The Toothless Wonder: Tuesday, November 11th, 2025

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23:22All right, Ben, are you ready for the Fast Five Stories? I absolutely am. What's her first story. So I chose it for you because normally I wouldn't care because I feel like when it comes to Hilary Duff's music renaissance, I've seen what I've needed to see, but I know you're a really big fan of her. So she is playing her first live show in over a decade. She has announced a mini tour. So it's starting in London, but for the first time in over... Like, why? I know. Why can't you start in America? Because you want to know why? She's probably really nervous and as somebody who has toured before, not musically, comedy, you do do like smaller...

23:52You do? Yeah, you do do. Not less important, but like less high stakes venues before because you're nervous. You know, she's probably working through the songs, the vocals, the in ears. So by the time she gets to New York, she'll probably feel like the show is ready. That's what I would assume. So for the first time in over a decade, the 38-year-old singer and actress announced that she will be returning to the stage for a series of intimate live shows. The tour is called Small Rooms, Big Nerves. It's a mini tour starting in January 2026. She also released her song Mature. So there are four shows.

24:26The first is London. Second is Toronto. Third is Brooklyn. And then four is L.A. Where is the Brooklyn? When is the Brooklyn show? January 27th. Are you going to go? Here's the thing. You're kind of our Hilary Duff correspondent. I was ready to go until I heard intimate. Intimate to me means probably acoustic. I'm not into that. I saw Third Eye Blind acoustic. I didn't need it. I needed them full blast. I actually saw them I think like in like a Brooklyn bar and it sounds really cool like a hundred people third-eye blind guitars No, like the song is meant to be sung the way that it was produced It depends on the person and like their discography there are certain people I would like Taylor Swift songs are all written on guitar like perfect acoustic Queen Some music lends itself to the acoustic You know the drama of the acoustics of the theater and some don't and I would not disagree with you that Hillary does music doesn't really lend itself to the acoustic.

25:20I don't think Coming Clean is going to, is that a great acoustic song? Probably sounds pargy. Some songs are just so good. Can you sing any? What is it? I'm coming clean. No, I didn't get any of the song. Like, what is it? Oh, let the rain fall down. Keep hitting the table. Let it wash away my sanity. Cause I want to feel the thunder. I want to scream. Let the rain fall down. I'm coming clean. Okay, Harmony. This is what Jackie feels like. This is fucking annoying. That was really good. It was, but please don't do it again. That was so good. We also did listen to Hilary Duff's single, remember?

26:01Yeah, I kinda thought it was shite. Yeah, it was shockingly not good, given the fact that she's married to a pretty critically, critically, critically. You're like that newscaster. The tits. A pretty critically acclaimed music producer. It low-key stunk. Yeah. I wasn't a fan. It's just like make a song that sounds exactly like the song that we really like. Right. It's like so rude to her. Like don't evolve. Like don't evolve. Right. She should be able to. But don't. It's sad. But don't. No, really don't. Like just like do what you've done and do it again. You know? Yeah. It's not my favorite. No, it's not my favorite.

26:39But I would love to see her. If the timing works out, I would love to see her. Maybe we can do a little meet and greet. Well, why don't you go? Me and Hillary? And I'll stay home. No, you're coming. No, I just, I don't leave the house much these days. So if I do, it's got to be something I really want to do. Sure. Like the Jonas Brothers. I would go to the Jonas Brothers. Are we going to the Jonas Brothers? What is it? Sunday night. No. We'll be back. Why? Why? Why? No. I'm going. Who am I going with? Am I really going alone with Martha? Maybe your girlfriend. Am I going alone with Martha? Why don't you take your girlfriend?

27:10You don't want to go? No. You don't want to go. No, by the way, I do want to go. But like, you don't know what it's like. I really need to prepare. Okay, so let's just think. Who could they possibly bring out and how pissed will you be? Taylor Swift or Luke Holmes. They'll bring out neither of those people. So I'm good. I'll sleep well. I want like Natalie Ambrosio. Was that what I was saying? Go. Ambruglia. Ambruglia. Have they had Natalie Ambruglia? Definitely. I don't think they have yet. Ben, I'm telling you. Go. Who else? They had Click 5 already, right? Yeah, I would have been pissed. This tour is killing it.

27:41I want to do two stories next about Kris Jenner's birthday party, which we spoke about yesterday, but it looked so sick. And more stuff is coming out about the party that's making me chuckle, but also making me curious. The first is that Meghan Markle was there, which is just crazy and fun. Harry was there too. And Kim posted a picture with her. Kris posted a picture with her. And they both deleted the pictures. What? Yeah. So Kim Kardashian has seemingly removed a photo of Meghan Markle from her Instagram photo dump celebrating Kris Jenner's birthday party. Initially, Kim had included a picture of Meghan in a carousel of pictures.

28:13The image showed Kim and Megan posing together, smiling for the camera. Kim was wearing a slinky purple gown, and then Megan was wearing her black ensemble. And then Harry was spotted in the background, sporting a tuxedo, having a conversation. He was kind of like ruining the photo. And it's gone. That's weird. They were there, and then they weren't. Everybody else in the carousel seems totally untouched. So strange. Yeah, and then Chris had deleted a picture of Harry and Megan, too. Now, it's no secret that they were there. So why the photos would be removed? It does seem like Meghan or Meghan's team just reached out and asked for the photos to be removed.

28:52It's so lame. It's just like the opposite of what she's trying to do. And this is the type of event I feel like that really endears her to people. Everyone's talking about this party. It looks like so much fun. And it's all positive, right? Everybody loved the theme. Everybody's like, the Kardashians do stuff. Sometimes they hate. People hate it. Sometimes people love it. People are like, oh, you're responsible for climate change. But this was just like good old-fashioned fun. It seemed like everybody's loving it. I think it was a really good place for Meghan and Harry to be. You know, Beyonce was there.

29:16Like, everybody, hi. So, like, why you would want that removed? And now we're all talking about the removal. I'm sure she thought, like, nobody would notice. Meghan does not understand how the internet works, for sure. And so she thought, like, it would just get removed and nobody would think anything of it. But, of course, now we're not. Why want it removed? Maybe she liked the way she looked. I don't know. Who cares? No, literally who gives a fuck? The Kardashians are posting you. Right. And you know the Kardashians, like, edit all their photos. And they edit everyone. I'm sure she looked great.

29:38Do you have a picture of her? She looked great. I feel like it had more to do with Harry in the background. You could, he was tilting his head down. You could like kind of see like his bald spots. And there's a lot of talk about whether, there was like an era last year where he wore hats a lot. So people thought he flew to Turkey to get, not flew to Turkey, but you know what I mean, to get his hair transplants. Then he resurfaced still balding. So we were like, oh, nevermind. Maybe he was just really into hats. It was not a great photo of his scalp. Like we know he's the most famous guy in the world.

30:07Like we know you're balding. By the way, that's exactly what it is then. You think? Yeah, Harry wanted it removed because of his ball spot or his team. Sounds like he needs neutrophil. But now we're all talking about it more. No, it was the wrong move. It was the wrong move. Absolutely. I feel like whether it's them or the people around them, they're constantly being given bad advice. Totally. Because everyone knows, no one would have thought anything of the picture. Now we're studying it. Being like, well, maybe they didn't like this. And now we're pointing out all the bad things in the picture.

30:32Whereas we would have just let the picture slide. You know who looked amazing? At the party? Let me think who you're going to say. Oprah? Chris. Oh, agreed. Well, that actually is a great segue into this next story about... Kris Jenner looked amazing. She looked like not even 50. 40. She looked really, really young. And I did see that picture of Oprah. Oprah doesn't look like that. Doesn't look like what? She also... You thought it was an edited photo of Oprah? Unless she also went to the same surgeon and nobody spoke about it as Kris Jenner, Oprah also looked like 30 years younger. So apparently the surgeon was at the party.

31:03Wow. And according to Us Weekly... Doing quick nip and tucks at the party. The plastic surgeon Stephen Levine was the most popular person at the birthday bash. So Levine was a big hit among the guests as his client star-studded birthday bash, and literally the best walking advertisement for his handiwork, Kris Jenner. So the insider said everyone joked that he was the most popular guy at the party, and Jenner and Levine posted a picture together. She included him in her carousel, where Meghan was also removed from. See, if it was Meghan and Harry, they wouldn't have told anybody that she got a facelift.

31:35The Kardashians are so transparent whether you like them or not. They're not actually. Chris is. Recently. Chris is. For years, people have been begging, begging, begging the girls to talk about what they do. And anytime they've spoken about it, it's been like through a veil of truth. It really – You think so? I got a little – yeah. I mean think about Kim's ass. She got it x-rayed on the old show, Keeping Up With The Kardashians, being like there's nothing there. That is not a natural ass. And she still never to this day admitted like what it was. and then a couple of months ago somebody made a TikTok being like Kylie please tell me what you asked for when you got your tits done and then she did right because these tits are like the best tits ever and I want these tits and Kylie commented like here's what I asked for and here's the doctor that I went to and there was so much positive feedback to that being like yes Kylie that now and you can't ignore how different Kris looks like it's so obvious now they're leaning into it 100 % they talked about the facelift on the new season of Kardashians this is a type of transparency people have been begging them for it.

32:35And they came to it in their own time, and I do respect that. But, oh, my God, we've been pleading with them for years, to be honest with us. They look amazing. We just want to know. We're not asking to judge. We're asking because we want to copy it. Got it. Got it. So, yes, you are applauding their transparency. It's a new thing, and I love it. Yeah. And I want more of it. And Chris looks amazing. Chris looks insane. And it's so nice that they invited the doctor. I mean, I heard that a facelift from this guy cost a quarter of a million dollars. He has, like, a four-year wait list. Did he do Bezos?

33:03Bezos' face? His face is different. So is Bradley Cooper's. Oh, we talked about this. We spoke about this. You think Bezos has a different face? I do. I don't look at his face. I do think that Bezos has a different face. Was Caitlyn there? That's a great question because on the new season, it seems like... It seems like they're buds. I didn't see Caitlyn in any pictures. You're right. Caitlyn Jenner birthday bash. I don't think so. Was Caitlyn there?

33:30You're kidding. I don't see anything about it I hate when she's snubbed Me too, because I'm a Caitlyn apologist She's an OG She's fucking hilarious First of all, ooh, this is an interesting article Guess how much the party costs Okay Are they including, like, obviously Bezos didn't charge her for the mansion Right, no, venue is not So it was just like a black tie It was basically like the nicest wedding you've ever been to Where they didn't have to pay for the venue I'm shocked by this figure Probably like a million dollars They had Bruno Mars perform He probably charges Okay, okay But he Is it what she paid Or what somebody would pay?

34:12What she paid? I think she paid Now that I know that Bruno Mars performed I still think a million dollars flat Am I right? I think it's lower than You're so wrong Oh yeah You're so off Luxury party planners This is an estimate by somebody Who plans these types of events According to the Daily Mail See but that's different I know That's different Well, talk about what do you think it cost? Not what you paid. What do you think it cost? I think that it costs between$3 and$4 million. This person's saying it likely costs between$4 and$6.5. Okay, so I was pretty close. I bet Bruno Mars... Did it for free?

34:42No. No. Bruno Mars... But you know he has crazy gambling debt. He doesn't get out of bed for free. Yeah. I think he charges at least$2 million. But I don't think that he charged... I do. ...Biz Jenner that. I do. Yeah. Really? What an amazing performer to have at a birthday. I don't think you could have chosen a better performer. That said, I told you what I want to do, right? By the way, the cost for a private Bruno Mars concert ranges from approximately two and a half to five million dollars. That's insane. But you know what? I don't think that they're, he's probably on the same level as Beyonce.

35:11Yeah. Oh, true. In terms of what someone could charge. He's just as, he's not as famous as Beyonce, but he's, his music is universally beloved. So good. Perfect for old, young generations. He's Apata, but he's also, you know, 24 karat magic. He's kind of, if I could have anyone perform an event of mine, it would be Bruno Mars. Who did we see? We saw like his production partner, DJ. Anderson.Paak. And he was amazing. He's a DJ, yeah. They have like a little band together called. But he like played a lot of Bruno. That's why I was. Yeah, no, they work together a lot. So for my birthday this year, I know that you don't think that I'm going to make it happen.

35:45April 3rd is my birthday, okay? You know who's playing in New York on April 3rd at 6 p.m.? Boys Like Girls. Boys Like Girls. What are they doing after? probably nothing so I'm gonna get them yeah I was like okay we can go see Boys Like Girls for your birthday he's like no no I want them to perform for me privately I want them to perform for me what do you think they would charge me for a private concert a hundred people again they're already there right it's gravy it's not the thing is with these performances it's more so about you have to pay for the sound system the tech like that's what makes it is there any chance that they hear this and they just say I want to do it for free no Boys Like Girls by the way I want this for my birthday She fucking wants this I am the biggest Boys Like Girls fan The biggest Yeah You literally like songs That I had never even heard of Yeah What's your favorite song?

36:35I was like low-key emo What's your favorite song? Turn it up It's five minutes To midnight You're coming home With me tonight Yeah That was a great harmony Yeah it was That was sick We should start An emo Punk alt rock band Why do you have to take it too far? Because we should start We should just have a nice moment You wanna start a band? No Come on. This thing's story nobody cares about, but I do. Who is it? Sydney Sweeney. So she's been promoting this turnt movie, Christy. Do you know about it? Yeah. So it's a type of movie where she's taking herself so seriously. She's gained 30 pounds. She became ugly.

37:10She did this whole body transformation. I believe she's a producer. She's a lot vested in this movie. And it's just like she's doing so much for this movie, and I don't understand why. And now the box office numbers have come out, and they're truly abysmal. Sydney Sweeney's movie, Christie, has ranked among the worst wide box office openings with$1.3 million opening weekend, which is insanely low. Yeah. Now, people are saying it has a lot to do with Sydney Sweeney's American Eagles. Yeah, she's just. No. This movie just looks so stupid. Who said that? The rap. Idiots. So, well, actually what they're saying is that there's more awareness of her American Eagle jeans ad than there is about the movie.

37:47And you would think, like, you know, all press is good press. Everyone's talking about Sydney Sweeney. They might go see her movie. and I feel like it's more so just how stupid this movie is and I respect Sidney Sweeney's like hustle like she really wants to be taken seriously as a serious actress and so this was you know her Margot Robbie moment you know complete transformation you know when Margot Robbie turned into Tanya Harding and Margot Robbie also like produced the movie and it was her production company and I feel like she's doing a lot of similar things to Margot Robbie like very beautiful woman but can be anything can be a chameleon can be a boxer like I don't know why you're doing all that like you're very pretty like people no offense like want to see you just like being beautiful and acting super like super hard just lay and I just don't know why she's doing all this like like taking her teeth out and like getting bloody like why I know it's it's so hard like actors always want to be what they're not it's so true it's like you become so famous for something and all we want you to do it's just like we spoke about with Hilary Duff just make more of the same music that was really awesome I know and it's like that stifles their creative process like we don't give a fuck.

38:48I know. It's really tough. It's like, do you want to feel fulfilled or do you want to make good stuff? So every now and then it pays off. I feel like, you know, recently like low-key very quietly, like for so long Steve Carell was just comedy. Comedy, comedy, comedy, comedy, comedy. And he like very successfully became a serious actor. You know why? Why? Because Steve Carell is unbelievably talented. Yeah. He could do anything. Like too often these non-serious role players try and play serious roles. I haven't seen Sidney Sweeney's serious movie. And maybe I will. Maybe it's good. Harry, you said?

39:23Christy. Christy. Okay. Based on a real story. No, there are a couple of examples of people who have successfully done different things. I'm trying to think. Yeah, I'm saying incredible talent. Robin Williams, incredible talent. Melissa McCarthy, when she dips her toe into serious, she does great. Incredible. But she also knows what she's good at. And I feel like she had an era where she was trying to be taken seriously. She did really good at that movie with Bill... What's his name? De Blasio. No, what is that guy's name? Not Bill Maher. Bill, the old guy. The old comedian guy. Cosby? Murray, thank you.

39:57Murray. That was my next guess. That movie was great. St. Cloud or something. It was like a serious... But she eventually went back to what she does. Yeah. And it's okay to just have a lane. Totally. You know? I totally agree. And I feel like Sidney Sweeney is really trying to do everything. She's the face of a million brands. She's doing rom-com. She's doing scary movies. Now she's doing serious body transformations. And it's like, well, not everybody can be good at everything. I would love to say that she's killing it. Of course. She's putting that aside. Yeah. She's killing it. Separately, she absolutely needs to be in like a James Bond.

40:29Oh, totally. Like where is that part for her? Great call. Right? Yeah. Well, they did just name a new Bond. Yeah, she should be the Bond girl. It would crush. Yeah. I do feel like they're going to give Bond girl to like a young ingenue who's going to be, like this is their first breakout role. Sure. Yeah, so that they can pay her nothing. Yeah, right. But also that's like kind of the Bond thing. They make people out of the Bond series. Or she needs a DiCaprio movie. Her and Leonardo. She needs something like that. Because she's like the most famous woman in the world. Yeah. And a lot of her...

41:01No, her roles are not... Her roles are not good. They're not good roles. Who's her agent? Yeah. Her agent's stinking it up. I think she's really involved in her own career. I think she wants to emulate that of Margot Robbie. Whereas like Margot Robbie was just like a really famous actress. but she ended up becoming like, she's a movie maker. She makes all the movies that she's in. I, Tonya, Barbie. Like she's a director. She's a producer and an actress. She was also though in, what was that movie with Brad Pitt and Leonardo DiCaprio where she had that, that role. Once Upon a Time in Hollywood.

41:29Once Upon a Time in Hollywood. No, no. And also Wolf of Wall Street. Like, yeah. She had those roles. She's on the Oscar level. Sydney's like trying to get there in a really weird way. Yeah. She doesn't, she doesn't have those roles yet and she needs those roles. I have roles. I have roles too. The final story is like some of the best news I've ever heard. what I have roles why are you laughing I have roles too so relatable after the final story is like and it's hard for me to talk about my boyfriend while my husband is here but Robert Pattinson is talking about Twilight he's doing a lot of press because he's in this new movie I think it's called Die My Love with Jennifer Lawrence and they're both talking like she's I don't like think about it this way but she's in like a Twilight she's in Hunger Games and I know that's how she got her start but like I never think about it I'm just not a Hunger Games girl I am But Twilight is like the same level as.

42:16And so they've both been talking on this press tour a lot about their roles. Oh, they're both in the same movie? They're in it together, yeah. Oh my God, I have to see this movie. Yeah, it's not what you think it is. What is it? It's like a turnt movie, I think, about like. Too turnt? No, I actually don't know. I think they have a baby and like it gets weird. I don't know. But I'll see it with you, happily. It's not like, it should have been like a Twilight. No, it's not. It's nothing like that. It's not. Nothing like extraterrestrial or like weird? Okay. But they're doing press and they're both talking about their respective franchises.

42:44And he said he would definitely return to Twilight as Edward Cullen if he was ever offered the role. And there was a prequel movie. Not a prequel. A prequel book. The girl who wrote Twilight just did a prequel. She also did another set of books written from Edward's POV. She keeps turning shit out. So they might make more. And more than a decade after the Twilight saga has ended, fans are once again wondering whether Robert Pattinson would ever return to the role that made him a global heartthrob. He played Edward Cullen. and when asked, he said, oh yeah, definitely. Jennifer Lawrence asked him, they did like that Vanity Fair lie detector test where you ask actors like pressing questions and put them on a lie detector test and the lie detector says if they're lying.

43:21And so Jennifer Lawrence asked him if he would ever be willing to reprise his role and he replied without hesitation, oh, definitely. Lawrence acted surprised. She cautioned him that he probably shouldn't return to Twilight. Pattinson laughed and added, it would be fantastic. I enjoy taking roles from younger actors. I want to be 17 again, which is a hilarious response. Who knew Robert Pattinson was funny? By the way, he could do funny. He is an amazing actor. Agreed. She is an amazing actress. And I know everyone. I would love to watch him go funny, though. I know the toasters are like sick of me.

43:51Like me and Jackie talk about this all the time. Because Twilight is like considered like a lowbrow teen. It's an incredible franchise. Not only is it incredible, it is the best acting, writing, cinematic. I know it. No, no, no. It's not. That's like when people say like One Direction is like shitty pop music. It's some of the best music ever made. Some of. Sure. And Twilight is like an exercise in excellent acting, excellent producing, excellent directing, excellent location scouting, excellent. It is an excellent franchise. Yeah, but you're saying it like it deserves an Oscar. I can think of one better right now.

44:27What? That you refuse to fucking see. No. Oh. Harry Potter is a hundred. By the way, and I love Harry Potter. Harry Potter's. No, it's just as good as Twilight. It's just as good as Twilight. Yeah. Okay. What's better? that you refuse to see. Batman. The trilogy of Batman is by far the greatest trilogy ever made Christian Bale unbelievable. It's okay to be wrong. Unbelievable. No. And by the way, sorry, Pattinson. You were, that was not a good Batman. Actually, that's not your fault. You didn't even see it. I saw it. I saw it on a plane. Well, it was going to be bad if you saw it on a plane. No, but Pattinson was good in it.

45:01It's not his fault. It's like, I don't know why they like to make these like weird superhero movies that are like a little bit mental healthy and dark. It's just like, I don't give a shit. I want to see you fly through the air and beat up bad guys. You're wrong about Twilight. I don't want to see you at the therapist's office. Twilight is some of the best shit ever made. No, I agreed with you. But the Batman trilogy is better. Is Twilight a trilogy? It's a five part. And you've seen them all. Yeah, they went on a little too long. No, there's just one weird one. New Moon. When there's this army of zombies coming.

45:32Yeah, that one wasn't great. With the exception, Twilight 1 and Twilight 4 and 5. are the best shit ever. So Twilight 1 is the best movie because it's the original. And then Twilight 2 is like a good one, but Edward's barely in it because like they break up and it's really fucking annoying. No offense, like we need Edward. Twilight 3 is where they totally lose the plot. Like it's this really nuts thing. 4 and 5, some of the best shit ever made. Dark Knight Rises. No. Heath Ledger. No. Heath Ledger. No. Was unbelievable. I believe it. It's just not as good as Twilight. It's like not even close.

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49:02That's R-H-O-B-A-C-K.com, code TOAST. Today's episode is also brought to you by Weight Watchers, the number one doctor recommended weight loss program. It is the healthy and safe way to lose weight, whether or not you're taking weight loss medication. They have programs that can support any type of weight loss journey. I have used Weight Watchers twice successfully in my life. Once when I wanted to lose weight and another when I wanted to maintain weight. And I'm actually using Weight Watchers now. I'm clearly not in my weight loss era, but I'm really trying not to gain weight. and Weight Watchers has a nursing program because I'm breastfeeding.

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50:54Restrictions apply. Offer ends December 31st. Today's episode is also brought to you by David Protein. And once again, I'm honored to be sitting down with the person who's probably eaten the most David Protein bars in all of America. So introducing David, it is a protein bar packed with 28 grams of protein and just 150 calories. It has zero sugar. So they're giving you everything you need without all the junk. It's 40 % more protein and 57 % fewer calories than the bars you've seen for years. It is the most efficient way of having a portable protein bar. You probably have seen them. They sell them all over New York now, like in every bodega.

51:24It's the gold protein bar. And I have loved protein bars for a while, but sometimes it feels like you're trading off calories for protein. It's like it has a lot of protein, but also like 500 calories. These are fantastic. Sometimes there's not enough protein because there's too few calories. And then sometimes the flavor is just disgusting. They're blueberry. Yeah, Ben likes some of the more quirky flavors. And a recent survey has showed that over 71 % of Americans want to increase their protein intake, cut sugar, and work to reduce calories. and that's why David is just so popular. It really helps keep you full, but without the trade-off for flavor.

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52:22Check out their store locator to find a location near you. All right, Ben, are you ready to help out some swirlies in need? I am. I don't know if you are. And let me tell you, you are so lucky to have me. I really do give such wonderful sound advice. Okay. So lucky to have me. I don't know. I mean, I guess we'll see, right? So lucky. Okay, we get it. I also forgot to pull up to your toaster. Just give me a second.

52:50What song was I singing? You're singing. It's not unusual. I thought you were singing the Dancing with the Stars theme song. No, that one's good. Da-da-da-da-da. Da-da-da-da. Da-da-da-da-da. Okay. Dear Toasters, is this tacky or am I in the wrong? I know I chose this one specifically for you. I was invited to a kid's birthday party and the host has asked volunteers to bring food to the party. Tacky! I'd understand if this was a potluck or like a holiday gathering, but I've never had this request before. This feels extremely icky. I've never heard of this but it's important and I'm sure you get this with Dear Toasters too when we do more on Mail on the Good Guys I'm always craving just a little more context I know but I also tell people to keep it short I know because we don't have time all day to read you know all the history no brevity's key now obviously this is weird and tacky but I just want to say one thing I would like a little bit of context just on this person's situation financially I'd love to understand what kind of year has she had yeah like Is she calling on the community to make something special for her?

53:51For her kid, right? If this was a party for her, I'd be like, oh, that's a little self-indulgent. Like, skip your birthday this year. But your kid deserves a nice party. And so if it takes the community coming together. Correct. I do need more context. Or if this girl's always on vacation and just got veneers, like, fuck her. So I think, yeah, let's take both scenarios. Scenario number one, tacky, where, I don't know, maybe she's like a cheapskate. She just doesn't want to plan anything. She wants people to bring food. That would be terrible. I'm gonna pretend that she's not a cheapskate I'm gonna say she had a tough year she wants the community to come together rally around her child and if that's the case like go above and beyond yeah go bring something lovely I will say this is unheard of like I haven't heard of this but I think if she I don't think the girl would be writing in if this girl like you know everyone knew that she was going through a tough time because everyone would just band together for the kid it also leads to such like a bizarre cuisine assortment you're gonna show up with two boxes of pizza, I'm going to bring chicken masala.

54:49Why would you bring chicken masala to a kid's birthday party? Because chicken masala is delicious. I would go to Baked by Melissa, honestly. Not to force one of our sponsors. All of a sudden, we have pizza, we have Baked by Melissa, we have chicken masala. Okay, pizza and Baked by Melissa goes perfectly, I just want to say. Chicken masala or chicken masala? Okay, you're thinking of... I think it's chicken masala. And I'm thinking of chicken Milanese. Yeah, both would be great. By the way, chicken Milanese is low-key like a chicken nugget. We have chicken masala, we have chicken Milanese, we have pizza, We have Baked by Melissa.

55:13I'm bringing to Spurt Society. Of course, to the kids' party. Yeah. Now, I do want to say, my advice here would just be to do an audit on this girl's social media. A thousand percent. Like, if she's living well, like, Shannon told me the most hilarious story that, like, somebody who literally owes her, like, a business person who owes her$50 ,000. And maybe it was$10 ,000. I can't believe if I'm making it, like, more dramatic than this. I like$50 ,000. Is always going on vacation and just got veneers. And so. That's tough. You need to monitor this person's social media. That's tough. Because if they're living well and their kid is not, like seriously fuck off.

55:42It's tough. But why should the kid suffer? The kid shouldn't suffer. No. He shouldn't. She? We don't know. It doesn't matter. Do an audit of the social media. Yeah. And if the person is going through a hard time, of course. But I don't think that's the case because this girl wouldn't be writing in like shady. So was that the best advice? No, but you didn't give us enough context. Okay. Next up. I have a sister dilemma that I need your help with. My sister has a daughter, my niece. She's 14 years old. She's already going to parties, talking to boys. I always tell my niece that I'm here for her to talk if she needs to.

56:10And finally, for the first time, she opened up to me this weekend about a boy she's talking to. We gossiped a bit. I gave her the adult talk about being safe, not doing anything she's uncomfortable with, and never taking shit from a boy. But I also encouraged her to tell my sister about him. Now I'm in a weird spot because I want to keep my niece's trust, but I also really want to tell my sister. I'm afraid that if I do, my sister will say something and my niece will think that I said something and there won't be space to open up anymore. Do I keep the secret until she's ready to tell her mom or do I spill?

56:35Spill. Oh, I totally disagree. No, you gotta spill. But there's nothing happening, just that she's talking to a boy. Yeah, but like, I don't know. I think you spill. I think you tell the mom. No? Oh, I get, yeah, but the thing is, it's so complicated because you have to tell the mom, like, I'm telling you something, but you literally can't rat me out. Totally. And the mom wouldn't want to rat her out. Why would she rat you out? Because it's a way of getting information. It's an information tunnel. Yeah, but it's also like, I was waiting for her to be like, that, you know, she's something. Like, there's no secret here just that she's talking to a boy.

57:03Like, she's 14. Like, that's what girls do. Totally. but like I don't think that it's the aunt's place to be giving like the the like it wasn't a sex talk but like it was like something it was a safety talk a safety talk yeah I guess that's the mom's job the mom should be having the safety talk no but sometimes a kid won't go to a parent and you just want the kid to have the talk it's like doesn't matter where they're getting the talk the talk needs to be talked sure but like I don't know this is tough it is I do think okay I've rethought the mom needs to know mom needs to know but under the guise of being like you can't fucking rat me out because one we're gonna lose our information highway and two you're gonna make me look like a rat 100 and you can't be obvious either like oh well are you talking to any boys well yeah i just told auntie so now i know that you know yeah no it's she you can't go in then and if the kid finds out it's such a betrayal like sure but then why is she confiding in the aunt the aunt is one degree separated from the mom why would you confide in somebody completely random that has no connection to your mom if you don't want your mom to find out that's because you think you trust the aunt you think you assume that if you're telling the aunt and the aunt says I'm not telling your mom.

58:05I know. But this is important. Okay. If you tell me a secret and tell me not to tell, I'm going to tell my wife. Oh, same. If you tell me a secret and you tell me not to tell, you're telling me knowing I'm telling Jackie. Well, see, but that's the same thing. Yeah. That's the exact scenario. Like someone just told me something so crazy and they were like, don't tell anyone. I was like, okay, but you know I'm telling Jackie. They're like, yeah, of course. But that's the same scenario. A sister told a sister. Right. But it's not about a kid. Kid makes it different. No, it doesn't. It does. I think you're over too.

58:37No, it's different because you have nieces and nephews on my side. You don't have any on your side yet. Sure. So I don't think you can really put yourself in the position, honestly. But like if one of Maddie's kids, God willing, God willing, a million years broke with him, comes to me with a problem, I'm telling Maddie. Right. Yeah. What do you mean right, gaslighter? Wait, what? You've been on the other side of it the whole time. No, I didn't. Yes, you. By the way, I literally was, and then I was like, wait, I changed my mind. Oh, so we're on the same side. We're agreeing. Why are you yelling at me?

59:02Okay, cool. Very good. Good talk. All right, I have 30 final two toasters. Very good. This one's a little freaky. Ooh. Spooky. Spooky. I'm about to turn 30, and I've been saving to freeze my eggs as a birthday gift to myself. After talking with my OBGYN, I learned that freezing embryos is a safer option since they are more likely to survive the thawing process than eggs alone. So she basically wants to get sperm with the eggs like before. Okay. Her dilemma is, would it be crazy to ask my previous friends with Benefit Sky to be my sperm donor? We went to medical school together. We're best friends.

59:30We fell in love and we agreed not to date since we're both moving back to different states after graduation. We left on great terms. We haven't spoken since. He's smart. He's kind. He's handsome. He's stable. And honestly, a perfect candidate. Would it be insane to reach out after all this time to ask? Love ya. Is he single? Good question. If he's married, weird. Agreed. He can't do it. Or if he's even in a relationship, it's inappropriate. He can't do it. But if he's single. What's the worst he could say? No. I don't know. I would 100 % ask if he's single. I was a little on the fence, but once you said he went to medical school, I don't know why.

59:59Like I feel like as a doctor, you'd understand it a little bit. Yeah. Like it's kind of less of an ask. 100%. And the thing is, is you're building a baby. You are. So social weirdness, like literally who gives a fuck? Like we're thinking big picture. We're on to bigger and better things. So the absolute worst thing he could say is no. And then what? He rejected you and you never see or speak to him again because he lives in a different state and you guys never talk. I'm also thinking this is how you guys reconnect. Like you said you fell in love. you're perfect for one another, but you live in different states.

1:00:31Okay, so move. Move. One of you has got to move. Right, no, no. It sounds like either. Here's so many different options here. One, you stalk him. You find out he's married or has a girlfriend. You don't ask and nothing happens. Correct. Two, he's single. You feel like I think that you should ask. And so you do. I would recommend that. Either he says yes. Maybe you have dinner, right? Oh, yeah. You can't just text. You don't text this like, hey, I know we haven't spoken in a while, but do you mind giving you your sperm so that I can make a baby with the two of us? Why don't you ask him to dinner?

1:00:57Yeah, you'd have to fly to town. You rekindle the friendship. Perhaps you get in one last quick penoodle. Oh, maybe you get pregnant the old way. You could. Love that. You could. You could. And if maybe flames aren't aflamin', then at the end you ask, on your way out, by the way, you know, do you mind giving me some of your sperm? I'm looking to create a baby one day. And I would love it to be yours. So, yeah. So, here are your options. Don't ask. He's not married. Don't ask if he's married. Right. Yes. He's married. I'm sorry. He's not married. You go to dinner. Yes. If sparks start flying, try getting pregnant the old-fashioned way.

1:01:33Sparks aren't flying. Ask. Correct. Worst he can say is no. Correct. Three. So either he says yes, you're good. He says no. You go through the traditional channels. The sperm bank is pargy. They do all the work for you. Diseases, college, education, you know, all that stuff. I mean, you pick through, it's like a magazine. Yeah, no. I actually, we were helpful in selecting sperm for the tailors. We were. and they didn't yeah well no that was eggs oh god and they didn't choose who we thought they should but they got pargy sperm they did we of course were rooting for the Jewish guy yeah pargy sperm but they got really pargy athletic sperm they did wow handsome guy too imagine athletic sperm yeah that's good stuff so I give great advice you agree I actually you know what I give great advice yeah I give great advice and you do great podcasts that's it perfect timing thanks darling Ben is that our show that's our show I'm sure you'll be back Ben's now like at a once a week frequency, which we appreciate.

1:02:29Yeah, this has been the Millennial Morning Show. Oh, go for it. Yeah. Comes to you live every Monday through Friday. And you can listen to this podcast everywhere you get your podcast. Watch us on YouTube. Share our clips on Instagram and TikTok. You know, the girls are really firing on TikTok. Mondays, Tuesdays, Wednesdays, Thursdays and Fridays, folks. We will see you next time. Love ya. Bye. Leave a message. Come here. Over here. Love ya. Bye.

1:02:56Thank you.