2323 - Reclaiming Your Health and Identity in Midlife with The Stallion Project's Christopher Zaino

0:04Well, hey, Thoughtful Leader. Welcome to the Thoughtful Entrepreneur. On this show, I interview purpose-driven founders, experts, and change makers who are making a real impact in the world. Want to be a guest? Simple. Go to upmyinfluence.com and click podcast. I'd love to promote your story to our audience of over 100 ,000 and across over 2 ,300 daily episodes and counting. Want to get booked on other great shows like this? Simple. Go to podverified.com and get your free guest authority score. Thousands of hosts are looking for high quality guests and Podverified connects you the right way. Now let's dive into today's episode.

0:58With us right now is Dr. Chris Zaino. Dr. Zaino, it's wonderful to have you here. You are the founder of The Stallion Project. Your website is drzaino.com. Well, Dr. Chris, it's great to have you. Thanks so much for joining us. Thank you, Josh, and thank you everybody's watching. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Well, listen, before we get into your superpowers and what you do, and it's a subject I'm really excited to talk about as someone who probably fits into your demographic that you work with. But outside of your professional impact in the world, I understand that your life has been exciting as of late.

1:37Yeah. You know, if you told me 10 years ago that, hey, you're going to marry, you're going to get remarried and you're going to have kids, I'd be like, oh, you are crazy. And then like God bring someone wonderful in your life. And I had the whole experience of trying to turn the engines on again. And we have a beautiful little baby girl who's 14 weeks. And Josh, what I noticed is I have an 18 year old. I forgot the whole baby thing. Like you would think after two, a couple of, like, this is all new to me all over again. So that's a lot of fun. And it was a blessing because it kind of, it kind of gave me, it's so much different this time around.

2:12There's a, I think being 49 years old, the perspective, being more present and not being that in my thirties, I was just driving Josh, like just hustling the whole hustle grind thing that we were taught then. And just to be present and to look in her eyes and be in the now I'm enjoying this so much. I, my youngest is 20 years old now. So I remember, you know, we had three kids, right. And I remember, you know, and, and just, you know, when you're in your, you know, I say first half of life, you know, I love this metaphor, you know, kind of this first and second half of life. And a lot of times in our first half of life, you know, we spend all this time for other people and, you know, we're, we're trying to move up and, you know, establish ourselves professionally and what is our identity.

2:57And, and again, a lot of that is just kind of, um, focused on others until we kind of get that figured out. And then in the second half of life, I think I'm stereotyping maybe speaking for myself just a little bit, but, you know, you start to figure out who you are. And now it's like, you know, because of that, you know what I'm getting at? I'd love for you to maybe take this thought and continue on it because this is very much obviously a part of what you do professionally as well. Yeah. You know what? I think you're right. I was 33 years old. I remember that. I don't know what it was for you.

3:29I was 33 years old and I realized my entire life was an accumulation of everybody else's subordinated values put upon me, right? We go to school. We graduate. We go to college. we graduate got it then my mom she's like when am i gonna get a grandkid so i'm like okay i gotta find someone i get married i wanted to have kids before 30 because my dad was 47 when he had me and i don't want to be an old dad but so i was checking off the boxes so i checked off all the boxes and i one day i looked in the mirror i'm like i don't even know who i am and i started this process of what i call courting myself like you said really trying to understand my truth and who i am and what I really like, not what everybody else's expectations over me was.

4:12Well, and Chris, it's interesting. Again, I'll just kind of share because I think I fit in your target demographic here. You know, it's really interesting. And I've talked to several other men at my stage. And I had one interview in particular, Levi King, which was a couple of months ago, And he was very transparent about, you know, I have been, I've had armor on my whole life and I could do about anything. And I've been very successful professionally. But for whatever reason, you know, over the past couple of years, I just, I have like a level of, you know, where I just can't handle it anymore.

4:57And I, you know, and I don't know why, you know, in my words, I would think that why am I feeling so weak right now? Why am I dealing with depression and anxiety? You know, why are these little things bothering me? It doesn't make any sense. Like, if anything, you would think it would be the opposite because of, you know, my wisdom and experience and life. And, you know, he kind of just came to the conclusion it's just the accumulated residue of the world with maybe some of that, you know, maybe that underlying shadow work kind of, you know, internal program thing that was not maybe necessarily top of mind or front, you know, consciously experienced.

5:38But there's just, you know, some sort of this, you know, this belief for me, and I'm sorry to turn this into a super long question here. But, you know, how this was turning out for me is, is I was being so insanely unfair with myself, not consciously, but because something outside of my control would happen. And I would say, well, that's not what a successful, my internal programming would say, well, that's not what a successful man, husband, business owner would have happened in their life. And so maybe it is because we are starting to get more control generally. And so when something deviates from that, it's like, whoa, and we react to that.

6:20And for me, I was really internalizing that in a very, very unfair way to myself. And it was only, you know, by doing a lot of this deep work that I was able to uncover that. It's like, wow, Josh, dude, take it easy on yourself, man. All right. There's a bunch of mess of Josh kind of burying his soul and other people's experiences. And I am certain that you have heard this same story many times. Josh, what you said was, I appreciate you being transparent with that. And I went through that. I call it my decade of darkness. It was in my thirties. And it's like, I had everything. Like I checked off the boxes, Joshua, why am I feeling depressed?

6:56And like, I had no circumstantial evidence to back up what I'm feeling, but I couldn't talk. I couldn't talk to anybody. I didn't have someone like you in my life to talk to and share. And so I was like grieving my potential this whole entire time. And when I started doing my personal work, I was looking back now is filled with a lot of guilt, shame, and unforgiveness because of the expectations we felt we had to live up to. And then watch this, this emotional, spiritual aspect, because everything's connected, started showing itself physically because I didn't know the cause. So I started showing physical signs of this.

7:35And then that's when I got into the deeper physical work of looking at chemistry, hormone chemistry, body chemistry, and started seeing all these things were off. And so that's when I started addressing, well, I know I could address the actual concrete physical chemistry at the same time working on the cause, which is that internal turmoil that you were also experiencing. Chris, do you mind talking about the science of maybe some of the, because I think for me too, I have to acknowledge that, and I think all men likely have to at least take a look at, well, wait a minute, could there be something chemically that's going on that, you know, I should stop being stubborn about this and maybe just take a look at that.

8:23Maybe that could be contributing to my unhappiness or my unease or my worry or this anger or whatever that could be sitting with us. Do you mind giving us just a quick little 101 on why this is so important to be curious about what might be going on for us hormonally, chemically, et cetera? Yeah. For men, we're notoriously about not looking under the hood and checking things out because we don't want to ever brush up against anything that may be considered weakness, but it's not. It's actually being proactive is amazing. So it's not just hormones, if you look at the entire chemistry, chemistry is life, because the way you'll see how it merges is my chemistry and my hormones and my neurotransmitters, it could dictate how I feel.

9:10So you and I could be doing everything right. Like, why do we feel like this? You know, and how we feel affects how we think and how we think affects our actions. So a lot of things I'm doing could be affected of a chemistry that's off. And when your chemistry is off, it affects your mind, your actions, my decisions. And then you start seeing life as something circumstantial, but it's actually internal. And men are not looking towards chemistry. They're looking at the external circumstances. Hey, I'm crushing it at work. My relationship is so, so they're looking on the outside, not really that a simple thing such as just balancing and seeing where my chemistry is at could change their entire life, the way they act, the way they think, the way they experience the planet.

9:51And one thing I realized when we went over that is that the truth doesn't set you free. I found it's the facts because everybody's truth is perceptional. But when I could look at my blood work and see my markers and see facts, I can't argue with facts. But the great thing about facts is I have a foundation now to launch off of and improve. Yeah. Well, do you mind sharing just a little bit about, and by the way, I didn't mention you are a former Mr. America and Mr. Universe. Do you mind sharing just a little bit about that experience and how that impacted where you are today and your work today?

10:32Yeah. So I had one Mr. America, Mr. Universe. I was a trainer for, remember Xena Warrior Princess, that show? Yeah. So yeah, I was 21 years old in college, like training all these actors who go to New Zealand and Orlando is great. That's going to be my life. And then I, I, I got struck with an incurable disease called ulcerative colitis. And they were about, they were a week away from removing my colon. That's a long story short. And that's when I went through this whole cosmic alarm clock of life where like I was face to face with my mortality. I didn't know what was going on. And that's what took me instead of going the medical road of getting my colon removed to start seeking natural ways that the body heals.

11:12So that that forced me to have to learn how the body was created to heal function operate. And that took me all through the wellness journey to get where I am today. So 20 years of helping people and because it started from my own kind of ashes to beauty story. And yeah, it was very tough because just think my identity and my significance was upon how I looked. So imagine having a disease that stripped you because you bled 13 times a day that stripped you of everything that your identity was, so was a tremendous identity crisis around 24, 25. What is your work today? How do you work with leaders?

11:50I'm particularly interested for our corporate leaders who are listening or maybe SMB founder and they may be really interested or tuning into the message that you're sharing. What do you do to bring this message into the workplace? Well, I kind of became that guy working with entrepreneurs, CEOs, sheiks, celebrities and stuff, because they would come to me to try to do something. It wasn't the one-liner or the next strategy at work they needed to advance their career. I found out their bodies were a wreck. They were so wonderful in one area of life, but such a polar opposite disaster was so unbalanced.

12:31So I kind of became like the Mr. Miyagi. Remember Karate Kid? Like, you know, wax the car. Why am I doing this? Paint the fence. Why am I doing this? Walk on the treadmill. Eat right. What's this have to do with my success? Everything. Everything. So we started working, getting the body right, getting them right. So I have body. Get your body right. Being, your spiritual walk, your purpose. Sometimes we work so hard, we lose focus of our lighthouse. Balance. That's the people in our life. Our relationships, our kids, our loved ones. Then we talk about business. So I found out that body, being, and balance was so far off.

13:06those were the key factors to really raise that business to where it needed to be. So we started going through the body route first to get them where they needed to be. And the results were easy, efficient, and fantastic. Yeah. Well, what are a couple of things that maybe you would recommend? Listen, all men, again, we'll talk because I know you predominantly work with men in their 40s on up. If there were just like two or three action items that we could leave them with, you know maybe it's learn about this just I want to give an assignment maybe two things that we could do today that could really improve our outlook for you know what we want out of ourselves and in our world yeah it's let's start with just the one assignment and that is stop lying stop lying don't say things are great and so the way I do this is it's skin stand naked in front of the mirror and look and scan your body, your hair.

14:02How's your, what do you, what's the facts about your hair? How about your eyes? Well, like I'm nearsighted. Okay. How about your heart? Well, I'm on cholesterol drugs. Like scan your body and what you don't like, be honest about, don't hide. And then the facts set you free. We have to get testing. So if you haven't had a colonoscopy, get a damn colonoscopy. If your eyes are up, like when you scan your body and realize like my skin has these weird knots or colors on them. Maybe I need to get my skin checked out for, but we don't want to know there's weakness. So it's like scan the body, get coaches or help or doctors, like get the data.

14:37So that's easier for a businessman or person because they're used to KPIs and data. We need the data. So the thing is we have no, where's the data on your body? Where's the data? What's the truth about your body? What's the data about your biochemistry? And at least that's a foundation and face it and look at it. Do you know, Josh, heart disease takes 30 or 40 years to kill you. Cancer. When my dad died of cancer of a 10 pound tumor, the doctor said he had it for over 30 years. Before I was born, my dad had cancer. So it's like the top killers of men take forever to kill you. And they're so easily caught if we just take the time to focus on what's going on on the inside.

15:16Yeah. Listen, on the colon screening too, I'll just put a plug in for this too. It ain't like the, you know, generally there are the easy screenings you can do. It's not the invasive finger dot, dot, dot, dot, dot, right? You can just go in. It's super, super easy. It is just mandatory. The men in your life, you know, please just have them talk to their doctor. It is so easy. Bam, bam, bam, get it done. And then you're good, right? So many things like that. And then obviously, you know, working on ourselves emotionally and, you know, from personal development perspective as well, what's usually like your prescription there, right?

15:56Because obviously physically it's really important to be active. And I would agree that, you know, working on ourselves emotionally and mentally too, like I love that you said that it is okay to not, I forget what the words you use, but like, it's okay not to be fine. And it's okay to let other people know, you know, I don't know, man, I'm feeling a little bit down, but I want to work on that. Like, you know, just like, you know, show that you're proactive. I'll just tell you, Dr. Chris, my wife and I actually just talked about that. And she was just saying, you know what, that is so attractive in a man, a proactive man that is not stubborn, but is always looking for things to work on and improve such an attractive quality.

16:42I understand. And you know, not only is it a beautiful thing, it's the most unselfish thing you could do. And it's the most loving thing you could do. You know, it's an act of love. So even though I go back to the physical, for instance, something I could do is like this morning, I love going for my cardio and doing my walk and I listened to a podcast. So I'm walking on my, my brain's being turned on. I'm getting healthier. Movement is the greatest antidepressant. So that's my emotional work. Plus when I'm, when I'm moving, getting input of a positive podcast like this or something else, I'm also training and teaching myself.

17:14So this doesn't take more time. You can multitask some beautiful things. And I love that part. I love my morning. It sets the day. It fills my well. A lot of times men, when we get in scarcity, poverty, worry, anxiety, and panic, hunger, angry, lost, or depressed because our well goes dry. So I ask a man, well, what are you doing to fill the well in the morning? What are you doing to fill it up? Because then the rest of the day, people are taking withdrawals out of that well. So once you could find, what is that thing you could do to fill that well for the rest of the day? And you do that day after the day.

17:46I mean, your days just get brighter and brighter and it's an act of love and service to you. It's like kind of like, you know, Jim Rohn used to say, take care of you for me and I'll take care of me for you. And I love that. I love that. I love that. Dr. Chris, your website is drzaino.com. And I know you've got resources, you've got courses, you know, obviously to our friends listening, you know, as a, as a corporate speaker, I know you do great work there. Do you mind just kind of sharing next steps for our friend that's been listening to our conversation, please? Yeah, you can visit the website, drzender.com and reach me out there or even Instagram, you know, you just go then, you know, reach out there, subscribe and look and every one of the bits of my content, because I know timers are greatest asset.

18:31and the fact that you're even taking the time now. We want to make sure that every single piece of information we give is making you 1 % better, or at least it is enlightening your day to be better in some way, shape, or form. And I answer all my comments. I always take personal responsibility of the communication. And all of that is available through your websites, drzano.com. You had a couple of books as well. Do you mind mentioning those? Yeah, I wrote a book called Winning My Race. It was, it actually went into over a community of over 400 ,000 churches. You know, it's, it's amazing. Like one of the, one of my superpowers was, uh, I would tell my story and I know that no one could BS, no one could call BS on my story.

19:17So I remember like, I was such a nervous person, an introvert, but I realized like if I could share my story, it helped so many people. Plus sharing my story allowed me to heal. That's another part of healing is sharing. Right. And then I had so much success on that. I went all in on speaking and being transparent and using my ups and downs to help people give them the light to improve themselves. So because of that, that just became something I went full in on. One final message. I'm hoping maybe you could just kind of close out here on maybe a simple act that we can do. and again, I want to speak to the men in particular, and obviously the women who appreciate the men in their lives.

20:00But what's something that we could do to support one another? You know what? When you're having a rough time of your life, the best thing you could do is go on your contacts on your phone and you help them, the whole Zig Ziglar thing. It could be like, hey Josh you're on my mind I just want to see what's going on is there any way I could help help serve you when I'm in a bad place when I'm in a bad place and I feel like I'm not winning but then I want to help Josh win I want to help so I go go through all my contacts guess what you'll have 40 replies back you'll be setting up calls with people and it gets you out of that funk and then instead if if I'm not winning the way I should be at least I could help Josh and everybody else win in some way shape or form and that to me was one exercise that in the darkest times of my life has totally got me out of it.

20:51And at the same time, I was able to help so many other people as well. Yeah, focusing on others. Love it. Dr. Chris Zaino, again, your website, drzaino.com. And again, the Stallion Protocol is your, you have a course, you know, obviously a lot of great content as well that you share on social media. You're a great social media follow. I'm gonna follow you and keep you in my life, Dr. Chris. Thank you so much for joining us. Thank you, Josh. And thanks very much for watching. Have a good day.

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