Is It Ever Okay To Kiss Your Friend’s Ex?! Kendall Jenner At Coachella & Wedding Guest Etiquette | SheerLuxe Podcast

0:00Spring just hits different. One day, cold mud. The next, warm sunshine. But the hard-working men and women in Carhartt don't wait for the forecast to get to work. Hatching roads, clearing trails, planting crops. Their hands turn this season's uncertainty into possibility. So get out there. Spring into action. We've got you covered for whatever the season throws your way. Carhartt. Made possible. Today on the Sheerlux podcast, we have a wedding fiend dilemmas coming at you. It can be the end of a friendship. It can be. We also get some advice from a hundred year old, which you need to listen to.

0:42Be kind to everyone. And then she looked at me and went, don't bitch. I was like, oh my God. And is it okay to kiss your friend's ex? Is that acceptable? If you're going to get touchy about someone snogging your ex. Ex, ex, ex, ex. Ex, ex, ex, ex. you're not going to leave the house. The chat is great today. So make sure you subscribe so you never miss an episode and let's get into it.

1:18Welcome to the Sheer Lux podcast. I'm your host today, Josh Smith. My first time, girls. And I am joined by the incredible Lou and Hodge. we're gonna be getting into it things we love celebrity gossip items that are in that shopping basket but before we go any further stop what you're doing and make sure you subscribe to the share likes podcast because babes you've got nothing to lose and everything to gain because the chat is always 10 out of 10 and it's coming at you every thursday isn't it 6 p.m hodge yeah so mark your calendars and subscribe but before we get into this chat guys let's talk about what we're wearing you go first because you've got a killer red outfit on do you like it i love it it's quite extra do you know what i love about this is i came up and i was like all right sporty spice you're like oh i feel like i'm dressed like liam gallagher i think it's better to be dressed like sporty spice than liam well i didn't intend to look like liam when i got dressed but i meant that i feel quite like sporty chic yeah you do i love it i love it this is h &m studio It is stunning.

2:20Do you know, there are so many great high street options of this trend that I think it's definitely the place to pay for it. Yeah. I like the color, I like the red. I love the color. I was saying to one of the girls earlier, I'm obsessed with red color pops at the moment. Just think, it's an injection to your spring wardrobe and it goes with a neutral girlies clothes and I want to get a good jumper, I want to get some shoes, I want to get a bag. And I think it makes you look a bit brighter. yeah totally also nice with pink love red and pink together and what's what about the rest of the outfit and then the jeans are citizens of humanity isla which i love i've had these years i really recommend um because you can wear them with a heel or a flat you work for both and then these old gucci slingbacks and they're stunning slingbacks babe and then earrings are by lorna clip-ons and jewelry paulo signify stacking up hey stacking stacking up i think but if you're gonna go sporty then like you need to go glam yeah 100 % and then a red lip it's Ilya red lip in flame you're giving flame today thanks honey all the flames all the fire emojis for our Hodge Lou talk us through well mine is incredibly neutral in comparison I've got this suede collarless blazer from COS tea is CDLP the best basic that's a great tea the best basics ever is it a tea it's like a baby tea okay cute tailor trousers are also COS This belt needs no introduction.

3:49Shoes are Steve Madden. And earrings are, I think they're Pandora. They're great Pandora earrings. You look super chic. You do. I mean, we couldn't be more of sense. Well, me and Josh are quite blended. We're going to celebrate today. I'm wearing an M &S tee, like knitted tee. You know me, I love my M &S. You love M &S. I love it. You really do. It's actually me and David Gandy, the face of M &S by this point. But they pay him. They don't pay me. guys Marks and Spencer saw that out and I'm wearing Reese trousers and a little Berkey I've got the feet out like I've got the ankle out the temperature is rising the ankle's coming out I'm like a Victorian lady dusting down that ankle I did have open toe shoes on but I thought it's too early for me to get toes I wore netted shoes the other day and it was breezy on my toes and my feet you can get the ankle out just not the toe no it needs to be so tight honestly my skin was so pale it was basically translucent yeah and i need to sort that out the foot of casper the friendly ghost i need to scrub can we also talk about what's on your face because your skin is so glowy oh my god that's actually one of the key items so that's going to come up later in the show so stay tuned for that guys so make sure you keep watching and listening until that point

5:06what are we loving guys this week let's get into it hodge i've got two things one is a book I've just read by Emma Jane Unsworth and it's called Slags ooh Slags we love a slag I know it makes me want to say slag slag or like that clip from EastEnders remember when she's like I'm not just a slag slag slag cut slag as someone who was reformed slag myself now I'm to be married I know we were talking about we've all been there we've all been there some of our best times no shade I think you need to do that to then know what you've got. Exactly. And then there's no point that I'm with Tom when I'm like, oh God, I'll give that one a go.

5:47Because I'm like, done it. Probably done them already. Bot ticks. I know. I think it's good to sort of branch out. Yeah. I definitely think in my 20s, the best thing I did for myself was, you know, try all the things in the picnic. Do diligence, babe. Do diligence. It's research. I'm a thorough researcher. And that is what I dedicate myself to in my 20s. because some of my like some girlfriends who were single and then you know in their 30s like we had a conversation on the day with one of our friends and i was like don't like waste this time being worried that you're not going to meet anyone yeah because mate have fun now because when you meet somebody you'll look back and you'll be like oh how annoying yeah i didn't sort of grab life by both hands i also think if you're literally by both hands yeah i think if you're projecting happiness and confidence then people are drawn to you anyway so it's sort of a cycle but i do also think that then if you do meet someone who feels really special don't be scared by that and think oh my god i haven't i haven't done that thing where i've like met loads of people and like been out and had loads of fun because i think you can also be in that side of it and think oh my god am i missing out actually you've got what you wanted and you need to appreciate that yeah yeah 100 % so this slag book it's quite sort of you know raw and funny and but it's also got some like sadness beneath it it's basically two sisters and it's set in time when they're like young so Sarah the main protagonist she's 41 and she's 15 in the book Sarah is now single at 41 she's looking back on her childhood at 15 and the things that happened to her and which had you know led her to where she is in her current life and her sisters young sister's about 240 so they embark on this sort of tour around scotland it's just sort of quite nostalgic because it's like it's looking back at like crushes on teachers like being obsessed with boy bands you know one of sarah's friends in the book goes and stands outside a pop star's house every day after school because they live locally you know she thinks she's gonna marry that pop star and she goes to their concert and she's like wants to fight other girls because they're holding signs up because she's like that's my fiance like how delusional you are at 15 how grown up you think you are but you're not it's about sisterhood it's about friendship it's like everything i love in the book yeah also i love those moments when you have a little think back to what you were like and those nostalgic moments are just so because you think you know it all don't you at that age and you know yeah literally absolutely nothing nothing just imagine meeting yourself at like 15 and having a conversation with yourself and what you think like i read back on my diaries and honestly like i want to crawl under the table and like never come out again what's the cringest thing you've read in your diary oh my god it's honestly just like the way i write it like and i'm trying to work out if i was like angsty yeah but if i was like trying to write like a diary or if like that's actually just what came out of my mouth i think I think I would write my, I used to write a diary, but I wrote it as if somebody was going to read it.

8:54But you were like Bridget Jones. Yeah, exactly. I was trying to project something, even whilst writing my own diary. But I think just at that time, just anything major feels like the biggest thing ever that is going to happen. You just can't imagine looking past. And I think back then also, I lived so much more in the present. I think now I think so much more about what's going to happen then and consequence and you know five years and whatever but you're so this is my life right now but isn't that kind of great like i feel like we should go back to that a little bit more about living in the present because i really tried to do that recently like really ground myself in the moment just like enjoying it rather than thinking what's happening next what's the thing after that what's the thing after that so it's good to keep that energy in a way and enjoy what's happening you always give the best book recommendations i really enjoyed it but i mean it's not in my sort of top 10 books of the year but it's it's worth a read okay um but it's quite sad in some ways as well it's sort of like you're on a roller coaster of emotions i love a roller coaster yeah yeah yeah but it is good and she's yeah she's you know notoriously a great writer so i check her out okay and then my other thing is on a more sort of light-hearted note is we went to the fat badger in notting hill the other day have you been no oh my god it's so fun and it's above canteen in notting hill so it's on portobello roads is quite cool you look out onto you know um iconic portobello road but it's you go up three flights of stairs i mean don't go if you have trouble with stairs because it's right it's not for you i'm like holding on i'm in heels the food is delicious like so yummy quite sort of like steak and hearty yeah hearty but white tablecloth you know amazing martinis amazing margaritas oh I'm now in my martini yes I'm doing it for the first time it's so hot I love my it's also just so great because you have to sip it yeah because I'm a guzzler yeah when it comes to a drink I'm like yeah me too where it's like a martini if you're guzzling that you're in trouble I know my girlfriend Laval Lou Prescott she has two martinis with a Diet Coke oh that's an iconic diet as in she mixes them or does she have the Diet Coke in the martini imagine she has a martini and then she has a diet coke okay and then another martini because I think the sugar and then that's her done no in terms of booze yeah okay oh I'm obsessed with that we had we were out for dinner the night and she had three martinis and she was like I should not have I should not have gone for the I should have gone for another DC we were making friends with everyone in there um but it is really fun because basically what the best thing is is that you have dinner you need to put the early sit and go for 7pm and then you go downstairs and there's a country and western band in the bar below.

11:41That is nothing I love more than dinner and a band. It is so fun. It's not done enough. On holiday, that for me is so peak. And why is that just not in real life? Who doesn't feel so much more jolly when there's live music surrounding you? It's like Counting Crote. It's really like... Oh, I love this. I love Counting Crote. I know. Doing your line dancing. Yeah, and everyone's sort of cool. You'll definitely see some celeb spots. Is it always country and western Or does it change It's always country and western And Quentin Tarantino Is on our next door table What That's a really big Celeb spot Yeah What did he look like It was like the same Yeah Who was he with He was with A woman who I recognised And then a young boy He must have been When I was 21 Who was super hot And I was like I definitely think he's Like charming him To do one of his films Oh So basically You went on night out With Quentin Tarantino Had some martinis Yeah Another five times And the dancing is so fun.

12:38Also, they do margarita by the jug, which I think is genius when there's a group of eight. So you can order it to the table as a jug? Yeah, in the pub. I'm obsessed with that. I know. Because there's nothing worse than trying to juggle through. Do you know what my problem is? I'd be like, I'll take that jug with a straw. That's what I used to do back in the day when I was in like Wetherspoons. Do you know what I used to get the jug? Yes. And I would like have a picture of sets on the beach and they'd be like, how many glasses? I'd be like, one straw bag. And I'd be like walking around Wetherspoons in Cambridge being like this.

13:07At least you had a straw rather than drinking from the jar. Yeah, but it was only like$6.99 back in the day. Scoop. The economy isn't what it was. Lupe, what are you loving? Well, mine is now not as fun as that. So I have, I have not read a book in three years. Like, pre-having my daughter, I loved reading, but only ever when I was a holiday. And then she came along and just, I don't know. Destroyed it. Literally. I don't know how you get to sleep. I struggle, I'll be honest. How do you like close your eyes though? What do you mean? As in, do you listen to a pod for your sleep? Yeah, if I can't sleep, I have this like sleep hypnosis.

13:43Okay. Do you mean you don't listen to the She Likes podcast to go to sleep though? Not for sleep. Which is a really great idea. So subscribe for that reason. Anyway, and my dad and my brother both recommended this book called The Midnight Library, which is by - It's so good. Have you read it? Yeah. Matt Haig, right? Matt Haig. And I'm halfway through, which I'm really proud that I've actually got that far in like 24 hours. and that's massive thank you babe you've done that in 24 hours yeah i love how you've gone from not reading i know doing like a pb i know well i just i just like snuck myself off and then i got really into it and when i get really into things i'm just like in the zone yeah anyway i'm really enjoying it's so far it's quite sad but i'm hoping it's gonna turn it gets hopeful okay so it for those who don't know it basically tells the story of a woman who is having a hard time with her mental health she decides that she wants to take her own life that's not a spoiler that's kind of from the beginning you feel like it's building towards that and um she kind of talks about the kind of successes that she could have had in her life and at every point she feels like she's ruined it and nothing's gone her way and she doesn't have friends she doesn't have life and so she wants to end her life and then um at the point at which she does that she goes to this place called the midnight library where she is basically greeted with all the books which are the potential of what her life could have been and she has an opportunity to read these chapters and these stories to see had she decided to got married to the guy she pulled the wedding off for what her life would have looked like and she can read it and decide whether she wants to go and live in that world is that right yeah yeah um so good what good premise yeah it's sort of giving me about time it is a bit like that which is one of my favorite films so sad ever um and i think what i'm getting is that it will be that you have to appreciate what you have on the present day and not always be thinking you should have done something different yeah matt hager is an amazing author but he has so open on social media about his mental health struggles and depression and suicide and he really pours everything he's learned from his experiences into these books yeah and you go on these incredible journeys and you come out the other side of it it's almost like a self-help book tied up with a novel i feel getting that vibe it's amazing yeah also speaking of novels something i am loving yeah is the adaptation of the testaments have you ever read the testament no so it's the sequel to the handmaid's tale by margaret atwood by margaret atwood um i did that at a level oh my god the tv adaptation of it is on disney plus right now three episodes have just landed it is one of the best tv shows i've watched in such a long time do you need to have watched the handmaid's tale no no it tells you a little bit about gilead at the beginning and sets it up you could watch them completely independently okay and this one's a bit more like YA it's a bit more like young adult so it's a bit easier going than Hamay's Tale but it's still really dark and it like catches you out and you're like whoa oh okay great I need something new Chase Infinity and this new up-and-coming actress called Lucy Halliday yeah who is actually Scottish and I couldn't believe it she plays she does the best American accent ever I'm obsessed with Chase Infinity oh my god they those two are amazing and the concept is it follows these commanders children and it starts maybe about five years after the handmaid tale finishes and it follows them as they basically join a revolutionary group to try and get gilead down and it's everything you want well everything i want from a tv show female-led empowering it's gonna make you really want to like stand up use your voice yeah it is such a good tv show i'm addicted like me and tom started watching it and we were like oh let's give it a go and i was like play episode two immediately I need to know I love that you get so into something and I think it has the ability to transform the way that you feel about yourself and your life and how you want to be living it and how you interact with people it's so empowering to have that and I think I think we spend too much time on social media and looking at other people's lives and all of that and obviously there's a place for that line but I felt like I've been going down just this infinite scroll that i'm tired and i just need to kind of use my brain elsewhere and actually when you get into something like that it's so much better and it's so timely right like when you look around the world women's rights being taken away left right and center so it's such a good timely look at our society even though it's fictional yeah and i think that's something really good to like focus on and think about how you want to use your voice in those situations right let's get the equality going girlies join me yeah it's such such such a great show disney plus i think every episode i think it comes out every wednesday so first three episodes up there now now on to fashion and beautify yes what is in that basket what are we loving lou i'm having a real like stalemate with my wardrobe at the moment i feel like you would You never know by looking at you, babe.

18:55Thank you, thank you. And you love spring. No, I hate spring. I mean, you love autumn. Why do you hate spring? I'm just an autumn winter gal. But you prefer spring to summer. I prefer spring to summer, definitely, because I love a good trench, I like a light layer, not too much skin on show, like a really good shirt, like that kind of works. But I don't know, I feel like I haven't transitioned out. I feel like the weather's been flip-flopping and it's still quite cold. And I don't know, I feel like I just need, I need to go around Harvey Knicks and have a look at everything and just find my new inspo.

19:29And I just feel a bit like I've worn the same things for so many months now. And I'm bored of it. Yeah. I feel like I'm finding it hard to put outfits together. Yeah. And just feel like re-inspired. Yeah. But we did a, I think a Zara unboxing last week. And I came across this really cute, it's kind of like a burgundy brown, cropped leather. not a bomber and not a blazer just sort of round neck little jackets yeah so cute it was so cute it had this little like cinched in at the waist it was real leather and just felt like a really nice piece that would just interject a bit of newness but not fully like while you're in spring a little bit of an in-betweeny outfit yeah lush I love an in-betweeny outfit also a jacket that can take you across those seasons is so crucial right now and also just the ease of a really good jacket where you're like, do you know what?

20:21I can wear the same trousers, the same tee and just put this jacket on and that feels interesting enough. And also you can wear it, it's not like it's a trench and then you can't wear that in the office because that can't really be your outfit. Whereas - If you're walking around in a trench in the office, it's giving flasher. Exactly. Do you know what I mean? Exactly. It's a shame though because the coat often is the outfit. Exactly. I think that's why I love it in winter and when you go on city breaks and you're like, it's okay, the outfit can be the trench. Like when we were in Paris, I had this amazing trench and that was the outfit that was fine.

20:53When you're in the office, you can't have that. So to find a jacket like yours where you can wear it and not be weird like wearing a ticket jacket. Are you cold, babe? Exactly. So yeah, it's that. Well done. It is so nice. And I love, and I think burgundy, like sort of that dark burgundy is so handy. I love a burgundy at the moment. Yeah, and also it goes with black, it goes with denim, it goes with cream. It's a really versatile staple color for your wardrobe. yeah get on the burgundy guys lodge babes icy blue is one of the colors of this season and by melina i've got a lush like tweed blazer but it's quite tight fitting and i quite like it round to the neck or if i'm feeling saucy i will when aren't you yeah it's the crucial thing i will make it into a v i'll wear it just on its own you see fold it down yeah like inside so she's very versatile this piece yeah but she's a good color she goes conservative yeah to saucy i also have got these trousers i keep seeing everywhere but i don't know how to wear them they're the systems of humanity cargo oh yes cargo you're gonna go everywhere you've got cargo pan yeah i cannot imagine you in a cargo pan no but they're sort of they're not super baggy right they're like more barrel nice with pockets or is it just they're like tight pocket do you know I mean, they're not.

22:14So how would you fashion it? I think from what you were saying, that when you've got something that's more like practical and technical, then you need to add the glam. So I think like doing it with, you know, a polished, really clean, crisp white shirt. Yeah. And then a heel. I was thinking that like a billowy shirt. Yeah. With like a mule. Yeah. And then a big earring. Yeah. Oh, I can't wait to see this outfit, babe. Send me a pic. I know. I will. when you got it on now speaking of you because you're asking earlier about my glow yes i have discovered a product that i am so obsessed with it's the sarah chapman overnight facial it's so good guys really it is like the night cream of dreams yeah it is it's a game changer for my glow like ever since i've also been to antigua yeah i've also got a green turn on drink drink a lot and i did drink a lot and i did a lot of damage to myself inside out so for me to come back from that trip and having a glow i'm putting it down to that sarah chapman overnight facial it is the best product i've used so long but you do your normal night care like if you were using a retinol would you put it on over the retinol i don't use retinol i'm very like i don't use anything that aggressive on my skin so it's literally the only thing i put on my skin at So I do the cleansing.

23:35Okay. And then I put that on. And then I swear to God, I wake up every day and I'm like rubbing my skin. Oh, shit. I need to get back on it. It also smells so incredible. And it feels luxe. Yeah, it does. You know when you're putting a project on, it is a bit pricey. But you feel like you're putting on an expensive product that actually works. Yeah, 100%. And that's my pet peeve. When you've got an expensive product, you put it on, you're like, oh, I just feel like an experience. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Or when it's so thin and you feel like, you know, you have to do this like five-step routine with loads of things.

24:04you're like how am I supposed to know which one's working yeah whereas I think when you strip it back and use a few things and that is the efficacy of all the products within that is obviously working wonders babe because yeah I also wore beige on purpose today to make the tan really pop this is called it this is my main accessory today is the tan yeah yeah yeah I mean that was remember as soon as you came up from holiday it's like I'm gonna wear white but it's so funny because I went back the first ever post that tom made us as a couple which was so funny and the caption was we're gonna need to work on his tan because i was like casper the friendly ghost like i'm not joking i was so so pale because i used to hate relaxing hated it i used to hate lying in the sun because i was like up and out yeah it wasn't holiday i literally used to go out and get annihilated during that's my type of holidays i'd go out all night then sleep during the day and then resurrect i was like the dracula of like Magaloo.

24:59So white. So white. And so Tom was like, we're going to work on this tan. Literally, I hosted this event with Dal Goodrum the other night, Iconic, throwback. Yeah, very. Walla woman. And Tom looked at this picture of me and went, my work here is done. Because my tan was popping. So I'm thrilled with it. Do you use fake tan too? No. You've never? Never used fake tan. Really? I used to have like the odd like fake tan situation done by Jules. Yeah. Yeah. and I didn't really love it because I was like I hate the biscuity thing and it was just like it just didn't feel right for me now I'm like I totally understand why people need tans because I feel 10 out of 10 million dollars I feel like you should try it again maybe like try a different formula because I feel like they've come on so much on biscuity that's what it was like we're talking like 10 years ago last time yeah and they were bad back then like the smell was yeah and you don't like a lime down here yeah yeah I feel like I sometimes still get that so maybe I might go into my fake tannera when this starts fading I always feel so much better when I put some tan on.

25:58Same. But I just can't believe the difference it makes to your confidence. Oh, it's unbelievable. I was just like a pale, uncompetent boy before. Yeah, but you get a spray and you're walking around the house like you're a fucking supermodel. Like the way that it just, it just transforms your body. Are you walking around the house like barely wearing anything just to be like a supermodel? Well, when you've had a spray at home. Yeah, you have to. You kind of have to. Like you're wearing these like tiny little things, these like net pants and then you kind of have to let it dry and when I've got mine, and it's like right opposite the massive mirror.

26:28And I'm like, hey, cool. I know. You feel hot. You feel hot. You feel so much better. I would never go on holiday without having a tan. Before? Yeah. That's bizarre to me. Yeah, same. I know, I would never. Because aren't you like ruining the opportunity to tan? No, because you tan through it. Through the fake tan. You never look awful. Also, just like the confidence, like the thought of just walking out onto a beach, pale as. I mean, there's no point going on holiday. And also you're wasting like four outfits. because they don't look good you literally not yeah all outfits just look shit yeah and then you look good on the last two days yeah what's the point but also my other problem with that is is the body looks better when you first go because from the time i've got to the end of it i bet god knows how much stuff like literally in antigua i think i was like 99.9 run punch before i yeah i was like having it like 11 a.m you know what i mean i was like it's run punch though oh my god how good is jamby hut oh my god so i went to this place if you ever go to antigua you have to go to the hut tom was on fire to see the dancing was so good he literally had all of the waitresses in the hut surrounding him he was like had a girl group and he was doing routines with them it was like a 360 experience it was like dinner and a show oh my god which is my favorite kind of dinner exactly and i feel like my natural habitat is a beach club i feel like that is where I was born.

27:51I love a beach club. It's just nothing better. No. Nothing better. It's so fun. And you know, I just love the ones where you know you're going to be dancing on the table. Yes. And my favourite thing is I just love whipping my napkin around. Yeah. Like my head. Yeah. It's just my favourite thing. It's so nice. It's so fun. Nothing screams freedom like that. Yeah. That is the, that's summer to me. And you know there is a hut on the Isle of Wight. Yeah, we've done it. Have you done it? I'm desperate to go. We did it last year. I remember when you did that. Is it amazing? you go for the day so you get the train from southampton and then you we got a rib across which i wouldn't recommend because it is very dicey and wet and you sort of you know we were like glammy and then you end up looking like a drowned rat oh my god whereas you can just get a ferry which you know is not as glammy but they drop you at a proper period at least your makeup But we all carried, you know, all the husbands as a carrier.

28:46Oh, God. Anyway, it is so fun. It's like, it's the best equivalent to like a beach club in Ibiza or Sancto Pei or Mykonos or wherever in the UK. I'm going to do a pilgrimage. We went on like the 8th of May last year. So we were super lucky because it was really hot because you need hot weather. Because you want to be outside. Oh, babe, if you're in there and it's like raining, you're like, this is a damp sky. And everyone is up for it. it's so fun also isn't that just the best thing when you go out and you know that every single person around you is up for it because it's not like that anymore but then getting the rib at 8pm on the way back to get the train to Waterloo I bet that train back to Waterloo was loose how many tinnies you can swim on there we made friends we were singing and dancing oh my god but it was you like we woke up the next day you feel like you've done a marathon because like getting there and then getting home anyway I highly recommend you almost like Like we were saying, should we do it again?

29:43But I wouldn't. And like, should we stay over? But like, almost the fun is going back. Yeah. That's like the drama. I feel like sometimes you have those moments and it kind of catches you off guard and you can't really recreate it. It's just like that moment in time. We went to Comporta, maybe not last summer before. And it was kind of off season anyway. We like stumbled across this beach club and there was this group of women, maybe in their like early 60s. And I think they would, we thought they were celebrating something and they were having such fun time and they're like dancing around and we were like, is this someone's birthday?

30:14And they're like, no, we're just celebrating life. I love that. I love that. It was so amazing and they were just dancing around and I don't know, Bobby was like two and they just picked her up and they were just dancing with her. Oh my God, I love. I was smiling from ear to ear just watching these women just have fun in their life for like no apparent reason. It was just so sweet. Oh, I love that. That's what life's about. Can I say the closest place you can get in London to that atmosphere, have you ever been to Mamma Mia the party? Guys, if you haven't been, it's at the O2. I'm going to put this down here.

30:46I think it's one of the top five best nights out I've ever had in my life. No way! I had so much fun. It's way better than Fat Tony's brunch for that food. I mean, the food is not the best thing about it, but still a substantial meal. And you need it because you're going to need to line your stomach. And it is so iconic because you go in and you feel like you're going into Greece, into like a Greek restaurant. Wow. And then there's like, there's a faint storyline to it, which is hilarious. And then they do all the ABBA songs, all the Mamma Mia songs. It is the best fun ever. It's like napkin waving.

31:21It's dancing on top of the tables. And at the end, it ends with like an ABBA disco. And you're just like there being like, you can dance, you can jump. I think the theme of this pod is that we like summer where we could go for food and then dance. And then dance. Have fun music. And just like bring all the vibes. and also like that just come from the vibe of the room rather than like the chat what you're doing just like fun I'm joy first this year yes like I'm leaning into it and going back to what we were saying earlier about your teen diary being more present yeah I'm just gonna go that have a great time 100 % think about anything else good sleep is everything that's why Ollie's science back support is made with a blend of melatonin and L-theanine for both kiddos and grown ups so when your mind won't switch off you've got something that can help you're racing thoughts and restless nights won't stand a chance.

32:11Find Olly Sleep Solutions for the whole family at olly.com. That's O-L-L-Y dot com.

32:25Can we also talk about, was it your grandma or Tom's grandma? Her words of advice about being happy. Oh my God. So Tom's grandma turned 100 years old last weekend. And we went and gave her a little party and it was so sweet. sweet and obviously tom wasn't tom wasn't dancing on top of the table in the old people's side be like let's go girls all them dancing around in their cinema frames if only it had been iconic and of course like obviously you know i love a deep chat so i wasn't going there just to be like oh how's your birthday margaret i was like tell me what the greatest life lesson you've learned is in 100 years and she said it was so iconic because she said the classic thing about like be kind to everyone and then she looked at me and went don't bitch i was like oh my god and she literally looks 70 so maybe the secret to aging well is not bitching because it's clearly true and then she went really deep and she was saying that actually as you get older people are less less kind to you as you get older and she was like saying that what we also do is we rely too much on other people for our happiness and you have to to find happiness within yourself.

33:34And I was like, Margaret, that is so profound. It's so beautiful. I so agree with that because I think sometimes we can put so much pressure on a situation or somebody making you feel a certain way in a situation or like all these life moments and actually it - Yeah, your expectations. It's your expectation that you're projecting on someone else or some situation. And actually, if you then are projecting what that you think that should be, it's not really taking in what it actually feels to you. And I think it's so important that we take a step back. and think what actually makes me? Yes. And how can I do that for myself rather than relying on other people to make me feel happy?

34:10I do think it's difficult though, because you're so right, we put too much expectation on others, and then you're only gonna be disappointed. One thing I've done recently is stopped putting expectations on people and just letting go of that. And so I'm like, okay, you do you, hopefully you turn up, we have a great time, but I'm not gonna expect you to be this kind of person, or turn up and give me this kind of energy. just let go of it and make sure you're turning up for you exactly and then the rest can just follow and I think if you're you're acting and like responding to things in the way that you believe to be right not because it's off the way someone else is being then as long as you've been like you then yeah and you can exactly and you are completely happy with your actions yeah and can justify those to yourself totally be more accountable I know and I think it just everyone has got so much going on it's just not always about you that's the biggest life lesson it's not about you yeah and the people aren't thinking about you as much as you're thinking about yourself and everyone is thinking about that about themselves so everyone else is in that scenario and i feel like once we let go of that and it's like we are all the center of our own worlds yeah i think what's also was so special about that moment is she had so many cards and for a hundred year olds you'd be like wow and there were so many people from different stages of her life who remembered her and sent her a card and it really goes to show you never know how you're affecting someone so turn up, be yourself live by great principles and then the people will come along on that journey with you and you won't be forgotten it was really special shout out to Margaret we should get her in imagine do some TikToks oh my god obsessed now before we go on to celebrity news guys, I'm not above begging make sure you subscribe to the show because you never want to miss out on great chat like this do you guys all the life lessons all the life lessons so many

36:12now celebrities it's been a busy week for those celebrities hasn't it there's a lot going on there's a lot going on what has stuck out to us what have we been gossiping about lou you want to talk about snogging yeah so jacob illawdy and kendall jenner were supposedly snogging at coachella i know hot hot hot very tall babies the men that she has been with wow yeah she's got top tier taste she has but you can have top tier taste when you look like exactly exactly anyway um she was also well he used to go out with kaya gerber also the most beautiful woman in the whole world she is beautiful i think she is i think she's my number one yeah is she your number one yeah i think she is so beautiful yeah like breathtaking absolutely yeah just unbelievable um anyway my question is do we think it's okay to snog your friends ex it's been a long time i think it was like six years ago they were going out but six years for me feels fresh yeah i might be in bad but that feels like it feels like two minutes ago but i feel was it a serious relationship because she went out with...

37:19Austin Butler. Austin Butler for ages. Yeah. After that. I think she's had multiple relationships since. I think there was like maybe six months that she was with Jacob. But still, like there's history there. Is that acceptable? I think it's an interesting one because I think in gay world, especially in London... Everyone's snogged everyone. Everyone's snogged everyone. So if you're going to get touchy about someone snogging your ex... X, X, X, X. X, X, X, X, X. You're not going to leave the house. Do you know what I mean? You can have no friendships left. I do think it depends how deep it was.

37:50And if you were also close to that person. And if he dumped Kaya. Yeah. Like I feel if Kaya dumped him. Then it's fair game. Then she might be like. Oh, if you're snogging the dumpy. Uh-huh. Not the dumper. Fine. Yeah, I think it's fine. Get those tongues wagging. But I think if he like had broken Kaya's heart. Yeah. Or was toxic. Like that's girl code. Or was toxic. like I would never snug somebody who broke your heart oh that's nice what about somebody who broke my heart I fill you with a heartbreaker what do you think I don't know I just feel maybe like I'm just like too jealous a person that I would just feel like there's always going to be like someone who is a lover like not the lover of life but someone who you've loved I don't know if they loved each other will always have something within your heart and is that transferable would you would you like outwardly say it's absolutely okay and then inwardly you'd be absolutely raging i don't think i'd be like i think it you're right i think it probably depends on the circumstances of like how close a friend they are yeah and what their chemistry is like how much did you think it was going to be a really big thing or did you think it was just a bit of fun so i'm sure there's nuances to it context is key totally totally but I don't think I could just like let it go.

39:15It would be all keys if they ended up together and then you were like double, you know, and then they were back in your life and you didn't want them in your life. But maybe if it's a really big issue, maybe that says more about you that maybe there's some unfinished business there. So maybe if it's a like, wow, we weren't meant to be together, then it's fine. I mean, I've done some doshy stuff like that. I remember once I quite seriously went out with my ex's ex. so that's quite bad like like that was the x before me oh wow so it was quite dicey yeah but it also is so weird because then you're like oh kind of fancy the same person yeah going out with me it's also just weird yeah i think that's too close to home it's and it was yeah the life lesson from that is that is too close to home and do not try that i also feel like Kendall seems to have lots of like good healthy female friendships you know she's always with a girl gang yeah so I feel like she wouldn't like maybe they're not close they can't be that close in that like she wouldn't dip in the pool she wouldn't risk it unless she had permission unless she knew that Kai is probably like good luck honey he's a nightmare he feels quite hard going oh god I bet he's really deep do you know what I mean I bet it's I bet it's exhausting he's not on the bar dancing He's not on the bat dancing.

40:37He's like, let's talk about poetry. Let's talk about Keats. And you're like, oh, okay, darling. Hodge, what's sticking out to you in the celebrity lens? Poor Britney, she's tracked herself into rehab. Oh, I know. I feel she's had such a shit time. Honestly, just being famous that young is so hard. It's so hard. She was probably one of the proper first child stars, maybe. Like of our era. Yeah, of our era. That she's just blue. remember that hit me baby one more time she blew up and then suddenly like she was just she was globally famous yeah like how crazy is that also imagine how much worse it would have been for her if social media was there then oh my god it would have been awful I do I always like her shaving her head in the hairdressers and all the paps outside did you ever watch that documentary about her no probably was it good yeah it was really interesting it just felt like was it like positive about her parents because she was in the conservatorship with her parents yeah I remember feeling just so sad for her that she almost didn't really have control of what her life was becoming and then also I feel like when you're that age you're in this period of discovery of yourself as well yeah and everyone is telling you that you're one thing therefore surely you just start like you're like a sponge like you just believe those things at that age and so I just feel like she's missed that whole personal discovery of herself I know and also you learn so much so many life skills during that time right because she was she was famous from like the age of like 18 yeah if not younger than that like 15 and that is when you learn how to do basic things like socialize properly learn how to use your voice and if someone's taking that away from you going to the supermarket yeah and now she's in this situation where she's older and she's come out the conservatorship and now obviously she had the dui incident that's led to her now going checking herself into rehab three weeks before her court date hopefully she's doing it for her and she's gonna get the help that she needs yeah but leave britney alone guys she's a young woman with two young children yeah there's a family at the center there's a family it just it's just awful how the media don't seem to be regulated and also the reason why she's in this situation is because the media wasn't regulated she was hounded she was chased it was when paparazzi were their peak and that's what this is a really good example of saying this is what can happen so be careful how we treat younger stars as they're coming out now they also you see it again with like chapel rome right like yeah the way that she is being attacked left right and center and it turns out you know this whole thing came out that she apparently asked the security guard to go over and tell off this girl who walked past her and it turns out it had nothing to do with her and the and that big footballer whose daughter it was has come out and said it's come out that it wasn't anything to do with her but it's too late yeah she's been eviscerated on the internet for two weeks and i just think we've got to be more careful about how we deal with our younger stars and waiting and having opinions about them we're having no context yeah because all of those big stars i feel like all of them have been through something pretty major and none of them have come out really on top throughout that like you know what miley cyrus has actually do you think i think she is someone who's dealt with it so well and like for instance you know she's come out and said that i don't want to do big concerts anymore and it's partly down to like her mental health and self-protection i'm like good for you babe like she's got strong boundaries she knows herself she knows her voice but that takes a long time to learn right and you're not able to start using your voice or find your boundaries when you're being controlled by so many people and usually it's men as well right yeah and also not know who to trust as well like everyone wants a bit of you and that that fame like the money that they must have access to the lifestyle they have access to but not really any control of it's interesting we're talking about this because i've started reading lena dunham's new memoir fame sick yeah so of course lena dunham is creative girls icon of our times and the book is all about how she dealt with fame and how it found her in her 20s and how difficult it was for her and how she's been eviscerated yeah she's been cancelled more times than you can count and she talks in the book about there's a very particular thing that i think is really worth talking about where she talks about dealing with adam driver on the set of girls and he threw a chair at the wall and he's an actor we were laughing because i didn't know who adam driver is people i feel like you need to go back and watch girls you would love it yeah it's so good but adam driver if you don't know was the male lead who played her boyfriend quite toxic yeah in the show and he threw a chair across the room at her he was so disrespectful and she says in it it didn't ever it didn't ever occur to her to turn around and say i'm your boss she wrote it she directed it she was the exec producer yeah and but she was a boss in her mid 20s yeah and she really struggled to find her voice and to understand that you should not treat me like that yeah it's only now she's revisiting her life that she's like wow and there's such an interesting thing around that about how we don't respect women in the workplace how they are the amount of misogyny that women have to put up with them especially in male-dominated environments entertainment industry is still very male-dominated and the book is amazing for talking about that because we've really got to be teaching our young women to use their voice and know what boundaries are respectable and not respectable.

46:14Oh, I want to read that. It's really good.

46:21Well, one dilemma to the next. It's time to dilemmas, girls. Also, can I just say, last time we were together, the amount of comments on YouTube being like, this is my favorite duo, get them back together. So we listen to the comments. And we're back. We read them and we're back. So please comment if you want to see more of us. And this is the most dilemmas we've ever had. Obviously, we're just giving agony on. We're giving agony on. I'm not sure. Do you want to take our life advice? Honestly, they do. I feel like I've done a lot of mistakes in my life. So I've learned the hard way. Yeah, me too.

46:52So we can share. So straight in. I love this one. I've been invited to a wedding, but I don't want to go. How do I say no? Gosh. Plot spoiler. no can be a full sentence full stop so I honestly just think if you don't want to go or you can't go do you have to overly justify yourself I personally think you do I actually think that's quite rude it depends how close you are right but I don't know I feel like if someone's asked you to a wedding and think of like the planning the time the money that goes into that and the stress of like putting together a guest list if you asked someone they just said no yeah why no I can't make it thanks so much I would be like fuck off then yeah like I think you've got to give an explanation it can be the end of a friendship it can be I think you have to navigate it well yeah I've had to say no to a wedding before because we also got invited to another wedding but Tom was officiating it and it was one of my like close friends from when I was growing up and I obviously had to make the decision to go to the one with Tom because he was officiating we we were very close to that that couple yeah as a couple yeah so I had to make that decision but it was really difficult but it still went on the hen do i think that's the thing you can still turn up to other things around it and like take them out for his dinner yeah yeah i think if if it's like like generally like a logistical problem or like a calendar clash then i think there's other ways that you can get around showing that you care i think if you don't want to go then i would just make up an excuse but you've got to be very careful that excuse because if you're like i'm busy i'm booked yeah and then you're then uploading on instagram like woo with your napkin around in central London at the hut then you're gonna be really up I mean you gotta be watertight if you don't want to go there's a chance they don't really care if you're there or not yeah I think sometimes if you don't really want to go then you probably are probably on the d-list yeah but they are quite expensive they are you know outfit present if you have to do overnight stay if it's not somebody that you love and want to be in their lives forever totally and also like if you're at that time where there's lots of weddings or there's hens in your weekend and you've got your summer and then you've got like your own holiday plans there's a bit of yeah how do i want to spend my time and my money and does this feel like the best to be honest i tried to work out the other day how much i think i spent going on hen do's and also weddings i think it's around 40 000 pounds yeah no way like it's a lot of money it's a lot and that's a house deposit yeah but then but then do you feel like that's totally enriched your life and you've had so much I think it has I think there's elements when it has and there's elements when I'm like I didn't need to go to this oh my god nothing worse than going home you don't want to go you dread it but they are so expensive yeah and everything has to says the person who now wants to go on a hen do to Miami that's what I'm going to do with my hen you're going to where?