would be an honor just to go up and just warm the crowd up and then she goes oh we already have the show booked and but you know you're more than welcome to come in and i'll hold on to your resume because we're this is a tour we're coming back to vegas and i'll look at your stuff i go yeah i would love to go in right this is like 90 i'm making up a number but it's like 97 right 97 is right yeah yeah so she she brings me to her booth and she sits me down and she's got remember this is 97 she's got cameras like that but studio camera canon like the xlr cannons right like it was i couldn't believe my eyes like on sticks like those too right and i was just like looking at him like oh my god this is real like i've never seen a studio camera before so i'm looking at this and i'm like oh is that it's just this is how they shoot the show man like i was tripping and i was so excited it was just packed and then all of a sudden all the comics are late they're not there this is crazy she says go up she literally and the crowd's going crazy like start this show what the it's 8 35 start this and i'm literally like i'm smiling from ear to ear because i know like bro she's gonna need me because they're not here i'm ready let me go and she walks right up to me and she goes can you go up up swear and she goes can you go up for for like five minutes or until they get here i go yeah i go can you please record it i i go if you record this to be the that's all i want if you record this and she goes hold on let me set it up oh my and she literally set up and press record and she goes can you go she had no one introducing me i had to literally walk up oh by the way i had that suit on so it's crazy i have it all on video no my gosh i have it all on video and i walk up do my set fucking standing ovation shut up this is back in the day when people do the raise the roof and you'll see this one black lady doing this in front it was the coolest thing and uh and i walk on stage and it's bo p who it's like one of my favorite comics that was on bet all the time his name's bo p and yvette were standing right there and Bo P got like that southern twang, got like a Louisiana accent like that and he goes hey man who the f*** are you?
21:48I go Joe Coy man I'm a local comic here he's like okay man that was wow that was amazing you ever watch BET? I go yeah. He goes you on, you on next week. Shut up. I swear to god and I'm literally, I went to work and I go I remember asking my manager I'm like hey I need next week off I'm doing BET comic view no one could believe i got it and now i'm on bet's comic view and then i get uh a standing o on bet's comic view i was number 28 out of 28 i was number 27 out of 28 comics we started filming at 10 in the morning and i don't think i got on stage until like 11 30 that night gary owen gary owen was the host you should bring gary on this show because he's amazing too and gary owen was the host and we never met each other and uh he went up killed i went out there murders i murdered it and then that's how i met uh um just some you know like black comics that were like that were doing things and i met uh a couple guys and that i met this one guy named uh god what was his name oh i met honest john he's a white comic right and honest john was like hey you need to call this guy right he had this thing where he could get you on uh into colleges all right college tour but it was the black uh what do you call it college program whatever like the black colleges yeah not the all black colleges like you know you the the black uh fraternities or whatever so they would hire famous black comics that they saw on bet and def jam right and and they would come perform at these fraternities or something.
23:34Yeah, whatever, right? And they'd be beautiful shows. They'd rent out the theater at like University of Houston, University of North Carolina. Now I'm opening for these famous black comics like Samore and Michael Blackson and J.B. Smooth. Like all of them. This is before J.B. Smooth was on Curb Your Enthusiasm. This is just J.B. Smooth from Def Jam. Wow. Like this is the 90s. And I'm opening for all these cats, right? So now now I'm making money off of this I'm getting like 800 a show right plus they're flying me out right so that's how I got that so now I meet them this is crazy Honest John actually I met Honest John on the black college circuit I met how I got on the black circuit was I think Yvette Anderson right and then uh Yvette yeah she hooked me up and then I met Honest John on the circuit because I opened for him a couple times he was like man you really funny man he's a white guy right he He goes, man, you really funny, man.
24:30He's like, you know who Bob Sumner is? Right? And I go, nah. He goes, man, he runs Deaf Comedy Jam. He runs the tour. He goes, you need to be on Deaf Comedy Jam, man. He goes, when we're in Vegas, I want you to come to a show. I'm going to introduce you to Bob Sumner. So Bob Sumner and Russell Simmons created Deaf Comedy Jam, and they had a tour, right? And they were at Sam's Town, which was on Boulder Highway, right? And because the strip wasn't hiring black comics for anything. Unless you were Martin Lawrence or Chris Rock, you were not getting on the strip. It just wasn't like that. Like, I'm telling you, it was such a crazy time back in the 80s and 90s.
25:16And so they had to go off strip. They had to play these weird rooms, you know what I mean? Anyway, I'm at Sam's Town, and I'm backstage with my sister. and here comes Bob Sumner, right? He's eating something. She's eating like a muffin or something. She got food on his lips. And he's just like, hey, Honest John said you really funny. I'm like, yeah. He goes, all right. Well, this is what I'm going to do. We're going to put you out before the show starts. We're not going to open the curtains. We're just going to kind of open it up and just go through it. Kind of like Carol Burnett. You remember the Carol Burnett show when the girl would walk in between?
25:53He's like, we're going to go through the curtain. and then um don't say welcome to deaf chair don't say uh are you ready for the show and when you say good night just say my name is joe coy good night and then come back through the curtain uh and we're still seeing people all right so uh you know the house lights be on but you know it's it's packed house and i'm like okay and he walks off and i literally look at my sister going i'm i'm gonna eat my out there this sucks right like what the like why am i even here i'm so No warm audience.
26:25Lewis Howes:Yeah, people are walking in. Yeah, it sucked, dude. It was completely cold. And then all of a sudden, the stage man overheard everything, right? And he walks up to me and he goes, hey, man, I just want you to know we're about 89 % full. Like, we're not going to leave the house lights on. It's pretty much packed in there. I'm going to turn it down. I'm not going to turn them off, but I'm going to turn them down. So it's going to feel good. But all the other stuff that he said, you're going to have to do, all right? But I'm going to turn those house lights down for you. Yeah, it was really cool.
26:52And literally these two stagehands pull the curtain like this. And I sneak out. And then a spotlight hits me. Swear to God, dude. And I'm like, hey, I'm Joe Coy. And I do like 10 minutes. Good night. Stanio, right? Wow. Stanio. I did this Michael Jackson bit that I always killed. Stanio. And I crawl back through the car. I crawl back through. I don't say. You don't vault the side. And then he had this amazing set that said Def Comedy Jam. And, you know, they had the turntables. I think Kid Capri was there. It was just crazy. And I couldn't even say I was involved with this thing. Oh, man. And I crawled through the curtain.
27:33And my sister hugs me. He's like, oh, my God, I knew you'd kill it. Blah, blah, blah. And Rudy Rush, he's a comic, a really funny comic. And he hosted the Apollo. And he was hosting that show that night. And he's standing next to Bob Sumner. and he goes who the this guy he goes oh that's honest john's friend joe he goes why the did you put him on now why didn't you put him on the i'm sure i gotta follow this man he goes what did he goes i didn't know rudy looks at me and he goes you ever do the apollo i swear to god bro this is exactly how it went down he goes you ever do you ever watch the apollo i go yeah he goes man i'm producers call you, man.
28:16You got to do the Apollo. You're going to win the Apollo. I swear to God. Do that same set. You're going to win the Apollo. I'm flying out to New York like three weeks later doing the Apollo Showtime at the Apollo. This is like the 90s where they used to move people. Yeah. Yeah.
28:30Lewis Howes:Throwing stuff on stage. Bro. And I won. I won that. Three weeks later. Yeah. I'm on the Apollo and I win it. I did the same routine that he told me. And you crushed. Rudy Rush. Yeah. Yep. Dang, man. Still my friend. I'm still friends with all these people to this day. This is 30 years ago. Yeah. I started 37 years ago, but this around 97, this is 97. So yeah, you're right. Three decades, but it seems like for a decade before, almost a decade, eight years before that, you just had to kind of sneak your way into any opportunity possible. Sneak your way is the right word, but enroll your way. Yeah.
29:07Lewis Howes:Go up to the front of the line, do the thing, say yes, get off work, whatever it took to just say, all right, They're not going to give me the best opportunity. I'm still going to make myself available and ready. And I'm going to do it under the worst conditions if I have to. Yeah.
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30:48Lewis Howes:Those are just a few reasons. Find yours at t-mobile.com slash home internet, where you can check availability and try it for yourself. They're so sure you'll love it. You get Get your money back if you don't. Fastest according to UCLA Speed Test intelligence data, second half of 2025. All rights reserved. Redeem money back guarantee within 30 days of cancellation. The most successful leaders, experts, and bestsellers would tell you the same thing. There's no expiration date on growth. That's why Southern New Hampshire University offers more than 80 online graduate programs With career-focused courses and low online tuition, SNHU's master degrees are designed for your next move.
31:35Lewis Howes:And if you're choosing between a few schools, SNHU is a clear frontrunner. It's flexible, affordable, and career-focused. Progress doesn't happen standing still. Take one step forward at snhu.edu slash greatness. what gave you that courage and confidence to be able to go for it even when everyone else probably would have said uh it's too risky i don't know man i don't know what it what it is i gotta get up there wow i have to and i don't care i really don't give a like if you if you yeah i don't know I really don't know it's my desire it's my passion I know that there's there's something that I'm trying to reach and the only way I can reach is if I keep climbing right wow so if I say no to that then I I I walk back two steps yeah but if I just go one step forward I'm good I don't know that's cheesy saying that but it's it's real like I could have easily said I'm out of here which most comics would have especially that Def Jam moment a lot of comics wouldn't you'll fuck this guy and then they would have just like especially now with the podcast they just talk about it on the podcast and just on somebody yo god you know what you want me to do you want me to crawl through the curtain what i'm better than that it's like so what it's his show right it's not your show it's not your show it's his show and you're asking for a spot like this guy's a promoter which means he paid for that set he paid for the design he paid for ads he paid for these comics to be there and now you're asking for stage time on a show that he produced and so if i eat my on that stage that that that reflects him and that's how i look at it like i don't get offended by it i just get motivated by it yeah like that's why i keep saying if you fail you fail but it's like you you're not you win you win when you fail like there's that that famous michael jordan commercial where it's in black and white and it's just him narrating how all the things that he did that that failed remember that how many how many free throws thousands of shots yeah i missed thousands of free throws game-winning free throws game-winning three-pointers game-winning shots I missed a dunk.
34:02Blah, blah, blah. I failed. I won six championships.
34:06Lewis Howes:Yeah. I think the end is I failed and that's why I succeeded. Yeah. And I don't know what that did to me. Maybe that burnt inside my soul. But you know what I mean? And the interview is like, you got to remember, this is before the internet. So I was literally like trying to discover people like any way I can. I remember reading a Rolling Stone ad on Chris Rock. He would sit there and wait. for time just to get a spot and he was 17 like 18 everyone knew he was a phenom but like he couldn't get stage time because he was only 18 he had to wait till they put the chairs up or something you know same thing with eddie same story i think that's what it was it was like the same story like same thing with eddie like i think he was 15 you know what i mean and then i heard the same thing about Chappelle he was like 15 and I'm like bro I'm 18 I gotta do the same thing they did this is crazy man but how did you get the confidence I don't know because I was so insecure really what were you insecure about um well I everything my teeth were bad I broke my teeth when I was a kid so all my teeth were crooked and broken in half that's why I have fake teeth and um and they were fake i mean i had bad teeth all the way into like until i started making real money like like i think i fixed my teeth when i was like 36 so my teeth were bad for a long time and uh super insecure i had like a short tooth up here because i fell on a rock and it stopped growing i i tell i say it all the time on stage i go it got to the point where i had to like put my tongue in my tooth just to hide it because i because every time i'd smile people always do like this look like oh they'd be scared they didn't know i yeah so i'd always stick my tongue in my tooth and i had to laugh at my own like i would share like share with all their tongue like literally i had to do that and like i was always insecure about my teeth and how i i was losing my hair i had severe sleep apnea with no no c-pat machine at the time like it was just everything i was just super super insecure and i think the only thing that gave me confidence was stand-up wow i knew i'd kill you on stage you know so it's like you had to get on it was my superpower yeah without the stage it was like you had a lot more i felt very yeah you know i had just like this you know traumatic childhood with you know like the divorce with my mom and dad when i was like nine ten you know my brother with his you know his mental disability and just him in and out of like group homes and you know you know hospitals you know what I mean and police coming to the house because my brother's beating up somebody at the house it was just a very negative negative my my childhood was set up for me to fail you know what I mean yeah big time supposed to fail especially the times that we live in like There is no positive reinforcement with what I'm watching on TV.
37:12I'm being conditioned to think of my own race a certain way, which led into my comedy. You know what I mean? You watch cartoons with your friends and every time they made fun of an Asian guy with the cartoon, you know, the slant eyes and the water buckets on their shoulder and they're hobbling around building a train. And here I am. I have to laugh at that because I don't know what funny is. I don't know if they're making fun of me. And they are. You know, I'm being programmed. I'm not thinking about my mom and her feelings and the racism that she's enduring. You know what I mean? I'm just watching it going, oh, okay.
37:46And then every Asian character that's in a sitcom has a heavy accent. These are all like mental conditionings that kids my age had to go through in the 80s and 90s. You're being programmed, indirectly programmed. So it's like, yeah, when I first start standup, I'm like, oh, this is what they want to hear. This is what I need to do. was it more like self-deprecating stuff then well it's just yeah and it was like racist stuff about my own culture and it's just like that's that's the times we lived in and it was okay it was acceptable you don't know i don't know any better i'm a kid in 1994 how old am i i'm 23 yeah you know what i mean like i'm a kid and you don't know you just you just want to be funny and you you were programmed a certain way and you don't know it.
38:34You just don't know that you're being programmed. Until you get older and you're like, whoa, Pat Marina never had an accent. Pat Marina used to chop it up with Robin Williams and Richard Pryor. And he was a badass stand-up comic. But yet for some reason, his roles had to have a heavy, heavy accent when he became Al on Happy Days or when he was Mr. Miyagi. It's like legendary characters, but why did he have to have the accent? like what kind of race is that you know i mean and that that's why it's hard for me to explain to this generation the opportunities that we had back then aren't what they have now don't get me wrong racism is still in hollywood but it was in your face and told to you in your face back then yeah you know i mean when you get a tia career auditioning for a part where you know she's filipino but they're like yeah just you know you know asian accent you know what i mean you know thicken it up but yet you could sing like a rock star that was the role that she had to audition for and a lot of asian actresses that were like bad ass at acting but for some reason those are the only parts that they're allowed to go audition for i'm just saying like the window of opportunity for anyone of color back then that's why i said that on stage you know when I did live at the forum when I said that like not all of us get a fair shake and it's hard to explain this to people because you don't see it you don't see it through our lens you don't understand what we have to go through you can ask any comic that comes in here from my generation like what was it like you know with these comedy clubs in LA and they'll tell you there's the white room and that was the room that we wanted which was the weekend Friday Saturday and we all called it the white womb.
40:25White night. Yeah, man. Wow. It was white night. Ask any comic. If you had Cedric the Entertainer, ask him what night was the white night. Wow. And he'll tell you, oh, that's Friday, Saturday at the improv. And everyone wanted to get into that. Everyone wanted that because that was the night you got paid. That was the night that audience paid. Those were the nights that were completely sold out. But yet you looked at the list of comics that were on and it was all white. unless you were already, you made it, you know what I mean? Then you'll get a Martin Lawrence. Right, right, right. You know what I mean?
40:57Or you'll get a... One person, man. You'll get one. One. But for the most part, it's buried within four or five. And it's like, then you get us, the guys that are trying to talk about my mom and try and also sell you my point of view. But yet, you know, we were always hit with, oh, I don't think they'll get it. Maybe on a Tuesday, you know? It was just like some really indirect racist shit, man. So it's like when you ask us why we will, the confidence in why we do it is because the opportunities were slim and far in between. So when, when you get that call, I'm not going to say no to it.
41:37Lewis Howes:You say yes whenever you can. I have to. I have to. Even though, you know, they're clearly racist. Right. They got in trouble for being racist. Then they're finally going to ask you to do something. And you're just like, yeah. I mean, yeah, this is my shot. Let me do it. I can't say no. You know, so, you know, you see stuff like the comedy store with Fat Tuesdays. And you're like, why was the Black Night on Fat? Why was it on a Tuesday night? Because Tuesday night was the only night that they turned the lights off. Like, who's going to anywhere on Sunset on a Tuesday? But yeah, we'll turn it on and, you know, we'll give it to the Black comics and we'll call it fat Tuesdays and Guy Torrey took the challenge Guy Torrey's all right give me Tuesday night and it went from one it started at eight and and sold them out and then next thing you know they would do two shows eight and ten and then next you know you got eight ten and twelve wow and now you're turning out famous black comics left and right on a Tuesday with lines down the street like it's crazy man it's I don't know I'm talking too much it's all good man it's all good but it's just like those were the shows that i did i would drive from vegas because i couldn't get the weekend yeah with a broken taillight i remember i got two tickets one going there and one coming back and i had to come back because i was at the i was a tour guide that morning with a broken taillight and i got a ticket both ways shut up and i didn't even get paid that much i got like 40 bucks just to do a show with george wilburn and and gary owen and you know like like these comics that i oh joe torrey like all these black comics that i admire at fat tuesdays what is that four hour drive something five back and forth and this is back in the 90s when they didn't have all those now you drive to vegas and there's so many things you can do like every 30 minutes or every 15 minutes or something back then man it was it was barstow san bernardino like and i yeah no ac oh trying to stay up with sleep apnea oh my gosh man just to do a 10 minute set you were doing whatever it took whatever it took yeah i remember i caught the bus the greyhound just to do uh this one uh no i caught the greyhound because i lost my id yep lost my id and i did uh i did uh oh my god what's it called it's such a great room man and I wish I could tell you the name of it, but Comedy Act Theater.
44:14Okay. Comedy Act Theater in, oh God, like somewhere in Inglewood, that area, down that way. Don't quote me on it. But anyway, yeah, I had to catch the bus, bro, back home. From Vegas? Took me nine hours. Oh my God. From LA, from LA back to Vegas. The bus probably cost you more than what you made. Yeah, no, it was cheap. It was like 25 bucks. Okay.
44:37Lewis Howes:You made 20. And I remember I held my backpack like this. I've taken Greyhounds a few times. It's sketchy. That sucked, man. It's sketchy, man. Just to do, by the way, didn't even get paid for that show. I was auditioning. Oh, man. I was auditioning for Guy Torrey. My friend, I hope you're enjoying this episode. And the School of Greatness drops new conversations every Monday, Wednesday, and Friday around money, mindset, healing, manifestation, and relationships. And if you're not yet following the show, then you're missing all of them. Please tap the follow button right now and you'll get notified the moment every new episode drops because the next one might be exactly what you need.
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45:15Lewis Howes:Now, let's get back to the conversation. I see so many good ideas sit in notes apps for months and the people who ship find ways to remove friction and keep moving. For 20 years, building a website meant templates, dragging boxes around, losing a weekend, ending up with something that looks like everyone else's. Well, that's over. You type one sentence, I'm a personal trainer in Denver, and I need a website. And Hostinger builds it in minutes. Then you can change it by asking. Warmer colors. Add this photo. Move that up. No code. No design skills. 10 million websites run on Hostinger, and it's rated 4.7 stars on Trustpilot and plans to start at$2.99 a month with your domain and email included.
46:04Lewis Howes:That idea in your notes app, the website isn't the thing stopping you anymore. Go to Hostinger.com slash greatness and use the discount code greatness for 10 % off. That's Hostinger.com slash greatness and use code greatness for 10 % off. As a loyal listener of this show, you're always challenging yourself to grow, to be better, to keep learning. And Southern New Hampshire University can help. Southern New Hampshire University offers over 200 career-focused degree programs online. Plus, Southern New Hampshire University has some of the lowest online tuition rates in the U.S. So balancing school, work, and life actually feels achievable and affordable, too.
46:40Lewis Howes:Find your degree at snhu.edu slash greatness. That's S-N-H-U dot E-D-U slash greatness. I think the theme that I'm seeing about your career and also your life is just you are 100 % all in committed to the craft and to creating opportunities for yourself. For most people, if there's a four-hour drive, if there's a line they have to wait in, if it doesn't seem like there's an opportunity, they're not going to make the opportunity. It seems like you've spent 30-plus years of saying, I am going to not only do whatever it takes to get in front of someone to make the opportunity, then I'm going to beg, claw, scream, dance, whatever, to show them I'm willing to do whatever it takes.
47:25Lewis Howes:I think that level of commitment and full ownership to your dreams and your goals, it's got to be one of the reasons why you've accomplished so much. Obviously, you need to be talented. Because some people might do that and not have the goods. But you had a combination of the, I'm willing to do whatever it takes, and I have the goods, and I'm willing to master the craft constantly and be a good person. yeah and i think that combination is what sounds like has had you know multiple you know netflix specials what five netflix specials give me my six six next book specials sold out so far sold out some of the biggest arenas in the world on multiple continents and it's because your willingness to do these things for decades yeah before you quote-unquote made it yeah that's what it sounds like yeah and i'll keep doing it i think people lose uh i don't know what it is that they lose but this fire burns inside me man i love it but i remember reading like this article and i'm pretty sure it was aerosmith don't it's either aerosmith or bon jovi i always mess this up maybe i should look it up again but they said that they used to make their own flyers and xerox copy them and they would put it on uh windshields everywhere everywhere they would go to the parking lot anywhere any any mall or a grocery store and i remember after i read that i literally went to kinko's and taught myself how to make a flyer really yeah and and literally i would hand out flyers everywhere and to this day look i can show you a text i swear to you i'll show you a text right now just to prove that i'm not lying uh i asked my my guy that does a lot of my graphics I need 10 ,000 flyers for Netflix because I'm about to pass these out.
49:15Right now? Yeah, I don't give up.
49:18Lewis Howes:So you're going to go and still do it like you did 30 years ago. It's a little different now because I'm selling out places. Yeah, of course. But I got three sold out shows this weekend. Like, you know, they're completely sold out. I'm going to Miami. Why post flyers if you've already sold it out? Because not everybody knows you. That's true. You, you, you've got to be the most narcissistic human being to think that you're that famous. You're not. There's people that do not know you, man. That's fine. They're not supposed to know you. You don't need to know me, but you can get to know me. And when you do, it's up to you whether you like me or not.
49:58Give me a chance. Watch one segment. Watch a 10 minute thing. If you don't like it, that's fine. That's what this is. We live in a world of choices, bro. like the the the i fall under the umbrella of stand-up comedy but there's different genres it's like saying i follow i do music it's like okay what genre music country i don't really listen to country but i'll give it a shot that's what it is so you got 10 000 flyers you're about
50:23Lewis Howes:to go or your team's about to go and pass them out yeah on what yeah everywhere in the city or anywhere you're going on tour everywhere every parking lot i'll have a stack that's incredible man i'll stick it in a car window i don't i am humble and you'll do it yourself too hell yeah if i got i'll have three boxes in my car this is amazing and they will be empty and you'll just put them in windshields just about it i don't care i like that don't care that's amazing and i'll pick them up if you drive it on the ground i'll pick it up i don't care this is amazing man your level with your success you're still doing that type of work yeah that is impressive i don't understand where that inspired i don't understand where the laziness comes from that inspired me like i i love that i dreamt this when i was nine like i i'm still asleep dreaming when i wake up the dream's over you know i mean does that make sense 100 man when someone tells you to do something you're like oh yeah maybe you're right i'll stop doing that bro that You just woke up to nothing.
51:31Wow. Uh-uh. I'll stay. Let me sleep and continue this dream. Wow, man. Yeah. This is all a dream right here. This right here, I'm just dreaming. I'm living my dream, bro. Like, imagine me laying in bed as a kid going, someday. And I close my eyes, and this is what's happening while I'm dreaming as a kid.
51:52Lewis Howes:if you could go back, I guess, 40, 50 years then when you were a kid, when you were going through that traumatic time and your parents getting divorced, you were struggling with all this stuff and you were very insecure. Yeah. What would you say to him if he was sitting right in front of you right now? Oh, you're good. Keep watching those, keep watching those specials. Really? Oh, hell yeah, dude. I watched every special, like I got a master's degree in standup and I didn't watch it for the funny i watched it for the art like how did carlin do that like how did dennis wolfberg do that how did richard jenny do that how did lon how did louis do that how does he those voices how does eddie murphy just command that stage the way he does you know i mean that confidence like what is it i i really like i was a student bro wow i remember there was this one year i can't remember what year it was like 90 something late 90 and comedy central said they were going to do a new year's eve marathon and it started at like eight in the morning and they were going to keep going until midnight and i literally woke up and i watched stand-up because you gotta remember there's no internet and there's no reruns there's no reruns yeah exactly there's no watch it live or so yeah yeah and you had to hope to god that you know i hope they play that again sometime this year well this this was a day they were going to play a stand-up marathon and i remember i got up at eight i was ordering food ask my mom bro i was ordering food it was being delivered and i literally sat there and i watched every half hour special hour special premium blend whatever it was 15 minutes they played everything that night wow and i watched all of them man and i remember my mom i remember my mom and fred my stepdad they were going to a party at like 10 they left out they got all dressed up and uh and my mom looked at me she goes you sure you don't want to come with me like let's just go celebrate new year's eve together i don't know mom seriously i'm good wow like she thought i was pulling like oh he doesn't have friends wow you're enjoying it though bro i was good i had dominoes i got the two liter i got the two liter of coke let's go It's all you need, man.
54:15And it was two pizzas for like eight bucks. I think it was$7.99 back then. I'm not joking, bro. I was killing it. And I was literally sitting on the floor.
54:27Lewis Howes:Are you taking notes also? Or are you just kind of? Yeah, I have the book. Shut up. I have everything, bro. I have a spiral. I have a spiral that says, I think it said something like, first applause break, 30 seconds. Oh, you were timing it too. Yeah. like yeah cadence of it all yeah like i was saying stuff like that you were a real student yeah i was like oh oh that's okay blah blah blah like how many words to set up bah okay oh okay like what are we talking about right out the gate like yeah i was doing that because it's like a it's like a dance when you're on stage yeah in a sense right and you've got to have like almost the timing the rhythm it is a song but it has to be yours yeah you can't copy someone else otherwise no fake right that's why i don't believe in like oh teach a class there is no class like it's it's you who are you you know i mean it's just like asking denzel to teach a class he'll teach you the basics right right but he can't teach you denzel be yourself yeah Yeah.
55:32Like Denzel is Denzel. Yeah. It's true. He's beautiful. You don't need to give him words. Don't give him anything. He'll get you on the first look and you're just like, yeah, well, let's cast this guy. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. What the, did he just do right there? He just looked at me. Yeah. Like you can't, that, that's you. And that's, that's the same thing with standup. What is it that separates you? What is that you want to talk about? What is like, and it can be anything as long as it's your voice. I'm not saying like, I'm a storyteller because I love to tell stories, but I got you, man. Like it's, it's going to be delivered the same way you write a joke.
56:08Like watch it. It's everything that you want. You got the setup, the premise, the punch, the tags, the callbacks. I got it all. I'll go into the crowd and I'll show you how to go into the crowd. I'll show you how to go into the crowd. I got it. I'll do it. It's, I love this.
56:25Lewis Howes:Is there anything about comedy you haven't mastered yet? to me i yeah i think i've there's my particular style i've masked i love it i love it so much and i know how to do it i can literally go up there and just tell you what i want to talk about and i will deliver it the way it's supposed to be delivered it's like if someone puts you on the spot and says all right you got three minutes ready go do you already like have a if you already know like different sets you have time limits stories do you have it all if you're like just going to watch you're not planning to go up i'm so hey we need you now like and you have to go up what would you first of all there's stand-up and then there's a gig i think that's the thing about stand-up that that has this uh weird uh perception right like oh you're a stand-up comic So go inside this broom closet and there's two guys standing there.
57:25Ready? Kill them. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's like, no. Like, you would never do that to anybody else. Like, we're not clowns. Like, you got a bunch of people at round tables eating sushi right now, getting drunk. And you want me to what? With no opener? You want me to what? Like, get stopped. So that doesn't work. no and anyone will tell you that everyone's got one dude i got bro everyone's got you know how many comics you know take these corporate gigs and they eat it they ate it but they take it because you guys pay so much money yeah i i stopped like i stopped years ago and it's it hurts because the audience isn't as engaged no because you feel like a it's a it's clownery it's like these big round tables with big giant table settings and knives and forks clanking and people are asking for more wasabi and you want me to be funny they pay you a big check yeah yeah yeah out of here dude like this is like we have the greatest we have the hardest and the greatest art form when it comes to entertainment you can't you can't with a comic man you can't I say it all the time.
58:46Like any comedian, I will never say anything bad about a comic publicly.
58:51Lewis Howes:But you know how hard it is. Because I know. I don't care what style they do, whatever. It is we, we are a different class and in this game of entertainment. And it's untouchable. It's like, it's untouchable. You can't, you can't with us. Yeah. You just can't. Like you talk about, we have to be therapists. We also have to be psychic. We have to figure out every single person in this room. What's going to make them laugh. And adjust. Wow. In a way. And it's crazy, man. You can have 70 ,000 people in a stadium, but for some reason there's this one cat I'm looking at. And every comic will say that to you.
59:38Who's just kind of like. Yeah. And if there's not a comic that doesn't say it to you, they're not telling you the truth. So how do you deal with it when there's people in the audience? It's not that. One, who gives them? That's the thing. Who cares about that guy or that chick? We don't care. But the thing is, it just bothers you. We'll literally go in the green room and be like, did you see that? The crooked hat guy? What the f*** was that all about? Who the f*** was that? Like, literally, we'll all stand in the green room. Yeah, yeah. Just like, what the f***? We don't care about the standing ovation.
1:00:14We don't, like, it's crazy, dude. And that's the kind of s*** we gotta go through. And we don't sit on the same song. Don't get me wrong. I love to go see live music. I love it. Because every night is different. because the crowd is hyped and you know you get to hear a different version of the song live and it just sounds good you get to hear all the instruments at once live it's a beautiful feeling stand-up isn't like that bro like we're not doing the hits like i can't i can't go up there and be like oh by the way i'm gonna do a live from brooklyn today like they're gonna be everyone's gonna want their money back it's like no bro we've already heard that we want news that's a lot of work to always come up with new material yeah and you gotta give it to them wow that's me by the way like once once this special drops september 15th it's it's such a like a fun night for me because i'm like yo everyone's gonna get to see that routine that i worked on but at the same time it's a sad night because it's like i'll never do those jokes again oh like i'll never talk about my stepdad again after that and i love doing that story i love telling that story on stage but it's done after this it's done i'll never talk about that stuff you know not even like a part of it every now and then even if you yell it out i won't do it really and if you yell it out i really won't do it yeah i just i can't there's no reason man that's a lot of work yeah it's crazy because an hour special to me is like a marriage.
1:01:51Wow. And it's like we get divorced, but it's a happy divorce.
1:01:54Lewis Howes:Oh, man. It's like a happy divorce. I wave to it. And I don't do greatest hits at the end of my show. I don't think that's a... Because you've got six specials now, so it's like if someone watched three of them... I've got eight. Eight, but six on Netflix. Eight specials, but six on Netflix. So if someone watched the first couple and they see the same material, a little bit of it, they're just saying, I already watched this. Yeah, you did that already. Dang. What about on tour? Could you do it at us? Really? Man. I can't. That is a lot of work. Yeah, but I love it. No, I mean, it's great, but it's like, you got to always be thinking of a new material.
1:02:30Yeah.
1:02:30Lewis Howes:That's a hard job. Yeah. But it's not, it's not. It's, it's a lot of fun. Yeah. It really is a lot of fun. Gosh, man. I mean, you talk about people will watch this after the special's out or hopefully they'll watch it, your special after they see this. And you talk about your stepdad and you were telling me a little bit before. You had a tumultuous childhood. You were mentioning a lot of trauma with the divorce and stepdad and the dad. What was the biggest lesson your stepdad taught you that has guided you throughout your life? But my favorite that I like to tell people and smile is fix your bed.
1:03:04Fix your bed. A dirty bed is a messy bed is a messy head. And he was military. You know what I mean? Two purple hearts, two bronze stars and a CIV badge. Your stepdad. Mm-hmm. Yeah. And yeah, when he came into my life, you know, don't get me wrong. I love my dad and things happen. You know, there were fights. We had to call the cops. He fought my dad a lot, you know, and my brother was scary. He was a very scary guy. Small, but he could fight. He was like three cops on his back. Really? And a punch in the back of his head, you know what I mean? Because they won't put the cuffs on. He won't let them put the cuffs on.
1:03:42He'd just look at me like, yeah, they're scared. They're scared. And I remember looking at my brother going, I'm scared. I'm scared. Robert, like, come on, stop. And then all of a sudden, this guy, Fred, comes in, and he picks my brother up and slams him. You know what I mean? Because Fred's like 2 '6", 3", big. And when my mom met him, he was like 275, army grunt. You know what I mean? Like, this guy was in it and wasn't scared to fight, man. And I remember he threw Robert to the ground, laid on him, and he was like, I'm going to lay here, brother. I don't want to hurt you. I'm going to lay on you.
1:04:25We can wait. We'll wait for the cops. We call the cops. What do you want to do? You want to get up and leave? We'll tell the cops that you're gone. We want to lay on you right now. You tell me. Let me go. They let him up again. My brother swung on him again. Bam! Threw him to the ground again. Look, I'm going to do this. I don't mind doing this. We can keep doing this. Wait till the cops are going to go to jail again. We ain't going to see you for a while. What you going to do, Robert? And then Robert's like, yeah, let me up. Let me get the fuck out of here. And he let him up, and we were walking down the steps.
1:05:02He swung on Fred, and then Fred grabbed his hair, hit him a couple times in the face. And I think that's when Robert just looked at him. it's kind of crazy too because i think it was that that wake-up moment where my brother was just like okay i'm not that guy anymore and then robert just walked down the steps and they just walked away and i remember looking at fred because i was uh i think i was like 16 or 17 when he did that and i was just like oh okay we got i gotta i got this guy in my house right now i got someone who's got my back right now so i looked at him different you know stepdad yeah yeah i was like
1:05:40Lewis Howes:This was you were fighting your brother. Your brother was doing this to you. No, he was doing it to Fred. Okay. But Robert always did it to us. He was pulling my sister down the steps. He would, you know, hit me, hit my dad. And, you know, he's scary. But now we got Fred. And Fred's like, oh, we're not playing that here, bro. Wow. This isn't happening in this house. Not while I'm here. And I was like, oh, shit. All right. And that was my guy. I remember looking. I'm like, I'm going to go fix my bed. like you said like this right sir like this right sir wow it's not messy no more sir wow swear to god and to this day you go to my house right now my room's got bags from this weekend just open and all over the place you know my bed my bed nice full pillows you go to any hotel room across anywhere you go see me i do not leave that bedroom unless my bed is fixed.
1:06:36That's great, man. That's Sergeant Fred Harrison. Wow.
1:06:40Lewis Howes:Yep. What about your mom? I got a couple of final questions for you, but what about biggest lesson your mom has taught you? I think what my mom indirectly taught me was hustle. And I think that's where I get it from. Because when my mom moved here, I always tell this story and I feel like I'm on repeat and I feel bad, but you know there was no facebook there was no instagram there was no x there was none of that you know there was no websites you know now you you know you come you come to this country you know if you're an immigrant and you come to this country and you just you want to find a community that that speaks your language eat your food and it's easy yeah literally it is easy just go to maps and type in greek food boom a thousand restaurants right by you facebook groups yeah Yeah, Facebook group.
1:07:28Greek. Friends. Boom. Here we go. You can meet them that day. Find a friend. Didn't have that back then, bro. My mom would go to church on Sunday. We'd all be sitting with her. And she'd be literally looking around, just looking for someone brown that looked like her. And at the end, real quick, Joseph, are you Filipino? Oh, nice to meet you. Next, you know, they're talking. Now she's got this friend. And now she got that friend. Then they started renting out the Knights of Columbus Hall at the church. It was the 80s. And, you know, next thing you know, it's potluck night. Now it's all Filipinos.
1:08:04My mom's going through a divorce. Now it's just her and her kids. So now we just got to find, you know, we don't have family because my dad's family is all we had. And now they're not with us anymore. So now we got, you know, the Portugal's and all these people that are taking us in like a family. And that's why I identify with Filipino culture so much because of that. Like those moments were so special to me. And that's where I was performing. Like I was dancing like Michael Jackson at these potluck nights at the nights of Columbus and see my mom roll lumpia up, you know, our Filipino egg roll.
1:08:39She would roll them up and make a bag of 25 and freeze them and then sell them at work, book these nights at Columbus hall shows. And everyone had to perform and just seeing her do this indirectly is probably why I make flyers. That's cool. That's really cool, man. That's why I rent out theaters. That's why I paid for those specials when I had to, instead of complaining and going public and saying, ah! Wow. Yeah. That's beautiful, man.
1:09:10Lewis Howes:Yeah.
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1:11:09Lewis Howes:Sign up and get 10 % off at betterhelp.com slash greatness. That's better, H-E-L-P dot com slash greatness. You gave some advice to your younger self. Yeah. You said, we're good, you know, keep going. But if you could go in the future and imagine the last day of your life or the last days of your life. You live as long as you want, but it's the last days. Yeah. and your future self is looking back at you right now yeah what do you think he needs to say to you for this next season or chapter of your life
1:11:44man you know there's a comic there's a comic uh that i used to take on the road well i still do uh his name's chase chase du russo and i've said this a lot on stage before but Chase is the one that burnt it into my head and he goes everything that you've done up until this point is a DVD like it's the DVD you made that DVD whatever it is that you wanted was a DVD like everything that you wanted in like your movie you did it here's the DVD of Joe Coy's life boom you made it everything that you're doing now is the, is the bonus features on the DVD. So that hour and 20 minute DVD is everything that I dreamt of when I was a kid, everything that I thought that I, you know, even the ones that I thought would be impossible.
1:12:43Like I remember going off, I could never play an arena. I remember going to see Eddie Murphy. I went, I was like 15 when I saw Eddie Murphy live and it was at the Seattle Coliseum at the time. That's what they called it. And I was sitting there and I was looking up. I couldn't believe how many people were there to see him. It sold out. And I remember like, that'll never happen. Cut to me selling out the same arena that Eddie Murphy was at. And I'm sitting in the same chair and I have my son next to me. Shut up. Yeah. Literally.
1:13:13Lewis Howes:Oh my gosh. I just got the chills. Yeah. It's the craziest story. Wow. By the way, the way I bought my tickets is with my mom's credit card because they didn't have websites back then. You had to call in and her name's Josephine. I just used the accent. I like to get two tickets to eddie merripe boom two tickets were waiting for it picked it up after school swear to god bro and then now i'm at the coliseum and i remember seeing that looking up that's the first time i saw paul mooney perform too and then uh now i'm sitting in the same exact seats where i sat and watched eddie at my show same arena uh and now it's called the climate pledge arena and i'm with my son i just remember put my arm around my son going this is exactly where i saw Eddie Murphy, Joe.
1:13:58It was amazing.
1:14:00Lewis Howes:Wow, man, that's cool. Yeah. But to think like that happened or selling out SoFi Stadium, the way that was nuts. And being able to hug my son on stage and have, oh, that was nuts, man. Wow. So many crying moments at that time. Man, you're about to make me cry. I'm a new dad now just thinking about these things. Especially with what we do, Louis. It's like, it's hard. like whenever you go i'm a comedian right they're like you know but they don't know you right and i don't have a post i don't have a flyer on me and they go oh really oh wow so where where do you do this comedy at and they're like there's so by stadium that's where i do it that's crazy but before that you don't have that you don't have that accolade right and you have to go oh well you know i'm at the improv this show and i do this you know i've opened for yeah and you know when you're a dad with a lot of pride, you got this, you know, my son, you're just like, man, I don't want to say that his whole life.
1:15:02You know what I mean? I don't want to be like, well, you can see me at the improv. Like I do it like every Thursday. Like I want my son to be like, yo, that's my dad sold out so fast. You know what I mean? Like I want, you know, you dream that. Right. And I wanted that to happen while he was in school. Like, it was like a goal of mine. Like, I have to have this while he's in school. I don't know what it was, but I wanted it to burn. It is brain that my dad did that. And I want him to walk around school like, yo. And it finally happened. Like, I remember he was a sophomore when I shot my first special that I sold to Netflix.
1:15:41So I shot it myself. Wow. You know, I've told that story before. Shot it first, then you pitched and sold it. Well, they turned me down. So they said no to me. And, you know, we were like, hey, we'd love to, you know, do this hour for you. And they were like, no. And there's no problem with that, dude. I'm not, you know, like, it's a business. You know what I mean? They passed on me for a reason. Fine. And there's a lot of comics that deserve that spot. And they gave it to them. And I get it. I just had to prove to them that I deserved to be on it. So we got the cameras. We shot it ourselves. and uh and then we we shot it and we brought it to them and then they bought it and i'm glad thank you netflix for everything because it changed my life and when they watched it they were like okay we we get it our bad let's put this on and when they put it on it was a wrap bro it was a wrap when live live from seattle dropped it was over with then they're like what's the next one it was crazy oh yeah like right after i broke mariah carey's record in hawaii wow like 22 000 tickets sold i broke uh the forum the forum record that was crazy first comic to sell six shows out it was crazy and i remember when i brought uh i brought uh my son to the forum when i sold it out the first two times and he brought all his classmates and he was a senior or not senior he was a he was a junior and i remember like yeah yeah man that's cool and i brought him out on stage and i hugged him and all his classmates were there i was like damn what a gift what a beautiful gift yeah so now it's like now i'm on the bonus features of the dvd this is all a bonus
1:17:24Lewis Howes:this is a bonus yeah talking to you joe i want to acknowledge you for even that story right there of like, you know, a lot of people have said you would have already made it by now before this first Netflix special, like you'd toured everywhere. You'd done it. Like you've, whatever you've, you've sold out a bunch of places, but you still didn't have that Netflix special. Right. Yeah. And still that story to me is still inspiring because you said, you, you said Netflix passed. Yeah. And you say, you know what, I'm still going to do the special and pay for it myself and invest in it and I'll shop it to you or someone else if you don't take it.
1:18:01Lewis Howes:And you step, you went to the front of the line and you asked again, just at a different stage. Oh yeah. I didn't even think of that. You know what I'm saying? It's like you had your resume. You said, here's my resume. They said, no. You said, can you give me five minutes before the thing? Can you give up, up, up, up, up? And you just said, I'm going to film it and do it myself then. And then I'm going to show it to you. Yeah. And you just kept showing up. Like that's been the theme for 30 plus years. Yeah. Even when you've been on the top, essentially. Yeah. And so for me, I want to acknowledge you for just being an incredible inspiration.
1:18:32Lewis Howes:Thank you. There's so many people who feel like they have to have everything perfect before they start. Yeah. They feel like they have to have all the school, the credentials, the opportunities, the branding, whatever it is, before they actually get started and launch their dream. Yeah. And you started when you were a kid and you said, I'm going to show up at every stage, every moment and go to the front of the line and ask, can you put me on stage? Yeah. Even when they say no. Yeah. And you're going to keep asking and keep mastering your craft along the way. So I acknowledge you for the incredible inspiration that you are for telling these stories.
1:19:09Lewis Howes:There's so much I want to talk to you about, but I want to get you out of here. And so maybe we'll have to have you back on for the next special. Okay. I want people to watch your special that's out right now once this episode is out on September 15th called Blue in the Face. and it's going to be a banger just like the rest of them, man. This is going to be so good. It's going to be a banger. It is, man. And you were telling me about some other projects that you're working on behind the scenes that hopefully are coming out soon. Don't say hopefully. That is coming out. Yeah. That is coming out soon.
1:19:37You know, I hate to say this to someone like you, but the one thing I never say is hope or hopefully. I don't. You'll never hear me say it. What are you saying? I literally got it out of my... I don't even, it's not even in my brain when I talk. It doesn't even process like unconditionally. It just doesn't come out anymore.
1:19:57Lewis Howes:What do you say instead? When it comes out. When it comes out. When it comes out, it is going to come out. I said hopefully it comes out soon. I knew it was going to come out. Yeah, yeah. It's just about about when. Yeah. Yeah. Especially with what we do, I feel like when you say hope, you're asking for something else other than your own talent. Interesting. To get it. And I don't hope for anything. That's good. I will. It's coming out. Yeah. I'm not a motivational speaker, bro. I love this, man. I love it. I'm not that guy. I just I just know, like, I don't like hope. I hope that works out for you.
1:20:31Like, what does that mean? It will work out for you.
1:20:34Lewis Howes:It's going to work. Yeah. If people follow you, Joe Coy, on social media, they're going to see when all these coming out. This Martin Lawrence project is killer. That's what I was saying. Yeah. Martin Lawrence and I produced this special together, which highlights and showcases top headliners that just have not been given the opportunity. And they are headliners, bro. Like, these are animals. They are beasts, man. I've never seen so many standing ovations in my life before. And I was so happy, man. I was just like, it made me teary-eyed. There was one point where I got teary-eyed. Wow. Because me and Martin literally went through every single submission ourselves.
1:21:16We casted this thing ourselves. Like, we handpicked all 24 of them, and there's no denying who we picked. There's no question. All bangers. Yeah, and any comic that's like, well, I submitted you passed on us. Well, then watch why. Watch why. And no disrespect, when we do another season, we'll look. And, you know, if you deserve that spot, we will get you. But I'm telling you, there's no denying these 24. you're going to watch it and go, all right, yeah. These were good. Yeah, they were good. I got to level up next time. They were good. Maybe I should have submitted a different set or whatever it is.
1:21:50I don't know what it was, but all I know is these 24 comics caught Martin and I's eye. They had the juice. They had it, man. And they shined that night.
1:22:02Lewis Howes:I saw some behind the scenes before we recorded it. It looks pretty epic. Yeah, it's crazy. When that's coming out, people will see that. I'm sure you'll be talking about it at Joe Coy on social media and everywhere else online that you share your content. I've got two final questions, Joe. And again, I appreciate you just opening up and being honest and real about all this stuff. It's so inspiring. I know people are gonna be inspired by this conversation. This question is called The Three Truths. Yeah. Hypothetical question. Imagine you get to live as long as you want. This is your bonus features, right?
1:22:31Lewis Howes:You get to do all the extra bonus stuff, all the fun stuff now. But whatever reason, many years in the future, it's your last day on this earth. and on your last day you have to take all of your work with you okay so no one has access to any of the 50 specials you'll have by then or all the content it's all gone for whatever reason hypothetical yeah but you get to leave behind to the world three lessons three things you know to be true from your life okay what would those three truths be for you three lessons this one my dad said to me, but don't say what if, right? What if I would have done it?
1:23:07Oh man. What if I tried? Like don't ever say what if, just do it. You know what I mean? Be that kid, man. Like be the kid that you are, that kid that, that thought they could fly when they jumped off the roof. I know that sounds stupid, but man, we can really fly, bro. You can do whatever you want. I'm flying right now. Yeah. Not in the literal sense. I'm literally, I'm living out a dream, man. And I want everyone to feel this because it's, it's an incredible feeling. Like I used to stand in the shower and pretend I was winning the Apollo. I'm not joking, dude. And they won it. I swear. I used to do it all the time.
1:23:51I used to self-introduce myself in the shower. Like I used to do this whole intro and live, you know, this next guy. I used to do all that with no routine. I had no jokes. I would just do it. Like, I don't know why I was doing it. What was that like when you finally got to that stage? Insane. Insane. I still remember the bar that I went up at and I lied. I said I was 21 just to get in to do this competition. It was called, oh God, what was it called? Star Mania. It was called Star Mania in Vegas. My sister was in it. She was singing, but she didn't know I was doing the standup part of it. and uh i went to this bar on eastern and tropicana and i drew this mustache i remember i grew my baby hair i grew it i remember i wouldn't shave for like a week and a half until the show and then i and i just made it really dark with my mom's uh eyeliner and i just made it really really dark i looked so stupid man and i wore this big suit i never had a suit before so i think it was like fred's jacket and i walked in there like all confident like this and then the the guy the The guy at the door, he goes, I go, I'm here for Starmania.
1:24:59I'm going to do a show. And they're like, yeah, yeah, come on in. All right. All right, sir. And they sat me down. The waitress came in. I remember, don't order a drink. So the waitress came over. I go, I'll just have a Coke. Oh, my God. And I got a Coke. And there was a Lionel Richie impersonator that was sitting right next to me. And he went up and he killed it. He sang all night long and crushed it. And then he got off stage. And then I went on and I bombed. Really? So bad. And there was this lady at the bar. I was like 18, bro. And there was this lady at the bar, right? It was just a dingy bar.
1:25:34And he crushed. I went up. I did nothing but sex jokes. It was like, blah, blah, blah, and condoms, right? And they were just tanking. It was just not funny. And then my mouth started getting cotton mouth. I was getting all cotton mouth. And then I go, you ever get so cotton mouth that your tongue sticks to the roof of your mouth? Like, I don't even know why I'm even talking. Like, just get off stage, right? But I'm not. I just keep going. And they're like, you ever talk? While your tongue gets stuck to the roof of your mouth? And the lady in the back of the restaurant, because I was talking about condoms, the lady in the back of the bar, she goes, put a condom on it.
1:26:15And everyone started clapping. Oh. And I was like, oh, my God. And I remember I got off stage, and I was just like, I bombed so bad. But the lady, the heckler, got the call back. She got the call. And I'm just sitting there all depressed. I'm wiping off my mustache or whatever. But you know what? That Lionel Richie impersonator, man. I wish I knew his name, man, because I just want to hug him. He said, he goes, man, I don't know what you got, but you got something on stage. He goes, like, there's something there, man. And like, maybe not tonight, but you on stage, there's something. Wow. Isn't that crazy?
1:26:58Lewis Howes:Give me a little confidence boost. Yeah. Lionel Richie. Man, I wish he would stumble on this. And I would love to hug him, man. Because like literally, because it was so depressing. I remember I came home, my mom and Fred were sitting on the couch. And I had that suit on, right? And she goes, ooh, nice suit. Where did you? Were you on a date? And I just literally walked right to the room. Shame. laid there yeah man and i remember i think i forgot who said i think eddie or somebody said i i bombed 18 times before i got my first laugh i forgot who said either chris or someone and i remember just laying there going yeah i got 17 more no way that's swear wow yeah how many more times did you bomb though probably 25 more times really yeah it wasn't until i got to this copy house i remember i joined this one competition it was just it was brutal because i invited everybody to it and you bombed oh tremendously never bring your friends when you're getting started right yeah but then again why not yeah that's true and they're laughing with you no they weren't laughing at all they were just like i remember and i had to leave the same way that all the guests the patrons left so it was just like this walk of shame with your family and just It's like, and everyone that was there is watching.
1:28:18You're just like, oh. No, man. You just got to suck it up. I don't know if I answered your question. That's good. I got one final question. Okay. What's your definition of greatness? Oh, my God. Man, your definition of greatness is doing what you love. If you're doing what you love, there's nothing that gives you that stamp of approval. oh i'm getting millions of dollars because i'm doing this pod that doesn't give you the stamp of approval because you made music there's people making millions of dollars and they hate what they're doing there's people that make a million in one day and hated what they did but it's when you're doing what you love for absolutely nothing that's the true definition of greatness Joe, thanks for being the brother.
1:29:10Appreciate you, man. Love you, man.
1:29:12Lewis Howes:Powerful, man. My friend, I hope you're enjoying this episode right now because we are on a mission to impact 100 million lives every single week. And every follow here on this podcast helps us reach more people. Make sure to hit the follow at the top of this show's page right now. It's the single biggest thing that you can do to support the show and the impact of us reaching you every single time we have new episodes. I appreciate you and I can't wait to see you in the next episode.
1:30:06Lewis Howes:friend on social media and leave us a review on Apple Podcasts as well. Let me know what you enjoyed about this episode in that review. I really love hearing feedback from you and it helps us figure out how we can support and serve you moving forward. And I want to remind you if no one has told you lately that you are loved, you are worthy, and you matter. And now it's time to go out there and do something great.
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From the publisher
Every stage you never took is the only real failure. The rest is just data.
Jo Koy, the comedian who has sold out SoFi Stadium and won Showtime at the Apollo, sat down with Lewis and told the story of driving Vegas to LA with a broken taillight for a $40 set, getting a ticket both ways. He rode a Greyhound nine hours home from an unpaid audition. He walked to the front of a line wrapped around a building with a fake resume and a headshot his dad took, and asked a promoter for five minutes she did not have to give him.
She gave it to him anyway. Three weeks after crawling through a curtain as an unannounced warm-up act at Def Comedy Jam, he won the Apollo. Years later, when Netflix passed on him, he paid for the special himself, shot it, and brought it back to them. They bought it, and then he broke Mariah Carey's attendance record in Hawaii with 22,000 tickets.
He still prints flyers. Ten thousand of them, for sold-out shows, put on windshields by hand. He talks about his mom rolling lumpia to sell at work during her divorce, about his stepdad teaching him that a messy bed is a messy head, about hugging his son on stage in the same arena where he watched Eddie Murphy at fifteen.
This one will make you uncomfortable in the best way, because you will start counting the lines you did not walk to the front of. Jo's definition of greatness is doing what you love for absolutely nothing, and he says he is still asleep, still dreaming the thing he dreamed at nine.
Mixed Plate: Chronicles of an All-American Combo
Watch Jo Koy: Blue in the Face
In this episode you will:
- Hear how Jo Koy talked his way backstage with a fake resume and turned one stolen set into a career
- Reframe bombing as proof you showed up, because you win the moment you accept the challenge and fail
- Overcome the insecurity of broken teeth and hair loss that shadowed him for decades
- Bet on yourself the way Jo Koy did when Netflix passed and he funded his own special anyway
- Redefine greatness as doing what you love when nobody is paying you a dime for it
For more information go to https://lewishowes.com/1986
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