Alan Sugar fires Jamie Redknapp and more of the funniest stories this week | Extra shot

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1:44On the show today, Alan Sugar tears Jamie Redknapp a new arsehole. Shaquille O 'Neal hits up a porn star's 21st birthday party. and your chance to eat dinner with the mother of the second best footballer in the world. My name is Jack. JP's here. Buongiorno. Buongiorno. And Zach as well. Buongiorno. How's everyone doing? Very good. Thank you very much. Yeah. Very good. Yeah. Big week. Last pod in a studio for a while because next week we're going to be down the pub. We're hitting the road. Huge. We're bloody mental. Yeah. But we are, we're doing, so we're going to do extra shot next week from the pub but then we're also going to do the Patreon from there and we are inviting Patreon members to come along because we're crazy like that.

2:30Sort of pop-up live show. Yes. Free for Patreon. Patreon party, you might call it. Yeah, Patreon party. You'll only find out the name of the pub if you're a Patreon subscriber. Yeah. It's like an illegal rave. You have to dial up a certain number. Maybe we should do it. Head to this phone box. We'll be posting the location in Patreon. So yeah, if you're not already a member, patreon.com forward slash Upshot Towers. Buy your membership and then you'll be able to join us in the pub next week. Yeah. Also, don't come at 10 a.m., which is what I told you to do last week. Come probably more about 3 p.m.

3:04Yeah, we'll send the detail, but we've moved it to the afternoon. It's a more sociable time. No one will come apart from absolute low lives. Speaking of people with a lot of time on their hands, Lord Alan Sugar was enjoying a quiet Saturday afternoon, firing out foul-mouthed tweets to Piers Morgan when his Amstrad emailer began to buzz. It was Claude Littner, his bald-headed consigliere from The Apprentice. Turn your Amstrad on! Redknapp's boys talking Codswallop on the skybox! Barked Claude.

3:41And he was. Is it a chimney sweep? Does Claude even talk like that? Not really.

3:55but jamie certainly was chatting some codswall up down the line as he was on pundit duty for tottenham's win over west ham back in september and on air he was asked about the legacy of dan levy who just stepped down as tottenham chairman after after 24 years and jamie was clearly a fan of the work that Dan had done there. He began by referencing the state of the club under Alan Sugar, who'd owned Spurs for 10 years before Dan took over. And Jamie said, you think back to how Alan Sugar left the club, it was a complete mess. Daniel Levy has left this club in a really good way. And the people in charge can now look at this club and really believe this can go forward.

4:39so that was nearly a month ago now and alan sugar was fuming so he fired out a tweet reading jamie redknapp is a double barrel idiot he talks a load of rubbish he said when dan levy took over spurs alan sugar left the club in a right mess he and sky will be hearing from my lawyers monday he just tagged at redknapp just not just add the redknapp the redknapp clan so he's basically He's saying, I'm suing you for saying I left Tottenham in a mess. Yeah, exactly. And Sugar, he put his best lieutenants on it. I think Nick and Margaret were camped outside the bushes, in the bushes outside Redknapp's house.

5:20Karen Brady on this one. Sky were shuddering at the prospect of a tribunal meeting with Claude Littner. Send in the A-team. Yeah. And then on Friday night's coverage of Bournemouth against Fulham, Redknapp was forced to read out a grovelling apology. I've got a clip of it here. seen Lord Sugar's response on social media to something Jamie said on the 13th of September when talking about Daniel Levy leaving Spurs. Yes, Ping, I'd said that at the time that Lord Sugar had left the club in a mess. I just want to make clear that he stabilised the club and invested heavily during his time as chairman.

5:52When he took over in 1991, Spurs were closed to bankruptcy and by the time he stepped away, the financial position had significantly turned around. All the money put into the team and the facilities, and I apologise to Lord Sugar and his family for all the misunderstanding or any harm caused and I'm more than happy more than happy to set the record straight oh that's so good stinging I love the like I'd like to apologize to Lord Sugar and his family and to the British public Sugar's grandkids were a bit there's something so funny about someone reading a like obviously a statement written by Alan Sugar's lawyers but having to try and make it look a bit natural yeah obviously he does an okay job no he does yeah he does an okay job it has real naughty schoolboy vibes in the headmaster's office apologising to the teacher who's handbaggy shattering.

6:40Yeah, given that it's an absolute body smacking, he's handled it well. He started with, forgive me, my lord.

6:52So basically, Alan Sugar sued him. Alan Sugar sued him for this comment that he made. Because apparently he also, he or Sky, I'm not sure, had to make a 10 grand donation to charity. Do you think that that was the amount that Alan said you need to pay out that's the damages that he's done to my business empire 10 bags do you know how much Amstrad's lost how many injection moulded satellite dishes I haven't been able to sell yeah did he leave I mean sorry I don't want to step into the trap here he didn't leave Spurs in a mess no as Jamie said clear the debts I would also like to make clear that Alan did not leave it in a mess give it a week and you'll be doing yours that's just off one thread it's a bit like what we have from FIFA someone messaged me the other day being like I see you sold out to FIFA I was like what?

7:40what did FIFA make you do? nothing they threatened to sue us and we were like bring it on trying to turn it into a scandal and we just never heard from them again someone messaged me being like you haven't spoken about it since they obviously got to you I was like what? they shut up I wanted them to make more of it so we could try and fan the flames do more fan those flames I love that well if you want to do that then Alan Sugar's Alan Sugar's Amstrad There's one bear you can stroke I certainly won't be criticising Amstrad or The Apprentice after that BBC's ratings have been tanking since the new series The Apprentice I just apologise to the Sugar family I also once in my previous venture which was like a sort of tabloidy news thing we did something about this guy and he was complaining again he was messaging me personally and he was really angry and he was like you need to apologise and you need to apologise to my parents.

8:31Then he goes, and your parents need to apologise to my parents. For how they brought you up. I was like, what? Do you think Suga got Harry Redduff on the line? Yeah, surely they sort of, kind of contemporaries. Yeah, they're kind of the same ilk. Harry was managing in the 90s in West Ham. Yeah. Yeah, I reckon they're similar. To clarify, was Claude Littner involved in this? So no But he was He was CEO Of Spurs When Alan Sugar Was in charge Right Yeah Does everyone know Who Claude Littner is Claude Littner In case Jim needs to Caps you up Claude Littner If you ever watch The Apprentice He's the bald The bald guy Who absolutely Savaged people In interviews Yeah There's the one Where they go in For interview day Yeah And yeah He crushes him Doesn't he He's actually shit Yeah I actually I was looking up Some of Claude's my savage moments this week.

9:26We've got a clip here. This is my 10th year of doing this. And I've got to say that when I read your application form and then when I read your CV, it filled me with pleasure. There were no boastful brags about how great you are and how you're the greatest salesman or you're the greatest everything. It was very, very mature. I've never put so many ticks next to anybody. and then I came on to actually look at the proposal that you're pitching for Lord Sugar and frankly it's a bloody disgrace it's a bloody disgrace the 10 years I've done this I've never seen something that's put together two bloody pages with pictures on one page what do you think you're coming here for what do you think you're coming here for you can leave

10:22there's nothing to argue you're giving me pictures of sailboats you can be pictures of sailboats what am i going to work on pictures of sailboats what is that what is that that's the definition of a shit sandwich isn't it

10:43didn't even ask him a question no that's so good that's great so he negotiated the transfer of Jürgen Klinsmann yeah he was CEO so Sugar basically said that when he took over Tottenham which was early 90s the club was like was in a bit of a financial mess and he hired Claude Littner and his first words to him it's like World War 3 in there go sort it out and Claude and one of his first acts as CEO was to stop the daily milk deliveries to the stadium. So apparently they'd always get milk delivered there just in case the players would train. And he was like, oh, that's fucking ridiculous. Go to Tesco if they want milk.

11:24Kind of agree. Yeah. With Claude. Yeah. And then he fixed the club. Yeah, he fixed it up. And I'd just like to say that by the time Alan Shaker left the club, it was a fantastic financial position. He sort of laid the, in a way, laid the foundations for the success that had come around. over the following decade. I'm happy to set the record straight. There were some other good stories from that era. So, Parody Alachuga used to dish out stock market tips in the dressing room. The reserve goalkeeper, Esper Bardson, ends up sacking off football at 25 and becoming a city trader. Because of the stock tips.

12:00I thought he did that well. I think he did like a year at Watford after that and then he was probably by that point he was making so much of the stock market. I saw the original apprentice. I think we might have told this story before. Alan Sugar was trying to sign Emmanuel Petit for Spurs before he joined Arsenal. And Petit flew over and had face-to-face meetings with Alan Sugar at the Tottenham HQ. And afterwards, Sugar was like, look, I'll get you a cab back to the hotel. And Petit gets in the cab and diverts the cabbie straight to Arsene Wenger's house and signs for Arsenal. you can only imagine how angry I'll pay for the bloody can surprise is not a lawsuit on Petit to be honest probably it was to be honest yeah because it was there was another lawsuit actually that cropped up because he basically had this big fallout with Teddy Sheringham so Teddy Sheringham accused Alan Sugar of not investing enough in top quality players for Spurs and they have this big row over a new contract Teddy wants a longer contract.

13:09Sugar basically tells him to fuck off and Teddy joins Man United. And then a few years later, Alan sues the Daily Mail because they've run an article that called him miserly in his spending at Spurs. And Teddy Sheringham is called up as a witness for the defence for the Daily Mail in court. Fuck. Does he testify? Yeah, yeah, yeah. He testifies in court. I mean, I guess you would, wouldn't you? If you're that salty. I've asked for a pay rise and the gaffers said, go on, fuck off. Who won? Sugar won, actually. He always won. I read a news report from the first day of the trial and it says that Alan Sugar left court in tears.

13:46Really? The cream always rises to the top. Yeah, he always wins. Yeah. Fair play to him. Yeah. Yeah, yeah. So Jamie Redknapp won't be repeating any comments about Alan Sugar every weekend. You can expect to see him in court. I do think they got better under Dan Levy. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Also, didn't Alan Sugar have like a long legal battle with Terry Venables? What, over him leaving? Yeah, I mean, I was going to tread carefully. Yeah, don't say too fucking much, mate. Venables was manager and then Alan Sugar sacked him and he said, I felt like I'd sacked Bambi because everyone loves El Teld. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

14:19He's lovely. And I think Terry then sued the club. There was some long legal. It was quite dramatic era. I'd like to say, the Amstrad skybox is a fantastic device. Arguably one of the great tech successes of modern Britain. Didn't you try and get on The Apprentice, JP? I nearly got on in 2013. No way. Yeah. Another skeleton in my mid-20s closet for me to unpack on a podcast. Yeah. So my ex-missus was a mad apprentice fan and she was bugging me and bugging me and bugging me to apply. And she sent me the link and it was like, you've got a day to do this. So I ended up doing the application on a Sunday and filmed it.

14:59They make you do like a webcam video thing to record yourself. got in my little suit and i just started uh i just started porn broking i had a shirt business at the time and i didn't really think anything of it right because yeah i thought like i'm not a proper business man yet did you tell tell the rolf harris story on this this was actually probably just before that actually anyway uh about a month after i submitted it i get a fucking email from uh none other than alan sugar the tv production company saying that they'd like to come and meet me and in my mind i'm like i've fucking made it here i'm gonna go and meet alan sugar like i'm gonna be in the boardroom like this is you know just before i'm on the show it's like thinking about handing my notice in at work get to this hall at holborn and there must have been 300 people in this hall it was like fucking pop idol it was like as far as i could see like snakes of chairs just like everyone queuing up pop idol for dogs pop idol for wannabe business people uh and i thought it'd just be there and then you'd find out on the day it was two weeks of interviews you go through and they're basically like trying to see what you're going to be like on telly they're not looking for business people they're looking for tv personalities yeah and it got to the friday and i got an email on the friday and i saw the numbers were certainly like dwindling down and they said uh you're through to the last 20 will be making a decision at the end of the day.

16:23Last 20? Last 20. How many were on the show? It's only about... I think it's 12. Yeah. 12, maybe 14. So I was like, honestly, I was going to have my notice in at work. So I was thinking, that's it. I'm going to be a TV personality and Lord Sugar is going to be my new business partner. Anyway, the last day was... I can't describe how grueling it was. It was like one-on-ones, debates, filming, all that shit. And it got to four o 'clock and they brought us into this hall and there's two boxes in the middle of the hall and they split us into two teams. and it was Ikea desks and it was a race to see who put the desks up first and I was at the end of my fucking tether and you can imagine how many egos are in the room, like everyone going off and shit and ended up having a row with this weird guy with weird eyebrows who's Welsh over a butterfly clip and the rule was you weren't allowed to swear or properly argue because it just wasn't good for the TV and for the recording and stuff and I fucking lost it.

17:22We ended up swearing at each other and at the end of the day, I didn't find out and they said you hadn't made it and I was so salty because the fellow with the weird eyebrows managed to get on. Was he on? How did he do? You can look him up. He's done really well for himself as well. 2013 Welsh guy. What, off the apprentice? Yeah. He won. He's got like a big insurance company now. Where is he? Yeah, there he is. Alex. Alex. I remember that guy yeah yeah bastard that's excellent savage well because they want you to be dramatic but they don't want someone who's going to like ruin the recording by screaming all over yeah and they want like they really push you to see what you're going to be like on TV because it's real they do real exercises it's not stage but they want to see who's going to be best on TV and I obviously had no TV not many people do but I was just maybe a bit like raw it feels a bit too raw for your brand too real pop idol yeah yeah yeah are you entering any more and look who's winning now do you know what I mean yeah are you entering any more reality TV anytime soon I'd be Big Brother for sure yeah Love Island I'd be Big Brother Love Island I think we're a bit off Love Island mate I think it's Celebrity Scrap Hunt yeah that's a great story so you never met Sugar never met Sugar never got on and then it's quite boring going back to your day job after you've nearly touched that golden chalice.

18:46But yeah. Did you watch that series? Did you? Yeah, I did, yeah, because I wanted to see him get fired, the fucking cunt. And he got fired eventually. Didn't get to meet Claude. No, I didn't. My most important love to have seen you, JP versus Claude. Scraise. Now, arguably the biggest beneficiary from the rise of Lamin-Yamal has been his dad, right, who's sort of turned himself into an Insta celeb under his username, HustleHard304. So he does like cooking videos now on Insta. Kind of makes sense. They're not amazing, but it's always chicken. So I saw he did chicken nuggets the other day, 20 ,000 likes.

19:28Feels very Brooklyn Beckham. Yeah, I'd say it's a bit more ambitious in some ways. It's less high-end, but more better cooking. But he's doing really well. But, you know, he talks a good game about hustling hard. But in fact, it is Lamine's mum who's doing the grind. So there's an event in London next month called the Christmas Sports Dinner Gala Party. And the special guest for it is none other than Sheila Ebana, Lamine Yamal's mother. So we're looking at the event bright of it now. It's just a picture of her at the top, just like lifted from her instant. Nice picture. It's another picture. And yeah, Lamine Yamal's name's in capitals, hers isn't.

20:08and it says don't miss the chance to meet the mother of the best player in the world tickets to get in so it's 400 people 150 quid to get in but if you want to be on her table it's 300 quid it was actually I've been following this story all week and it was originally 700 quid but it's now 300 she's discounted it what's the motivation to want to have dinner with her like to understand how to raise the second best mother of the best player in the world second best second best yeah and if you pay just 150 quid you just get to sit near her and just like look at her from the middle. So you also, the mega VIP, the 300 one, you get a photo with her.

20:43Oh, it's worth it. And you get to be on her table, but I think it's like, there are like probably four long tables. Tables, yeah. And you get a pic with her. What are you doing with that picture? She's teaching you how to raise the second best footballer of all time. Yeah. Yeah. Are there other tiers? Is it like 40 quid, you can take his cousin's dog for a walk? You know, he's a little brother. You can like sort of play. FaceTime with him. Play Lego with his little brother. I was actually looking at pictures of them at the Ballon d 'Or and they were all in, like, Lamine does black tie with a black shirt.

21:13It looks quite good. And his little brother's in a mini tuxedo. Really? Three. And he's got, like, a black tie dummy. It, like, fits with the outfit. It's so good. Swag. Yeah, it's pretty swag. But, yeah, what are you doing with that photo? Like, sticking it on the wall? One for the grandkids at the time I met. Also, isn't his contract, like, multi-million? Like, why are you, like, wasting your time going to do dinners? Yeah, I was wondering about that, but I think it's nice to have your own income and not always just be like, can I have some money? I don't know. I think she's still dining out on him.

21:48I know you respect her entrepreneurial spirit. Going alone now. I pulled myself to this gala by my bootstraps. Hustle. What is this event? Anyway, the sports dinner Christmas gala. I think we need to go. Yeah, and by the way, it's on November the 7th. A bit early for Christmas. Well, she's busy. You say that, but Jack's mum's charging 40 quid to have a pint with her at the pub for our live show next week. Bring along my cousin. Yeah, sadly, I actually can't make the date because I'm attending Usman Dembele's uncle bonfire night celebration. 7th of November. Which is annoying, actually, because it clashes with Claire Foden's bingo night.

22:33I was wondering, like... Maybe we should go. yeah it could be quite a good do you want to pay full whack and get the picture yeah we want to go 300 all in I don't really know anything about her like she's quite she's been not that public the dad's I think they're separated but the dad's been like obviously milking it surely you need to know a little bit more about her if you're going to splash out 700 quid to have a bit of scrum with her is she going to do a speech do you think she's going to speak I looked at the program and it's just like champagne reception meal DJ and dancing why is Laminio Mow's mum that is she charging for a dance probably twerk for yeah because it's it was going to be at Nobu which is like mega swanky oh yeah China White Vibes and now it's a hotel in Tower Hill that looks quite swanky to be honest so they've slashed the prices what do you reckon the crowd's like sort of like sports networking like people that go to like motivational speech business conferences do like a talk from Jordan Belfort yeah yeah yeah maybe like want to be a football agent yeah you're trying to get connected with those kind of people maybe.

23:36I do love a relative cashing in though. Do you remember when Harry Kane was stuck at Tottenham desperately trying to leave because he'd signed that new contract and everyone kept posting that picture? I've got a tweet of it here. Tweeted by FPL Betting. Charlie Kane, brother of Harry Kane, has his own sports agency with only one client, Harry Kane. He goes to work suited and booted every single day. We're just looking at him in his desk. At his desk in a three-piece suit. Can you imagine Harry coming in to arrange a meeting and you come in it's your brother in a three piece for a meeting with you I'll just check my calendar it's completely empty you're late but it wasn't the gag was because he'd obviously done this like new contract with Spurs and apparently there was a gentleman's agreement that he could leave and everyone was like that's what happens when your brother is your agent I love how neat his little desk is as well he's got his yeah his book's laid out perfectly a lot of colour coding of the diary going on in that office it is quite hard I think being particularly a brother yeah of a famous footballer like I was reading about Glenn Hoddle's brother Carl was a good footballer he played for Barnett and apparently once he was signing this this autograph hunter you know those guys who just hang out after games hand you the the book and he signed it for him then the guy looked really disappointed and the guy just went can you sign it as your brother please so dispiriting um it's a bit and also of the Rodri Giggs thing we talked about how like the first words that Rodri Giggs' wife ever said to him were where's your brother oh my god and Ryan would just nick his girlfriends even when they were young fuck yeah and then there's also Jamie Redknapp's brother Marky come across him which quite unkind but it is funny someone's Harry Redknapp did a birthday post being like happy birthday Marky so proud of you and this guy Yidi Amin tweeted Marky has got to be some kind of tax fiddle that's just Jamie coked off his bonce surely it does it does look a bit like that it looks yeah it must be a weird life being the brother I think you want to just do something completely different which Marky's actually done I forget what he does but he's some kind of property he's carved out a career all on his own he's done fucking well if you're trying to piggyback on the career you're always in that kind of ilk whereas if you just do your own thing but also like if my brother offered me a million quid I'm taking it yeah true I guess maybe you start something with it I don't know do you reckon Harry tells him to come to work with a three piece suit uniform He's got more of Harry in him Yeah It's sort of a cross between Jamie and Harry One final family member Have you seen Bin Laden's heavy metal goth son He's like the lead singer from Creed Yeah I just saw this on Instagram Osama Bin Laden's son has grown into a goth metal hybrid He's got like Long curly hair Goatee and then he's wearing like leather jacket And some like sort of heavy metal-ish t-shirt drainpipe jeans and he's got a wife who's sort of dressed the same.

26:33Does he live in America? No, he tried to move here but unsurprisingly he can't get a visa for the Schengen area or Britain. So he's in Saudi but he's an artist and he does like loads, he does Americana. He like loves American shit which is ironic. Aussie Bin Laden.

26:54He's actually the only one of Bin Laden's like 30 kids who's ever denounced him. Really? Yeah. Weird life. also just hard being a heavy metal goth in Saudi Arabia isn't it I've never seen pictures of blokes dressed like that in Saudi no it must be hot in that leather jacket he's quite a look do you think he got into heavy metal because he found it on Bin Laden's hard drive yeah along with Chicken Little Chicken Little and quite a lot Linkin Park Slipknot Avril Lavigne that was his gateway drug yeah do you think he manscapes I think he needs it look at state of his hair. I don't think heavy metal vibe is manscaping, is it?

27:34His hair, someone with long hair and a lot of facial hair. I guess you could say that about me. You just described yourself. I famously manscaped. Yeah, I did, I went on holiday recently and I did. Really? Yeah. Got the whole lot. Got the old white hot lawnmower out. Oh, you've got the white hot one. Yeah, I've got the white hot, which actually, you upgraded. Where's my white hot? We got sent some new ones by manscaped. what? Yeah. Have you got one ready? I've got one, yeah. You haven't got the white and gold though. Jack came in one last Christmas and I'm going to get the white one this Christmas.

28:02Yeah, you can have it again. Actually, that would go down well in Saudi, white and gold. Yeah, nice. That's quite a Saudi vibe, isn't it? Saudi Prince vibe. Whack that thing out. Are they sort of manscapy? I really don't want to buy this. Yeah. I can imagine, yeah. Because you want to keep yourself cool, don't you? Yeah, but there's quite a lot of facial hair and I just assume that if you're doing a lot of facial hair, you're trimming. No, I think maybe not. I don't know. Charlie Kane definitely definitely manscaped he's got enough time on his manscapes every morning he's pristine no one's doubting his grooming routine he looks great yeah the lawnmower 5 ultra is the device that we're rocking at the moment from Manscaped which helps handle your most sensitive areas with care reducing nicks cuts and irritation especially where it matters most.

28:58So yeah, the white and gold one. It's the one, the one there, they're pushing. Whitehold looks, smooth results. Bring the heat without cooking your skin. I don't know why it's a heat thing. You don't want heat there, do you? It's not, just to clarify, it won't be hot. It's actually ice cool. Yeah. Let's just set the record straight on that one. So yeah, you can get one from Manscaped and you can get 15 % off, get your pubes in order for the autumn. Probably the most important season for it, I would argue. Autumnal trim. Don't ask me why it just is. So use code UPSHOT and you get 15 % off your entire order at manscaped.com.

29:33Oh, actually, one related, maybe this is a bit grim, but one related thing on sort of manscapes and pews. We were talking a while ago about dingleberries. Do you remember that? Yeah. Someone messaged in saying that, sorry, I can't remember your name. I can't find it. But apparently in Italy, they're called Tarzanellos because they swing on the pews. Like Tarzan. but you won't just manscape those straight off you don't even have to worry about them no Tarzanello's with manscapes no no no the manscape just goes straight to the roof because then the manscape tool is washed clean yeah it is don't come complaining to me if it isn't but I'm pretty sure it is you've got to get that air in order do you know what I mean manscapes are ended up actually another one who definitely manscapes Russell Martin yeah he's a bit metrosexual definitely you know back in 2024 Russell Martin was basking in life as one of Europe's most feated young coaches.