2343 - A Unique Celebration for Dads to Connect, Share, and Recharge with Fathers Eve's John Francis

0:04Well, hey, Thoughtful Leader. Welcome to the Thoughtful Entrepreneur. On this show, I interview purpose-driven founders, experts, and change makers who are making a real impact in the world. Want to be a guest? Simple. Go to upmyinfluence.com and click podcast. I'd love to promote your story to our audience of over 100 ,000 and across over 2 ,300 daily episodes and counting. Want to get booked on other great shows like this? Simple. Go to podverified.com and get your free guest authority score. Thousands of hosts are looking for high quality guests and Podverified connects you the right way. Now let's dive into today's episode.

0:58Well, I'm excited for this one with us right now. I've got John Francis. John, you are the founding father of Father's Eve. We're going to talk about that. You're found on the web at fatherseve.com. Just for fun, if you search back, I think it was several years ago, John, we had a great conversation about your work as Johnny Franchise, which for kicks, someone wants background, they can see your other work. We've got that linked in the show notes for this episode as well. But John, it's so great to have you. Thank you, Josh. I'm glad to be here. I'm really excited to share my story and share it with your audience.

1:41Well, what you're doing, I'm such a huge fan of, and we're going to talk about that. Before we do, I always love to, I didn't tell you about this, but I always love to ask our guests what they're doing for fun or enjoyment outside of work. and I understand you had a you had kind of an adventuresome weekend well yeah you know it's I live in Minnesota and this time of year in the fall is hunting season and we actually went pheasant hunting this past weekend with I go with my I have two brothers-in-law and then a small group of friends and we actually went to South Dakota which you can drive over there from here and I got to tell you Josh the pheasant hunting in South Dakota I think it's the best in the world I mean there's people there from all over the place who come in just to hunt those birds.

2:30And, you know, you do a lot of walking, you're walking these fields, there's dogs that are working and flushing the birds and retrieving the birds. And it's just, it's a really great time. And the weather cooperated, we had decent weather, good clear skies, and it's just beautiful scenery out there. And there's, I don't know, there's just nothing like it. I think it's one of those, it's a combination of the people, the place, and the activity. And you put it all together, and we just had a fantastic weekend. So it was a lot of fun. And we got our birds. You know, we always come back with the birds.

3:05And like I shared, you can, we cook some pheasants. You know, we'll eat them, and we'll enjoy that. But we'll also trade them and share them with other people who want to get them but really can't find them. And so it becomes kind of an exchange or a barter. And it's really just kind of fun, you know? Yeah. Yeah. Well, and I think that this is a great kind of opener or segue into Father's Eve. So give us an overview of the great work that you're doing and the mission and purpose behind this. Well, yeah. Thank you. Father's Eve actually started as an accident in my garage. Jeez, it's been a while.

3:46It was 2012 was the accident, we call it. And the idea is to get guys together. And we say we connect, share, and celebrate fatherhood. So Father's Eve is just a function of the calendar. It's the night before Father's Day, of course. Everybody knows Father's Day is the third Sunday in June. And I love Father's Day with my wife and my kids. And I lost my dad, sadly. But we celebrate the fatherhood in our family on Father's Day. Father's Eve is the night before it's just for the dads. So think of it as a dad's night out. It's a chance for guys to get together and have some fun and share some stories and really just kind of hang out.

4:31There's not much of a program and we're not selling anything. We're not buying anybody. We're not solving anyone's problems. We're really just get together and enjoy each other's company. And the common denominator is we're all dads or we all have dads. And we want to celebrate that fatherhood. And what I've learned, Josh, is if I can bring guys together for good, we can do some good together. Sometimes we volunteer. We've turned ours into a fundraiser for charity groups. But what I find is a lot of guys take for granted being a dad and being a father and the impact that they have on their family and their community and their, you know, in their environment.

5:15And so if I can help guys just be a little more intentional about being a better father or a better husband or whatever, it really makes a lot of impact and has tremendous potential, I think, to help people at a lot of levels. So over the years, we've tried a lot of things and we've had a lot of fun with it. I like to say it's fun, it's free, it's everywhere, right? We're not, it's not a club, it's not a membership, it's not some kind of secret. We do it in a variety of locations and bars and restaurants and churches and schools and I still do it in my garage here in Minnesota and guys host, we call it an event, Father's Eve all over the country and then we have some fun with a toast.

6:03that we do a countdown toast. So everybody knows New Year's Eve, you got to wait till midnight, right? And you count it down and the clock strikes 12, it's 10, nine, eight, you know, all the way down. We back that up to eight o 'clock because I want to go home by 1030, right? I don't want to see midnight. So we do a countdown toast in each of the four US time zones at eight o 'clock. And we stream that now on Zoom. and we have some fun with that. We're telling some dad jokes and we get guys zooming in from all over the country, but that time zone kind of wave crosses the country and you see the different events and the different guys zooming in and different time zones.

6:48Some guys are with us just for five minutes just to do the toast in their time zone. Other guys are hanging out with us all night because they've got an event or a group or a party going on and we let it run in the background. And it's just fascinating to see guys connect. We find that there's an isolation issue, right? A lot of guys kind of don't know how to make friends or they lose touch with their friends. They get real focused on their work or something else and they get distracted from their own personal time. So we think Father's Eve can alleviate some of that and create that connection point.

7:24I like to say, bring your buddies or come make some new ones, you know, and come out to Father's Eve. Yeah. Well, John, could you share just a little bit about why I have my experiences, why this is so valuable right now? And I'll just preface this with just a little bit of my experience. It is really hard to get together with guy friends. I don't know why I find that in my work of just like, you know, asking a friend if they want to go play pool, do you want to go to me? It's I don't know. I it takes very concerted effort. And I don't know why that's the case. It doesn't seem like my wife and her friends have quite the challenge that I do.

8:10Yeah, sadly, I think you're right. I think a lot of guys, you know, it's got to be something. It's got to be a game or a concert or some kind of an activity, you know, to bring them out. You know, they don't want to just go hang out for no reason. Right. That feels like maybe you guys just want to be purposeful or somehow productive. We got to be doing something if we get together. Well, I don't I don't think like that. I guess I'm interested to just see my friends or connect with guys kind of with for for with no agenda. And that's what Father's Eve really is. there's really no agenda. There's, there's nothing, there's no program.

8:47There's no speech. There's no, uh, there's nothing formal about it. We just get together and have a good time. And if guys want to tell some stories and learn from each other, that's great. Um, but yeah, I think that the challenge, I think COVID kind of wrecked it for a lot of people, you know, when everyone got locked out and they had to stay home and stay away from each other. And, and that, that created some, I guess we lost some habits or skills maybe in how to connect in real life. Although I think a lot of that is old news now. I think people are able to get out and go around and have some fun if they want.

9:24So I think what happens to guys is, like I said, they get busy with work or they get busy with other things they're involved with. And I'm not much of a golfer, but I've got a lot of friends that golf a lot. And so they go golfing and it's like, well, you know, that's not really something I want to do. The time and the money commitment is, is just, um, you know, I'd rather go do something else, but, uh, maybe father's Eve becomes that common denominator because it's, it's easy and it's free and you just, it's in real life. If you want to go to a place or host an event for yourself or your own guys, uh, or if you want to just join us online, you know, there's multiple ways to participate.

10:06So I think by lowering the expectations and really just making it totally accessible to anybody, and people say, well, can my kids come? Can my wife come? I'm like, sure, of course. We're totally inclusive. We'll welcome everyone, but we really invite the guys, the dads. So we're open. And I'm a more the merrier, kind of an abundance attitude. You know, I think we can all learn from each other and have some fun together. John, would you mind talking about the impact that you've already had? I mean, you've gotten national press coverage, like this is, this is quite a movement. The website is fathers eve.com.

10:51You know, obviously to a lot of folks that are listening to this, You know, we might be founders, consultants, coaches working our tails off day to day. John, we need we need that downtime. And we must, in my opinion, prioritize that. I think, you know, when you're earlier, you might feel like you can get away with less of that. But after a while, you know, you kind of especially I think if you get into this second stage of life, you know, kids are getting older and stuff. You recognize, no, no, no, no. if I stop investing into my own personal bank, I'm not as much fun to be around. I'm less productive at work.

11:31This very much just from a cost benefit analysis has become a huge priority for me. But I'm sorry, getting back to the original point, talk about the impact that you've had so far. Yeah, well, we've made an impact, definitely. I think, well, we've raised some money over the years for charity groups. We did in Minneapolis and my events in the past few years, we've raised money for charities. I think we're up to almost$40 ,000 that we've raised for various charities. We've done some other fundraisers around the country. There's groups, for example, my group in Cincinnati does a diaper drive at their event.

12:10So bring diapers and they They give the diapers to a diaper bank for families that can't afford it or need that sort of thing. It's like a food bank, but for kids, for little kids, for supplies and equipment for little kids. When your kids get potty trained, God bless them, and you've got a case of diapers that you didn't use, you can't take them back because you've opened it, but obviously we don't want to throw them away. So we'll put them into circulation through a diaper drive. That's just one example. And I think the other thing that I've heard from guys over the years that come after Father's Eve, you know, we do a survey or we get some social media exposure.

12:51And we say, hey, how did you like it? What did you do? What was the best? And I've had guys respond to me and say, you know, I didn't really know what to expect. Me and my buddy showed up and there were 15 other guys there hanging out. And so guys come into Father's Eve as strangers. They may not know each other, but they're coming to the same place with really the same kind of no agenda, just curious or interested or, you know, really just kind of do whatever you want. There's nothing to it. But by the end of the night, they're all friends. They've all connected. And they come back the next year.

13:27It's like, hey, I'm going to do it again. We'll see you again. And so we're building some relationships, some friendships, some ideas. Because, you know, like when I was earlier, when my kids were younger, you know, I had guys who would show up and I'd say, hey, tell me about your family, you know, tell me about your kids. Oh, I've got kids, little kids or whatever. And I would say, let me tell you how I taught my kid how to ride a bicycle, right? Here's what worked. Here's what I would do different next time. You know, here's what didn't work. Or like my daughters are, my oldest is out of college now.

14:02But a few years ago, I was looking for dads whose kids went to college and I'd say, hey, what did you what what happened that you didn't expect? You know, I mean, I can read, I can listen, but I'd love to talk to someone whose kid went to college and say, you know, what was not obvious? What were you surprised by when they got to college or in their college experience? What can I be prepared for? So we get the old guys teaching the young guys and then really the young guys teaching the old guys. You know, when Snapchat was a new thing, it's like, what is this? My kids on this and what am I supposed to do with it?

14:37So the guys are sharing ideas and strategies, I guess, where, again, being a better husband, being a better father, trying to understand, you know, what's important, what's not important. And then telling stories. You know, I say, tell your dad's story about your dad. You know, about my, you know, I would talk about my dad and my experience as the son in the family, or I'll tell you the story about me and my family, my kids and being the dad to my children. And, you know, everybody has their ups and downs. I mean, I don't know anybody who's had just a straight line of experience. There's all kinds of chaos and real life that comes in.

15:17And we get guys in what we call a judgment-free environment. Like nobody's there to keep score or keep track. We're just there to talk about it as much as you want to, or not at all. If you don't want to nobody really cares and we're just there to have a good time you know we we have some games that we do a bags tournament with the cornhole you know we have some fun with that and you'd be some of the guys are very competitive and we'll set up a tournament they'll go crazy for a little three inch trophy you know just to say that they won you know and and so we have some fun creating those kind of environments but I think the impact really is on the guys who connect while they're there and they leave knowing they've got some support, some new guys or some new friends, people they can talk to or connect with.

16:08I had guys at one of my events who got hired by somebody else at the event, right? He was looking for a job. I said, well, talk to that guy. He owns a business or two. So we've had some of the kind of random networking. I mean, that's not really the intention, but those things happen. When you put the right people in the right environment with kind of clear expectations of not much, good things happen because they're creative and they're interesting and they're a lot of fun. And so we have a lot of fun. The whole thing is to have a good time. That's what we're all about. The website is fatherseve.com.

16:46There are events throughout the country. I saw that there are events here in Orlando where I live. So I am really looking forward to joining my next local event. But let's give some calls to action. Where do people go? Obviously, everything is at fatherseve.com. And how do fathers get involved? Yeah, well, I mean, they would go to the website. I guess we're on all the social medias. You know, we're not hard to find. You can either participate in someone else if they're hosting an event. that's easy just show up you sign up and show up now if guys host an event at their house we call those private events because some guys may not want perfect strangers at their house so we can control that uh and give them the ability to they can ask hey i'm in town i want to i want to come can i come to your and they may want to talk to that guy or figure out who they are before so we don't advertise if it's private event we kind of keep it private if it's a public event like most of them are at, I think the one in Orlando was at a Topgolf, something like that.

17:56Someone organized a get together there. Usually it's pay your own way. Everybody just kind of pays for whatever they eat or drink or whatever there might be. But we don't sell tickets or anything unless it's a fundraiser. We've done that where it's a charity thing and we say 110 % goes to charity. We make sure every dollar goes to the worthy charity. So you can host an event, you can participate at an event, or you can join us online. We do a live stream and we have some fun with that. We're also welcoming sponsors and we're interested in licensing arrangements or affiliate arrangements if we think it's appropriate.

18:38We've got some brands that we collaborate with and work with. One of our longtime sponsors is a brand called Sport Clips, which is, you know, hair shops or hair salons for men and boys. and they're all over the country, and we've had some fun with the people at Sport Clips giving us support and some discounts and stuff if you guys need a haircut, you know, whatever. So it's a lot of ways to get involved, and really it's a matter of what are you interested in. You know, if you're, we call the alpha dads, the guys that have a group or lead a club already. We had a club out in Vancouver, Canada that was a bicycle club of guys, and there were about 20 or 30 guys, and they said, this is perfect for us.

19:21We're going to bike ride all day on Saturday. And then we meet at a beer brewery for Father's Eve as a group. And they just stay along and they invite other guys who maybe don't want to ride the bikes all day, but come together at night. So it's if you've got an existing group, if you've got just a family and friends event in your backyard. I mean, it could be, it's a multidimensional opportunity is what I would call it. It could be anything you want. or we've had guys that zoom in because they're stuck at home and they got something they can't get away but they want to be part of it so they'll zoom in and and log into their local event but at their time zone they might see 15 or 20 other cities then guys coming in from all over the place and then we do the countdown toast at the same time and just to make it fun that's that's the the memorable moment is the countdown toast so if you do nothing else join us online for the Countdown Toast.

20:17And if you're in a market where we've got an event, go to that one or have another one. If you want to have, if they're on the other side of town and you want to do one on your side of town, or if you want a private event just in your backyard or your garage or whatever, we're open to all of that. It's easy to do. You click through on the website. It's going to send me a notice. I'm going to schedule a phone call because I want to know who you are, where you are, and what you have in mind. There's no fee, there's no credit card, there's nothing like that. It's just a simple agreement. And then we set it up online, we set it up on the socials and we promote the heck out of it.

20:56And the idea is that we get enough guys doing this time over time and it gets a little snowball effect. We can get some sponsors and some visibility to help make it even bigger and even more fun. So that's kind of the ambition is to just continue to grow it year over year over year. There are a lot of business leaders listen to this podcast. And I hope that one of them is connected to sponsors, to all those listening, help find the dads in your life. If you are a dad, come and join. Again, the website, fatherseve.com. All the socials are linked, the calendars there and every other opportunity.

21:37John Francis, again, founding father, thank you so much. for all of the work you're doing. Thank you for the impact that you are creating in the world. It's a tough time for men. And social media, by and large, may or may not be helping. But organizations and communities like Father's Eve can absolutely help us know that we are not alone in the things that maybe we stress and worry about. So thank you again for your great effort, John. And thank you so much for joining us. Well, thank you, Josh. I really appreciate the opportunity and welcome the connection and sharing this with your audience.

22:21It's a great opportunity. Thank you.

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