20VC: Tinder Founder Sean Rad on Lessons Scaling Tinder to the Fastest Growing Consumer Social App in History | Leadership Lessons Scaling Tinder | The Future of Love, Dating and Social Media | The Secret to Your Relationship with Money and Marriage

9 Sep 2024 · 1 h 5 min

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Podcast Summary: 20VC - Sean Rad on Scaling Tinder and Lessons Learned

Episode Overview In this episode of *The Twenty Minute VC*, host Harry Stebbings interviews Sean Rad, the founder and former CEO of Tinder. Sean discusses his experiences scaling Tinder into one of the fastest-growing consumer social apps in history, leadership lessons from his tenure, insights on money and family, and reflections on love and relationships.

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Key Topics Discussed

  1. Lessons in Scaling Tinder
  2. Origins of Tinder: Sean describes the inception of Tinder, inspired by observing social interactions in restaurants where people were more engaged with their phones than with each other.
  3. User Acquisition Strategies:
  4. Initial growth involved using personal networks to promote the app.
  5. A pivotal party at USC was leveraged to force downloads by making Tinder a requirement for entry, which led to viral growth.
  6. Reflections on Decisions:
  7. Sean shares regrets on missed opportunities and mistakes made during Tinder's trajectory.
  1. Leadership Lessons
  2. Product Redesign: Sean emphasizes the importance of annual redesigns to keep the product fresh and relevant.
  3. Detachment from Company Identity: He discusses the challenges of detaching personal identity from the company and how that impacts leadership effectiveness.
  4. Common Founder's Mistakes: Highlights errors early-stage founders often make, emphasizing the significance of maintaining focus on the company’s mission.
  1. Money, Wealth, and Family Office
  2. Personal Relationship with Money: Sean reflects on how his view on money has evolved, emphasizing that true financial freedom is reached at a certain wealth level.
  3. Investment Experiences:
  4. Shares the best (SpaceX) and worst investments, underscoring the importance of team dynamics over mere business ideas.
  5. Setting up a Family Office: Discusses the challenges of managing investments, the need for a disciplined approach, and the learning process involved.
  1. Love, Relationships, and Personal Insights
  2. Changing Nature of Love: Sean discusses how love has evolved over time and shares his thoughts on the loneliness epidemic.
  3. Keys to a Happy Marriage:
  4. Advocates for perseverance in relationships, emphasizing communication and overcoming challenges together.
  5. Spirituality and Death: Reflects on his beliefs regarding spirituality and the significance of life and death in finding meaning.

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Key Takeaways

  • Iterative Process: Sean emphasizes that product-market fit is not a one-time event but a continuous, iterative journey.
  • Focus on Quality: Importance of maintaining a high standard for product quality before launching to a broader audience.
  • Value of Relationships: Highlights that the essence of both business and personal success lies in building meaningful connections.
  • Freedom and Constraints: Discusses how constraints can drive creativity and innovation, contrasting with the belief that more resources always lead to better outcomes.

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Conclusion This episode provides a deep dive into the workings of Tinder, revealing the intricate balance between innovation, leadership, and personal growth. Sean Rad’s experiences offer valuable lessons for entrepreneurs and leaders in any industry, emphasizing the need for focus, adaptability, and the importance of relationships in both business and personal life.

For more insights, watch the full episode on YouTube or visit [20VC's website](http://www.20vc.com).

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Transcript

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0:00Product market fit isn't one moment of time. Product market fit is a constant iterative process. When I was there, we had a rule that every year we had to redesign the entire product because we didn't want people to get bored and stagnant. And we did want to become complacent as a team. Every lesson we learned, the lesson was always focus. Focus on your mission, focus on what you're good at, stop trying to be something and not. Every company needs to continuously fucking relearned. This is 20VC with me Harry Stabbings and what a show we have in store for you today. Sean Rad, founder of Tinder.

0:37The man who has facilitated more love than anyone else in human history. Did you know Tinder has made, check this out, over 50 billion, 50 billion matches. Truly insane. Sean is also the founder of Rad Ventures which has made over 100 investments in both companies and funds. This was such a fun show to do. We recorded one eight years ago or so and so this was very special to do again And you can find the video of the interview on YouTube at 20vc But before we dive in when a promising startup files for an IPO or a venture capital firm loses its marquee partner Being the first to know gives you an advantage and time to plan your strategic response Chances are the information reported it first the information is the trusted source for that important first look at actionable news across technology and finance, driving decisions with breaking stories, proprietary data tools, and a spotlight on industry trends.

1:33With a subscription, you will join an elite community that includes leaders from the top VC firms, CEOs from Fortune 500 companies, and esteemed banking and investment professionals. In addition to mastery journalism in your inbox every day, you'll engage with fellow leaders in the active discussions or in -person ad exclusive events. Learn more and access a special offer for 20 VCs listeners at www .thewformation .com slash deals slash 20 VC. And speaking of incredible products that allows your team to do more, we need to talk about secure frame. Secure frame provides incredible levels of trust to your customers through automation.

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2:49Learn more today at SecureFrame .com, it really is a must. And finally, a company is nothing without its people, and so I want to talk about Cooley, the global law firm built around startups and venture capital. Since forming the first venture fund in Silicon Valley, Cooley has formed more venture capital funds than any other law firm in the world, with 60 plus years working with VCs. They help VCs form and manage funds, make investments and handle the myriad issues that arise through a fund's lifetime. We use them at 20 VC and have loved working with their teams in the US, London and Asia over the last few years.

3:25So to learn more about the number one most active law firm representing VC backed companies going public, head over to Cooley .com and also CooleyGo .com. Cooley's award -winning free legal resource for entrepreneurs. You have now arrived at your destination. Sean, I am so excited for this dude. I've been looking forward to this one for a while, so thank you so much for joining me today, man. My pleasure. Happy to be here. Dude, it's been so long. I want to start with a bit of a kind of tougher one. You tie your identity to your company as a founder, and suddenly it's no longer part of you. How did you deal with that detachment from identity when no longer see your tender?

4:03It's really hard. In my case, I sacrificed so much. Not only it was my identity, it was sort of all I did for a big portion of my life. So when you walk away in one day, that's no longer your identity. It's really, uh, existential, rocking to your core. How did I deal with that? It took me a while to recognize that is not my identity and that is actually not healthy to make that my identity. And founders are better when their company is not then because it's not about it. But it took me a while to sort of step away and see that. And actually reflecting back our most successful moments when we were a little detached and can see the bigger picture beyond the individuals.

4:48And I think it's really important. I mean, a company is a group of people that are on a mission to solve the problem. You need to take the individuals out of it. That's when companies perform the best. When there is sort of, to some extent, an all -for -one, one -for -all mentality, but we are here to accomplish a mission. We are all aligning against that mission. We understand our individual contribution to that mission But we also have the humility to understand that none of us are significant enough or matter enough to success and if we did the met actually problem We haven't built a great organization.

5:23That's greater than us Do you think that's the case for many companies today? No, I look at many companies and I'm like actually they are Individual led in so many respects and if you would have taken some of those great individuals out It's tough. You know, to me, leadership is when you sort of try to abstract yourself away. If things are dependent on you, then you haven't really achieved something. You haven't really been a great leader and given to the next generation, shared your talents and empowered other people. So I think truly great leadership, you know, the greatest CEOs are the ones that are there, always available, killing, pushing the company forward, but are building organizations that if they step away, can run without them.

6:05Because that's when you have a healthy organization. You can't have any individual being a source or single source of success or failure. And you have it matured the organization and that organization will never outlast you. We mentioned that kind of it's a collection of people coming together to achieve a mission. I do want to kind of rewind the clock back. I hear there's some great stories that I have to unpack. I just want to start at the beginning, which is like when we think about the inspiration, We forget today just how revolutionary the swipe was. I might have been on a swipe swipe before this interview, which shows you the importance you have to pay if you want to be successful on dating apps today.

6:43But it was such an innovation. Tell me, what was the inspiration behind Tinder? And when you go back, what did that look like? Before I started Tinder, I just sold a company and was thinking again, what is next reinvention? Around that time, the iPhone had just come out, had been in the market for a few years. And it was really obvious, maybe this was a little early thought at the time that this thing is going to change everything. I saw very early that as much as the phone was connecting us, it was also separating us from the real world. You know, at Sinett restaurants, and I would just like observe, my friends were, you know, heads down in their phone.

7:21It was a weirdest fucking thing. We're all together in a table that everyone's heads down in their phone. And so for me, I was obsessed with this notion of how can the phone actually empower the real world and not take us away from it? So I had this insight one day, just kind of hanging around looking at my friends on their phone at a restaurant. I'm like, how can this phone help me connect with people around me? And I realized there was a group of girls at the table in the restaurant. And I would probably not walk up to one of the girls that I was looking at, because it would be inappropriate in that setting.

7:57I would have to really put myself out there. I run the risk of getting rejected, looking desperate. So I should have wondered, what if I could just tell the phone that I like her? And what if she also would tell the phone that I like her? That she likes me. And if we both like each other, now the ice has been broken and now that fear of rejection is gone, now we can connect. That what we call the double opt -in was the revolutionary thought behind Tinder. Every system of connection prior to that was riddled with this emotional, angst, and barriers to connection. Do you remember when you released it?

8:31Do you remember when you pressed go live? Yes. What does it look like from that? Does he just go skyrocket from the moment you start? No, no. So when we released it, nothing happens. There's no one knew about it. It's a very anti -comactic moment. But what we started doing at a certain point, sitting with the team, and it's like, I mean, we built this great product. We know there's something special here with what the fuck do we do. And I think as an entrepreneur, you serve after like work with the resources that are around you to make the most of what you have. And for us, it's like, we all had friends.

9:04So it's like, all right, let's just start there. Everyone take out your phone, text, 300 friends. And I think the thing that we texted was, download this app and think me later. Sir, wanted to create this like, FOMO mysteriousness. And I think in total, we texted 500 people over the course of a few days, we had, I think it was like 700 signups. I started looking at it seemed like, did anyone text anyone else? Like, where did this additional come from? And we realized that it started going viral amongst our close group of friends. And then when we started to see which was sort of confirmation of the thesis that we had, that we could uncover connections that would have never existed.

9:46We removed these barriers. We started hearing that friends who already knew each other, we're now getting together. So I would have friends calling me like, oh, I never, you know, I shit. I never knew she liked me. We never put two and two together, I'm going on a date with Sohan Cell. And it's like, whoa, we've been in the same friend circles for years, but neither of you expressed that interest. So, you know, is that like confirmation, like, okay, this thesis that we have, that we're walking about our lives, not maximizing the potential of our relationships, is true and it was working. That was the initial spark.

10:22So we have 700 people in. We have the initial spark and we start to see that outgrow from the core. What happens then? Tinder was a relatively complicated product to market because it is very much location specific. And your building network effects, right? So the strength of the network, you don't want random people just sort of downloading that app and never opening it again. So you need a sort of strong connection amongst the network. So we kept thinking like what are what are areas where groups of friends or similar people sort of gather and congregate and one of those are parties and an intern of ours was in college at the time and his friend who was sort of like one of the most popular people at USC was having a big birthday party.

11:09You know, I think it was like a thousand people were invited to this party. So we told her, we'll pay for the party. We'll throw the party, but in exchange under one condition, you have to do it at another location. So we shut all the students to another location where we had a bigger venue and we can invite more people. But the other condition was that no one gets into the door unless they have Tinder on their phone. So we literally had bouncers at the door, you know, whether you're a fighter or not anyone can come in, but you need to have Tinder installed on your phone. Now, no one even knew what Tinder was, but the next day everyone woke up and saw the people that they saw at the party confirming this thesis.

11:48It's like maybe there was that girl or guy that I didn't have the courage to walk up to. Now I see them in the app and now I can swipe right and now we're matching. Bringing people together and then empowering them through the app was a great marketing strategy and that worked. Once we did that party at USC over the coming days, it went viral on campus. Everyone was talking about it, everyone was sharing it, and we realized that was a great mechanism of when we introduced Tinder to the right groups of people, it takes a mind of the time. But I can't stress enough though that none of that would have mattered if we didn't build a great product.

12:24Marketing's important. This is another thing people sort of miss. They think like, all right, I need to figure out how to get it out there, but they don't spend enough time focusing on whether or not they have the right thing to promote. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. Let's just delve into that then. It's on the product for the first part we do distribution. You know, a generation has been told about the lean startup. Just ship, get it out there, see what works. A lot of other people say no actually. You need to be a lot more of a crafts person and really build a great product experience and be very deliberate about it.

12:55Which side of the fence do you sit on? First of all, you got to be very clear about the problem that you were saw. And I think you have to feel as a founder, a connection to that problem. Have to be the customer. Because I think products are incubated and grow in phases and phase one is that you're using it and the team is using it and that you have product team fit. And then I think once you cross that boundary, then I think you could go to like product friends fit. And then I think once you cross that boundary and it's working amongst your friends or network of close customers, then I think you slowly start expanding it.

13:33But the idea of throwing shit at the wall and seeing what sticks is a very soulless, you know, I don't subscribe to it. I think you have to have a clear vision test, iterate the vision, and don't put the cart before the horse. If it's not ready for a million people, you don't want to give it to a million people. You want to slowly start expanding your circle of reach and test in every step. So product market fit isn't one moment in time. Product work at fit is a constant iterative process because as the product grows, it sort of faces new challenges at scale. And just because it worked with a thousand people doesn't work mean or work with a million.

14:15The idea of MVP, one thing people really miss in MVP, yes, you want to launch and get feedback, but if you launch a shitty product, what's the point? So I think there is a bar of quality that you still have to hit before that product is ready for people to play with. And if you haven't achieved that, then whatever data you're getting is corrupted data to begin with. And another thing I'll say, we always believe in this, you know, Tinder, we always believe we have one shot. There isn't a second chance with users. We have one shot to impress them. So we have to make that one shot count. And we would not take that shot until we're very ready.

14:52The sort of lean start up, throw shit against the wall, I think lacks a little bit of salt. The one short wow, is that for you match? Is that for you surfacing a girl that someone finds pretty? Is that for you surfacing a friend? What was the wow moment that you craved and covered it in those early days? It was 100 % about connecting you with someone and you walking away with meaningful experience. I think product marketing is such an important skill and I always say to founders, be as narrow as possible because you want to find your 1000 true fans. You want to find those people that go, yes, that's me.

15:29And I worry that - Nero with the problem yourself, but maybe you do yourself of the service if you're too narrow in the audience there, sir, because that problem that you're solving can speak to many audiences. So for us, the problem we were solving was to make a new connection. Everyone felt at that time, I think even more so now a little isolated, they wanted new connections, they wanted to meet someone for whatever reason. Marriage, friendship, whatever. We actually had a rule. You were not allowed to say dating a tender. You were not allowed to call tender a dating app. You're not allowed to say marriage because we weren't about that.

16:04We were about an introduction. We were about connecting you with someone for any reason. We're sort of marketing message that we would always repeat is find out who likes, is that phoma? Who likes me that I don't know about? So that was the hook. The reason you would come in is because I'm curious who likes me. The reason you would stay is because you made a new connection that was valuable, that was meaningful, for whatever purpose, for whatever intent to you. How did you define a retained user? You know, at Facebook, they said, like, off to five friends have been added. We count not as like a retained and activated user.

16:38How do you count a retained user? The thing that we really focused on is how many conversations We could drive. So you know, they're swipe, match, talk. The ultimate value proposition is that you're in a dialogue. So the number of you look conversations we were driving was one of the metrics we would look at a lot. We did look at retention in the sense of what was Dow to Mao, Mao to, you know, Mao to Mao. But over time those metrics became less important. The metrics that became more important were conversations, matches, sort of us delivering value, the metrics that measure true value and revenue, which is your desire to compensate us for that value.

17:26Retention on its own, it is a problematic metric that could lead sometimes if you're not careful to a lot more harm than it can go. How so? Because I think when you're focused on retention and you believe that retention equals value, you can sometimes dilute yourself. Me spending hours doing something doesn't mean I extracted true value. I could spend hours getting high, doesn't mean that's valuable in my life. So drugs have a great retention and they're really good at retaining people, but are they actually driving meaningful value? I would argue that. Facebook and social media is really good at retaining users and almost against your free will and hacking your desires and keeping you there.

18:16And they do that because they make money through advertising and the more time they have with you, the more ads they can put in front of you. But is that truly enriching my life? Is that truly creating value? Or can you look at that and say, well, that's actually distracting me from a lot of other shit that is more meaningful and more valuable. So we were always very careful like there was many times a desire to look at retention as sort of the end all be all metric And by the way, we have fucking phenomenal retention. We had Retentive powers beyond social media platforms But what you were doing on Tinder I always thought was 10 times more meaningful than kicking back and you know watching content You were actually connecting with human beings.

19:00And I think to me all we have is connections. All the other shit is just noise. All we want is to experience love with other human beings. Remember I told you as things scale, right? New problems for. They take a new shape. If I was still at Tinder and in fact while I was there this this was sort of a metric of success I always drove home for the team is that retention and the number of connections isn't as important as the quality of connections. So the natural course of Tinder, I always saw, is actually we're moving to a world of no -sweeping. Where Tinder is so smart that I could just say, Harry, I have the person for you.

19:40And why don't you focus on that? And if I was wrong, great, I'm happy to introduce you to someone else. Technology becomes, I think, the better it gets, the more human it gets. And to me, the ultimate archetype was the matchmaker. Could we achieve the success of the human brain matchmaker who was able to say, Harry, here's the girl for you. Again, I'm not going to judge what you want to do. You know, I'm just going to introduce you guys. You can do whatever you want. Once the core team left, I think that promised, that mission was maybe replaced with a desire for retention, a desire for revenue, the sort of intention of why we created that company, what we were trying to do.

20:20Sheve got lost. So over time, the quality of the product to keep, because no one's actually sitting there and saying, how do we scale the impact of the product? Everyone's saying, how do we scale the metrics of the product? Is that inevitable? These are businesses with costs. They have to post quarterly numbers. I agree with you totally, and you feel it in the product. The products today, as we said earlier, and as you pay, they're pretty horrible. And you hit pay walls. I mean, that's just barbed products and as you pay. And then when you pay, it opens up. But, is that just inevitable? Look, you could make the argument that everything dies.

21:00It's just a question of when. Companies are organisms, just like humans. Humans die, companies die, and it's just a question of how long? And what is the long journey? And I think if you don't keep disrupting, and you don't keep setting the bar higher and higher and higher, you will achieve complacency. In complacency, which is a lot of big companies die by complacency. You have teams who don't care. You have politics. You lose sight of why you are there. It's every person for themselves. Or you're not intellectually honest and you're not forcing yourself to disrupt yourself and re -enquestion the mission and improve it.

21:42So I wouldn't say it's inevitable. I think we've had organizations that have outlasted my lifetime, your lifetime. Maybe they'll outlast my kids lifetime. So nothing's inevitable. But yes, I think everything has a natural decay or a conclusion. The question is, what? Nothing's forever, that's for sure. Before we talk about nothing's forever, which I have to touch on, because you said that in a kind of wonderfully calm and cavalier manner. How do you feel about founder like companies being so central to the enduring success? This is something that we had, Daly and I found as fun really you legitimize on in terms of the importance of it and many do, but others say no.

22:22How do you feel about it has to be found? To me, founders are really good at keeping and reiterating the mission because they care the most. Sometimes, you know, founder market fit, team market fit is essential. when it is your personal story, which it often is for founders, it's another level of storytelling. And it doesn't mean that the founders are the best person to execute it. I actually think great founders put the company before themselves and are intellectually honest and self -aware enough to say, hey, you know what, maybe I've taken it to this point and there's someone else better than me to take it to the next point.

23:01I don't believe that a founder is forever. I think the founder energy is required for success and I think over time you can have different sounders You have people who can come into an organization with a new age a better vision and I think you would call them a founder You can and I hope I'm not being too spicy here But I also heard that when you were not in the role of CEO at a point your exact team came and said well if he's not in the role of CEO We're leaving thing. Which is quite a jar of your position for anyone to be in. Can you just take me to that? What happened? So there was a moment in time where I think Tinder was growing so fast.

23:47When you say growing so fast, like, what was that? Like users, like, we're sort of scaling. New germs revenue. We used to play this game where we would chart the growth rate and figure out how fast we would get to billion users if we held the growth rate. If you charted the growth rate we experienced in the at a certain moment in the first year, we would have reached a billion users in three months. That's how fast we were growing. Now obviously we didn't sustain that growth rate, but the product was growing fast, the organization was growing fast, revenue was growing fast. We were growing so fast that we couldn't even solve problems with humans because we couldn't higher humans fast enough.

24:26We had to get creative at all. But at a certain point, I felt like I need help. I feel like I wanted my share of Samber. I wanted my partner who can help me scale the organization while I focus on product and technology. So we brought in very, very experienced person. And I think the board sort of, he was ran a public company, very experienced. And the board sort of felt like, well, Sean, maybe we should give that person the CEO title because they would carry more authority. And then you do the same thing you're doing but take president title and I was like, okay, fine with me. But when I stepped out of those other functions where I kind of stopped being in the room for a lot of those other functions, it created a lot of issues in the organization.

25:10And at one point, yeah, I don't know if this is about me or maybe the other person wasn't that good. But at one point, there was like mutiny. We had the entire executive team. I don't talk about it, but since you know the story, I'll say, I don't know how you sound now, President. We try not to talk about this, but there was one point where the entire executive team unbeknownst to me Went to the board and basically said if Sean doesn't come back in the CEO role, we're all quitting I found that very flattering. I think definitely like a crazy moment for me personally The translation what I took away was that the team was saying that Product and engineering isn't everything the other parts of the organization equally In fact, every part of the organization equally matters.

25:56And maybe it was a mistake on my part to say, I'm gonna maybe play favorites and spend, give a little more love to this part of the organization and as a leader, outsource another part of the organization. And I think the truth is that the learning that I had is everything matters equally. You know, unfortunately, the team didn't come tell me that. It sort of just threw up their hand inside. Come back or we quit. But I have to ask, I was thinking this ever since you said it, but I so agree with you when you said about product market fit comes in kind of chapters. When you look back on the different chapters, which was the hardest one?

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26:33Was it international expansion, new city? If so, what city, what country was it, new product? If so, what product? What segment was the hardest in unlocking the next? Yeah, so international expansion was one of the hardest things because, first of all, building a global organization is not these. Building a global team and making people in another country feel like they are a part of the team, even though the executive team isn't there, sitting with them, that's not an easy thing. But it was particularly difficult around the Tinder product because in the beginning, in the early days, we thought localization meant that the language of the app had to adapt to the language of the user.

27:15But localization is much more early Because particularly around social human connection and relationships, there are cultural differences in everywhere in the world which means the product had to adapt to meet those cultural differences, which means tinder was slightly different as a product in every country which means we had many product organizations servicing the same core product. What was the strangest product alteration that you had to make? I'll give you two stories. In Korea, group dating, that's like the socially accepted norm. It's actually very rare that I would go out one on one. It's usually friends or double dates.

28:00Like we're going out as a group. So group dating was a huge thing. Which like, so we had to like really think about that experience. Like reorient tender as a group dating. Not as an individual dating. But then what was interesting is we, as we reorient that it got us thinking like, like, well, could that be a thing everywhere else? Maybe that's actually more effective means of connecting. So can we bring group dating? Can we make that a thing? Can we make that easy? I mean, naturally a lot of times we go out with our friends, you know, but, you know, we did really double date until it's later into the relationship.

28:33So that was one thing that was interesting to tackle. Another thing was that in India, it was not really a system of dating and marriage that was very much curated by your parents. Your parents decide. And I think that was a moment in time where we were like, Hey, we could adapt the product to that, but actually no. We're not going to because we believed in empowerment and we believed that you should be in control of your own fate when it comes to law. So that was actually sort of a moment where we're like, no, we're not changing the product. Even if it means we're going to have less users, because it was socially less acceptable.

29:15So it's like unique things like that, where it's like, wow, the social norms and the dynamics are just completely different. Okay, in hyperscaling, you have so many decisions coming at you so fast. What did you do that you wish you hadn't done? I'll give you two lessons there. I would say the Tinder team was is maniacally good about focus and prioritizing and saying, no, and keeping the product simple. Well, we believed in simplicity. I think if you look at the tender product, it's very simple. I would always reiterate the Albert Einstein quote, which is like, if something isn't simple enough, it's because you don't understand it enough.

29:55The more you get an essence of something, the simpler it actually becomes. And it's like, fools make things more complex. So prioritizing and picking our battles was very critical. That became a little harder as we scaled. In the early days, we were very much one team, all building towards one product. Everyone was involved in one release. We all knew what everyone was doing. Even by the time we were like 100 people, that was still the case. And then there's a certain point once we expanded, you had to sort of divide and conquer. and you had more capabilities and you had more teams. So you wanted to feed them with projects, so you lowered your bar of what you would do.

30:37And then I think the clarity and focus started to dwindle and then we had to figure out how can we divide and conquer but all map towards one cohesive vision, which became the next challenge. We had an environment where we really wanted to give people freedom to execute. like I heated the top down bureaucratic approach to creation. Now I can come to the company and say, here's my vision, here's where I think we should go, but I'm not gonna solve it. Everyone sort of bottoms up, come up with solutions and take ownership. So we really wanted to instill that bottoms up. Everyone has a voice. The best ideas will win mere, mere credit culture.

31:20And then sometimes the bigger you get, that could lead to a little bit of drift and people doing things that maybe they shouldn't be doing, or they have nowhere the company has no business doing, as you scale, you have to build new systems to protect against drift. All this is a thing that didn't work biggest and what did you learn from it? In the early days, very few people know this, but we had every user sort of got to point where they had a lot of matches, where it was almost like you would open the app and you're like, I don't wanna meet someone new, I need to make sense of all the people who already wanna connect with me.

31:53So we started shifting our focus to like post -match. What we wanted to do is create more moments where you could get to know your matches and find opportunities for connection. So we created this product called Moments, which was sort of Instagram Stories before Instagram Stories. You could share a moment like something you're doing in the real world and it was an expiring 24 hour moment and people could reply to it and your matches could be like, oh, you know, great. And we all love the product so much. that we were like, you know what? Maybe this could be for friends. Maybe we let Tinder be more than just romantic connections.

32:32Maybe you can add your friends and you can share moments with your friends. So we started, we started to try to shift from a dating product to a social network and we very quickly learned we have no business to me. Our brand, our mission, our thesis is very much about creating new connections, introducing here someone new, we worked in the business of connecting you with your friends. And our users did a one. At some point we also said, hey, let's create an app to help you make friends. And we very quickly learned that no one wants to open an app to make friends, like that's a very desperate, weird experience.

33:14And then we said, well, could we apply Tinder's mechanism to business connections? And then we quickly learned, well, no one wants to swipe and match and make new business connections. And so that was a real realization actually that that wasn't what people came to for. Yeah, it was a reminder, I think, the more we scaled, the lessen was always focus. Focus on your mission. Focus on what you're good at. Stop trying to be something you're not. Every company needs to continuously fucking relearn. It's like even when Steve Jobs left Apple and he came back, what did he do? He killed a bunch of products because he said we have no business doing these other products.

33:54This isn't in the DNA and the soul of the company. So I think when you get bigger and you have more money and you have more resources, you fall in this trap of, oh, we could do more things. But you have to stop and ask yourself just because we can. Do we have any business doing those things? Does that map to our core competencies? Is that why the thousands of employees we have actually joined this company? And if you're going to change that vision, there better be a very good reason. And it's got to be bottoms up. It's got to be start with because your users aren't asking for that. None of our users ask for a friend -making app or a business -making app.

34:30How effective was paid in the early days? I'm just thinking about what you said there on constraints. If you don't have the constraints, you've got to spend a lot of money on paid. It was highly effective. Our perspective on paid features was the only reason we would charge you is if charging you for that feature made the ecosystem bet. Meaning, if we gave that capability to free to everyone, it would actually dilute the quality of the ecosystem. The first feature we launched that really started making a lot of money was the super like. So we wanted to have this signal that you're not just someone I swiped for up the right right on your extra special.

35:12It's sort of like in the real world, I can walk up to someone and say, hey, what's up? Or I can walk up to someone and maybe this might not be a good idea and say, you know what? I feel the strong connection. I really like you. There was sort of like the next level of romance. That was what the super like was. But if we actually gave it to free, it would have no value. So we gave one free to everyone and then we charged if you wanted to super like again. What the one free did is it took away the desperation. So someone didn't know, did I use my one free on you or did I actually spend money to get your attention?

35:47Which could make me look desperate. So it gave me the sort of excuse like the out, but then I can spend money to buy more super likes and super like we're often. But again, charging for that not only allowed us to build better products, it created more revenue, allowed us to fulfill our mission, and built the business, but it also made the product better because it created a new feature where it made sense for us to church. The free is smart because it removes the desperation. The hard thing is you don't want to be like, you paid Fred and it's too desperate. I am intrigued. You said about kind of the curation on liking.

36:22How do you feel about the league, which takes it to the extreme, which has like three per day, and that's all you're gonna get? Look, I don't subscribe to anything that's elitist. I think in many ways a lot of these dating apps are elitist. Living in a world where one person or one group is better than another. Bumble is elitist. Why, you know, women go first, women have all the control. Why? I'm actually not even sure that's good for women. It was always a weird concept. I'm like, what? It was a good marketing gimmick, but I don't think it actually ever made sense. And then, you know, the least perspective is, you know, you have to be, you know, some educated, highly educated, or Raya's perspective is you have to be cool and rich.

37:10Like, fuck that. Tinder was always, you're yourself, we're gonna find and match you with people who love you for you. And everyone deserves love and everyone deserves a match. We wanted to solve core human issues. We didn't want to give a leg up to one group or another group. Are you proud of the Tinder product today? I haven't been there in a long time, so would I look at the product and say, I'm proud of the existing iteration of the product? I think I look at the product now and say, fuck, like all the missed opportunity, because when the core team, when I left, and then others left, there was a lot of unfinished business.

37:49We had a roadmap that I would say was like 10 years long. We knew once we achieved this, it's going to open opportunity to this, it's going to open opportunities to this. So I think I would look at the product right now and I would say, it looks the same as when I left. That makes me sad because when I was there, when the team was there, actually we had a rule that every year we had to redesign the entire product. That was a rule. We would redesign the entire experience every year because we didn't want people to get bored and stagnant and we didn't want to become complacent as a team. So we would have to have one major redesign every year which then forced us to reimagine all the futures And I think it was a brilliant exercise because it kept taking it to the next level the energy the passion Maybe isn't as strong as it was in the early days, but that's also again natural course of business as you scale Do you agree with Whitney's take that we're gonna have essentially a eyes talk to each other go alas, see if you like me and I like you, AI.

38:52And then we both like tennis for a match. Is that how we'll have like a virtual dating self? That is a very sad idea. The journey is part of the reward. Me actually talking to someone, getting to know them, helps me learn about myself, helps me learn about them. It's not about a transaction. Romance is a journey. It's not just an end to a means. I think abstracting away the journey is a stupidest idea I've ever heard. And you learn a lot about that journey and look, it's like addiction is when something is too easy, when you get a free dopamine hit without doing a lot of work and you actually feel worse about yourself.

39:34When you have to work for something, the world war is even greater. I didn't have money when I grew up and I read on the tin that when you got money you would be happy. I got a little bit of money, no, why did it as much as you did for Tinder? But I wasn't very happy. And it was a very awkward time of like, shit, if the thing I've always been chasing isn't actually the thing that I was promised it was. What do I do now? How do you reflect on your relationship to money? Number one, you said it. Money does not buy you happiness. I mean, up to a certain point, you want freedom. Money brings you freedom.

40:12freedom does enable happiness. But after a certain point, it doesn't make you happier. If you're not careful, it could actually complicate your life a lot more. You can accumulate more shit. It could change your relationships. What stage does it complicate? Because at some stage you have to have a family office. And then you have to be able to manage your family office. And then taxes become a complete nightmare. And all of this becomes change. For me, and it took me a while to see this, but I live a life that is much less than I can afford to live because I don't want change, I don't want stuff, I don't value those things.

40:55I don't care about a yacht. My friends are my childhood friends. Building, creating products, solving problems is what makes me happy. And I think there's a lot of other things when you have a lot of freedom, you can kind of get crushed by the paradox of choice and possibilities. When I achieve that freedom, it was also very hard because what do you do when at least financially and to some extent as entrepreneurs can kind of do anything? So it's sort of a harder problem, harder to find meaning when you're living in a world of ineffited possibilities. And I actually think that's why globally there is a little bit of a crisis of meaning because we're out of moment in history where regardless of your wealth by any means we are all way wealthier and have access to way more resources than previous generations.

41:48Which also has expanded the options and possibilities and who we can be cut. Do you think that's actually the case? So I don't mean to be provocative, but you know, when we look at the price of food today, when we look at the increasing homelessness, when we look at the increasing levels of drug addiction, does not feel like the standard of living is getting much better? Yeah, we can get. No, I didn't say the standard of living is getting better. I said our access to resources are getting better. The more abundance we have, if we're not careful, can actually impact our quality of life. Because more choice isn't necessarily better.

42:27It's like when you show up to the restaurant and you have a book this big of Items it's not easier to make your choice of what you want to order than if if it's just one page of something that's highly cure You know in a world where more than ever any time in history you can get on YouTube and learn anything You can become anything We're more free than any generation. We have more possibility than any generation I think it also becomes harder to identify who you are, what you want, and meaning in your life. And I think at a different scale, success sort of created that same challenge. My whole life was building companies, trying to make money, getting to the point that I wanted to be.

43:06And then when I got there, I was kind of like, okay, now what? Who am I? What do I do with my time? And I could do anything with my time. So what is meaning? And that requires you to look inward and really self -explanatory. or you can look outward and replace it with a bunch of noise and shit that actually distracts you from answering that question meaning. In a sense, that's why I say, you know, kind of getting what you want can create the next challenge. Life is a journey of challenges. There's never, you're never going to get to the end of the road. Yeah, I think I'll just buy the big assy.

43:38Much, much better. You'll buy the Bugatti, you'll enjoy it for two weeks, and then you'll get over. I won't actually, because I'm legally in order. I'm not allowed to drive Sean, so I'd have to sit in it stationary, but I wouldn't enjoy it. So then you decide, okay, I'm going to do a family office and I'm going to invest a lot more work, a lot more hands -on with many more companies. Why? Why not do another company? You said you had a tiny... I've done both. So I have a family office where we've invested in over 100 different companies and funds. And I enjoy that because it allows me to meet other great entrepreneurs to give back, to mentor, to learn myself.

44:20But at heart, I'm a builder, I'm a problem sol. That's what gets me up in the morning. I don't talk about it, because I've started four companies since Tinder, but I just kind of purposely, I think I kind of learn, like it's a little easier to build without a lot of attention. Post -success, do you have a lot more leverage? Anyone who has accumulated experience and wealth also accumulates freedom in my fridge. No matter what stage. So of course I would say I have more options. I can think bigger and so you have a CEO for each business Yes, that runs day to day and then you finance and do strategy with them.

44:57Yes I think it's really rewarding position to be in because I can focus on strategy and trust others to run the business Doesn't mean that I don't come in and get detailed and help in the areas where maybe I'm the best person to do something but I've found a lot of meaning in building. So I'm not gonna stop building. What were the biggest lessons you had in setting up the family office? Investing is hard. And it's a whole life job. Investing requires a lot of discipline. It requires you to really experiment, understand what works for you. You know, at a certain point, you have to build an organization.

45:37It's like building a company. Carries all the challenges of building a company. You have to have a vision, a thesis, you make mistakes and learn, you iterate, you become better over time. So, you know, the family office is no different than building a company. We're just in the business of investing. Did you have a clear strategy from day one? I'm going to put 25 % in directs, 25 % in funds, 25 % in cash, 25 % in property. I had a high level vision, but I was also, I iterated the more I learned. What did you start with and what did it change to? Most of what the family office does is we invest a lot in real estate, because I think real estate is an amazing asset class.

46:20We invest a lot in venture. That's direct or through funds. And we invest a lot in public equities. We invest a lot in credit and debt. There's different things. And then there's a lot of things we don't... There's a lot of things that we don't do either, because I don't feel like we understand it enough. We're not good at it. You know, for me, it's really focusing on the areas where we can add a value where we have an edge and you know Who knows it morphe's you know, his new opportunities present itself We're optimistic but for the most part it really is following Passion and love and the things that I enjoy working on and I want to work on and I want to spend time on and Eliminating distractions as much as possible.

47:04Well, it's been the single -bast investment and probably SpaceX. You've asked that a lot in SpaceX very, very early. That'll do it. The thesis there was actually very simple. I was, I admire Elon. I think he's a once in a lifetime entrepreneur. I was just willing to let him investment. What was the worst investment and lessons from it? If you don't want to say what it actually was, by all means. But what were the lessons from it? The worst investments were... I chased the idea and not the team. So there were moments where I'm like, fuck, this idea is so good. I'm not really sure about the team.

47:43Like do they have the passion, the energy to go and execute? Is their heart really in it? And I kind of ignore those elements, because I'm like, oh, my idea is so good. I don't wanna miss out. And nine times out of 10, never works. So the number one thing is team and passion. I think you want a team that their heart and soul Is in it like you have a founder market fit. They are building the product for themselves. They are the customer, they understand it. It's coming out of some personal problem or experience. So they won't give up when times get tough. They'll power through, they'll iterate.

48:20They're law of teams that are humble, self -aware, are able to recognize when they made a mistake and adapt versus constantly make excuses. This didn't work out. Let's blame the market. Let's blame the circumstances rather than let's look at it. Will you invest in someone you don't like? Not anymore. Why not anymore? Because it never works out. I think I have the luxury, the gift of being able to work with people that I really enjoy working with. And again, that's what life is about. It's about relationships. The money doesn't matter if you don't have great friendships, relationships, partnerships, and loves it in what you're doing.

49:00It's like love is the energy that I think produces the best outcomes and the greatest results. Good segue, thank you for that. That's very nice to you, team me up perfectly because I think you literally must have facilitated more love in the world than anyone else in human history. 50 billion matches, according to your Twitter bio. My question to you is, you have an incredible relationship with your other half. What are the most non -obvious secrets, pieces of advice on how to have a thriving relationship. No, no, obvious. It is very, very hard. Relationships, I think, for you, when they're good, to become better as a person.

49:41But in order to become better, you've got to stick through the hard times. Not give up. Do you think we give up too easily today? I think because we have more options than we have had in any moment in history, that increasingly we have the ability to switch and give up. You go back in some moment of time, it's like you were in a tiny little village. If you're lucky, there was one person that you loved and cutting bait. I mean, where are we really gonna go? You've had to stick through it. Now, you could quit and you could say, okay, I'm gonna treat this for something better. But I think the reality is, every relationship comes with challenges.

50:21It's just a question of which challenges. Once you stick through all the hard moments and you keep getting better and elevating, and then you look back and it's like with my wife, it's just like what we said about companies. Like all those challenges made us better. They brought us close or stronger as a result. We're more resilient. The other day, I got into a little thing with my wife. She had this moment, she's like, oh, like, is this gonna always be a problem? I didn't, you know, are we gonna get through this? And I kind of looked at him like, Babe, we've been through. We've overcome all these challenges.

50:55So the answer is yes. I mean, if this is like, you know, we've overcome every other challenge, every other moment where it's been like, oh, this is so hard, we've prevailed and we've become better. So this is no different. When you have the mindset that every challenge is working for you and is bringing you closer, that's when you grow. You can't grow without challenges. You know, that's the thing of life. I mean, if it was all rainbows and butterflies, what's the point? Sacks, honesty, trust, and laughter. The four pillars, sex, honesty, trust, and laughter. I think that's a good formula. Yeah, where would you put one through four?

51:32Sacks, honesty, trust. To me, it's like one thing leads to another. When you have honesty, you have trust. When you have trust, you have laughter. When you have laughter, you have sex. I wish. I made lots of girls laugh. There's one thing I want to discuss before we do a quick fire. And it's you said kind of cavalierly almost that things end. It almost seemed quite natural. A question that I have for you is, how do you think about your own spirituality? How do you think about dying? Just talk to me about that. I think it's quite an important one. Well, I don't believe I'm going to get really spiritual with you.

52:12I don't believe our soul dies. I think our soul carries on and our soul through many lifetimes, including what we leave behind in the memories. We're sort of always contributing and always growing and always facing new challenges of elevating and maybe a soul level. But our body dies, our presence on this earth dies. But I think our soul dies. You scared of that. No, you can't have lights without darkness and you can't have life without death. If you would never die, and that means you're never willing to die for something, and that means you don't have a life of meaning. And if you never have darkness, that means you're never overcoming anything and you're never risking, and you have a very bland, monotone existence.

53:07is dying for something the ultimate form of meaning. Standing for something and willing to take risks for what you believe in, and really love, I think the energy of that is love, right? So love is what makes me overcome obstacles, what makes me stick through. That to me is a meaning for me. What was the hardest thing to stick through? Building a company is not easy. you have moments when you're getting crushed. Any entrepreneur knows this. When you're losing it. You don't have a nae underpound gorilla come into the room and that's Benji. People tried, but money doesn't solve, money doesn't create innovation.

53:49If money resulted in innovation, then you would never have disruption. I think so, it's like just because you have more money, does mean you can beat us. Because this is mean you're the most creative. In fact, I would actually say sometimes constraints This force creativity forces you to focus, forces you to prioritize. When your resource constraints, you automatically don't do the shit you shouldn't be doing, you're forced to make a decision with your time, with your money. So I don't think necessarily more money. In fact, there's many startups that actually failed because they raised too much money.

54:23And they threw money at the problem, and they threw people at the problem, and they didn't actually tussle or force themselves to think out of the box or get creative and find new ways to solve a problem. So I don't think more money necessarily solves problems. I agree with that completely. I think it also makes for problems in relationships. Did making a lot of money change the dynamic of your relationship? I'm fortunate enough that I was able to navigate all of that to kind of... Did you take money out the way through Tinder? I didn't mean that too invasive. A little. A little bit. We took a notion, I'm a big believer in this, that take a little bit along the way to live and be comfortable.

55:02I think the more you can create freedom, the more you can give to what matters, which is your company or your relationships, and sometimes money buys that freedom, and it allows you to focus even more. So we did take money along the way and our investors wanted us to do that because I think they realized that That if we alleviated some of that pressure then we can go even harder But we didn't take too much. Sorry. I'm being specific, but a lot of founders go like I didn't get it Like is 5 million in secondary for a founded too much would you say whoa Harry? I think I think it's a better way to think about it in terms of percentages is Is 5 million too much if you're having a billion dollar company?

55:45No, it's 5 million too much if your company is worth 20 million and someone you know That's a different scenario What do people not understand about wealth that they should do? China one so for first of all wealth does not bring you happiness Meaning brings you happiness wealth can create meaning up to some point Or it could give you freedom to sort of create meaning up to some points but wealth on its own, does not bring happiness. And I think the other thing people don't ask enough is what is wealth? If I have great relationships in my life, I have a job that I absolutely love. I feel like I'm making a contribution to those around me.

56:24I'm living the life of meaning and purpose in my wealthy, even if I don't have a lot in my bank account, I would say, yeah, you're wealthy. I think people also have to question what is wealth? Is wealth the Bugatti? Is wealth the yacht? But if the person sitting in the yacht has cancerous relationships is secretly really lonely and isolated and has a lot of noise and has no freedom and no time to be thoughtful, then is that well? I get to watch you all day, but I do want to do a quick fire round. So I'm going to give you a shot. Okay. So what do you believe that most around you disbelieve? That America is the greatest country in the history of all countries.

57:02Do you think you want a good spot right now? I think we're going through growing pains, but I think we're still a greatest country in the world. I know you're in the UK, UK is pretty great too. No, no, no, no. We are an ailing economy that is slowly moving into complete irrelevance, but I find it funny, because you, wonderful Americans, still love to spend your wonderful US dollars on our soil, and go, ah, Hermes on Bond Street. You, you, you, you, you, you, I want my favorite places in the world. There we go. We welcome you. We should just embrace hospitality is the only thing that we have and recognize.

57:35That means here. So, you know what, fuck it. Just take everyone's dollars and get them all to come here. But you feel America is in good shape. Do you think the AI is bullshit? And the, my and viruses is cancerous thing for Vading Society. Look, I think diversity is important. Diversity of perspective, diversity of thought, creating an environment that is mere, mere, of credit is equally as important. Do you know what a laughing of that diversity invade my autocracy? Now I think we've got identity politics invade meritocracy. I think we wanna live in a society where I am judged not based on my identity, my age, LAN, but I'm judged based on my contribution and the merits of my work.

58:23And what's beautiful about tech and innovation is that you have an ecosystem where in my case, you could be a young kid, or in my parents' case, they came to this country with $20 in their pockets and had the opportunity regardless of their background to work hard and succeed, and that is the American dream. It's the underdog story that you can overcome obstacles and pursue your happiness without your identity being a limiting factor. I don't think we're a perfect meritocracy. I think we need to improve our meritocracy and we need to have more equal opportunity, but I think equal outcomes very bad thing.

59:06What concerns you most in the world, St. John, that we lose America's fragile, the ideals that built America fragile, and that we easily take them for granted and we lose those values, such as freedom of speech, such as free will, such as meritocracy. Do you feel you have freedom of speech today? I think we do have freedom of speech. It is under attack now, whether people actually use their freedom of speech and feel safe to speak up is a different story. I think your courage, there's a great Winston Churchill quote, courage is the strength to stand up and speak, but also sit down and listen. So I think we need more of that.

59:51We need the courage to speak up, but we also need the courage to listen. And one thing that makes America the greatest country in the world is our openness to debate. And debates leads to better ideas. And it leads to a stronger merit -talkers. And when you have a cancel culture where people don't feel safe to speak up and speak their views, or you have a culture where people are not willing or tolerant of other people's views or sit down and listen. then the outcomes never gonna be great. We've seen that story before. And I also think we're losing, I think something that scares me, that we talk a lot about freedom speech, but we don't talk a lot about free will.

1:00:31I think right now, social media platforms are to some extent violating my free will by algorithmically picking what content I see and not giving me choice in that equation. It's the equivalent of turning on the TV and Comcast deciding what I see. But I can't switch the channel. Can't switch from CNN to Fox News. There's no opt out button. There's no opt in button. When social media was a follower based economy, I think it was a lot healthier of an ecosystem. This move to an algorithm based economy has its benefits. There is some amazing things about that, but I think we are slowly sacrificing free will.

1:01:11And if you have free speech, but you don't have free will, then there's no point of having free speech. When I plot out 10 years, Sean, Why do you want to be in 10 years? Doing a job I love. Having meaningful relationships, family, children, enjoying every moment, good or bad, having fun. Dude, as you said, there's not many questions that I haven't asked here. I can't thank you enough for being so open. This has been incredible and I really appreciate it. Thanks, buddy. This was really fun. Now, shows like that are why I love doing what I do. I interviewed Sean many years ago. we stayed friends and having the ability to have that great conversation is just really special.

1:01:50You can watch the full video on YouTube by searching for 20VC, that's 2 -0VC. But before we leave you today, when a promising start -up files for an IPO or a venture capital firm loses its marquee partner, being the first to know gives you an advantage and time to plan your strategic response. Chances are, the information reported it first. The information The translation is the trusted source for that important first look at actionable news across technology and finance, driving decisions with breaking stories, proprietary data tools, and a spotlight on industry trends. With a subscription, you will join an elite community that includes leaders from the top VC firms, CEOs from Fortune 500 companies, and esteemed banking and investment professionals.

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From the publisher

Sean Rad is the Founder and former CEO of Tinder. Sean has made more romantic connections between humans than anyone in history with Tinder having matched 50BN different people. Sean is also the Founder of Rad Fund which has made over 100 investments in companies and funds.

In Today's Episode with Sean Rad We Discuss:

1. Lessons Scaling Tinder to the Fastest Consumer Social App:

  • Starting: How did the idea for Tinder come to Sean in a restaurant in LA?
  • Scaling: What are Sean's biggest lessons for consumer apps scaling to their first 10,000 users?
  • User Acquisition: How did a party change the entire user acquisition strategy for dinner?
  • What did Tinder not do that Sean wishes they had done?
  • What did Tinder do that with the benefit of hindsight, they should not have done?

2. Leadership Lessons from Tinder CEOship:

  • Annual Product Redesign: Why does Sean believe that every consumer company should have a complete redesign of the app every year? What are the benefits?
  • Detachment: How does Sean advise founders when it comes to detaching their happiness from the performance of the company? What works? What does not work?
  • Common Mistakes: What are the most common mistakes that Sean sees early-stage founders make when it comes to leadership?

3. Money, Wealth and Creating a Family Office:

  • How does Sean analyse his own relationship to money? How has it changed over time?
  • At what stage of wealth does Sean believe you have true financial freedom?
  • What is the single best investment Sean has made? What did he learn?
  • What is the worst investment he has made? What did he learn?
  • What have been the single hardest and most surprising elements of creating a family office?

4. Love, Death, Marriage:

  • In what ways does Sean think love has changed with time? How do we deal with the loneliness pandemic?
  • What does Sean believe are the most non-obvious but important secrets to a happy marriage?
  • How does Sean approach and think about his own spirituality today? Why does he not fear death?

 

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