Jake Humphrey: LinkedIn’s favourite son

0:00Hey Chicago, class it up with Crocs. You know back to school is coming in fast. So why wait to find your new fave footwear? Step into a local Crocs store and step into your new look. Try it. Style it. Make it yours. Because the right pair doesn't just show up. It shows off. First day fits, handled. Walk out ready for whatever's next. Visit your nearest Crocs store today. This message is brought to you by Apple Card. Shave ice by the beach. A trip to the state fair. And a throwback flick at the local drive-in. They're more than just items to check off the summer bucket list. They're also opportunities to earn 2 % daily cash back when you use your Apple Card with Apple Pay.

0:48Apply for Apple Card now and use in minutes with Apple Pay. Subject to credit approval, Apple Card is issued by Goldman Sachs Bank USA, Salt Lake City branch. Terms and more at applecard.com. This episode is brought to you by Facebook. So you were scrolling on Marketplace, and there it was, the bike you'd been searching for. You sent a message, and it turned out the seller was super chatty, kind of funny, and an avid cyclist. The next thing you know, you're in a cycling crew. Well, a community cycling group. The thing about Facebook, you might find more than what you're looking for. From a browse to a bike ride, this summer, find more on Facebook.

1:305.12am. Former TV presenter Jake Humphrey glugs down a tumbler of activated charcoal water. Wondering why his wife is wasting the day, he shakes her awake and asks, what are your goals for Q4? It's just another day in a high-performance household. But how did it come to this? From gungeon kids to grindset guru, this is the story of LinkedIn's favourite son. Welcome back to The Upshot. I'm Jack. Zach is here as always. Hello, Jack. Hello. And we've got two special guests who were very hotly requested guests, I should say. Oh, wow. From among the audience. We've got Jake and Jacob from Screen Rot Podcast.

2:09Thanks so much for, yeah. It's a pleasure to be here. Thank you to the audience who've requested our presentation. Who would have thought that your audience contains an overlap of freelance graphic designers that live in Zone 2, Manscaped and VPN users. better help subscribers all over London so if you haven't heard Scream Rot it is an excellent guide to the people online and on all screens I guess but like with a focus on online some of the characters who like you know a lot of them you see them all the time and you've never really thought about what anyone else thinks about them we talk about yeah there's a number of like 20 year old TikTokers that we 34 year old talk about relatively frequently we're here to talk about Jake Humphrey You guys have done an episode on.

2:54We have, yeah. And again, a real, there are people that, the patrons and people that listen, they do not like Jake and his insistence on hard work. Yeah. Well, you guys have that analogy that he's like, he wants you to be your own arsehole boss. It wasn't that the idea. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, exactly. Be a cunt to yourself. You like insist that you arrive early, insist that you stay late. Exactly that. It's like, if you're freelance and you've got, you know, a little bit of like free will in your life, make sure you batter that out of yourself. And yeah, it's, I think it's something you're kind of used to seeing in Americans.

3:33Do you know what I mean? I think that kind of grind set culture, it feels more at home in America, land of the free, the American dream, you know, build something for yourself. Here, it's like, we all kind of just like being office drones, don't we? We're like just sort of pottering about, you know, take our time with the coffee machine. I think that's why the people that listen to our pod, they're shirkers the people that listen to our podcast they're cucks yeah they're cucks has anyone actually met anyone who likes Jake Humphrey because they're like clearly you look at his podcast and it's one of the most popular ones yeah in the country right and yet every single person that I've ever spoken to about him can't stand him yeah so who are these people he's like the podcast equivalent of the film Avatar where it's like it made like 500 million quid but like no one I've never met anyone's like you know what I fucking love Avatar man like yeah it's fucking mental But I think that there must be a silent majority out there of Humphreyites because there must be loads of people out there that want to be the top salesman at their window selling firm in Bedford.

4:34Do you know what I mean? And they are listening to Humphrey to get those tips. I would kind of get it if it was like, you know, freelancers who've started off on their own and done well. It's Thierry Henry crying about leaving Arsenal. Do you know what I mean? I mean, I guess he's probably a sole trader. Is he a CEO? Do you know what I mean? It's like, I'm an estate agent in Hornchurch. What can I learn from Thierry Henry? He repositioned himself from the left wing to a number nine. Do I need to move into marketing? What does it mean? How does this apply to my life? As we'll see, it basically comes down to some pretty annoying rules for life.

5:12Yes. Should we get into the story, Zach? Let's get into it. So Jake Humphrey was born in Peterborough in 1978. He's a middle child of three. His mum's a teacher. And his dad was the chief executive of Age Concern Norfolk, which, you know, objectively, Age Concern, it's a nice, nice organisation. But there's already something quite annoying about that. Do you not find that? His dad was just dead. Yeah. Oh, look after old people, are you? It's very fucking clean shirt, isn't it? All of it. I bet they were the most productive old people in the whole of Norfolk as well get them up get up Doris that scarf's not going to finish itself is it piss themselves if you don't get them up your grandkids aren't going to want to come and see you if you've not done any spreadsheets today you daft cow yeah it's unfair but it is already I've already building a picture about him he's the most powerfully Peterborough man of all time actually I was like yeah checks out checks out Peterborough East of England weird place yeah there is a partridge element to him particularly the TV career massively and he's from the right part of the world yeah exactly it all fits we're building a picture for sure yeah he doesn't stay at Peterborough for too long though so he moves with his family to Norwich when he's seven and after a few years growing up there he gets a paper round which you know a lot of kids do at that age but Jake must have been good because 25 years later he gives an interview to Norfolk Life where he says that people in the village still remember his round.

6:46Is that fucking true? Yeah. It's literally quite, when I go around the village, people remember. Genuinely, people do remember my time as a paperboy because I used to dump them. I used to dump them in a bin. It's the only way. There's a woman who knows my mum who's still like, your son would just leave the leaflets hanging out the bin. Just sitting going to smoke somewhere. Fuck you. He's got a podcast now. He's talking about a lad from Bessie. that's the only way you would remember a paper round if it was fucked how you get it wrong if you're doing it right you go under the radar the paper's just there it's like a referee you don't know they're on the pitch you don't know they're on the pitch yeah you don't want to know your paper boy's name you know your paper boy girl's name he was the Mike Dean of paper boys there's too much about him you're not the show the paper's the show he's probably reading the fucking headlines through the letterboxes let Murdoch sing alright yeah like the headlines of the daily express in norwich yeah um anyway while jake is infamous with the local telegraph readers he's less happy in the scouts where i'm sorry to say he gets bullied wow um i'm genuinely um that's wouldn't wish that on anyone yeah um but you've got to say a young jake humphrey little yellow neckerchief yeah he was bullied a bit so he said i remember one time at scouts i was put in a five-man tent canvas bag and they sealed the top up i remember the scoutmaster opening it up and telling the boys no more bullying jake nice and then i was interviewed by davina mccall canvas zipping someone in a bag is quite like cartoon bullying isn't it yeah it's pretty nice yeah it's nasty poor little joke yeah also i mean it's a five man if it's a one man and you'd be there's claustrophobia you're a five man that's fine they've done him a service there if anything Yeah, they were generous bullies.

8:36Generous bullies, yeah. He got bullied at school as well. He got probably the little yellow neckerchief again. Didn't help. Not what you want. Victim blaming. Look, nobody deserves to be bullied. So after he's getting bullied, Jake decides to follow normal bullying protocol and informs his parents who have a chat with the school. and the head teacher, I don't know what kind of protocol he was following because he decides in the whole school assembly to stand up at the front and he says, can Jake Humphrey stand up please? And in front of the whole school, Jake has to stand up and the headmaster says, Jake is being bullied.

9:20Can you please stop it? Which Jake says they may as well have just stuck a sign on his head that says, please bully me. I mean, that was the 1980s in a nutshell, isn't it? People are being made to stand up in assembly and go, this cunt's getting bullied, all right? Stop it. Or don't. I don't mind. Jake, you keep saying Jake's gay. Jake is not gay. Jake, can you wear this sign saying, oh, I'm not gay? Yeah, yeah, literally. You haven't been wearing the sign, to be fair, Jake. How would people know? Does that happen? So, yeah, I think... Is there a happy ending? Not really, to be honest. I mean, I guess his whole sort of origin story is overcoming this difficulty.

10:00but you know he spends a lot of his time with his head down the toilet so doesn't really excel in the classroom in these circumstances he does pass his GCSEs though and manages to get a job at McDonald's unfortunately it doesn't last though because he's fired for having no communication skills apparently that's unbelievable I don't know if you guys have been to McDonald's recently they're not known for their communication skills in those places I mean that's really that's why they got their screens didn't they yeah A lot of employers like Jake Humphrey. I'm slightly wary of this. Is this like a kind of self-mythologising kind of...

10:38Because I hate all that shit. You know, there's that... I don't know if he still does it. Clarkson used to do on A-level results day or whatever. He'd be like, oh, I got CCD and I'm on my yacht in the Bahamas or whatever. A-level results day is the most boring day on Twitter because it's that and then the kind of rebuttal to that. To that, yeah. Well, I didn't get any and now I'm in people just do nothing. It's like, fuck off. You know what I mean? Grow up. Yeah, now I go around tasting Turkish and Caribbean food. Stop it. He doesn't watch this. Yeah, I don't know. Jay's self-mophologizing. Yeah, he does the A-level thing as well.

11:16Does he do that as well? Every year. Every year. That is the thing now, even people like Jay Humphrey feel like they have to have overcome all this stuff. Yeah, exactly. Yeah, stop giving you, you know, like there's that bit in Sopranos where Chrissy's like, I don't know what my arc is to. Everyone's so desperate to give themselves a fucking story. We did on our Christmas live show, we did a bit about Jake Humphrey. And so I started like just Googling him to try and find videos that we hadn't used already. And I found one on a Facebook page of the school that he went to in Norfolk. And it was a video.

11:50And they said our sixth formers were lucky enough to have this video that Jake Humphrey shared as a Christmas message to the sixth formers before they kind of go away and do some revision. And so we played the video at the live show and the video is him going like, hi, Sixformers, Jake Humphrey here, just getting in touch to wish you all the best with your revision and your future exams. And you're going to go away and you're going to work hard over the Christmas break and you're going to refresh. And while you're doing that, I'd like to advise you to listen to the High Performance Podcast. The podcast I do.

12:17And it's just an advert. Just an advert for his own podcast. Not closing sales. It's quite right, though. Yeah, and he's just like, yeah, he's like, you can find it on all good podcast platforms and then that's it. Alan Partridge. It's so Alan Partridge. It's amazing. And if you want to trim your pubes as well, then that's going to go for it. Lord Moffat, I thought, oh. So yeah, he fails his A-levels as well and is kind of, yeah, he does these sort of smug posts about it. But everything happens for a reason, doesn't it? Because after failing his A-levels, Jake gets a job helping out a local TV company.

12:49And yeah, he's a runner initially. I guess like all of us, you start by making the tea. But he gets his big break when this TV company, Rapture, they launched a video game show called Gamers, but the A is an at because it's 1999. That's class. So that's when, you know, gaming had that like, just sticker.com. Yeah, yeah. Get a Z in there if we can. I'm surprised it's not a Z at the end, actually. Gamers should have been, yeah. I had a look that year, the games, it was a vintage year for games. Pokemon Gold. Wow. Age of Empires 2. GTA London. Anyway, when he's not beating up wild snorlaxes, Jake is out on the pool.

13:28So in the summer of 99, he meets his future wife, Harriet, in a nightclub in Norwich. It's quite a normal way to meet someone. Can't imagine Jake Humphrey in a nightclub. Yeah, anyway, then he then gets his really big break in 2001 when CBBC swooped for him. So I was looking through Jake Humphrey's early shows. I sort of remember some of these. Monster Lobster. So it's him. Sadly, the footage has been lost, but him in a pink lobster outfit. He's running around the Blue Peter Garden just popping balloons. It's kind of zany stuff. Rule the school, which is when pupils and teachers swap roles. Nice.

14:02The most CBBC idea. Yeah. And so the pupils teach the teachers lessons, including texting. Wow. Break dancing. Gaming. Yes. Customizing clothes, pop star skills and funky footballing. Funky footballing. You know, like CBBC has to do this thing where it's like, it needs a bit of like youth edge, but obviously it's got to be clean as hell. Like Wayne Rooney's street striker kind of eyes to dribbling around some bins and stuff like that yeah i saw the odd clip of them doing like the football one it was just drills and football lessons exactly how the teachers would have done it how is this funky sorry you just add gunge really and then it just becomes yeah everything becomes funky with a bit of gunge i i i it was i think about gunge earlier oh yeah i used to think about being gunged a lot yeah you wanted to be gun fearful or i think i was quite keen to either be gunned or to gunge someone i think you don't have to look far for the symbolism i think what do you mean you were teenage boy wondering about being gunned or gunging other people well i do i i've never experimented in this but i do wonder if there's a little fetish in the back of my brain for gun gun yeah i'm trying to think of who was like around the gunge in those days well dave benson phillips on get your own back he's the king of guns yeah what's her name cat deely yeah cat deely would have been around the gunge you fancy cat deely I think Holly Willoughby was around the gunge a lot of the time.

15:23I wouldn't mind seeing her in some gunge. I'm not loving you saying the word gunge. I must admit. I was looking at what it is. It's like custard powder with food colouring, I think. Is that what it is? It's quite watery gunge, isn't it? At one point, I wondered if it was paint. I wanted to tip it a pint of fucking Dulux over it. I think it's like stickier than paint. Sorry to shut that up. In America, they call it slime, apparently. Holly Willoughby, sticky gunge. I'm there, man. Speaking of Holly Willoughby, actually, So Jake Humphrey then presents Fame Academy with Holly. So... Wow. Fame Academy is people trying to be pop stars and stuff.

15:56On its website, it says it was the show that launched Dave Sneddon on his poptastic career. You don't have to remind me about Fame Academy, brother. I've been listening to Lamar. I know where Lamar came from. That's actually a big name. Yeah, Lamar was on there. I don't think he won it. Why did they mention him and not Dave Sneddon? No. Anyway, Jake and Holly do really hit it off. So she lives in Brighton. He's got a place in London. so you know they're off from working late Holly will crash at his place and that became something that he would later boast about the Daily Mirror so Jake said eventually it got to the point where we couldn't be bothered to get the blow up bed out so for about six months we slept in the same bed nothing ever happened I wouldn't want to say I met my wife too early but I would just say Holly's worst habit is she sleeps naked joking of course I think someone else wanted to gunge Holly with me this is real like kind of like actor boasting they got to kiss her co-star vibes it's like you know that's not real like just it's like you're kind of doing a facsimile of the thing that other people dream of doing do you think if he tracked down the guys who bullied him in Norwich yeah and when they give him shit he's like yeah have you ever slept in the same bed as Holly Willoughby and nothing happened she slept naked you know so if you're going to say joking of course it's not going to happen no it's not working anyway there are there's no footage not much footage I can find of these early programs online but there are some excellent old Q &As he did with fans on the CBBC website.

17:20They're still up. So I picked out a few of my favourites. So Charlotte, age 10, from Hornchurch, she said, congrats on being a presenter. Was it a lot of work getting there where you are now? And, you know, I think 10 years old is probably too young to be given grind set advice, but it's in there. So Jake replied, yeah, it was quite hard work getting to where I'm now. I have had a holiday no longer than six days in the last five years and I've never had a day off work sick. I always think if you're not at work being busy on the telly there'll be 4 ,000 people queuing up to take your job hell she's 10 mate she doesn't care about the man in marketing nicking her job that's so good and also the caps locks I have never caps locks had a day off work sick there's another one where someone goes what are you doing on your summer holidays he goes summer holidays what are those but like the qualifier of I've had the holiday no longer than six days that's just a holiday that's basically a week If you're not including travel time You're just on a week Everyone has a week's holiday a year I bet he's not counting the weekends in that as well Monday to Friday It was actually 10 days 6 working days Have you ever had a holiday longer than 10 working days?

18:30How many of those have you had? He also reveals a closely guarded secret Someone asks about his third nipple And he says 3 is better than 2 and later clarifies It runs in the family, my uncle and nephew have them too Looks like a mole but if you look closely It's a small nipple This is Sasha age 20. Why is Sasha age 20 writing into CBBC? To ask about third nipples. Also, if I was from Norwich and I was talking about me, my uncle and my dad having a third, I would keep that on the down low, I think. That's hack stuff about what they do in the Fens, all right? But like, I would be keeping that quiet.

19:04Especially when third nipples are involved. Yeah. 20 years old is quite old to be writing in CBBC. As is 17 and 18, I'd argue, but I didn't stop Nicole and Vicky from Chatham asking, if you're trapped on a desert island, which one person would you want with you? And Jake replies, probably two girls called Nicole and Vicky from Chatham, as well as that, maybe a J-Lo or two. Jeez Louise. He wrote that while he was a kid's TV. Yeah, so I think he's probably only 21 or something in fairness. Okay, yeah, yeah, yeah. He's already with his girlfriend, wife. Actually, there's one, which I didn't include here.

19:39This is 2003, where they ask about his girlfriend. He says, I'm not with anyone at the moment. so he must have either not realised these were going to go on the website these are going directly to them right but yeah as you said though he is a big star in this like monoculture world and he's hanging out with the cream of pop culture McFly Angelica Bell David Sneddon and in 2004 he starts thinking about like where do I want to take my career and decides I want to be in sports presenting and so he gets arguably his first job in the field which is hosting Bamzuki Yes. I actually didn't remember Bamzuki.

20:14I think I saw a clip of this recently. I don't remember it contemporaneously, I don't think. It's Robot Wars, but with cartoon creatures instead of robots. Right. So they're programmed. I've got a clip of it. Oh, and by the way, the graphics are fucking awful. Oh, yeah, this is good stuff. I do remember. Welcome to Bamzuki, the show that puts the nation's virtually created creatures, a.k.a. Zooks. Zooks. Every single Zook we'll see throughout the series has been designed using this software and I've actually designed my own house, Luke. This is Bernard. I think you'll agree he's a pretty good looking fella.

20:47You'll be seeing a lot of him and hearing quite a lot of Rich who's going to guide us through the contests. Rich, mate, you're supposed to build your own house, Luke. The show started. Where is it? I think he's quite good. Oh, yeah. At his job there. Yeah. No? Yeah, I think he falls into a category of broadcasters. Do you know what I mean? And as I get older, I start to really respect the broadcasters of this world. Do you know what I mean? the anchorman. It's not an easy role. You know, it's easy to be the shit talker who flies off the handle and the editors have to work hard to get something out of that.

21:18He is, when you think what he's working with there, I don't think he can see that fucking Zookie thing. No, obviously. You don't think so? What? I actually, I'm fine with you, my shoulder just crumbling before my eyes. You mean to tell me the Zooks aren't real? The Zooks didn't fight to the death for our entertainment. There's not a little graveyard of Zooks outside BBC's television centre. I think, I think. They're not real. I think he's having to pretend that's there. That's what I have to do when we do the podcast. Well, I mean, he is like an autocue guy, right? He's like, put something on the thing, he's going to read it first time every time.

21:57And it's smooth. Yeah, it's smooth. He's not like, he's never been, I mean, I'm sure you've got some clips later or some bits of his kind of awkward interactions on BT Sport. He's not a funny guy, shall we say. Do you know what I mean? He's not like, where as I would say Greg James is a broadcaster but he brings ostensibly funny he's sort of goofball isn't he Greg James that's his thing he's a daft guy yeah but Jake is he's treating Bamzuki like it's the like the funeral of the Pope he's taking it seriously and I suspect that's the thing of like from early on he was like I need to have a broad CV do you know what I mean it's like I'm not I'm not going to be doing Bamzuki's aren't going to be here for me forever no no no Zuki's isn't going 10 seasons one day someone's going to need to do the Champions League quarterfinals and can't rely on Gunge.

22:39Yeah, yeah, yeah. Gunge isn't going to be around forever. He's a man that can commentate on the highlights of two Zooks fighting each other and of Fenerbahce versus Besiktas as well. He can do both, yeah. It's good shit. I mean, funny you mentioned him broadening out because around this time, Jake decides, I'm ready to make the leap fully to sport. I don't want to be doing kid stuff forever. And so he twists the arm of this executive at BBC Sport for a meeting and he's like, how can I make this step? and Jake claims that the bloke said to him, you will never work in BBC Sport. Rubbish. This is absolutely rubbish.

23:12No one buying that. No one. It's just like, it's just part of, this is his like mythologizing of his origin story. Yeah, what you mean is, oh, like, yeah, everyone said that they didn't want me to do it, but they did just keep giving me the jobs. So like they, they said I'd be shit at it because I was bad at communication. Then I was a TV presenter on CBeebies for like five years. And then I wanted to do BBC Sport and they said, you're definitely not going to do that. And then they gave me the job and then I did that. Why would you say that anyway to someone? I don't know. I guess it's like a, I guess it's like maybe it's Sir Alex kind of siege mentality stuff.

23:41It's like they're all out to get us. That's the, he's like Michael Jordan. He's taking it personally when those fake people are. Well, he does. And Jake says that therefore he had to start at the bottom rung on the ladder, which is match reporter for Five Live. Surely that's just what the position they would give you. If you don't just go to the executive and they're like, sure, do you want to host match of the day? You've got to start. That seems like a good job. That seems like a good job. You get to cover games with BBC. There's no reason for you to do so. You've not written about football.

24:11Exactly. Crucially, you've never played football. Like, this is what I mean about, like, there's so much of this nowadays of like, oh God, you know, you can't be a straight white guy in entertainment. It's like, yeah, but it was far too weighted the other way. Like, completely unskilled guys from Norwich were just getting given jobs. Like, why would it him? You commentated on some insect fighting. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I've done Bamzuki. I would now like to do the 10 o 'clock news. I would like to do the opening of parliament I've done the Zooks Someone needs to inform the nation on what is happening in Gaza I've discussed Zookies for years I am ready to deliver quite a cutting appraisal of Netanyahu's reign as the leader of Israel I'm starting to see why the guy replied you will never work in BBS Yeah, incredible That's just a good job He's just been given a good job Well, it's not all good Oh God Jake does recall one very tough day at the office So he was reporting on a game and he said I remember on one assignment I suddenly felt this slime down my back and there was a meat pie sliding down my jacket and I turned around and there was a 17 year old who went kids TV twat and his name was Jacob Hawley I'm jealous I want to sleep in a bed with Holly Willow

25:25yeah so yeah it's long hours there's the odd pucker pie pelting but it's worth it because in 2006 he gets a gig presenting Football Focus. He's climbing pretty quickly, actually. For someone who's been told they're not allowed to climb at all. That's three years after the Bamzuki job he's getting. He gave Football Focus. Three years after the Bamzuki. Not long after he couldn't speak well enough to work in McDonald's. Anyway, with that gig on Football Focus, Jake's sports career really takes off. So he gets a job hosting the 2007 Cricket World Cup, does a bit of final score and some reporting on the Beijing Olympics.

26:01But for him, there's only really one jewel in the crown, and that is the BBC Sports Personality of the Year, which, as we've discussed this many times in this podcast, is the most worthless gong in sport, or in fact, anything, really. But for Jake, all of this sort of, you know, back-slapping, these saccharine montages, he lapsed that shit up. So he said, for me, spotty was the peak. Every year it was on as a kid. it was the one show at BBC Sport that stood above all others and being asked to host it was a true honour. I was just the 15th presenter in 54 years. Yeah, so he loved Spotty doing Spotty.

26:45And from there, in 2009, he gets a gig presenting BBC Sport's F1 coverage, which is a big, big job as well. And it's unfortunately fair to say that he doesn't go down too well with the BBC's petrol heads. So he said, it was announced at 10am and at 10.30am my wife rang in floods of tears. She'd just been on the internet and cried, everyone thinks you're going to be shit. Cheers. Cheers. Cheers to the petrol. Have they not seen me on Namzuki? I couldn't even see those fucking things. Bit like F1. That bad reception from F1 fans doesn't stop the BBC giving him a role covering the 2011 Royal Wedding though.

27:29So there's this bit where he's supposed to be reporting live from a Spitfire or something like... Lancaster Bomber or something. Lancaster Bomber, like World War II plane flying over Buckingham Palace. And he's really excited about it. You know, for him, that's the highest of the high, but the technology fails, sadly. So they can't cut to him. And he says it's like one of his big regrets. What might have been... What might have been... People had seen him. Yeah. The following summer, he gets to host the 2012 Olympics again. which you know so he's getting all of the all the big events all the centrist big ones yeah yeah but his glittering bbc career is about to come to an end because in summer 2012 bt sport bag a deal to broadcast the premier league and they're on the hunt for a fresh-faced young presenter to front their coverage so it's actually he jake signs for bt sport but he's actually not going to be going over that until January 2013.

28:25But the BBC call him in late 2012 to break some terrible news. He's not going to be presenting Spotty that year. He's dropped. He's been dropped. He calls it one of the most... I can't even read it. He calls it one of the most painful vocals I've ever had. What the fuck is he talking about? All right, you hand in your notice at work and then they go, oh, and by the way, you're not going to get to do the big presentation. at Christmas what? you're leaving a week after no but I want to do the most important thing your self described most important thing of the year like I mean that is you've had a good life as well when the most painful call you've ever had is to say you don't get to present spotty and not because like you've been disgraced but because you're moving to a million pound job of BT you've made the call to take a pay rise he's literally getting a million in a year I think of BT oh my god and the rest yeah he must have been getting plenty which is mental that's crazy and he does it for a long time he does it So he fronts their football coverage for best part of the next decade.

29:25But much like the F1 fans before him, football fans aren't exactly enamored with Jake. So he gets a lot of abuse online from just, I mean, I kind of feel like I came late to the hating Jake Humphrey game. I found him relatively inoffensive. His whole sort of shtick is that he's trying to be really matey with these ex-pundits. but judging by quite a few clips that go around on the internet he doesn't always judge that very well so one of my favourites was 2016 he makes a pretty ill-judged joke at the expense of David James we've got a clip here so I would have been inclined to have given that but I'm not a referee we've noticed some say you weren't a goalkeeper either alright thanks a lot that's a joke the spin of the head of David you fucking what that's a joke Who are you?

30:15Sorry What did you fucking say Zambuki Didn't even see him Yeah She's like She's needless Why Why are you mugging off David Jones David Jones by all accounts Lovely man I think David Jindler Probably has a similar opinion About Jake As David James does So there's another clip Where he Cracks a joke about David's Like We'll play the clip Cracks a joke about His ripped jeans And behind Jake's back He Does a wanker sign