In short
Podcast Summary: The Toast - Episode: All Things Trout with Olivia Oshry
Episode Date: June 13, 2025 Hosts: Jackie Oshry and Olivia Oshry
Episode Description In this episode, Jackie and her sister Olivia (nicknamed "Trout") discuss a range of pop culture topics, including Taylor Swift and Travis Kelce's date night at the Stanley Cup Final, Sabrina Carpenter's new album backlash, casting rumors for 'The Traitors' Season 4, changes coming to the GRAMMYs, and a Love Island recap. The episode concludes with a "Dear Toasters" advice segment.
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Key Topics Discussed
- Taylor Swift and Travis Kelce at the Stanley Cup Final
- Mention of their date night during Game 4 of the Stanley Cup.
- Discussion about the vibes in Florida, where both hosts reside.
- Sabrina Carpenter's New Album Backlash
- Carpenter's single "Man's Best Friend" and its album cover faced criticism for being perceived as catering to the male gaze.
- Jackie and Olivia express their opinions on the album cover and its implications for young audiences.
- They debate the responsibility of artists to their audience, particularly young girls.
- Rumored Cast for 'The Traitors' Season 4
- Discussion of who may be joining the reality show, including Donna Kelsey and other notable figures.
- Commentary on Mama Kelsey’s rising profile in the media landscape.
- GRAMMYs 2026 Changes
- Information about new categories and representation changes aimed at the country music genre.
- Critical stance on the introduction of a category for best album cover.
- Love Island USA Recap
- Olivia shares her thoughts on the recent developments in the show, including character dynamics and alliances.
- Discussion about the relationships within the island and predictions for future episodes.
- Dear Toasters Advice Segment
- A series of letters from listeners seeking guidance on personal issues.
- Key Letters:
- A mother unsure if she should correct her son calling her "mama" instead of "mom."
- A listener grappling with knowledge of her brother-in-law's infidelity and how to navigate family dynamics.
- A married woman torn about changing her last name, citing family tensions and personal identity.
Key Takeaways
- On Relationships: The hosts emphasize the importance of honesty and communication within relationships, especially when dealing with sensitive family matters.
- On Pop Culture Responsibility: They argue for artists to consider the impact of their work on younger audiences.
- On Family Dynamics: The complexity of family relationships can lead to difficult decisions about loyalty and accountability.
- On Personal Identity: Discussing last names reflects broader themes of identity, heritage, and the evolution of societal norms regarding marriage.
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Conclusion The episode blends light-hearted banter with deeper discussions about culture and personal identity, showcasing the unique dynamic between Jackie and Olivia Oshry. The advice segment emphasizes the hosts' engaging approach to addressing listeners' dilemmas while fostering a community of support and understanding.
Written by AI. May contain mistakes. Listen to the episode to check what was said.
Transcript
Automatic transcript. May contain errors.0:20I sound amazing. welcome back to the toast happy friday happy trout day i am joined today by my big sister olivia aka trout hey yo what's up i'm so happy to be here i'm so happy that you're here it's very exciting we're both in studio together obviously like it's extremely legit you know like i feel like a real podcaster yeah you are well you know i'm pretty sure i was like the most requested. Oh, no, I'm totally joking. Like five people really wanted me. And here I'm making it happen for the five of you guys. No, everybody really wants trout. It wouldn't be an episode of co-host friends and family without a piece of trout.
1:06Well, you know what? I think the funny thing is, is that you guys are growing so fast that sometimes a lot of people don't even know that I exist. They're like, Olivia, who's that sister? We're growing so fast. No, I know. I always see comments. Sometimes they're like, there's another sister. I'm like, hello. Yes, it's me I'm here you know so yes if you're new here because we're growing so fast um Claudia and I are sisters and we have two other sisters so everyone got to hear Margo on the ones and twos on Monday snitch on the toast she's our littlest sister and this is our biggest sister Olivia I actually you know that I'm not a toaster per se because I like I don't have the time to listen every day and I also feel like because I talk to you all day every day I know how you feel about a lot of things so I don't always feel like I have to listen she gives us and she takes it but I do A lot of times people will like message me something.
1:52And then I realized that like, I think you're talking about me a lot on the toast, you know? So then I'm like confused that like some of the new fans don't know who I am. Yeah. But, you know, we never give context or we rarely do. So when we're just like Trout did this, Trout did that, like, I think they just figure at some point they'll catch up. But we don't give an explainer every time. But yes. Olivia is the oldest of the sisters. You should explain why you call me Trout too, because that might be confusing for people. It's just a childhood nickname that I called you a lot when we were growing up.
2:18and then it laid dormant for 10 years. And then when we moved down to Florida together and we were spending a lot of time together, like I just, I guess I felt like my childhood self again and I started calling you Trout again. Yeah. And now your name is Trout. Yeah, 100%. Trout Ashtray Shapiro. Here she is. Tell us a little bit about yourself because apparently we're growing so fast and people might not know you. Oh my God. Well, I'm the oldest of my sisters. I'm so proud of them. I think they're beautiful, stunning, smart and all the things. I live here in Florida too. I call myself sort of like corporate trad vibes, you know, because you got me into the sourdough.
2:50I have a garden. You know, I do a lot of cooking and people are always like, did you always cook so much? And I think like when you have a family to feed and a lot of times feeding your family, too, it's like, yeah, you've got to make dinner and you've got to figure it out. And you have to have like recipes and like things on repeat. So, yes, I share a lot about like food, things that I love to eat, brands that I love. I have been in marketing for 15 years. So like I'm a very brand centric person. I love brand. I love marketing. I love great ads. and I love the toast and I love my sisters. And what else do people want to know about me?
3:20No, that's great. Thank you so much. I feel like sometimes it's hard, actually. Like I think about that a lot. I always think about it with my Instagram bio. I'm like, who am I and what do I do? And it's very hard for me to like wrap my head around, you know, like I'm not going to be like mom, wife, sister, you know, but I do kind of have a little bit. No, I know. So I'm like, you know, I'm like, what do I say about myself? I'm the founder and CEO of Turdilu Global. No, see, and that's amazing, you know. I sometimes recently, I think it's been like that for over a year. And sometimes I'm like, should I change it?
3:53No, I always think about that. To literally anything else. No, I look at my Instagram all the time. The picture that I have there is from like two and a half years ago. I'm like, but like what would I change it to? Because I'm not somebody like when you come to my Instagram, like you will not see me. Like it will not be photos of me in different outfits in different settings. It will be like photos of the things I ate, made, grew. and I'm not going to put like a picture of a big tomato as my, you know, as my profile picture. Your prize winning tomato. Yeah. And I don't like love to take pictures either.
4:23Like I think if you know me, you know that about me. So I struggle. I struggle. No. Okay. Well, you're doing a great job. We're excited that you're here. We have some really great stories today. And I decided after we skipped Dear Toasters with Jared Freed, I looked at my roster of co-hosts and I thought who would be great to do Dear Toasters with. And I do think it's America's big sister Trouteskin. Oh my God. Okay. So we're going to do dear toasters today. I know that if I didn't do dear toasters this week and like we did Queenie and Weenie, like they would riot in the streets. But dear toasters, like sometimes I see like insane situations.
4:54Like I don't even know if I'm going to help advise. No, I chose ones that I think you would give good advice for. Like they're very tailored to the guests. Like I had ones picked out for Jared Freed. Those are not the ones that we're doing today. Yeah. I do want to talk about your Jared Freed episode, but I have a sneaking suspicion that one of the stories also ties into it as well because I have a point to make on that. So we'll see. So if we don't have one of the stories about it, then I'm going to bring it back up again. What would tie into Jared Freed in the stories? Should I just say it now?
5:16Yeah. Well, I'm like Travis and Taylor, like living down here. Is it one of the stories? Yeah, that's our first story. That they're like Florida stars. Move to Florida. No, I knew it was going to be because it's kind of the theme of the week with Jared talking about like having moved down here. Yeah. Just being down here is so fucking pargy, you know? Everybody wants to be here, guys. I think they're experiencing the pargy vibes. The Stanley Cup, I did go to a finals game last year. You did. You did. And it was really an amazing time. So I'm glad that Taylor and Travis had that experience for themselves.
5:45And we will talk about it in the stories. So thank you for caveating that. Okay. So before we get into it, I actually came here with an agenda. You said that. What is it? And I've been like rehearsing this at night. And I feel really strongly about like what I want to say. Oh, my God. Okay. Let's get the solo cam on her. Oh, God. Scary. Okay. So as you can see, I'm wearing my Toast cardigan. I wear this cardigan like once a week. I also post like once a week about the fact that like you guys fucking need to bring this back. This is like the best piece of merch you've ever made. And like I feel like you're ignoring me.
6:15And every time I post it, people are like, oh, my God, yeah, we need the cardigan. And I've been like kind of in my cardigan era. Like I found some great cardigans on Amazon that I love, but like nothing compares to this. And so as I was thinking through like how can I incentivize them to really want to bring this back for me and for everybody else that wants it. Like I have a collab idea and I'm just putting it out there like I'm shooting my shot because I'm here. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. I'm listening. No, I seriously thought you were about to like talk about Israel and Iran. Like I literally did not know what you were about to say.
6:45So I'm feeling more calm. No. Um, you know how like vineyard vines has like a whale or like polo has like the horse. Like I think we should put like a trout. We should do like a trout X toast collab on the cardigan, different colors. Like we can make it like seasonal. I just feel like this, this is me. Like I love this article of clothing more than anything else I own. Okay. And the fact that I only have one and I have to wash it every so often and it's just going to like lose its luster. Like we really need to bring it back. Okay. Well, first of all, I agree with you. I love that cardigan and I wear it all the time.
7:19I will talk to the team, but we do need to run the numbers and see how many we sold. Like there's a reason we didn't bring it back again and again and again. It wasn't our most popular item. I feel like maybe you didn't have like the right model ambassador advocate advocating for it. Because again, like I don't have like a super skinny body type, you know, and like this is the best article. No, but it's really for everyone. I love that cardigan and I would love to make other colors. I think when we drop the cardigan, we were like this. Like because all I wear is cardigans. Yeah. I have cardigans in every single color.
7:48So when we did one, I was like, this is going to crush. Like we're going to be making pink ones. And like it was just like I think they didn't know. They didn't know. They didn't know. It was ahead of its time, you're saying. Thousand percent. And by the way, it's totally like. Jackson Claude. It's a cardigan like sort of summer. I feel like cardigans are very in. And I feel like this could be this could be like hot, you know? Yeah. I mean, that was literally me one year ago. And I agree with you. So I you're preaching. Do you like my idea of like the little trout? Like a little fish there? We'll have to talk.
8:22We'll have to, you know, mock it up with the team. But did you see actually if you're looking for some trout wear, did you see Paige Lorenz's brand Dairy Boy has like a fish sweater? that's like no selling yeah okay and it's like all about the fish when i posted today's guest co-host yeah i didn't see what did you post just one bullet one emoji the fish oh my god crying and it's so funny because i don't identify with a fish you know everybody guessed you that was like the most percentage correct we've ever had that was like 99 correct whereas we've gotten like 98 percent 97 by the way i think we found my new instagram bio just like i should just do the fish but one person one person did guess ellen degeneres because she's dory oh my god hilarious good guess another person did guess page lorenz because she's having a fish moment okay i didn't even know that so thank you for letting me i should get you that sweater for your birthday you should i should caveat by saying like if you know me having been on the toast before like i I don't, you know, I keep up to date like with news and pop culture and things.
9:26But like I don't watch a lot of the like I don't watch a lot of Bravo. I used to back in the day like I was the one I was the gateway drug for Claudia and you like getting involved in it. I was like in the back in the day when people had blogs like before social media where they're like writing dissertations on what happened in the episode. Like that was my Bravo era. So I'm not always like the hippest. And thus I don't know about these things. That's OK. That's OK. But yeah, I'm here for the cardigan. That's why I came here today. When Jackie's like, you want to co-host on Friday? I'm like, perfect.
9:54Let me insert my agenda into this episode. You're going to use your platform. And I do want to use our platform to say that we're thinking of the people in Israel. And we stand with you. And we love you. And they're just in our thoughts and prayers. It's a really insane time right now. But go get them. Agreed. Go get them. Am Yisrael Chai, baby. Am Yisrael Chai. We have a great show. And I do want to get into the stories because I want to get to all five stories. Because the last two days we've only been doing four. and I do want to do dear toasters because I value my life and yours as well. And like you don't know.
10:22And I love I love dear toasters. And I also feel like you the DT community when they don't get it. Yeah, no. But also I feel like the stories I might not have the most to share because I'm not like a pop culture fiend. So actually that works perfectly for me. OK, great. The story is actually pretty interesting today, a little varied. And I'm going to talk about Love Island, even though I'm not all the way cut up. There has been some news as people are coming off the island and doing podcasts and such that I want to discuss. And I feel like every day I've tried to work it in, but not everyone's watching.
10:51And I'm just going to bore my sister with it instead. And that's totally fine. I do not watch. I wouldn't do that to a stranger, but I'll do it to my big sis. That's me. So without further ado, let's get into the Fast Five stories that you do need to know. And today's episode is brought to you by Taylor Farms. Yes, I've been plotting my lunch today by Taylor Farms all week. Actually, I discussed it with Shannon, but today I'll be having the Mexican street corn salad. I have black beans. I have corn and I'm picking up some fresh guac to put on top. I've been dreaming of the salad all week. I've just been too lazy to like put it to literally go and get or make guacamole.
11:28But Taylor Farms literally makes it so easy. And that's what I'll be having for lunch. Taylor Farms is the best thing that's ever happened to me as a salad lover and a lazy girl because they take out all the chopping, all the washing, all the thinking of like, how should I dress up my salad today? You don't have to be creative. You don't have to think of recipe combos because Taylor Farms has all of them. They have sweet kale, Caesar, avocado ranch, Mediterranean crunch. I know every time I go to your house, you put out a salad with dinner and it's always a Taylor Farms salad with a little bit of a trout twist.
11:56Like they, that's the best part of Taylor Farms. You can eat them as is. They're amazing. Or you can put your faves on top, your favorite protein, your favorite fresh vegetable, like whatever it is, do it. Yeah, and I do. You know, I'm only second to you in the Taylor Farms obsession, beans and halloumi. Mediterranean is my salad. That is her go-to. Mediterranean, add beans, add halloumi. The balsamic vinaigrette in it is so good. That's what makes it. I completely agree. I don't know what they put in there, but I'm always trying to recreate it, but I can't. It's so good. It's so good. Their dressings are so good.
12:26They're super fresh, crisp, delicious. The whole family loves them. No chopping, slicing, or leaving half a cabbage in your fridge. They're fresh, yummy, and everything is in the kit. So grab a Taylor Farms chopped salad kit and get your salad together. They're available at all major grocery stores. Today's episode is also brought to you by Symbiotica. I do really feel like everyone's talking about Symbiotica. All the like wellness places that I go to when you go to the checkout counter, like they have the tinctures of Symbiotica because they are the best in wellness. Their supplements are one of the easiest ways to stay consistent with health goals, even during a busy summer.
13:01So their supplements contain Irish sea moss and liposomal vitamin C. Sea moss, again, something everyone's talking about for a reason, because it supports gut health for smoother digestion, promotes clear, radiant complexion, and fuels cellular energy to support healthy aging. Vitamin C, I mean, we've known the benefits for a long time, but it also benefits collagen production, glowing skin, antioxidants, and is an immunity booster. Weirdly, even though the weather's getting better, it's still sixth season, and you want to keep your immunity up, and the symbiotica tincture is the perfect thing to help you do that.
13:34I actually have one in my bag. Oh. Yeah, the creatine. I love that. Because I feel like everybody's talking about that too. Everyone is talking about creatine. I know. So I saw it at Sprouts and I was like, I need this. And I bought a couple. Amazing. But you, my dear friend, can go to symbiotica.com slash toast today to get 20 % off plus free shipping. Bet you didn't get 20 % off. No, I didn't. That's C-Y-M-B-I-O-T-I-K-A dot com slash toast to get 20 % off plus free shipping at Symbiotica. Definitely check it out to up your wellness goals. And today's episode of The Toast is brought to you by Booking.com.
14:10Booking.yayup. From vacation rentals to hotels across the U.S., Booking.com has the ideal summer stay for absolutely anyone, even those who might seem impossible to please. whether you're booking for yourself your partner picky teens or your sleep light rise early mom you can find exactly what you're booking for on booking.com so olivia and i actually have very similar preferences when it comes to booking a stay at a hotel because we both have young children so we need like multiple rooms we would prefer a kitchen definitely a fridge a dishwasher oh my god that'd be amazing a space where the adults can hang out while the kids sleep like just convertible rooms we have a lot of like small details that would just make the trip better if we could have them and with booking.com you can let them know your preferences and find the perfect stay it is so so great for that because you want to enjoy your vacation but hotel stays are more personal than comedy more personal than food some people need a bathtub in their room I do yeah I mean I do for the kids but like Claudia does you know and it's like if she doesn't have a bath then like that's just not going to be a par delicious experience for her 100 % and you're going on like vacation you're taking the time you're spending the money you should get what you want And Booking.com makes it so easy to find your perfect stay.
15:20If we can find our perfect stay on Booking.com, anyone can. Find exactly what you're booking for at Booking.com, Booking.yeah. Book today on the site or in the app. I am going to make you say that one time just for fun, just for kicks. Booking.com, Booking.yeah. Booking.com, Booking.yeah. Heya. By the way, I have to say, as a marketing person, I always think the live ad reads are amazing. But the brand partners that align with the toast, like it's so solid. It's really fabulous. And I commend you a lot on that front. Thank you so much. We take a lot of pride in that. And also, it's really hard not to start every ad with, this is my favorite sponsor.
16:00But like, they're literally all my favorite sponsor. I love every single brand that you just talked about. And I feel like even though you're like, I'm doing the ad read, you don't have to chime in. It's like, I wanted to chime in because I had something positive to say. It's the marketer in you. It is the marketer in me. You are the marketer in me. I was going to do, I got the marketer in me. That's better. Every time she touched that ad, it turns into gold. Into gold. Everybody knows she's got the market in her. Market? I got the market? You do have the market. You have trends and forecasts.
16:35Super market. Our first story, Taylor Swift and Travis Kelsey are a winning pair on a date to game four of the Stanley Cup final. So Lerd and Viss took their Florida talents to the Stanley Cup final at Amaranth Bank Arena in Sunrise, Florida on Thursday night to watch the Oilers take on the Panthers for the Stanley Cup. I don't know who won the game, but from my vantage point, like the Panthers are going to win the Stanley Cup. Is that what the word on the street is? but they did okay hoping that they are but they didn't win the game last night which okay good we have more games maybe they'll go to another one we should go to one but i'm just like really busy right now no this is what i wanted to say and i'm so glad this is the first story i kind of knew it was going to be a story not necessarily the first but between jared freed and me being here on the toast and obviously like everyone coming through the florida studio us doing like live episodes from florida like everything's coming up florida is what you're 100 % I know I just I feel it too I was in New York this week for a business trip and everyone's like oh what are you up to and I'm like well you know like I live in Florida now they're like you do do you like it I'm like I fucking love it you know I get a lot of messages in my dms of like people contemplate like I really want to move to Florida I'm moving like what do you think and it's just like such a good life it's just like a happy peaceful blissful sunshine filled life and by the way like we always talk about this like the weather is not necessarily my favorite part I mean hello 90 degree weather wearing full black outfit like I I do like winter clothing and like I like a cool breeze and such and so um like weather isn't even at like the top of my list of like reasons to weather is at the bottom of my list I know of things about Florida but it's not my favorite one it's the best it is the best and I also think coming from New York and like having this huge like shift in lifestyle like we love like the slowed down pace and like the peace and quiet and I hope that like for everyone who lives in like suburban areas of the country that that's how they feel about where they live.
18:28A hundred percent. And they probably do. And it's not just because of the weather, because I just really want to reiterate, like the weather is my least favorite part about living here. The only thing that's good about the weather is that it's amazing for the kids. The fact that you don't have to like throw your kid in a jacket and then in the car. And like, it's just like a lot. And I feel like the kids just like are out and running and jumping and playing and swimming and dancing and happy and feet in the grass and the dirt and the, you know, like it's just such a wonderful life for them. So for them, I say the weather could be top of the list.
18:55But it's not necessarily about the weather, but it's about like the vitamin D and the sunshine. And the ability to be outside almost 365 days of the year, because even when the weather is bad, like half the day, it's good. And then the other half, it rains for 10 minutes and then the sun comes out. It's crazy. Yeah, they're outside every single day, every single day. No, it's the best. So, yeah, Travis and Taylor, welcome to South Florida. There's a reason why you're here and there's a reason why we're here. It's just the fucking best. You know, it's so funny. And it is funny that they're here.
19:21This is like the worst time of year. I know I was thinking that too um but they seem to be enjoying it like when she has a house in Rhode Island like no offense I love Florida like why the fuck are you here no 100 % I think the other thing too um that I wanted to say about this that my lost my train of thought so when it comes back to me like I'll say it so great you know but I do have a lot of things to say on this topic I just think that oh I remember what I was gonna say since we moved down here have you noticed that like all the teams are like killing it like you know there was like FAU was in the Elite Eight.
19:53I don't think they had ever been there before. The Miami Dolphins, go Dolphins. Fins up. Yes, I have noticed that. I feel like the Miami Heat has always been in the mix too. I won't take credit for the Heat, but I will take credit for the Panthers. The Panthers, yeah. I will take credit for the Finns when they're doing well. Jacksonville Jaguars, you're welcome. You're welcome. Tampa Bay Buccaneers, you know? it's just like they they had a winning season though without us here so i'm just saying like florida sports it's like yeah creme de la creme baby yeah i think like you know the vibes are high yeah and they're all the players are feeling it ever since we got here yeah and taylor does have like some sort of relationship with florida she has a like she references a lot on the album Florida song you know move to Florida buy a Tesla on Fortnite so I wonder how she feels about it I wouldn't tap her as a Florida person no like Travis is definitely leading the charge like he loves golf yeah totally he's like in the gym in Miami like I'm sure there's like a lot of really good sports trainers down here but it's really nice of her to like be with him and it seems like she's enjoying it no totally and I'm interested to see like how much time they actually actually spent here because I think your point is super fair like summer is not a time that people like flock to Florida but here they are how long are they going to stay are they going to come back are they going to purchase a property like what's their vibe you know yeah like if he does retire after next year like maybe they'll be snowbirds because they can't live here during the season because he needs to be in Kansas City but also they've been hitting up a lot of the restaurants hot spots in the South Florida area which you do too and like I feel like the odds of you crossing paths with them is kind of high because like a lot of you've been to all the restaurants that they've been to right most of them I haven't been to Bukan and I saw that they were there and that's where they got like you know snapped a lot of photos when I saw the awning I was like what's that one because it wasn't familiar to me and then I realized I'm like it's because I haven't been there well I think you should just continue on like your restaurant like your usual business yeah no but that's like not my that's not like what I do so like I feel like if I go out of my way to go I'm certainly not gonna see her and then I'll just have wasted my time do you think she also eats dinner at 5 45 though like that's probably the problem with your husband like and you guys do date night and you're really good about that and you try like you go to all the good restaurants yeah well we like to eat so you know that's just like a big part like that's just a big part of your relationship like 100 yeah zach and i like even when we get a date night like we still go to hillstone yeah or like i was gonna say you go to the same two places yeah but i love that for you you know and that's that's us yeah that's us so i'm just saying that's gonna be taylor like she's like you've tried a lot of different things a little bit and then like you hone in on the things that you like, you know?
22:33Yellowstone, I mean, you've been going to for like 20 years, so I don't know about that. No, and like we even went to it in New York, but that's just that kind of like we're creatures of habit. So I just want to say like if anybody is going to spot Taylor in the wild, it is going to be Olivia. So watch this space. Yeah, I actually haven't been thinking about it that way, but like maybe I'll make it my mission. No, I think if you make it your mission, it won't happen. So what I'm saying to you is just keep doing what you're doing and I think something will happen. Okay. Yeah. Keep it posted. our next story, Sabrina Carpenter is like in a little bit of controversy with her new album.
23:02So we talked about yesterday how she announced her new album, um, man's best friend. She has a single out called man eater, which I did get to listen to this morning. And it's so amazing. And the album cover for man's best friend is like getting some flack for being like misogynistic. Um, I want to pull up the photo. I saw this photo so many times in association with like Sabrina's announcements. And I was just like, I didn't even think about it, But I was like, why do I keep seeing this photo? Like, did she just post it on Instagram so everybody's using it? Is it like the dog collar one? Yeah.
23:31No, it's this one where she's like on all fours. Someone's pulling her hair like. Oh, yeah, yeah. That's why I said dog collar. It's giving it. Yeah. And people are upset because they find it like degrading towards women, like very male gaze. And now it's like a referendum on Sabrina's brand of feminine sexuality, which all of that I don't agree with. But I do agree that I do not like this cover. First of all, it doesn't look like an album cover. I saw it so many times before I realized it's an album cover. Yeah. I thought it was just like a shitty picture on Instagram. Like a photo shoot or something.
24:01It's not premium. I agree. And it's like, it's not my favorite message. And I love Breen. What was the other one from her other album? Was it like big bubble gum vibes? Like it was blue with pink, right? It was more like her face, short and sweet album. Like, yeah. I don't know why I was giving like. Yeah. With her face with the little kiss on the back. Oh yeah. Yeah. Now that's an album cover. No, I saw. This looks like it was taken on an iPhone and put through VSCO cam. Like, that's not an album cover. I saw some discussion. I think it was Liz Woods where people were just saying, you know, like, it's just not a great image for young girls.
24:38Like, we could just be doing so much better. And I just have to say, like, I think I really agree with that. Like, I just think, you know, at the end of the day, like we also her audience, I think, is so vast. Right. Like, it's multigenerational at this point. But I think I really hope that a lot of the stars of today, like take the responsibility of the messages that they put out to the youngest of their generations. And I think in this case, this is more of like that sort of like mainstream, multi-generational, like provocative sort of cover art, which like I respect, like you're free to do whatever you want.
25:11I just, you know, when you have a platform, you have to be responsible. I actually like, you know, I'm not the biggest Taylor Swift fan on earth. Like I never went to the Eros tour. Like I like her music, but I just, you know, I'm not like going to like lay down for her. But I actually think this she takes her role very seriously in that regard of just being like a little bit more wholesome and being that sort of more. But by the way, she had like bad blood. Like she had eras where she was like a little provocative, too. But I think generally speaking, I find her to be a bit more wholesome. And I just think that.
25:43I think the kids today could use a little bit more wholesomeness. yeah I've always loved Sabrina and I love like the feminine sexy girly vibe she puts out but there's always been like a thing about her that's very raunchy and I've always said in like that's just like a funny like there's so much in endo in her music and like maybe the younger fans don't get it and it's like really for the older fans and like it's cute and also she's like well into her 20s like this is she's singing about her life and her experiences and like this is what she's actually going through and I just feel like sometimes like the raunch is cranked up too high and I hate to like be that prudish person but this is a no from me I'm still gonna but the thing about me is like I don't need to like boycott Sabrina not listen to him no I still I stand so hard but I'm allowed to say like this is not my favorite one yeah no and I think that's fair and I think also the thing that I think about and I'm sure you do too is like when you play these songs in the car like especially if you're playing it like on CarPlay or something like that like the cover art does come up in like a Spotify or Apple Music and so like when you have young kids in the back of the car I mean again my kids are five and two and a half but again the images that they're seeing I just think like generally speaking like we can be doing better because like honestly like I agree like her music is a bop my kayler would absolutely love it but like I don't necessarily and they love to look at the cover art they're like I want to see I want to see you know and they identify like you know sometimes like in my car where all the things recently played comes up and they like they see it and then that's how they know what they want so it's just that visual sort of recognition and imagery that I think generally speaking we could do better but I also agree with you it's just like it's not a great photo like it's not high res it's giving like like submissive yeah it's like low quality I don't like the message I don't like the look of it even yesterday she's on the cover of Rolling Stone and she's naked on the cover her hair is like covering her bits and it's very tasteful like if that were an album cover I would have no problem with it like it's artistic and it's beautiful this is neither of those things.
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27:35I agree. I agree. And I'm so sorry. And you guys know how I feel about Breen and like she can do no wrong, but this is not my favorite one. Yeah. And it's not favorite. That's the thing. It's like, it's not necessarily doing anything wrong. It's a personal preference and taste and it's not ours. Yeah. She also had a funny clap back because people were like, her music is so sexual. Like, why does she have to make music like this? And she's like, you guys are the ones making it popular. Like my most sexual songs are my biggest hits. Like that's on you. A hundred percent. Which is also true. I also think with music, it's very different because like words can be interpreted so differently for people like versus like the visual it's like the movie shrek like when you watch it as a kid it's like such a cute animated film and when you watch it as an adult you're like shrek said what yeah you know and i think that's cool and it's like it's like sophisticated humor and it's the innuendo that's like fine by me and i don't find her music to be too sexual but like this is just like it's not it's not the best Yeah.
28:27Our next story, the Traders season four rumored cast list has leaked. 16 stars have been named, including one past contestant, several reality stars and Donna Kelsey. I did see this because I saw Donna Kelsey kind of obsessed. Yeah. So that's kind of the headline here. Donna Kelsey might be on Traders. I think that's a really great casting. I think it's obviously really good for the show, but good for like Mama Kelsey because she's she's in the zeitgeist. By the way, 100 percent. I know nothing about traitors. Never seen an episode. Don't even know what it's about. But I agree. Like, I love this for Mama Kelsey.
29:01Also, like Jason just retired. Obviously, they have the podcast. It's very successful. Travis is not going to play for forever. But like Mama Kelsey is like making a name for herself. Yeah. You know, and good for her. Like Mama Kelsey's got agents and managers and like this is the next step for Mama Kelsey. They're doing it right for her. Yeah. Yeah. Like to go to a castle in Scotland, like go off queen. Totally. Some of the other people who have been rumored, one person in particular sparking my interest, Maura Higgins from Love Island Season 5 UK. That's Molly Mae's season. Okay. Maura was, I don't know why I feel like I'm saying her name wrong.
29:33Maura? I don't know why. I don't know her. Why it sounds wrong to me. But Maura or Maura. Whatever your name is. Literally one of my favorite people. Whatever your name is, she loves you. One of my favorite people I've ever encountered on reality television. Oh, amazing. So beautiful, so funny, so cute. And we need more Maura. So that can't be right. More Maura? Maura? I don't know. Maura. Maybe Maura. It's M-A-U-R-A? Yeah. Maura? Maura? I don't know. Now everything sounds wrong to me. I know. And if you look at it, it's going to look wrong too. So she's rumored. I think that would be amazing.
30:12I have never watched Traders. It's something that I'm open to watching just because people really love it. and like Maura Higgins would get me to watch it. I think that was right. The way you just said it. That's how I've been saying it the whole time. And that's kind of why I like Mama Kelsey for this because like I feel like she can be like big mama bear vibes. You know, again, I don't necessarily know what the show is about, but I feel like there's always people that come in with an agenda to be like super aggressive and like backstabbing. And like, I just like, that's not what she's going to come to.
30:38That's not her energy. So like, I kind of love, maybe you'll be catching me watching Trader season four. Probably not. I feel like her strength is that that's what you think of her. You know, she could be like the villain. It's all about like lying. Like who's a faithful. It's also editing. No, no, no, no, no. It's a game of like. Like trusting in people. Trusting people, trying to find people, like who's the villain. Like some people are like called the traitors or whatever. They're just deemed that by like production, I think. Right. This is just what I've gleaned. And then the faithfuls have to find out who are the traitors.
31:11And I think like everyone would just assume that Donna Kelsey is being honest and, you know, and she could use that to her advantage to win. Yeah, I think the other thing, too, is that that is so obvious that it might be the other way around. And she would be a faithful because like taking this. Being a faithful is so obvious. I think she will be the traitor. All right. We'll see what happens. Portia Williams is a rumor contestant. Candards, Dillard, Bessette, both from. It's usually a lot of Bravo people, right? Both from Real Housewives. Lisa Rinna is rumored. Mark Ballas from Dancing with the Stars.
31:40Colton Underwood Throwback Thursday Monet X Like Lisa Rinna is giving like 100 % would be a villain Do you know what I mean? Like in an obvious sort of way Yeah Dorinda's rumored to return She was like a big She was big on the last season Is there a winner? Last season four people won Okay that's not my favorite either But I've moved on from it Then a bunch of other people I don't know Johnny Weir Interesting okay sounds like a good mix Yeah, it does. And I think it's people from all different corners of reality television. So unless you seriously watch every TV show under the sun, you're not going to know everyone.
32:17And you get to meet new people. And that's fun. Yeah, totally. Yeah. So I'm kind of like staying open. It depends like when Traders is on. I feel like it wouldn't be on for a while. Yeah, that usually announce the cast. Yeah, I could have some time on my hands. I'm going to do some promo, you know. Couldn't be right now because I'm watching Love Island every single night. Except for last night. What did you do last night? I saw your chicken rocks. They looked so yummy. I made chicken rocks and then I tried to watch a little bit more of good friends and your friends and neighbors. Yeah. I'm halfway through the last episode, but I just couldn't focus because there was a lot going on in the world.
32:52So I was like, I literally have to keep her winding. I'm like, let me just watch this another time. Yeah. What do you think? I like it. I just wonder what's going to happen in the last episode that will like make it whole. Yeah. You know, it's I liked it, too, in the sense that it's like beautiful, interesting cast. Setting. But like so fucking unrealistic. like I just sometimes I can't with just like how unrealistic some of these shows are you know does something happen in the last episode that like we move the plot forward yeah okay obviously okay but definitely sets up for another season okay yeah great that's what I need because right now I'm just like okay bruv you're going to jail um no keep watching good luck watching okay good because I like I don't want him to go to jail because like he's our protagonist but also like you're a criminal a hundred percent you should be there you should be there anyway yeah but not for that not for that right right it's very different um our next story is some grammys news because grammys have discussed changes for their 2026 ceremonies and nominations so there will be new grammy categories more grammy nominees and more expansive representation so the recording academy ceo harvey mason jr was discussing all of the changes here are the changes two new grammy categories best traditional country album and best album cover so now we will have best traditional country album and best contemporary country album okay instead of having one category for both okay best album cover is so fucking weird and stupid to me agreed and sabrina will not be winning um but actually you never know like those are the types of things that win you know because everything is like such a game it's all around like the publicity and the promotional strategy but like i actually i'm sure whatever wins the best album cover still won't be my favorite album cover but it won't be that couldn't agree more couldn't agree more um so people are really shook up about best country traditional and best contemporary and that's obviously like a function of what's been going on in the country world like there's a lot more new pop country of course cowboy carter winning best country album and best album do you think that was the impetus for this i can't imagine it was like the entire reason because that was one album and it's over You made it through.
35:00You didn't have that category last like for Cowboy Carter. So like we've made it through. It's OK. Like we could go back to one. I'm always happy to see like more country representation. It means more country artists will get nominated for Grammys. More will attend the Grammys. More might perform at the Grammys. So like I'm cool with that. But other than Cowboy Carter, like what's contemporary country album? Like that doesn't fall into traditional because like there's a lot of content. Like even Morgan Wallen is contemporary country. He's not traditional country. That's what I was going to say.
35:29Like, I listen to Sirius X on the highway, like a lot in my car and all that seems very contemporary. And like, they're like the country music station where they play like a wide range of stuff and like, but it's like, is Megan Maroney contemporary? Is, uh, who's the girl? Um, Ella Langley. Like, I feel like that's contemporary. Yeah. But not enough to be in a separate category. Yeah. It's interesting. They need, they need a good description on like how they're going to differentiate. But again, like I'm glad that means double the amount of country albums get nominated and stars get recognized, whereas they usually they're all snubbed because they've not had enough representation into one cat.
36:05Yeah, no, I actually I agree with that. I just think they need to be clear on where the line is. I think they also maybe need to change like contemporary to pop, you know, and be like a little bit more specific on what contemporary means. Would Taylor Swift's country albums have been contemporary country? Yes, probably. And like Garth Brooks is like traditional. Yeah. Well, it's easy to Luke is traditional. No, but like Luke is also contemporary. I don't know. I don't know either. I don't know. So, yeah. Yeah. Miranda Lambert is like giving it's like Miranda. I don't know. I was going to say, what's her face?
36:40Lainey Wilson. Like, she's very traditional, but it's contemporary, you know? Yeah. I'll have to like, once I see it, I'll be able to really say, but so far, um, so far confused, but happy for the news. Yeah. I'm not, I'm not mad at it for the country music community, but also with things like this, I feel like they set themselves up for failure because they don't actually like do a good job of like delineating between the categories. And then it just kind of becomes a clusterfuck. And I feel like in three years from now, you'll be like, well, the Grammys are revamping all their categories and it's back to one for, do you know what I mean?
37:13Because like they weren't clear on what it was that it didn't work out. Yeah. And people are just always looking for things to uproar about anyway so give it to them yeah i feel like also some of their like have been djs who have done stuff in the country space like diplo like that would be contemporary right old town road yeah i'm gonna take my but that wasn't an album so i didn't even know what that would be yeah interesting i think that just was like in best new song right yeah um some more changes will allow for like more artists and creators to be nominated for example in the classical categories composers and lyricists are now eligible for Grammy recognition I'm here for that because it's music and because it's not going to be televised so like what do I give a damn if more people win Grammys great right right happy for you yeah um are you ready for a fifth and final story yes and then I'm ready for dear toast is baby are you going to do love island first and then dear toasters final story will lead into a love island recap because they are related but I first need to let you know that today's episode of the toast is brought to you by quince As temperatures start rising, we feel that familiar urge to refresh our closets, but I'm not going to waste money on pieces I'll wear only once for just one season.
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40:14It's universal. Oh, good. Yeah. No, one time I shared a story about how I did punch a self checkout machine and that was not something that I'm super proud of, but it definitely did happen. Square is really, it's taking the punching out of checking out. Square is so easy to use. If you're running a business, it involves a lot of moving parts and Square helps simplify that. The hardware looks polished and fits right into your space without feeling intrusive and the software is incredibly straightforward and intuitive. You don't need special training. You can just set it up and start taking payments quickly.
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41:55So do it with Square. can I just add one thing to that obviously um one thing that I've heard neglected to mention in my upfront recap about myself is that like I live and die by the farmer's market and the farmer's market is powered by Square like I literally don't even bring a wallet like it's so phenomenal so five for five on the ads today I just had to add that in thank you our fifth and final story is Bella from Love Island who was spoiler alert eliminated this week a few days ago though I saw her elimination she now is back in the real world and doing interviews and talking about her experience and she told People Magazine the one connection she wishes she explored on Love Island so apparently behind the scenes Bella actually had chemistry with Taylor who is the cowboy.
42:46So Bella was like all in on Nick. And then Nick didn't pick her because he picked someone else. And now she's didn't get to stay on the island. But she said Taylor and I had this kind of crazy strong chemistry that neither one of us really expected. She said that she didn't wind up pursuing it because she's a girl's girl. And he was with Alondria. And yeah, she wouldn't want to have stepped on any toes. And honestly, that wouldn't have really played well if like things started going south with Nick. And then she was like, well, Taylor and I and it'd be like, it would be reading as desperate so honestly I really don't know how she could have even gone about that and it's better that she just went home with like her dignity because whenever somebody does that like a last Hail Mary it's just like giving desperation and you want to stay on the show though I do believe her that she says that they did have a connection I don't know how that would have come off if she tried to pursue it she said she felt a connection to him but she didn't want to feel like you're stabbing your girl in the back because you're pulling her man for a conversation She says her loyalty to her really, really stopped her from exploring things with Taylor.
43:44Unfortunately, Bella didn't get to watch the show and see that it seems as though Taylor and Alondria have zero chemistry. So I don't even think Alondria would have been that mad. It doesn't seem like Taylor has chemistry with anyone, so I'm shocked that he had some with Bella. But what do you know? I'm sure there's a lot that we don't see, even though we're watching every single night and they put the most boring footage into the show. But I'm sure there's still other stuff that we don't see. I heard last night like two new bombshells entered the villa I don't think people are excited about them but I I have to watch for myself uh other than that the last that I saw was after the pie challenge and Ace and Amaya are just being like seriously the worst and Ace is like dead wrong because to me the most shocking thing in the two weeks that I've been watching is that Ace chose Amaya at the recoupling ceremony when the whole time it's been this like cat and mouse game with Shelly like they should have been coupled up from the first jump but then he was snagged by the girl who was kicked off after one day um I don't really I don't remember her name but she literally they woke up one morning and they were like she's gone home because she had like old that she went she got on the show yeah then people like were like this is everything she said on the internet and they're like literally overnight she was gone so then Ace was free to like explore his connection with Shelly and they had like met outside a club in New York one time.
45:05So they felt like it was fate that brought them together to the show. And they like really like were always just like eyeing each other. And it sort of felt like everything was working for them to like get coupled up together. And then he literally has the opportunity to choose anyone he wants to couple up with. And he does not choose Shelly. He chooses Amaya. So I was like, oh, I guess him and Shelly like don't like each other like that. And I just missed that. And that in the 24 hours he's known Amaya, like he really likes her. I literally had to rewind because I wasn't paying attention. And then I saw the girl standing there at the end and it was Sierra, Bella and Shelly.
45:34I'm like, why is Shelly still there? Who chose Amaya? It was seriously shocking. But now I understand why he chose Amaya. He is seriously like manipulative and did it to toy with Shelly. I think to like make her mad and like play the game a little bit more. And the thing is, is Shelly didn't give a fuck. I don't think Shelly likes him that much. So she was like, OK, you're into Amaya. Cool. I'm going to continue to explore what I think I might have with Austin. I don't think she really likes anyone that more much and just doesn't care. So it really backfired for Ace because instead of like getting close to Shelly all week, sleeping in bed with her, cuddling with her and like exploring their relationship, he like tried to, I don't know, like be a dick and like show her what she's missing.
46:13And instead he wound up in a couple with someone he doesn't like. And then he had to like try and tell her he was trying to tell her like, I'm keeping my options open, you know, but it was like nobody like you just recoupled why why can't you just enjoy this moment if you like this girl a little bit like enjoy the recoupling and then later be like still like open of course everybody's open there even huda and jeremiah are technically still open it's the first week like nobody's married i don't think it needed to be said and he started being like i have these boundaries and it was just like for lack of a better word gaslighting her because she was like of course all of those things are true but why are you saying that to me right now unfortunately amaya is also off the rails because her reactions to everything like she was totally done dirty by ace but like then her reactions were so big and insane like she's the bad guy now it's really so crazy so the two of them like literally can't even look at each other um and i'm sort of like off of ace and i think shelly deserves better and i think he totally like fucked up like really so i don't know where we go from here i will be caught up by monday but that's just a little love island recap tap.
47:17My faves so far, it's hard to have faves, but I really like Alondria. Like I think she has her head screwed on right when it comes to matters in the villa. And like when she's giving someone advice, like it is sound advice, like go with her, trust her. Some of the girls just say like, literally don't do that. Or like the guys will say something. I'm like, that's really bad advice. And then fave couple, Nata and Jeremiah. I don't know how people feel about them, but they just like got married on day one and now it's like getting weird. Yeah. It's really weird. they're not my favorite I like having Charlie Charlie he's so cute I'm glad he found someone and then everyone else doesn't have chemistry but wants to stay on the show so they're like faking it other people come in and maybe they'll meet someone yeah but if they don't they go home like if you don't wind up in a couple and then there's recoupling ceremonies if nobody chooses you you go home so like you gotta make something work but you also can't look so phony right right it's a tough line to walk it's a tough line I do not watch this show also I think like for me it doesn't work because like what's on like every night and there's a zillion episodes like you your girl needs to be watching like her crime murder mystery dramas like harlan cobin is waiting for you ain't nobody got time for that but i will say i mean it's just like you always have to look at these things through the lens of like who's on here to get some instagram followers and some deals after the fact yeah it's like so it's like hard to really take any of these you need to understand at this point every single one of them is a content creator benefits from being on the show wants to be on the show and like i don't even think you can call anyone like it's not like oh she's here for the wrong reasons she's here to get famous you all are so now that that's like the playing field it's even that's like we just know that and that's I can accept that it just makes me so mad because when Molly Mae was on season five of UK she was the only one whose job description was influencer like fashion influencer and the public did not like her the entire time they thought that she was there just to get famous and use the situation which every single person is there to do that even if their thing says nurse you know they still want to be have this platform.
49:16Oh my god the people that are like a nurse or teacher almost even worse you know because they're like not even being up front about their intentions. No but like everyone wants to like quit their job and be a famous person and get paid thousands for brandy's if you can. Like duh so anyways her and Tommy were together the entire time like seriously love conquered all with the two of them. The best couple that's ever come from Love Island as we know. That I do know. I actually follow Molly May because of you and I really enjoy her content. They did not win their season because the public did not vote for them because they did not like her because they thought that she was using Tommy and using the whole situation that she was faking it the entire time.
49:50Which, by the way, you all were wrong if you want to admit that. And the person who won their season was someone who had been like betrayed by the guy she was with the whole time. And then like by the end, she was still around at the end. So she just like picked some random guy. And they chose her just to like support her. the guy in her series. I don't even know if they were ever even together or if they were. It was like five days later, they broke up. And she was like a cute girl, but like it's Love Island. Right. And Molly and Tommy were the love in Love Island. And Amber was like just a great cast member, but like they should have won.
50:18And that's the only flaw that I have. So it just bothers me that now we can all accept like, oh yeah, everyone's a content creator and it's going to be an influencer now, but not when it was Molly May's turn. Okay. Ahead of her time, just like Jackson Claude with the cardigans. That the general public is usually wrong. well ain't that the truth now it is time for dear toasters we have made it to dear toasters and we are going to do dear toasters it is our weekly advice segment usually on tuesdays unless the episode is running an hour and a half with a guest co-host and we give advice to the swirlies you can write in at deartosers at gmail.com you can submit a anonymous form on our website either way it will be anonymous on the show we don't even have people's names on here like i i have no idea who wrote this.
50:58I just know that I want to help. So I tried some that I think you'll give good advice. Amazing. I'm so excited. This first one, dear Jackson guest trout. I'm a mom of two, a four year old boy and a one year old girl. My boy is a classic first child and is very sensitive and a mama's boy. He's recently started calling me mama instead of mom, which he's called me mom for the last year. My husband gets really annoyed and says he's too old to be calling me mama, but I literally don't think it's weird. Should I start correcting my son or just let it phase out? Is my husband gay? Because every literally every submission, Claudia is like, your husband's gay.
51:38Oh my God. That's so funny. By the way, your husband is gay. Yeah, no, actually when my kids call me mama, it's like my most favorite thing in the entire world. I think it's so sweet. You know, obviously my daughter is five and my son is two and a half and my daughter's always like I want mama mama and it's like it's so sweet and then Levi copies her um I think your husband is maybe just jealous of the attention yeah that your kids are giving you and also like they can fully call him dada or papa or whatever it is doesn't hit the same but also the other thing too is I don't know if your daughter is or your son actually you said is four right like if he's in like school or a daycare but like you never also know what the kids are picking up from other kids or like if they read a book in school and the mom was called mama and then they came like I just think the husband is looking way too much into this and also like let your kids be like expressive in the names they want to call you I mean look at you like nickname queen you know like you kind of just got to let it roll and if my son is 25 and calls me mama like it will make me the happiest fucking person on earth literally if my son is 50 and calls me mama, like I absolutely love it.
52:46I think your husband is jealous of like the close relationship that you guys have and like there's something so endearing about mama. And yes, as kids get older, they start like calling mom, mom. And it's like, that's so teenager. If you can push that off as long as possible. Yeah. It is so nice and so sweet and everything with kids is a phase. And I think the issue here, there's literally 0 % issue with your four-year-old calling you mama. Like that's the cutest thing. Mama is much more like elevated and like articulate than like mommy, you know? No, then mom. No, mommy is cute. Mommy is cute, but I'm saying like mama is like the creme de la creme.
53:20Like that's what you want to go for. Yeah, but like mom, like. I think if this dear toaster's read, my son is four and he's calling me by my first name or something like rude, you know, like. No, no, no. Your son has done nothing wrong. Your husband is like such a jealous wench. No, your son sounds like a fucking sweet ass angel. And your husband is a jealous wench. I completely agree. And it might be because he's gay. I'm kidding. um he he needs to like be silenced like this is not a thing yeah no it's very sweet and congrats on reverting back to mama like if only we all could do it I was gonna say like congrats your son sounds so loving wonderful sweet delicious you're raising him right I'm so proud of you whoever you are yeah we don't know because it's anonymous true next up this one's kind of crazy hey girlies I need help so my husband's brother my brother-in-law of course has a girlfriend of two years.
54:11I recently found out that he cheated on her at least twice with two different girls that I know personally. My mother-in-law, whom I adore and are very close with, noticed that me and the girlfriend are not super friendly and mentioned it to my husband. My husband's family is very, very close and do everything together, so I do see her often. But the reason I'm keeping her at a distance is if I were to get close to her, I would feel obligated to tell her. I am never rude or mean, just not overly friendly or hanging out outside of family functions. My husband says his brother is very immature and that he has told him to just not be with her if he's going to cheat but he did not listen and moved in with this girl a few days ago my mother-in-law called me and wants me to me and this girl to sit down and work out our issues help okay I have a lot of thoughts here first of all like I understand not wanting to get close with this girl because if you're too close with her like you'll feel obligated to tell her but there definitely has to be like somewhere in the middle where it's not like there needs to be a council meeting called because the two of you aren't getting along.
55:06So I feel like maybe you're pushing her away a little too much. But regardless of that, I think you should tell the mother-in-law why you're acting the way you are. I was just going to say the same thing, especially because she says in there, like, I'm really close with my mother-in-law. I think you just say, like, I'm having a really hard time because like, honestly, like this is not a match. She's not going to be in our family. I'm sorry. Don't say this is not a match. You don't know that. Say I'm having a hard time because your son has cheated on her. And I know if I get close to her, I will feel compelled to tell her, what should I do?
55:37Make it her problem. A hundred percent. A hundred percent. And I wonder if she knows like if her son is a cheater because like also like - Like this is not your problem. Punt the ball. Yeah, a hundred percent. And I don't necessarily think that you're doing anything wrong. Honestly, the way it kind of reads, it seems like you just don't like her in general. Let's be honest here. Like you're using this a little bit as an excuse because like you could be nice enough to somebody and like not be best friends and have to divulge everything. Without other people noticing. But I had the exact same thought.
56:03If your mother-in-law wants you to sit down with her, then you need to sit down with your mother-in-law, who you say you're super close to, and say, this is my problem. I feel really uncomfortable because your son cheated on her. Like, I, you know, it's, if they do wind up together down the line, like, maybe he tells her and they work through it or maybe he tells her. Like, and none of this is in your control because, like, FYI, like, you're not really involved. Yeah. And I would say to the mother-in-law, like, if you want me to have this meeting with her, I am going to tell her. So either call off the meeting, but now you know and you can do what you want with it.
56:35But don't keep making it an issue because if things bubble to a head, I'm going to tell her. I'm also curious to know how this girl knows. She has friends who were the people he cheated with. Like she knows them personally. Well, that kind of makes it really messy for her a little bit. She might just know them personally. Like I don't know that he's hooking up with her best friends, but like I know the girl you cheated with. So I know that it's true. Yeah, yeah, yeah. For sure. For sure. this is simple to me. Make it the mother-in-law's problem. Agree. Agree. This is simple to me. And if she keeps wanting to force the issue, tell the girl.
57:09Like, why not just tell the girl? I mean, of course, you don't want to start issues within a family. So that's why you don't go and tell the girl immediately. But like, if everyone's pushing you like this, tell the girl. Yeah. And I'm also, I come from the camp of like, honesty is the best policy. You know, it's going to come to light in some way, shape or form. And, or, and, or maybe you encourage the mother-in-law to have her son sit down with girl and be like, FYI, like, I really love you. I want to be with you. I've made some mistakes. Like, I want to come clean about them and like move forward.
57:36Do you know what I mean? Like, who knows? Maybe this other girl is very forgiving and like she is going to be okay with it. I don't know. Or so I don't know. But I'm just saying like, it's got to come out at some point. I don't think you necessarily want to be the person that brings it out because like, it's not real. You're not really involved. But yeah, because you are part of this larger family dynamic and you're being pushed to have this friendship with her, even though I kind of feel like you just don't like her in general and you're using this as an excuse she still deserves to know like at the end of the day this girl deserves to know that this guy that she's living with has cheated on her multiple times yeah period full stop because also like she's probably in the prime of her life like she's committed to this guy she lives with him like it's absolutely not fair to her if like down the line this is going to be like a shitty situation and like everybody around her knew like that's so fucking hurtful yeah i could also see the mother-in-law being like okay don't tell her Like, yeah, he did that, but like, don't tell her.
58:26And I don't know why I'm trying to think like, I think then the girl should push one of her friends to like, just message. Just like sort of orchestrate things. So the girl should know. Yeah. Well, as far as your role in this, we've given you your marching orders. Our third and final dear toasters, a married swirly looking for advice. I've been married for two years now and cannot decide whether or not I should change my last name. I am super close with my family and proud of my last name. My husband's family is not as close. I was never welcomed into their family and just don't like them. While I want to share a last name with my husband, I do not want to be associated with his family by having the same last name as them.
59:04My husband won't take my last name and neither of us want to hyphenate what do I do. Well, we're like, I feel like we're poised to answer this because like we're like sort of straddling the lines of changing names, but it's never been because of not wanting to have the other family's name. So like that's kind, I've never even really heard of that, like where you didn't feel welcomed by them and you don't like them. so you're not taking their name. Think of it more as your husband's name. I would kind of try and take that out because that's not... We just hold on to our names. It's our professional name.
59:33Honestly, it's so much paperwork. I know. And so I've changed my name... Socially. Socially, but not legally. I have a lot to say on this. And I feel like I have a really good balance. Does this person have kids? She didn't say. But let's assume they're going to have kids. Okay, because I agree with you. It's not about the name being the name of the family name. It's about, is it important to you to have the same name as your kids? And I think for me, so just my story, I was planning to actually formally change my name. I like brought my passport and all the paperwork with me like every day to work when I was in New York City.
1:00:10Like I was going to find time to hit that social security office downtown in Manhattan. And then the pandemic hit. And like at the time, it was really important for my husband for us to have the same name so that on the birth certificate, we as a family had the same name because I was pregnant with Michaela at the time. And that was the impetus for me going to change my name. But the pandemic hit and social security closed like you couldn't, etc. So here's what I do. I have never formally changed my name, like professionally, like in my corporate, like ASHRAE is I spent, you know, 12 15 years like building my professional brand under my name and so thus I have kept it professionally um on my Instagram I'm Olivia Ashry Shapiro like with everything having to do with my kids and like paperwork for whatnot it's Olivia Ashry Shapiro like nobody knows that I haven't formally changed my name but here's what I do now they do my driver's license is Olivia Ashre because like that is that you can add your married name to your passport if you send in your marriage license so I basically have two forms of documentation like my passport says Olivia Ashre Shapiro so I have like a document with like you know all my same name as my family and then like my license is Olivia Ashre and like I always joke that I have like multiple personalities but like in my personal life I'm like I'm Mrs.
1:01:33Shapiro Mr. Shapiro and like it's just easier for the kids that we all like have the same last name. I never formally changed it. But like in my professional life, like I'm Olivia Oshry. It's interesting. My Instagram is like a crossover between personal and professional. So I'm like Olivia Oshry Shapiro. And sometimes I get packages at my door, Olivia Oshry. And sometimes I get Olivia Oshry Shapiro. And like, to be honest with you, like I just never have thought about it. I just am in the same camp as you that like I'm not fucking doing the paperwork. Like it's way too much work. And I have enough on my plate.
1:02:03So like this is kind of like the hybrid lifestyle that I live. And honestly, like, call me whatever the fuck you want, you know? But I think if you have kids, and it's, I think maybe this person doesn't have kids yet. That was really the only, that was the intention of my husband. And, oh, and by the way, with the birth certificate, like, when I got to the hospital, they were like, you can put whatever fucking name you want there. Like, on the birth certificate, it says Olivia Astray Shapiro. Like, you could just, you could write your name as fucking Rockstar. Like, you can do whatever you want.
1:02:29So, I think you just have to think about it in the context of, like, what do you want your kid's name to be? And then call yourself whatever the fuck you want. If you want to keep your maiden name, go for it. Like, it doesn't matter. Yeah. I think that it's always best if you are going to change your name to do it right after you get married. I think the people who do it that way, like, we automatically, like, everyone has a career that they've built. But, like, even celebrities do it, influencers. And, like, I have to think, like, oh, what's their maiden name? And I can remember it. But it's like, no, she's Lauren Lane now.
1:02:56Yeah. Yeah, 100%. So, like, it can. You got to be, like, all in at once. Or, like, you just stick to it. Dana changed everything about her life. Like, even her name on Venmo. Like the week she got married and like the transition has been seamless. So if you want to do it, you can. I think that when you have kids and they have your husband's last name, because that's what they will have. Because you're not wanting to do hyphen. Yeah. And I understand not wanting to do hyphen. And I understand him not wanting to take your last name. Like we're also in that. Also, do you know like some people like combine the two names together and like make a new last name?
1:03:25I think there's merit to that actually, except I, you know, ancestrally. Yeah, no, you know I'm a genealogy freak. hard to keep it in track like track so um so that's tough it's really an imperfect like the way that it's built right now is it's imperfect it's imperfect like it's really not fair I actually really love the way that we do it which is like for a lot of reasons but like the kids middle names is our last name and then they have obviously you know my husband's last and so they like get the best of both worlds and it's their middle name which like they can use if they want or not But like, I think for us, it's also very different.
1:04:00Everything is like situational, circumstantial. But like with us, the Osherah name is like the four sisters. Like, do you know what I mean? So it was more about preserving that name than leveraging it. We're really attached to that name, just like she's attached to her family name. So I can still relate to that. But I also think when you have kids, like you'll see your husband's last name is their last name. And it might take away from like your feelings towards that last name being about your husband's family. And you're not wanting it for that reason. Like it might just have a different association.
1:04:22So maybe you just wait and see. And I feel like you don't need to make a decision now. I know. And honestly, reading this. At the end of the day, if you're struggling, just don't change your name then. Plenty of people don't need to change their name. And I feel like more and more as time goes on, like modern women are not really changing their names for a number of reasons. So it's really not that crazy. No, I know. But the way that now, if you read this, interestingly enough, like maybe she's like, maybe this Dear Toasters is actually because maybe she's like having a kid and she doesn't know like what last name like the family should use.
1:04:53Do you know what I mean? Less about her. Yeah, his. it's just the way the world works yeah and you can call yourself whatever you want but your kids should if you're married should have his last name unfortunately or hyphen like if and if you're not no no hyphen you have to choose and it's his last name like if we could do it you could do it totally totally claudia we had this conversation before because she like asked ben she was like no ben would totally be down for the kids to have like my last name and she like texted him or called him in the middle of the show and he was so offended yeah no absolutely not no like no and and i'm not saying that's my favorite but no it's kind of just it is what it is what it is and that's the way of the world and it's been that way since the dawn of time not saying that it's the right way and if i could go back i might have had thoughts on the situation yeah but that's the situation agreed agreed it is what it is thank you so much trout skin for co-hosting with me i'm so glad that we got to everything.
1:05:52Where can everyone follow you and keep up with all things trout? You can follow me at Olivia Oshre. Getting back to the whole name thing. Yeah. You can follow me at Olivia Oshre. I, you know, share bits and bobs of my life and my food and my cooking and my life and my whatnot, my thoughts. I have a lot of thoughts. My TV recommendations. You know me. I was up until about 1 a.m. last night watching a new show that I will share once I finish. You know I like to be honest about my recommendations um I don't know what else I mean maybe you can catch me on the Patreon I'm really like a Patreon girly like I don't do the everyday toast as much as I I open up to the patrons that's my place I like I love you know I'm like the number one I don't watch the toast every day but I make sure to really get to almost every Patreon yeah I really enjoyed Claudia's birth story by the way oh so and then I got see but that's the thing it's like I hadn't watched it yet and I got like a million messages like you had a V back like what was that you know so people are always like that's how I'm like I know you're talking about me you know yeah yeah I had a VBAC it was like it's honestly I I am so proud of myself for it I like talk about it all the time yeah no it's really really cool it's so wild things you did that that and I totally agree with Claudia that a c-section is so much worse than vag even though my c-section was like such a completely different situation than most we literally asked you this question months ago and you said vaginal was harder.
1:07:20I don't think I said that. And I think if I, I, I definitely didn't say that. I don't remember, but like, I don't know why you just saying that right now was surprising to me. I said that the recovery in the C-section was different for me because my baby was only, as everybody knows, Michaela was three pounds and I didn't, my baby was in the NICU for a month. So like I was able to go home and take care of myself like in a way that um most people are not like you go home with your baby and you get right to it so maybe that did I say I don't think I said that I think it's in the chat so we could find it but I yeah I will have to we'll fact check that one um but like also fact check me but also know when I was watching it and like all the things she was saying she's like you bitches could never I'm like yeah totally like I'm with you I remember it being like the whole situation was a blur for me by the way maybe i'm changing my mind now yeah and no i loved my v-back you know it's like yeah yeah normally changing your mind anyways we're gonna let you go i love you so much i love you toasters i'll be back on mundaries for week four oh no it's like this like i know your fingers are so weird no show everyone how you're double jointed it's like the craziest thing about her stop and by the way that's like one of the things that i actually hate about the fact that i like cook and film on like I fucking hate my hands like I have such like small like nubs but anyways okay so we're not doing it if you can so like what do I do do your part like this how am I not doing that look at your other fingers oh okay I'm sorry yeah you know my pinky goes like okay I think that's really a circle um love you guys so much have a great weekend
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