2041 – The Importance of Vulnerability and Support in Leadership Networks with EGN’s Dona Amelia

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1:05With us right now, it's Dona Amelia. Dona, you are the co-founder of EGN Malaysia, Indonesia, and Singapore. It's great to have you. Dona, thank you so much for joining us. Thank you for having me. Oh, my goodness. Lovely to see you and feel your energy and all. Lovely. Thank you. Well, thank you. And what's the best web? I see, obviously, there's EGN.com. What is the best website that folks should go to to kind of follow along during our conversation? Sure, it's EGNPeerNetwork.com. That's the best. Ah, good. EGNPeerNetwork.com. Well, tell us a little bit about EGN. So EGN stands for Executive Global Network.

1:48We are the second largest peer network in the world. We do knowledge sharing for senior executives. We provide them with the safe environment where senior executives can come together without any competitor in one group, and they can discuss about their challenges, you know, because we understand sometimes it's lonely at the top. Yet you still need to have friends or a colleague or a peer to talk to. So that's what we do at EGN. We provide them a safe space for them to really discuss about their challenges and also talking about certain trending topics, getting some insight from each other and making each other better.

2:23Yeah. Well, not all peer networks or networking groups or kind of mentoring groups, these are not created equal. Do you mind maybe sharing just a little bit about who generally engages through EGN? How is it typically operated? And again, folks may be already familiar with peer groups and why those are so valuable. But what makes EGN unique? Other than obviously geography seems to be something I'm picking up on. Yes, definitely, definitely. So I'm the co-founder of EGN in Singapore, Indonesia, Malaysia. but we are exist in about 15 countries, but we don't have in US yet. But I believe we do have in US our mother company, which is Vistage.

3:10But in Europe and in Asia, we do have Executive Global Network, which is EGN. Now, to your first questions, like who are the audience of the EGN, Executive Global Network? For my country, the one that I manage, Singapore, Indonesia, Malaysia, we only do for senior executive and also, yeah, basically a business owner and entrepreneur. However, I do understand that in Denmark, where our headquarter, we have like, you know, peer groups for every single profession. In fact, I think we have about 700 or 80 to 700 different professions that, you know, really, you know, cater all the needs. But in Singapore, Indonesia, Malaysia, we have the group for senior executives, such as let's say CEOs or managing director in one group.

3:59Right. But then again, there is no competitor in that group. And then let's say we have also a functional group, like let's say all the finance leaders or CFO will go to the finance leaders group. HR leaders will go to the HR leaders group, sustainability group. Of course, entrepreneur, we have the business owners group and so on and so forth. Yeah. And so to, to our friend that maybe they're in the middle of Kansas. Why in a rural area, you know, there just isn't an EGN. Let's just say that there is not an EGN locally. Why are peer groups so valuable and what sort of real impacts to business and leadership can be had by, and again, it's an investment.

4:49It's a commitment. Like you have to proactively involve yourself in the peer group. And sometimes it might feel like you might feel stressed to do so because you're like, look, I'm going to take off this couple of hours or a few hours or afternoon or something like that. But meanwhile, I've got all these responsibilities I have to take care of. So, you know, businesses, I think for us as leaders have an unquenchable appetite for our time and attention. why might someone um put that off you know the kind of this urgent work to go spend time in connecting with others i think because as mentioned at the beginning i think one sometimes leaders is lonely at the top leaders are lonely at the top they have a lot of responsibilities as you say it right however sometimes they also are able to really express themselves get some inspiration get some other ideas and all because they are really busy with doing what they do and maybe they are biased because they only talk with the people within their organization who might always say yes to them and so on and so forth right and also sometimes as a leader you always need to know and decide everything fast soon right and so on however who taking care of you you also need someone to talk to however you i understand that as a leader you cannot be vulnerable to everybody you need to be able to talk to someone within your frequency i I mean, in a similar level.

6:14So then you can discuss about your challenges or your ideas or whatever it is. So then you have a sparring partner. So then you can get some inspiration. So, yeah, it will be making you better in decision making. And also, of course, you know, you feel like you are not alone in this boat, you know. Because as per my experience with EGN, even leaders from different industries, they will, most of them will handle the similar challenges. doesn't matter what industries right so the best is for you to have another people within the similar responsibility right the similar seniority from different industries so then you can see oh that's how that industry tackle this challenge oh that's how that industry tackle these challenges so i can get some inspiration because if you're only by yourself you might be biased and also you might feel stuck at some point and maybe you can be burned out or stressed and all right So having this peer support is very important, especially not only to getting some knowledge, you know, because it's all about knowledge sharing at EGN, but also for the mental health.

7:19Because a lot of responsibilities you put in the people at the top, right? But they don't even dare to talk to anybody to especially talk about your challenges. So the difference between EGN and any other organization, we're not only talking rah-rah about the success and all. No, actually, what we do is really want leaders to be vulnerable. This is your safe space to really say like, oh, God, I'm screwed up. I really hate my project this month. And then, you know, I need help. And again, if you have, maybe the other person have been there. And then, you know, they can always tell you the do and don'ts.

7:55And also at EGN, we're not allowed selling, which is good. So again, I understand everyone are busy. You know, the last thing they want is to come to some occasion and all. And then all of a sudden, many people try to sell them something and all. And that's not going to happen at our organization because it's all about knowledge sharing. It's all about sharing and helping each other and then making each other better as a leader. Yeah. So you really need to understand as a business leader, because you are busy, you need to choose which are the community that you need to be investing your time. right of course um uh if i thinking about the the amount of time that you can spend with us because uh as a member of egn you will have six time peer group meeting per year and the meeting is every second month for four hours meaning that in a year you will only get six time four hours meeting is meaning it's 24 hours in total right but you will gain a lot of insight from other leaders from different industries or maybe more senior than you or you know who may be already been there who maybe can give you some inspiration, can tell you to do and don't.

8:59Hey, don't go that way. It's going to cost you a bomb, money, la la la la. You know, so that's what's interesting about EGN. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. It's absolutely true. I mean, the emotional, spiritual, you know, mental well-being of the leader really matters. So, you know, to our friend that's listening, find ways that you can engage in self-care, take care of yourself, find peers, take the time. You might think, oh, no, no, I can handle it. I don't need that. But you're human. And it's okay that you're not rush, rush, rush, hustle, hustle, hustle, grind, grind, grind 24-7. When you take the time to invest in yourself along the way, you are just far better prepared to make better decisions.

9:49I mean, I don't know. I mean, I can just tell you, you know, because of this podcast, I'm way more valuable to my organization. And, you know, just because of the conversations I've been able to have and the conversations after and beforehand and the insights and, you know, those that circulate and network with other leaders, I suspect that there are just going to be opportunities that are going to open up to them. that may not be available to those that are just hanging out behind their computer screen, trying to drum up social media followers. Do you want to maybe talk about the power of real connections and relationships?

10:30100 % agree with you indeed. So as mentioned, we do knowledge sharing for senior executives six times a year, every second month for four hours. And it's amazing the energy when you are in the room, let's say 15, 20, 25 leaders from different industries. They're really into the discussion. They really need this kind of organization. However, again, super important, safe space. Because at EGN, everybody needs to sign the non-disclosure agreement. So they feel like, okay, this is my moment to really tell about who I am, how I feel and all. So I tell you a story. Every single group, we have the chairperson.

11:07one of the chairperson will always have a gratitude moment before we even start the meeting so then he will say okay guys what are you grateful for this week and then one person right the managing director for big company and then he said like this i am happy my ceo being kicked out and he laughing everybody laughing you know so my point is you see how trust i mean there is a big trust right about that he might not able to say that in his own organization and they're like you know i thought because he's german back me up but actually you know he stabbed me at the back and i'm so happy he thinks he knows asia more than i am no blah blah blah blah and everybody just laugh and you know that's the human side of it we as a leader you know you cannot always put your facade and look nice and all you know you're human you're based to be yourself to be human and as mentioned another another story of EGN is that you know in every single meeting not only we will share about our success story to inspire others and also asking about if you have any challenges you can always present in front of everyone so then everybody will give you some suggestions and all it's like kind of a group coaching or team coaching kind of thing right now in every single meeting we have what we call advisory board so in the advisory board it will be one person or one member already prepare his or her challenge to be presented in front of everybody in the room and again in one in one group we wanted to have the industry as diverse as possible they will be in the similar level however yeah we don't have any competitor so he will be the only expert in that certain industry for example yeah and then he will talk about his challenge and everybody else in the room their job is to really think about his challenge or her challenge and find the best solution for his uh for him or her based on their vast experience now you can imagine if you're the one who are presenting in the advisory board and people all leaders right top top leaders from different industries really think about your challenge it's amazing uh result amazing like how input insight and advice that you will get because again, the challenge might be more or less the same, but how do you handle it, right?

13:24And they see it from different perspectives, from different lenses, and that's what's beautiful. And most of the time, the person or the leader who presented, right, in front of everybody, they will be amazed, like, oh my god, I didn't think about it. That makes sense. Oh my goodness, okay, thanks for this, and so on, you see? So it's beautiful when you, as a leader, are able to be vulnerable, able to be able to be seen, you know, and asking for help, because that's also another thing that, you know sometimes a leader might not everybody um have that courage to do because especially perhaps in Asia also maybe not in Asia maybe it depends on person to person they might still see being vulnerable or asking for help is uh something you know not really common for them because they wanted to see always being uh you know like strong and not weak and so on yeah Yep.

14:15Yep. Yep. Yeah. It can be, it can be tiring and exhausting, you know, to, to always feel like, you know, it's like if you're around someone that you're never allowed to show your vulnerabilities and weakness, you're never, you're never allowed to make an ask. And oftentimes that's kind of what, you know, if you're the founder and CEO of the company, that might be your situation. Like your people you talk with and communicate with most are clients, your team members, and they look to you. And sometimes we feel like, you know, if we show too much weakness, then that might be demoralizing. So you really, I mean, if you don't have these people that you can go to, you know, someone in your life to just go to and say, you know what, I am just really stressed right now because I have this going on and this going on and this going on.

15:09Listen, I'm sure it's going to be okay, but right now I'm in the middle of it and I just need someone to say, you're going to be okay. Like, I think we all need that. Definitely. Yeah. A hundred percent. Yeah. Let's talk about who can connect with EGN and like what that process is. Okay. So basically, normally we do have our team as well at EGN who really connect and filter all the senior executives who are, you know, like potentially able to join EGN. So that is our first, what is it, steps is for us to reach out to them or they reach out to us. However, this is the most important part and this is most interesting.

15:50Whoever come to EGN and we see all their title, their history of career and so on and so forth. And then let's say it's okay. It's good to join one of the group, right? However, once we do that, we need to circulate that profile to the rest of the member of that particular group. And if, let's say, anybody for any reason, let's say, oh, that's my ex-boss. Oh, that's my ex-wife. Whatever it is. So that person will not be allowed to come to that group. So we need to approach to the other group. So meaning that we're really, really selective in who can join the group. And everybody as a member, they will have the right to say yes or no.

16:34The reason being is because really we wanted to create some environment, safe space, as mentioned, right? For me, my job is to really make members happy. It's my purpose in life. I love to make people happy from whatever I do in life. So they need to feel at home at EGN. You know, when people are at home, you can wear pajamas, you can talk whatever you want and so on and so forth, right? Because again, they're tired. Their whole life, especially during working hours and all, right? It's all their stage. They need to always perform well, well, well, you know? So at EGN, we want them to feel really, really a safe space.

17:10They can really be themselves. And also, of course, it's very important to know who come in to the group, basically. So that's how the process will be. Yeah, wonderful. All right. So your website, EGN Peer Network, we've got a link in the show notes. If you're listening in your podcast app, just kind of click around and you can find that link. When you go to the website, you're going to learn all about EGN. Now, I would say, Dona, you are absolutely a great follow on LinkedIn as well. And it's just really fun to see some of the great groups that you got together. You have a lot of happy people, networking, big smiles on their face because they're among friends.

17:52Listen, we all deserve friends in our life. So Dona, thank you so much for the work that you do. And again, the website, egnpeernetwork.com. Dona, it's been a great conversation. Thank you so much for having me. It's really, really nice to see you. And also thank you for having me in your podcast.

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